Unplanned Perfection
by littlecat358
Summary: Bella and Alice were best friends, which made Bella the only girl off limits to Alice's brother Edward. When a party the summer after graduation gets out of control, Bella's world is turned upside down. "He doesn't know. I don't want him to."
1. Prologue

Prologue:

"Honey, is there someone that you need us to call?" the nurse asked me as she walked me to one of the rooms.

"Uh, no. I called my dad. He should be here in a few hours, but there's no one else."

The nurse looked at me sadly for a moment, but then quickly adjusted her mood.

"Well, we'll get you all settled and make sure you're comfortable, okay?"

I nodded and winced in pain as another contraction hit. I had to stop walking and bend over and the nurse just stood with me until it passed.

"We're going right in here, honey. My names Carla. I'll help you get changed and then we'll check you out, okay?"

"Thank you."

Carla helped me out of my black maternity yoga pants and sweatshirt and put me into a hospital gown that tied in the front. My belly bulged out and I was fully on display, but as another contraction bowled me over, I didn't really have the ability to care.

Carla got me into the bed and strapped a white elastic band over my belly. Almost immediately I hurt the "thump thump thump thump" that I knew instantly as my baby's heartbeat.

She felt around my belly. "This one's a big one. Do you know what you're having?"

"No, I didn't really want to know. I kind of like surprises."

"That's always fun. I love announcing the sex to the parents." She gasped a little as she realized what she had said. I decided to put her out of her misery.

"It's okay. The Dad and I aren't in contact. Trust me, it's better that way."

She nodded in understanding.

"All right, honey, I need you to bend your knees up and put them in the stirrups."

I did as she told me and winced a little as she poked and prodded me down below. I took deep breaths just like that stupid Lamaze video had shown me. I was trying to hide the fact that I was a little freaked out. I was in labor. LA-BOR. I was having a baby. What the fuck was I going to do with a baby? And I was alone. No one else was here with me. It wasn't like those movies where you see the proud nervous husband or boyfriend pacing back and forth. No one was holding my hand. No one would look at me lovingly and tell me what a good job I had done when it was all over.

I had some stuff; a crib and a car seat, but that was about it. I didn't have a baby shower and I didn't register for any gifts. No one would buy them for me anyway. I didn't really have any friends other than Riley, but he was a 19-year-old boy, what did he know about babies? And, of course, there was Jake, but he was completely freaked out by my whole situation. On top of that, he was dirt poor.

Most of the girls in my classes looked at me with sympathy.

_That poor girl, whatever her name is, No need to invite her to any parties since she's knocked up._

My dad had bought me the car seat. Being the chief of police in Forks had its benefits. He knew which car seat was the safest. My mom bought me the crib and had it shipped to me. We weren't close anymore, but at least she acknowledged that I still existed and that I was about to become a mother myself.

"You're about 5 centimeters dilated and 80% effaced. It could happen quickly or slowly, but if we're going to get you an epidural we should do it pretty soon."

I shook my head. "Um, my doctor told me about a narcotic, can I have something like that?"

I didn't know exactly why I opted out of the epidural….oh wait, yes I did. It had something to do with the big fat fucking needle that they would have had to stick into my spine. Uh….no thank you.

She smiled and nodded. "Sure thing."

The next couple of hours passed by quickly. As high as I felt from the narcotic, the pain of each contraction still tore through me. I screamed and cursed and suddenly I felt like I needed to just fucking push. I needed to get this kid out of me. Minutes later, my doctor, Dr. Stewart, strolled in all nonchalant, wearing a robe type thing, plastic gloves, and a mask and finally let me push.

I pushed for 20 motherfucking minutes before I felt that little sucker squirt out from between my legs. And as much as it still hurt, there was instantaneous relief of the pressure.

"It's a boy!" Carla grinned at me.

"A boy?"

She placed him on my chest and I just stared at him. He was wrinkly and bloody and kind of white, but he was absolutely the most beautiful creature I had ever seen.

"I'm going to go clean him up while you deliver the placenta and get sewn up okay, honey? I'll bring him right back."

_Uh, wait, sewn up?_

"Sewn up?" I whimpered.

Dr. Stewart looked at me and patted the inside of my knee. He's pretty massive, Bella, you've got a pretty good tear. I'll need to stitch you up.

"Uh, okay. If you're gonna stitch me up can you put in an extra one?" I asked only half joking.

Dr. Stewart got me immediately and chuckled. "Sure, Bella," he placated.

I laid back and felt more contractions, but I couldn't bring myself to care. I had a son. My son. My 9 pound 1 ounce baby boy.

About an hour later, my dad rushed through the door with a hand full of yellow roses.

"Oh God, Bells, I'm so sorry. I tried to get here as fast as I could. I even put my lights on for a little while, but I felt kind of guilty so…"

I smiled as my dad's eyes hit the bundle resting in my arms. He approached me silently and stared down. I pushed the blue swaddling blanket away from his face so my dad could get a good look.

"Oh, Bella, he's beautiful," my dad sighed.

"I know. He's like a little angel. Or, a big angel."

"Yeah, he's pretty big. Did everything go….alright?" he asked hesitantly.

"Everything went fine, Dad. He's perfect."

"He sure is, Bells. What's his name?"

"Charles Anthony Swan."

My Dad's mouth opened and then closed again. He picked up one of Charlie's little hands and I could see a very silent tear trickle down his cheek.

"This right here, Daddy, is unplanned perfection," I smiled.


	2. Painful Memories

**AN: For anyone reading this the second time around. There have been a few changes. I originally posted this prior to my current fabulous beta and we wanted to make sure that the earlier chapters meshed with the later ones. It's nothing big, but thought I'd mention it just in case. **

**Disclaimer: Everything Twilight related belongs to Stephenie Meyers. This story line and any original characters belong to me. **

**XXXXXXXX**

Chapter 1: Painful Memories

BPOV

"Bella?" The voice shouting my name was so familiar. "Bella! Holy shit!"

I turned around quickly and my stomach dropped. I could feel my heart rate speed exponentially and thump painfully in my chest. Tiny little arms wrapped around my shoulders and squeezed. I held my breath as my arms loosely returned the hug.

"I was wondering if I would see you. I knew you were going to school in Seattle, but I figured you might have come back this summer. Did you graduate?" Alice prattled on, completely unaware of how uncomfortable I was.

_This is not good._

"Uh, yeah. In May." I couldn't get more than that out of my mouth before she was talking again."

"That's awesome. Did you like Seattle? I loved being in Boston. The city is so alive."

I glanced around nervously, wondering where Jake and Charlie were.

I had been back in Forks for a few weeks now. The lease on our apartment in Seattle had expired a week after graduation and since I didn't have a job lined up I decided to come back home until I could figure out what I wanted to do.

Dad had been so excited. He had taken to the role of Grampa quickly after Charlie was born, but unfortunately, we didn't see him nearly as much as he would have liked. After Charlie was born, I stayed in Seattle. I had been set up with a one-bedroom apartment through campus family housing and I worked in their on-site daycare full-time through the summer; scaling back my hours once the fall semester started. They allowed me to bring Charlie to work with me while I was there and I got free daycare when I was in class. I tried to come home as often as possible, but I knew it wasn't nearly enough.

After Jake's initial freak-out about the whole 'Bella's having a baby' thing, he was as supportive as a teenage boy possibly could have been from three hours away. He had fallen in love with Charlie almost immediately. Thus 'Uncle Jake' was born and the boys had been fairly inseparable since we moved back.

"Um, so what are you doing here, Alice?" I had never expected to see any of the Cullens back in Forks again, so Alice's sudden appearance had definitely thrown me off.

She furrowed her brow and stuck out her lower lip in a slight pout.

"Well it's good to see you too, Bella."

"I…I didn't mean it like that, Alice. I just never expected to see you. What has it been? Four years?" I knew exactly how long it had been almost down to the day, but she didn't need to know that. She was quiet for a few minutes and then began tugging at a short strand of her dark hair.

"You know, I tried e-mailing you after we left. I even tried texting and calling you."

"You did?" I faked surprise. I had gotten dozens of those communications before finally changing my e-mail and phone number.

A sudden shot of guilt ran through my entire body. She had been my best friend and I had completely cut her out of my life.

"Uh huh. For like two years. I finally gave up when someone else picked up one of the calls and bitched me out, telling me that obviously whomever I was trying to reach didn't want me to find them. I even tried calling your dad, but he kept giving me the same cell number and telling me that he would let you know I was trying to reach you."

"Huh."

_Oh, that's really fucking convincing, Swan._

She continued to stare at me pursing her lips and wrinkling her brow. She knew something was up.

"You didn't get any of my messages?"

"Uh, I lost my phone in the move to Seattle and had to get a new one. The University gave me a new e-mail and I never really thought to check the old one. And you know how my dad is."

_That's a good answer. She might buy it._

"I really missed you, Bella. I wish you would have called."

I swallowed, trying not to lose my composure. "I'm sorry, Alice, I missed you too. I didn't have any of your numbers and things were so crazy for me for so long, I just kind of gave up on trying to keep in contact with anyone."

_Okay, this is a good excuse. If I can get out of this in the next minute or two I might be able to avoid. . . ._

"Mooooooommmmy!" I heard Charlie singing.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck._

I didn't have time to react before Jake bounced around the corner with Charlie perched on his shoulders. Both of them had gigantic grins on their faces and I couldn't help but smile back at them before I registered the weight of the situation. I glanced at Alice out of the corner of my eye. Her eyes narrowed and her head tilted to the right as she stared at Charlie.

"Mommy, Uncka Jake let me ride the horsey."

I was staring wide eyed at Jake. His eyes met mine and his smile faded. I'm sure he could read the fear that was quickly and wickedly spreading through every cell in my body. It was then that he glanced over at Alice and understanding hit him like a ton of bricks.

"Oh Shit!"

Charlie took in a deep breath. "Mommy, Uncka Jake said 'shit'."

"Bella?"

"Uh, hey, Alice, how are you?"

"Hi, Jake," Alice's voice was almost a whisper.

"I'm gonna . . . . take Charlie . . . outside, Bells."

I nodded slowly and watched as they exited the front of the store.

"Bella?" Alice's voice was still very quiet. I took a deep breath and turned slowly on my heel to face her. I closed my eyes and tented my hands over my face with my fingers in a point between my eyebrows and my thumbs resting along my jaw.

"Motherfucking shit," I muttered under my breath.

"Oh my God!" Alice squeaked.

I opened my eyes and she was still staring towards the front of the store where Jake had exited with Charlie.

"Oh my God, Bella. Oh my God."

I didn't respond. I closed my eyes again, sucked my lower lip into my mouth and bit down as hard as I could to stop my body from shaking. It didn't work.

" Alice, I . . . . "

"Oh my God, Bella, he . . . . "

This was so not how I wanted this to happen. I was pretty sure that I never did want this to happen.

"He is, isn't he?"

I knew what she was asking and for some unknown reason it pissed me off.

"He is what, Alice?" I asked with more venom in my voice than I had intended.

Alice looked over at me, her mouth gaping open. "How is that even possible?" I could see her mind trying frantically to figure out what exactly she was seeing.

"Alice, I have no idea what you're talking about."

_Yeah, like she's going to buy that._

"He's Edward's, isn't he?"

_Fuck. That didn't take her long, did it? I guess I shouldn't be surprised._

Her eyes darted over to mine, capturing me in an intense gaze that I couldn't escape from. There was no way out of this one. I could lie, I could, but she would know better. There was absolutely no way that I could deny my son's parentage. My dad had seen it when he was just a year old, and every year he looked more and more like Edward. Everyone in this bumfuck little town knew it. That's another reason why we spent most of our time in the city. I was tired of everyone staring.

"How could you, Bella?" Alice whispered. Her face was distraught and it crumpled like she was in pain. I swallowed thickly and I couldn't respond before I saw her face twist again into one of anger.

"Does he fucking know? Did that fucker just leave you to do this on your own?"

She started muttering a whole bunch of profanities under her breath. I'm pretty sure I heard 'going to fucking kill him' along with 'motherfucking douchebag.'

"Alice, stop!" I practically yelled at her. "He doesn't know. I don't want him to."

She shut her mouth with an audible click of her teeth. I looked around and saw that there were several people just watching us. Mrs. Stanley was one of them. We had gone to school with Jessica Stanley and she was known for her big mouth. She could never keep a secret. She was also one of Edward's regular hookers. Her mother was the head checkout manager and the biggest gossip in town. I had never verbally confirmed to anyone but my dad and Jake that Edward was Charlie's father, but the whole fucking town was about to hear it now. Whether they suspected or not, they were about to know that I had confirmed it right in front of big fucking mouth Mama Stanley.

"Alice, I don't want to do this right here. "

Alice looked around and saw the curious faces that surrounded us. They quickly went back to perusing the shelves, but it was far too late.

She nodded and lowered her eyes to the floor.

"My dad's at work and I can have Jake take Charlie to the rez for a while. Why don't you come over to my dad's house around one."

"Charlie?"

"Uh, yeah, that's his name. Charles Anthony Swan."

Alice gasped a little and then tried to give me a sad smile. "Okay. Look, I understand why you don't want to do this here, but I swear to God, Bella, you better be there. I want some freaking answers; no bullshit. "

I didn't have it in me to finish the shopping. I took what was in my basket and headed towards the checkout. Suddenly it occurred to me that if Alice was here, then he could be here too.I turned quickly back around.

"Alice?" She hadn't moved and was still staring at her feet, but looked up when I called her name.

"He's not here is he?"

She shook her head. "Not yet," she mumbled quietly. She didn't look me in the eye and, although it was my own doing, it still hurt.

My heart jumped up into my throat. 'Not yet.' That meant that he would be making an appearance at some point. This was not good. I quickly loaded my groceries onto the conveyor belt. Mrs. Stanley started swiping them. I didn't look at her as I pulled my credit card out of my wallet, but I could feel her eyes boring a hole through me. I swiped my card and she handed me the slip to sign while she loaded the last of my groceries into the plastic bags.

She huffed loudly, and I accidentally and absentmindedly looked up at her.

"Edward Cullen, huh?"

I lifted my eyebrows at her and gritted my teeth.

"With all due respect, Mrs. Stanley," I ground out. "Mind your own fucking business."

I bit my lip and clenched my fist, which was leaning on the check writing table. She gasped as I wrenched the bags from her and stormed out of the store. Jake was outside with Charlie watching him run up and down the wheelchair ramp.

"I give it two hours, Bella," he sighed indicating how long it would be before everyone in town knew, without a doubt, who Charlie's father was.

"Oh, God," I moaned. He took the bags from my hand and started walking towards the car.

"Charlie, let's go baby," I called out. Charlie took a quick swing on the metal railing before loping over to me and jumping into my arms. I swooped him up and nuzzled his neck before following behind Jake. My baby's hugs always made everything better, at least for the moment. I glanced over and saw Alice getting into a black car. Her eyes were on me and Charlie. Sitting behind the steering wheel was Jasper, my other best friend from high school. He was Alice's long time boyfriend as well.

_Good to see that they are still together anyway._

His eyes were also on me and his mouth was open in complete and utter shock. I diverted my eyes and opened the backseat door to buckle Charlie in to his car seat before getting in and driving away.

I pulled out onto the main road and headed towards La Push. My brain was numb and I was almost on autopilot.

"Where are you going, Bella?" Jake asked me curiously.

"Uh Jake, would you mind looking after Charlie for me for a couple of hours?"

"Sure. Why?"

"Alice is coming over."

"Oh."

That was all that was said for the rest of the ten minute drive. I dropped Jake and Charlie off in front of the Black's house and Charlie bounded over the gravel driveway and burst through the front door of the house. He came back out for just a moment to wave.

"Bye bye, Mommy," he smiled and then blew me a kiss, which I caught and pressed into my mouth. I couldn't help the tears that were welling up in my eyes.

Jake held back for a minute and then poked his head back inside the car.

"Are you sure you want to do this on your own, Bella? I'm sure my dad would be more than willing to look after Charlie. I could go with you, for moral support and all."

"Thanks, Jake, but I think this is something I should take care of on my own."

Jake just nodded.

"Call me if you need me."

I smiled weakly at him as he closed the door.

I looked at the clock as I pulled into my dad's driveway. I had thirty-three minutes before the inquisition began. Knowing Alice, I had more like twenty-three minutes, but at this point, what did it matter? I considered for a moment making myself something to eat before realizing that I wasn't hungry in the slightest. In fact, I was pretty nauseous and fairly sure that if I consumed anything other than water, it would probably be making a reappearance.

I sat at the kitchen table with my head resting on my arms trying to figure out what I was going to say. How would I explain myself to her? She had been my best friend in high school. We didn't hide anything from each other back then. She had even called me the night she lost her virginity to Jasper.

XXXXX

Ten minutes after he had fallen asleep in her bed, she had crept out onto her balcony and phoned me.

_"Alice, what the fuck? It's one-thirty in the morning." I had grumbled._

_"Are you sitting down?" she asked in an excited whisper._

_"No, Alice, I'm lying down. I was asleep for God's sake."_

_"Do you not want to hear my news then?" she feigned hurt feelings, but I knew better._

_"I'm awake now, what's up?"_

_" Jasper and I just did it."_

_"Did what?" I asked, too groggy to even really think about what she had said._

_"We had sex."_

_"Congratulations, Alice. Did you use protection?"_

_"My dad is a doctor, Bella. He put me on birth control when I was twelve and Jasper's only ever been with Kate."_

_"Yeah, but Kate's been with Edward and who knows what kind of germs he's carrying around."_

_A thought passed through my head and I started to laugh._

_"What's so funny?" she grumbled._

_"You know that whole saying that without protection you've pretty much had sex with not only your partners, but also your partner's partners and so on and so forth."_

_"Uh, yeah I think so."_

_" So, in a round about way, you've just had sex with your brother." I laughed a little harder._

_"That's gross, Bella," Alice said flatly. "I'm going to go join my amazingly gorgeous and naked boyfriend and enjoy all of the orgasms that he is going to give me over the next several hours. Enjoy the rest of your night all by yourself."_

_"Alice, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm really happy for you. I'm just really freaking tired. Meet me for coffee in the morning?"_

_"Yeah sure, ten o'clock."_

_I hung up the phone and set it on my nightstand before burying my face into my pillow and drifting back to sleep._

_The next morning she had gone into all the gory details about her experience. And I do mean gory, right down to what happened when he popped her cherry. Lovely._

XXXXXXX

I heard the soft purr of an engine as it pulled up into the driveway behind my Volvo. There were a few minutes of silence before I heard the quiet knock on the front door.

I looked up at the clock. Five minutes to one.

"Shit," I muttered as I got up to answer it.

I opened the door and Alice stood in front of me with a solemn look on her face.

"Hi, Alice," I greeted her with a slight smile.

"Hi, Bella," she said solemly.

"No Jasper?"

"I thought that maybe this is a conversation that we needed to have without an audience," she sighed.

I nodded appreciatively and motioned for her to come into the house. She looked around the living room, glancing at everything. There were toys spread out all over the floor. A sword was stuck in between the cushions of the couch, sword in the stone style. A really annoying fire truck that not only made the emergency sound, but also played some God awful rock song, was upside down next to the coffee table. Little Charlie's footy pajamas were slung over the backside of the recliner, and a pair of tiny boxer briefs were on the floor next to it.

_Crap. He forgot to put on his underwear this morning._

We walked into the kitchen and I noticed that there were sippy cups all over the place.

"Sorry for the mess," I muttered.

"It's okay," Alice said softly. I looked up into her eyes and saw an emotion that I couldn't quite determine. It was like seeing all of the things belonging to Charlie made him more real for her. Even more real than seeing him in person. This was his home, where he lived, slept, and played.

I didn't know how to respond to her. I didn't know what to tell her, because nothing that I said would make this any easier.

"Do you want something to drink?"

"I do think I'm probably going to need some water for this conversation."

"I think you're going to need a glass of wine for this conversation."

She nodded. Sure it was only one o'clock, but this was going to be intense.

I had no idea what I was going to say. I had never imagined having to deal with this. The Cullens had all moved away. It had always been my intention to keep Charlie's existence from them, especially Edward. The more time that passed, the more confident I was that I had made the right decision. But now, now that I was face to face with my best friend, I began to question myself.

Was it fair to keep my son a secret from his family? Probably not. Okay, it wasn't fucking fair, but how could I possibly face them and admit that I had fucked their son when we weren't even in a relationship. We weren't even really friends for God's sake. I was the quiet girl who admired from afar; his sister's best friend. We spent time together for that reason alone. And I was just one of his many, many, one night stands; an unintentional conquest; a notch on his bedpost. He broke my heart without even knowing it.

I poured two glasses of white wine and set one in front of Alice. We quietly sipped on them for a while before she spoke.

"So . . . you have some splainin to do," she said quietly.

I wasn't sure if she was being playful or if she was irritated, but I didn't really want to find out.

"I didn't know you and Edward had a thing."

"We didn't."

"Uh, well by the looks of that little boy, you most certainly did have a thing."

"We didn't have a thing, Alice. I. . . we. . . I don't know how to even explain it. We were stupid and reckless. Yes, we had sex, but it was one night. That's it. And then he left. "

"Explain please," she said, rolling her hands out at me.

"Do you remember the Fourth of July party at your house? The last one? The summer after graduation?"

"Of course."

"I got really fucking plastered and Mike was all over me crying that he loved me and he wanted me back. I thought I was going to puke so I went to go lie down in your room."

"Okay."

"Except I was too drunk to realize which room I was going into. I ended up passing out on Edward's bed."

Alice nodded for me to continue.

"When I woke up, he was there. He grabbed my wrist and yanked me out of the bed. He looked really pissed off and I thought he was going to hit me."

Alice gasped. "He didn't . . . . did he?"

I shook my head.

I drifted off for a minute remembering that night.

XXXXX

_I had fallen to the floor and started scooting backwards, trying to get away, but I was still really drunk and couldn't move fast enough. He stalked over to me and picked me up off the floor by my forearms. I was really fucking scared; he looked like he was ready to kill me. He pinned me against the wall and leaned in. He smelled like whiskey and weed and a little bit like, chocolate?_

_"What the fuck are you doing in here?" he growled._

_"I, I, I'm sorry, Edward. I didn't realize . . . "_

_"Well obviously fucking not. No one's allowed in my room, Bella you know that."_

_His hands tightened around my arms and then he did something I certainly didn't expect. He pressed himself against me. His chest to my chest, his knee resting between my legs, his mouth up against my ear. I struggled for breath for a few seconds. As scared as I was, his knee was pressed right up against my clit and it felt so good. I wiggled a bit, but that only made things worse; much, much worse. He breathed hotly into my neck and then sucked my earlobe into his mouth. His hands dropped from my arms and rested on the curve of my ass right where it met the tops of my thighs._

_He squeezed and then grabbed my hips, roughly pressing himself against them. His lips smashed into mine and his tongue forced its way into my mouth. Not that I was resisting in the slightest. There was some kind of raw passion that was driving him. I could feel him hard against my stomach. I kissed him back, not allowing myself to be completely overpowered by him. He groaned into my mouth and I couldn't help but whimper. He lifted me up by my thighs and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He ground his erection into me and I felt an ache from between my legs. Pressing me firmly into the wall to hold me into place, he let go of me with his hands and ripped my shirt up over my head._

_"Uh, Edward?" I tried to protest, but I wasn't even convincing myself at that point. He continued to kiss me on my mouth, my chin, my neck, and once my breasts were in view, he kissed me there too. I moaned loudly. It felt so fucking good. He felt so good._

_"Oh Fuck it," he growled as he left the wall and carried me over to the bed. He dropped me, literally dropped me, on the bed and yanked his t-shirt off._

_He made quick work of my jeans as well as his own and then he knelt down onto the floor. He yanked my ankles hard, pulling my butt to the edge of the bed. I winced in pain, because his fingers had dug right into my Achilles tendons. His eyes met with mine and he smirked and let his tongue roll over his upper lip before pulling my panties down my legs._

_"Take off your bra," he ordered. I sat up briefly and unhooked my bra, tossing it over the edge of the bed onto the floor with the rest of my clothes. He shoved me back down onto the bed and before I had a chance to react his mouth was on me._

_"Oh Fuck. Oh my God, Edward!" I groaned as his tongue flicked at my clit. I felt his fingers spread me and then his tongue glided over my entrance before plunging in. I arched my back and cried out. His thumb reached up and began rubbing circles as his tongue continued, in and out, in and out._

_He withdrew his tongue and replaced it with his fingers, first one and then two. I thrust my hips towards him and felt his tongue working my clit again, sucking and nipping at it roughly. I knew it was wrong, that we shouldn't be doing it, that I didn't want to do it, not like that. We were both completely fucked up. But I couldn't bring myself to make him stop. It felt too fucking amazing._

_"Jesus Christ!" I squeaked out. I closed my eyes and fisted the comforter as I felt the tension growing. My stomach tightened and I was done. My muscles clenched around his fingers. As the wave of pleasure rolled over me I felt him withdraw his fingers. His tongue continued to lap at me. I tilted my head back and threw my arm over my eyes. I felt him as he let go of my thighs and then I felt the bed dip. When I dropped my arm and opened my eyes he was hovering over my face. His legs were straddling mine and his hands were on either side of my head._

_"I've often wondered what you tasted like, Bella. Fucking amazing, just as I expected."_

_How does one respond to shit like that?_

_I just stared at him. I tried to sit up and roll away, but he stopped me._

_"Where do you think you're going? I'm not finished with you," he grinned crookedly at me and licked his lips again. I couldn't help but smile lazily back at him. He lifted me slightly so that I was lying with my head up on the pillow and then he yanked the comforter down to the bottom of the bed. He shoved his knee between my legs and spread them, before attacking my mouth again, biting at my lower lip and then licking at it before shoving his tongue into my mouth. I could taste myself on him and my first reaction was one of disgust, but as he continued, I didn't have the resolve to pull away. I felt him reach down and wrestle with his boxer briefs. Then his cock was on me. I could feel it, warm and a little bit wet against the inside of my thigh. I gasped and writhed around. He nudged my entrance with it and then stopped._

_"I'm giving you a chance to say no, Bella. Say it now and I'll walk away."_

_Well, that was really fucking unfair. I had an absolutely gorgeous and naked man hovering over me and he asks me to tell him to stop. Fuck that._

_"Just fucking do it, Edward," I growled._

_He chuckled softly and pulled back a little before slamming into me, Really. Fucking. Hard._

_I cried out in pain as I felt like someone was ripping me apart from the inside. At the same time Edward swore loudly._

_"Jesus Fucking Christ, Bella. You are so fucking tight."_

_I couldn't breathe. He held my hips tightly as he continued to drill into me over and over again. I held my breath so that I wouldn't lose it. I felt tears streaming out from the corners of my eyes. This was not what I had expected. Alice had described it as an amazing experience with a little bit of pain before it started to feel good. This did not feel good and there was more than just a little bit of pain. It was excruciating. I trembled, unable to speak, to tell him to slow down._

_Edward yanked my leg up so that it was over his shoulder and continued to impale me over and over again. I let out a painful sob as the position change thrust him deeper, but he didn't seem to notice. He wasn't looking at me. His eyes were closed, but the expression on his face looked to be a mixture of ecstasy and anger._

_"I hope you're close, Bella cause you're way too tight for me to last."_

_I let out my breath and gasped loudly. There was no way I was going to be able to orgasm. My whole body was shivering as the pain faded away and turned into a steady burn._

_"God, I can't stop, Bella, I'm gonna cum."_

_He pumped two more times before I felt his cock pulsing inside of me. He grunted loudly and his arms started shaking a little. Then he collapsed on top of me breathing heavily and sweating. We just lay there for a few minutes. He was so heavy._

_"Ahhhh," I cried as he withdrew himself._

_He flipped over onto his back and I covered my eyes again with my forearm so that he couldn't see that I was crying. He rolled out of the bed and I chanced a glance at him as he stood up and went to the closet, grabbing a towel and throwing it at me._

_"Here, clean yourself up," he said quietly. Then he disappeared into the bathroom. I heard the water from the shower turn on as I started to dab at myself. My girly bits were on fire. Thank God his sheets were black because from what Alice said about the whole bleeding thing, I was pretty sure I would be staining them._

_I awoke the next morning still in his bed. I was naked and cold. The sheets were right where they were when Edward had disappeared into the bathroom and I must have fallen asleep. He was nowhere to be seen. It was pretty obvious that he had not slept in the bed that night. I shifted and groaned as I felt my thighs ache and my cooter screamed at me. I sat up slowly and painfully, sliding my legs over the side of the bed as carefully as I could. I was kind of gasping and trying to adjust my hips so that I could find the most comfortable position, but I quickly figured out that there was no comfortable position, it hurt everywhere._

_I looked around locating my clothes where they had been thrown the night before. I put my bra on first and then reached for my panties. As I stood up to put them on I glanced down and saw bruises just starting to purple up all over my body. There was one on my shoulder, a few on my ribs and when I turned to look at my back I could see there were several there too. There were finger shaped bruises on my hips and dried bloodstains trailing down my inner thigh._

_"Jesus Christ," I sighed as I traced the bruises with my own fingertips. I pulled on my t-shirt and then carefully slid my jeans up over my hips. I tiptoed out of Edward's bedroom. The house was dark and silent. I crept down the hallway and then the stairs. When I reached the kitchen I looked over at the neon clock on the stovetop. It was eight a.m., way too early for partying teenagers to be awake._

_I slipped on my flip flops, grabbed my bag out of the hall closet and left the house before anyone caught me. I was supposed to be sleeping at Alice's house, but I was not prepared to explain where I had disappeared to or where I had actually slept. I fished my car keys out of my bag and started the truck up. It was loud; too loud, but I didn't care. I just slammed on the gas and high tailed it out of there as fast as I could._

_An hour later, I was sitting in my shower crying. What the fuck had I done? I couldn't have waited a few more months to go to college and find a boyfriend? Edward? Regardless of how many times I had lusted over him throughout the years, there was just no excuse for me to stoop that low; to finally let him have me after years of protecting myself from him. Learning to ignore him had been difficult, especially on the occasion when he showed any interest, which was usually when he was drunk, but I had done it. I had successfully prevented myself from becoming one of his whores. Well, at least I HAD been successful._

_Ugg, the thought of how many women he had been with made me sick. I could no longer hold back. I crawled up onto my hands and knees and puked until all that was left was dry heaving and yellow bile. When the water started to run cold I figured it was time to get out. My dad had already left for work so I didn't have to worry about running into him when I was so upset. I dressed in a bright blue tunic and black leggings, pulled my hair up into a wet, messy ponytail, and slipped on some ballet flats. As I was sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee and eating an English muffin with peanut butter, my cell phone started buzzing. I lifted it and grumbled as I saw who it was._

_"Good morning, sunshine. Where did you disappear to?"_

_"I'm at home, Alice, why?" I snapped. I didn't mean to be such a bitch, but I was really not in the mood for little miss perky._

_"Grumpy, grumpy. Do you wanna go get some coffee?"_

_I stared down at the coffee cup in my hands._

_"Uh, sure."_

_"Okay, meet you at ten."_

_An hour later I was sitting in the Forks coffee shop with Alice. She was bouncing off the walls._

_"Are you sure you need that, Alice?"_

_She giggled and shrugged. "I'm just excited, silly. Last night was a total blast. You will not believe what Jasper did to me."_

_I shook my head. "Please spare me the details. I don't feel like throwing up again this morning."_

_She frowned at me for a minute before grinning wildly. "Eww, Bella, you really shouldn't drink so much that you puke. Besides, if I don't let you live vicariously, how on earth are you going to tell the man who steals your virtue what you really want him to do?"_

_I blushed furiously and bowed my head as the bell above the door jingled signaling a new customer. A few minutes later Alice squealed._

_"Hey, Edward, come here."_

_My stomach dropped._

_"What do you want, Alice?" I heard him grumble from the counter._

_"I have something to ask you, stupid, come here."_

_"What?" his voice growled from a lot closer._

_"So, Bella here is going to college in Seattle in a couple of months and she needs to know how to attract a guy to pop her cherry. Any suggestions?"_

_Edward choked and spit out some coffee._

_"What?"_

_I could feel the fire consuming my face and I chanced a look at him. He was glaring at me. Alice didn't seem to notice the death shooting from his eyes. I supposed I deserved that. I hadn't told him I was a virgin and I knew very well that Edward Cullen did not do virgins. I had even heard of girls losing their virginity to random guys so that they could screw him._

_"Ew . . . gross," Alice whined as she wiped some coffee from her arm._

_"Seriously, the only guys worth fucking in Forks have been taken and Bella needs to lose her virginity at some point."_

_"Alice!" I hissed at her. "Shut the fuck up."_

_Alice snickered._

_"I gotta go," Edward mumbled._

_"Tanya need her morning latte?" Alice asked in a sickeningly sweet voice._

_She never really hid her dislike of Edward's long time girlfriend._

_Edward didn't answer. He slammed open the door to the shop and stormed out, refusing to look back. That was the last time I saw Edward Cullen._

XXXXXX

Alice stared at me. Obviously I spared her a few of the details, but I pretty much relayed the entire night and the next morning to her.

"That fucking prick!" she shouted. I flinched.

"Alice, he didn't know."

"Maybe not at the time, but he sure as hell knew the morning after. Why the fuck was he so rough? He never said a thing to you?"

I shook my head.

"I never saw him again. I didn't go to your going away party."

"I remember, you had the . . . flu." Understanding washed over her and I sighed.

"Oh my God, Bella. Did you know? Then?"

"No. I didn't find out until I was already at school. I had been feeling nauseous for a few weeks. I had headaches and stomach cramps. I went into the student medical center to figure out what was wrong with me. I was freaking out that I had meningitis or something. They did mandatory pregnancy tests on all the female students who came in. I never even fucking suspected. I had been having spotting during the time my period was supposed to come so I figured the stress of everything was just stunting it. When the test came back positive I pretty much fainted. Three days later was the first time you e-mailed me."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Alice's voice was slightly higher than normal and it sounded like she was trying not to cry.

"I didn't know what to do, Alice. I was fucking freaking out. It never even occurred to me that we didn't use protection. We must have been pretty fucking drunk."

"No shit. Edward has never, ever gone bareback. He doesn't trust women."

Alice wrinkled her nose and then added. "Well, at least he said he's never gone without, but apparently, he has."

_Fan-fucking-tastic. Well my little surprise certainly wasn't going to help his trust issues._

"I stared at your e-mail for a good two hours trying to figure out how to respond. I didn't want him to know and I knew it wasn't something that you would have been able to keep from him. I knew he would be pissed off. He would have told me to get rid of it. Abortion wasn't an option for me and I didn't think that I would be able to just give him up to some stranger. I didn't want to ruin Edward's life." I bit my lip. "And I was afraid of him. He hated me, Alice. He was so disgusted by what we had done that he couldn't even look at me. I couldn't bare the thought of my child growing up with his parents hating each other, always fighting. I lived that life. It was horrible.

I could see tears welling up in her eyes. She stood up and wandered into the living room. She walked over to the fireplace and ran her fingers over the mantle. I saw her moving from photo to photo. They were pictures of Charlie. A photo of me in the hospital holding him in my arms as a newborn, with my dad proudly holding his tiny little hand; A picture of Charlie at three months of age in the middle of a giant giggle; A picture of Charlie learning to walk; One of me laughing and holding a birthday cake with a big number one on it as Charlie's hands grabbed a big chunk of frosting. She moved to the wall. There was a photo of Charlie in a bright yellow raincoat and matching galoshes standing in the middle of a puddle watching his little rubber duck floating around; A picture of my dad holding Charlie up on a pony at the state fair. He had a little straw cowboy hat on and big red cowboy boots. The most recent one was of me in my cap and gown at graduation. Charlie was planting a giant kiss on my cheek. Alice glided her fingers over the frame of the photo and then turned to face me. The tears were no longer brimming, but had slid over and were streaming down her porcelain cheeks.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I should have been there for you."

I shook my head. "There's nothing you could have done, Alice. I mean, really, if I had told you, what would you have done?"

"I don't know. I could have been there for you. My mom and dad, they would have been there for you. Even Emmett would have been there for you, even if Edward hadn't been."

"See, that's just it. I didn't want you guys to take sides. The only thing Edward did wrong was cheat on his girlfriend and I know I wasn't the first."

"You weren't the last either."

"Thanks," I said sharply. "Whatever Edward did after you guys left is none of my business and I do not want to know."

"What are you going to do now?"

"I don't know," I sighed. Is he coming back here?"

Alice nodded.

"When?"

"A week or two. He's considering medical school at the University of Washington."

"Shit. What about you Alice, what are your plans?"

"Jasper and I are going to stick around. Jasper has a couple of job interviews in Port Angeles and a few in Seattle. We'll just wait and see what the best option is before settling down. I can work from anywhere really."

"If I ran, would you leave it alone?"

Alice sat down again and put her hand on top of mine. "Bella, please don't run. I know I wasn't there for you when you needed me, but that little boy is my family, my nephew. Now that I know, I couldn't possibly just leave it alone. We have a right to get to know him. My mom and dad, they deserve to be a part of his life. And Edward. . . . I know you thought that what you were doing was the best way, but it wasn't. He needs to know."

I sighed and banged my head on the table.

"What do you think he'll say?" I asked, my head still buried in my arms.

I didn't even need to look at Alice to know that she had a worried look on her face.

"He's going to go fucking ballistic, Bella. I can't lie."

"Alice, please don't make me do this."

"I'm going to ask my mom and dad to come home. They'll have a much clearer view on all of this. Maybe we can all figure out how to best approach Edward with this."

I just nodded. Alice placed her hand on the back of my head.

"This isn't going to be easy, but I promise that I'll be here for you as best as I can. You'll get through it."

I choked back a sob and I could feel the tears slipping down my cheeks. We sat like that for another half hour without saying a word. Finally Alice spoke up.

"Bella?"

"Huh?"

"Can I meet him?"

I lifted my head and looked at her before nodding.

"Do you guys want to come to dinner tonight? At the old house? "

"Let me talk to my dad. I need to pick Charlie up from Jake's. I'll give you a call in a bit?"

Alice grabbed my cell phone and plugged her number into it. Then she used it to call herself so that she had my number as well.

"I should go back to Jasper. Can I tell him?"

"Doesn't he already know?"

"He knows that you are walking around with a child that looks exactly like Edward, that's about it."

"Go ahead, Alice. It's going to come out to your family now anyway. I suppose that Jasper's probably going to be the most understanding. Might as well start there."

Alice stood up and pulled me up to her into a tight hug. "We're your family too, Bella. We always have been. I just wish you had known that four years ago."

Alice squeezed me one more time before heading towards the door.

"Alice?"

She turned. "Yeah?"

"Don't tell Edward. Not yet."

"I won't, Bella. Just . . . . don't run."

I nodded and she left.

XXXXXXX

On my way to the reservation I stopped by the police station. I walked through the glass door and saw my dad sitting at his desk with his feet up while drinking a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. He glanced up from his paper and smiled at me.

"Hey, Bells, what's up?"

"Are you working hard, Dad, or hardly working?" I teased.

"Hey now, this here is research," he chuckled.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure, have a seat." He stood up and cleared a few file folders from the chair next to his desk. "Where's Charlie?"

"He's with Jake and Billy. I'm on my way to go get him."

My dad just looked at me for a few minutes before raising his eyebrows.

"Something on your mind, Bella?"

"Uh, yeah, Dad. Um, I ran into an old friend today."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Alice."

My dad's mouth dropped open for a brief moment before he shut it again.

"Cullen Dad. Alice Cullen."

"That's the only Alice I would know of, Bella. And?"

"She saw Charlie."

My dad didn't say anything for a few minutes. When he did, it startled me.

"I suppose you didn't even try to deny it?"

"Seriously, Dad, do you really think I could?" I smiled a little bit. "People who barely knew Edward can see how much Charlie looks like him. The rumors have been flying for years."

My dad nodded. "I suppose you're right."

"By the way, Mrs. Big Mouth Stanley overheard Alice's and my conversation."

Dad groaned. "Well, I suppose I shouldn't be too surprised. It was bound to happen sooner or later."

I just nodded. We were silent for another few minutes.

"Alice wants to meet him."

"I can imagine."

"She invited us over for dinner tonight. Do you want to come?"

Dad shook his head. "I have to work late tonight Bells. I'll grab a bite at the diner. Is Edward going to be there?"

"No, Edward's not in town yet."

"Yet?"

"He is coming back dad. We can talk about this later," I said, standing up and grabbing my purse. "I've got to go get Charlie before Jake starts charging me for daycare."

I kissed my dad gently on the cheek and stepped back out into the warm summer afternoon air. I breathed in deeply and pulled out my cell phone to call Alice.

_This is only the beginning, Bella. Life as you know it is about to change drastically…again._

_XXXXXX_

**AN: Let me know what you think. Even though future chapters are written and posted, I really enjoy seeing everyone's thought processes as you make your way through the story. :o)**


	3. Introductions and Explanations

**AN: Okay, not a whole lot to say here. This is the newly beta'd version of this chapter. Thank you Mollie for going over this for me along with everything else you are doing. LOL.**

**I have no idea what I said in my original AN, but that's okay. Just know that I appreciate your reviews, your thoughts, and your support.**

**Disclaimer: Anything Twilighted related is not mine. The storyline is though.**

**XXXXX**

Chapter 2: Introductions and Explanations

BPOV

At five-thirty that evening I pulled up into the old Cullen place. Not that it was really that old, maybe only fifteen years. It was practically brand new compared to most of the homes in Forks, but the house had been empty for nearly four years.

I opened up the back door of the car and unbuckled Charlie. He jumped out and grabbed my hand. We walked silently up to the front door. Okay, I walked, Charlie bounced. The boy was physically incapable of walking normally. I lifted Charlie up so he could press the doorbell. The door flew open and Alice stood there with a big smile on her face. Charlie stepped backwards and grabbed onto my leg. I rubbed the top of his head and smiled at Alice.

"Come on in," she said warmly.

I tried to move forward, but Charlie was still holding onto my leg. I lifted him up into my arms and followed Alice into the house. She closed the door behind us. The house was just as I remembered it, all coffee and cream with a few dusky blues thrown in. The kitchen had maple cabinets with dark granite counter tops and stainless steel appliances. There was a big island in the center that was covered in platters of cheese, crackers, vegetables, fruit, and a couple of bottles of wine.

"I've taken the dust covers off of almost everything. It's going to take some time to get everything organized again, but we're getting there," Alice said quietly. She was staring at Charlie.

She placed a hand on his back. "Would you like something to eat, sweetheart?"

Charlie lifted his head from my shoulder and looked at me.

"Charlie, this is mommy's friend Alice. Can you say hello?"

"Hewo," he said timidly.

"Just give him a little bit, he'll warm up," I assured her. She nodded and smiled at him.

She handed him a piece of cheddar cheese and he took it and began nibbling on it.

"I'm gonna put you down baby. You're getting too heavy to hold all the time."

I set him down on the kitchen stool and he began grabbing at the fruit.

"Bella?"

I turned around and was looking into my favorite pair of steely grey eyes. I grinned at him and he smiled back gently. "Jasper."

I moved towards him and he enveloped me into his comforting embrace. He towered over me and had to lean over to whisper in my ear.

"I am so sorry we weren't here for you, Bella."

"Don't, Jasper. This was my choice and I don't regret it. I regret the hurt that it's going to cause, but I don't regret the decision. I did what I had to do."

Jasper nodded against the top of my head. "Wow!" he sighed.

"What?"

"He looks just like him."

"I know. Just wait; he has a lot of his mannerisms too."

I heard Alice giggling and turned around. Charlie had two carrot sticks in his hand.

"Charlie," I called to him and heard Jasper laugh loudly when he turned around with the carrot sticks shoved up his nose.

"You be careful, you push those too far up there and they'll get stuck in your brain."

Charlie grinned at me and turned back to Alice.

"Alice, can you make sure he doesn't put those in his mouth please?"

Alice laughed and nodded. We talked and nibbled and drank for about an hour before dinner was ready. We sat down to marinated chuck steaks, rosemary potatoes, and steamed broccoli. Charlie started fidgeting in his seat and I excused him to explore.

"Don't touch anything, Charlie," I warned.

"Kay," was his only answer. I bit my lip, hoping that he wouldn't break anything.

Jasper, Alice, and I remained at the table drinking our wine.

"That boy can eat, where the heck does he put it all?" Jasper asked.

"He has a lot of energy. He started walking at 9 months old and from that point on he just about ran everywhere he went. He's got more energy than Dad and I put together. Grampa's in the best shape of his life just from chasing after that boy."

They both chuckled and then were silent for a few minutes. I could feel a little bit of tension. Alice kept looking at me and then back at Charlie, but I couldn't bring myself to break it.

"Bella?" she said softly.

"Huh?"

"I called my parents."

I sucked in a deep breath. I knew that it was coming, but it still didn't make it feel any better.

"What did they say?" I asked, pretending as if I wasn't completely freaking out on the inside.

"I didn't tell them about Charlie."

"What _did_ you tell them?"

"I told them there are some things that we needed them for. Some really important things."

"Okay." I didn't know what else to say. My mind was flipping through their possible reactions like I was shuffling a deck of cards.

"They're flying in tomorrow."

_What?_

"Just like that? They didn't ask what or why?"

"Bella, I rarely ever ask my parents for their help. When I ask, they don't question, they just do."

"Are they going to be angry with me?"

Oh fuck! Was I really ready for this? Could I do this? I wasn't being given a choice anymore and I was fucking terrified.

Alice sighed. "I know you believe that your intentions were good, but Charlie is our family too and you kept him away from us for three years, not to mention the whole pregnancy. My parents have taught us to value family above all else. I understand, because I know what a dick my brother can be and I know the whole story. I just don't know how much you are going to want to share with my parents, and without the full story, I don't know how they are going to react. You need to prepare yourself. There are a lot of emotions at play here."

Just then we heard the sound of music. Not really music, but a musical-like sound. I stood up.

"Charlie?" I followed the sound down the first floor hallway. The sound was getting louder and louder. Alice and Jasper were behind me as we entered through the solid double doors into the music room. Alice gasped.

Charlie was sitting on the piano bench in the dark, his tiny legs dangling over the bench. Only the moonlight was lighting the room. A large white sheet was still covering most of the piano, but the bit over the keyboard had been pulled back and Charlie was caressing the ivory and black keys with reverence. We all stood still just watching him. Every now and then he would lean in and stick his face close as he pressed a key down. He would close his eyes and listen to the sound it made.

"Oh my God," Alice whispered as she leaned back into Jasper.

"What?" I asked, taken off guard by her reaction.

"My mom said that Edward used to do the exact same thing when he was little, before he started to play. That's how she knew he would be amazing."

Charlie must have heard the whispering because he turned around and smiled shyly.

"Mommy?"

"Yes baby?"

"Can we get one of dese?"

XXXXXX

"Dad, I need you to come with me."

"Bella, they're not going to hurt you," he said dismissively.

"Really Dad? What would you do if I had never told you about Charlie? If I just disappeared and then showed up four years later with a grandchild you never knew existed?"

My dad thought about it for a minute and then shook his head.

"I'd be pretty pissed," he confirmed.

"That's what I thought. Please Dad?" I begged, trying to get him to understand just how much I needed his support.

"Who's going to look after Charlie?"

"Riley's coming down from Seattle."

My dad lifted his eyebrows at me.

"And where is Riley planning on staying Bells?"

I frowned. This was clearly my dad's way of letting me know that Riley would not be staying at his house. Not that I had planned for that anyway.

"He's staying at the Forks Motel Dad, but he'll look after Charlie at the house."

My dad wasn't incredibly fond of my on again off again college '_boyfriend_', if you could even call him that. He was a perpetual student, changing his major every few years so that he didn't have to go out and get a real job. My dad was under the impression that I was just a convenient booty call. And maybe I was, but so was he. We were friends and Charlie like him. He knew that my son came first, but I'd be damned if I was going to let Edward Cullen be my one and only just because he knocked me up.

There were a few guys over the years. Riley was the only one that Charlie ever met and that's because we were friends before we started sleeping together. In fact he was my babysitter on a few occasions when I went out to get myself laid. He had suggested one evening that instead of fucking some shithead that I hadn't known very long, that I just stay in with him and he'd take care of me. And so he did. I stood up my date and for the last year, it had only been Riley. Not very often, but enough so that I don't go crazy with pent up sexual frustration. I had been home for six weeks and had only seen him once when I made a quick trip up to Seattle to pick up the security deposit on my old apartment. I stopped by his place and it took us about 9.6 seconds to grab a condom and be completely naked on the living room floor. I was back in Forks by dinner.

When we got home from Alice's two nights ago I called him.

_"Hey Ri, how are you?"_

_"Bella baby. I'm good. Are you okay?"_

_"I'm fine," I lied. I was anything but fine. Riley must have heard it in my voice._

_"You don't sound fine, what's the matter?"_

_"I have a problem."_

_"Is Charlie okay?" he asked in a slightly concerned voice._

_"Charlie's fine. He's growing like a weed and eating everything in sight."_

_"That's my boy. So what's the problem Baby?"_

_"His father."_

_"Who's father?" I could hear the confusion in his voice._

_"Charlie's."_

_"Um, Bella? I thought you said his father wasn't involved."_

_"He's not," I snapped._

_"Okay, I'm confused."_

_I took a deep breath and started._

_"I ran into the sister of Charlie's father the other day. She came back to Forks unexpectedly. Well, I wasn't expecting it anyway."_

_"Okay."_

_"She saw Charlie."_

_"I still don't get it."_

_"Riley, do you ever listen to me?" I was annoyed. He had heard the story before, kind of._

_"No, I mostly stare at your boobs. Or your ass. Depends on if you're coming or going." He chuckled. I didn't. There was silence._

_"I'm sorry, baby, please refresh my memory."_

_"Charlie's father was a one night stand," I said repeating what I had told him when I first found out I was pregnant. "He left for college and I never saw him again. I never told him about Charlie and I never told any of his family."_

_"Okay, I remember all that," he confirmed._

_"Three days ago, his sister, who also happens to be my best friend from high school, by the way, strolls into town and spots me. Then she spotted Charlie, who proceeded to 'mommy' me as loud as he possibly could."_

_"I'm with you so far."_

_"Charlie looks exactly like his father. And I don't mean resembles. I mean if I didn't know any better I'd think he provided 100% of the DNA for him. Like a clone or something."_

_"So the sister knows. Did she tell him?"_

_"No."_

_Riley sighed on the other end of the line._

_"Jesus Christ, Riley really?"_

_"I'm sorry Bella, I just don't see why this is a big deal."_

_"They are all returning to Forks, Riley. His sister, his parents, and him."_

_"Oh," Riley said as if the light bulb had finally turned on._

_"Yeah. See the problem now?"_

_"Okay, so for how long?"_

_"I don't know. They still own their house here. Alice and her boyfriend Jasper are looking for work in the area and Charlie's father is looking into medical school at the University of Washington. His parents may settle back here permanently."_

_"He's a fucking doctor, Bella?" he practically shouted into the phone._

_"No. Not yet," I winced, pulling the receiver from my ear._

_"Shit girl, get the fucker to pay child support."_

_"Riley. You. Are. Not. Helping. His family has always been wealthy. If I was looking for child support I could have done it a long time ago."_

_"Well move back here with me, baby. Seattle's a big city. Even if some of the family do end up here it's not likely that you'll see them."_

_"I told Alice I wouldn't run."_

_"Why the fuck would you do that?"_

_"Run?" I asked, not quite understanding his question. Wasn't it obvious why I would run?_

_"No, tell her that you wouldn't."_

_"Because Jackass, the family has enough money that if I ran, they would hire a private detective and hunt me down. Then they'd pay for the best lawyers out there to prove that I'm an unfit mother and take him away from me." My voice was a little panicky. Silence._

_"Riley?"_

_"Bella."_

_"Do you understand now?"_

_"You are a fucking amazing mother, Bella. Don't ever doubt that," Riley comforted._

_"I'm supposed to see his parents on Wednesday night. They are flying in tomorrow."_

_"What are you going to tell them?"_

_"The truth I suppose. I'm going to try and convince my dad to come with me so they don't kill me and bury me in the backyard."_

_Riley chuckled and I couldn't help but smile. "What can I do, baby?"_

_"Come down and take care of Charlie for me? Normally Jake and Billy would do it, but they have some tribal meeting on Wednesday and they usually get high and shit."_

_"Really? Is that legal?"_

_"On the Rez, yes. They smoke this pipe thing. I don't know, but I don't want Charlie around it."_

_"I'll be there."_

_"You're the best, Ri, I'll book you a hotel room at the Forks Motel."_

_"I'm not staying with you? We're adults, Bella. Your dad should be cool with it."_

_"First of all, I share a bedroom with my three year old son, Riley. Not just a bedroom, but a fucking bed. And even if we could temporarily find some other place for him, my dad is like 10 feet away. He may sleep like a log, but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't be able to sleep through the over the top moaning and wall-banging that you're so fond of."_

_"Gotcha! Forks Motel it is."_

_"That's what I thought. You can be here Wednesday afternoon?"_

_"I'll be there."_

_"Thanks, Riley, Love ya."_

_"I love you too Baby."_

_I hung up and relaxed a little. Both big and little Charlies were asleep and I was ready to join them. I went into my room and lay down gently next to my sleeping baby. He looked so angelic. His long eyelashes were fluttering against his cheeks and a small smile played gently on his full lips. I wrapped my arm around him and let his calm rush over me. And then I fell asleep._

_XXXXXX_

Now I was sitting across the kitchen table from my father, begging for him to be my bodyguard.

Not that I thought Carlisle and Esme would actually physically harm me, but it never hurts to have the Chief of Police on your side when revealing a secret such as mine.

Charlie sighed. "Okay, Bells, I'll come with you. What time?"

"Seven o'clock. I'll tell Alice."

Once Dad left, I flipped open my phone.

**Dad's coming with me. Hope that's okay. ~B~**

A few minutes later my phone vibrated.

**That's great. I told my parents you were coming for dinner. They're really excited to see you again. ~A~**

**That's because they don't know what's coming. ~B~**

I hit send and shook my head. This was going to be a fucking nightmare.

**Seriously Bella. We'll all make it through this. ~A~**

Alice, always the optomist.

**I'm scared Alice. ~B~**

**If you're scared of my parents, how are you going to handle Edward? ~A~**

Fuck, I wasn't even ready to think about that. I'd spent the first year of Charlie's life trying to imagine how I would tell him and the next two swearing that I never would.

**Jesus Christ, I'm not ready to go there yet. ~B~**

**He knows my parents are here. He's getting antsy. ~A~**

So not what I wanted to hear.

**I'll see you tonight. ~B~**

**At 7. ~A~**

I set down my phone and leaned back in my chair arching my back and listening to it pop. I heard tiny little feet flapping down the stairs just before a messy little shock of bronze hair appeared in the kitchen.

"Hi, Mommy," he said sleepily. He looked up at me and smiled sweetly.

"Hi, baby, you hungry?"

Charlie grinned "Pancakes?" he asked enthusiastically.

"I can do that." I stood up and grabbed the OJ from the counter top. I placed it into a CARS sippy cup and handed it to him.

"Fank you," he sighed as he took a big swig.

"Go cuddle up on the couch, I'll turn on some cartoons while I make your pancakes okay."

He nodded.

"Oh, and Riley's coming to visit today."

That got his attention. "Reawy?"

"Yup. Grampa and I are going out tonight and Riley's going to take care of you."

His face broke out into a wide grin and his shoulders rose to his ears in an excited shrug. He flopped himself on the couch happily and pulled an old fleece blanket over his lap to watch his shows.

XXXXX

At 3:15 in the afternoon I got a text.

**Open the door.**

I grinned.

**How do I know there's not some pervert out there waiting to attack me? ~B~**

**You don't.**

**Why should I open the door then? ~B~**

**Get your fucking ass to the front door and open it before I start big bad wolfing your shit.**

I bounded, yes bounded, over to the door and threw it open. I couldn't even focus before I was lifted up and twirled around by big warm arms. He set me down and kissed me roughly on the mouth. I pulled back. I was so happy to see him. He was my support system; my best friend. He made me smile and laugh even when I didn't really want to.

"God it's good to see you," Riley beamed. "Where's my little man?"

"I made him go take a nap. With you babysitting tonight I thought it would be a good idea."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Riley asked trying to play innocent.

"That means that every time you babysit, you feed him tons of sugar and rile him up so much that he can't sleep. Then he passes out wherever he falls at eleven and is really fucking cranky the next morning. "

"Hey, I'm just preparing him for his college years."

"He's three, Riley. He's got fifteen years to prepare himself for college. Whatever, that's why he's napping."

"So….we're alone?" He gave me a mischievous smile.

"No, we're not alone. But we've got about half hour before I go wake him up."

"Half hour, Bella, I can have you in absolute ecstasy in 15 minutes."

"I am not having sex with you in my father's living room Riley Carter."

His smile faded and he gave me puppy dog eyes. FUCKING PUPPY DOG EYES.

"No. You have to wait." I was trying to be firm, but I knew what I was going to be up against that evening and part of me felt the urge to release a little tension. Even so, I wasn't going there, not just then.

"That's so unfair, Bella. I come all the way here and don't even get a proper kiss?"

I stood in front of him and lifted myself up on my toes. Riley's not huge, 5'10" or so, but I'm only 5'4" so pretty much everyone requires me to tippy toe it if I want to actually look into their eyes. I wrapped one hand around his neck and he grinned at me. Then I sucked his bottom lip into my mouth before moving to his upper lip. I tilted my head and plunged my tongue into his mouth. He kissed me back furiously before I pulled back. His eyes were wide. I didn't often give him kisses like that, but I was so appreciative of him helping me, that I couldn't resist. I knew it would make him happy.

"Now that's what I'm fucking talking about, baby." Riley smacked my ass as we headed to the couch to chat.

XXXXXXX

Seven o'clock came way too fast. I was sitting with Dad outside of the Cullen's house again.

"I don't think I can do this," I said nervously. My hands were in my lap and I could see them shaking.

"Sure you can, Bells," my dad, patting my knee.

"I know you don't like it when I use foul language, Dad, but I'm really fucking scared. If they don't take it well, how in the hell is Edward going to take it?"

"You said Alice understood. Who's to say that Carlisle and Esme won't?" he said, attempting to be the voice of reason in hopes of calming me down.

"Alice understands because she knows the details Dad. I'm not going into the details with his parents. I just can't do that."

Dad was quiet for a few more minutes. "Let's just see how this plays out, Bella. Don't get yourself worked up about it just yet. Come on, it's past seven, it's rude to be late."

I stepped out of the car, pulling my hoodie tightly around me to fend off the cooler evening air. I didn't even have to ring the bell this time before Alice was opening the door. She hugged my dad who blushed furiously before stepping inside.

We removed our shoes and Dad walked in front of us as Alice held me back.

"They know something is up," she warned.

"What did you tell them?"

"Nothing, Bella. I didn't tell them anything, but they can see it in my eyes. I can't hide from my mom. She keeps asking me if you are okay."

"Well, I'm not okay. I'm the farthest thing from okay Alice," I whisper-yelled.

"I know, sweetie, just remember that Jasper and I are here to support you okay? We'll help them understand."

I wasn't convinced. I sighed as we entered the kitchen. My dad was already chatting with Esme and Carlisle was in the fridge pulling out a beer. He handed it to my Dad and they toasted each other before they noticed me standing there. Esme's eyes raked over me and she smiled hesitantly. When she was satisfied, she swooped in and crushed me to her. She smelled of cinnamon and vanilla. I unconsciously inhaled her and let her scent envelope me in calm.

"Bella darling, it has been way too long. Why didn't you ever come and visit?"

"Things were really busy for me out here. I've only been away once since I started college." I glanced nervously over at my dad who was trying to stifle a cough.

Carlisle was next, hugging me tightly to him. He smelled of pipe tobacco and mint. It was an oddly arousing smell. I stepped back just as Jasper entered the room. He threw his arms over both Alice's and my shoulder and nodded a hello to my dad.

Most of the night was fairly carefree. We talked and laughed about various things that had occurred in their absence. Of course, we were careful not to mention Charlie in any of the stories. They entertained us with stories of their "Money Pit." in Boston. We were actually rolling around on the carpet in laughter when Esme told us about Emmett crashing through a floorboard and getting his leg stuck. He yelled for an hour while unbeknownst to him, Esme, Alice, and Rosalie, laughed their asses off at him from the ground floor. Just like the fucking movie. Priceless.

Carlisle got up and started a fire in the fireplace while Esme refilled wine glasses as we all started coming down from our laughing high. It was much quieter and I started to stare off into space.

"Bella?" Esme's voice called to me softly.

I looked up at her and our eyes met.

"Is everything okay? I mean, it's wonderful to see you both again, but I get the sense that there's something wrong."

I glanced over at my dad who just nodded at me. Alice was bouncing nervously and Jasper was trying very hard to calm her.

_Shit, it's now or never. Considering never isn't an option anymore. . . I guess it's now._

"Uh, well. I mean, everything is okay. I'm okay that is," I stumbled over my words. I could feel my heartbeat speeding up and I swallowed thickly. Carlisle had rejoined Esme on the couch and they were both looking at me.

_Suck it up and just fucking tell them Bella_

"I have something to tell you both. I….I don't know how you're going to take it."

"Sweetheart, we….."

I shook my head. "Esme, I… please don't. Please just wait until I get this out."

She nodded and I saw Carlisle's hand tighten on her shoulder. Alice was right, they certainly knew something was wrong.

Alice stood up from her spot next to Jasper and sat next to me, taking my hand in hers.

"Mom, Dad, please just hear her out before you make any rash judgments."

"What is going on?" Esme nearly choked.

"I, uh, I have a son," I choked out.

Esme gasped a little and then let out a huge breath. "Oh Bella."

I held up my hand. "Please, Esme, please don't hate me. I never intended for this to happen." My breath was heavy and I knew the tears were coming.

"He's Edward's." At the moment the words escaped my lips I let out a shuddering sob.

I could hear both Esme and Carlisle suck massive quantities of air into their lungs.

"What?" Carlisle's voice bellowed. Esme just sat there staring at me.

Jasper jumped up and joined Alice and me, wrapping one of his large hands around my free hand and placing the other on my shoulder. I saw Carlisle look at my dad and my dad just nodded affirmatively.

"What are you talking about, Bella? " Carlisle asked a little softer. I could hear the tension in his voice, but I knew he was trying to remain calm. I closed my eyes to steady myself before I started explaining.

"I have a little boy named Charlie. Charles Anthony Swan. He's three. He is Edward's child. He's your grandchild."

"How…how is that possible?" he asked incredulously.

I lifted my eyebrows at him.

"That's not what I meant, Bella. I know how babies are made," he scoffed. "I just don't understand how it's Edward's. You two never dated did you?"

I shook my head no.

"_He_….. is Edward's. We weren't dating. It was an accident."

"Are you sure he's Edward's? I mean. I don't mean to insinuate anything Bella, but could he be someone else's?"

Thank God he got my point about Charlie being a he and not an it, because had he done it again I would have called him out.

Alice, Jasper, my dad and I all started chuckling at the same time. Not funny chuckling, more like 'oh, they have no idea' chuckling. My dad spoke up.

"I am completely torn between being offended at you calling my daughter a slut and completely amused by the absurdity of it."

"Look, Chief, I mean no offense, but really, how are we supposed to know?"

"How are we supposed to know?" my dad scoffed loudly. "Do you even know how many girls I saw that boy of yours with? I mean, if we're going to compare reputations, I have some stories for you. It was only a matter of time before he knocked someone up. Unfortunately it was my daughter who fell victim to him." My dad's voice was scratchy. He was pissed and trying very hard not to let his full wrath out on his old friend.

Carlisle and Esme looked stunned.

I wanted to correct my father. I wasn't Edward's victim and he knew that, but right now, he wasn't in the mood.

Instead I shook my head. "I was a virgin, Carlisle. There was no one else before the pregnancy, certainly no one during it, and no one for a long time following it."

"Again, Bella. You say it, but…"

"Dad, don't." Alice interjected.

"Excuse me?" Carlisle was surprised at Alice's curt tone.

"Dad, he's the spitting image of Edward. When I ran into them in the grocery store, Bella didn't even have to say a word. I knew from the second I laid eyes on that boy, that he was Edward's."

I saw Carlisle's eyes dart to Jasper and I could feel Jasper nodding behind me. "It's like looking at Edward twenty years ago. It's very odd," he said quietly.

"I saw it when she brought him home for his first birthday," Dad mumbled.

"You didn't know?" Carlisle asked softly.

"No. She refused to tell me who the father was. I didn't see it at Christmas, he still looked like just a baby to me, but when she brought him back in April, she didn't even have to tell me."

XXXXX

It had been five months since I had been home and in that time Charlie had gone from looking like a generic baby with a somewhat bald head and bluish eyes to looking exactlylike his father. His hair had grown and was a mass of wild and unruly bronze and his eyes had changed to a deep emerald green. He had lost a lot of baby fat when he started walking, which was immediately followed by running. His face was starting to thin out and you could see that he would have a strong jaw one day. It took me at least ten minutes of sitting in the car to build up the courage.

_"Maybe he won't notice." I thought to myself. " Maybe he won't remember Edward enough to see the resemblance."_

_I hadn't told my dad who Charlie's father was because I knew that he would try to find Carlisle. Between me and the people he had to bring into the ER after an arrest, he and Carlisle had seen enough of each other to build somewhat of a friendship._

_A knock on my car window startled me from my thoughts._

_"You planning on coming in any time soon, Bells?" I heard Dad ask through the glass._

_I opened up my car door. "Sorry, Dad, lost in thought."_

_I pulled Charlie's infant seat from the car and covered him with a blanket. He was sleeping soundly so I still had a few minutes before I unveiled him._

_"I think it's time for a bigger seat don't you?" my dad asked, looking at Charlie's little toes peeking out over the bottom of the car seat._

_I nodded. "We have his one year old check up next week. I just want to get the okay from the pediatrician before I switch him."_

_My dad smiled at me. " You're a good mom, Bella. I'm proud of you."_

_I stared at my dad for a minute before breaking out into a wide grin. "Thanks." I didn't often hear compliments, but they were even more rare coming from my father._

_We made our way inside and sat down. Dad asked about school and work and how Charlie was doing. He was surprised to know that he was already walking and said he couldn't wait to see it. Little did he know he'd be chasing that kid around for years to come._

_When Charlie finally stirred I lifted the blanket from his carrier, unbuckled him, and pulled him out. I went back to sit down with my son in my lap and my dad just stared at me completely slack jawed. I knew then and there that he had noticed._

_"Can you say hi to Grampa?" I cooed at Charlie._

_Still my father said nothing. Charlie squirmed on my lap and I pulled out a bottle from his diaper bag. He sucked at it greedily. And still my dad was silent._

_"Oh shit Dad, just say something," I breathed._

_"Edward Cullen, Bella?"_

_This time it was my turn to be silent._

_"Whe….Ho…. Dammit, Bella, are you kidding me?"_

_I bit my lip and looked down at my baby. "I haven't said anything yet so no, I'm not kidding you," I said petulantly._

_"Is Edward Cullen Charlie's father, Bella?" my dad asked me bluntly._

_I nodded just once, but it was enough._

_"Well that little shit couldn't have told Carlisle, because there is no way that he wouldn't have forced Edward to take responsibility," my dad roared angrily. " I knew he was no good. I caught him in precarious positions with more than one girl and not one of them was that supposed girlfriend of his," he grumbled. And then he stopped._

_"Isabella Marie Swan, I thought you would have known better than that. You were around him all the time, you saw what he was like. How could you possibly have let him take advantage of you? And you let him walk away?"_

_"Daddy? The Cullen's don't know. None of them know."_

_It took my dad a few seconds to realize what I was saying, but the aftermath was not pretty._

_He spent the next half hour lecturing me about how wrong it was of me to keep this from them and I spent the following two days convincing my father not to locate and tell them. In the end, he bowed to my wishes._

XXXXXX

Now, as we sat in the Cullen's living room, I was feeling a bit of relief that the knowledge was actually out there.

No one spoke for a good 10 minutes. Esme had yet to utter a single word to me. I kept my head down until I heard her clear her throat. I looked back up at her and met her eyes. They were no longer warm and kind, but instead held fear and confusion.

"Does Edward know?" she asked in an almost whisper.

I shook my head. "You guys left before I even found out."

"And you didn't think to try and contact us?" Carlisle was angry. Very angry.

"I was afraid. Edward and I weren't really even friends."

"Apparently you were friends enough to jump into bed together."

"It wasn't like that Carlisle. It was an accident."

"Bella, I'm a doctor. Do you really think I'm going to believe that my son's penis accidentally penetrated you long enough to ejaculate?"

I saw my father's face scrunch up in horror. He stood up quickly.

"Carlisle, I'm trying very hard not to take offense at what you are saying about my daughter. Regardless of the situation or the decisions she made, she _is_ not and _was_ not a slut. Your son took advantage of her and she had every right to be afraid of him. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get some air," he ground out.

"I'll go with you, Chief." Jasper jumped up and followed my dad outside.

"Dad, please," Alice interjected again. "I have heard the whole story. Bella is certainly not to blame here."

Esme gasped. "Oh my God."

We all turned to face her.

"Oh my God."

"What's the matter, sweetheart?" Carlisle's tone changed quickly as he worried about his wife.

Once again her eyes met mine. "Bella, did Edward…..did Edward?"

"Did Edward what, sweetheart?"

"Did Edward force himself on you?"

I hesitated just long enough to see Esme's heart break. I mean, yes, he had kind of forced himself on me, at first, but I was more than a willing participant for rest of the whole experience. I had wanted him, I had always wanted him.

"That little fucker!" Carlisle's face was scarlet. Alice looked at me in horror.

"Oh my God Bella!" she squealed, begging me to clarify.

"No. Jesus, no he didn't rape me. God. I'm sorry," I gasped, shocked that they would even think that he could do something like that.

Carlisle's emotions were all over the place. The poor guy was going to have a heart attack if he kept reacting before the whole story was out.

He tried to calm himself back down, but his brow remained furrowed. "Why did you hesitate then, Bella?"

"It was….unexpected. I never intended….but he initiated. At first I was just plain scared, but I never resisted him. I never told him no. And he gave me the chance to say no. He practically begged me to say no, but I didn't. I told him to do it. We weren't exactly, uh…sober. And we certainly weren't thinking clearly."

"Obviously," Carlisle grunted.

Everyone took deep breaths.

"Why on earth did you keep this from us?" Esme's voice remained quiet, but I could tell that pure unadulterated fury was brewing just below the surface. " Why on earth would you have that child and not even give us the chance to be his family? Why would you not tell Edward that he had a son? And how the FUCK," Carlisle, Alice and I all flinched at Esme's use of the word. She was yelling now, "could you possibly let that child keep believing that he didn't have a father or more family that gave a shit about him?" Esme was practically shaking with anger, but I had had enough.

"And what would you have had me do Esme? Call up Edward and say 'by the way, our drunken one night stand made a baby and regardless of what you want, I'm going to have it. Screw you and have a nice fucking day.' I mean really, what were my options? He would have tried to get me to have an abortion and then what? I was trying to let him go on and live his life. We never loved each other, hell, I'm not even sure we ever really like each other. He wasn't gentle or loving. He ripped me apart from the inside out and left me there without so much as a goodbye. I woke up in his bed scared and alone and in pain. And as much as I asked him for it, I was not about to hold him to me. If I could have continued to raise my son without Edward ever knowing of his existence, I would have. The only reason I'm sitting here right now is that I promised Alice I wouldn't run. God knows that I've thought about it enough. Take my baby and run as far away as I can possibly get. I'm not asking for anything from any of you."

I stood up on my somewhat numb feet and stumbled towards the door. I didn't quite make it before I felt strong hands on my arms. Carlisle pulled me to him in a tight embrace. I started crying. Not just crying, downright sobbing. I felt two more arms wrapping around me and smelled vanilla and cinnamon as Esme joined us.

"Oh God Bella," Carlisle choked. "I'm so sorry he did that to you. I'm so sorry that we didn't make you feel comfortable enough to come to us."

I nodded mutely.

"You have to understand that this is a shock to us. We knew Edward wasn't perfect, but we never. . ." he swallowed thickly. "We never could have imagined that he could have hurt you, of all people, Bella. I didn't mean to insinuate that you were a. . . " He didn't finish his sentence. He didn't need to.

I couldn't speak. I just let the sobs roll from my chest, the tears soaking into Carlisle's shirt. His hands were caressing the back of my head and eventually I was calm enough to stop crying. I pulled away reluctantly and looked at the clock. 10:48.

"I have to get home. Poor Riley's probably still trying to peel Charlie off the walls."

"Who's Riley?" Alice and Esme asked in unison.

"He's my, um, my boyfriend? And my best friend. He looks after Charlie whenever there's something I need to do."

_That's right Bella, no need to elaborate on that whole relationship._

Carlisle and Esme looked at each other, but didn't say anything else. I could see the questions in their eyes. Edward had been denied the opportunity to be a part of his son's life and I was allowing another man to play that role. I wasn't really, but they didn't know that. Regardless, I didn't feel like my relationship with Riley was any of their business anyway.

I grabbed my coat and purse and slipped on my shoes. My dad was still outside with Jasper, but they were far enough from the house that I didn't worry about him hearing any of the gory details about my night with Edward.

"Can we see him?" Esme called out as I started to walk towards the car.

I turned to face her.

"Of course you can, Esme. It's just….you have to understand that he doesn't know who you are. You're going to have to give him time."

Esme nodded.

"I take him to Tillicum Park on Thursday mornings. Rain or shine, we're there from nine-thirty to eleven thirty. Alice, it might be a good idea if you come too."

Alice smiled weakly at me, but nodded.

I suppose I shouldn't have been surprised. I had spared Alice the emotional details of the story. Now it was out there. She was pasty white. They all were. Jasper reached for my hand and kissed my knuckles as I climbed into the car and I smiled warmly at him.

"Thank you, Jasper," I said softly, appreciating the fact that he had rescued my father and me from an uncomfortable situation.

"My pleasure, sugar."

Dad was already buckled up and I hit the gas, watching them all disappear in the rear view mirror.

If I thought that was hard, how was I ever going to confront Edward?

XXXXXXXX

**AN: So what did you think about Alice and Jasper's meeting of Little C? How about Carlisle and Esme's reaction? Was it what you thought it would be?**

**I love hearing your thoughts.**

**NEXT CHAPTER: A few more Cullens return to Forks.**

**Recs: Please remember that my recs are stories that _I_ enjoy enough to pass along, but everyone has different tastes.**

**For the Summer by camoozle: This story follows Edward and Bella through 17 years of friendship starting when they were just 11 and 12. Bella's dad owns a marina in Arizona and Edward's family visits every summer from Seattle. This story really just made me happy (and occasionally sad and frustrated as well). And…It's nearly complete.**

**Hate Me by xrxdanixrx: "Awkward Bella only had a crush on one guy, known for stringing girls along. When he rejected Bella's advances, her world flipped inside out. Years later, she's now the female version of the catalyst that changed her life. And it's her turn for payback." **


	4. Parks and Recreation

**AN: Okay, so for those of you reading for the first time, you won't notice any difference, but for those re-reading, you might notice slight changes here and there, but nothing big. **

**Thank you to everyone who continues to review. I read and value every single one. **

**Thank you to Mollie, who is ever so wonderful in helping me stylistically mesh these early chapters with the later ones. **

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyers owns it. **

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 3: Parks and Recreation

We got home from the Cullen's place at about quarter after eleven. I couldn't help but grin as I walked into the living room.

Riley was passed out on the sofa with Charlie curled up in a little ball on his chest. They were covered by a thick fleece blanket and some 24-hour news channel was on the television. One of Riley's arms was tucked around Charlie, while the other was dangling off the edge of the couch and onto the floor; the remote still firmly in his grasp.

"I have to say, Bella, as much as I give you a hard time about this putz, he's not a bad guy," my dad said as he too, took in the sight.

"I know, Dad," I whispered.

"I'll see you in the morning, Bells," he mumbled, dragging his feet heavily towards his bedroom.

"Night."

I carefully lifted Charlie up so that I could put him in bed. He squirmed a bit before wrapping himself around me and nuzzling into the crook of my neck. Riley's eyes fluttered open.

"How'd it go?" he asked sleepily.

"I'll tell you in a minute, let me just get him down."

I climbed the stairs and set Charlie down in our bed, pulling the covers over him. When I returned back downstairs Riley was sitting up, rubbing his eyes.

"What time is it?" he yawned.

"Eleven-thirty."

"Jesus, baby, I should get going."

"Do you want some company?" I asked coyly.

Riley's eyes lit up like any other man's eyes do when you even hint around having sex. "Do you even have to ask?"

"I can't stay, but I'll come visit for a while." Riley grinned and kissed my mouth chastely before jumping up, pulling me towards the door.

He followed me to the Forks Motel. We barely made it to the door before clothes were flying, lips were smacking, and moans were echoing through the room. He carefully leaned me backwards onto the bed. I was naked and it was cold, but in an instant he was on top of me. Riley wasn't the best sex in the world, but he certainly enjoyed it, which made me enjoy it. I had never had mind-blowing sex before. I had painful sex (I give you one guess who that one was), boring sex, hurried sex, good sex, and just plain bad sex, but with each experience I had learned a little bit more. Riley was the good sex and that kept me satisfied, for now. I never really anticipated a future with Riley. We were still best friends. We loved each other. We promised each other that if it ever wasn't working for either one of us; if either one of us had extreme emotions in either direction or if anyone else entered the picture, it would end. He made me happy, and he made Charlie happy.

Afterwards, we lay wrapped around each other in bed and I replayed the evening for him. It still amazed me that I survived relatively intact. Regardless of my belief in my fantastic reasoning, I had to agree that keeping Carlisle and Esme away from their grandchild was a shitty thing to do.

They were kind and caring people and their support was going to mean a lot to me in the very near future.

I returned home at about two in the morning and plummeted into my bed. Charlie groaned and rolled over, but didn't wake. I slipped off my pants and just slept in my t-shirt and underwear.

It crossed my mind, just before I fell asleep, that I was going to need to find my own place soon.

Charlie was getting used to this co-sleeping arrangement and I wasn't sure it was completely healthy for him to do it every night. And as much as I loved having my dad around and cuddling with my little boy, it was eventually going to put a cramp in any kind of a sex life that I might possibly want. Not to mention the serious lack of personal space.

I woke up at eight to the sound of my son's hysterical giggling echoing down the hallway. I stretched and padded my way down the stairs. When I reached the bottom I stood and watched as Riley had Charlie pinned to the ground and was tickling his ribs. I chuckled at the sight and Riley looked up at me, his lips twisting upwards into a grin.

"Uh, Bella?" I jumped at the sound of my dad's voice. He was never home this late in the morning. "I realize that you're an adult and all, but don't you think that clothes might be a good idea?" My dad was still behind his newspaper at the kitchen table as I looked down. I still only had on my t-shirt and a pair of black cotton boy shorts.

_Whoops._

"Oh, Shit. Sorry, Dad, I didn't even realize."

Riley winked at me as I started to turn around to head back to my bedroom. I heard Charlie start laughing again and assumed that Riley had resumed his tickle assault.

I quickly showered and pulled on a pair of black Capri pants and a pink t-shirt with a picture of a kid's big wheels on it that said '_That's How I Roll_'. Always appropriate for a play date at the park with my three year old. I snagged my flip flops and bounced back downstairs.

"I'm freaking starving," I chirped as I poured myself a cup of coffee. "What are you doing home, Dad?"

My dad put down his newspaper and looked at me.

"Nice t-shirt, Bells," he smiled. "Since we were out so late last night…." He raised his eyebrows at me in that '_I know what you did last night_' look. "I figured I would go in a little later this morning.

I blushed a little at the idea of my father knowing what I had been up to, but I tried to play it off.

"Cool," I smiled, grabbing a banana and sitting down across from him.

"Going to the park today?"

"It's Thursday," I said as an explanation. "I think the Cullen's are going to join us this morning."

My dad just nodded. Riley flopped down in the chair next to me, looking tired.

"I gotta get going, Bella. I just stopped in to say goodbye, I have class this afternoon."

"Thanks, Ri. I'll walk you out."

"See you later, Chief Swan," Riley said, raising his hand in a half wave.

"Uh huh!" Dad grunted, not looking up.

"Hey, stinkpants, get down here and give me a cuddle, I'm leaving."

I saw a blur of blue jeans and red shirt as Charlie flew at Riley who lifted him effortlessly over his head and threw him into the air. He pulled him close and gave him a hug.

"Take care of your mama, big man."

"Okay, Riwey."

He set Charlie down and he was away again just as quickly as he had appeared.

I walked Riley to the door and he took my chin in his hand. "You gonna be okay?"

I nodded. "Eventually. I suppose I always knew this was coming. I hoped it wouldn't, but I kind of knew that I was constantly living on the edge. It was only a matter of time before I fell off."

"You know I'm here for you. Always. Call me if you need me." I smiled at him and reached up to kiss him. He kissed me tenderly before wrapping me up into a tight embrace. My little arms snaked around his waist and I held him to me.

"I'll give you a call later," he whispered.

I just nodded, my head buried in his chest. He let me go and jumped into his white Camaro, which I so affectionately called '_the bachelor mobile_'.

When I went back inside my dad was packing up.

"I gotta go, Bells. You'll be okay?"

_Why is everyone always asking me the same fucking question?_

"I'll be fine, Dad, thanks," I grumbled.

He headed out through the garage. When Charlie was born I insisted that my dad keep his guns in a combination locker in the garage. I'm pretty sure that when we were living in Seattle he still left his gun belt hanging from the coat rack, but since moving back in, he had religiously locked them up every night. I never even saw them anymore unless I stopped by the station.

"Charlie, you ready for the park?" In bounded the blur once again and I locked up as he climbed into the car.

XXXXXXX

It was just after nine when we got to the park, but it was already getting kind of warm. The sky was blue with only a scatter of clouds. Charlie squealed when I let him out of the car and bolted towards the giant plastic and metal castle. It was always nice to know that the playground equipment wasn't going to land my child in the hospital. I remember living with my mom in Arizona and even in May you could scald your butt on those plastic slides.

There was another woman there with two kids. She sat on the side opposite from me and seemed completely absorbed by her cell phone. Charlie was hiding in an alcove with one of the other kids when I heard footsteps. A gentle hand touched my shoulder and I looked up to see Esme. She had sunglasses on so I couldn't see her eyes, but I smiled at her and saw Carlisle and Alice walking up behind her.

"Hi, Bella," Carlisle smiled gently at me.

He and Esme both seemed nervous. I suppose when meeting your grandchild for the first time, one has a right to be a little nervous; especially when you just found out about him twelve hours ago.

_Fuck, what have I done? No grandparent should ever have to do this._

Alice sat down next to me and grabbed my hand.

"You ready for this?"

I'd already done the hard part, what else was there to be ready for. . . today?

I shrugged. "Where's Jasper?"

"Job interview in Port Angeles this morning. He wanted to be here."

"It's okay Alice."

"Awice!"

We all looked up as Charlie squealed loudly and came racing towards us. I heard Esme gasp as Charlie flung himself into Alice's open arms.

"Did you come to pway with me?" he grinned.

"Of course I did, sweetie." Alice grabbed his hand and led him back towards the playground.

"Holy Shit!" Carlisle said under his breath.

"Still doubting me, Carlisle?" I asked smugly. He sat down next to me and Esme sat on the other side of me, grasping my hand tightly.

"Oh, Bella. I am so sorry."

I shook my head. "Don't worry about it. I suppose it was a fair question, not knowing the situation."

"It's like deja vu." Esme whispered. "I mean, how is that even possible?"

"I did give birth to him I promise." I laughed.

They were quiet for a few minutes as we watched Alice pushing Charlie on the swing and trying to teach him how to pump his legs.

"Bella?" Esme said looking at me.

"Huh?" I asked lazily.

"Was anyone with you?" she asked softly.

"When?" I asked, furrowing my brow. I wasn't exactly sure what she was asking.

"When he was born?"

_Oh._

I hesitated. I knew that I did not have the answer that she wanted to hear.

"Uh, no, not really. I called my dad on my way to the hospital, after my water broke. I was in Seattle. He got there about an hour after Charlie was born."

I heard Esme sniffle and she slid a tissue under her dark glasses.

"I had a couple of friends, sort of, but it was the middle of the night and I didn't really want to bother anyone."

"You drove yourself to the hospital while you were in labor?" Carlisle looked at me in complete shock.

I just shrugged. "I was okay. It started out slow, but once I got to the hospital my labor was actually pretty fast. He was almost two weeks overdue. They were worried that he was going to be huge and wanted to induce me, but I wanted to get through finals. Most of my professors let me take them early so that I could focus on him and not worry about my classes."

Esme nodded, her eyes still on Charlie and her hand still holding mine softly.

"Can I do the twenty questions thing?" she asked hopefully.

I laughed. "Sure. Of course. I can imagine you have a lot of questions."

"I probably have more than twenty, but now that we know. . ." she looked at me, her eyes flashing with both sadness and a hint of agitation. "Well, I'm sure there are a lot of things to learn about him; and you."

I swallowed nervously. I had this fear that once Esme and Carlisle really processed the situation, they wouldn't be so understanding.

Esme looked back at Charlie. "So, when is his birthday?"

"April eleventh."

Carlisle immediately pulled out his iPhone, probably entering the date.

"How big was he?" she asked, smiling as Charlie dodged around Alice in their game of chase.

"9 pounds 1 ounce. 22 inches long." I grimaced a little, remembering every second of getting him out.

Carlisle's mouth dropped. Esme gasped. "Oh my God, Bella, how is that even possible, you're tiny?"

I snorted. "It wasn't exactly pleasant. I didn't want an epidural so they gave me that narcotic stuff. I remember the pain, but to be completely honest, I was so high I didn't really care. I actually accused the doctor of being a 'sadistic motherfucker'. Excuse my language."

I blushed. Carlisle chuckled.

Alice left Charlie to play with a little girl who had just arrived with her mother and rejoined us.

"Will you come back to the house for lunch?" she asked cheerfully. "Jasper should be back by then."

"Yes, Bella, please come," Esme said as she nodded her head.

I looked over at Charlie who seemed to be torturing the little girl who was running away and scream-giggling. I saw him tug on her ponytail and I frowned.

"Charlie, can you come here please," I called out.

He came skipping up and used my knees as leverage to jump up and down. Kicking his feet up behind him like a donkey.

"First of all, be nice to that little girl," I scolded. "If you're mean to her she won't want to play with you."

Charlie nodded at me seriously.

"Secondly," I said as I grabbed his hands. "This is Carlisle and Esme. They are Alice's mom and dad."

"Hi," Charlie grinned, not stopping his bouncing.

"Would you like to go back to their house for lunch? Maybe visit with Jasper again."

"Sure." Still bouncing. "Do you have macaroni and cheese?"

"I'm sure I can come up with something," Esme smiled.

"Okay." Charlie took one more bounce and then turned around and raced back up the play structure, heading for the curly slide and the little girl standing at the top. We all watched as he grinned at the little girl and then promptly jumped in front of her to slide first.

I huffed and shook my head before returning my attention to Esme.

"I'll stop by my dad's house and grab some photos before we head over. I think I might have a few videos as well if you'd like to see them."

"That would be great, Bella. I would love to see them," Esme assured. Her voice was soft, but she couldn't hide her excitement as her face lit up and a smile spread from ear to ear.

We spent another hour and a half watching Charlie play, each taking our turn to chase him, push him on the swing, or catch him from the '_super fast_' slide. I told them about each milestone and about the time he broke his arm after falling off a rock down at First Beach when he was two. Jake had been watching him and he was absolutely devastated. I'm not sure who was crying more at the hospital, Charlie or Jake.

We finally got up to go and I carried Charlie to the car on my back. We rushed home and I managed to find a box of photographs that was stashed on the top shelf in my closet. I didn't find the videos, but I figured those could wait. This was going to be an overwhelming day for Carlisle and Esme as it was.

When we pulled up in front of the Cullen's house, for the third time in just a few days, I was a lot less tense. Charlie and I walked up to the house and I lifted him up to ring the doorbell. Esme answered the door with Alice right behind her.

"Bella, stop ringing the doorbell," Alice scolded.

"I didn't ring the bell, Charlie did. And it's the highlight of his day," I said, kissing him on the cheek and setting him down. He burst through the door.

"Here we go," Alice giggled.

"What?" Esme asked.

"Music room, Mom. He's headed to the music room."

We all followed Charlie. Carlisle was just coming out of his office at the end of the hallway and met us in the doorway. We all stood quietly as Charlie began his routine.

"Oh," Esme gasped.

She and Carlisle appeared to be mesmerized by what they were watching. We hadn't been there more than half an hour when a loud voice boomed through the living room and down the hallway.

"We're home."

"Oh Shit," Alice yelped.

Panic plastered itself on my face and Alice put her arm around me. "It's only Emmett, sweetie." She wrinkled her nose. "But I do think that soon as Edward hears we're all here and he's not, he'll high-tail it home."

Home? Is that what this was for them? Were they planning on staying? Too many questions were plaguing my mind. I wasn't ready for this.

"Where are you people? I know you're home."

Alice, Jasper, Carlisle and I walked into the living room, leaving Esme on the piano bench with Charlie. The large frame of Emmett Cullen came into view. His longtime girlfriend Rosalie was right behind him.

"Well Fucking A, little Bella Swan is all growed up. You look amazing, doll!" With that, he swooped me up into a bone-crushing hug.

"Uh, Emmett. You're cutting off my air supply," I gasped. He set me down gently and grinned.

"Hey, Bella," Rosalie flashed me a quick smile and then moved on to Carlisle, Jasper, and Alice.

"Did you know that Rosalie's my wife now, Bella?" Emmett grinned.

"I didn't, congratulations."

"Yup. The most amazing eighteen months of my entire life."

"Emmett, you guys have been together for eight years," Alice chided.

"Yeah, but for most of those we had to sneak around to have sex."

Rosalie let go of Jasper to smack Emmett on the back of the head.

"Ow. So what brings you around, little Bella? Didn't you go to college or something?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I graduated in May and moved back in with my dad. I'm trying to figure a few things out before I get a _grown up_ job."

"Aren't we all?" Emmett snickered. "So what did you graduate in?"

"I have a BA in Psychology with a minor in English Literature. I'm considering going back for my Masters in Child and Adolescent Psych though. Maybe a PhD. I don't know really."

"Wow, that's pretty cool."

Just then, there was a loud bang from the piano.

"Well shit, I didn't know Edward was here too. Let's go see the bastard." Emmett took off down the hallway before any of us could stop him.

"Emmett wait," Carlisle called out, but it was too late. He was standing in the doorway, his mouth practically hitting the floor when we reached him.

"Holy motherfu…."

"Emmett!" Esme scolded before he could finish his sentence.

Rosalie appeared behind us trying to figure out what had us all so riled up.

"Sorry, Mommy. I swipped," Charlie squeaked.

"Uh, Mommy?" Emmett looked around at us.

"I'm sorry, Bella," Esme looked at me sadly.

Emmett's eyes rested on me and I could feel Rosalie boring holes into the back of my head.

"I gotta be missing something here," Emmett was wide eyed. "Cause, that kid looks exactly like my little brother."

I sighed. "I can't do this again guys. I just can't. Carlisle?" I turned to face him, begging him with my eyes to do it for me.

Carlisle looked at me sadly. "Of course I can, Bella. Emmett, Rosalie will you both come to my office with me? Alice, maybe you can come too?"

"Sure, Dad," Alice agreed.

"Bella, please don't leave yet," Carlisle pleaded as they were leaving the room. "I'd still like to spend time with you both." His expression was hopeful.

I closed my eyes and swallowed, nausea rolling over me as the guilt hit me like a rogue wave.

"I won't," I assured.

"Let's get you some lunch, sweetheart. Do you want to help?" Esme asked Charlie sweetly. He nodded and I followed them to the kitchen sitting down at the island with Jasper. He rubbed circles on my back as I rested my head onto my arms.

I heard yelling coming down the hallway from the direction of Carlisle's office and shook my head. Emmett had always been so sweet to me. I had rarely heard or seen him get angry growing up. It actually scared me.

"Don't worry about it, sugar," Jasper soothed.

About ten minutes later Carlisle's office door slammed open and I heard Emmett's heavy footsteps. I tried to brace myself for the onslaught of verbal abuse, but was completely surprised by what happened. Emmett scooped me up into his arms.

"As much as I don't agree with your decision to hide this, Bella. I'm going to kick my brother's ass for what he did to you."

"Language," Esme scolded, flicking her eyes over to Charlie and then back.

Emmett looked at my son, whose attention was on the noodles and cheese Esme had just put in front of him.

"Emmett, he doesn't know," I said quietly, biting my lip.

"Oh, I know he doesn't know about. . ." he tilted his head towards my son. "But that's not going to keep me from ripping him a new one. I could look away when it was hags like Tanya he was treating like crap, but not you."

Rosalie and Alice entered the room. Rose looked at me sympathetically, but didn't say anything.

"Come on, darling, I want to show you a few things." Esme picked up Charlie's bowl and led him back towards the music room.

"Look guys," I started. "You want to blame Edward for this entire situation and trust me, I'm honestly thanking God that you haven't torn me to pieces and burned my body, but he didn't do it by himself. Unfortunately, I was left to clean up the mess. It was my choice to do this on my own."

"You're actually defending him, Bella?" Rosalie growled. "I mean, really? Fine it was really fucked up that you didn't tell any of us, especially Edward, but we all know the fucker. Especially how he was in high school. He had no right. Even if he didn't know you were a virgin when he fucked you, he shouldn't have just left you there. And when he did find out, he should have at least talked to you about it. He would have made your life a living hell had he known you were planning to keep the baby. If it had been me, I wouldn't have told him either."

We all just stared at Rose. She wasn't usually one for a lot of words, but when she spoke, everyone listened.

Esme rejoined us in the kitchen smiling. There was light music coming from the piano. It wasn't anything complicated; Mary had a little lamb, but it was being played perfectly. I looked up at her and arched my eyebrow.

"Really, Esme?"

"It's all him, Bella. He has an amazing ear."

We spent the next two hours looking at pictures that had been taken over the years. Emmett guffawed loudly when he saw a picture of me nine months pregnant. I was standing next to a picnic table with sunglasses on and my hair was pulled back into messy ponytail, which had been whipping around in the wind. I was wearing my favorite pair of maternity jeans and a white long-sleeved t-shirt that read "Who's your mommy?" on the front.

"Oh my God, you were _huge_!"

I glared at him playfully.

"Just what every woman wants to hear when she's bringing a new life into the world Emmett."

Everyone laughed.

"Who took the photo, Bella? Alice asked.

"Riley." Silence.

"Who the fuck is Riley?" Emmett looked up at me in confusion.

_I hate this fucking question._

"Um, he's my uh, boyfriend, I guess." I explained once again. "I met him the day I moved into the dorms. He followed me everywhere constantly opening doors for me and buying me coffee. I think he was trying to get laid." I had to laugh remembering the insanity of it all. " I was always too tired to be bothered with him though. At the time, I didn't know why I was always passing out whenever I was sitting down for too long. He was the first person I told when I found out I was pregnant. I figured I should tell him before I got too attached to his friendship. That way, when he left, I wouldn't be that upset."

Everyone was quiet. They were all staring down at their drinks, so I continued.

"But he didn't leave. He hugged me and let me cry. He told me he'd help me out and take care of me. He's been my best friend ever since."

I heard a noise and looked to see Alice, a sad look in her eyes and a frown on her lips.

"He's the only reason I have photos of myself during the whole thing. He insisted that I'd appreciate it one day. He was right. He probably would have been in the delivery room with me if he could have been. He was chaperoning his little sister's high school spring break in Cancun. He nearly had a heart attack when I called him to tell him that I had had the baby."

No one really spoke. I suppose a "oh, that's nice" or " wow, what a good friend" would have been too fake at that point, so I was glad that they all just let it go.

"Anyhoo! I should get Charlie home. He's got to take a bath tonight." I said the 'take a bath' loudly so that he would know what was in store for the evening.

"I not dirty, Mommy." As he said this he looked up at us and I busted out laughing. Everyone else followed my gaze and started chuckling loudly. He had blue marker smeared across his face from his mouth to his left ear. I stood up.

"Move it buster, let's go." Charlie picked himself up from the floor where he had been coloring. He picked up his piece of paper and handed it to Esme.

"I made dis for you," he smiled shyly. Esme took the picture from him.

"It's me pwaying the pinano."

"The pinano?" she asked him. I could see her eyes growing wet. I glanced down and sure enough there was a little stick figure standing on a bench in front of a big blue…pinano.

"It's beautiful, sweetheart, thank you." Esme leaned down and Charlie threw his arms around her neck and smacked his lips on her cheek.

Introducing Charlie to the Cullen's hadn't been as painful as I thought it would be. They all seemed to be dealing with it as well as could be expected. I knew it was only a matter of time before Edward returned. I had no idea how I was going to approach him, but hopefully I had a little more time to think about it.

XXXXXX

It had been a just over a week since I had introduced Charlie to Esme and Carlisle and there had been no word from Edward. I was beginning to feel comforted by the idea that maybe he would be going to medical school elsewhere and not returning to Forks until at least Christmas. That, at least gave me a few more months. Alice and I were spending pretty much every day together. Jasper had accepted an accounting job with a firm in Port Angeles and she was enjoying the time to get to know her nephew before starting her design internship with Esme.

Carlisle and Esme had wasted no time in deciding to move back to Forks. Esme was re-opening her interior design firm and Carlisle had agreed to return to Forks Community Hospital and was starting with paperwork and catching up. Esme had joined Alice, Charlie, and I on a few shopping excursions.

She kept trying to buy Charlie things, which I allowed at first. He needed a new pair of shoes and I didn't begrudge her buying him a few odds and ends, but eventually I had to put my foot down.

"Esme, enough, please. He doesn't need anything else."

"Bella, I'd like to hope that Charlie will be spending time at our house. I'd like for him to have his own space with his own toys, maybe a few extra clothes just in case."

She had a point. I had started calling Esme 'Gramma Esme' and Carlisle 'Papa Carlisle' around him. He seemed fairly receptive and I had to admit that it would be nice to eventually have him spend the night with them. I hadn't really been anywhere without him other than out and about since he was born and the idea of a girls weekend with Alice somewhere warm and sunny was so inviting. It's not that I didn't trust my dad- I did, on shorter excursions. Maybe even overnight, but I would not subject either one of them to more than that.

XXXXXX

It was Thursday morning and Alice had already scheduled our entire weekend. She and Rose were planning on heading into Port Angeles on Friday night with me in tow to do a little bar hopping. Then on Saturday afternoon my dad, Charlie and I would be joining the Cullen's for a barbecue at their house. I rolled out of bed at just after seven, when Charlie started poking at my face.

"Oh my God, Charlie, really?" I groaned.

"Mama? Mama? Mommy?"

I groaned and lifted my head to look at him.

"Yes, Charlie?"

"Grampa towd me to wake you up."

"Oh he did, did he?"

Charlie nodded. "Auntie Awice says caw her."

"Auntie Alice?" It was the first time I had ever heard him call her that.

"Yep."

"Okay, I'm up."

He sauntered out of the room and I dragged myself to the bathroom, brushing my teeth and showering quickly. Ten minutes later I pulled my hair up into a bun and threw on some skinny jeans, red chucks, and an old faded grey Rolling Stones t-shirt. I grabbed some clothes for Charlie and helped him get dressed. As I sat down to drink my coffee I pulled out my cell phone to text Jake.

**Hey, can you come over and watch Charlie? ~B~**

**Big or little? ;-) ~J~**

_Smartass_

**Ha ha. Little, of course. ~B~**

**Sure, what's up? ~J~**

**Need to run some errands. It's easier and faster to do it on my own.~B~**

**Give me 15? ~J~**

**Sure, thanx Jake. ~B~**

**My pleasure Bells. ~J~**

Charlie was sitting across from me slurping his cheerios.

"Jake's coming to play for a while, baby."

"Okay."

"Maybe you can show him the new tree house Grampa's building."

"Oh yeah!" Charlie looked excited now.

True to his word, Jake was standing in front of the house 15 minutes later. His dark hair was shaggy and hanging down into his eyes.

"You need a haircut, Jake."

"I know, you want to do it for me?"

"Not unless you want it shaved."

"Um, no, not really."

"Well that's your answer then. Get Sue to do it, or Emily."

"All right. Where's monkey man?"

As if to answer to the question Charlie was flying through the air into Jake's arms. His green eyes were bright.

"Grampa maked me a tree house, wanna see it?"

Jake looked at me and mouthed, "Is it safe?"

I laughed. "Yes, Jake, so far so good. Just don't go jumping up and down in it and you should be okay."

I leaned in and kissed Charlie on the head. "I'm going now Baby, I'll be back in a few hours. Be good for Jake"

"Bye, dear. Do I get a goodbye kiss too?" Jake puckered his lips and made sucking noises.

Charlie laughed. I grabbed Jake's chin and pulled him down to me before planting a sweet kiss on his cheek. He grinned at me and mirrored my kiss.

I turned on my car and took off. I could hear my phone buzzing in my purse, but it was on the passenger's side floor and I wasn't about to reach over to grab it. It was quarter to eight; it would take me just under an hour and a half to get to Sequim so I could hit the Costco for Alice. Thirty minutes should be enough time to get everything and meet Alice for coffee at eleven. Fabulous.

My phone was vibrating all over the place the entire trip, but I knew it was just Alice. She was so obsessive when she was planning things. I ran around Costco like a mad woman for nearly forty-five minutes trying to grab everything on Alice's list. Before I left to go back home, I decided to check out what Alice wanted, just in case she needed to add to the list. I didn't want to have to turn around or come back tomorrow.

**7:45: 911 ~A~**

**8:00: Seriously Bella 911. Call me ASAP. ~A~**

**8:30: Bella, please. I know you're probably ignoring me, but this is IMPORTANT. ~A~**

**9:00 I don't want to have to tell you this via text Bella. CALL ME. ~A~**

**9:30 Shit Bella. EDWARD IS HERE. IN TOWN. CAME HOME EARLY THIS MORNING. WANDERING AROUND FORKS. PLEASE BE CAREFUL AND LEAVE CHARLIE AT HOME. ~A~**

I inhaled loudly at reading her last text and my heart lurched up into my throat.

Glancing at the clock and realized I had exactly one minute before she texted me again. So I dialed her number.

"Oh my God, Bella! Where have you been?"

"I'm in Sequim at Costco."

"Oh, thank God. I think Edward went to Port Angeles."

"You think?"

"Uh, yeah, he mentioned something about needing to go and then just disappeared. Where's Charlie?"

"I left him at home with Jake."

"Okay good. I'll see you in an hour."

I hung up and was surprisingly calm. Either that or I was in shock.

I started to drive back in silence so that I could think. About half way home, I decided that thinking was not exactly the best thing to be doing so I turned on my XM to Alternative Nation and listened to Radiohead crooning through my speakers. It was enough to put my mind at ease, at least for the moment. Before I realized it, I was pulling up in front of the coffee shop.

I didn't see Alice's car, which was a little weird considering it was already a few minutes past eleven and she was never late. I shook my head and grabbed my purse before heading into the shop. I thought about waiting to order, but I really needed a coffee pretty much instantly.

_Too bad this coffee shop doesn't have liquor license or I'd be spicing up my coffee quite a bit._

"Four-fifty please," the clerk at the coffee shop said robotically as she handed me my coffee. I opened my wallet to grab a fiver when I saw a hand slip by me and put a ten on the countertop.

"I've got it," a deep silky voice said from directly behind me.

I didn't have to even look at him to know who it was, but I did anyway. Fear crept up my spine and must have attacked my verbal output center.

"The fuck you do," I growled.

"Wow, what a way to say hello, Bella," he smirked.

I stared into those all-too-familiar green eyes for a moment before shoving my own money on the counter top.

"I'm not saying hello, Edward." I turned around and tried to walk away but he grabbed my arm.

"Really, Bella? It's been four years."

"I'm all too aware of how long it's been, Edward. Fuck off!"

Luckily the shop wasn't too busy, but I saw several pairs of eyes widen at my blatant animosity.

"Suit yourself," he mumbled.

He let go of my arm, turned around and ordered himself a coffee. I found a table in the corner and tried to keep myself from shaking. I tripped and almost smacked my head on the table. I heard Edward chuckling from the other side of the shop and saw him shaking his head. The tinkling of the bell above the door announced Alice's arrival. She scanned the room and looked like she was about to shit a brick when she spotted Edward. Then she found me and rushed over, slipping into the chair across from me with wide eyes.

Edward continued to smirk and approached us.

"Well hello again, little sister. I see you've reacquainted with Bella."

"As much as I am _thrilled_ that you've come home, Edward, we have shit to do." Alice snapped. I didn't miss the venom in her voice and chanced a peek at her. She was glaring at him.

"Oh yeah?" He quirked an eyebrow at me. "Plans?"

"None of your fucking business, now go away," I seethed.

He just shook his head again and laughed.

"Yes, ma'am." He saluted me and swaggered away. I tried not to look, I really did, but I couldn't help myself. His well-worn jeans were slung low on his hips and he was wearing just a plain grey t-shirt. I could see just the bottom of a tattoo on his left bicep.

"Bella?" I faintly heard a little voice call my name.

"What?"

"Put your tongue back in your mouth."

"I wasn't…."

"Don't even try it, Bella. It doesn't matter how much you may hate my brother, and this is just gross for me to even say, but he's still fucking hot. We can't go anywhere without girls throwing themselves at him. It's kind of sickening. I think he's even tired of it."

"Whatever, Alice. The last memory I have of him is when he threw a towel at me and told me to 'clean myself up'. Not exactly fun times."

Alice cringed and a look bordering between sadness and sympathy flashed in her eyes and just as quickly disappeared.

"All right. Did he say anything to you before I came in?"

"He tried to buy my coffee. I told him to 'fuck off.'"

"Good girl," Alice grinned at me.

"You do realize that we can't do the barbecue this weekend, right?"

"Yeah, we were talking about that this morning. Can you get a babysitter?"

"No, Alice, I can't. I already ask too much of the few babysitters I have."

"Hmmmm. Well, I don't think he's planning on being there the entire time. I'll think of something. Just give me a few hours. We're still going out tomorrow night though?" she asked hopefully.

I sighed thankful for the change of topic. I loved going out, mainly because I didn't get to do it very often, but I usually got myself into some kind of trouble. I was a frisky drunk and occasionally had difficulty keeping my body parts to myself.

"Please promise me that you won't let me do anything stupid," I pleaded.

Alice's face split into a wide grin. " Um, Bella? What kind of trouble can you get into? It's Port Angeles."

"Um, Alice?" I mimicked her tone. "If there is trouble to be had when I am drinking, you better believe that I will find it."

Alice started giggling. "This should be fun. We've never been out drinking in a bar together."

I groaned and blew air out of the side of my mouth, but I couldn't help the small smile that escaped.

_This should be fun indeed._

**_XXXXXXX_**

**AN: So. . . Edward returns. What do you think?**

**As we move forward, please remember that these people are flawed. They make bad decisions, mistakes, and accusations. They lash out in anger and in fear. This is going to be a bumpy ride so just sit back and fasten your seat belts. **

**I love hearing from you so please review. **

**Next Chapter: EPOV. **


	5. The Prodigal Son

**AN: Thank you so much to everyone who continues to read and review. You're thoughts and words mean so much to me.**

**Super big thank you to Mollie for helping me mesh. :o)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Twilight related, but I do own the storyline.**

XXXXXXX

Chapter 4: The Prodigal Son

EPOV

As I pulled into the driveway I took a deep breath. It had been a long fucking time. I should have come back to visit, but what would my excuse have been? Mom and Carlisle had moved with us. Tanya was probably around, but she and I hadn't been on speaking terms in over two years and I had no other real connections to this place. There was no reason I should have wanted to come back.

It was five-thirty in the morning and still dark outside. I knew that everyone would be asleep.

I got out of the car, not bothering with any of my bags. When I got to the front door, I unlocked it and grabbed the newspaper up off the doormat. I'm not sure why I still had the key on my key chain. I just never took it off. I suppose I always knew that my parents would come back to Forks eventually. You don't keep a house just for the sake of keeping it. Mom loved this place. It was easily worth a couple of million and I'm sure it would have sold. Boston had its charm and mom had loved the history that was proudly displayed on every street corner, but it wasn't Forks. Soggy, dark, depressing Forks, Washington.

I crept into the kitchen and turned on a light, throwing the newspaper onto the island. The bright light blinded me and I quickly turned it off again. I smiled. It looked just like it had that last morning, the morning we left. I'm not quite sure what I was expecting. It's not like they could have completely re-decorated or renovated in ten days. Shit, who was I kidding, yes they could have.

I heard a clicking sound and turned to see that the coffee pot had turned itself on, like it was welcoming me home. Thank God for my ever-predictable father and the fucking programmable coffee pot.

I sat down at the island and waited as the sounds and smells of brewing coffee filled the room. I poured myself a mug and sat back down. I was really fucking tired. My whole sleeping pattern had been thrown off during the drive.

The first day I had left at lunchtime and drove for nearly twenty hours going 90 miles per hour most of the way. I figured it was time to find a hotel when I was jerked awake by those stupid warning treads on the side of the road that tell you that you're about to run off the road. Thank Christ for those stupid fucking warnings. Then I slept all day, woke up, ate dinner and took off again. I drove through the night again and then got stuck in fucking roadworks and morning rush hour traffic as I was driving through Billings. What should have taken me a few hours took me nearly eight and I had to stop in Spokane. I slept until nearly midnight and then took off for home. Six hours later, there I was, sitting, in the dark, drinking coffee in the house that I had pretty much grown up in.

The light flipped on, blinding me again.

"Jesus Christ!" Carlisle nearly yelled.

I looked up and grinned at him. "Hey, Pops, how's it hanging?"

"Edward, you scared the shit out of me. Why are you sitting here in the dark?"

I shielded my eyes. "Too fucking bright," I muttered. "It's nice to see you too."

He walked over to me and placed a warm hand on my shoulder."Good to see you, son."

He poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down across from me. We continued nursing our coveted caffeine in silence for few minutes before he started. "We weren't expecting you. To what do we owe the pleasure?" There was a slight edge in his voice.

I tried to ignore it, but something was off. It was almost like he didn't want me there.

"I'm heading over to Seattle to check out U Dub. Alice told me a few weeks ago that she and Jasper were planning on heading back here and I heard from Emmett that he and Rose wanted to come back too. And then you and Mom apparently decided on spur of the moment to return too. So when I got back to Boston after checking out a few medical schools I said, 'what the hell'. I packed up my shit and figured I'd head home too; at least until I figure out what the hell I'm going to do next." I took a big swig of coffee. "I told mom last week that I was coming. Is that okay?"

Carlisle looked up surprised. "Of course, son. This will always be your home. And yes, she did tell me. I just didn't realize she meant so soon."

"Thanks, Dad. I just figured, why wait? I had nothing holding me back there and nothing really to do. So. . . here I am."

I really did appreciate Carlisle. He wasn't my biological father, but I wish he had been. It was all a big fucking mess for a long time. My mom married her childhood sweetheart, Edward Masen, right after they graduated high school. Emmett was born a year later and I followed 18 months after that. He wasn't around very much from what I remember. My first real memory was a huge fight between my parents. I just remember my mom screaming and crying and slamming the doors. Our father was yelling furiously. Emmett and I sat huddled together on his bed waiting for it all to stop.

A few days later, we were introduced to Alice, our new sister. She was tiny and spunky and fun and only a couple of months younger than me. We all just clicked from the very beginning.

Apparently, our father had been having an affair with another woman and she got pregnant at the same time that my mom was pregnant with me. Alice's mother committed suicide when our father informed her that he would not be leaving Mom. The fight had been about the affair.

My father wanted to take Alice in and wanted my mom to raise her. Mom told me a few years later that it had never been about Alice. She would have taken her in regardless, but she was devastated to find out that her marriage was one big fucking lie.

Alice came to live with us and it was like she had always been there. When Emmett was 6 and Alice and I were 5, our father was killed in a car accident. Drunk driving or some shit. Carlisle had been a childhood friend of both my parents and came to pay his respects. He had just returned home from medical school and was doing a medical internship in Chicago when he heard what had happened.

He became her best friend and most trusted confidant. He was more like a father to the three of us than Edward Masen had ever been. Two years later, they were married and Carlisle adopted us. When I was eight, we moved to Seattle and then to Forks.

"Edward?" I heard my mother's surprised gasp.

I turned and flashed her a wide grin. Jumping from the stool, I took two long strides and wrapped my arms around her, picking her up and squeezing her to me.

"Hi, Mama," I kissed her on the cheek and set her down.

"Uh, hi, honey. Um, We didn't know you were coming."

I furrowed my brow and looked at her.

"That's what Dad said. I told you I was looking into school over here."

"Oh, I know, honey. I mean, we just didn't expect you here this morning."

"Well, I thought I'd surprise you."

"And so you have," Carlisle mumbled just as he was putting his mug to his mouth. I'm pretty sure that he didn't intend for me to hear that. I stared at my parents for a minute. What the hell was going on? It's not like I didn't just see them a few weeks ago.

My mom retrieved her own coffee and joined Carlisle who was opening the newspaper that I had brought in. I saw them share a quick glance at each other and then Carlisle went back to his newspaper and my mom nursed her steaming cup of joe.

"So what are your plans?"she asked me quietly.

"Well, I thought I'd spend a few days here before heading over to Seattle. I've got a few people I need to meet with about the program. Then I'll probably head back here for a while."

"Oh yeah?" my mom asked. She sounded a little nervous.

_What the fuck?_

"Are you going to check out the other schools as well?"

"Already have," I shrugged. "They're pretty good as well. I wouldn't be starting until next year so I thought I'd stick around here for a while and help out at the free clinic in Port Angeles."

_Again with the look._

"Oh, come on guys!" I said a little angrily. "If you don't want me here just fucking say it."

"Edward!" Carlisle warned. He didn't mind my language, but I knew that I was inching over the line on my tone of voice.

"Honey, of course we want you here."

"Then what's with all the looks?"

"What looks?" my mom asked in surprise.

"The looks you two keep exchanging."

"I…I didn't realize we…."

"Edddddiiiiiiieee," a loud voice boomed from behind me.

I turned around to see my brother Emmett strolling into the kitchen. He gave me a fist bump and then went to kiss our mom on the top of the head.

"Morning Ma, Dad," he grinned at them. "What's for breakfast?"

"I don't know, what are you making?" Mom deadpanned.

Emmett's face fell and I couldn't help but snicker.

"Seriously Ma? You know I can't cook."

"Well, I guess you better learn pretty quick then cause I'm pretty freaking hungry," she said, all traces of humor still absent.

Emmett just stared at her for a few minutes and then grumbled as he retrieved some orange juice from the fridge. My mom looked up and winked at me.

"And don't drink straight from the carton," she scolded without even looking behind her. Emmett halted the carton just as it was about to reach his lips.

"How does she do that?" he mouthed at me.

I shook my head and shrugged.

"So, what the fuck are you doing here?" Emmett asked as he grabbed himself a glass and set it down in front of my mom as he poured it, over exaggerating each move to satisfy her. As he was returning the carton to the fridge, Mom lifted the glass to her lips and took a long, loud sip.

"Thanks, sweetheart," she said adoringly.

Emmett gaped at her.

"That's some fucked up shit there, Ma."

"Emmett!" Carlisle scolded without looking up from his newspaper. I saw him trying very hard to suppress a smile.

"She drank my juice," he protested.

Mom just chuckled as Emmett sighed dramatically and got himself a new glass.

"No, seriously bro, what brings you to this neck of the woods?'

I sighed.

"Why do I have to have a reason for being here?"

"Because you're a selfish asshole who doesn't ever do anything without an ulterior motive," Rosalie's voice snapped from behind me. I turned to face her.

"Fuck off, Rose," I snarled.

"Uh, Dude, not cool," Emmett said wrapping his arm around Rose's waist and pulling her into his side. "Mmmmm, good morning, baby."

"Yes, it was, thank you," Rose purred as she kissed him firmly on the lips, biting his lower lip and tugging it before heading to get herself some coffee. I grimaced and shivered watching their disgusting display. Gross.

"Alright, well anyway. I'm gonna take a shower and then shoot up to Port Angeles. I've got shit to do before I head over to Seattle."

"Oh, you're heading to Seattle?" Rose asked a little too nicely. Then she glanced at Emmett who was drinking his juice. He met her gaze quickly before looking up to study some random invisible spot on the ceiling.

_Again? Either I'm really fucking paranoid or something is seriously going on._

"Uh, yeah. I'm going to meet with some of the program heads of the medical school. I won't start for another year though so you better stop giving each other funny looks and get used to the idea of me being around," I snapped as I headed towards my old bedroom.

I stopped just outside of my bedroom and put my palm flat against the heavy wood. The memories were flooding back. Jasper, Emmett and I watching pornos and getting drunk until we either threw up or passed out on the floor, Alice and I smoking pot for the first time when we were fifteen and eating an entire canister of that three-flavor Christmas popcorn. And of course, the last girl I had ever had in my room. My throat was suddenly thick, my chest tight. I didn't want to remember that.

_I wonder if she's still around? Probably not._

There's no way that Chief Swan would go anywhere else, but Bella was always too smart to be stuck in this little town.

After I found out that she had been a virgin, I stripped the sheets. I couldn't bear to have the remnants of that night next to my skin. If I had been paying attention, I would have seen, but I wasn't and I hurt her. I did keep the pillow cases though. Her smell was all over them, lavender and vanilla. I breathed her scent in every time put my head on that pillow. God, I had really fucked up that situation. I was such a fucking bastard. It was almost too painful to even think about it. I had no idea if those pillowcases were even still there. I know I hadn't removed them before we left.

_I wonder if I could still smell her. Do scents hang around for four years?_

I opened the door and frowned. The bed had been stripped bare. The whole room looked kind of sad. Really un-lived in.

Duh! No one has been living here you idiot.

I went to the linen closet and pulled out a set of sheets and pillowcases and a few towels before realizing that I had left my suitcases in the car.

I walked back down the stairs and heard hushed voices.

"What are we going to do?"

"I'm not sure yet. We're going to have to talk to her. She needs to be the one to direct this."

"Seriously, we're not going to be able to keep this a secret very long. This is a small fucking town."

"I just wished he had called to let us know. Then at least we could have warned her earlier."

"I'll call her. Tell her to keep a heads up. "

_Alice's voice. Alice is up._

I couldn't take it any longer. "Warned who about what?" I asked casually as I strolled back into the kitchen.

Everyone jumped.

"Edward!" Alice came over to me and gave me a hug, but it wasn't the warm and fuzzy sisterly hug that she usually gave me. It was a tense and awkward hug. They were definitely hiding something.

"We were just talking about the barbecue we're having this weekend. A few old friends coming by, nothing big."

_A few old friends?_

They could have been talking about anyone then. I had really burned some bridges with the girls at our high school.

I didn't think Alice liked any of the girls that I messed around with back then, but who knew. Maybe things had changed. Alice hadn't even been there 2 weeks, but she's was a fucking social Tasmanian devil.

_Oh crap. Okay, gonna have to think about this whole barbecue thing. Maybe I can show up at the very end. That way I won't have to talk to anyone for very long. Can I get away with not showing up at all?_

"Uh, I have some things to do on Saturday so I probably won't be able to be there the whole time."

"That's fine," Alice assured me nervously. "Like I said, it's not that big of a deal."

"I'm gonna get my bags," I mumbled as I left the room and went to get my shit out of the car.

They were no longer huddled around the island when I came back in. Emmett and Rose were sitting on the couch watching the news, Alice and Mom appeared to be making some breakfast. Jasper had taken Carlisle's place at the island and was now reading the paper and Carlisle was nowhere to be seen.

I shuffled my way back to my bedroom and jumped into the shower. The scalding hot water hit my skin and my muscles started relaxing. They had been pretty tight from all the driving. I thought about rubbing one out, but honestly, I'd run out of material to fantasize about. I hadn't been laid in months and even at that, the girls that I had fucked over the last year weren't anything I really wanted to think about. I mean, they did what I needed them to do, but I wasn't really interested in any repeat performances, even if it was only in my head.

I could have fantasized about _her_. I had tried not to think about her over the years, but now that I was back in this room it was really hard not to. That night had been such a colossal clusterfuck on my part. I knew that she couldn't have enjoyed it. That alone made it non-fantasizing material, but the memory of the way her soft lips felt against mine just about melted me. I had had to work so hard to keep my brain and my body separate that night. Not something that's easy to do when you're as fucked up as I was. I didn't want to see her as anything other than another notch, but she was gorgeous and innocent and feisty as all hell. She was Bella. Simply said, she was more than just another notch.

I gave up. I couldn't do it. A half hour later I was back down in the kitchen. Everyone had pretty much disappeared other than Mom and Rose who were sitting on the couch chatting quietly.

I smelled food and realized I was really fucking hungry. Like she could read my mind my mom looked over at me.

"There's an omelet and some bacon and sausage in the warming drawer, Edward."

"Thanks, Mom."

I opened the drawer and my mouth started watering immediately. Yum, mom-made food is the best. I grabbed the plate out and then went to get some orange juice. For the first time I noticed a picture hanging from the side of the fridge. "Hey, ma, what the fuck is this?"

"What the fuck is what, Edward," Mom asked with a little bit of an irritation in her voice. My mouth gaped a little at the foul language that just rolled from her tongue. My mother was not one who swore very often. I took a shallow breath, held it for a moment and let it out loudly before continuing.

"This?" I grabbed the picture and took it over to her.

She stared at it for a moment with a blank look on her face before answering. "Uh, a friend's little boy drew it for me," she smiled. "It's him playing the piano."

_Excuse me?_

"My piano?" I asked tersely.

My mom rotated her whole body to face me.

"Yes, Edward, he was playing the piano that your father and I bought for you."

_Oh, she's going to pull that card on me is she?_

"Mom, please tell me that you did not let some little brat pound on my piano," I groaned.

"Edward, I did not let some little brat pound on your piano. He's actually quite a natural. He has a good ear."

"Yeah, well…" I couldn't really think of anything to say. She had said the same thing about me when I was first learning to play and not to brag or anything, but I turned out to be fucking awesome with the piano. Besides, I kind of had to trust that my mom wouldn't let someone just bang the shit out of a $65,000 Baby Grand.

"All right, I'm heading out. I'll be back later, I guess."

"Okay, honey."

XXXXX

I finished with my shit in Port Angeles really quickly. In all honesty I didn't have anything serious to do. I was just picking up a few books about interviewing for medical programs. I had already taken the MCAT and scored a 40 out of 45. I had applied to several schools and could have gone to Harvard or Johns Hopkins if I really wanted to. But U Dub had a great program too and now that my family seemed to be returning to the area, it only made sense to at least check out what was available.

It was only eleven when I passed the 'Welcome to Forks' sign. I wasn't quite ready to go back home and face all of the shady whispering that my family seemed so fond of today so I pulled up outside of the coffee shop. Might as well waste my time getting a decent caffeine buzz. I pulled open the door, the little bell tinkling loudly and I stopped dead in my tracks.

_Well, shit on a stick. No fucking way!_

She stood at the counter waiting for her order. Wow! A few years had definitely been kind to her. She was a little curvier, but not too much. She was still slender; her firm legs encased in a pair of jeans that made her butt look edible. She had hips now and the t-shirt she was wearing was fitted, but not clinging to her. Her hair was pulled up and her neck was tilted slightly to the side.

She was rubbing it with her fingers like she was massaging a knot out. I wasn't sure at that moment what I wanted to do. I could just walk right out and pretend that I never saw her, but that was going to be hard to do every time if I was going to be around for a while. I could sneak up behind her, wrap my arm around her waist and kiss her neck, whispering something seductive in her ear. That was my usual M.O.

_Not a good idea Cullen, you stole her virginity and walked away never to see her again. She probably hates your guts and would pound your dick into the ground._

On that painful note, I adjusted myself and decided on a less aggressive mode of communication. I approached her quietly and as she was reaching for her purse to pay I slid my own bill onto the counter top.

"I've got it."

I could see Bella freeze. Her jaw tightened and she turned to look at me in complete shock. Then it turned to rage.

"The fuck you do!" she practically screamed at me.

_Uh, yeah, she hates your guts._

"Wow, what a way to say hello, Bella."

I knew I was treading on thin ice here, but I couldn't help myself. I was hoping that the charm that everyone seemed to think I had would be in full effect and she would forgive and forget.

"I'm not saying hello, Edward"

_Apparently not._

She tried to walk away from me, but I grabbed her arm as gently as I could.

"Really, Bella? It's been four years," I practically begged. With the look she gave me I found myself subconsciously protecting my genitals. I was pretty sure I was about to lose them.

"I'm all too aware of how long it's been, Edward. Fuck off!"

_Well Shit. Could this have gone any worse?_

"Suit yourself."

I was trying to come off all nonchalant, but that stung. I knew that I probably fucked up even more than I had originally thought, but what's that saying 'time heals all wounds.'

_Yeah, well apparently no one told Bella that._

And, in all honesty, as much as I was hoping to get over what had happened, time hadn't exactly sealed up that wound for me either.

I let go of her arm and ordered myself a drink before turning around to watch her. She almost knocked herself out as she tripped and I chuckled a little.

_Still the same little Bella._

I heard that stupid annoying bell above the door and turned to see Alice rushing over to join Bella.

_Well fuck me. They're already best friends again._

_That could be a very bad, because Bella apparently still had the same affect on me that she had back then._

I approached them silently and could see both of them tense up.

"Well hello, little sister. I see you've reacquainted with Bella."

"As much as I am thrilled that you've come home, Edward, we have shit to do."

I could definitely hear the sarcasm dripping from her tongue.

_Well, what the fuck did I do to her to deserve that?_

_Uh, you fucked her best friend in the worst possible way._

_Oh right. But that would mean that Alice would have to know. Right? Oh shit._

I tried to keep my focus on their conversation.

"Oh yeah?" I asked looking at Bella "Plans?"

"None of your fucking business, Edward. Go away."

I needed to get out of there. I vocalized a fake chuckle and saluted as I walked out the door.

"Yes ma'am."

The minute I was outside I started swearing.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck." Alice had to know. It had to have been recent too, because she had never once treated me like that after it had actually happened. Alice and I had always been close and not once did she express any concern with my philandering. As long as I stayed away from Bella, that is. She figured that with the way girls just flung themselves at me they deserved what they got, a fantastic fuck and nothing else. Suddenly everything made sense. The stiff hug this morning, the whispering, the awkwardness.

"Oh, Shit."

I hoped to God that Bella was not the 'she' that my family was talking about this morning. If she was, they all knew what had happened and my ass was not safe.

I sat in my car trying to drink my coffee for a few minutes before even attempting to go back home. When I finally started driving I began flipping through my memory of what had happened that night.

She had been in my bed, sleeping. I was drunk and I was high. At first I didn't know who it was, but I knew that I hadn't invited them to be there. I was a little pissed off. I pulled her off the bed and saw who it was. She looked so innocent and a little bit scared and she was so unbelievably beautiful. I had instantly gone hard. She was backing up and I went to her, pressing myself into her. I remember the lust, the unbelievable urge to rip her clothes off and fuck her up against the wall, but it was Bella, my sister's best friend who never showed any interest in me. Who never flirted or threw herself at me. Hell, she rarely spoke to me.

I had noticed her. I noticed her the first time that Alice brought her home when we were twelve. She was skinny and awkward, but there was just something undeniably beautiful about her. And as we got older she only got more beautiful. Alice was afraid I'd break Bella's heart and that their friendship would become complicated. She was probably right. I loved my sister and for that reason I never associated myself with Bella outside of her interactions with my family.

So I busied myself with other completely vacant girls, trying very hard to ignore the stunningly perfect one that Alice insisted on parading around me on an almost daily basis. It almost made me angry except for the fact that I generally liked her being around.

Then, our junior year, Tanya arrived. She was outwardly flawless. Tall with long legs, strawberry blond hair, and the collars matched the cuffs. She had nice big tits and she was fairly smart too. She quickly made the cheerleading squad and as the captain of the varsity football, it was only expected that we would end up together. So we did. Not that I ever felt anything real, but I was supposedly perfect, and she was supposedly perfect and we were expected to be perfect _together_. God if only people had known. We fought constantly. She didn't want me to even glance at other girls. I would get reamed out if I was caught talking, standing too close to, or bumping into another girl. She was even fucking jealous of Alice. She demanded that I stop hanging out in my bedroom with my sister. What a completely insane request.

At first I had remained faithful. I mean _completely_ faithful, but eventually I got tired of constantly having to defend myself against things I hadn't done. If I was going to get in trouble, I was going to at least fucking enjoy it. It started out with blow jobs behind the school from a few freshmen as well as the familiar skanks, but quickly I started to enjoy more elicit activities. I would tell Tanya that I had detention and disappear into the boiler room with Jessica 'Fucking' Stanley, Lauren Mallory or some other worthless cow. I had a following, a harem of little ladies just waiting for their chance. And I gave it to them whenever and wherever I could. But no virgins. EVER.

Virgins got attached and I was not the kind of guy that could give them what they wanted. Plus, from what I'd heard, losing their virginity was not always a pleasant experience for girls and I didn't ever want myself to be associated sexually with anything unpleasant. I made it clear to every single one of my girls that all I was giving them was a quick fuck and they'd regret it if they ever talked. But Tanya found out. Not about all of them, hell, probably not even about half of them, but she would catch the unavoidable smiles that girls would throw my way and I couldn't always hide the smirks when I saw a girl who I had just fucked in some random school room. Tanya would scream at me for hours and somehow I always talked my way out of it.

But then there was Bella. She rarely paid any attention to me. I would get the occasionally "Hey Edward" but that was about it. I enjoyed making offhanded sexual comments around her, mostly so I could see her blush in embarrassment. I saw her dating other guys and I guess I just supposed that she gave it up to them because even Alice was sleeping with Jasper on a regular basis. Pretty stupid fucking thing to assume, but Mike Newton had all but spelled it out for us in the locker room one day.

And then, that night, I found her in my room. In my bed! And then she was gasping, and writhing against me. She let me touch her. For the first time in all those years my hands were on that gorgeous girl. My brain was trying to tell me to stop, but my body just kept screaming for her and when you're drunk and high, your body apparently overrides your mind because I just said "fuck it" and took her back to my bed. Before I knew it, I was tasting her and she was so fucking delicious. I couldn't stop myself. I wanted to feast on her forever. And then she came on my tongue, and oh my God it was heaven. She had pretty much ruined me. I could barely even stand the scent or taste of any other girl after that. Eventually I gave up going down on girls all together. It just wasn't pleasurable for me anymore.

I had to have her. I leaned over her and she rolled away. I pulled her back to me and told her we weren't finished. I pulled off my jeans springing my aching cock from its prison and leaned into her. In a very brief moment of clarity I needed to make sure she was okay with it. I needed her to tell me. I needed her to tell me to stop so that I wouldn't fuck it all up, but then those words came out of her mouth. "_Just fucking do it, Edward_."

Everything went hazy again. My logical self had simply vanished into some dark cavern of my brain and what was left was anger. I was pissed off that I couldn't control myself. For six years I had stayed away from her, to protect my sister and to protect Bella from becoming one of those girls who deserved my asshole behavior, and here she was telling me to 'just fucking do it'.

I pounded her with every single bit of frustration and anger that was in me. I could hear her cry out, but at the time and in my fucked up state of mind I thought it was a cry of passion. I didn't realize that I had just fucking torn her up. And then I just left her there; threw a towel at her and disappeared. I didn't want to, I wanted to stay and wrap my arms around her, but I just couldn't. We were leaving and it had been a mistake. I knew it immediately. I was freaking out. I had to get out of there.

I went to Tanya's. I didn't have sex with her. I didn't even sleep with her. I just passed out on her couch. And Jesus fucking Christ when I went into that coffee shop and Bella was there with Alice, I just about fucking lost it. I felt so guilty, but the anger was still there. Not at her, but at myself. I was sure that she had told Alice. At least until Alice told me that she was a virgin and asked me what I thought Bella should do to rectify that situation. Then I was beyond pissed and completely and utterly heartbroken. I had taken that from her. Bella knew that I didn't do virgins. She had been right there when Jasper and I had talked about it when I was sixteen. I remember because she got really fucking embarrassed and turned bright red and we all laughed at her for being such a prude. She didn't fucking tell me. I even gave her the chance.

I tried everything I could to express how fucking furious I was with my glare. And then I walked away, again.

Minutes later the realization hit me of what I had done to her. I had been so rough, practically violent in the way I had fucked her. The screams had been because she was in pain. Oh Jesus Christ, I had hurt her. I had never physically hurt a girl in my life. I liked sex that was a little rougher, but so did they. I had never lost control and gone beyond what any of them could handle. But there it was, that's exactly what I had done. And the guilt and shame and anger at myself returned with a vengeance.

It was weeks before I was even okay enough to hear her name without a rush of emotions slamming me in the face. And then we were leaving. I thought I could talk to her about it at our going away party, but Alice said she was sick. And I never saw her again. I suppose the guilt just kind of washes away over the years, especially when you don't have to look it in the face.

Now I was back and it was pretty fucking obvious that she hadn't forgiven or forgotten. It also appeared as though my family knew. I mean, they had always known that I was a fucking bastard when it came to women. I didn't trust them and therefore never kept them around for very long. Stupid fucking Tanya had seen to that, but they had all known and loved Bella. She was practically part of the family for so many years.

Fuck!

I pulled up into the driveway, a little relieved that I only saw my mom's and Jasper's cars in the driveway. Those two would be the easiest to talk to about it if, in fact, they did know. I walked in and down the hallway. My mom was sitting on the couch reading a book and Jasper was rummaging around in the fridge.

"Hi, sweetheart. That was fast," she said, glancing up at me.

I looked over at Jasper who had just emerged with an armful of sandwich supplies and we nodded at each other.

"It didn't take me as long as I expected. I stopped by and got some coffee on my way through town though."

"Oh Yeah?"

"Yeah, I saw Alice. You'll never guess who she was with." My mom stiffened.

"Who, dear?"

"Bella Swan."

She swallowed harshly and I heard Jasper drop something behind me. Oh yeah, they knew something.

"Would either of you like to explain to me why Bella Swan makes everyone so nervous these days?"

I glanced over at Jasper who was now making eye contact with my mom. When he caught me staring at him, he looked back down at his sandwich.

"What do you mean, Edward?" Mom asked looking back down at her book.

"You're seriously going to sit here and tell me that you have no idea what I'm talking about, Mom?"

"Edward, look," Jasper started.

"No, Jasper," Mom interrupted. "This is not our place. Edward, if you want to talk about this, you need to talk to Bella first. Until we get the okay from her, there is no discussion to be had."

"What the fuck?" I bellowed. "She won't even fucking look at me, much less talk to me."

"I wouldn't either." I heard Jasper mutter under his breath.

"Fuck you, Jazz. You don't even know what fucking happened. All you've heard is her story."

"How do you even know what she's told us?" he shot back at me.

"I'm not an idiot. You guys were all tense and shit when I got here this morning. I heard you whispering about someone not wanting to see me and I got the cold shoulder from Alice when she was talking to Bella. And you just fucking confirmed it, Asshole!"

Jasper shook his head and started to walk away with his sandwich and a Coke.

"I'm done with your stupid shit, Edward," he grumbled.

"Whatever!"

"Edward, don't do this," Mom pleaded.

"Don't do what, Mom?"

"Don't be a complete asshole. We love you and you know that. When Bella's ready to talk to you, she will okay?"

I growled in frustration and went to my bedroom to blow off some steam. I used to get high at times like this, but since I was getting ready to interview at UW and possibly go to work for a free clinic, I figured I should lay off the weed and stick to more natural ways to relax. Fucking was out of the question at the moment since I had just gotten here and didn't even know if any of my old harpies were around, much less how to contact them. Plus, who knew what they had turned into in the last four years. I shuddered at the thought. I decided to go for a run. I stripped out of my jeans and threw on a pair of old sweats. The shirt I was wearing was just fine and I'd probably shed it at some point anyway. I grabbed my sneakers and my iPod and ran out the front door, not bothering to say anything to my mom.

I really fucking wondered what Bella had told them and why. Did she tell Alice and then that big-mouth spread the word? I couldn't imagine Bella ever feeling comfortable enough to tell my parents that we had even had sex much less how rough and raw it had been.

I really needed to stop fucking thinking about it. It wasn't helping with the whole blowing off steam thing. I ground out 5 miles before I was ready to get back home. When I got there, the house was empty. I was completely relieved. I wanted nothing more than to take another shower, climb into bed and stay there until the next morning. Tomorrow. Tomorrow I would find out what was going on. And maybe, just maybe I would figure out how to get Bella to forgive me. If she didn't, it was going to be a long fucking year.

XXXXXXX

**AN: So. . . what do you think of our Edward? A little bit more information. Obviously there are some things that Bella does not know. There is a big disconnect from how he behaved and what he thought and felt. That is how this Edward functions. You will want to remember that.**

**How about Esme and her interaction with her boys? I am a big fan of Esme's. :o)**

**Just so you know. The MCAT is actually separated into different sections that add up to a total of 45. I didn't want to go into that b/c I don't completely understand their scoring. A 40 is almost unheard of. Only the best of the best score that high. The average score for a Harvard medical school applicant is between 34 and 36. I wanted to emphasize just how open Edward's options for medical school are.**

**I love to hear your thoughts.**


	6. Bar Fights and Barbecues

**AN: Well hello again my Lovlies. I hope you all enjoyed Edward's POV. Some of you have changed your minds about him; others still think he's a complete asshole. Either way, I love hearing about it.**

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed. I adore you all sooooo much. Can I just tell you how stunned I am by the response. I mean seriously astounded. I have been responding to every review, so if you aren't getting the teasers, please PM me and we'll figure out why.**

**Thank yous go out to Dophingirl0206, twimom76, and edwardrocksmysocks for pimping out my little story here. If you hear about UP from any other person or community, please PM me and let me know so that I can properly thank those people too.**

**Thank you to Paige for taking up the beta gig w/o knowing what I was going to put you through. LOL. But look, my punctuation gets better with every chapter ;-)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns the characters.**

**XXXXXX**

**Chapter 5: Bar Fights and Barbecues**

BPOV

I was lying on my bed with my eyes closed when I heard the sound of a car pulling up outside. I had showered, but was still in my robe and had very little motivation to actually get up. I heard a knock, the front door opening and closing, the muffled voices getting closer and closer and finally the knock at my bedroom door.

"Come in, Alice," I groaned.

She pushed the door open and stood there with her hands on her hips. "Really, Bella?"

"God, you have no idea how exhausting the idea of getting ready sounds." " Awww, poor baby. Did you not get your afternoon nap today?" she mocked.

"Shut it."

Alice giggled. "Seriously, Bella, it's not like you're being sent to the executioners. We're going to a bar, with drinks and music, and boys. Can you at least pretend to be excited?"

I grunted in response, but she seemed to take that as her cue to begin the primping.

She pulled me off of the bed, sat me down in my desk chair and began the drying and styling of my hair. She curled it slightly and left it to hang down my shoulders and around my face.

"It's going to get hot in there," she said handing me a hair clip. "If you need to, pull it up and put it in this. It's better than a pony and it will help you from sweating like a hog."

"I'm beginning to take offense to your comparing me with barnyard animals," I joked.

"Hush up and let me finish so we can get you dressed," she directed. I did as I was told and an hour later I was dressed in a pair of designer red skinny jeans, a black triangle halter top and a pair of Dolce & Gabbana black patent leather studded sandals.

"Are you kidding me, Alice?" I moaned as I slipped the shoes on. "Are you trying to get me to kill myself?"

"Oh come on. They're only three and three quarters inch heels and they're chunky so you should be fine."

"And whose shoes are these anyway?"

"They're yours," she grinned.

"Alice," I groaned.

"Bella."

"I am not accepting a pair of $800 shoes from you."

"Don't be ridiculous, Bella. First of all, I got them on sale. Second, you deserve it. You have done such an amazing job raising my nephew to this point and I just wanted to thank you properly. "

"So putting me in an outfit that cost over a thousand dollars head to toe is your way of thanking me?"

Alice scoffed. "We're not discussing how much things cost."

"Alice."

"Nope," she said, popping the 'p'. " I'm done with this conversation. Let's go."

We entered the kitchen and my father let out a low whistle. "Holy cow, Bells." He was sitting at the kitchen table with Charlie who promptly turned around and grinned at me.

"You look pwetty, Mommy."

"Thank you, baby," I smiled back. "Come give me a kiss before I go." My sweet boy jumped from his chair and kind of run-skipped over to me. He planted a kiss on the corner of my mouth and hugged me tightly before returning to his place next to my dad.

"Dad, he needs to be in bed by eight," I said looking at my watch. It was 7:30 and I had a feeling, since Charlie was not in his pajamas yet that he would not be making that deadline.

My dad just nodded.

"Um, Bella?" My dad said clearing his throat slightly as we turned to go.

"Yes, Dad."

"Be careful."

"Don't worry, Chief," Alice assured my dad. "I'll take good care of her and Jasper's driving us home so she'll be safe."

" Thanks, Alice," my dad smiled.

With that, the little pixie dragged me from the house and into her car. We were supposed to meet up with Rose at the Cullen's and then Jasper would be driving us into Port Angeles. We would have a late dinner, just us girls, and then head over to the bar around 10:00 where Jasper and Emmett would join us. I had no idea what Edward would be doing tonight, but I assumed that he would not be joining us.

Dinner was fantastic. I had really wanted a big plate of pasta, but it's kind of hard to eat pasta when you're wearing skin-tight jeans and a top that shows off so much skin without feeling like a complete cow. Instead, I opted for a grilled chicken salad with vinaigrette. Two bottles of wine later we walked down the street, Alice on one side of me, Rose on the other. Our arms were linked and we were giggling about absolutely nothing. I really missed girl time. I'd been so wrapped up in being a mommy that I forgot about this part of life. We got to the bar and pushed our way through the crowd to get ourselves some drinks.

"Well hello, lovely ladies," the bartender smiled at us. "My name is Garrett and I will be taking care of all your needs this evening."

Rose snorted. "My needs are being taken care of by my husband thank you and my sister-in-law's will most likely be taken care of by her boyfriend. Bella, however, just might need your assistance."

I felt the tips of my ears warming and knew I was blushing.

"Rose!"

She and Alice just giggled and Garrett winked at me before taking our drink orders.

"So explain to me this Riley situation, Bella," Rose demanded.

"Uh, well," I stuttered a little before she continued.

"You said he was your boyfriend and yet I get the feeling that he's not really."

Garrett set our drinks down in front of us and I took a large gulp before answering. I had always called Riley my boyfriend, because it was easier than explaining what we were.

"Riley is my best guy friend. He's been there for me whenever I needed him. We're….."

"Serious?"

"No."

"Dating?"

"Kind of."

"Fucking?" I hesitated before answering.

"Occasionally."

"So he's your booty call," she stated.

"Some might call it that, but it's more. I love him and he loves me."

"But not romantically."

"It's really complicated."

Rose nodded and looked thoughtfully at me for a moment. "So, if you wanted to hook up with someone tonight, would you be able to?"

"Yeah, sure, I guess so."

"And what would that mean for Riley?"

"That's really up to him. If it was a one-night stand and I didn't make a habit out of it, he'd probably be fine with it. He's hooked up with a few girls over the years so…."

"But if it turned into something more?"

"Riley and I would go back to being platonic friends, like we were before."

"You honestly think you both could do that?" Alice asked as she wrinkled up her nose in doubt.

"I think so. I mean _I_ could. That's always been our arrangement."

Rose and Alice looked at each other and then back at me. "Well you've gotten it fucking made then, girl," Rose cheered as she raised her glass to me.

Alice and I busted out laughing. Just then, as I was looking at Alice, her jaw dropped and her face went ghostly pale. I turned to see what she was looking at and was greeted by the guilty faces of Emmett followed by Jasper. Right behind them was Edward.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me," I groaned as the guys approached us.

Alice grabbed my hand and yanked me towards the dance floor before they reached us.

"What the hell are you doing?" I asked her.

"I'm getting you away from him. This was not supposed to fucking happen. I told them to leave him at home!" she screeched.

I turned back to look at the guys again and he was watching me. The look on his face as he scanned my body told me that he was a little surprised, but then our eyes locked. His were predatory. I could see him breathing deeply, his lips slightly parted, as if he were trying to control some unseen force that was encouraging him to attack. I remembered that look. It was the same look he gave me as he stalked across the bedroom towards me. He smirked and I saw the tip his tongue slip out of his mouth to wet his full lower lip.

I turned back around and took a deep breath, blowing the air out loudly. When I looked up Alice was staring at me with an amused smile.

"What?"

She chuckled and shook her head lightly. "Nothing."

"Don't start Alice."

"Maybe you just need to get laid," she grinned.

"I'm just fine thanks," I said as I tried to slyly glance at Edward again.

"You're not as furtive as you think you are, Bella. Just stop looking at him."

"I'm not….." I trailed off and bit my lip as Alice raised her eyebrows. "Shut up."

We started dancing and pretty soon Rose had joined us.

"Did you talk to Emmett?" Alice asked.

"Yes."

"And?"

"He said they couldn't shake him, although honestly I'm not sure how hard they tried."

Alice rolled her eyes. "I should have known better. Jasper said he doesn't want to fight with him. He's afraid he'll say something he's not supposed to."

"And Emmett is just too much of a softy."

"It's not that big of a deal, guys," I added. "I'll manage."

"But now you'll be on edge all night. That's not what I wanted," Alice whined loudly.

"Get me another drink and I'll forget all about it," I laughed.

The night went on without incident. Edward watched me, but never tried to talk to me. A few times he brushed up against me as he headed towards the bar or the bathroom. He danced with a few girls, but never long enough for them to get the idea that he was interested. I tried to completely ignore him, but obviously failed. I figured as long as it looked like I was ignoring him then I wasn't too worried.

"Now there is a fine piece of man meat right there," Alice whispered into my ear nodding towards a table on the other side of the dance floor. "And he appears to find you fascinating."

I looked towards where she nodding and grinned widely as I recognized the tall, dark, and handsome staring me down. I squealed in delight and bounded over to him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Demetri!"

"Why hello, my Bella," he said with a slight accent, kissing me on the cheek.

"What are you doing here?" I slurred a little.

"Felix," Demetri said nodding towards his brother who was dancing with a gorgeous brunette.

Demetri had been adopted from Russia at the age of twelve by a family who lived in Port Townsend. There were four kids: Felix, Demetri, Heidi, and Chelsea. Heidi was four years older than us, Felix and Demetri were both my age, and Chelsea was only seventeen. The boys had attended UW and were in a few of my classes my junior and senior year. They both knew about Charlie and had helped entertain him when I needed to study for a big test or write a paper. Heidi and her boyfriend, now husband, had gotten pregnant her junior year of college and had a little boy so the guys had seen how hard it was. They were happy to help. I always thought that Demetri had a bit of a crush on me, but he never acted on it so maybe I was wrong.

"How's your boy?" he asked.

"Um." I hesitated, looking to see where Edward was. When I spotted him near the bar I answered. "He's good. Thank you."

Demetri tilted his head. "What's wrong, my Bella?"

"Uh…um. Well, his father is back in town."

"Charlie's?" Demetri asked a little shocked. I nodded. Demetri knew some of the story. That Charlie's father was my best friend's brother and that things had not been good between us. He knew that he left and had never seen Charlie.

"How's that going?"

"He doesn't know yet."

"Doesn't know what?"

_Oh shit. I only told Demetri that Edward hadn't been a part of Charlie's life, not that he didn't even know he existed._

"Oh God, Demetri," I groaned.

Demetri looked at me for a minute before understanding registered in his eyes.

"Holy Shit, Bella, you never told him?"

"I never got the chance," I defended. I knew it was a weak excuse, but the last thing I needed was to feel even guiltier. "He's there," I said quietly. "By the bar."

I saw Demetri scan the bar and a rumble sounded in his chest as Edward looked over and they made eye contact. They were sizing each other up and it was making me uncomfortable. I grabbed Demetri's arm and pulled him to me.

"You can't tell him. I'm working my way up to that."

"So what, you're rekindling your relationship first and then you'll spring it on him?" Demetri asked.

"Ha. No," I scoffed. "We never had a relationship to rekindle."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"It was a one night stand," I explained

"I thought you said he was your best friend's brother." "He is. She's over there," I pointed towards Alice who was dancing provocatively with Jasper.

"It's a really long story, Demetri and I don't want to talk about it. I'm not rekindling anything with him." I slid a couple of fingers into the waistband of Demetri's jeans and pulled him a little closer to me. I smiled seductively up at him and he grinned back down at me.

"You and Riley still an item?" he asked as he pushed my hair behind my shoulder and trailed his thumb over my jaw.

"You know our deal," I smiled and bit my lip. One less drink and I probably would have recognized that I was being a bit of a whore, but I was drunk, and people do stupid shit when their drunk. Like seducing their friends. I really needed to stop drinking.

I could feel Edward's eyes on me as I dragged Demetri onto the dance floor. Alice winked at me and my hands began to stray, exploring Demetri's toned chest, abs, arms and back. I could hear whimpering moans escaping his lips at my touch and it spurred me on. Somewhere in the back of my head a little voice told me to stop, but I completely ignored it. I reached around and grabbed the back his neck roughly before pulling his face close to mine. I placed my forehead against his and stared into his eyes for just a moment before his lips crashed down onto mine. As firm as the kiss was, he didn't try to force his tongue into my mouth. He gently slid his tongue against my bottom lip to ask permission, which I granted before slipping mine out to meet it. I told you I had a hard time keeping my body parts to myself when I was drinking. And where the hell was Alice to keep me out of trouble? We were startled from our foreplay when a loud crash sounded from the bar followed by yelling voices.

I didn't need to look to see who had caused the commotion. I could hear him yelling at someone. He was distracted and I knew that I needed to take my chance if I wanted to slip away without him noticing. " Let's go," I ground out, dragging Demetri down a dark hallway that led to the service exit. He held tightly to my hand and followed me silently. The cool night air hit me and it felt amazing against my skin. Once the door shut behind us he pulled me back and twirled me around roughly so that I was facing him and then resumed kissing me. This time he wasn't as polite and jammed his tongue down my throat, but I didn't really care. He lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he walked me backwards.

He pressed my back up against the concrete and was nipping at the spot just below my ear. I felt his tongue slip out and lick the spot just before his lips pressed firmly and he started to suck. I moaned and shifted my hips against his, feeling more of him than I had ever anticipated. My breath quickened as he continued to suck on my neck. I knew what he was doing, but I was too drunk to care.

Just then, the back door slammed open, startling both Demetri and me. He dropped me to my feet and stood in front of me, guarding me from the intruder. My hands went to his biceps as I pressed myself against his back. I could feel his body tense as his muscles flexed. It would have been even more of a turn on had the voice not completely taken me off guard.

"Get away from her," the voice spoke acidly.

"Fuck you, she doesn't belong to you," Demetri barked.

"She's my friend and I'm not going to let you take advantage of her."

"Take advantage? Bella?"

"Go away, Edward," I hissed as I stepped out from behind Demetri.

"I'm not looking to be saved."

Edward completely ignored me and spoke directly to Demetri. "My friend is drunk and doesn't know what she's doing. I suggest you find someone else to play with."

"Friend? Really? So, where have you been for the last four years, cause she really could have used a good _friend_ to help her out. Things haven't exactly been easy for her and yet you, her _friend,_ weren't anywhere to be found," he sneered.

_Okay, too close. This discussion needs to be stopped immediately._

"Demetri," I warned.

He seemed to realize what he had said and turned to face me with an almost frightened look on his face.

"Christ, Bella. I'm sorry. I'm just…..going to….go."

"Hey, don't," I whispered as I put my hand on his forearm. Demetri looked at me apologetically and started to go back inside.

"Are you going to be okay?" he asked from the doorway.

"She's going to be fine," Edward growled.

Demetri disappeared and I shook my head feeling the effects of the alcohol. I wobbled a bit and felt Edward's hands on my arms.

"Get the fuck off of me!" I snarled.

"Jesus, Bella, what the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that I was going to get a little stress relief. What the hell were you thinking?"

"You were going to fuck some random guy in a bar?" he scoffed loudly

"Not that it's any of your business, but Demetri isn't some random. I've known him for two years."

"So that makes it all better? God, what happened to you to turn you into this?

"This?" I asked, my voice growing louder. I couldn't believe that Mr. Manwhore Extraordinaire was going to lecture me on my sexual activity.

"You let him mark you?" he shouted as he fingered the bruise on my neck. What the fuck, Bella?"

"You want to talk about marking me, Edward? Really?" I yelled back.

Somewhere in the background it registered that the back door had opened again and I could hear Alice's voice, but I was too angry to listen.

"You fucking marked me permanently. You have no idea. I turned into _this_, because of you. "

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

I opened my mouth to let him know exactly how he had marked me when I felt a firm arm wrap around my waist and large hand cover my mouth. " You don't want to do this Bella," Jasper's low voice whispered in my ear. " Not here. Not like this."

Emmett had grabbed Edward and was having a heated, but fairly quiet, discussion just out of my earshot. Alice grabbed my hand and pulled me back towards the service door where Rose was standing. She ushered Alice, me and Jasper inside quickly and left Emmett and Edward in the alley.

"You need to get her out of here," Rose hissed. Alice nodded and she and Jasper flanked me on either side as we made our way through the crowded bar towards the front door. I saw Demetri who was watching me leave. He gave me a small smile before looking away again. Alice and Jasper hurried me out to Jasper's car and shoved me into the backseat. Alice was about to climb into the front passenger seat next to Jasper when I let out a shuddering sob. She turned to look at Jasper and then slid in next to me, wrapping her tiny arms around my back and holding me close.

"Shhhh, Bella, it's okay," she cooed. I didn't respond, but instead just let the sob rack through me until I was too exhausted to cry anymore. After a few moments of silence I lifted my head and wiped my eyes.

"That was really fucking close," I whimpered.

"No shit, Bella, what were you thinking?" Alice sighed.

"Uh, I wasn't. I was horny and then I was annoyed and then I was angry. And he started spouting off about what a horrible person I was because I wanted to have sex with Demetri."

Alice squeaked. "He did what? You've got to be kidding me."

"He just pissed me off. I can count on one hand the number of guys I've been with. He'd need freaking Ganesha to count all his conquests and that was before he even finished high school." Jasper chuckled loudly and Alice let out a little giggle.

"All right, Bella, let's just get you home. Hopefully this will all blow over by tomorrow."

I groaned just thinking about the fact that I would have to face him again tomorrow. At least this time I'd be prepared for it…and I'd be sober.

"Were you really going to have sex with that guy in that dirty alleyway?" Alice asked.

"Well that's where I very quietly thank your cockblocking brother for keeping me from making a huge freaking mistake. Where the hell were you by the way? Weren't you supposed to have my back? I told you I did stupid shit when I was drunk."

Alice giggled again and I could see Jasper shaking with silent laughter. "Sorry, sister, I thought you were joking. Next time I'll take you seriously."

"Yeah, whatever," I grumbled.

The rest of the car ride was quiet. Alice and I cuddled up together in the backseat and I dozed off a few times before we finally pulled up to my house. I didn't want Charlie to get a contact drunkenness from the amount of alcohol fumes that were seeping from my pores so I just crashed into the sofa and fell into a deep sleep complete with drooling.

The next morning, my dad made no attempt to be quiet as he slammed cabinets and banged plates. I'm pretty sure that he did it on purpose because there is no reason that my dad needed to open and close the cabinet six times in a five minute time period. It really wasn't funny, but he had a big innocent grin on his face when I finally groaned and rolled off the sofa. I dragged my feet into the kitchen and poured myself a cup of coffee.

"Wow, Dad, that was a lot of noise for a cup of coffee and a piece of toast," I grunted as I sat down.

"Oh I'm sorry, Bells, did I wake you?" I could see his mustache twitching as he tried to suppress his laughter.

"So not funny, Dad, I'm going to take a shower."

The hot steaming water helped to massage away most of the hangover fog, but my gut still ached from both the encounter with Edward last night. I didn't know when I would tell him, but keeping Charlie a secret was only going to get harder the longer he was here.

XXXXXX

Later that afternoon I stepped tentatively out my car and simply stood in place. After a few minutes I heard Charlie calling for me to unbuckle him, but I was still too nervous. I grabbed my phone and to text Alice.

Me: We're out front.

**Alice: He's not here come on in.**

I pulled Charlie from the backseat and set him down. He went screaming to the front door at full speed. He climbed up on the stool that Esme had put out front so that he could reach the doorbell and pressed it. Several times. Emmett slowly opened the door with a mischievous grin on his face.

"Who's ringing my bell?" he said looking just over the top of Charlie's head.

"Me! Me! I did, I did," Charlie said jumping up and down and giggling.

"Huh? Who's Me?" Emmett asked. He looked up at me and winked and I couldn't help but laugh.

"It's me, Emmie, Charlie."

" Charlie?"

"Uh huh."

"Well get in here then, boy," Emmett growled and swooped Charlie into his arms flying him away into the house and leaving a laughing Esme at the door waiting for me.

"Hi, Bella," she said warmly.

"Hi, Esme," I responded, giving her a one armed hug and a kiss on the cheek and handing her the fruit salad that I had made.

As we started into the house, Esme wrapped her arm through mine. We reached the family room and I saw that the massive wall of windows that faced the backyard were completely open, making it appear as though there was no boundary between the inside and the outside. There were people milling about here and there. A few of them appeared to be older friends of Esme and Carlisle's, probably from the hospital. I spotted Emmett and Charlie outside with a few other kids who looked to be similar in age, maybe a few years older than Charlie. Emmett was entertaining them fully with machine gun noises and pretend bomb explosions. I smiled and shook my head. Esme let go of my arm.

"Make yourself at home, sweetheart. Let me know if you need anything."

"Thanks, Esme."

Just then I felt tiny little arms slip around my waist from behind and I laughed when the slender hands with the blue painted fingernails wiggled up at me to wave hello.

"Hello, Alice."

She kept her arms wrapped around me and rested her chin on my shoulder. "Hiya, Bella. Where's my boy?"

"He's playing with Emmett," I said pointing to where the giant ape of a man was rolling around on the grass with a bunch of preschoolers.

"Ah, yes. Well I suppose it's about time he acted his age."

"Who, Charlie?" I asked a little confused.

"No, Emmett." I busted out laughing and Alice let go of my waist so that she could stand beside me.

"You sure he's not going to be here, Alice?"

"Oh no, he's going to be here, but not for another couple of hours. He said five, but we'll get Charlie out of here by four just in case."

"Well, we might just leave at three then."

"Uh, no Bella, you're staying. Your Dad is going to take Charlie home.

_What?_

"What?" I looked at her incredulously.

"Well I think it would be a good idea for you and Edward to be in the same vicinity of each other for a little while, you know, feel each other out, before you actually tell him about Charlie."

I snorted, loudly. "I think Edward and I have done enough 'feeling each other out' Alice. That's what got us into this mess to begin with."

Alice smacked my arm.

"That's not what I mean and you know it," she grimaced.

I sighed. "Alice, I know, I'm sorry, but I really don't think that's a good idea."

"So you're just going to show up one day and say 'surprise, Edward, you're a daddy'?"

_Uh, I hadn't really thought that far in advance._

"I don't know, but I'm not sure I can just play nicey nice with him, especially after last night."

" Please, Bella? I really just want you to stay and have a good time," Alice looked at me with her big blue eyes and batted her eyelashes. He lower lip was pushed out in a pout and I was completely powerless.

Another sigh.

"All right, but if he starts any shit, I'm outta here."

"No, if he starts any shit, he's outta here," Alice beamed.

I rolled my eyes at her, but I couldn't help the nagging feeling that she was right. I had to build up some kind of rapport with Edward before I blasted him with my news.

Alice let go of her embrace and grabbed my hand.

"Come on, let's go get a drink. "

I let her drag me to the cooler next to the grill. There was a wide assortment of beers. Everything from canned Vitamin R and imported to fancy smancy microbrews. I picked out a bottle of microbrew and stood up only to have Jasper, who was suddenly standing right in front of me, pop the cap off quickly.

"Thanks," I said in a surprised voice.

Jasper grinned at me. "No problem. I see that Emmett has finally met his match."

I turned to see Charlie pinning Emmett to the ground and bouncing up and down on his stomach. Emmett was putting on quite a show of being completely overpowered by his 3-foot tall, 30-pound nephew. I chuckled lightly and then pulled my lower lip in between my teeth. " I have to admit, it's kinda nice knowing that Charlie has all this family that love him." Jasper raised his eyebrows at me. " Just…kinda nice?"

I smiled and looked down at the ground before looking back up at him again.

"Okay, so it's really nice. I just never thought…"

"I'm just teasing you, Bella. You have no idea how much we all love that little boy over there. It's kinda amazing how, in such a short time, it's hard to imagine our lives without him."

"Just kinda amazing?" I teased. Jasper laughed and wrapped his arm around Alice's shoulders.

Alice cleared her throat and looked up at Jasper. She was holding her still capped bottle of beer out in front of her. Jasper's eyes widened for a minute.

"Jesus, I'm sorry, baby," he jumped as he popped the cap off her beer with the church key.

"Uh huh. I see how it is," she griped, winking at me.

I watched as Carlisle swept in and grabbed Charlie off of Emmett's stomach and lifted him up into the air, tossing him around. Charlie giggled hysterically. Carlisle looked over at me and jerked his head to the side, indicating that he wanted to talk to me. As I approached him he set Charlie down on the ground. Charlie promptly ran off.

I smiled and watched him go as Carlisle reached his arms out to give me a hug. " Hello Sweetheart." " Hi Carlisle," I said, letting his arms wrap around me securely.

"Bella?"

"Hmmmm."

"I have a question to ask you." I tilted my head up at him and then pulled away so that I could see his face better. He kept one arm around my shoulders, his hand resting on my upper arm.

"What's up, Carlisle?"

"Uh….I'd like to…. Uh….introduce Charlie as my uh….grandson," he choked out.

"Umm…okay."

"I just didn't know how you would feel about that." I smiled at him affectionately.

"Carlisle, he is your grandson. You are welcome to tell anyone you like."

"I just, uh, didn't want to assume…."

I looked into Carlisle's clear blue eyes. He was so sincere, I simply could not deny him.

"I guess the only question is will any of these people have a chance to talk to Edward?"

Carlisle's jaw tightened a little. "You've got a point, Bella, maybe we should wait until the next party."

"I'm sorry, Carlisle."

"No, you're right. The last thing you need right now is one of my acquaintances or colleagues congratulating Edward on a child he doesn't know he has," He smiled sadly. "I can wait a little longer, Bella." He kissed my cheek and then took my arm, escorting me back to the party.

"I should go and find Esme," he said as he scanned the yard.

"Of course. And I should make sure Charlie is behaving himself."

Just then I heard a squeal that I knew was distinct to my son. My head shot up.

"Grampa!" Charlie yelled as he went streaming across the yard straight towards my father who had just appeared. My dad caught the flying bundle of boy and held him close in a tight hug. I followed and met them, giving my dad a kiss on the cheek.

"Hi, Daddy," I smiled.

"Hiya, Bells. How's everything going?" He asked as he tried to inconspicuously check out the party guests and then set Charlie down.

"He's not here, Dad. If he was, Charlie and I certainly would have disappeared already."

My dad just nodded I saw a smile grace his lips as he spotted Alice, who was motioning for him to join her next to the beer cooler. She was playfully waving a can of Vitamin R at him. He looked over at me in question.

"Go ahead, have a good time."

"What time, Bells?"

"He's going to here by five."

"We'll head out at three then. Just in case."

I could help but giggle. I was most certainly my father's daughter.

The rest of the party was pretty uneventful. The kids played, the adults drank, ate, talked, and laughed. True to his word, at three o'clock on the dot my dad picked up Charlie. They made their rounds to say goodbye.

"I love you, mommy," he said with a giant yawn.

"I love you too, baby," I kissed his nose and he rested his head on my dad's shoulder.

"If he falls asleep, don't let him sleep more than an hour please, Dad. I don't want him up too late tonight."

"Sure, Bells. Be careful this afternoon."

"I will, Dad," I placated.

A few hours later I was standing on the patio deep in thought when I felt warm air caress my ear and I shivered. I could feel him right behind me, the heat from his body providing an unfortunately nice protection from the cooling evening air.

_He's not supposed to affect you this way Bella. Tell him he's too close._

"Hello, Bella," his smooth voice wafted over me. I was torn between being incredibly turned on and unbelievable annoyed. I closed my eyes and bit my lip. I breathed in deeply, trying to regain my composure before speaking.

"Edward," I responded, my tone clipped. I stepped forward before turning to face him, doing a quick sweep of the yard. I knew that my dad had left with Charlie over an hour ago, but it still made me nervous that it had come even that close.

Edward tilted his head. "You look nervous."

My eyes snapped back to his.

"What would I have to be nervous about?"

He smirked and proceeded to rake his eyes over my entire body.

"You look lovely this afternoon."

Ugg. Seriously. First of all, hadn't we just gotten into a major fight last night? I mean, screaming and swearing and shit? And now he was being all nice and sweet, and sexy and….

_Oh shut up, Bella!_

Secondly, I was beginning to think he had a completely different idea of what happened four years ago than I did. Maybe he had just been too wasted to remember. Was it possible that he thought that what we had done had been…..I don't know, better? I mean, parts of it had been AMAZING. Up until he nearly ripped me in half anyways. And I wouldn't trade Charlie for the world. He was my life. But Edward was behaving as if we had parted on good terms, as if we were friends, not with him glaring at me as he realized I had lied to him about my sexual status. Okay, I didn't really lie, because he never asked, but I certainly hadn't told him.

"I'm sorry about last night. I didn't mean to uh….interrupt."

He looked at me sheepishly. "I just didn't realize that you knew the guy and I didn't want him taking advantage of you in your state of drunkenness."

_Oh the irony._

"Really, Cullen? That's your argument? "

I stared at him for a few minutes with wide eyes, my head tilted and my arms crossed in front of me.

He started to nod before he made the connection. He groaned, closed his eyes and threw his head back as I smirked at him.

"Shit, Bella, I didn't mean to…..I didn't realize….that night was…"

"Terrifying? Humiliating? Life Altering? Yeah, Edward, it was all of those and more. And guess what? I was far more drunk then, than I was last night. And you insinuating that I'm a whore for hooking up with a guy I've known for years is downright hypocritical."

Edward ran his fingers through his hair and tugged a little in what looked like frustration. "I know, I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say."

I don't know why I did it, but I decided to throw him a bone. " It's fine Edward. I probably should be thanking you for stopping that. Demetri and I have been friends for years and sex would have probably really screwed that up." He looked up at me and gave me a little smile before his brow wrinkled again.

"Bella?"

"Hmmmm?"

"We need to talk."

"Isn't that what we're doing?"

I knew what he meant, but I wasn't sure I was ready to go there. But I suppose I needed to go there. Crap.

"Take a walk with me?"

I looked around at the dwindling party and saw that Alice and Jasper as well as Esme and Carlisle were all trying to inconspicuously watch my interaction with Edward.

"Okay." We wandered in silence down to the trees that bordered the Cullen property and onto a path that lead to a little creek. This was his show. I needed to hear what he had to say. After a few minutes I heard him sigh loudly and then, with a deep breath, he started to talk.

"Bella, I am so, so sorry."

"You've said that."

"No, I apologized for last night. I never apologized for…..that night."

I kept my eyes trained on the ground and waited for him to continue.

"I, I didn't know you were a virgin. God I can't even imagine. I was so rough. I never would have…"

"Fucked me, Edward? You never would have fucked me if you had known?"

I knew I was sounding harsh, but he was pissing me off a little. He shook his head.

"I don't know, Bella. Maybe I still would have. I can't really go back there. I just remember wanting you so badly. I was so fucked up I couldn't control myself. You were there and you were willing." He stopped walking abruptly and grabbed my arm turning me to face him.

"Did you not tell me on purpose? "

"Wait, what?" I was starting to get confused.

"Did you not tell me that you were a virgin, because you were afraid that I wouldn't fuck you if I knew?"

My eyebrows nearly lifted past my hairline in disbelief. "Are you kidding me?" I howled. "You are un-fucking believable."

"I had to ask Bella. Girls tried that you know."

"I wasn't one of your stupid harpy sluts, Edward. I was not looking to lose my virginity despite what Alice may have thought. I was fucked up and _you _came to _me_. I didn't grope you or kiss you until _you _demanded it. I never would have touched your disgusting skanky ass if I had been sober so don't even try to put that on me."

Edward stood in front of me completely speechless. His mouth was hanging open and a pained expression lingered in his eyes before he looked down at the ground.

"Ouch," he muttered almost to himself.

Okay, so I probably wasn't being entirely truthful in my statement. I had more than noticed Edward throughout our younger years, but he was always out of my league and I couldn't stand how he was with girls. It was revolting to me how he was constantly sticking his dick in anything with tits and a pussy, but I believe that it's possible to be disgusted by a guy's behavior without being disgusted by the guy himself. I had seen Edward at his best, at home with his family where he was the son and the brother and the best friend. Being off the female menu for him allowed me access that none of his girls ever got. I may not have ever actively sought him out, but I had wanted him that night. After he started toying with me, my lust for him had nearly consumed me, but I wasn't about to tell him that now.

We started walking again in total silence until Edward spoke up again.

"When did Alice find out?"

"A couple of weeks ago."

"How did that topic of conversation come about?"

_Oh shit! How do I answer that question?_

"I don't really remember." I shrugged.

He narrowed his eyes at me, but left it alone.

"And everyone else?"

"They all know, Edward."

"Jesus, Bella, how in the hell does that even happen?"

"Alice."

It was the only explanation needed. He understood completely. Well, maybe not completely, but close enough. A few more minutes of silence passed.

"Will you tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

"What I did to you?" he said in almost a whisper.

I stopped walking again and offered him a twisted smile. "What do you mean?"

He sat down in some grass on the bank of the creek and patted the space next to him.

"Jasper and I got into an argument last night after the bar. He made some accusations. I told him that I was there and that I remembered. He asked me how you reacted afterwards. He asked me what happened when you woke up the next morning. It made me realize that my family probably knows more about that night than I do. That's kind of sad, Bella." He swallowed and I was mesmerized by the bobbing of his Adams apple.

I started to chew on my bottom lip.

"What are you thinking?" he asked sincerely.

"I'm trying to figure out the point. Why do you care?"

Edward placed his hand on my arm and I had to fight to not yank it away. I had spent four years remembering the asshole he had been that night. I was not prepared for the gentleness that he was showing me now.

"I care because it's one of the biggest regrets of my life, Bella. I never meant to hurt you. That morning, when I found out, I…..I was devastated."

I started laughing. "You could have fooled me."

"Don't laugh, Bella," he grimaced. "You have no idea."

"No Edward, you're right, I don't."

"Will you tell me what happened that night? From your point of view?"

"Belllllllla!" I could hear Alice's voice.

"Bella!" Jasper was joining the interruption.

I looked up and saw Jasper running towards me with Alice a little way behind him. The look of panic on their faces told me that something was wrong. I stood up quickly.

"What?" I asked, trying not to jump to conclusions. "What's the matter?"

"Charlie." Jasper panted. His eyes were narrowed so that I understood which Charlie he was talking about. My son.

I started running back towards the house with Jasper at my side. "What happened?"

"I don't know. You need to get to the hospital."

"I'll drive you, Bella," Edward said from right behind me.

"NO!" Jasper, Alice and I all shouted at the same time.

Edward abruptly stopped running, but we were already approaching the house so he was still able to keep up. I didn't even want to look at his face. I knew that there would be questions, but I just couldn't deal with them at the moment.

Carlisle and Esme were in the house and Carlisle already had his keys in his hand.

"Let's go," he said quietly.

"I'm going too," Alice announced.

I turned around briefly and saw Jasper wrap his arm around Esme's shoulders. She had tears slipping down her cheeks and I saw her silently sob. Emmett had Rose in his arms and his lips were pressed against her temple. And Edward? Well Edward looked really fucking confused. He was surveying his family just as I was, but he was missing a very crucial piece of the puzzle. I felt Carlisle's hand on my elbow and I let him lead me out the door. I didn't know what to expect when I reached the hospital. All I knew was that my baby boy needed me and I would move heaven and hell to be there for him.

XXXXXX

**AN: Yeah, so Bella nearly got herself into some trouble. You would think that after her experience with Edward that she would have learned her lesson, but seriously. How many times did you go drinking, do something stupid, swear you'd never do it again, and repeat yourself the next weekend? That's what I thought! Plus, she's in complete emotional chaos at the moment. She's just not coping in a healthy manner.**

**Details of Riley and Bella's relationship do come out eventually, but it's a little bit down the road. It's not a huge part of the story, definitely not something to put a whole lot of thought into, but it's something that I have to deal with.**

**Next week is a mixed chapter. It's mostly EPOV, but BPOV needed to be in there so we see what happened to little Charlie. We see the club, the barbeque and Edward's argument with Jasper. And for those of you who wondered….you were right, Forks is a very small town! Reviewers get a teaser.**

Recs this week:

**Marble and Mahongany by letmesign**: This one is kind of an oldy, but a goody. It was completed a year ago, but is one of my favorite vampire stories. Bella was created by Aro and used as his shield for decades, but she wants more out of her afterlife. She eventually makes her way to Seattle in an attempt to go to college, but her bloodlust is hard to control. When she meets the Cullens, they are willing to help, but Aro isn't willing to give up his favorite progeny just yet. That is only the tip of the iceberg on this story. I highly recommend it. And there is no waiting for updates!

Until next week...


	7. Small Town Gossip

**AN: Oh Dear, I certainly didn't expect the response that I got from my last chapter. First off, I apologize if I caused anyone serious stress regarding Charlie's condition. We do find out what has happened to him in this chapter. Second, thank you, thank you, thank you for all of the amazing reviews. You all can't even imagine how much it means to me that you are liking what I'm doing here.**

**I know that I have some repeated dialogue here and I am going to try and not do this too often, b/c I really don't like doing it, but in this case, I think it's important to hear what Edward is thinking during the conversations.**

**The storyline is mine, everything else belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Thank you Mollie, for beta'ing. :oD **

XXXXX

Chapter 6: Small Town Gossip

EPOV

I really had no idea what was going on. Three days. Three fucking days was all it took for Bella Swan to completely re-invade every single one of my senses. Okay, well if I was being honest it took less than three days, but I digress; she was there. She had become a gorgeous, feisty woman who made her own decisions and wasn't afraid to put me in my place. When Emmett and Jasper had said they were going out on Friday night, I knew she would be there and I questioned them until they relented.

XXXXXX

_"Edward, come on. All it's going to do is make her uncomfortable and it's going to get us in trouble," Emmett whined._

_"I'm not going to do anything, Em. I'll leave her completely alone, but seriously, it's Friday night and I don't want to be stuck hangin at home with Mom and Dad."_

_And I wanted to see Bella again._

_"I don't think it's a good idea," Jasper muttered._

_I glared at him for a second before grabbing my wallet. "Did she say she didn't want me there?" I asked petulantly._

_"No," Emmett muttered. "But the girls. . ."_

_"They'll get over it, okay? What happened between Bella and me is between Bella and me."_

_They grumbled, but acquiesced._

We got to the bar in Port Angeles and I felt a slight twinge of nervousness. I had promised not to mess with Bella so if I wanted to be invited on any more group outings, I needed to behave myself. Fuck me if the moment I saw her I didn't want to break that promise, though. I thought I would jizz myself like a fifteen-year-old boy right there and then.

Her ass was smokin in red denim with these gorgeous black heels that made her legs look ten miles long. I couldn't really see her top because her hair was cascading over her shoulders, but I could tell she had a little more skin showing than I ever remembered seeing, other than when I had her naked and in my bed of course.

Bella turned and looked very much surprised and more than just a little bit irritated to see me. I saw the fury in Alice's eyes as she grabbed Bella and moved her towards the dance floor.

Rose didn't even have to say anything to Emmett, she just glared at him.

"Baby, I swear we tried."

"Save it, Emmett," Rose snapped before turning to me. "Edward, I swear, if you fuck with her, you will be finding pieces of my shoe up your ass for the next year."

"Yeah, yeah, I gotcha, Rose," I placated, but my eyes were still on Bella. I couldn't believe the little girl who blushed over the mere mention of a blow job was looking like sex personified. I let my eyes roam over her, feeling the tightening in my pants. When our eyes met I literally felt the urge to pounce on her. Jasper's not-so-subtle clearing of his throat brought my attention back to the fact that I didn't yet have a drink and I was definitely in need of a drink.

For the next two hours I simply watched her. I kept my promise and didn't even try to talk to her, but I occasionally felt an overwhelming need to touch her so I'd brush up against her on my way to the bar or the bathroom. There were a few girls who showed interest and I danced with them a little, but they didn't hold my attention very long. Most likely because I couldn't stop thinking about Bella.

And then I saw her in that douchebag's arms. He was close to her and she was whispering to him. His eyes lifted and met mine. I wanted to punch his fucking face in at the smug look he was giving me. When she started dancing with him and touching him I was seeing red. I knew I had no claim to her, but I sure as hell wanted one. And when she kissed him I exploded, throwing my glass against the wall.

"Hey, Fucker, what was that for?" The bartender barked.

"Mind your own fucking business!" I yelled back.

"You destroying my property _is_ my fucking business."

I kept yelling profanities at him until he threatened to kick me out. I looked around and that's when I realized that she was gone. I scanned the whole room and didn't see her anywhere. I left the bar with the bartender still yelling at me and approached Alice.

"Where'd she go?"

"No, nuh uh, Edward. Leave her alone. She's just trying to have a good time," she said shaking her head furiously.

"How do you know she's not in trouble? She was drunk and that dude was all over her."

Alice just looked at me with an annoyed expression before pointing to the hallway that led to the service exit. I slammed open the door and saw Bella pressed up against the wall by the guy she had been dancing with. Her legs were wrapped around his waist and his tongue was doing exceptionally obscene things to her mouth. I had no idea why it made me so angry. I hadn't seen this girl in four years, I'd only been with her once. Prior to that, she was simply my sister's best friend. Right? I wasn't supposed to feel so protective over her,….but I did. He dropped her and turned towards me, shielding her behind him.

"Get away from her," I spat.

"Fuck you, she doesn't belong to you."

_No she doesn't, but I want her to._

The thought caught me off guard, but I held myself together.

I called her my friend and accused him of taking advantage of her. I knew that I was stretching it. It appeared as though Bella hated me.

The look on the guy's face was a combination of exasperation and humor. I really wanted to hurt him.

When Bella told me to go away, I ignored her. I couldn't even look at her because I knew that I was completely out of line, but it was almost like I had no control over what I was doing.

"My friend is drunk and doesn't know what she's doing. I suggest you find someone else to play with."

He grit his teeth and seethed at me. "So, where have you been for the last four years, cause she really could have used a good friend to help her out. Things haven't exactly been easy for her and yet you, her friend, weren't anywhere to be found."

What the hell? What has she been through? She looks perfectly fine to me.

Bella gasped and I could hear the warning in her voice as she called him out. "Demetri!"

The fucker's eyes went wide and he apologized profusely. For what, I had no idea. He turned to leave but had the gall to ask if she was going to be okay with me.

"She's going to be fine," I snapped. I'd known Bella almost half of her life, who was this fucker to ask such a stupid question.

He finally left and I turned back to Bella, who looked like she was going to faint. I grabbed her arms to steady her.

"Get the fuck off of me!"

I reluctantly let her go, but I was starting to get a little pissed. I knew that what I had done to her was horrible, but this was ridiculous. She was insanely angry. After four years, she shouldn't have been that angry, should she?

When she shouted that she was really was trying to bone the guy, I stared at her in shock. The Bella I had known was young and innocent. How was it possible for sweet little Bella to turn into someone like that? Screwing a stranger behind a bar was something I would have done, not her.

I couldn't help but respond in anger. "You were going to fuck some random guy in a bar?"

Of course she wasn't. He wasn't a stranger to her. I had been gone for too long. I didn't know the same people she did anymore. Yes, it did make it better, it made her better than me, but I was too prideful to back off, even asking her what had happened to turn her into "this". Big fucking mistake.

"This?" She screeched, turning her head to the side.

_Oh shit, what did I just say?_

And then I saw it. A big fat juicy bruise right along her jugular. I remembered the day Mike Newton gave her a hickey. It was the end of our junior year. She had come into the cafeteria after what I could only assume was a pretty hot and heavy make out session. I was sitting at a table with the usual crew. Tanya was sitting on my lap filing her nails and I was talking to Emmett about baseball or something. My head shot up when I heard Alice squeal. She had Bella's neck tilted, pointing out what Mike had done. Mike was standing behind Bella with a smirk on his face. I smiled as I saw Bella turn bright red and then flat out laughed when she turned around and decked him. Then she growled. "I am not your fucking possession, don't you ever fucking mark me again."

That was the day I discovered that Bella Swan hated hickeys.

So why in the hell would she let this Demetri guy do that to her?

"You let him mark you? What the Fuck, Bella?" I demanded as I reached out to touch the bruise.

Bella looked like she was about to explode. She put her hand against her neck and then started screaming at me.

"You want to talk about marking me, Edward? Really?"

The thick metal back door slammed open and Alice started yelling Bella's name. Jasper, Emmett and Rose were right behind her.

"You fucking marked me permanently. You have no idea. I turned into this," she said motioning over the length of her body, "because of you. "

"Bella, stop!" Alice screamed.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

Before she had a chance to answer I saw Jasper wrap his arm around her, pulling her into him and covering her mouth. I wanted to scream at him to let her go. I wanted to force him to back off so that she could explain to me what was going on, but I saw her face when Jasper whispered in her ear and that stopped me in my tracks. She looked afraid. Was she afraid of me? I clenched my hands into fists and I was shaking in anger and in frustration.

"Back the fuck off, man," Emmett growled behind me. I turned to face him.

"What the fuck is going on, Em? Why the hell is my family treating me like a predator and her like my prey?"

Emmett shifted uncomfortably and glanced over towards where Rose was shoving Alice, Bella, and Jasper back into the bar. Rose looked up at him and I saw the threatening look she gave

him and he recoiled a bit before mumbling.

"Dude, it's not my place."

I was tired of everyone saying that to me. Something had happened to Bella over the last four years. They all knew and they weren't telling me. Obviously she had told them something that I didn't know. I stomped away like a petulant little child, throwing the door open with way too much force. When I got to the main bar area I searched around looking for Bella. As my anger started to subside, I was starting to feel a little guilty about attacking her the way I had. I needed to apologize.

"She's gone," Rosalie sneered. "Thanks to you, our fun night out turned into a fucking nightmare and all she wanted to do was go home."

I felt my anger flare up along with annoyance, but I tempered it before responding.

"I never meant to upset her," I grumbled.

"Yeah, well, you did. Let's get the hell out of here. I'm done."

Emmett appeared at her side and I followed them out.

When we got home I ignored Emmett and Rose and went straight to my room, changing into a pair of plaid flannel pajama pants and then returning to the kitchen. I poured myself a glass of water and sat down at the island to wait for Jasper and Alice.

A few minutes later, they were there. Alice didn't even look at me, but I could still see the indignation all over her face. Jasper glared at me for a minute and I took my opportunity.

"Look, Jazz. I know you all are pissed with me right now, but I need to know what's going on."

He took two large strides towards me.

"You need to know what's going on, Edward? Really? Do you need a fucking recall of what you did to her?"

"I know what happened, Jazz. I was there!" I snapped.

"You do? So….. did she enjoy it when you tore into her? Did she cry out in pleasure? How was she afterwards Edward? And how about the next morning? Was she happy about what happened? Was she sore? Did she love it? Regret it? Just what were her feelings about her first fucking time_ brother_?" he sneered. I was stunned by his outburst. And even more stunned that I didn't know the answers to any of his questions.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," he said as if reading my mind. "Don't know, Edward?" He leaned into me so that he was only inches from my face. "Guess what?" he paused. "I do. I also know that you never held her, that you never asked if she was okay. She wasn't a fucking slut, Edward, she was Bella! And you just walked out on her like she didn't mean anything to anyone in this family."

My jaw must have hit the floor. I had no response. I wanted to punch him in his fucking mouth, but I couldn't. He was right. I had no idea and I was completely and utterly ashamed by that. Fuck, she was right. I _had_ marked her. I had been her first. Everyone remembers their first. I would always be known to her as the guy she lost her virginity to and I had made it a miserable experience for her. Shit! That's exactly why I didn't touch virgins. I needed to find out if there was any chance to fix this.

XXXXX

The next morning I didn't wake up until almost noon. And even then, I didn't really want to get out of bed. Unfortunately I needed to escape the house before the fucking barbecue started. I didn't want to mingle with my father's colleagues or anyone else for that matter. I had successfully avoided anyone that I might know for the last two days and I hoped to avoid it at least until I got back from Seattle.

I quickly took a shower and bolted from the house, telling Alice I would try to make it back by five o'clock for the end of her shindig. I spent the next five hours wandering around Port Angeles and then heading over to Clallam Bay to troll the beach.

Around four-thirty, I decided it was time to head back. I dragged my ass to my car and booked it back to my parent's house.

There were still quite a few cars there when I arrived, but I wasn't too worried. They were more expensive looking vehicles so I figured they were mostly my parent's friends. It didn't take me long to spot her. Bella was standing by herself on the patio. I approached her from behind, whispering my greeting in her ear and praying that she wouldn't turn around and punch me.

Her body tensed and she greeted me stiffly before turning to face me. Her eyes were darting all over the place and she looked incredibly nervous. I remembered the look on her face in the alleyway and wondered if she really was afraid of me. I wanted to put her at ease so I complemented her on how lovely she looked. And she did too. She was wearing a white sundress, her hair lazily pulled up off her neck in a jeweled clip. I can only describe the look on her face as one of disdain and possibly disgust. I was losing her fast. I needed to bring her back to me.

"I'm sorry about last night. I didn't mean to uh…interrupt," I admitted painfully. I wasn't actually sorry that I interrupted. In fact, I was seriously happy about having stopped whatever would have happened in that alleyway. I was sorry about the fight though. I was sorry that I had upset her so much and I was sorry that I had ruined her night.

"I just didn't realize that you knew the guy and I didn't want him taking advantage of you in your state of drunkenness."

That sounded like a good excuse right?

_Apparently not._

"Really, Cullen? That's your argument?"

She was looking at me with her eyebrows raised and her arms crossed.

And then it hit me. Fuck! That's exactly what I had done. I groaned in frustration and embarrassment. This wasn't going how I wanted it to go.

It was definitely time to apologize.

"Shit, Bella, I didn't mean to….I didn't realize…that night was….."

"Terrifying? Humiliating? Life altering? Yeah, Edward, it was all of those and more. And guess what? I was far more drunk back then, than I was last night. And you insinuating that I'm a whore for hooking up with a guy I've known for years is downright hypocritical."

She was right. I had nothing more to say, because I couldn't defend myself. I was a bastard and I knew it. I knew it then and I knew it now.

She then admitted that my interruption had been a good thing, but the little dig about how sex would have ruined their friendship, unintentional or not, hurt a little. Okay, maybe it hurt a lot. Not that we had ever really had a friendship to really mess up, but it fucked up whatever it was we had or could have had. That's what I had always been afraid of.

I asked her to take a walk with me and she agreed. I could see my family watching us out of the corner of my eye, but I ignored them as I led Bella down to the creek. She was quiet. She wasn't going to be the first one to talk, this I could tell. I took a deep breath.

"Bella, I am so, so sorry," I breathed.

"You've said that," she huffed.

She didn't get it.

"No, I apologized for last night. I never apologized for…..that night."

I was looking at her and wanting desperately for her to look back into my pleading eyes, but she wouldn't. She kept her gaze on the ground in front of her.

"I, I didn't know you were a virgin. God I can't even imagine. I was so rough. I never would have…." I couldn't finish my sentence. I didn't have to, Bella found her own ending.

"Fucked me, Edward? You never would have fucked me if you had known?" I winced a little at her tone. I wanted to be able to tell her 'no' that I wouldn't have. I spent years telling myself that I wouldn't have done it, but now that she was confronting me, I didn't know if that was the case. I know I wouldn't have fucked her like I did, at least not at first. I had never been known to be gentle so I probably wouldn't have been, but I wouldn't have tried to split her in two.

And then a thought crossed my mind. A really fucking stupid thought. Once it slipped out, I wished that I could take it back, but I couldn't. I asked her if she had not told me on purpose so that I would fuck her. I had essentially just accused her of being a whore. Again.

_God, could I be any more of an asshole?_

She laid into me like nothing I had ever heard or seen from anyone before in my life, telling me that she never would have touched my 'disgusting skanky ass'.

I deserved it, I knew I did, but that didn't mean that it didn't hurt. In fact, I don't think any girl, fuck, any person, had ever said such painful words to me. She had never wanted me.

I wanted to know how my entire family found out. One word explained everything. " Alice."

She never really did explain how Alice found out, but I knew my sister. She could get a mute to

spill his guts if she decided she wanted to know.

I needed to know what I had done to her. What it was like for her. How could I truly be sorry for what I did if I didn't even know what that was?

I asked her what she was thinking.

"I'm trying to figure out the point. Why do you care?"

Why did I care? She really did think the worst about me. I put my hand on her arm, half expecting her to pull away, but she didn't.

"I care because it's one of the biggest regrets of my life, Bella. I never meant to hurt you. That morning, when I found out, I….I was devastated." I would never be able to put into words what I had felt, and I didn't even know the full story. I knew that what I was asking for would completely crush me, but I deserved it. I deserved every fucking ounce of pain that I had inflicted on her.

I begged her to tell me, but before she could we were disturbed by Alice's shrill voice screeching from the pathway. She and Jasper were running towards us. Once again, they had interrupted at the most inconvenient of times. I was about to throw a fucking fit, but Bella jumped up. I noticed the panic on my sister's face and the concern on Jasper's. Something was wrong.

Chief Swan had been taken to the hospital. I offered to take Bella, but everyone screamed at me.

_That was really fucking weird._

I watched my father drive off to the hospital with Bella beside him and Alice in the backseat. The rest of my family looked on, completely despondent. I knew I was still missing a piece of the puzzle. I hoped that the chief would be okay, whatever had happened to him. Of course, I hoped he would be okay simply because he was Bella's dad, a good man, and I wouldn't wish injury on anyone, but I also hoped that he would be okay so that I could get Bella back to that place where she was about to go. I needed to have the answers to Jasper's questions. I needed to hear it from her lips.

BPOV

Carlisle raced us to the hospital reaching speeds that certainly shouldn't have been attempted on the streets of Forks, but we were there in record time. We all burst through the doors of the emergency room and Carlisle pulled his clout to get us all sent straight back to the little room where my father was pacing. A couple of doctors and nurses were surrounding my baby. Charlie had what looked like a tube sticking out of his mouth.

"Oh Jesus," I gasped, rushing over. "What happened, Dad?"

"I don't know. I only left him for a minute."

"Dad?"

"He's never gotten into there before, Bella. I don't even know how he got it open," my dad sobbed into his hands.

"Dad?" I shouted.

"I found him in my bathroom with an open bottle of my blood pressure pills. I don't know how many he ate, but he didn't look good. I didn't know what else to do so I just brought him straight in."

I looked over as the doctors were shoving fluid in through the tube and then sucking it back out. Alice was holding my hand tightly and Carlisle's arm was around my shoulders.

"It'll be okay, Bella," Carlisle whispered into my hair as he kissed my head.

"I'm so sorry, Bells," my dad was crying. I had only seen my dad cry once in my life and that was the day my mom left him when I was seven, but here he was, sitting down in hard orange plastic chair with his hands tented over his nose and big fat tears streaming down his cheeks.

I walked over and bent down in front of him, grabbing his wrists to pull his hands away so that I could look into his eyes. "Daddy, it was an accident. I understand that. It could have happened at any point. We just need to be more careful." My father's guilt was evident in his eyes.

"I should have been watching him more carefully," he sniffed.

"Maybe. But it's hard to keep an eye on him at all times, Dad. I know that better than anyone. Maybe it's just time to baby proof the house."

"I should have done that a long time ago, Bells."

"This is the first time we've actually lived with you for any significant period of time, Dad. Let's just, let's just get him better and then we'll figure out what needs to be done okay."

My dad nodded. A half second later, we all jumped when the doctors stepped away from Charlie and the nurses started pulling the tube from him.

The younger of the two, a guy whose lab coat read Dr. Johnson, approached us. He surveyed us and then took a double take at Carlisle.

"Hey, Dr. Cullen," he smiled. "Are you here with the Swan boy?"

Carlisle nodded. "He's my grandson."

"Oh?" Dr. Johnson looked surprised. "I didn't realize, I'm sorry."

"It's okay Steve. This is Bella, Charlie's mother."

"Chief Swan's daughter," Dr. Johnson stated. I nodded my head.

"Is he going to be okay?" I hiccoughed.

Dr. Johnson smiled at me reassuringly. "He'll be fine. We pulled four pills from his stomach. They were completely intact which indicates that he didn't really have time to digest them. It's a good thing Chief Swan got him here when he did." I looked over at my dad who still looked completely deflated.

"He's probably going to be pretty exhausted. We sedated him prior to the gastric lavage."

"Gastric lavage?" I asked.

"Pumping his stomach," Carlisle clarified.

"I would highly suggest a lock-box for your medicines, child locks on all of your cleaning supplies and chemicals as well," Dr. Johnson stated. "We actually see a lot of kids his age in here because they got a little too curious. Pills look like candy and some of those cleaning solution bottles almost look like juice. And I've seen plenty of kids who can manipulate the childproof caps so those aren't always a sure bet."

"I'd like to keep him here for observation until tomorrow morning, but he should be good to go first thing. Bella, you're welcome to spend the night with him. They're going to move him up to the pediatric ward in a few minutes and they have pull-out sofa beds."

"Thank you," I said quietly.

When Dr. Johnson excused himself, Carlisle, Alice, and my Dad followed me into Charlie's temporary room. I stared at his tiny little body laying motionless on the gurney. He was pale and looked so helpless. It was mere seconds before my emotions completely racked my body. I collapsed into the chair and started sobbing. I held onto one of Charlie's hands and ran my fingers back and forth over his chubby knuckles, silently thanking God for sparing my baby.

Alice ran soothing circles over my back as Carlisle and my dad talked quietly in the corner.

A few minutes later I heard Carlisle talking. "He's okay, honey. He got a hold of the Chief's blood pressure medicine. They had to pump his stomach, but they got everything out. No, he's going to be here overnight, but I think he just needs to rest. I'm sure you can just visit at their house tomorrow. Just tell him that there was an issue with some blood pressure meds and that you don't know the details. I know, honey. I will. I love you too. Bye."

About forty-five minutes later, they came to take Charlie to the pediatric ward on the third floor. Once he was settled, everyone said goodbye, kissing both me and Charlie before leaving. Carlisle stayed back.

"I hope it's okay that I told Dr. Johnson about Charlie," he said quietly. "I know we had decided to wait, but..."

"Carlisle, it's fine," I interrupted. "I completely understand. I've kept him from you long enough. I am going to tell Edward as soon as I can. He deserves to know and you deserve to be able to claim Charlie. I owe you that."

"Thank you," he smiled, kissing me on the cheek. "I'll be in first thing in the morning, okay?"

I nodded. "Goodnight, Carlisle."

"Goodnight, Bella." He leaned down and kissed Charlie on the forehead. "Goodnight, sweet boy."

And then I was left alone. About a half hour later, I heard someone clearing their throat and looked up to see a familiar figure standing in the doorway.

"Hi, Bella," she smiled gently.

"Hi, Angela," I smiled back.

Angela and I had been friends since Junior High. She had attended nursing school in Seattle and returned to Forks last year to work so that she could help her father, Reverend Weber, take care of her mother who was battling ovarian cancer. She had twin little brothers who were twelve and Angela was trying to make sure that they were able to continue living a somewhat normal life, despite their mother's illness. We had kept in touch over the years and often got together for coffee or lunch and the occasional night out whenever I would come home. She had known Charlie since the first summer that I brought him home. I knew she, like everyone else, had her suspicions that Edward was Charlie's father, but she had not once brought it up.

"He's getting so big," she said as she came in to check Charlie's vitals and fluids.

"I know. It's happening a lot faster than I figured it would."

"That tends to happen. I remember when the twins were his age. And now they're almost teenagers." She sat down next to me on the sofa and put her hand on top of mine, which was resting on my knee. "How are you holding up?"

I sighed loudly, letting a gust of air pass through my lips.

"I keep telling myself that he's fine, that he's going to be okay, but I'm just so scared. I don't know what I would do if something ever happened to him."

"You can't protect them forever, Bella. Things are going to happen, but right now he's going to be fine. Think of this as a learning experience and move on."

I looked at her and smiled.

"Thanks, Ang."

"No problem." She hesitated for a minute and I could see that she wanted to say something else.

"What's up, Ang?"

"I don't mean to pry, but, uh….was that Dr. Cullen I saw leaving a little bit ago?"

I chuckled.

"Yes, it was. I guess I should let you know how much I appreciated over the years that you never asked. I know you knew, but you let me have my privacy."

"So, he is?" She didn't even need to elaborate.

"Yeah. He's Edward's."

"I didn't know you two…."

"We weren't. It was an accident."

"An accident?" She lifted her eyebrows.

"I would call it a mistake, but if it hadn't happened, I never would have had Charlie and I can't ever call him a mistake. He's my life."

She nodded.

"I guess I can understand that. I just don't get how he could abandon you."

"He didn't, I never told him."

She gasped. "You….you didn't tell him?"

I shook my head. "Edward Cullen, Angela," I said as an explanation.

"I know, but don't you think he would have wanted to know?"

"Maybe. Hind sight is 20/20," I shrugged. "At the time I thought I was doing what was best for me and my baby. I didn't really think about how it would affect anyone else." There was a brief moment of silence and then she spoke again.

"So, obviously he knows now right? I mean, since his dad was here."

"Uh, no, not yet."

"Bella!" she scolded. Then she furrowed her brow. "How does he not know? That child is the spitting image of him."

"He hasn't seen him yet."

"Really?"

"Really. He just got back into town a few days ago and I'm trying to figure out how to tell him. It's not as easy as it may seem."

"Oh no, it _does not_ seem easy. I don't even have any advice to give. Good luck with that."

I laughed. "Thanks a lot."

"I should probably get to work, but I'll be his nurse for the night so just let me know if you guys need anything okay." She stood up and smiled at me before heading out into the hallway. I pulled a blanket out from the closet and lay down on the sofa, not even bothering to pull it out. Within a few minutes, I was asleep.

I woke up a few times during the night whenever Angela would come in to check on Charlie, but the night was uneventful. The next morning, Charlie woke up bright and early chatting exuberantly with Angela who just laughed. He seemed relatively unaffected by his situation. Ang said goodbye and introduced us to our new nurse, since her shift was ending at seven. My dad and Carlisle showed up about nine just to make sure that everything was okay. Carlisle was working all day on Sunday and Dad had driven my car and would be taking us home. At ten thirty, Charlie was released and we piled into my Volvo to head home.

We pulled up to my dad's house and Jake was waiting for us outside. I pulled Charlie out of his car seat and we were both immediately enveloped in Jake's warm arms.

"Jesus, Bells," he whispered. I nodded into his chest and tried to hold back the tears

"Not that I'm not happy to see you, Jake, but what are doing here?" I asked.

Jake looked at my dad.

"I asked him to stop by," my Dad said as we made our way into the house. "I need to run some errands. I'm going to head to the hardware store for some child locks and a childproof medicine chest. I called Mitchelson's in Port Angeles and they said they had them."

"Um, Dad, it's eleven o'clock on a Sunday morning. When the hell did you call the hardware store?"

My dad blushed and looked at me sheepishly.

"I kind of know the owner. He's an old fishing buddy. I called him this morning at home and he said they open at noon. Jake's gonna hang out with you guys while I'm out.

I didn't know how to respond to him. I was a little irritated that he thought that I needed help taking care of my child. I almost said something about the fact that it had been him that was supposed to be watching Charlie last night, but I didn't. My dad already felt guilty enough as it was and I was just tired and cranky. There was no reason to be a bitch.

He placated me with his next sentence though anyway. "I thought that maybe you'd want to take a nap. I know those hospital sofas aren't very comfortable. If you get tired and Charlie is still up, you can go lie down and Jake can look after him." My dad's face was hopeful I felt like a complete asshole. I smiled thoughtfully.

"All right, Dad. That's actually a good idea." I acquiesced. I was exhausted and I knew that I would have to nap at some point in the day, probably sooner rather than later.

XXXXXXX

EPOV

I was sitting in the family room trying to watch television, but my mom's pacing nearly killed me.

"Mom, just come sit down. Dad will call as soon as he knows something."

"I know," she sighed. She sat down on the sofa and curled her legs under her. I had to laugh. She was trying really hard, but I could see her checking her phone every minute or so as if she was going to somehow miss my father's call. Just as I was about to take her phone from her, it began ringing.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Hey, how are things going?"

I heard her humming at whatever Carlisle was telling her.

"Are they going to let him go home tonight?" she asked standing up and walking away from me.

I couldn't really hear the rest of her conversation as she was speaking in a hushed voice and she wasn't facing me. I didn't really think anything of it. It sounded like the Chief was going to be just fine. Maybe that meant that Bella would be willing to sit down with me before I had to head to Seattle tomorrow night. My mom got off the phone and came back to sit down next to me. Her lips were turned up in a satisfied grin.

"So Chief Swan's okay?" I asked.

"Yes he is. He had an issue with some blood pressure medication, but everything is sorted out. They're keeping him overnight for observation, but he should be fine."

"That's good."

I sat for a few more minutes before I excused myself and headed to bed. It had been a long day and I just wanted to sleep.

As tired as I was, it should have been a given that I would just crash, but I wasn't that lucky. I had Bella on my mind and I couldn't get her out. Images of her over the past ten years kept popping up behind my eyelids every time I closed my eyes and I couldn't sort through them. Silent snapshots of various ages and occasions. Eventually exhaustion did win out and I drifted into a painfully turbulent sleep.

XXXXX

The next morning I woke with a splitting headache. My sheets were twisted around my legs and I was sweating slightly. I groaned and rolled out of bed.

My mother was sitting at the island drinking a cup of coffee and looking over some paperwork that I'm assuming had something to do with her firm. "Where's dad?" I asked as I stumbled into the kitchen.

"He's at the hospital."

"With Chief Swan?"

My mom looked up at me for a moment with a blank expression. She blinked at me a few times and then looked back down at her papers.

"Uh, I think he was planning on checking in with him, yes."

I glanced up at the clock, noticing that it was ten o'clock. "Where's everybody else?"

"They're around. Alice and Jasper were down here a little bit ago, but I haven't seen Rose and Emmett yet. I made biscuits, help yourself."

I poured myself a cup of coffee and grabbed a biscuit from the warmer. I needed to get into Seattle at about four o'clock to meet a friend for an early dinner and get myself prepared for my meeting with some of the deans and a couple of instructors over the next couple of days. At around noon, I decided to head out figuring that it was always better to be a little early.

I stopped at the diner to grab myself some lunch and saw Chief Swan sitting at the counter. He must have been discharged fairly early. I was about to stop by and see how he was feeling when I overheard the woman next to him.

"How's that grandbaby of yours, Chief?" the elderly woman asked. "I heard you had to bring him into the hospital last night."

_Wait. What? Grandbaby?_

"He's doing okay, thanks. He got past the child resistant cap on one of my medications. Swallowed them down before I could stop him."

"Oh dear. Well I'm glad to hear that he's okay. That poor baby. Has Bella recovered yet?"

_Bella? What happened to Bella?_

"I suppose so, but I'm not sure she'll ever fully trust me to watch him by myself again."

_Holy Shit!_

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Bella had a baby? Bella was a mother. Things were beginning to make sense now. Everyone talking about how Bella had had a rough couple of years and things weren't easy for her.

"Oh, honey, Bella's a reasonable girl, I'm sure she realized it was an accident."

"I hope so. In any case, I'm headed to Port Angeles to get some of that childproofing stuff for the house. Even when Bella and Charlie eventually move out, I'm going to want to have the house safe for him."

_Charlie. Charlie is her baby. That's why everyone was so upset last night. It wasn't Bella's dad who was sick, it was her child._

I slid quietly towards the bathroom so that Chief Swan wouldn't catch me eavesdropping.

As I watched him leave after saying his goodbyes, a million questions passed through my mind. Obviously this changed things. I wanted her, yes, but now there was a baby and a baby's father. A boyfriend? I can't imagine that Bella had a boyfriend, not after that display at the bar. Unless it was that Demetri fucker. But if it was him, then why would he have left her there with me? Had she been married? Divorced? Maybe this baby had actually been planned. I hadn't even considered that Bella would have had relationships in college. Stupid, I know, but I hadn't really wanted to think about it. Had I done that to her? Is that what she meant? Had I completely ruined her? Turned her into a whore? Turned her into me? Oh Jesus, maybe she didn't even know who the baby's father was.

My thoughts were getting ridiculous and out of control and I had no answers. I needed answers. I needed to satisfy my morbid curiosity so that I could know that it hadn't been my selfish need to claim her that fucked her up.

I forgot about my lunch and headed to my car. I would go see her. I would sit her down and ask her to tell me what happened. I would apologize...again. This would be easy. Right?

XXXXXX

**AN: Okay, so I'm a tease. I'm sorry, but in all fairness, he at least knows about Charlie now. And yes people, if he really thought about it, he could figure it out, but he's arrogant and self-absorbed and he's a young guy. I have known too many guys, well people really, in my life who can have all the facts presented to them and still need to have things spelled out before they fully understand.**

******I know you are all getting extremely anxious for Edward to find out and he will, trust me, he will. It seems like a really long time for us b/c we've had to wait for weeks, but for B&E it's been less than 4 days.**

**Fic Rec:**

******La canzone della Bella Cigna by philadelphic: **Bella is an aspiring singer, Edward is a piano prodigy (aka vampire). The two make beautiful music together in more ways than one. When Bella is selected for a scholarship to study in Volterra, she has a chance to really make a name for herself, but she is at the mercy of her benefactor, the scheming, game playing vampire leader Aro. The prize he's holding over her head, her immortality. This is an amazing fic and the writer obviously knows her stuff when it comes to the world of music.  



	8. Confessions

**AN: Oh, Looky looky. An early update? Yes, my lovlies. This isn't much of a surprise for last chapters reviewers b/c I added my little plan as an extra bonus teaser, but you all have been hanging in there with me so long that I thought this would be a nice way to say thank you. This is REALLY long. 2-3K more words than normal, but it's essentially two chapters. I opted for longer b/c I think I would have been hunted down and murdered had you seen where I originally had it separated. LOL.**

**Thank you for all of the wonderful reviews. I wish I could kiss you all, but instead I think I've got something you might enjoy a little more. ;-)**

**Again, if you review and don't get a response from me within two days, please PM me. I've discovered that not all of my reviews are going to my e-mail. If I don't catch it immediately, then I don't know. Also, I can't reply to your review w/ a teaser if you're not logged in. I'm not ignoring you, I promise.**

**I really need feedback on this chapter so please leave a review!**

**Disclaimer: Story is mine, all else belongs to Stephenie Meyers**

**Chapter 7: Confessions**

EPOV

I knew how to get to Bella's house. Everyone knew where Chief Swan lived. It was kind of a necessity when throwing or attending parties in high school to make sure that you were at least 2 miles from the Chief's house. Plus, Alice had forced first Emmett and then me to pick her up multiple times in high school before her dad bought her that fugly old Chevy deathtrap.

I pulled up outside of the two story cape cod style house and noticed that two cars were parked in her driveway. First was a black Volvo XC90 and the second was a shitty old VW Rabbit. I could only assume that the Volvo was Bella's. I couldn't even imagine the Chief allowing his grandchild to _sit_ in the Rabbit, much less ride in it. As I passed by the two cars I saw a car seat sitting in the back of the Volvo.

I took a deep breath, realizing that it was, in fact, true. Bella had a baby.

I knocked on the door and heard heavy footsteps, definitely not Bella's. I looked around to make sure that I hadn't just overlooked the Chief's cruiser, but there was no sign of it.

The door opened and I had to take a step back.

Jacob Black was standing in front of me with what looked like a raggedy old stuffed dog in his hand and a blue and green baby blanket slung over his shoulder. His face was blank for a moment before it registered shock.

"Oh…..hey, Edward. Long time no see," he said as he looked behind him anxiously.

Hmmmm. Was Jacob the father? They had been close friends their entire lives, even I knew that. It easily could have turned into more than friendship.

_Shit!_

"Hey, Jake. Is Bella around?"

Jake shifted awkwardly from one large foot to the next. "Um, she's uh, taking a nap."

"A nap?" I asked suspiciously.

"She had a rough night last night."

"Oh, yeah, the baby. I heard about that. How is he this morning? " Maybe if I pretended like I was in the know, Jake would be forthcoming with more info.

His eyes widened and at that moment he seemed to realize what he was holding. He yanked the blanket from his shoulder and threw both it and the stuffed animal back towards the living room as he stepped outside and closed the door behind him."

"What…exactly….have you heard?" he questioned.

"The Chief was at the diner this morning. He said that Charlie got into his blood pressure medication and had to have his stomach pumped."

Jake nodded, but didn't say anything.

"That's it. I just thought I'd stop by and see if Bella needed anything."

"Well, she's fine. I'll tell her you stopped by."

He wasn't giving me an inch. He turned to walk back into the house, but I stopped him."

"Jake?"

"What?" He turned to face me.

"Is Bella married?"

He guffawed loudly and then covered his mouth, glancing at an upstairs window. I can only guess it must have been Bella's and he was trying not to wake her.

"No, she's not married," he answered with a chuckle.

"Was she?"

"Nope. Never," he shook his shaggy head.

"Boyfriend?"

"Uh, I guess you could consider Riley her…..boyfriend. Why?"

_Riley. Riley._

"Oh. Is Riley Charlie's father?" I asked trying to sound innocent. " You know, I just got back a couple of days ago and haven't gotten all the details yet," I added quickly. I didn't know if Jake knew that I was lying, but it was worth a shot.

"You know, Edward, Bella is an extremely private person. I don't really feel comfortable talking about this. When she wakes up I'll tell her you stopped by." He took two large steps towards the house and shut me out.

Now I had a name. Riley. But if Riley was her boyfriend, then who was Demetri?

Shit. Now I was leaving with more questions than I had started out with and I was out of time. I had to leave for Seattle.

I raced home as quickly as I could in hopes that I could catch my mom or sister before I left. I wasn't quite sure why I cared so much, but I had had her. As stupid and reckless and wrong as it was, she had finally let me touch her. She had marked me too without even trying or realizing. I had spent years denying what she made me feel that night. I wasn't just trying to get off. I was acting on years of repressed emotion towards the one girl who would not have me. I thought that maybe once she had given herself to me that I would get over it, but it had done the exact opposite. I had never felt guilty for fucking a girl. NEVER. Until Bella.

The moment I set eyes on her again I wanted her. I wanted her to let me breath her in, to touch her smooth skin and taste her sweet lips. I thought that we were getting somewhere at the barbeque, that maybe she would forgive me for what I had taken from her. For being so selfish, but the past few hours had flipped everything upside down.

_She has a baby. She has a baby. She. Has. A. Baby._

Fuck me, the news just shattered me. Why would she hide something like that? And Jesus, why did I still want her? I should be running for the hills. I wasn't one for drama. Tanya had provided me with enough drama to last a lifetime. The fucking cow just couldn't let me go. She did everything she could think of to try and keep me including sticking pins through the condoms to try and get me to knock her up. The day I caught that bitch with the needle in her hand, working her way through the pack of Trojans in my bedside table was the only time I had physically _wanted_ to hurt a woman. It had taken all of my strength as I threw her out of my apartment not to fuck her up. I hadn't seen her since, but I knew that she had dropped out of school and returned to Washington. I just hoped that I never ran into her, because I'm not sure what my reaction would be.

I threw open the door and stormed into the kitchen. I began slamming things around unceremoniously until someone came into the kitchen. Unfortunately, the one who answered my mini-tirade, was the one I would get the least amount of information from.

"What the fuck are you making so much noise for?" Rosalie's annoyed voice sneered.

"Where's my mom?" I growled.

"She's out."

"Alice?"

"What am I, the family day planner? I'm the only fucking person in this house right now besides the asshole making too much fucking noise in the kitchen so I repeat myself, what the fuck are you making so much noise for?"

"Did you know Bella had a kid?"

Rosalie opened her mouth quickly as if she were going to make some nasty retort, but then her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped. She just stared at me as I quirked an eyebrow in question. She regained her composure quickly and once again, the cold mask that was Rosalie Hale Cullen returned.

"Where did you hear that?" she asked.

"I overheard some old biddy talking to Chief Swan at the diner this morning about his grandbaby. _Bella's_ baby. Jake just confirmed it for me not 20 minutes ago."

"It's none of my fucking business, Edward."

"Does everyone know?"

Her lip curled up into a smirk. "Apparently we all do now."

She started to walk away, but I stopped her.

"Rose?"

She turned to look at me. "Talk to Alice, Edward."

I had less than half an hour before I needed to leave for Seattle. If I was going to talk to my sister it was going to have to be by phone.

"Dammit," I muttered to myself.

I climbed back into my car, set up my Bluetooth and dialed my sister.

"What's up?" she answered.

"Hey, Allie. I'm just leaving the house to head up to Seattle."

"Oh, okay. When are you going to be back?"

"Tuesday night I think. I have meetings on Monday and Tuesday. I was going to stay the night and head home on Wednesday, but I'm thinking I want to come back sooner."

"All right, well, drive safe."

There was a moment of silence. It was now or never. I had to ask her.

"Why didn't anyone tell me that Bella had a baby?" I blurted.

I heard a sharp intake of air and then the phone rattled and crashed like she had dropped it. A few seconds later she was back on the line.

"I'm sorry, what was that? she asked.

"You know what I asked, Al. Why is it this huge secret?"

"I'm not sure that it is a huge secret, Edward. I mean, everyone knows."

I was getting a little irritated. She knew that I had been kept in the dark.

"Apparently everyone but me," I growled.

"Jesus, Edward, you've only been home for four days."

"Is this my fault?"

Alice choked and started coughing.

"How would this be your fault exactly, Edward?" she asked.

"I don't know, Allie. Did I completely fuck her up? Did she turn into some mega-slut because of what I did?"

"Mega-slut?" Alice laughed.

"I mean, I see her all over that Demetri fucker at the bar and then Jake tells me about this Riley dude who is her _kind of_ boyfriend. Seriously, Alice, does she even know who the father of her kid is?"

I could hear my sister breathing heavily through her nose. It was a tell tale sign that I was pissing her off.

"Yes, Edward. She knows _exactly_ who the father of her child is."

I sighed in relief.

"Is he good to her?" I asked quietly

"Huh?"

"The father? This….Riley guy?"

Alice snorted a little.

"Riley is extremely good to her. The father, well, that's a little more complicated."

So Riley wasn't the father. I wasn't sure whether to be elated or annoyed. On the one hand, she wasn't permanently attached to this guy, but on the other hand, Alice said that he was good to her, which meant that they were more than just friends. And what the fuck does "a little more complicated" mean?

"Do we need to fuck him up? Is he a deadbeat?"

I would seriously do it too and I'm sure Emmett would back me up. I could just imagine this fucker abandoning Bella to fend for herself with his kid.

"Look, Edward, when you get back, you can ask Bella all these questions. But you have to understand that Charlie's father is not a deadbeat. Bella has never asked him for anything and she doesn't want anything from him."

Her statement once again flared my irritation. How does a dude have a baby with a girl and just walk away?

"Fine, whatever. I'll just have to wait. I gotta go."

"Drive safely, Edward. Give us a call when you're heading back to town."

"Okay sis. Love ya."

"Love you too."

I called my Mom to tell her that I was off, but I didn't mention the situation with Bella. I had already confronted two of the women in my family and I just wasn't up to having the same discussion with my mother. I spent the entire drive considering the information that I had and wondering where it left me. Did I still want to try to make amends with Bella? Unequivocally yes. Was I still aching for her, despite the fact that she had a kid and a "kind of" boyfriend? Painfully. Did I feel an overwhelming urge to protect both her and her baby? Absolutely. Was I going to do something about it when I got back to Forks? Uh...

BPOV

"Bella, we are out of time. He knows you have a kid. You really need to talk to him before he hears it from one of the local gossips."

Her words were killing me. I knew that it was going to have to happen, I knew that he deserved to know, but Christ, I sure as hell wasn't ready to tell him.

"God, Alice. I'm not sure I can do this," I whimpered. "Can't I just run away?"

I was met with silence. After a few seconds, that felt like years she finally spoke.

"You could, Bella."

_What? I was kind of joking._

I was stunned by her reply. I should have known that there would be a caveat.

"You could, but he _will _find out that Charlie is his and I can guarantee that he will not rest until he finds you. You think that he's going to be mad now? If you run, there will be no mercy, and I don't know that I could or would stand behind you, protect you from the absolute fury that he will bestow on you. And I think that goes for everyone else too."

I took several deep breaths. This was not news to me. I had always known that if I ran, he would follow. Even if he didn't want anything to do with Charlie, he would want to confront me for my deception.

"Do you know how hard it's been for us to keep this from him, Bella? Do you have any idea how much it feels like we've been betraying him? We're trying to support you, but if you run, that's it."

"I know, Alice, I'm not going to run, but that doesn't mean I don't want to. And I really do appreciate that you guys are letting me do this, I'm just really fucking scared."

"I realize that, sweetie, but this needs to be done, like yesterday. I, for one, can't hide it anymore. I won't. He's coming home tomorrow night. He's already asking questions."

"Do you think he suspects?" I interrupted frantically.

"No, I don't. He thinks Charlie is a infant. He thinks it's his fault though."

I was seriously confused. If he didn't suspect that Charlie was his then why would it be his fault?

As if answering my unspoken question Alice continued.

"He thinks that because of what happened between the two of you, that you, uh, um."

"Spit it out, Alice."

"That you might have become a slut, or in his own words a 'mega-slut,' " she said quietly.

"A WHAT?" I practically screamed. "Of all the self absorbed, arrogant, piece of shit things to assume."

"Jesus, Bella, calm the fuck down. Look, he saw you with Demetri and Jake told him about Riley, he just jumped to conclusions. He knows something is up, but he can't figure it out."

Jake had informed me that Edward had stopped by asking questions while Charlie and I were napping. He was genuinely surprised that Edward already knew about Charlie….as was I, but apparently my secrets were no match for small town gossip. After a huge freak out moment, I was able to re-collect myself enough for Jake to inform me that he didn't think Edward knew anything, because he asked if Riley was the father. He also let me know that Edward asked if I was married. This led to me bent over in hysterics for a good ten minutes, with Jake imitating my behavior and Charlie staring at us like we were stark raven mad. Which, of course, we were.

"So, we're going to need a plan," I groaned. "I'll come up with something and let you guys know."

"Okay, but let us know ASAP please. It's tomorrow though right? Either you do it, or we do it."

"I know, I'll do it tomorrow," I conceded.

I hung up the phone and instantly felt like vomiting. My heart was in my throat. In just a few days Edward would know that I gave birth to his child and never told him. I didn't know what his reaction would be. I had seen so many sides to him that the possibilities were endless. I wasn't deluding myself into believing that he wouldn't be completely pissed off. If there was one thing I was absolutely sure about, it was that, but how would his anger manifest itself? I had no idea. And I had very little time to prepare myself.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, feeling my heart beating erratically. Two days. I could do this. I could. I think.

XXXXX

On Tuesday night, I sat nervously in the Cullen's living room pretending to watch a rerun of Mythbusters. Esme was standing at the island feeding Charlie a bunch of grapes, some cheese and helping him color his new spiderman coloring book. My feet were resting in Jasper's lap and he was massaging them roughly to try and calm me down. It felt absolutely amazing, but regardless, I could still feel my back teeth aching from grinding them together. No one spoke, but I could feel the tension in the air when the sound of a car engine approached the house.

"Esme?" I whispered so quietly I wasn't sure if she could hear me.

"I know, Bella, we're going," she answered, picking up Charlie. Carlisle joined her as they left for the rec room in the basement. The front door opened and Edward stepped inside, shaking rain from his hair, hanging up his coat and taking off his wet boots. It had been raining most of the day. It's like Mother Nature knew what I was going to be doing tonight.

"Hey," he said as he walked into the room. I knew everyone else was looking at him, but I just couldn't bring myself to meet his gaze, which I could feel boring through me.

"Good trip, bro?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah, it was pretty good," Edward sighed as he reached out and smacked Emmett's hand in a lazy high five greeting sort of thing.

Jasper continued his ministrations on the soles of my feet. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. It was much easier to feel relaxed with my eyes closed. He worked his way through my toes, tugging on them before using his fingertips to massage down from tip to base. Then he work his way across the pads of my foot on into my arch, where he rubbed the tendons that stretched their way down the middle. Finally he used his thumbs to knead my heel. It was almost erotic. I bit my lip and inhaled, I might have even moaned a little…..or a lot, but I immediately felt guilty for coveting my best friend's boyfriend's mad skills in the art of foot massage. My eyes shot open and I could see a hint of a smile on Jasper's lips, but he continued to stare at the television. Alice wasn't even trying to hide her delight in the fact that her man was causing porno sounds to escape me. She was staring directly at me and then her eyes shifted to Edward who was squirming in the chair across from me. She giggled a little, but I could tell there was so much more just below the surface.

"Oh, just let it out, Alice, you know you want to," I groaned. She exploded into full-bodied laughter, shortly followed by Jasper and Emmett. Rose wasn't laughing, but she had an extremely amused look on her face. When I finally took a brief moment to examine Edward, he was certainly not laughing, or smiling. His brows were furrowed, his eyes were closed and he almost looked like he was in pain.

Emmett stood up and reached his arm out for Rose. "Come on, baby, Bella's moaning is making me horny," he laughed.

Rose just shook her head and grabbed his hand, allowing him to pull her forcefully to her feet. He made eye contact with me and winked. Rose nodded at me and they made their way up the stairs.

I knew they wouldn't be far away. That was the best plan I could come up with. Be close enough to come to my rescue should I need it. I know, I'm really fucking brilliant sometimes. A few minutes later, Alice and Jasper would make their way out of the room and Edward and I would be "alone" to talk.

We continued to watch Mythbusters for a little while before Jasper squeezed my feet to let me know it was time. I dug my heels into his thighs. He gasped and looked up at me, mouthing the word "ow" and grimacing. I clamped my jaw shut and shook my head minutely. Jasper ran his hands over to tops of my feet, up my shins and around my calves in his continued attempt to soothe me. I looked over towards Edward again and noticed that his gaze was fixed on Jasper's hands and in turn, on my legs. He was snapped out of it when Alice stood up and stretched, yawning loudly.

"I'm tired," she announced. "Jazzy, I know you are enjoying making Bella writhe around in pleasure, but if you want me to do any writhing of my own, I suggest you follow me shortly."

Edward groaned and made a disgusted face.

Alice smiled at me and kissed my cheek as she whispered softly in my ear.

"It will all be okay, Bella."

I nodded and scraped my teeth over my bottom lip almost violently.

And then, the pixie was gone. Jasper gave my feet one last pat and shifted them onto the sofa.

"All right, sugar," he grinned at me. "My lovely girl has just threatened me and I believe it is time for me to go." He stood up and leaned into me, kissing my cheek just as Alice had before disappearing.

Edward and I sat in silence for a few minutes as I built up the nerve to talk to him.

"How was Seattle?" I finally asked.

"Not too bad. Kind of interesting."

"How so?" I was stalling. I knew I was stalling. Did he know I was stalling? No, he had no idea what I was about to tell him.

"I guess I never really thought of it as a real option because it's not Ivy League or anything, but it actually seems like a really good program. I talked to two deans, about four instructors and a few students. I was…..impressed."

He looked over at me and smiled.

"So, what do you think you're going to do?" This was an important question for me. One of the reasons that I had never told Edward about Charlie was because I was afraid that he would have been forced to give up everything he wanted out of some sense of obligation. I was once again finding myself in a similar position. I had no idea how things would work if he decided that he wanted to go back East again. Who was I kidding? I had no idea how things were going to work out anyway.

"I don't know. It's a solid option. It's a good school and my family is here. I certainly wouldn't regret it."

I nodded slightly and returned my focus to the television. Or at least I pretended to. We remained silent for a few more minutes before I heard him take in a deep breath.

"So...," he said nervously.

I just looked over at him expectantly and lifted my eyebrows in question.

"Can we talk?"

He was looking at me again and I knew that it was time. I nodded slowly.

"Uh, I….at the barbeque," he stuttered.

"I know what you want to know, Edward," I sighed.

He swallowed hard and once again I was drawn to the movement of his Adam's apple. I closed my eyes and rolled my neck, feeling it crack with tension.

"Will you tell me?" he whispered.

"Where do you want me to start?"

"Do you remember everything?"

"I think so. Do you?"

"Almost everything. Some things are a little fuzzy."

"I don't remember anything after you went into the bathroom."

I had always assumed that I had fallen asleep, but now that he was sitting here and we were talking about it, I began to question whether or not that was the case.

"You were asleep when I came out," he confirmed.

"And you just….left?"

His eyes conveyed pain and regret as he nodded.

"I didn't know what to do. We weren't supposed to do that. It was easier to leave than to have to face you." He paused briefly and started again.

"Did I hurt you?"

I clenched my jaw and looked down, nodding very slightly. I heard his breath hitch.

"How bad?"

His voice was shaky and he looked like he was getting a little bit agitated.

I looked at him and narrowed my eyes in confusion.

"I've never hurt anyone before, Bella. I need to know exactly what I did."

I could feel my eyes beginning to sting from the memory.

"I, uh, when you e-entered me, you must have broken my hymen."

"I don't need the fucking clinical talk, Bella. I'm not an idiot, I know what happens when a virgin has sex," he snapped.

His tone was harsh and I flinched back a little and then I got irritated.

"I….I…"

Edward rolled his eyes and groaned. "This is ridiculous," he said, his voice getting uncomfortably loud. "Just tell me!"

At that moment I saw red. Why the fuck was he yelling at me? Two seconds ago he was acting all sweet and remorseful and now he was annoyed and angry.

"Fine, Edward. You really want to know? I suppose I'll just fucking tell you then." I leaned forward so that I was only inches away from his face and spoke lowly. "When you slammed your cock into me, it was the most painful experience ever, even to this day, and considering I squeezed a nine pound baby out of that tiny hole, that's saying something. As your dick invaded me over and over again, what should have been an amazing experience became my worst nightmare. While you got your pleasure from my body, I was crying and praying for it to end."

I leaned back to survey and saw what I was looking for. He had a horrified look on his face; and then I continued. "And when I woke up in the morning all by myself, I was covered in blood and bruises made by _your _hands. I snuck out of your house, went home and showered. And then, I vomited for a half hour straight. I felt like a fucking whore."

"Oh my God," he said in a strangled cry.

The pressure that was building behind my eyes exploded and I could feel the tears streaming down my cheeks.

"Fuck, Bella, I..I never meant for that to happen. I am so fucking sorry," he sobbed.

I wiped the tears from my eyes and watched his as he let them fall. He was looking down towards his hands that were resting on his lap. I wanted him to feel bad. I _needed _him to feel bad, because I was about to completely crush his world.

"I couldn't face you after that," I mumbled. "I went to college and I moved on."

He lifted his head and our bloodshot eyes met.

"You had a baby," he said somberly.

I nodded. "I did. Charlie. He's my life."

"I'm sorry, Bella."

I laughed. "Alice told me that you were worried you had turned me into a slut."

Edward looked mortified. "Why would she tell you that?" he whimpered.

"Don't worry your pretty little head, Edward, You may have made me feel like one, but I certainly have never been a slut."

He sighed but I couldn't tell if it was a relieved sigh or an annoyed sigh.

After a few more minutes in fairly comfortable silence I decided it was time.

"Edward?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"There's something I think you need to know."

EPOV

"There's something I think you need to know?" she said as she stood up.

She reached out to me and I hesitantly took her hand and let her pull me. We were standing inches apart. I hovered over her. She was looking up at me and I could swear that she actually looked afraid-and sad. So sad.

"What is it, Bella?" I asked as I brushed a strand of hair away from her face and tucked it behind her ear. I let my palm linger on her jaw and I could feel her lean into it a bit.

_Please, beautiful girl, tell me how to make it better._

She closed her eyes. "Come with me."

I followed her across the room and towards the basement. "Where are we going?" I asked confused.

She didn't answer me, but continued to hold my hand as we descended. When we got about half way down I could hear voices. I heard my mother and then my father and then I heard a giggle.

"Charlie's here?" I asked.

Bella turned to face me and bit her lip. It would have been cute had the anxiety not been clearly written all over her face.

_Why is she anxious?_

She nodded. "I think you should meet him."

"Okay."

I had no idea why, but I really wanted to meet him. From the moment I found out that Bella had a little boy I could picture him. I didn't know what his father looked like, so I imagined that her baby looked just like her. I wondered if he was crawling or walking, maybe calling her 'Mama'.

We reached the bottom of the stairs and Bella turned to me again. She had tears falling down her cheeks again as she spoke.

"I am so, so very sorry, Edward," she cried softly.

I narrowed my eyes at her. "For what?" I asked as I followed her into the rec room.

I looked up and saw my mom and dad sitting on the floor putting together a puzzle with a little boy. They both looked up at me with wary gazes. My mother put her hand on the little boy's shoulder and his head shot up towards us.

"Hi, Mommy," he grinned.

"Hi, baby," Bella smiled back at him.

My heart absolutely fucking stopped. This was Charlie.

_Charlie isn't a baby. Charlie isn't a baby._

Charlie had bronze hair that stuck up in every direction. Charlie had startlingly green eyes. Charlie looked exactly like... Oh shit!

"Fucking Christ," I gasped.

"Edward!" My mom scolded.

"Bella?" I croaked. "Bella, please don't…." I couldn't even finish my sentence. My words simply got caught in my throat and I was completely unable to process the scene in front of me. Before my brain kicked in I felt Bella pulling me back up the stairs and out the back door onto the patio. I was trying to breath, but I couldn't get in enough air. The rain had stopped, but the air was still thick with moisture.

"What the fuck was that?" I yelled when I could finally fill my lungs properly.

"Oh God, Edward, I am so sorry," she whimpered.

"Sorry?" I bellowed. "Sorry about what, Bella? What exactly are you sorry for?"

She stayed quiet and backed away from me.

"Was that Charlie, Bella?" I asked a little quieter.

"Yes," she whispered.

"How….how old is he?"

"He was three in April."

I was trying to do the math, but my brain wasn't working. I counted three times in my head before I finally broke down and used my fingers. August, September, October. I hit April as I reached my ninth digit. I did it again. And again. And again. Until it finally sunk in.

_Are you fucking kidding me?_

"Oh Jesus. Oh Fuck. Please don't. Oh God, Bella," I sobbed. "Why? Why? Why? Please tell me it's not. Tell me he's not."

She was biting her lip again. Her eyes were red, her cheeks tear stained and she was trembling.

"He's yours, Edward." Bella's voice was so timid that it almost didn't sound like her. But it was her. And she was telling me that...no, she couldn't be telling me that. She was lying. She had to be lying. There was no way. My blood boiled in pure, unadulterated fury. I could feel the heat as my skin began to burn. I needed to lash out before it cooked me from the inside out.

"NO HE'S NOT!" I roared. "HE'S NOT FUCKING MINE. YOU'RE FUCKING LYING." I stepped towards her, drawing myself up as tall as I could. Where as moments before it had been a protective stance, it was now a threatening one. She was not going to fucking do this to me. I didn't care what that kid looked like, he was not mine.

"This can't be happening. I fucked you once, Bella. ONCE!" I screamed. "I don't know what you're trying to pull, but it's not going to work."

I towered over her and Bella stumbled backwards, falling to the ground. I heard the door open and the rustle of clothing and footsteps. I turned to see Jasper, Alice, Emmett, Rose, and my father all standing about 10 yards behind me. This had to be a fucking joke. I stared at them, waiting, but no one was laughing. They were all looking at me with pensive expressions. Anger and confusion dominated over any other rational thought or emotion that I had experienced in the past week. This is what they had all been hiding from me?

"Why would you even do this to me?" I cried, grabbing my hair and tugging on it roughly. "Why are you saying this?"

Bella was crying, but I didn't care. The inferno that was threatening to consume me was out of control. I couldn't have stopped it if I wanted to.

"He's not mine, he's not mine, he's not mine," I chanted over and over again. I felt myself rocking back and forth on my heels.

"Edward, I..."

"NO! Don't. Don't say another fucking thing to me," I glared at her. "I know what you want. I know what you're looking for. You fucking got yourself knocked up and now you want my family to take care of you? That's not happening, Bella. You're not getting a fucking dime out of me. Go find his real father if you even know who it is."

"Edward, stop!" my father yelled.

I turned abruptly, leaving Bella whimpering on the ground and stormed past my family. "Don't let her fucking fool you. That kid is not mine."

I heard my family shouting profanities at me as I ran out the front door, slamming it behind me and jumping into my car. I revved the engine before pealing out of the driveway and down the street. I couldn't think. I didn't want to think. I could feel my chest tightening and I gasped for breath. If I didn't know any better I would have thought I was having a heart attack. It hurt. It _really_ fucking hurt. And all I wanted to do was make the hurt go away.

I had no idea where I was going. I had nowhere _to_ go. I hadn't reconnected with any friends yet. It was Tuesday night; there were no clubs open. There were bars however, and I needed a fucking drink. No, fuck that, I needed to get plastered. I made it to Port Angeles in less than 45 minutes and pulled into the parking lot of Hannigans.

"Whatcha looking for, hon?" the chick behind the bar purred. I looked up at her. She was kind of hot. Shoulder length jet black hair hung around her face. Her bright blue eyes were lined and shadowed. She had high cheekbones and her lips were only slightly tinted.

"I'm not sure, but can I start with a drink?" I tried to smile, to smirk, something, but I just couldn't force it. I was just barely able to hold myself together.

"Sure thing. What's your poison?"

"Let me start with three Patrons please."

She smiled and set up the three shot glasses in front of me and filled them to the top. With shaking hands I downed all three of them in a matter of seconds.

"Rough night?" she laughed.

"You can say that. Can I get a 7 and 7 and two more Patrons?"

She raised her eyebrows at me, but filled my request.

The bar was fairly empty so she stayed close by. I quickly downed the two additional shots and then began to nurse my 7 and 7. The tequila seeped into my blood and slithered its way through my system like a snake.

"This kind of drinking on a Tuesday night can only mean woman troubles," she smirked.

"Don't remind me," I groaned.

"You wanna talk about it?"

"Nope," I said popping the 'p".

"Wanna forget about it?"

"Yep," I popped the 'p' again.

"Let me know if I can help you with that. I'm Cammy, " she licked her lips and set another shot down in front of me.

I don't know how long I sat there. My world was growing fuzzier by the minute and I welcomed the numbness. It felt so much better than the pain.

XXXXXX

The next morning I woke up with a raging headache. I groaned and rolled over. Maybe it had all been a fucking nightmare. I opened my eyes slowly.

_Where the fuck am I?_

I was lying in a warm, soft bed on blood red sheets. I sat up quickly and surveyed my surroundings. I definitely was not at home. I was in a decent sized bedroom with black walls. The bed was a queen sized and was made of dark wood and there was a matching dresser across the room. There were two doors, one, I'm assuming was the exit and the other, I was hoping, was a bathroom, because I really had to piss. It wasn't until I stood up that I realized that I was completely fucking naked. I looked over beside me and saw pale skin.

_Oh Fuck!_

Black hair was sprawled across the pillow. The girl from the bar. Not only had it not been a nightmare, but I had done something really fucking stupid….again. I bolted to the bathroom. I had to get out of there. This wasn't even fucking funny. After I did my business I opened up the door slowly. She appeared to still be asleep. I crept around the room and found my boxers and jeans. I was just getting ready to put my t-shirt on when I heard her.

"Going so soon?"

"Uh, yeah, I gotta get home."

"Oh come on, baby, come back to bed and let me take care of you."

She wasn't nearly as hot this morning as she had been last night. Of course, I couldn't remember anything past...well, I couldn't remember much at all. I remember drinking, heavily. Seven shots and at least two drinks.

_How the hell did I even get here?_

"No, thanks, I…I really need to go."

"Really?" She threw the covers down the bed and began crawling towards me, naked.

"Jesus Christ, woman. I don't even remember your name."

"That's funny. You grunted it several times last night as you were cumming," she smiled in what I assume was supposed to be a seductive way, but it ended up being a little creepy. I shuddered at the thought that I actually had sex with this woman. She could have any manner of diseases. And then the thought hit me.

"Please tell me we used a condom," I begged.

How could I have been so fucking brainless? Bella tells me that I knocked her up and what do I do? I get so fucking drunk I black out and shag the first pair of tits I see.

She scoffed. "Of course we did. Several, in fact. I'm not a fucking idiot. I don't know where you've been."

I sighed in relief and shook my head. I was going to have to take her word for it. I glanced around and saw a few condom wrappers on the floor. Satisfied, I finished pulling my shirt on.

"Come on, baby, why don't you come back over here and let me suck that gorgeous cock again?" she asked aggressively.

How I managed to get it up in the first place last night was beyond me, this chick was beginning to scare me and I was pretty sure that I drank enough to completely incapacitate me. Apparently not.

"Look, Christy, uh, Cassie."

"Cammy!" she snarled.

"Uh, yeah, Cammy. I don't remember what happened last night and truthfully, I don't really want to. This was a big fucking mistake. I'm sorry, but I really have to go home."

I felt around in my pockets and managed to find my keys, wallet and cell phone. I heard her scream something about a 'stupid punk ass motherfucker' as I left her apartment. I had no idea where I was so I flipped open my cell to call a cab. 22 missed calls, 37 missed text messages.

_Shit. How am I going to explain this?_

I called the taxi cab company and told them the cross streets that I was at before checking a few of my text messages.

**Alice: Edward, you asshole.**

**Emmett: Yo Fucker. Get your ass back here.**

**Alice: How can you possibly think she's lying? Did you even look at him?**

**Alice: OMG Edward, pick up your fucking phone!**

**Emmett: I'm gonna kick your ass if you don't get it back here ASAP.**

**Carlisle: Son, please come home.**

**Alice: I can't believe I convinced her to tell you. I should have known you'd go and ****fuck this up.**

**Emmett: ASAP was 10 minutes ago bro.**

**Mom: Please baby, don't do this. Come home and we can talk about it.**

I couldn't read anymore. I snapped my phone shut and shoved it into my pocket. Luckily the cab showed up a few minutes later and took me back to the bar so that I could pick up my car.

I didn't want to go back home. It was already eight and by the time I got back to the house I knew everyone would be up. They'd all know that I didn't come home last night and with my history, they'd all know what I'd done. I groaned and slammed my head against the steering wheel.

I knew that I needed to figure all this shit out, but instead I shoved it all to the back of my mind as I drove. This was not the time to try and process what she had told me.

I pulled into the driveway and I wasn't even out of the car before the front door opened. Alice was outside and coming right for me.

"Where the fuck have you been?" Alice screeched as her little fists began to pummel my chest. That shit hurt too. " I can't believe you fucking ran out on her again."

I noticed that Emmett was approaching us and before I could say a word I felt his fist connect with my jaw nearly knocking me to the ground.

"Ow! Fuck, Emmett."

"You deserve more than that you fucking coward," he bellowed.

"How the fuck was I supposed to react to that shit?" I screamed.

"You could have listened to her," Alice cried. " You know that baby is yours. I knew that baby was yours the moment I laid eyes on him. Everybody in this whole fucking town knows that baby is yours."

"Well maybe she should have kept her big fucking trap shut then."

"Edward," Alice growled. " Up until I caught her with Charlie, she had told a total of two people who his father was. No, scratch that, she told Jake. That was it. All the chief had to do was look at him."

I couldn't do this anymore. I was too tired. All I wanted to do was go to bed and pretend that last night had never happened. I went to go inside, but Emmett stepped out in front of me.

"Get out of my fucking way, Emmett."

"Dude, you have to deal with this."

"Right now, all I have to do is go back to sleep. I've got a big fucking hangover and thanks to you, a sore jaw."

I pushed passed him and into the house heading straight for my room. I did not look at anyone. I did not pass GO. I did not collect $200. I heard their grumbling, but I didn't give a shit. I stripped myself down and jumped into the shower to wash off the alcohol and whatever remnants were left of my hook-up. When I was done, I threw on a clean pair of boxer briefs and climbed under the covers. It didn't take me long to fall asleep. I was exhausted, but my sleep was anything but peaceful.

I awoke again with a start, this time in my own bed. Stretching my aching limbs out, I looked at the clock and saw that it was almost four o'clock in the afternoon. I had been plagued with nightmares all night long, or all day long actually. In them, every woman that I had ever slept with had found me and presented me with the child that I had fathered. I knew that I hadn't been that stupid. I always took precautions, always.

_So how the hell did Bella end up pregnant?_

I sat up trying to remember back to that night. We were really fucking drunk and I was high as a kite on top of that. I couldn't remember either way, but Jesus Christ, I had a lot of drunken escapades. I never forgot to wrap myself up. Did the condom break?

_Wait. Am I actually admitting that the kid is mine?_

Somewhere deep down the logical part of my brain was screaming the truth at me, but I refused to listen. I wasn't ready.

"Arrrgggg. Fuuuuuuuuuck!" I yelled out. I wrapped my hands around my head and clasped them together, shoving my elbows forward and leaning my head back. I didn't want to believe that Bella's kid was mine. In four years, it had never even crossed my mind. In all the memories of Bella that I took with me to college, not once did I imagine that I had left such a big fuck up behind me. I remember Alice complaining about not being able to get a hold of Bella throughout our entire freshman year. I only remember that because every time she would mention Bella's name I would get this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. I remember being nervous when my sister would attempt to call her friend, hoping that she would finally find out how school was going for her. If she had found that boyfriend that Alice kept telling me would 'finally relieve Bella of her V card'. And then I would ignore the jealousy and possessiveness that tried to creep in when I thought of Bella with someone else. I held her V card. I would always hold her V card. She was mine!

And I remember when Tanya, being her ever-bitchy self, made Alice cry by telling her that maybe Bella just wanted to move on from silly high school friendships. That it was obvious that their friendship wasn't as strong as Alice had thought and maybe she ought to just leave Bella alone and let her get on with her life. I should have just tossed her ass to the curb after that, but after Alice had run out of the apartment crying Tanya sank down to her knees and gave me a spectacular blow job.

XXXXXXX

I was finally able to drag my ass out of bed and down the stairs after throwing on a pair of old worn jeans only to find my mother sitting in her usual spot at the kitchen table, drinking a cup of coffee and looking through some papers.

"There's coffee," she said without looking up at me. I shuffled my feet along the hardwoods to the coffee pot, poured myself a cup and leaned up against the counter to take my first sip. I watched my mother as she continued to work.

"Why aren't you at the office?" I asked. I knew my mom was busy getting her design firm re-established so it didn't make sense for her to be sitting here at home.

"I sent Alice in today. I decided to work from home."

"Any particular reason?" I knew my mom and I knew that she had spent all day waiting for me.

She sighed and finally looked up.

"Come sit with me, Edward," she said solemnly.

I dropped my head. I knew that I wouldn't be able to argue with her and I wouldn't be able to scream and yell at her. She was my mother. I sat down across from her and took a long slow mouthful of my coffee. She didn't say anything at first. She just studied me as I fidgeted.

"Where did you go last night?" she finally spoke.

"A bar," I answered flatly.

"You stayed the night in a bar?"

"No."

She raised her eyebrows at me.

"You don't want to know, mom," I mumbled.

She took in a deep breath. "Back to this again, huh? Taking out your anger and fear and frustration by jumping into bed with the first willing girl?"

"It wasn't like that, mom. I didn't even know what I was doing."

"Yes you did," she snapped. "You've always known what you were doing. Don't try to pull that shit on me. You knew the second you walked in that bar what you were looking for."

I didn't respond. I guess it shouldn't have surprised me that my mom was well aware of my indiscretions. She was intuitive like that. She could read me better than anyone. She probably knew me better than I knew myself.

"Well, did it make you feel better?"

"No."

"Did you expect it to?"

"I told you I wasn't really thinking about it. I got drunk. I can't even remember leaving the bar."

"Do you know how dangerous that was Edward? Were you at least careful?" she scolded.

"Yes."

I wasn't about to tell my mother that it had been the girl who had taken care of that. I could already hear the disappointment in her voice.

"So this is what everyone has been so nervous about?" I questioned.

She nodded.

"When did you find out?"

"About two weeks ago."

"What about Alice?"

"A few days before that. When she and Jasper came out for the job interviews Alice set back up in this house. She went to the grocery store and ran into Bella. She said that Bella was nervous and evasive. A few minutes later she found out why."

"Charlie."

"Yes, Charlie. Jacob was holding him, but it didn't take Alice very long to see."

"How do we know mom? I mean, maybe Bella hooked up with someone at school that looked like me."

My mom just stared at me with a look of disbelief. " Are you kidding me Edward? I know that I did not raise you to be so dense. First of all, it's not possible. The timing; it takes nine months to grow a baby and he was born in April. Bella was pregnant before she left Forks. Secondly, that child has never even seen you before and he has so many of your mannerisms it's frightening."

I pinched the bridge of my nose. I could feel my chest tightening again and it was really fucking uncomfortable.

"Why didn't you tell me? I've been here for almost a week. Don't you think that's something I deserved to know?"

"We were trying to give Bella time. She wanted to tell you herself Edward, but she was scared."

"Scared of what?"

"Scared that you would react the way that you did."

I groaned. "What the hell mom? What am I supposed to do?"

Her eyes softened a little. " Talk to Bella."

"Right now, I don't want to talk to her. All I want to do is yell at her."

"What exactly do you want to yell at her about?"

I didn't think before I answered. If I had, I probably would have realized how stupid I was being.

"How could she do this to me? I mean, I'm not ready to be a dad."  
"Are you even listening to yourself? If I'm correct, and I believe that I am, it takes two people to make a baby. It took both of you being completely stupid and reckless. But do you honestly think that Bella was ready to be a mother at nineteen. You're twenty-three years old, Edward. You've had years of going out and playing the field. You got to stay out all night and sleep in the next morning. Meanwhile, Bella was ostracized and ignored. Instead of going out on dates she was waking up at three in the morning to nurse a screaming baby. She worked her way through college as a single mother and actually graduated on time. She's been an amazing mother despite the situation and that little boy is well-adjusted, happy, and completely perfect."

"She didn't have to keep it," I grumbled, once again not thinking about the words before they left my mouth. I really needed a fucking filter.

My mother stood up abruptly, her chair flying backwards. When I looked up at her I saw pure fury directed right at me. My mother had never looked at me like that and I recoiled a little at her intensity.

"Edward Anthony Cullen. The only thing holding me back from smacking the shit out of you right now is the fact that you're probably still in shock. But if I _ever_ hear you say anything like that again, believe me, I won't hold back. I am trying to be understanding about the position that you are in, because you are my son and I love you, but that child is a blessing. He's my grandchild and he's your son. You need to suck it up and find a way of coming to terms with that."

And with that, she grabbed her papers and stormed out of the kitchen, leaving me to face the facts of my colossal fuck-up all by myself.

XXXXXX

**AN: Well? What did you think? Was it what you expected? I did my best to portray the emotions that I would have had (if I had been him), but putting that stuff in writing is hard. I know some of you were hoping for a more peaceful reaction, but that just wouldn't be true to my Edward's personality. And I know that moving from the discussion of that night to finding out about Charlie was emotional whiplash, but that's the way it had to be. Edward is a good guy, but he's volatile and unpredictable and emotionally stunted. And like I've said before, Bella is just in defensive mode. She doesn't quite know how she's supposed to feel from one moment to the next.**

**Don't be too hard on Edward, he did what he did because, as Esme said, that's how he's always handled stress. See, she wasn't completely clueless, but at some point you have to let your children make their own mistakes. The fact is that he's freaking out, as he probably should be.**


	9. Moving Forward

**AN: ****Ho-ly shit! There are quite a few of you seriously pissed off at Edward. I can't say I'm surprised. Please, trust me though. It does get worse before it gets better, but it will all be worth it. Stick with me here.**

**Can I just say that I am completely fucking blown away. I don't bring out the swears very often when it's not part of a story, but the reviews that I got definitely deserve it. I can not thank you all enough. 121 reviews for chapter 8 alone this week and dozens more for previous chapters. Amazing. Thank you all for your support. **

**Thank you to Lexie2516 who set me up with a thread on Twilighted. **

**It is www(dot)twilighted(dot)net/forum/viewtopic(dot)php?f=44&t=12344. You know the drill on the "dot"s. If you've got questions, ask them and I will do my best to answer. **

**Also thank you to Twimom76 for all your support and advice. I think I'd be lost without you ;-)**

**Because I re-organized my chapters to make sure I got the reveal out last week I have a little bit of left over EPOV before we get to the aftermath in BPOV. I know you all probably don't want to hear from him right now, but there is a little bit of interesting info to be discovered so it's worth the read.**

**Okay, well this has been a really freaking long week. Are you ready? Here we go: **

Chapter 8: Moving Forward

EPOV

Over the next few days I tried really hard not to think about Bella and the baby, or the kid, whatever. It didn't work, but I did try. I didn't contact her either. It's not that I didn't want to, but I was still completely freaked and I wasn't ready to face her. A large part of me was still in denial. My siblings pretty much ignored me other than the occasional "asshole" thrown my way. I had the reminder of Emmett's feelings on my jaw. It still fucking hurt. I know I reacted badly, but shouldn't I be the one pissed off at them. They fucking lied to me.

I could tell that my parents wanted me to talk about it. I caught my mother staring at me sadly more than once. Carlisle had approached me multiple times only to open his mouth, close it, pat me on the shoulder and move away again. I really wasn't sure what they had expected for me to do. How they wanted me to behave. Did they think I would find out and be happy and excited that I had a kid that I hadn't even known about?

The days were easy. No one was home and I could wander about the house and grounds. I steered clear of town merely so I could avoid the possibility of running into Bella, or Chief Swan I did not want to run into the Chief at all. That man had a loaded gun on him ninety-nine percent of the time and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't hesitate to use it on me. When everyone else was home I stayed in my bedroom as much as possible, but after nearly a week I was starting to go stir crazy. And I really needed to start figuring out what I was going to do about school. I still didn't know which one I would go to, but I figured I would apply to several and decide later. In the meantime, I either needed to get a fucking job or start looking for volunteer work. I knew that there was a free clinic in Port Angeles and I figured I would start there. If all else failed, I knew my father would get me a position at the hospital. It's not exactly what I wanted, but if I had to go there, I would.

Monday morning I strolled into the Port Angeles free clinic. I dressed in casual navy slacks and a light blue shirt, no tie. I had attempted some sort of control over my hair, but failed miserably. I did manage, however, to cultivate a neatly trimmed beard to cover the now yellowish bruise on my face.

"Oh. My. God!" I heard a shrill voice cry. I looked up and saw none other than Jessica Stanley sitting at the front desk.

"Edward!" She jumped up and ran around to the waiting area. She threw herself into my arms and squeezed. I reluctantly gave her a semi-hug, patting her gently on the back.

"Uh, Hi, Jessica."

She looked up at me and leaned back, keeping her arms wrapped around my waist.

"My mom said that she saw your mom and sister in the grocery store," she smiled.

I tried to extract myself from her, but she just held me tighter.

"Yeah," I responded uncomfortably. She didn't seem to notice my discomfort however.

She grinned at me and licked her lips. "So, are you going to be around for long?"

I had a bad feeling about this.

"Well, I'll probably be around until I start medical school.."

"You're going to be a doctor?" she screeched. "I always knew you'd be something hot like that."

I looked around at the few people sitting in the waiting room. They were all looking at us. One or two looked amused, the others just looked annoyed.

"Yeah, look I was hoping to talk to Dr. Oleander about volunteering."

Her eyes widened.

"You want to work here? With me?"

_Is this girl fucking delusional? _

"I need to get in some volunteer hours. I've got a few options, but I thought I'd try here first. You know, looks good on the applications."

"Well, Jeff, uh, Dr. Oleander," she blushed, "is with a patient right now, but you can come back with me and wait."

Jessica winked and ran her tongue over her top teeth.

_Oh Lord. Maybe I need to re-think this plan._

"I guess," I mumbled. She let go of my waist, but grabbed my hand and led me into the office area. I wanted to yank it back, but I resisted and let her guide me. I took a moment to look over my former conquest, or "harpy" as Bella had called her. I smiled for the briefest of seconds before I winced and shook my head, trying to get her out. I wasn't ready.

Jessica looked pretty much the same. She had put on a few pounds, but she still looked pretty good. She was wearing a knee length black skirt and a striped button down top that her boobs nearly popped out of.

"So, how are things going?" Jessica asked as she sat down in her chair. She motioned for me to sit in the chair next to her as she crossed her legs.

"Fine."

"How was school? I would have loved to go to college on the East coast, but whatever. I ended up going to the community college here in Port Angeles. I thought that maybe I should go to UW, but honestly I didn't really know what I wanted to do so there was no point in wasting money." Jessica babbled on and on. Occasionally she would check a new patient in, but she never stopped talking. A few nurses eyed me curiously as they took patients back into the little rooms, but no one said anything.

"So what made you come back?" Jessica asked suddenly. I was a little taken aback, because after twenty minutes of talking solidly about herself she was actually asking _me_ a question. I glanced up at her. She looked a little nervous and started chewing on the end of her pen.

"My family. And school. I'm checking out U Dub."

I wondered if Jessica knew anything about Bella and Charlie. She wasn't living in Forks anymore, but her mother was and Mrs. Stanley knew everybody's business.

"Oh. So have you seen anyone from high school?"

_Yup, she knows. _

"What, you mean like Bella?" I asked a little bitterly. Okay, maybe a lot bitterly.

She bit down hard on the cap of her pen and then pulled it out of her mouth.

"Uh, yeah, Bella, or anyone." She was trying to hide her nosiness, but I wasn't fooled.

"Cut the shit, Jess, just ask me what you want to ask me," I growled.

"Sorry," she whispered. "I just didn't know, you know, about the baby and all. I mean my mom said he was yours and he kind of looks like you, okay, he _really_ looks like you, but Bella wouldn't tell anyone about who his father was. She just kind of showed up one day the summer after freshman year with this baby. Of Course, then he didn't really look like anyone, just like a baby. We just figured she got herself knocked up at college, but then the next year she came back and oh, my God, Edward, it was so obvious." She stopped and took in a deep breath. "I didn't even know….I mean, I knew that she and your sister were best friends, but I never saw her with you. Were you guys like, in a relationship?"

"No!" I snapped. "I didn't even know that she had a baby until last week."

"Oh my God, Really?" she gasped. "I thought for sure Tanya would have ripped you a new one. She seriously flipped her lid when she saw him the first time."

_What?_

I'm sure that if it were possible for my eyes to pop out of my head, they would have.

"Tanya saw him? When?"

"I don't know, summer after sophomore year? She came home and said that you guys were getting married. She had a ring and everything. Was telling everyone all over town how happy you guys were. Then she saw Bella and her kid at the diner and let me tell you Edward, she almost had a coronary. She didn't even tell you?"

My jaw dropped. That was the summer I caught her poking holes in my condoms. Right after…her trip back home. We had been on the verge of breaking up for most of that school year, but every time I tried she would do something to stop me. Most of the time she would distract me by taking off her clothes or my clothes. Other times she had other excuses like her grandmother died, she was failing out of school, she had gotten groped by some fraternity boys at the local bar.

"I never asked her to marry me."

Of all the things that were running through my head, that was the only thing that made it to my mouth.

_Stupid. _

"Oh well, she came back a few months later saying that she had ended it with you and had decided to come back home because she couldn't handle your infidelity." Jessica smiled sheepishly. " I guess she never knew about us."

I didn't have time to react verbally. Just then, a man dressed in a white lab coat stepped in to the office. He was on the shorter side, maybe forty-five with light brown hair with some grey in it. He had a couple of days worth of growth on his chin and he looked exhausted.

"Edward?" he asked as he eyeballed Jessica and me.

"That's me." I stood up and reached for his hand.

"I'm Doctor Oleander, Jeffrey. I only have a few minutes, but your dad gave me a call so let's go talk in the conference room."

I followed him, without looking back at Jessica. He led me to a relatively small room with a table that filled most of it. There were about 10 chairs that surrounded it and there was a desk with a sink and a coffee pot.  
Dr. Oleander grabbed himself a mug and poured some coffee, adding two sugars and one of those little creamer capsules.

"Can I get you anything?" he asked as he turned around.

"No thank you."

"So, I hear you're interested in doing some volunteering."

I needed to get my head straight for this. There was too much. I was getting a really bad headache.

"Well, I just graduated in May and wanted to apply to some medical schools. I thought that taking a year off to really get out there into the medical field would be a good idea," I told him confidently.

"Of course. Have you taken your MCAT?"

"Yes, I took them in the Spring. I scored a 40."

"Wow, that's impressive. You pretty much have any option that you want don't you?"

"I hope so."

"Where are you thinking of going?"

"I'm looking at Johns Hopkins, Harvard, Columbia, Duke, and UW."

"Those are all fantastic schools. From what your father has told me about you, I'm sure you'll do well."

"Thank you sir."

"You know, the University of Washington is one of the top ranked schools in both family and internal medicine. What field are looking into to?"

"I don't know. I think internal medicine, but I've heard that a lot of people go into med school with a fixed idea of what they want their focus to be and then end up changing, so I guess I'll just go in with an open mind."

"That's a fantastic idea, Edward." He glanced down at his watch and sighed. "Break's over, I should get back, but I think we can offer you something here that will help you on your way. When are you looking to start?"

"I think I can start right away, but I do have some…..things I need to handle first."

"Yes, well, why don't you do what you need to do. Is next Monday too early to start?"

"No, that should be fine," I nodded enthusiastically.

"Fabulous my boy. It will be nice to have another extra hand around here," he said slapping me on the back as we exited the room.

As I was walking back towards the waiting room Jessica jumped up from her chair and grabbed my arm, pulling me to her. She lifted onto her toes and whispered into my ear.

"It was great to see you again Edward. Just give me a call if you want to get together sometime." She slipped a piece of paper into the pocket of my jeans, slightly grazing my dick. It twitched slightly from being touched, but stayed flaccid. If she had done that in high school I probably would have hardened immediately, but I was pretty sure the last week had pretty much taken it all out of me. Even my morning wood had been seriously affected.

"I'll let you know, Jess."

I had no intention of calling her. I headed back to Forks. Emmett was right, I needed to deal with all of the shit that was hitting the fan. I was fucking pissed about what Jess had said about Tanya. That bitch knew that Bella had had my baby and not only did she not tell me, she fucking tried to get me to knock _her_ up. And Bella, why the fuck hadn't she told me? The more I thought about it, the more upset I got. Regardless of whether or not I wanted to be a father, I deserved to fucking know. I should have had a say in it. She had no right to do that to me. It was time to face her, to let her know exactly what I thought about the situation.

BPOV

He left. He just left. I was sitting on my ass on the patio and he just fucking left. I wasn't sure what I was actually expecting, but that wasn't it. I knew he would be upset. I knew he would probably yell, but the fact that he had completely denied it, that one threw me for a loop. How many days had I stared at my son, completely and utterly amazed at how much he looked like Edward? And he called me a whore! He really accused me of being a money-grabbing whore.

_Holy Fuck!_

"Bella, are you okay?" Alice asked as she rushed over to me. Jasper was right behind her. He reached down, grabbing my arms and helping me up.

"I….I'm fine."

In reality, I wasn't fine. I was anything but fine. This was a fucking mess. But I couldn't lose my shit, not here, not now.

"I think I should probably take Charlie home."

"Bella, I'm sure he didn't mean it. He's just freaked," Alice said, trying to defend her brother.

"Bullshit!" Emmett yelled. " That little fucker is going to do what he always does. He's going to run away and pretend it's everybody else's fault."

Jasper led me back inside, his arm around my waist. When we reached the door Carlisle put his own arm around my shoulders.

"It's all right, sweetheart. Don't worry about it right now. The hardest part is done. He just needs time."

I shook my head. "At this point Carlisle, I don't really care," I said, completely defeated. "He knows now, he can do whatever he wants to with it. I didn't need him before, and I don't need him now." I pulled away from both Carlisle and Jasper and started to head towards the basement when Carlisle gently grabbed my wrist.

"What about Charlie, Bella?"

I looked up at him in confusion. "What about him?"

"Don't you think he deserves to have his father in his life?"

I shook my head. "Not if he doesn't want to be there, no. Charlie has done just fine up until this point. He's already got great male role models and I'm sure that one day I will get married and he will have a more permanent father figure in his life. Edward doesn't owe me anything. He can do what he needs to do. He can go to medical school wherever he wants, get married, have kids."

"So that's it? Your just going to move on like you did before?"

"What?" I didn't understand what he was getting at.

"Bella, we've all fallen in love with him. He's part of us, our family. You are too." His voice was shaky and I could see slight panic in his eyes.  
Understanding shot through me like a bullet. He was afraid that I was going to cut them off.

"Jesus, Carlisle, I'm not going to take him away from you, any of you."

I could hear him let out a huge sigh of relief.

"All I'm saying is that my responsibility to Edward is done. I've told him. He knows. He can make his choice. It doesn't affect me and it won't affect Charlie. Look at you. You're not their biological father. You still love them right?"

Carlisle looked thoughtful for a moment and then nodded. " More than anything."

"Kids don't always need their biological parents to feel worthwhile Carlisle. My mom basically abandoned me after twelve years, but my dad loved me and took care of me and he is all I've ever really needed in a parent. Charlie doesn't even know Edward. "

I was hitting his soft spot, I knew that, but I needed him to understand where I was coming from.

"Look, I just need to go home. It's late, way past Charlie's bed time." I turned and made my way downstairs. Esme was sitting on the sofa with a sleeping Charlie in her lap. She was running her hands through his hair and humming. She looked up at me and smiled.

"I used to do this with the kids when they were little."

Looking at my small child, so angelic in Esme's arms, a painful thought assaulted me. I closed my eyes tightly and felt my mouth turn into a grimace.

"Esme, please tell me he did not hear any of that."

She shook her head. Her gaze was sympathetic as she looked back down at him. "The basement's soundproofed. Neither of us heard anything."

My sight became watery as I realized what could have happened had I not gotten Edward out of that room fast enough. "I...I wasn't thinking. Oh Esme, how could I have done that?" I cried. "Did he ask? Did he say anything?"

"No Bella. I don't think he even really noticed. And I distracted him with a game pretty quickly."

"I am a terrible mother," I whimpered.

Esme smiled softly at me. "No you're not, Bella. I thought it would be easier if he actually saw him too." Esme paused. "So I guess it didn't go so well?"

I laughed humorlessly. "That's an understatement. I don't think he's going to accept this."

I bent down in front of the sofa and lifted Charlie into my arms, huffing as he hung limply over my shoulder. Esme stood up and began to follow me back upstairs. Before we started climbing, her soft hand rested on my forearm.

"He'll come around, Bella. He's a good man."

I looked into Esme's green eyes. I couldn't bear to argue with her. Was Edward a good man? I didn't know. I didn't know him. I never really had. He was so unpredictable. One minute he was sweet, kind, gentle, begging me for forgiveness and the next he was raging at me with a fury I had never seen before. And I didn't miss the look of utter devastation that was hidden just beneath the surface. Yes, he was pissed, but he was hurt too. I had caused that, all of it.

I just nodded at Esme and proceeded up and out the front door, slipping my shoes on and grabbing my purse and keys on the way. I needed to get out of that house.

When I got home, my dad was asleep on the sofa. I knew that he wanted to know how things went, but I just couldn't wake him. I needed time to process it myself. After placing Charlie in our bed I lazily dressed in sleep shorts and a tank top and sat down at the tiny little desk in the corner of my room. I thought about Edward. I thought about the years that I longed for him to take notice of me and then the night that he finally did. I felt my whole body flush. The heat enveloped me causing a couple beads of sweat to form along the nape of my neck. It was fear, pain, embarrassment, and a teeny tiny bit of lust all wrapped up together. I thought of the day I found out I was pregnant and the look on my father's face when I told him. I thought about the day Charlie was born, the happiest day of my life, but I couldn't forget the sadness and lonliness that accompanied it. I thought of Charlie growing. God, he was only three, but it felt like the years had flown by so fast. And then I thought of Edward again. I had thought about him a lot over the years, it really couldn't be helped, but now he was here. He knew my secret and he hated me for it. I had been fooling myself into believing that I hadn't imagined what life could have been like. Would he have been there for me if I had told him in the beginning? Would he have taken care of me through my pregnancy? Held my hand during the birth? Sometimes I thought that maybe he would have been supportive, but if I let myself think about that too long, then my justification for keeping it from him would be null and void. I needed my justification. It protected me from the guilt. It protected me from the regret. Would we have lived together as a family? Could we have fallen in love?

_Not likely_

That's why it's called a fantasy, because that's not who Edward was back then. That's not who he was now. I did what was best for my son right? I could feel my emotions warring with each other and it was making my heart ache. I felt confident and stubborn about the decisions I had made with the occasional brief moment of doubt. I wanted to be angry, I _was _angry, but at the same time I could feel the tears building and burning in my eyes. All of the sudden, I let out a choking sob. The tears overflowed and poured down my cheeks. Edward didn't want any of this. He wouldn't forgive me and accept Charlie. He was going to leave again. Only this time he would know what he was leaving behind. Another sob escaped my throat. I looked over at Charlie who was shifting around, disturbed from sleep by the noises that I was making.

I couldn't just let go like I wanted to, like I needed to. There was nowhere to go. I didn't want to risk waking my son, but if I went downstairs I would wake up my dad. I just wanted one moment of solitude. One second to completely lose it and let myself cry.

Charlie and I needed our own space. My dad was taking care of us. He paid for the mortgage, the groceries, and everything else we needed. I had a little bit of money in savings, but I was going to need to get a job.

I had heard through one of my professors at school that there was a Psychologist in Port Angeles who was looking for research assistants. It wouldn't be the highest paying job, but it should be enough. It would also look good on my application should I go back to grad school.

I wiped away my remaining tears and decided that it was time to move forward. I had kind of been stuck in one place for the last couple of weeks dealing with the Cullens, but not anymore.

XXXXX

"Bella?"

I felt something on my arm. I rolled over trying to make it go away.

"Bella."

"Huh?"

"Come on Bells."

My father.

"Oh, Dad," I groaned. I rolled over and tried to open my eyes. The blurry form of my dad was hovering over me. I blinked a few times and rubbed my eyes trying to get the sleep out.

"What time is it?" I croaked.

"It's five."

"In the morning?"

He chuckled. "Yeah, Bells."

"Why on Earth would you wake me up this early?"

"I need to go to work."

"Okay." I tried to roll back over, but he stopped me.

"Bells?"

I stared at him with a 'what the fuck' look on my face.

He huffed "What happened?"

I sat straight up. "Oh, shit, Dad, I'm sorry."

Taking extra care not to wake Charlie as I climbed out of bed I pulled my robe from the hook on my door and followed my dad downstairs.

There was cup of steaming coffee already sitting on the kitchen table.

_I love my dad_

I sat down and took a long sip. Dad sat down across from me.

"Did you tell him?"

I closed my eyes and nodded. As much as I tried to hide them away, the tears were still there. Damnit.

"He didn't take it well did he?"

I shook my head.

I replayed the evening for my dad. Not word for word, because that would have been painful and unnecessary, but he got the gist.

When I was finished, my eyes burned and I had to choke back my emotion. My dad stood up abruptly.

"Dad?"

He didn't say anything to me. He went to the garage and then came back in—with his gun belt. I watched as he checked to make sure his service revolver was loaded. My dad never checked to see if his gun was loaded at least, not in front of me.

"Daddy?"

"You think he's home?"

"Dad, what are you doing?"

He looked at me for a second. "I'm gonna kill him."

My mouth hung open.

_I don't think he's kidding. _

"Are….are you joking?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

Um, no, he really didn't.

He shoved his gun back into the belt that was attached to his hip and started for his coat.

I jumped up.

"Daddy, you…you can't really kill him."

He looked at me incredulously "Yes, Bella, I can. And I can make it look like an accident too."

This was all wrong. He was too calm.

_Shit, he's seriously serious. Fuck, how do I stop him. Should I stop him? _

_YES! Edward may be an asshole, but he's the father of your child. _

"Daddy, please don't do this," I begged, tugging on his arm.

"I should have done it when I found out Bella. I should have hunted that little shit down, dragged him back here to show him what he'd done and then buried his body in the backyard. Today-today is the day."

"But, but, if you get caught." I was stumbling over my words.

"I won't." His jacket was on and he was shoving his feet into his boots. I had to make him stop right fucking now.

"Daddy," I grabbed his face, placing my palms on either side of his scruffy jaw, and made him look me in the eye. "You. Cannot. Kill. Edward."

"Please, for me, for Charlie, do not kill him."

"How can you defend him?"

"I'm not defending him, Dad, but…" I growled in frustration. The words just wouldn't come out. "You just can't."

My Dad's nostrils flared as he breathed in and out. This was good. I could see anger replacing the calm. Anger was good. Anger meant that he could get it out. Calm was bad. Calm meant that he was capable of anything. Including killing my son's father.

"Daddy?"

"Fine."

"Thank you," I breathed. "You promise?"

He didn't respond.

I raised my eyebrows. "Yes!" he acquiesced. "Fine. I promise. I won't kill him…..today."

I had to chuckle a little. My dad was a little overprotective. I kissed him on the cheek and sent him out the door.

"Remember, you promised," I warned as he opened the door to his cruiser.

"I remember. I promised not to _kill_ him."

"Daddy!"

But he wasn't listening anymore. He was in the car and backing out of the driveway.

Shit. I just hoped Edward was smart enough to lay low for a while.

XXXXXX

Later that morning I called Dr. Lucas Alexander, the Psychologist in Port Angeles. We agreed to meet for lunch to discuss what he was looking for and what I was looking for. The way he said it almost sounded like we were looking to see if we would be compatible in a relationship. I guess in a way, we were. Jake didn't have to be at work at the shop until three so he offered to take Charlie off my hands. When I walked into the little café in downtown Port Angeles, I was a little surprised, to say the least. Dr, Alexander, who insisted that I call him Luke, was thirty-six years old, extremely handsome with dark hair and blue eyes. He was warm and inviting. His work was right down my alley. He was looking into whether there was a significant difference in prevalence of mental illness in school-aged kids who were adopted, in foster care, being raised by a single parent, and those who were living in traditional two-parent households.

"I would love to work with you," I stated excitedly. I bit my lip and then added "if you'll have me."

"I would love to have you on board Bella. I think it will be a good fit for both of us. I also have another assistant. You'll probably meet her as we really get underway."

I debated on whether or not I should tell Luke about my situation. I had learned about self-disclosure in one of my classes and although I really wanted this job, I knew that I couldn't risk screwing up Luke's research with personal bias.

"Uh, Luke?" I started hesitantly.

"What's up, Bella?" he smiled.

"For the sake of full disclosure, I think I should tell you about me."

Luke furrowed his brow at me and then nodded for me to continue.

I took a deep breath. "I am a single mom. I have a three-year-old. He's obviously not in the age category that we'll be looking at so I don't know if it really matters, but I don't want…."

"It's fine Bella. Anyone that I would hire would probably fit into one of the categories in one way or another. It might be something we put in the limitations, but probably not. This is primarily a facts based study."

I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face.

"Thank you."

"Not a problem, Bella. I'd like you to start right away if possible. You've already learned about and done some basic research in your undergrad right?"

I nodded my head.

"I have some background research to do for the literature section. You can work on it from home. I'll pay you $13 an hour if you can work five hours a day Monday through Friday. I'm not really concerned when or where you do the research. I'll e-mail you a detailed outline of the study and then what I'm looking for. I'll also e-mail you some samples of previous studies so that you can get an idea of the formatting. It might be good if you got some books about psychological research. I have a few in my office. You're always welcome to borrow those as well. We'll meet twice a week as a team to go over our process and re-evaluate our schedule as needed."

"So should I just start tomorrow."

"Yeah, I'll send you the e-mails that contain some of the research articles as well as a outline. That should take you a couple of days. We'll meet next Tuesday at ten at Starbucks."

"Okay," I grinned.

We spent the next half hour chatting about our lives, nothing in depth, but basic 'getting to know you' shit. It was fun. It was nice to be back in the professional mentality. When I was in school I met new people all the time and we discussed all sorts of off the wall things. I felt like my mind was being stimulated and it helped me manage my life when I would go home. Since I returned to Forks I felt useless and dumb. My conversations always revolved around Charlie. Not that I didn't enjoy talking about my baby, but it was nice to have an intellectual conversation every now and then.

We finished up lunch and said our goodbyes. I got into my car and let out an extremely loud squeal.

_I have a job! I have a fucking job! I can get my own place and be a productive adult!_

It's not that I really wanted to leave my father's house. I loved living with Dad. But I really did just need my own space and there was no way that I would be able to get it unless I moved out. My dad always knew that we would eventually leave, we'd already been there for over two months. I hoped that this was not a surprise for him. It would still probably be a few weeks before I could actually find a place, but it was a start. I picked up Charlie from Jake, who wrapped me in a giant hug and twirled me around when I told him the good job news, and headed back to Forks to tell my dad.

Dad was actually really excited for me. He grinned widely when I told him that I'd actually be using my degree and that it would help me get into grad school if I decided that's what I wanted to do. He was resigned to the idea of us moving out, eventually.

"You've been an adult for a long time, Bella." I watched as he gave me a half smile. "I never expected you to stay forever. Just don't forget your old pops here okay." I knew he'd be sad when we left, but it's not like I'd be going far. At least, I didn't think I would.

"I won't, Daddy." I hugged him tightly. "You have us for at least a few more weeks though so don't start missing us yet."

XXXXXX

The next few days passed by quickly. I had received the e-mail that Luke had promised me and I spent half an hour printing them out before I took Charlie to Tillicum Park for our typical Thursday morning. The park was our time to play and I didn't want to spoil it by bringing my papers to read so I didn't actually get started until Charlie went down for a nap around one thirty. I spent two hours reading and highlighting some the finer details of the study and I even pulled out my copy of Research Design in Clinical Psychology that I had used in my senior year. The last three hours of work I did after Charlie went to bed. I e-mailed Luke to find out if I could possibly work during the weekends to make up for time if something happened during the week. He stated again that as long as I got my 25 hours a week in, it really didn't matter.

On Friday night, my dad, Charlie and I were going out to eat with the Carlisle and Esme and I was really excited to tell them. I knew that they would be happy for me.

My dad had informed me that he and Carlisle had had a discussion about Edward. He wouldn't tell me the specifics, only that Carlisle had also made him promise not to shoot Edward at first sight. He was pretty disappointed. Now it would make it more difficult to make it look like an accident.

We met up at a little Italian place that was nestled into the trees just outside of Forks. I was surprised to see that Alice and Jasper had also joined us. Luckily, Edward had not. I was hoping not to have a discussion about him and I figured that since Charlie was here that it wouldn't be a problem.

"Emmett and Rose are looking for a place to live over in Port Ludlow. Rose got offered a 3rd grade teaching position over there and Emmett was able to get a job with an architecture firm in Port Townsend," Alice chirped as we sipped our wine.

"That's awesome. So they're going to be close?"

"Uh huh!" she grinned. " So when they start making babies of their own, I'll have all my little nephews and/or nieces close by."

I looked over at Charlie who was blowing bubbles in his children's cup of milk.

"Charlie, stop that," I scolded.

He glanced up at me sheepishly and then went back to blowing bubbles again.

"Charlie," I warned. "Do it again, and I'm going to take the milk away."

"Okay, Mommy," his little voice piped.

"So, Bella," Carlisle said taking a sip of wine. "Your dad tells me that you have some news." I looked over at my dad who shrugged his shoulders and shook his head to let me know that he hadn't told them what the news was. Esme looked really nervous as she fiddled with her diamond tennis bracelet that hung delicately from her wrist. Alice and Jasper just stared at me with blank expressions. I didn't really know what kind of news they were expecting, but I had to laugh at their anticipatory faces.

"I got a job," I said as I chuckled.

Esme let out a huge sigh and everyone's faces relaxed.

"That's wonderful, dear, what are you going to be doing?" Esme asked as she reached for my hand. I grasped her slender fingers and was instantly comforted.

"I'll be working as a research assistant for a Clinical Pediatric Psychologist in Port Angeles."

"Wow, Bella, that will look wonderful on your CV," Carlisle beamed. "What kind of research will you be doing."

"Dr. Alexander is doing a study on how the make-up of a family impacts metal illness in school-aged children."

"Make-up?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, the structure, like whether or not they come from a single parent household, are in foster care, adopted, dual parent household etcetera," I explained.

"That's going to be a tough project," Carlisle noted. "Kids in foster care typically have more instances of behavioral and metal health issues in general. I think I know this guy, Luke Alexander?"

"That's him. And yes, I know it's going to be tough. I start tomorrow looking into the literature on the subject. I'm really excited about it."

The conversation flowed easily until our dinner was brought out. That's when I noticed Charlie blowing bubbles again. I snatched the cup away from him quickly.

"Mooooooomy!" he screamed as he reached for it.

"Charlie, I told you to stop blowing bubbles. I'll put it in a sippy cup and you can drink it from there."

"I don't wanna sippy," he cried.

"Too bad, baby, maybe next time you'll remember to do as your told."

I could see my dad and Carlisle trying to hide their laughter as I grabbed a Thomas the Tank Engine sippy cup from my oversized purse and poured the milk into it. I scowled at them, which just made them laugh harder. Esme smacked her hand against Carlisle's chest, but she too was trying really hard to suppress her amusement. Charlie whined and complained for ten minutes before he realized that I was ignoring him. Then he tucked into his buttered noodles. When he was done I grabbed a packet of baby wipes from my purse and had him clean his hands.

"Jesus, Bella, is there anything that you don't have in there?" Alice giggled. "Why don't you just carry a diaper bag?"

"I carried a diaper bag as a purse for two and a half years, Alice, he doesn't wear diapers anymore so therefore, I reserve my right to carry a purse again, no matter how freaking monstrous it is," I laughed. "And no, I pretty much have everything but the kitchen sink in this thing." I dropped my bag back onto the floor with a loud thud and the whole table started laughing.

We were drinking coffee and eating an _amazing _tiramisu when Esme asked me what I was going to do with Charlie while I was working.

"Well, for a while I can work from home or after he goes to sleep. As long as I get my hours in, it's not a big deal when I work. I'm going to start looking for an apartment soon and once I'm sure I can make the bills, I'm going to try and get Charlie into a daycare."

The entire table was quiet. I looked up and saw Esme and Alice staring at me. Carlisle's eyes were wide, his fork frozen halfway to his mouth and he silently watched his wife. Jasper bit his lip and hid behind his coffee while my dad and Charlie continued to scarf down their desserts, completely oblivious.

"Um, what?" I asked

"You're moving?" Esme asked timidly.

"Yeah eventually, but not far. I'm not going to actually be making that much so I'll have to see what I can afford, but I'm sure it won't be much farther than Port Angeles."

I really didn't see what the big deal was. They'd still be able to see Charlie.

"Daycare?" Alice squeaked.

"Yes, daycare," I nodded.

"We could help you," Esme smiled. "And on the days we can't, we can hire a nanny, or...maybe...Edward would be willing to..."

I choked on the piece of tiramisu I was currently trying to swallow. I had to take a large gulp of water to clear my throat, but that made the coughing worse.

After a minute or two, I had cleared my throat enough to speak.

"I don't have the money to hire a nanny, Esme. Besides, Charlie will be fine. I heard through the grapevine that Mrs. Crowley, Tyler's mom, runs a small group out of her house. She's a certified nurse and when she retired last year she decided to open up her own daycare." I chose to completely ignore her comment about Edward. He hadn't even tried to see me or Charlie since I told him and I don't think I would ever trust him to take care of Charlie on his own even if he wanted to.

"We can cover the cost Bella," Esme said quietly.

I was trying really hard not to get irritated. I knew that Esme wasn't trying to insult me, but to me it sounded like what I could provide for my son wasn't good enough.

"He's been in daycare since he was three months old. It would be great if you could watch him one or two days a week, but I'm not hiring a nanny."

"But…"

"No. I'm sorry, but it's out of the question," I snapped.

Charlie noticed the tone of my voice and raised his head to look at me. I knew I looked tense. I softened my face immediately and Charlie, satisfied that I was okay, went back to eating his ice cream.

No one said anything else about me working or the daycare situation. I think it must have been due to them not wanting to rock the boat. Despite my assurances that I would not take Charlie from them, Alice had let it slip that her parents were still worried. Especially since Edward was behaving like such an ass and refusing responsibility. I didn't really care. It was true what I told them that night. I didn't need Edward to help me raise Charlie. In fact, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it would actually be easier if he wasn't involved. All he could do is add complications to my life and to Charlie's life, we were happy the way things were. And the more I told myself that, the more I believed it.

Twenty minutes later we were splitting the bill and heading out. I lifted an exhausted Charlie from his booster seat. We said our pleasant goodbyes to the Cullens and I let my dad drive my car home. I pulled Charlie's clothes off gently, leaving him in only his underwear and an undershirt and put my pajamas on before climbing into bed myself. I wrapped my arm around my sleeping baby and snuggled into his back. Within minutes I was asleep.

XXXXX

On Saturday I let Alice and Jasper take Charlie shopping in Port Angeles. They said they needed him. I didn't really understand what they needed a 3 year old for, but I made them promise that he would not come home with a shitload of toys and clothes. Alice agreed, but then Jasper winked at me, which wasn't exactly reassuring. They were gone for four hours. Three of those, I worked and the last hour I literally did nothing. I sat on my ass and watched a craptastic pseudo-horror movie on the Sci-Fi channel. When Charlie bounded in, I knew something was up, but Alice zipped her lip at him and he imitated her. They didn't have any bags with them though so I decided not to gripe at them.

It wasn't until that night as I was putting Charlie to bed that he let it slip that Alice had bought him a swingset for Gramma Esme and Papa Carlisle's house. I thought about being upset, but it was actually a really good idea. I didn't really know how much time Charlie would be spending over there in the future, but Emmett and Rose were sure to have children and Alice and Jasper, if they every got their butts in gear. Edward and I would probably have more children. I mean, not together, but with other people. Of course, I wasn't their family and any other children I had may not actually be invited, but whatever, a swingset was still a really good idea.

On Sunday, Esme invited me over, but I was trying to avoid going over to the Cullen's house. Edward and I still hadn't spoken and I wasn't eager to accidentally run into him. I was going to have to figure something out though. I couldn't very well not visit them for an entire year waiting for Edward to go to medical school. It wasn't fair to them and it wasn't fair to Charlie, especially after the swingset was installed. Alice had called Charlie up to tell him that the truck would be there on Wednesday. He was so excited I thought he was going to explode. I was able to get a couple more hours of work done, essentially giving me a free day during the week if I needed it.

Monday was dreary and raining. Charlie and I spent the morning building a fort in the living room out of all of the blankets in the house. He helped me make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and we sat huddled in our little hideout eating them with goldfish crackers and drinking our juice boxes. I even let him take his nap in there. I was stroking his face as his eyes fluttered shut and I listened as his breathing evened out.

Making myself a cup of coffee, I sat down to start working. About 5 minutes later there was a knock at my door. I wasn't expecting anyone, but I assumed it was either Alice or Jake. I was wrong.

XXXXXXXX

**AN: I know that you guys wanted some Bella & Edward interaction or some Edward and little Charlie interaction in this chapter, but I couldn't fit it in. I tried, but it ended up being something like 12,000 words and this was an excellent place to cut it. **

**Are you excited about the return of Jessica? LOL. You know that it had to happen eventually. Just wait until you find out why she started working at the clinic!**

**And what about the info she had about Tanya knowing about little Charlie? Poor Edward. I know you guys don't like him very much right now, but now not only has Bella hid his son from him, but he finds out that his long-time girlfriend did too. He could have found out about Charlie two years ago! Oh, and the top score on the MCAT is a 45. It's divided up into four categories, and then all the scores add up to one. ****The average overall nationwide score is 28 so w**ith a 40, you can into pretty much anywhere you want. 

**So that was Bella's reaction to what happened when she told Edward. Good? Bad? And the Chief's reaction too. Of course that was my teaser last week. Don't worry, the Chief will have his day with Edward. **

**Next week: Edward and Bella have a little chat and Edward gets a reality check. **

**Please, please review: I will be completely depressed if my number drops back down to 50 reviews. See, first I use bribery, then I beg, now I'm using guilt. I'm a clever little cat aren't I. ;-)**

This weeks Rec:

**Surviving Bella by Savage7289:** I have really been enjoying this one recently. Edward is the captain of a sailing vessel called 'The Twilight'. He is an alcoholic, a womanizer, and he has a very violent past. When the ship is damaged in the middle of the night and rapidly begins sinking, Edward winds up in a life raft and ends up pulling a drowning Bella in with him. Not only do these two have to try and survive the elements, but Edward is now a raging alcoholic without any alcohol and they also discover that they are linked in a very painful way. Definitely a story to check out.


	10. Reality Check

**AN: ****Another week has gone by and we are ready for the next phase of this E & B debacle. You're hatred may only intensify after this, but I did warn you ;-P Then again, maybe not. We'll see.**

**Many people are questioning how Edward can be such an asshole to Bella when he obviously had feelings for her when they were younger. Trust me please. This is the deal, Edward is having a complete overload of emotions. He does not possess the ability to compartmentalize those feelings and so they are just one big jumble. Anger is a very dominant emotion. It is one of the easiest emotions to express b/c it's a surface emotion. It protects deeper emotions. This is the case for Edward. Cognitively, he knows that he is out of line, but it's just a lot easier to deal with anger than guilt, pain and regret. It's like the 5-stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. I'm not saying that he should be forgiven for his behavior, but I wanted you to understand why I have written him like this and to know that he is not beyond redemption despite how he may behave at this point.**

**Thank you to everyone who is reviewing. I love the passionate responses I am getting. Thank you to Melee who created me an absolutely gorgeous banner. It's on my profile page. **

**I hope all you who have been visiting the Twilighted thread or have requested to follow me on twitter (both links on my profile page) have enjoyed the extra teasers. It's been fun for me to figure out how much I can post w/o revealing too much.**

**Okay, so there is a discussion about Bella's body and her right to choose what she does with it. It is not my intention to make a political or moral statement in this story. This is how Bella feels and I will not say one way or another what my own belief system is b/c it does not play into or affect this story.**

**The characters belong to Stephenie Meyers.**

**Without further ado:**

Chapter 9: Reality Check

BPOV

I opened the door to find a very disgruntled Edward. His jaw was set tight and his eyes were hard. I lifted my eyebrows at him in surprise.

"Can I help you?"

"We need to talk," he growled.

"Um, we don't _need_ to do anything, Edward. If you want to talk to me, I suggest you ask. If not, then go away. I've got shit to do."

"What kind of shit do _you_ have to do? Aren't you just living off your father?"

I slammed the door in his face. How dare he! Arrogant rich son of a bitch had the nerve to tell me that I was living off my dad when he was doing the exact same thing. Bastard.

There was another knock on the door. I ignored it. Pounding. I continued to ignore. Finally he started pressing the doorbell. Over and over and over. I couldn't ignore this. It was sure to wake Charlie up and the last thing I needed was an over tired three-year-old whining all afternoon.

I threw open the door.

"What?"

"Okay, fine, will you Pleeeeaaase talk to me?" he asked sarcastically.

"No."

I went to slam the door again, but he caught it with his foot to stop me.

"Edward, I swear to God, if you don't move your foot, I'm going to go get one of my dad's guns and shoot it off," I snarled. "And stop ringing the Goddamn doorbell. I have a child who is trying to sleep."

"Bella, you're wrong. I don't really _want_ to talk to you either and I wish I didn't have to, but unfortunately we_ do_ need to talk." He shook his head and lowered his eyes. "And I didn't realize he'd be sleeping," he mumbled.

"So, you just figured you'd wander over here and have it out with me in front of him?"

"No...maybe...I don't know, Bella I didn't really think about it."

"Seems like a habit of yours."

He sighed loudly, presumably in irritation. "Well, regardless, we gotta do this shit sometime."

I didn't want to admit it, but he was right. He needed to know where I stood. And although I didn't want to admit it, I needed to know what he was thinking.

"Fine, but you're going to have to go around the back."

"Seriously, Bella, you're not even going to let me come in? It's kind of cold out here. And wet." He was shuffling his feet and rubbing his hands together.

I huffed. I wasn't about to let him in my house. . . or my father's house. Whatever.

"No, I'm not. First of all, Charlie and I were making a fort this morning and the house is a wreck. Second of all, he's sleeping in said fort and I won't have your screaming waking him up," I snapped. "So go around back and I will be out in a few minutes." I shut the door and locked it. I ran up the stairs and grabbed the baby monitor out of my room and set it down on the table next to where Charlie was sleeping. I hooked the other one into my belt loop and made my way to the patio door. When I opened it, Edward was pacing back and forth.

"Let me make one thing clear. If you get loud enough to make him even whimper inside, this conversation is over," I warned.

He didn't respond. He just stared at me with….I don't know if it was anger, frustration or just plain hatred, but I got the message he was trying to convey. He was not happy with me.

"I've got plenty of shit to say, but since you made the trip over here I suppose you should go first," I stated with a wave of my hand.

"I don't even know where to fucking start, Bella." He raked his hands through his hair and tugged. "I mean, what the fuck were you even thinking?"

"When? When you were fucking me, when I found out I was pregnant? When, Edward?"

"When you decided to make me a father without even discussing it with me? Didn't I have a right to any input?"

"And what, pray tell, would your input have been? Charlie is the love of my life and I don't regret a single second giving birth to him."

"You had no right."

"I had every right. It's my fucking body. I wasn't going to kill my baby because I made a fucking mistake."

"No, that's not what I meant. I meant you had no right to keep him from me. Why didn't you tell me?"

I chuckled darkly. "You made my first time having sex completely miserable. You left me bruised and bleeding. Why on earth would I trust you enough to tell you?"

"You can't put all that shit on me, Bella. It was just as much your fault. You didn't tell me you were a fucking virgin and I don't recall you asking me to stop. At any point in time you could have told me I was hurting you, but you didn't."

His voice was an octave higher than normal and I could tell he was struggling to keep himself under control.

"All you had to do was fucking look at me, Edward. I'm sure it was written all over my face. It hurt so bad that I couldn't breathe, much less talk, but you didn't even have the decency to look at me. And in all honesty, I don't even believe that it would have made a difference. I was covered in purple fingerprints from my shoulders to my thighs. That shit doesn't just happen."

He winced slightly, but turned away from me.

"I would have fucking stopped," he whispered so quietly I almost didn't hear him.

"I have been with other men and not one of them left a single mark like that, much less dozens of them. I know the difference between being rough and being violent, Edward. I don't know what I did to piss you off so much that night to make you want to hurt me, but I was fucking scared of you; of your reaction. When I found out I was pregnant, you were already gone and I was petrified."

He swallowed roughly as he closed his eyes. I couldn't pinpoint his expression. So many emotions seemed to be playing out at once.

"I didn't do it on purpose, Bella. I didn't want to hurt you. God, hurting you was the last thing that I wanted. I got upset, I just lost control. I've already told you that I was sorry countless times. There will never be a good excuse for what I did to you, but that's no reason to completely leave me out."

He spoke a little softer and I could see his mask slipping a little.

"I thought I was doing what was best. What would you have done if I had told you?"

"I don't know." He shrugged and met my gaze. His green eyes bore into mine. It was almost too painful so I looked away before I spoke again.

"I do. You would have come back. You would have tried to convince to me to end it. You would have resented me and Charlie for taking away your chance at a normal life. Just like you do now. You had a girlfriend, Edward. One you cared enough about to go to college with. You were hers, not mine."

Something flashed in his eyes, but was gone just as quickly.

"Tanya was a fucking bitch," he growled.

"Of course she was, but you were with her. I didn't know what your relationship was. I heard at one point that you were getting married. I wasn't about to show up with my kid and ruin that for you."

"That's a piss poor excuse, Bella. You can justify it all you want to, but what you did was fucking wrong."

"I'm not making excuses and I'm not trying to justify anything. I'm explaining my rationale. And for the record, what exactly have you done since I told you that proves I was wrong to hide it from you? You have done nothing but scream at me and insult me. You can't possibly imagine what it was like for me to discover that I was carrying _your_ child. To hear the whispers and the accusations every time I tried to come home. You stand there and judge me without knowing a single fucking thing."

He continued to glare at me.

"I want a DNA test," he blurted out. I watched as he closed his eyes tightly and shook his head with a grimace.

_Did he really just say that?_

My jaw tensed and I ground my back teeth until they ached from the pressure. Did he honestly think I was lying about this? He obviously hadn't gotten a good look at Charlie.

"Really?"

"And if he's not mine….."

"He _is_ yours," I interrupted.

"Bella!"

"I'm not going to sit here and say '_if he's not yours_', because he _is_ yours, Edward. I had sex one time, with you, before he was born and not again until he was almost a year old. Not to mention he's the spitting image of you. All you have to do is look at him. You want a paternity test, I'll give you your fucking paternity test, but there is not 'if' for me."

I took a deep breath before continuing.

"Look, I'm not any happier about this situation than you are. We've been just peachy for the last several years all by ourselves. But the fact is that you are his father and regardless of how I feel about that, you deserved to know."

"I deserved to know four years ago."

"Fine, I get it, but I can't go back now. I did what I did. I can't change that.

I wrapped my arms around my middle as if it would give me protection from all the tension and anger radiating off of him.

"I want to give you the opportunity to be a part of his life," I continued, "but if you decide that you don't want it, then I am asking you to terminate your parental rights."

"Excuse me?" he scoffed.

I swallowed dryly. "It means give him up permanently. I can't have you jumping in and out of his life as you see fit. I don't want him to see a parade of women making their way through your bed. And I don't want him to ever feel second best to any other children that you _choose_ to have with your future wife or girlfriend."

I knew I was hitting below the belt, but my fear got the better of me. If he gave up his rights now, he could never fight me for him in the future.

"What the fuck, Bella?" Edward's voice cracked.

"I'm doing what I have to do. I've already told the rest of your family that I wouldn't take him away, and I won't, but if you decide that you don't want him, then he won't be yours. He doesn't ever have to know that you're his father." I took another deep breath.

"You accused me of being after your money. I don't need shit from you. I never have and I never will. I'm a good mother all by myself. You won't ever have to pay a cent."

Yeah, I had practiced this speech a hundred times in the mirror and it came out just how I wanted it to. I wasn't about to let Edward Cullen see me crumble.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me!" he roared. " You….I…Oh MY GOD! I don't even know what to fucking say to that shit. You hide my kid from me for three years, surprise me with him out of the blue and are already asking me to just fucking leave? I know I was an asshole, Bella, but I didn't deserve _this_. Did you even consider what this was going to do to me? Who the fuck _are_ you? I've known you since you were twelve, Bella. Twelve! I never would have imagined that you could be such a manipulative little bitch."

Okay, that was it. Time for me to put a stop to his little tirade.

"Yeah, you've known me since I was twelve and yet you accuse me of lying about my son's paternity and question my motives. Fuck that, Edward. You never knew me." I turned towards the door, but stopped with my hand gripping the handle.

"Let me know when you've scheduled the paternity test and I'll take Charlie in. When you get the results, you have two weeks to make a decision and then I'm going to make it for you."

I turned around and went inside, locking the patio doors behind me and pulling the curtains closed. I heard something hit the window with a thump, but didn't look back. Almost exactly two minutes later, just as I had made it to my bedroom, I lost it.

I fell to my knees beside my bed and let out a painful, shuddering sob. I had known that this was going to be bad, that Edward would be upset. But I had no idea that he would be so cruel. I managed to make it up to my bed and curled up into a ball. I tried to pull it together, but every time I thought I was done a new wave of emotion would hit and I couldn't breathe. I hiccoughed violently, my nose was dripping mercilessly and tears poured from my eyes. I just wanted time to go back. I wanted to be free from all of this. Charlie and I were fine. We were living. There was no drama and no pain. We were happy, just the two of us, with my dad and Jake and Riley. I loved that the Cullen's, other than Edward, wanted to be a part of his life, but Christ I wished I had never run into Alice that day. And that feeling alone caused guilt to seep in and another round of sobs, snot and tears to take over.

About an hour later, my body was so exhausted that I had to stop. I continued to lay in bed, motionless. Where before my body and mind had been engorged with emotion, they were now void of any feeling at all. I felt numb. I heard Charlie stirring over the baby monitor and knew I had to pull myself together, but it was so Goddamn hard. I didn't want to move, I just wanted to go to sleep and wake up three weeks ago. But my son deserved his mother, not some withering mess. I reluctantly pulled myself from my position and walked across the hall to the bathroom. My muscles were sore and heavy. I looked in the mirror and saw what I can only describe as a horror movie victim…..or a villain. My eyes were bloodshot, completely red rimmed and puffy. My nose and upper lip were raw from the constant stream of snot and my cheeks were flushed and blotchy.

I took in a deep breath and turned the water on cold, splashing it on my face. I held a washcloth and wiped it down before putting on some soothing lotion and a little bit of makeup. I still didn't look fabulous, but it was enough to fool my three-year-old.

XXXXX

After the encounter with Edward at my house, I was determined more than ever to just stay out of his way. He texted me on Tuesday to let me know that he had scheduled the paternity test at a little clinic in Port Angeles. He would go in and I could take Charlie in any time on Tuesday or Wednesday. I figured it was bullshit anyway, but the sooner the better. It was a quick test. A little swab of his cheek and they gave him a sucker. He was thrilled. They told us it would take approximately 2 weeks.

Alice freaked when I told her what Edward had asked me to do.

"Is he fucking blind?" she screeched.

I chuckled as a few people around us glared at Alice for her colorful language. She hissed at the realization of where we were and mouthed the word 'sorry' a couple of times.

"I don't know. He either didn't get a good look at Charlie or he's completely in denial," I sighed. I was now speaking much quieter as to not disturb the other patrons. "It doesn't fucking matter. I already know what the results will be. If it makes him feel better, then whatever."

After my meltdown I had finally been able to slip comfortably back into defensive mode. I felt stronger now that I had been able to purge some of my more fragile emotions. Not that I was looking for another confrontation, but if it happened, I was confident that I could stand my ground.

"What a jerk," she grumbled. "I can't even look at him without wanting to smack him silly. Mom is going to shit a brick. I probably shouldn't tell Emmett and Rose, he may not survive their opinions. Emmett's going through serious Charlie withdrawals Bella. I'm surprised he hasn't shown up on your doorstep to try to steal him away.

"He's been texting me at least ten times a day asking for a '_play date_'," I laughed as I quoted the big goof using my fingers.

"Are you really going to stay away as long as Edward has his head up his ass," Alice sighed.

"No," I shook my head. I'll give him until the results come in, but after that he's either going to have to deal or stay away. I can't keep refusing Esme's dinner invites. You all have been way too supportive and I promised not to take him away from you. I'll keep my promise Alice, regardless of what Edward has to say about it."

Alice grinned at me. "Good, because that play set is being erected as we speak and I can't wait to show him."

I groaned and shook my head.

We were sitting at one of those bouncy castle places where you pay $8 and your kid gets to wear him/herself out jumping for a couple of hours. Yeah, I had a twenty-visit punch-card. It wore Charlie completely out and he also got a chance to socialize with other kids, which was an added benefit. It was teaming with toddlers today, hence the nasty looks we were getting from the other parents when our discussion included foul language. Every so often either Alice or I would get in to jump with him, but after a while, Alice's lunch break was over and she had to go back to work.

Later that night I got a phone call from Esme. "Bella, darling, would you like to have lunch with me on Friday?" she asked gently.

"Uh, sure, Esme I'd love to. Is this a Charlie lunch or a no Charlie lunch?"

"Do you think you'll be able to find a babysitter? Not that I don't adore spending time with my grandbaby, but I'd like to just sit with you if that's okay."

"I can drop him off with dad at the station. If he needs to go on a call his receptionist Amanda loves taking care of Charlie, but honestly, eighty percent of what my dad does is done behind his desk these days so…."

"Wonderful. We really miss you guys, Bella."

"I know Esme, but the last thing I want to do right now is provoke Edward. Especially with Charlie around."

"We'll figure out something, sweetheart," she soothed.

"Thanks, Esme."

XXXXXX

Two days later I sat in the Cullen's kitchen chopping carrots for a salad as Esme put together some turkey on rye sandwiches. I looked around nervously, hoping that Edward wasn't home.

"He's at the library," Esme said knowingly without looking at me.

"Oh, uh, that's good," I breathed out. "So, how's work going?" I asked, trying to change the subject quickly.

"The firm is doing really well. We've even gotten a few calls for homes in Seattle," she said excitedly. "I've had to hire on two new designers already just to get through the projects that we have on the calendar. We're booked solid for at least the next six months."

"That's wonderful, Esme," I grinned. "How is Alice doing?"

"She's been amazing. Not only is she really getting the hang of the designing aspect, but she's also doing so well with a lot of the project management. I feel bad that I've put so much on her plate so early on, but she seems to be handling it well."

"Alice is happiest when her schedule is so full she can't even go to the bathroom," I laughed.

Esme grinned at me. "I suppose you're right. I have to remind her to take breaks, like she did when you guys had lunch the other day."

"It was really nice just to hang out with her for an hour. How she had the energy to bounce around with Charlie is beyond me."

Esme set two bowls down and I filled them with salad. She slid my plate in front of me and I went about putting some dressing on my salad and digging in. We munched quietly for a few minutes. I finished my salad and started in on my sandwich.

"I know it's not my place," she started quietly, "but for what it's worth, I'm sorry about Edward."

I furrowed my brow. "Why are you apologizing for him, Esme?"

"Because he's my son," she sighed. "I...I never thought he could be capable of such cruel behavior.

"This isn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. He's a big boy, he can take responsibility for himself."

"Yes, but he...he asked you for a paternity test?"

I nodded.

"You have to believe me when I tell you that none of us are questioning it, Bella. We all know that he is Edward's."

"Thank you," I smiled slightly. "But apparently, not _everyone _believes me."

Esme took a sip of sparkling water and breathed in and out loudly.

"He knows, Bella. He knows that Charlie is his, he's just not ready to admit it to himself yet. Both Carlisle and I have tried to talk to him about it, but he refuses."

I bit into my sandwich and chewed aggressively as I tried to sort out my thoughts.

"I appreciate your support, Esme, all of you, but Edward and I need to sort this out for ourselves. I've told him where I stand on this whole situation and he has a decision to make. I've given him two weeks after he gets the official results Esme, after that I'll take matters into my own hands. I refuse to put mine and Charlie's lives on hold because Edward can't grow up."

Esme swallowed and nodded in understanding. We let a few moments of silence pass between us before she spoke again.

"Bella?" Esme started again quietly. There was a cautiousness to her voice that made me a little nervous. Esme's tone was usually so comforting. "I have a proposition for you."

I wasn't sure how to respond so I just nodded for her to continue. She lowered her head and didn't make eye contact with me.

"Well, you know the other day when you said that you were going to start looking for an apartment?"

I nodded.

"It's just that we have so much space around here."

I immediately knew where she was going with this. I set the last bite of my sandwich down on my plate and waited until my mouth was empty before speaking.

"Absolutely not, Esme, I appreciate the gesture, but I'm trying to re-establish my independence," I said shaking my head. "Besides, if Edward forces my hand, how could I possibly live here and follow through. That wouldn't really be fair for any of us."

"Just hear me out sweetie," she begged.

It was against my better judgment, but I agreed.

"We have a full apartment above the garage. It has three bedrooms, three baths, a full kitchen and living room. It's a good fifteen hundred square feet, it has its own separate entrance and it's fully furnished and completely soundproofed."

_Oh my God it sounds perfect…Except for the fact that I would practically be living with my asshole baby daddy and there is absolutely no way that I could afford it._

I took a deep breath and started to speak, but Esme stopped me. She placed her hand on top of mine and looked directly into my eyes.

"Please, Bella, at least consider it. It's just wasted space right now. You wouldn't have to pay rent so you could save up for grad school or a bigger place in the future. Whatever you want. It has its own utilities so you could always pay those if you want to, but please, you've done so much on your own already. We haven't been there for you when you needed us the most, all we want to do is help you to provide a solid future for yourself and our grandson."

I didn't want to consider it. It was too close to _him_. I needed to move on. I was pretty sure that Edward was not going to want anything to do with Charlie. I was okay with that, but living under the same roof, or even next door to each other would just make things worse.

"Esme, I…."

"I can ask Edward to leave." Esme said hurriedly.

"Jesus, Esme. You are not going to kick your own son out of his house so that you can put me up."

"That's not what I would be doing, Bella. Edward is an adult; he can take care of himself. He's lived on his own for years."

"So am I. So _have_ I. I've taken perfectly good care of Charlie, we don't need handouts," I snapped.

"Darling, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry. I….I just feel like, like we failed you. If Charlie had been born a Cullen…"

"But he wasn't, Esme. He was born a Swan and I'm damn proud of it. I may not have been able to spoil him rotten or give him everything he could possibly want, but I did the best that I could. He is a good boy. He is sweet, kind, loving and funny."

I could see Esme's eyes beginning to water.

"Oh God, none of this is coming out right. I don't want to make you angry sweetheart. We just want you to be close. We want to be able to come home and see our grandson every day. We want to make up for lost time." Esme started to cry. Big fat tears were now silently dripping down her cheeks.

I sighed. "Look. I appreciate your offer, but right now, it's just not an option."

She gave me a sad and watery smile and nodded in understanding.

The rest of lunch was uneventful. Esme convinced me to allow Charlie to go over and play with the brand spanking new Rainbow play set when Edward wasn't around. It was called The Super Rainbow Double Whammy Cabin Package with Dual Lofts. It was fucking massive. I could have moved into _that_ and lived comfortably. Oh, and by the way, I looked up how much that play set cost. Twenty THOUSAND dollars. That is a twenty with three zeros. I'm pretty sure that I had a fucking coronary right before my brain hemorrhaged from shock.

In any case, they couldn't return it so I had to suck it up. It wasn't my money and it wasn't my property. I gave Esme a hug and a gentle kiss on the cheek before heading back to the station to pick up Charlie.

As I expected, my dad was still there, sitting with Charlie on his lap. They were watching a show about proper fishing techniques on the Internet. I smiled as I watched my dad pointing at the screen and talking into Charlie's ear. My dad looked up and grinned sheepishly at me. He really was the best grandpa out there.

Sometimes I wondered what kind of grandma my mom would have made. She hadn't really been up to the task of being a mom to me, but maybe things could have been different. People can change right?

EPOV

I couldn't believe her. She actually thought she was justified in keeping her little secret. Okay, yeah, I probably would have been upset about her being pregnant, but I wasn't a total bastard...not all the time anyway. But I guess she didn't know that. She didn't know anything. The way I had treated her that night had made her feel like a whore. Like she wasn't any better than the girls who threw themselves at me. God what I wouldn't do to change what I had done to her. I wasn't going to dwell on it though, there was nothing I could do, but that didn't mean I didn't want to. Just like she said, she couldn't go back and change the fact that she had kept the pregnancy from me. We had both made mistakes.

Everyone kept assuming I would have asked her to get an abortion. Would I have? I didn't honestly know. I had wanted her for so long; it would have been a reason to keep her. But that's not who I was. I didn't keep girls. And I didn't deserve to keep her.

And here I was screaming at her once again. I was angry and I was hurt and I was completely mind-fucked over this whole situation. One minute I wanted to kiss her and the next minute I wanted to kill her. What the fuck was wrong with me? I didn't intend to be an asshole. I didn't want to be so mean to her and yet, I couldn't stop myself. The shit that had come out of my mouth I instantly wanted to retract. I accused her of living off of her father. What a completely asinine thing to say. I was doing the same fucking thing. And asking her for a DNA test? It just slipped out. You hear stories all the time about men raising these kids only to have it revealed years later that they actually belong to some other guy. Shit, Maury Povich had made an entire career out of those cases. But once it was out there I couldn't take it back. I needed to be strong. I needed to not crack. I needed to be right!

But the fact was, I may not have gotten a good look, but I saw enough of that little guy to know what the chances were that he wasn't mine.

She wanted me to give up my rights. Shit, really? Was I that bad of a guy? Was that something that I wanted? Now that I knew, could I just walk away again?

XXXXXX

Bella and I didn't speak at all after my unannounced visit. I texted her to tell her where to go for the paternity test and when, but that was it. I occasionally heard my family talk about them. Bella had gotten a job as a research assistant in Port Angeles working for some hot shot psychologist. Now my comment about living off of her father made me want to crawl into a dark hole even more.

An obscenely large play set had been erected in our backyard and I noticed more and more toys collecting both inside and outside of the house. I had even stubbed my toe on some god forsaken metal dump truck that had been left on the patio. I felt a tug in my chest every single time I spotted one of his things. I wanted to see him, but I didn't. I was scared to look into his face, to see what I wasn't ready to admit.

Exactly thirteen days after that little Q-tip swab, the results were in. I stood in my kitchen with my entire family around. Alice had grabbed the mail earlier in the day and snagged the results before I even had a chance to see if it was there.

"Eeeedddddwwwwaaaarrrddd." she sang as I got home from work. Our entire family was already milling about, which made me think that Alice had already told them what she had in her possession. My mom was hovering over a stockpot stirring what smelled like beef stew. I'm pretty sure that I was salivating. I was fucking starving. Everyone else pretended that they had a purpose there, but I'm pretty sure they just didn't want to miss out on anything." You got some maaaiiiillll."

My stomach dropped and my appetite suddenly disappeared. I knew exactly what she was waving around. I tried to snatch it out of her hand, but the quick little demon girl danced away with it still clutched in her wicked little claws.

"Nuh uh. Not until you promise to open it up right here, right now."

"This is none of your fucking business," I growled.

"Oh, on the contrary,bro," Emmett bellowed. "You've not only put Bella through hell over the last few weeks, but you've made us all suffer. Bella has avoided us all so as not to piss you off and it's about fucking time we get her and little C back for more than just an hour long visit. That's our nephew and their grandson," he said pointing at my parents. "It's everyone's business."

I wanted to argue. I wanted to shout at them all that it hadn't been proved yet, but Alice held the proof in her hand and in a matter of seconds we would all know. I mean, we'd all know for sure.

Who the fuck was I kidding?

"Fine, give it to me."

She set it in my hand and I held it tightly. My nerves were shot. It's one thing to be told you're a father, it's a whole other thing to have the genetic proof in your hand.

"Open it," Rose ordered.

"I am," I yelled.

Carlisle handed me a letter opener and pretended to read a magazine that also came in the mail. I knew he was pretending because it was called 'Quilting Daily' or some shit like that. I nodded in thanks and slid it into the corner of the envelope, slicing across the top and pulling out the piece of paper inside. I slowly opened it up, my fingers shaking.

"Motherfucker!" I gasped, throwing the letter down onto the island.

Alice snatched it up and opened it, a wicked little smile spreading from ear to ear before she handed it to my father. The letter made its way around the room as my hands tore through my hair.

"We fucking told you!" Emmett howled, clapping his hands together loudly. "Ninety-nine point nine percent accuracy."

I looked at my parents. Carlisle's arm was wrapped tightly around my mom. Her head was tucked into his shoulder and her eyes looked like they were beginning to tear up. They were both looking at me, but neither one said anything.

"What a stupid douche," Rose muttered under her breath.

"Do you have all the proof you need now?" Alice asked in that sickly sweet voice that always made me want to cringe. " Will you finally at least look at your son?"

"Ahhhh Fuck!" I screamed. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and I needed to get out. I had asked for this. Why had I asked for this? Now I couldn't even pretend that she was lying. And chances were that she had already gotten her letter. She knew that I knew. Should I expect to hear from her? Would she call me up to gloat? She said she wasn't interested in my money, but now that I had given her hard proof, would she change her mind? I didn't know. The fact was, even though I had practically grown up with her around, I had no idea who she was, at least not now. I had a son with this person that I barely knew.

I blew out of the kitchen and ran up to my bedroom, leaving my family behind me. I wanted to leave the house, but the last time that had happened was the night Bella had told me and I woke up in some strange woman's bed. I just couldn't do that again.

I flopped down on my bed and buried my face in my pillow. I wanted to be angry, but the fact was, that I had spent three weeks being angry and I just didn't have the energy for it anymore. Now, well now I was just plain scared.

I heard a knock on the door, but I didn't respond to it. I didn't need anyone telling me for the millionth time that I was an asshole or a douchebag. I already knew that. The door opened and then clicked shut again.

"Go away," I mumbled into the pillow.

The bed dipped. "Son," Carlisle's voice spoke softly. It was warm and non-accusatory. I didn't, however, lift my head.

"Edward."

"What am I going to do, Dad?" I nearly sobbed.

He placed his hand on my shoulder and gripped it firmly.

"That's up to you, son. What do you want to do?"

I sat up, facing him, and pulled my knees into my chest.

"I want to go back."

Carlisle sighed. "That's not an option, Edward."

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I have a kid. I have a three-year-old kid that I didn't even know existed three weeks ago. I don't know how to be a dad."

"Do you think I was any different when I met your mother?"

"What?"

"Your mother was raising three small children when I fell in love with her. I wasn't even thirty. Don't you think that the idea of being a dad scared the shit out of me?"

"It's not the same thing."

"Of course it's not, but you need to look at things from another perspective. When I met you, Emmett, and Alice, I didn't know anything about you. I didn't know when you were born or how much you weighed at birth. I didn't know when you walked or talked for the first time. I didn't know any of your likes or dislikes. But I learned. It took time and a lot of effort and patience. I thought for sure that I was going to screw you up, but Esme supported me and she supported my relationship with you."

I laughed humorlessly. "Bella made it perfectly clear how she feels about my relationship with….uh, with….."

I don't know why it was so hard to say his name. I had said it before, but then he was just Bella's kid. Now he was my kid too and it seemed weird.

"With Charlie?"

"Yeah. She wants me to give up my rights to him."

"What?" Carlisle looked confused.

"She asked me to sign away my rights. I don't know Dad, maybe I should. Maybe it would be better for all of us if I just signed the fucking papers and we could all just move on."

"Okay, first of all, Edward, you are not signing any papers. Second of all, we will not all just be moving on. We love that little boy and we love Bella and regardless of what you decide to do, they are both a part of this family and they will stay that way. You must have misheard her."

"I know what I heard, Dad. She said she doesn't want me coming in and out of his life and she doesn't want him being around any of my girlfriends."

I saw Carlisle take in a shaky breath.

"We've already had this conversation with Bella, son. She's not going to take him away from us. All she's doing is protecting him. She's right, you go through women like you go through socks and Charlie can't be exposed to that. I trust Bella. She's been nothing but accommodating and supportive of our relationship with Charlie."

"She fucking kept him a secret for three years. You call that accommodating? You trust someone who lied to you? To all of us?"

I was so fucking frustrated. My head ached and my chest hurt. Being a father was not something that I had ever considered and I had no idea where to go from there.

"You need to talk to her Edward."

"I've already talked to her."

"No, you've yelled and screamed at her. You've fought with her and accused her. You haven't actually talked to her."

Carlisle had a point. As much as I didn't want to admit it, I hadn't exactly been receptive—at all.

"And you need to meet Charlie," Carlisle said with a slight smile on his lips.

"He is one of the most amazing kids I have ever known. He reminds me so much of you when you were little."

"He does?" I asked, before I could catch myself.

With just that small statement I found myself curious. I didn't want to be curious.

"Yes, Edward, he does," he answered as he stood up. "Call Bella."

He was at the door when he turned around.

"I want you to think long and hard before you decide whether or not you want to be a part of Charlie's life, Edward. It may not be what you wanted, but would you really be able to live with yourself knowing you gave up on your own son?"

**XXXXXXXX**

**AN: So there you have it. Yes, Edward and Bella's conversation was a little rough, but it had to be done. I know a lot of people are thinking that Bella should just serve him with termination papers, but in her head she's finally giving him the chance to make the decision that she denied him four years ago. This is her own internal attempt at some redemption.**

**I'm hoping this will be the last time that we address the "what would Edward have done" topic. It feels like I've gone there way too much, but when I tried to take it out, things didn't flow well so I left it there. Oh, I lie, there might be one last time, but not for a while and it's kind of in a different context. Hmmm.**

**What do you think of Esme's offer? I know that so many of you want Bella to remain completely financially independent, but please just put yourself in her shoes for a moment. It's definitely an offer that is worth considering.**

**Okay, I realize that many of you are probably annoyed at the fact that the siblings all felt it was necessary to butt into Edward and Bella's paternity business, but it wouldn't have beenin character if they all just f**ked off and minded their own business.**

**And what of Carlisle's advice?**

**So the Rainbow play systems really does have a Super Rainbow Double Whammy Cabin Package with Dual Lofts. I'm not positive about the price so I just guessed based on my memory of the catalog they sent me a few years ago. Did you know that there are actually playsets that can cost up to $40,000? Amazing. Ours cost $150 on end of summer clearance. LOL. You can check it out here. http:/dev(dot)rainbowplay(dot)com/index(dot)php/swing-sets/package/super-rainbow-double-whammy-cabin-package-with-dual-lofts/**


	11. Baby Steps

**AN: Once again, you all have completely stunned me by your response to this story. There are such passionate emotions and I love them all.**

**Thank you so much to Hayley the Wayward girl for another completely incredible banner. The link is on my profile. Check it out.**

**Thank you to Mel and Mollie for pre-reading. And to all the girls on the Twilighted thread for supporting me in my little freak out. I love you all.**

**Now lets see a some Edward/Little C interaction shall we.**

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 10: Baby Steps

I waited two days for Bella's phone call. The one where she called me up and told me what a fucking dick I was for ever implying that she was lying about Charlie. Okay, I did more than imply, but whatever, she never called. I asked Alice if she had gotten the results, and she had confirmed that she had, but apparently didn't even open the envelope. Bella always knew what the results would say. She didn't need a fucking piece of paper to tell her.

I thought about calling her, but me being me, I didn't have the balls. Calling her would have meant that I was admitting that I was wrong. I knew I was going to have to do it eventually, but I had to learn how to swallow my pride first. That . . . was not an easy task. I was also well aware that my family was waiting for me to get my head out of my ass. Alice had said those exact words to me multiple times, but the more they nagged me about it, the more stubborn I became.

Bella had given me two weeks to make a decision. How could I possibly make a decision like that in two weeks? Emmett said it should be an easy decision. Alice said that there wasn't one to be made at all. But they didn't understand. It was the rest of my life. It was the rest of Bella's and Charlie's lives.

It was a big fucking decision.

After my talk with Carlisle, my parents had graciously refrained from any additional input. I knew what they wanted, they never hid it, but they didn't hassle me either.

Jasper had been exceedingly quiet about the whole thing. After our argument the night we went to the bar, he had avoided any major discussion with me at all. He would stand behind Alice or at her side as she spoke to me, but every time I looked at him his face was void of any emotion. It was hard to handle; he was my best friend. I knew that he didn't like how I lived my life, but he never verbally criticized me and never had he completely ignored me like he was. He'd always been my go-to guy when I had a problem; always listened and gave me good advice. He knew almost everything about me . . . almost. Even though he didn't ever make a comment, I knew he was siding with Bella. That thought alone was excruciating. I had finally done something that caused the most patient and understanding person in my life to abandon me. I was an asshole of epic proportions.

It was Wednesday. Work had been a total bitch. I had been there for just over a week, and so far, it was going really well. I was attending to a little bit of everything and getting trained in the basics of medical care, learning how to draw blood and seeing to small wounds. I had learned how to do sutures, too. First thing in the morning, I saw a family with six kids, all of whom had lice. The youngest was six months, the eldest was ten. I had to wash their hair with this medicated shampoo, and I spent the rest of the day itching. It was gross. I also sutured the forehead of a middle aged drunk woman who kept trying to grab my junk and repeatedly told me how good she could make me feel. Uh, no thank you. Who the hell is drunk at two in the afternoon?

I got sneezed on eight times and thrown up on twice. Patient after patient and I was fucking exhausted. Working at the clinic wasn't exactly what I had expected, but I was getting a lot of really good hands on experience. Dr. Oleander also talked about sending me to some classes so that I could get additional training. Most of it would be things that a nurse typically did, but I didn't really care. It would just make me that much better of a doctor in the long run, so I was excited about doing it.

Jessica had been extremely annoying. I was always greeted with a sexual innuendo first thing in the morning and as the days went on, her hints became more and more aggressive. Today, she actually walked into the bathroom while I was taking a leak. I had locked the door, but the little cow used the key to open it up, claiming that she didn't realize that anyone was in there. She got an eye full, too. She not-so-subtly licked her lips, staring at my dick before backing out. If she kept this up, I had no doubt that she'd eventually full on proposition me. I didn't even want to think about accepting, especially from her, but my hand was getting really fucking tired. Thoroughly exhausted, I practically stumbled through my front door. I heard laughing from the direction of the kitchen, and the smell of my mother's lasagna was making my mouth water. I had only had time for a half a meatball sub from Subway at lunch, and I was starving. I walked through the foyer, towards the back of the house and froze. Bella was standing at the island with a huge smile on her face. She was absolutely fucking stunning. I hadn't seen her smile like that since we were kids. I felt a pang of guilt as I realized that I was probably the reason for that. She was watching Emmett balance a spoon on his nose for his tiny audience. Charlie was sitting on the granite counter top. He was facing away from me so I couldn't see his face, but I could hear his giggling.

"Do it to me, Emmie," he laughed and clapped his hands.

I watched as Em breathed onto the spoon and then stuck it to the end of Charlie's nose. I looked over the rest of my family. My mom was at the stove preparing what appeared to be her famous cheesy garlic bread. Carlisle was standing beside her, leaning against the counter top. He had a glass of wine in one hand and a medical journal in the other. His reading glasses were perched on the tip of his nose, but his eyes were focused on Emmett and Charlie rather than on what he was reading, and he was smiling broadly. Alice and Bella had their heads together and were giggling. Both had almost empty wine glasses in their hands. Rose was standing directly behind Emmett grinning madly.

I knew that they were trying to have a baby of their own. I had overheard Alice and my mom talking about it. Of course, Emmett was in his element playing with Charlie. He had always loved kids. I think it had something to do with their similar mentality.

I didn't see Jasper, but knowing him, he wasn't far. He liked to just observe people and, as I was currently finding out, sometimes it was best to do that just out of the way.

My mom had told me that Bella and Charlie would be coming over for dinner, but I had completely spaced that it was tonight. I wasn't upset. I wasn't angry. I was . . . reserved. The fight had gone out of me, at least for the time being. Once Carlisle left my room after we talked, I cried like a fucking baby for nearly two hours. As embarrassing as it would have been to do that in front of anyone else, it was actually quite cathartic. I'm not sure that I could ever fully express why I was crying, not out loud, not to anyone else, probably not even to myself. This was not how I had pictured my life.

I looked back at Bella just as she lifted her eyes to meet mine. I saw her take a deep breath and bite her lip.

I don't know how long we stood there staring at each other, but I soon realized that the room had grown silent, and everyone else was also staring at me, including Charlie.

"Who's dat, Uncle Emmie?" he asked.

Okay, so for some reason, that question kind of hurt. The fact that my kid was asking my brother who I was just didn't seem right.

_My kid. My kid. My kid?_

Did I even have a right to call him that? He didn't even know who I was. Fuck.

"That's Edward, baby. He's Emmie and Alice's brother," Bella responded softly.

"Come on in, dear," my mom said as she pulled the lasagna out of the oven."Dinner will be ready in about ten minutes."

"Do I have time for a quick shower?" I asked realizing that I probably smelled absolutely disgusting.

"Make it snappy," she teased.

I took the stairs two at a time and was in and out of the shower and dressed in less than five minutes. When I got back down to the kitchen, no one had really moved. Walking in there was awkward to say the least. Everyone was fairly quiet. The laughing that I had initially encountered was gone, replaced by quiet chatter between different sets of people. I felt bad that my presence had depressed the mood. I watched as Alice refilled Bella's wine glass and then as Bella took an extra big gulp. I didn't know where to stand. The closer I got to Charlie, the more antsy I became.

"Wine, son?" Carlisle had gone back to reading his journal, but his hand was outstretched holding a full glass of red wine.

"Thanks," I sighed, taking it appreciatively.

"I'm glad you could make it," he said in a voice so low that only I could hear him.

I simply nodded and took a sip.

"Charlie, honey, do you want to help your mama take a couple of things to the table?" my mom asked.

"Okay Gramma," the little boy grinned.

I had a full view of him now that I was standing next to Carlisle. I should have looked at him this closely a long time ago. I never would have said some of the dickhead things that I had said to Bella. Everyone was right. I never could have denied this little boy. If I didn't know any better, I'd say that there was some fucked up cloning experiment going on in Forks, Washington.

I took in an extremely choppy breath and felt a lump in my throat and that stupid fucking pressure in my chest. He caught me looking at him and grinned widely. I couldn't help but smile back. Completely unaware of our silent exchange, Bella quickly snatched him off the counter, set him on the hardwoods, and grabbed a couple of glasses from my mom before heading into the dining room.

"You need to be nice to her," my mom scolded.

"What did I do?" I asked innocently.

"Nothing . . . yet," she said, giving me a pointed look.

_Nice to know you have such faith in me, Mom!_

Everyone began to filter out of the room, and my mom handed me two pot holders and asked me to bring the lasagna to the table as she took the garlic bread out of the oven.

Upon entering the dining room, I found that everyone other than Mom and me were already seated. The only spot open other than my mom's seat, was directly across from Bella and Charlie. I looked up at Bella, but she refused to meet my eyes. She hadn't said a single word to me since I had left her house over two weeks ago. I don't know what I wanted her to say to me, but the tension was getting uncomfortable and the night had just started.

I looked over at Charlie, who was sitting in a wooden booster seat that my mother must have bought to keep at the house. It looked kind of like a step stool, but it had straps to buckle him in.

He had a plastic plate with a train on it in front of him and a huge helping of lasagna.

"That's a lot of food for such a little person," I said to him quietly.

He looked up at me and scowled. I couldn't help but snicker, because it was almost an exact replica of Bella's scowl when she was annoyed. I saw that scowl a lot when we were in high school and several times more recently as well.

"I'm not wittle," he grumbled.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Bella's lips twitch before she shoved a big saucy bite into her mouth.

My mouth gaped open. I had no idea how to respond to him. Luckily, Alice came to my rescue, whether she realized it or not.

"Of course you're not, sweetheart." She winked at him. He quickly went back to his lasagna, shoveling it into his mouth and letting the cheese drip down his chin. I chuckled silently.

"Mom, this cheesy garlic bread is fucking . . ." I stopped myself.

_Dammit!_

"Edward!" my mom gasped.

Again, I looked towards Bella, and she was suppressing a grin against her wine glass. She still hadn't looked at me. Charlie wasn't paying any attention to me or anyone else for that matter, but I still felt guilty.

"Sorry," I muttered. "I meant to say that it's really good."

The rest of dinner I decided to keep my mouth shut. I didn't want to screw up anything else.

After everyone had finished, Carlisle got up and began clearing the plates. He kissed my mother's forehead as he passed her, and she smiled up at him. It was such a simple gesture that said so much about their relationship.

I decided that I should help and stood up, took half the plates from his hands, and followed him into the kitchen.

"You're doing fine, son," he said slapping me gently on the shoulder.

"Bella won't even look at me."

"She doesn't want to upset you. She's here because your mother begged her to come over, but I think she's worried that she'll set you off."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked defensively. Did my family really think I was going to start a fight with Bella in front of Charlie? I mean really?

Carlisle raised his eyebrows at me. He didn't have to say anything, I got the picture.

"She's trying to let you do this at your own pace."

"Oh, is that what she's doing, Dad?" I snapped.

He looked at me as he pulled a homemade cherry pie out of the warmer and began slicing it into pieces before plating them. He always could say so much without even opening his mouth. It was kind of annoying. The pie looked fucking delicious. I leaned over one of the pieces and inhaled.

"Oh my God, that smells amazing."

Carlisle smirked as he added a scoop of vanilla ice cream to each place and handed me the cinnamon sticks to garnish. Yes, I knew what garnish meant. That's what happens when you live with my mother and Alice, you learn fancy fruity words for doing simple things.

"Yes, that's what she's trying to do. Despite what's happening between you two right now, she's a good person, son."

I had never doubted that Bella was a good person underneath it all. Yes, I questioned her motives, but she had always been so sweet and innocent, well, at least until I got my hands on her. Could that have changed so much? The last few weeks had really fucked up my senses; distorted my thoughts and emotions. Now, I was just plain confused. Part of me still wanted to hate her. Another part of me wanted to hug her and tell her how fucking sorry I was. And there was still that part of me, although it was buried behind several layers of emotions, that wanted a re-do. To make all the hurt that I caused her to go away and show her what her first time should have been like.

"I'm trying to come to terms with this, Dad. I really am."

"I know you are, and Bella understands that. You both just need to be patient with each other."

I grabbed a few of the plates and took them to the dining room. Carlisle followed behind me. I set the first plate down in front of Charlie and watched his face light up before I put my other plates down in front of the ladies. Carlisle set down the rest of the plates.

"Bella, this is really exquisite," Mom moaned after she took her first bite.

I whipped my head up to look at her.

"You made this?"

She just nodded again without lifting her head. I took a quick forkful and let my eyes roll back in my head at how absolutely fucking sinful it tasted. It was the perfect combination of sweet and tart with a little bit of spice. The heat of the pie along with the cold of the ice cream together on my tongue was almost orgasmic. Not quite, but almost.

For the next ten minutes, the room was filled with the smacking of lips, the clicking of silverware against the plates and moans of pleasure. It was Bella who startled me out of my food coma. She stood up and collected her and Charlie's plates without a word.

"Bella, darling, leave it please. Why don't you go clean Charlie up, and I'll take care of the dishes okay?" Mom smiled.

"Thank you, Esme," Bella said softly. "Come on, baby, we need to go to the bathroom."

"I can do it by mysef." He hopped down from the booster seat after Bella unbuckled him and ran ahead of her as if he was in some kind of a race. I watched them as they left.

Everyone, but my mom and Alice left the room. I sat silently, knowing that something was coming.

"I've asked her to move in," my mom spoke.

"What?" I nearly screeched.

"To the garage apartment."

My mouth dropped open, and I gaped at her.

"Why . . . why on earth would you do that?"

"Because she needs a place to live, Edward."

"She lives with her dad."

"That house has two tiny little bedrooms. Bella not only shares a _room_ with Charlie, she shares a _bed_ with him, because there is no room for him to have a bed of his own. She needs more space. They both do."

"Okay, fine, but why here?"

"Because we have the space to offer. That apartment hasn't been used consistently in nearly a decade, and it's perfect for them."

"Did you even consider how I would feel about it?"

I was starting to panic. There really was no reason for it other than the fact that I was afraid of having her so close. Were they trying to force me to make a decision? I know that Bella wanted to leave it up to me, but by moving in, she would essentially take that decision away from me. Was she really going to do that? Take my decision away from me again? I felt my heart rate speed up.

"Honestly, Edward, I was more concerned about where my grandchild was going to live. Port Angeles may not be that far away, but what happens if Bella can't find a place she can afford there? Sequim? Port Townsend? Seattle? I have spent enough time away from my grandson, but believe it or not, Bella was concerned about how you would feel about it."

_She was?_

"I offered to ask you to leave. She refused to let me do that."

I just stared at my mother. That was some fucked up shit right there.

"You were going to . . . to kick me out? Of my own house?"

My mother sighed. "Edward, I love you, you know that. But you are an adult. An adult who is physically, emotionally, and financially prepared to move out of your parents' house. Not to say that Bella is not prepared to be on her own, because, believe me, she is, but she has nothing. She has skimped and saved for the last four years to make sure that she has enough money to take care of _your_ child. She has never asked us for anything, and she flat out refuses to allow us to assist her in all ways financial. If giving her a place to live, even if it's only for a few months, helps her in any way, we're going to do it."

"So, do I have to go?" I asked my mother sadly.

I didn't want to leave my parents house. Not yet anyway. It wasn't that I couldn't care for myself. I had lived on my own for four years, but I enjoyed living with my parents. I loved spending time with my family in general. I would be heading out to medical school in a year, and I would probably never live with them again. Yeah, Rose and Emmett were moving out, but Alice and Jasper had no plans to leave.

"No, sweetheart. Like I said, Bella refused that option. She hasn't even accepted my offer yet."

Alice cleared her throat and I startled. I had forgotten that she was still there.

"I think she'd be more likely to accept if you offered her an olive branch, Edward."

"What?" I asked stupidly.

"She doesn't want to force you into a decision. That's why she's been staying away. She doesn't want to make you uncomfortable."

"Okay, well, her living here would make me uncomfortable," I grumbled.

Both Alice and my mother were glaring at me.

"Fine, Edward, be a dick," Alice glared as she stood up and walked away.

My mom shook her head. "I thought I had raised you better than this," she said quietly."Apparently, I was wrong."

And then, I was alone.

I continued to sit at the table for a while, finishing my wine and trying not to think about what my mother had just said to me. I must have been in my own little world, because I didn't realize that I had company until a tiny little hand rested on my forearm. I jumped a little and saw Charlie looking at me curiously.

"What are you doin?" he asked.

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "Thinking."

I looked around to see why he was in here by himself and saw Bella standing in the archway that led to the living room. She was watching us, but there didn't appear to be any particular emotion on her face.

"Do you wanna see what I can do?" Charlie asked, bringing my attention back to him.

"What can you do?" I smiled slightly.

It was strange seeing and talking to him. I really didn't know what to do around kids. I had never thought much about them, other than the fact that I really didn't want to have one with Tanya. And here he was, my very own flesh and blood, asking me questions and looking at me like there was something wrong with me.

He bit his lip and furrowed his brow. I nearly choked in laughter as this child that looked just like me, once again morphed into the spitting image of Bella.

"You hafta come with me, Eward," he said grabbing my hand and trying to pull me into a standing position. I hesitated only for a second before standing up and following him. He did not let go of my hand, and I could feel his tiny little palm wrapped around my second and third fingers.

"Where are we going?"

"To the pinano."

"The pinano?"

_What the hell is a pinano?_

We walked past Bella. She kept her head down, her arms folded across her chest. Her teeth were working on her lower lip.

"Are you coming, Mommy?"

Bella smiled.

"I'll be there in a minute, baby," she cooed.

I followed Charlie down the hallway until we reached the music room. _Oh! The piano._

Oh, shit. He was going to bang on my piano.

"Uh, Charlie."

"I'm weawy good. Gramma says so." He grinned as he opened up the lid.

It was at that moment that I made the connection. The picture on the fridge that I had found my first morning back. My mom's statement that a friend's little boy drew it for her. Bella was the friend, and Charlie was the little boy. I felt a flash of irritation that they had all known and no one told me, but it passed as I watched Charlie sit down on the bench and begin to tap the keys. He held them down and put his ear close. I watched him with rapt fascination.

After doing this to several keys, he began to put sounds together. I listened to him for twenty minutes while he kept adding notes. There was no song, but the notes fit together beautifully. The way that kid caressed the keys made my chest ache. If I had never gotten the genetic proof that Charlie was mine, this alone would have secured my belief.

"This is his favorite thing to do here," Bella's soft voice startled me. "He begs to play."

I turned to face her, and she finally met my eyes.

"I used to do the same thing," I whispered.

"I know." She smiled. "Your mom told me. I love watching him. He seems so at home sitting there. He's a fairly laid back kid to begin with, but when he's sitting at that piano, he's so focused, so relaxed."

I continued to watch him. He turned and looked up at me for the briefest of moments before returning his attention back to the piano. And then the familiar tune of 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star' began to fill the room. I barely noticed the fact that I had begun to smile. I watched as Bella settled herself into the leather sofa, looking completely in awe of her child . . . uh, our child. There were no other sounds in the room until he started to yawn. Bella glanced over at me, bit her lip and then stood up and walked in my direction.

"Charlie," she called. "It's time to head home, sweetie."

"I don't wanna go," Charlie whined.

"It's past your bedtime, baby, and you still need to take a bath."

Charlie wrinkled up his nose and scowled, but didn't argue. He slipped off of the bench and walked towards us. I thought he was going to go to Bella, but he didn't. He stopped in front of me and slipped his hand into mine again. Without a word he led me from the room and down the hallway towards the kitchen. My parents were there, and although I could see Carlisle trying to conceal his smile at the sight, my mother wasn't. She grinned loud and proud. I didn't know how to react to all of this. I was a little uncomfortable, but not as much as I thought I would be. It was just really weird.

"You heard him play?" she asked.

"Yes." I nodded. Charlie let go of my hand and walked in front of me.

Mom shot a look at Carlisle that I couldn't quite read. Suddenly, Charlie stopped walking and turned around, bumping into my legs. I stumbled backwards, not out of force, but from surprise, straight into Bella. I felt her falling. I took a giant step back to brace myself and wrapped my arm around her waist before she hit the floor.

"Jesus!" she cried.

"I'm sorry," I said, helping her up. I let my arm linger around her waist without realizing it.

"Uh, thanks, Edward," she mumbled, pulling away from me. I could feel myself heating up a little in embarrassment. I don't know why I had held on, I just did.

I turned around to face Charlie who looked a little sheepish.

"Sowy, Eward," he apologized.

"It's all right, buddy," I said, touching the top of his head. When I sat down at the island, Carlisle had his eyebrow arched.

"What?" I asked, a little annoyed.

"Nothing." He shrugged.

"Charlie and I need to get home," Bella spoke up. "He is exceptionally sleepy."

"I'm not sweepy," Charlie whined through another yawn.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Of course not." She then turned to my mom. "We're going to head out."

"Of course, dear," my mom said as she opened up her arms for Charlie, who jumped right into them. "Don't forget what we talked about, Bella. The offer stands."

Bella nodded. "I won't, Esme. Thank you. I . . . I just need some time to think about it."

She glanced at me and caught me staring. Her eyes quickly darted away again. My mom let go of Charlie and he hopped up in to Carlisle's arms.

"Bye, kiddo," he said tapping his cheek.

"Bye bye, Papa," Charlie responded, kissing him loudly.

"Why don't you go into the basement and say goodnight to everyone else real quick," Bella suggested.

Charlie tore away as Bella gathered their things. That kid was fucking fast. She spoke quietly to my mom, who was helping her.

"He's something else, isn't he?" Carlisle said, grabbing my shoulder firmly.

I just nodded not sure what else I was supposed to say. I'd spent all of two and half hours with him. I mean, he seemed like a cool little kid and all, but how did I know he wasn't really just on his best behavior.

Carlisle didn't push me. I think he realized that I was trying. Charlie was mine. He was my . . . my son. It didn't feel like he was my kid. Honestly, even though I now knew that he was, and he looked like me and he had obviously inherited some of my traits, I didn't think that what I felt was very fatherly. I mean, what exactly did that feel like?

They say that when a child is born, that most parents fall in love instantly. I wondered if that's how it was for Bella. Did she love him from the beginning? Did she resent him at first because of the situation like I did? And I did resent him, or at least the idea of him. I didn't know why. I guess that maybe I resented the fact that I didn't have a say in anything. I didn't even get to help name him. Hell, I didn't even know his full name. I had been too busy wallowing in self pity to ask. Had she given him the Cullen name? I doubted it. Especially since she never intended on telling me about him in the first place. The thought made the anger start to bubble up again, but it disappeared quickly as another realization hit. She never intended me to know, which meant she never intended to use my family's name or money for her own benefit.

I thought about all the other women it could have been. Every single one of them would have delighted in being able to name their kid Cullen. He probably would have been Edward Anthony Cullen Jr. had it been Jessica or Lauren. Tanya would have insisted that I marry her. God, I wanted to murder that bitch. She was actually trying to get pregnant. Bella hadn't been trying. Shit, had she even ever considered anything other than raising him herself? Adoption? Termination? I swallowed back a bit of bile that had made it's way to my throat at the idea. I mean, how do you look at a child and wish that they had never been born or that you never knew about them. You don't. And I didn't. Not now anyway. Shit, why did this have to be so complicated?

I was startled out of my revelations by Charlie bounding back into the room.

"Did you give hugs to everyone?" Bella asked.

"No."

"No?"

Charlie ran over, and before I could react, he was wrapped around my leg. My mouth opened and then closed before I finally just ran my hand through his hair and rested it at the back of his head.

"Goonigh, Eward," Charlie yawned.

"Goodnight, buddy," I said, closing my eyes briefly.

When I opened them, I looked up at Bella. Again, she was looking at me with an unreadable expression. She drew the corner of her lip into her mouth with her teeth and then pursed her lips together. Charlie let go of my leg and grabbed onto his mother's outstretched hand.

My parents and I followed them outside and as she was buckling Charlie into his car seat, I turned around. "Can you give us a minute?"

"Sure, son. Goodnight, Bella," Carlisle called out.

"Goodnight. Thank you," her muffled voice returned.

I watched as she shut the door and went around to get into the driver's side.

"Bella?"

She looked up at me, startled.

"Yes?"

I approached her so that I could speak quietly.

"What's his name?" I asked as I stopped, about two feet from her.

Her brow wrinkled in confusion.

"His whole name?" I clarified.

"Oh. Uh, Charles Anthony Swan," she said, looking anywhere but at me.

I swallowed really hard. I was right, she hadn't given him Cullen. But she had given him my name.

"Anthony?"

"I thought that it was only fair."

"But not Cullen." It wasn't a question.

Her head shot up.

"Really, Edward?"

I could hear the irritation in her voice so I decided to move on.

"When's his birthday?"

"April eleventh. He was two weeks late."

"Two weeks?"

"Yeah, and he was freaking huge," she laughed lightly.

"How big was he?" I remembered her saying something about pushing a nine pound baby out, but she could have been exaggerating.

"Nine pounds one ounce, twenty-two inches long."

"Holy Shit!" I breathed in deeply. She wasn't exaggerating. Even I knew that was a big fucking baby.

I looked over her tiny frame wondering how in the hell that had happened. She must have noticed my ogling.

"I was huge, too. I gained nearly sixty pounds."

I almost choked. Bella was one-twenty max. That was a fifty percent weight increase. She was smirking at me as I tried to picture a very pregnant Bella. The image in my head freaked me out a little, because what I saw was me with my hand on her firm round belly. I shuddered and shook my head trying to make the image go away.

"Look, Edward, I have to get Charlie to bed so . . ."

"Uh, yeah, that's fine. Sorry. I just thought . . . I just realized I didn't know," I stuttered a little.

"It's okay. You, you can ask me anything. I . . . I have pictures if you want to see them. I mean, only if you want."

I hesitated. Part of me wanted to see them, because . . . well, I guess because he was my kid. Fathers should be interested in that shit, right? Another part of me, the part that was still in denial, refused to acknowledge any desire to know anything about him. Yes, I was a fucking asshole, what's new?

She shifted on her feet and cleared her throat. "Don't worry about it, Edward. You don't have to. I thought I'd offer just in case, but it's not a big deal."

I just nodded. I didn't know what to say.

"Have a good night," she said as she climbed into her car and drove away.

I watched them leave for a moment before I turned to go back inside. I was in a bit of daze, not able to quite figure out what the fuck was going on with me.

"Everything okay, dear?" my mom asked softly as I re-entered the kitchen.

"Uh, yeah," I answered brilliantly. "I'm going to head to bed."

"Okay, goodnight."

"Night," I mumbled, climbing the stairs to my bedroom.

It was still fairly early, but it had been a long fucking day. I had the next two days off because Dr. Oleander had some conference he was going to in Seattle, and the clinic was running on nursing care only. Because I wasn't licensed, I wasn't allowed to work without his supervision. I was looking forward to some down time.

Meeting Charlie had not been what I had expected. I don't know exactly what I had expected, but that wasn't it. He wasn't like the little terrors you see in movies, or the nightmares in front of you at the grocery store checkout that are screaming for candy. He seemed a lot more laid back and reserved. He appeared to have his own little personality, his own thoughts, likes, and dislikes. I guess I never really realized that little kids had those.

I brushed my teeth, stripped naked, threw on a pair of pajama pants and climbed into bed. As I buried my face in the pillow, I realized that there was no way that I could make a decision without at least spending time around him. I mean, if I spent time around him and felt nothing then my answer was easy. A kid shouldn't be subjected to a father who doesn't want him, right? But what if I did feel something? At what level did Bella want me involved? At what level did I want to be involved?

I needed to talk to Bella. Not in the way that we did tonight, with everyone watching our every little movement, but just the two of us. I needed to know what she expected, what she wanted. I needed to know where I would fit in.

And with that final thought, I drifted off into sweet nothingness.

**XXXXXX**

**AN: So how was that? Edward's first little glimpse of who his son is. We're getting somewhere right? You can't expect him to just suddenly be father of the year, because that shit just wouldn't be realistic.**

**Next week: Both Edward and Bella have BIG decisions to make.**

**Rec:**

**Arranged Marriage by Shasta53: Set in modern day, Edward and Bella are forced into an arranged marriage when Bella is just 15 years old. Just as she turns eighteen she finds out some news that shatters her hopes for the future. This is pretty new, but I'm really liking it so far. In fact, I'm a little addicted to it already :o) I highly suggest taking a look.**


	12. Decisions Made

**AN: **

**A lot of you are questioning why Edward even has to consider being a part of Charlie's life and that's a valid question. Just think of it this way. When people find themselves facing an unexpected pregnancy, a lot of them weigh their options and there is almost always some form of fear and anxiety. That's exactly what Edward is feeling. The only difference is that the "pregnancy" is four years later and the child is already here.**

**Sorry to those of you who got my teaser with a typo. LOL. Luckily Twilight44 caught it for me and I was able to fix it, but not before many of you got it. Thank you my dear. I was cutting and pasting and apparently not paying attention.**

**Thank you Mel for being my supertastic pre-reader and for the stunning blinke. If you all haven't seen it, I highly recommend taking a look. You can go to http:/i858(dot)photobucket(dot)com/albums/ab147/melee1970/Blinkies/th_Animation6(dot)gif?t=1287368384 (replace the dots of course) or the link is on my profile page.**

**Thank you to Mollie for pre-reading, beta-ing, supporting, and just being F*cking amazing all around. I don't know what I'd do without you.**

**The characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. No Copyright infringement is intended.**

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 11: Decisions Made

BPOV

Edward Cullen was one frustrating man. As I drove home I was reeling. It's not like I expected him to become super-daddy overnight. After everything that had happened over the last few weeks, I didn't think that he would suddenly change directions and be this completely awesome guy who was thrilled about having a beautiful child to call his very own. But Jesus Christ, was it so difficult to interact with your kid for a couple of hours?

Apparently when you don't know a thing about him. . . yes. I was trying to be understanding and patient, but watching him was just downright painful.

His body language betrayed the warring emotions every time Charlie touched him. He didn't know what he was supposed to feel. I got it, I really did. Okay, maybe I didn't. The whole fucking situation was exasperating. I didn't know whether to discourage their interaction or support it. So I tried to stay neutral.

That's why I couldn't accept Esme's offer of the apartment; not right away. I really did want to move in there though. Especially after she'd taken me on a tour.

The main entrance was on the opposite side of the garage so that it was completely private. When I first walked in the front door, there was a little foyer that had hooks on the wall for coats and a wooden bench with cubbies below it for boot and shoe storage. The other side had a buffet type table with a lamp, a mail sorter and a place to hang your keys. Through an arched doorway and to the left was a decent sized living room with a leather sofa and loveseat with a wooden coffee table and a flat screen television. To the left of the living room were a laundry room and a powder room. To the right of the living room was a small formal dining room that opened up to a mini-gourmet kitchen complete with maple cabinets and granite countertops. At the back of the living room was a hallway that led to three bedrooms. The first was a smaller room, even though it was bigger than our room at my dad's house. Esme thought it would be perfect for Charlie and offered to help decorate it in any theme that he wanted. The second bedroom was a guest bedroom and the third was an amazing master bedroom with a private luxury bathroom. It had a jetted tub and a gorgeous view of the woods and river behind the house. There was a queen sized four poster bed that I probably could have lived in, and a separate lounging area with a loveseat, a television, a desk and bookcases full of books.

The whole place was fantastic and they probably could have rented it out for two grand a month, but they were offering it to me for free.

"_Esme, I'm sorry, but there's no way that I can afford this," I said quietly. _

_She scoffed. "I'm not expecting you to pay rent, sweetheart." _

"_Then there's absolutely no way that I can accept it," I laughed, very little trace of humor in my voice._

"_Please, Bella," she begged. "If you don't take it, it will continue to sit empty. There's no way that I'd ever allow strangers to live here. You and Charlie are family. We'd love to have you close to us."_

I knew that to be true. In all the time I had known them, they had never rented it out. It was used for guests and family. Not even the kids were allowed in there. Carlisle kept a tight hold on the key and no matter how much they searched, none of the Cullen kids could figure out his hiding spot.

During dinner I couldn't get the offer out of my head. I was watching Edward, careful to make sure that he didn't catch me. It was the first time he had really laid eyes on Charlie and I was curious as to what he thought. I couldn't imagine that it didn't have some sort of affect.

I almost lost it when he called Charlie '_little_'. The look on my boy's face was priceless. That was a new thing for him, to get angry when anyone called him '_little_'. Almost everyone in the Cullen family had already learned this, but since Edward had never been around Charlie, he didn't know any better.

And then he dropped the F-bomb and I had to choke back my laughter. Not because he did it, but because he looked like he's just swallowed a bug; a big one.

I knew that Esme was trying to be proper about not swearing in front of a child, but really, Charlie wasn't phased. He had certainly been around enough profanity between Riley, Jake, Dad and myself, that he knew all of the major words. In the beginning he used them indiscriminately, because he didn't know better, but as he got a little older I was constantly reminding him that those were _grown-up words_ and he wasn't to use them. He didn't even notice anymore.

I knew that Charlie would approach Edward at some point. Edward was a new person and my son was a curious boy. I could see Edward's fascination as he watched Charlie play the piano. It was the same fascination that we all had. Something flashed in his eyes at that moment and, for a moment, I let myself wonder if this would actually work. But seeing the fear and hesitancy in his eyes when Charlie hugged him, I pushed it back.

I knew that he wasn't afraid of Charlie, but he was afraid to let him in, to feel anything for him. I had to keep my emotions in check; return to neutral. I would not influence Edward's decision.

Esme was hopeful that her son could come around. I wasn't so sure.

As we made our way back to the kitchen to say goodnight, I tried to refocus. Unfortunately, I wasn't paying attention and when Edward stopped abruptly in front of me, I slammed into his back and lost my footing. It happened really quickly and suddenly there was a warm arm around my waist, holding me tightly. His large hand was on my hip and he pulled me into him. My instant reaction was what freaked me out. Warmth shot through my body, heating up places that it shouldn't have heated up. It turned me on and that wasn't supposed to happen. He wasn't allowed to affect me like that. Not anymore.

He didn't let go immediately and I had to remove myself before I did, or said, something inappropriate. I didn't understand the reaction. I hated Edward. Well, maybe not hated, but strongly disliked. He had called me every name in the book, accused me of being a horrible person. He was an asshole. But part of me remembered how attracted to him I had always been. The attraction that had led me to allow him to take me the night we….., well, the night he fucked me. I didn't know what else to call it. That's what happened.

When Edward asked me what Charlie's name was I thought he was joking. I mean, he had to have known. I was sure that someone had told him, but then I realized that _I_ never had. And then it became clear. He was trying to figure out if I had given Charlie the Cullen name.

Seriously? Why on God's green earth, if I had never planned on telling anyone, would I have named my child Cullen?

It was just my luck that Charlie would have to look so much like Edward that I was never able to deny it. Karma really was a motherfucking bitch. If Charlie had looked like me instead, I probably never would have told Alice that I had gotten pregnant by her brother and no one would have been any wiser. As long as no one did the math, they would believe that I got pregnant at college.

Fucked up, yes, but the truth nonetheless. The whole situation was a huge fucking nightmare. I loved that the Cullen's had embraced Charlie, and had been so kind to me even though I had stolen so much time from him, but Edward's reaction hurt.

As he stood in front of me, asking questions, I thought that I would take a chance and try to support any interest that he was showing. But then he completely froze when I offered him the pictures. I was so fucking confused.

XXXXXXXX

Charlie was asleep by the time we pulled into my dad's driveway. As I carried him up to our room he was mumbling something about Batman and a dinosaur.

_So much for a bath._

I stripped him out of his pants and underpants and slid on a pair of pajama bottoms. I could have tried to wrestle with his shirt, but decided against it. He was out like a light and I wanted to keep him that way. It was only nine and I wasn't quite ready to go to bed so I figured getting some work done was probably my best option. I was supposed to be writing the literature review for our study and that shit was hard. Luckily, Luke had given me several copies of his other studies so that I could see how it was done.

Work had been amazing. Luke was brilliant. He was friendly and funny and kind. He was also extremely hot. I only saw him a few hours every week, but I was pretty sure that my tongue was permanently hanging out of my mouth every time I came within five feet of him. He kind of made my pink parts tingle.

I was also fairly certain that there was something going on between him and his other assistant. Cammy was a Psychology grad student at UW, but she worked and took classes out of their satellite office in Port Angeles and also worked part-time as a bartender. When I first met her, it was very clear that she was staking her claim to the boss man. Every time I turned around, she had her hand on his body somewhere; his arm, his shoulder, his neck. And I didn't even want to know where her hands were whenever we sat down at a table.

Luke didn't outwardly react to her in either a positive or negative way. He never shied away from her touch, but he never encouraged or initiated it either. I didn't think I had a chance with Luke anyways, not that I was looking for one. Between Riley and Edward I had too many men to deal with in the first place, but a little flirting never did any harm, right?

After our first few meetings, Cammy stopped being so she-aggressive. She was never overly friendly and she didn't stop touching Luke, but she was no longer growling at me whenever I talked to him. I think it helped that Riley happened to call me once during one of our meetings. There was no denying the blush that crept across my face when he started trying to talk dirty. And I emphasize the "try" part of that. Riley was not very adept in the art of seduction and it was a little embarrassing.

In any case, Cammy knew that I had a kid and I think she assumed that we were one little happy family. I did not know the woman and I wasn't about to correct her. She was kind of scary.

I had three more weeks to complete my first draft of the literature review and I was looking forward to the actual research part of the study. I sat in front of my laptop in the kitchen, papers scattered around me, and began typing. When I looked up again, it was after midnight.

"Crap," I groaned.

The next day was Thursday, park day, and there was no chance that Charlie would be letting me sleep in. I dragged my ass back to my room, slipped into a pair of flannel pants and a t-shirt and climbed into bed, almost instantly falling into a deep sleep.

XXXXXX

I woke with a start, nearly falling out of bed. I was sweating and breathing heavy. I had dreamed that there were no apartments for rent in the area and I had to move to Seattle. I found one apartment for rent in the city and it was a rat and cockroach infested shit-hole in a really bad part of town. Every time we went outside, someone offered to buy Charlie from me. It freaked me the fuck out.

I knew that it was just a dream and that there were probably at least a few apartments that I would eventually be able to afford in both Forks and Port Angeles, but nevertheless, that dream was one more check on the '_maybe I should at least consider taking Esme's offer_' list.

When we got to the park, Esme and Carlisle were both there waiting already. They had decided to take the morning off so that they could come to the park with us. Carlisle approached me and handed me a large latte.

"Oh my God, thank you," I sighed.

"No problem," he grinned. "You okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. I was up late working last night and then didn't sleep well. Charlie was flipping out this morning about some truck that he absolutely couldn't go to the park without and I didn't have time to get any coffee at home so you're pretty much saving my life."

"That's what I do," Carlisle teased as he pointed towards his chest. "See, doctor."

I snorted and took a long drag from the paper cup. "You're a funny man, Carlisle."

I continued to sip on my coffee while watching Esme run around after Charlie. It was hysterical. Charlie was running circles around her.

"No wonder you're still so thin," she gasped as she returned to us. "I've been running after that child for half an hour and I'm exhausted."

She flopped herself down on the bench and put her hand on Carlisle's knee. "Your turn, darling," she grinned at him.

Carlisle handed his coffee to his wife, stood up, and ran at full speed towards Charlie who was squealing in delight from the other side of the play structure.

"I never realized grandchildren could be so fun," Esme murmured. She took a sip of Carlisle's now cold coffee and made a face. "Eww, that's disgusting." She laughed and threw it into the trashcan that was conveniently placed next to our bench. "So did you and Edward have a nice talk last night?" she asked curiously.

"Um, well, he asked me a few of the basics. I mean, we didn't really talk," I stumbled over my words a little. I knew that Esme was hoping that Edward and I would work things out and get along. If he decided to stick around, then I suppose I hoped the same thing. It would make things much easier in the long run, but I wasn't willing to get my hopes up. Edward's emotions were too unpredictable and I never knew when he would decide to get angry with me again.

"Well, I guess that's a start right?" She smiled at me.

I nodded appeasingly and continued watching Carlisle and Charlie. Carlisle was now pretending to be a dragon under the play structure's bridge and Charlie had to run across as fast as he could without waking the dragon up. His shrieks alerted everyone within a five-mile radius when he was unsuccessful.

Esme and I were chatting about absolutely nothing in particular when I saw her look past me. Her lips twitched a little into a small smile and I turned to see what she was looking at. I never expected to see what I saw.

Edward stood at the edge of the park leaning against a tree and sipping a coffee. His eyes were trained at his father and Charlie.

"How did he..."

"I told him this morning," Esme said looking almost guilty. "He asked where we were going and I explained about Thursday mornings. I honestly didn't think he'd show up though."

My mouth gaped a little at her before I turned back around so that I could see him without actually looking at him. He would randomly break out into a smile or laugh when Carlisle did something completely ridiculous for Charlie's entertainment, like hanging upside down from his knees. Can I just say, that a forty-three year old man has absolutely no business hanging upside down from monkey bars. It did make Charlie laugh so hard he fell backwards though. A few minutes later, Carlisle limped back to us with a grimace.

"How's it hanging, Gramps?" I teased.

Carlisle grabbed at his back and straightened himself up a little. "I'm getting too old for this," he groaned.

"I'm not sure that hanging upside down from those bars is a good idea once you weigh more than sixty pounds, dear," Esme scolded playfully.

"You couldn't have suggested that before I did it?" Carlisle sat down, resting his arm around Esme's back and kissing her temple.

"Now where would the fun be in that?" she laughed. "Besides, your grandson loved it."

Carlisle chuckled.

I was watching Charlie, who had decided to fill his coveted truck up with wood chips, but out of the corner of my eye I saw Carlisle nod towards Edward in silent question. Esme shook her head and shrugged.

"Hey, would you be willing to keep an eye on Charlie for me?"

"Sure, sweetheart," Esme smiled softly.

"I'll be right back okay, baby."

"Kay mama."

I stood up and walked towards where Edward was standing. He shifted his weight and looked at me nervously as I approached him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...uh..."

"It's fine, Edward." I sighed. "Do you want to come over or would you prefer to hover by the tree?"

I had a slightly teasing tone to my voice so that he knew that I wasn't upset.

Edward didn't answer right away. He looked towards his parents and then at Charlie.

"Um, can we talk for a minute?" he asked hesitantly.

I swallowed dryly wondering if this would be the moment that he told me he was out; that he wanted nothing to do with Charlie and he would sign the papers.

Was that truly what I wanted?

"Yeah, of course."

Edward shifted again. I tried to look him in the eyes to gauge what he was thinking, but it was pointless, he wouldn't look at me.

"Edward?"

"Oh, uh, I, I just...," he huffed air out through his nose in a frustrated gesture. "Shit!"

"Just...tell me," I said as I braced myself for what was coming.

"I don't know what you want from me, Bella," he sighed.

"I don't want anything from you," I snapped.

_Are we really going to do this again?_

"That's not what I mean," he groaned. "I mean, say that I want to do this, this father thing. What, um, what does that entail?"

I stared at him with a look of utter disbelief and then cleared my throat.

"I guess I don't really understand what you're asking me. Are you asking me, uh, what exactly _are_ you asking me?"

"I don't know how to do this," he said nervously, his eyes darting around all over the place. "I don't know what you expect from me. Will this be like a whole, I get him on weekends thing or... well I don't know what else there is, but I just need to know."

I narrowed my eyes at him in confusion, my mouth slightly ajar.

"Jesus, Bella," he huffed, pinching the bridge of his nose with his non-coffeed hand. I watched him bounce slightly and grit his teeth.

_Is this really that fucking hard for him?_

I took a deep breath. "I don't know how to answer that. I just don't want him to get hurt. If you're going to be his father, be his father. Talk to him, play with him and _love_ him. There's no manual for kids, Edward. There's no guidebook that says '_This is how to be a parent_'. I expect you to be consistent. You can't promise him you'll show up one day and just fuck off instead. There is no '_something else came up_' with kids. If he's going to be in your life, then he needs to be your top priority."

"That's a lot of fucking responsibility," he whispered almost to himself.

"No shit?"

He glared at me. "I'm trying, Bella, okay? You've had years to figure this shit out so stop with the fucking sarcasm already. I didn't have nine months to get ready for this and I wasn't given the opportunity to ease into the idea of having a kid. I've had four fucking weeks. And in that time, I've been told that I have a three-year-old, assaulted both physically and verbally by my family because I didn't react the way they wanted me to, and told that I have fourteen days to make a decision that will affect the rest of my life. Could you at least cut me a some fucking slack?"

I gritted my teeth and bit back the acidic remark that was dancing on the tip of my tongue. Mostly because ripping Edward a new asshole with my son standing fifty feet away, might be considered child abuse. Plus, he was right. I wasn't being fair. I was the reason he was inexperienced. I was the reason he was completely clueless.

I let the silence between us sit for a minute until we both had calmed down.

"I'm sorry," Edward said shaking his head. "This is just..."

"It's okay. You're right. You're here, and that's a big step, especially for you, but 'trying' is more than just standing by a tree watching him play. Go talk to him. He's a good kid. If you're dad can hang upside down for him, the least you could do is help him fill up his truck."

Edward barked out a laugh and I couldn't help but smile, glad that the tension seemed to be dissipating. I looked back at Carlisle and Esme and saw their heads whip around to pretend like they weren't watching us.

"Are we ever going to be able to have a conversation without an audience?" I groaned.

"Doubt it," he snorted.

I turned back around and looked back over my shoulder at him. "Are you coming?"

He looked over at Charlie again. "Yeah."

As we got closer to the bench where Esme and Carlisle were sitting, they both looked up at us.

"Hi, sweetheart," Esme cooed.

"Hey, Ma."

"Hi, Eward," Charlie chirped from his spot in the mulch.

"Hey, Charlie," Edward responded looking at me with wide eyes. I knew what he was asking. _"What the hell do I do?"_

"Do you want to show Edward how much wood your truck can carry?" I asked my son enthusiastically.

He nodded almost violently with an excited little grin plastered from ear to ear.

Edward didn't move.

"Go. Sit. With. Him." I mouthed.

Esme nodded at him in encouragement and he took a deep breath before heading over to Charlie and bending down next to him.

"So, what are we doing?" he asked.

"Putting the sticks in the truck," Charlie answered with a hint of '_well duh_' to his tone.

I snickered under my breath and Edward frowned at me.

"He really is a lot like you," he grumbled.

I burst out laughing. "I'll take that as a compliment."

I saw him try to hide his smile as he returned his attention to Charlie.

Twenty minutes later we were kissing our goodbyes and making our way home for lunch. Not Edward and me, of course, but the rest of us.

Edward had done well in comparison to what I had expected. He said very little as he helped Charlie dump out and refill his truck with mulch at least a dozen times, but he did listen. Charlie talked... a lot. Edward 'hmm'd', 'huh'd', and 'oh really'd' in all the right places. His facial expressions were what fascinated me the most. They spoke of so many emotions, several of which I wasn't sure I recognized.

When we were leaving, he taught Charlie how to fist bump. I briefly wondered if he did that so that he wouldn't have to hug him, but no sooner had the thought passed through my head, that Charlie, once again, wrapped himself around Edward's leg. Edward stiffened slightly and then relaxed as he rested his hand on Charlie's back and returned the squeeze.

Unfortunately, I still didn't trust him. Until the moment he told me that he was all in, until he showed me that this was what he wanted, I wouldn't let myself hope, because with hope, came heartbreak.

XXXXXXX

Jake was waiting for us as we pulled up at the house. I had barely pressed the button on Charlie's five point when the little sucker was ripping off his shoulder straps and bounding towards Jake.

"Hello, my man," Jake said, scooping him up and giving him a gigantic bear hug.

"Hi, Uncle Jake," Charlie squeaked. " Did you know what I did today?"

"What did you do?" Jake asked.

"I went to park with Gramma and Papa and I went all the way across the monkey bars all by myself!" he beamed.

"You did?" Jake asked animatedly. "Wow, you must be one super strong dude."

"Uh, huh, you wanna see my musckoes?" Charlie asked, as he bent his elbow in an attempt to flex his bicep.

Jake played along. "Oh my gosh, you are so strong. You wanna arm wrestle later?"

Charlie nodded his head enthusiastically.

"And Papa went upside down and Eward helped me fill my truck."

Jake's eyebrows shot up so fast that they practically disappeared from his face.

"I'll tell you later," I placated.

Jake kissed me on the cheek as I approached them and followed me into the house.

He set Charlie down in the foyer and watched him disappear into the living room. We heard the television come on and the tell tale sounds of Spongebob Squarepants come on.

"Seriously, that show is always on," I grumbled as I pulled out some bread and peanut butter out of the cabinet. Jake grabbed a coke out of the fridge before sitting down at the table.

"I'm really not sure how I feel about a talking yellow sponge that wears pants and lives in a pineapple," I said, shaking my head. "That can't be educational, can it?"

Jake started chuckling. "I don't know, Bells, I'm just the uncle. It's my job to let him watch pointless un-educational shit on TV and eat junk food."

I turned around and stared at him before tossing a Duplo block at his head.

"Ow. Shit, Bella," he groaned as he rubbed his head just above his ear.

"That didn't hurt, you big baby. You want a PB & J?"

"Sure."

I pulled out the extra bread and started to make our lunch while Jake sipped lazily on his Coke.

"So how are things going with your baby daddy?"

"Ugh, don't ask."

"What's the matter? Is he still refusing to believe it?"

"No, he gets it. It's just that last night was the first time he even actually looked at him."

"He found out three weeks ago and he didn't even try to see him? What a fucking douche."

I laughed. "He couldn't avoid it last night. We were over there for dinner. He even talked to him," I said in a high falsely excited voice.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I guess I misjudged him." Jake rolled his eyes.

"He asked me some questions as we were getting ready to leave and I thought I'd offer a few pictures of Charlie when he was a baby. It freaked him out. He was at the park today too."

"Yeah, I heard that. What'd he say?"

I smirked a little. "Well, at first he was skulking by a tree."

"Eww, like a pervert?"

I nodded. "If I hadn't known who he was, I would have been a little creeped out by the fact that he was watching my kid."

"And?"

"He's scared, Jake. He doesn't know if this is what he wants. He played with Charlie for a few minutes today, but I honestly don't know what his decision will be."

"It doesn't really matter what he wants does it? I mean, Charlie's his kid whether he likes it or not, right? He's not going to be able to forget that."

"He may try."

"I'm sorry, Bells."

"What are you sorry for, it's not your fault."

"I know, but your situation sucks and I can't really do anything to help."

"Yeah, well, I made my own bed, it's time to sleep in it. Next time I get knocked up I need to make sure the father's a little bit less of an asshole," I teased.

"Oh my God, Bella, don't even joke about that shit."

I finished up the sandwiches and pulled out a bowl of grapes from the fridge.

"Come on, Jake. I need to be able to joke about it so that I don't break down. Besides, at my six-week check-up after Charlie was born, I had them put in an IUD. My baby maker is currently out of commission."

"Good to know," he said, grimacing.

I laughed and handed him his plate.

"Charlie, come on in here and eat lunch," I called loudly.

"Does Charlie know?" Jake asked, taking a huge bite of his sandwich.

"No. I don't think it's a good idea right now. I told Edward that if he decided not to take responsibility, I'd like him to terminate his parental rights."

Jake choked and started coughing loudly. "You did what?" he practically screeched.

"He'd sign full custody over to me. I don't want to have to worry about him coming in and out of Charlie's life. I'd rather Charlie just not know."

"How did he respond to that?"

"Not well."

"I can imagine."

At that moment Charlie wandered into the kitchen and sat down at the table, ending all talk of Edward.

Jake stayed for another two hours before heading to work. Charlie took a short nap and I got a couple of hours of work done.

XXXX

Later that night, my dad was sitting next to Charlie in the living room explaining the finer points of the Mariners game that was on while I was cleaning up after dinner. I heard my phone buzz on the countertop and picked it up.

"Hey, baby," Riley cooed from the other end.

"Hi."

"Whatcha doin?"

I snorted. "Dishes."

Riley laughed. "Exciting."

"What are _you_ doing?"

"Just checkin in on you. I haven't heard from you in a few days. I was getting a little worried."

"Sorry, things have been a little crazy."

"Ah, did he get the results?" Riley asked curiously.

"Yes."

"And?"

"And what? He got proof that I wasn't the lying bitch he accused me of being."

"I should rip that fucker a new one. Who the hell does he think he is?"

I rolled my eyes and shook my head, thankful that Riley couldn't see me. "It doesn't matter, Ri."

"It does matter. Did you rub that shit in his face?"

"Yeah, cause we don't have enough animosity and anger to work through already," I said sarcastically.

Riley didn't respond right away, but instead let the line go quiet for a minute.

"So, um, he's going to stick around?" There was something in Riley's voice that made me a little uneasy.

"I don't know," I sighed. "We went over there for dinner last night and he showed up at the park this morning. He appears to be trying, but I don't think he knows what he wants right now."

"I just don't get it," he growled. "I mean, I get that the dude is pissed off that you didn't tell him, but Jesus Christ Bella. It's Charlie for God's sakes. It's not like he's a hard kid to love."

"I don't think that's the issue," I said.

"Then what's the fucking issue?"

"I think it's me." I lowered my voice so that Dad and Charlie couldn't accidentally hear me. "He never meant for that night to happen, Riley. The only reason he ended up with me in the first place was because he was drunk and horny and his girlfriend probably pissed him off. I was there and I was someone he hadn't already fucked. He never really wanted me like that and I don't think he wants to look at Charlie and be reminded of who his mother is."

It hurt saying that out loud. It had been in my mind forever, but actually admitting it made it so much more painful.

"That's such bullshit Bella," Riley snapped."There is no possible way that he didn't look at you and know exactly what he was doing and what he wanted. You never did see yourself clearly. I have no idea why he didn't snatch you up long before then, but drunk or not, I can guarantee that he took you because he wanted you."

I sat there, with my cell clutched to my ear and my jaw dragging on the floor. Edward had never even looked at me other than to make fun of me. He bragged about the girls and what they wanted from him and what he could do to them. Why would he do that to me if he wanted me? He had to have known how disgusted I was by it all. No, he never wanted me. He said it himself, it was a mistake. _I _was a mistake.

"Whatever, Ri. It doesn't change anything."

"Hey," he soothed. "I didn't mean anything by it. All I'm saying is that you and Charlie both deserve better than to be made an obligation."

I felt the tears pushing at the back of my eyeballs. I needed to stop this conversation.

"I miss you," I whispered.

"Yeah, I miss you too," Riley responded. I could hear the smile in his voice. "So when am I gonna see you?"

_Hmm, that's a good question._

"I don't know, Ri. I'm not sure I can get up to Seattle for a couple of weeks."

"Why don't I come down there?"

"I, uh, I'm not so sure that's a good idea right now."

"Why not?" He asked, sounding a little hurt.

"I, um, I...things are just complicated right now."

The line was silent for what seemed like forever, but I could hear Riley breathing so I knew he hadn't hung up.

"Um, so you think that I'll just make it worse?"

I sighed deeply. "It's not that, Ri. I just need to sort a few things out."

"Do they know about me?"

There was an edge to his voice that told me he was upset and getting frustrated.

"Of course they do," I reassured.

"All of them?"

_Oh, I see._

_"_Are you asking me if Edward knows about you?"

"No, I'm asking you if Edwards knows about _us_."

"Are you serious?" I laughed humorlessly. "Edward and I can barely have a conversation without screaming at each other. You have no reason to be jealous."

"I'm not jealous," he growled.

"Yes, you are," I whisper yelled.

"You never answered my question."

"Yes, Riley he..." But I had to stop. Because the truth was, I had never told Edward about my situation with Riley and I didn't know if anyone else had either. "Shit."

I heard Riley sigh. "He doesn't, does he?"

"Crap, I don't know. It's not like we've actually had a conversation that didn't center around Charlie or how he came about."

"Fuck, Bella, you don't think that I deserve at least an honorable mention?"

"I didn't do it on purpose."

"Bella, you okay in there?" my dad called out. Apparently my voice had steadily been rising and was now disturbing the rest of my family.

"Yeah, Dad. Sorry, I'm on the phone."

"Look, Riley, it never came up. I'm sorry."

"I want to come over."

"Arg," I groaned.

"It doesn't have to be tonight, or tomorrow, but Jesus Bella it needs to be soon."

I swallowed my irritation. I knew what he wanted. He wanted to present himself to the Cullen's as my boyfriend. He wanted to stake his claim on me.

But the problem with that was that I wasn't his to claim. I loved Riley, but I would never be _in_ love with him. I couldn't give him that part of me. I didn't even know if that part of me existed. There was one person and one person only that held my heart. My son.

"Please just give me a little bit of time. Edward needs to make his decision and I don't want anything, other than Charlie, to influence that."

Riley huffed. "How long does he have?"

"Eleven days."

"Fine. Eleven days."

That was pretty much the end of our conversation. We were both annoyed and we knew that if we didn't end it there, we would end up fighting. I was so tired of fighting. I hung up, poured myself a glass of wine and joined Dad and Charlie for a few more innings.

XXXXX

The next morning my phone chimed with a text message as I was helping Charlie get dressed. When I was finished, I sent him on his way down the stairs and picked up my phone.

_Edward._

I flipped open my phone and read the message.

**Hey. Do you think it would be possible to do something this weekend? With Charlie? ~Edward~**

I stared at the text trying to figure out if I was reading it wrong before sending one back.

**You want to do something with Charlie? ~Bella~**

**Yeah. ~Edward~**

_Really?_

**By yourself? ~Bella~**

That was so not happening. There was no way I could trust Edward to take Charlie anywhere by himself. Shit, I didn't even trust him to be alone with Charlie at their house.

**No. ~Edward~**

Thank God.

**Maybe you can be there? To help me? ~Edward~**

I had to laugh. Even his text message sounded nervous.

**Plus, I'm tired of my family constantly watching me. Us. ~Edward~**

I knew how he felt. I was done having this conversation through text though. I dialed his number.

"Hello?"

**"**What are you thinking?"

"I'm sorry, I just thought maybe it would be good?"

_He thinks I'm saying no._

"No, sorry, I meant what do you want to do?"

"Oh. Uh, good. I don't know. What, uh, what do you think?"

"You free today?"

"Yeah."

"I'll pick you up at ten."

I didn't give him the chance to say anything else.

XXXXX

Edward stared up at the sign in confusion. "I don't get it."

I smiled widely. "What don't you get?"

"What is this place?"

"This is one of Charlie's favorite places."

"Yeah, but what is it?"

I giggled and opened the door.

"Shit!" he gasped.

Charlie bounced around us like he had springs in his feet. As I signed him in and pulled out my punch card, Charlie ditched his shoes and took off running.

Edward gaped. "Wow."

"I know, right? Come on." I grabbed Edward's bicep unconsciously and we both kind of froze. I bit my lip and swallowed. "Sorry."

"S'okay," he mumbled.

He motioned for me to go in front of him and I led him to the seating area. I sat down in one of the overstuffed leather chairs and Edward sat next to me on the sofa. He scratched his arm where I had touched him nervously and his sleeve was pushed up so that I could see the bottom of his tattoo peaking out. It looked like some sort of Celtic design, but I had no idea what is was. The muscles of his arm were perfect; strong and rounded. They had been nice in high school, but he had obviously been working out since then.

I continued to stare hard at his arm, as though I would magically be able to see through his shirt if I tried hard enough. The thought made me flush and I had to blow out a bit of air to refocus myself. His voice startled me out of my reverie.

"This is something else," he said, his eyes darting around the giant warehouse.

"Charlie has a lot of energy; this is my saving grace sometimes."

We watched as Charlie launched himself into one of the more basic bouncies. There were a few kids that had joined him and before we knew it, the little joyful giggling that accompanies happy children was completely surrounding us as they raced from inflatable to colorful inflatable.

"It's so easy for them to make friends at that age," I said almost longingly. "None of the bullshit of looking for what they gain from the friendship. Just plain old enjoyment."

Edward looked over at me, scanning my face as though he was looking for something.

"What?"

He furrowed his brow and looked away. "Nothing."

We continued to watch in silence, but Edward was almost vibrating. I could tell he wanted to say something, but I wasn't going to coax it out of him. He was a big boy and if he had something to say, he'd just have to spit it out when he was ready.

He sighed loudly, followed shortly by a huff and then he cleared his throat. I pretended to rub my cheek so that I could hide my smile. I was getting some sick form of entertainment out of watching him squirm. Finally he figured out I wasn't going to give in.

"Has he always had this much energy?"

I nodded. "Yeah, from the day he was born he was constantly wiggling and moving. He slept pretty well, but when he was awake, he was _really_ awake."

"Is he normal?"

I whipped my head around and narrowed my eyes. "What do you mean '_is he normal_?' Of course he's normal."

_What the fuck kind of question is that?_

Edward grimaced. "That's not what I meant. Uh, he just seems so good. Normally when I see kids they're screaming and whining or crying."

"Ha," I scoffed a little. "Don't let him fool you, Edward. He can throw a temper tantrum with the best of them when he really wants to. When we were in Seattle he went through a biting phase, a hitting phase, a pinching phase and a pulling hair phase. And sometimes they overlapped."

"Jesus."

"Yeah, well, they learn that kind of shit in daycare and there's nothing I could really do about it. But he also learned pretty quickly that I don't tolerate it. Doesn't mean he still doesn't do it sometimes, but since we've come back to Forks and he's not around it every day it's much less frequent."

"How, uh, how did he learn?"

"I don't spank if that's what you're asking. I don't see the point in teaching a child not to hit by hitting them. But I knew parents who did and it seemed to work for them so, whatever. It's just not what I do. When he was really little all I had to do was scold him and he'd cry. Now he goes into time out in the corner. He hates it. When he throws a temper tantrum I completely ignore him."

"And that works?" He asked, looking like he didn't believe me.

"Sometimes. If he's really inconsolable I sit with him and hold him tightly until he calms down, then we talk about it."

"How do you talk about that kind of stuff to a three-year-old?"

"They're a lot more cognitively aware than you think. I've never talked to him like a baby. I explain things in his terms. I repeat myself a lot and I'm consistent."

"How'd you figure out how to do that?"

"Trial and error," I laughed. "Watching what other people did and seeing if it worked for us. Supernanny."

Edward turned his head away from watching Charlie to look at me. "What the hell is Supernanny?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

I giggled and nodded. "She's this fabulous British woman on TV who goes into people's homes and straightens them and their kids out. You should see some of the out of control kids that are on there. And the parents can be just as bad. She's got some good tips."

"Huh," Edward said returning his attention to the gaggle of children who were now dive bombing down a giant slide. "When did he start playing the piano?"

I smiled. I knew that Charlie's new obsession would grab Edward's attention.

"The day that I first brought him over to meet Alice and Jasper."

"Really?" he asked looking at me again.

"Yup."

"He's probably ready for lessons then."

I coughed a little, but said nothing. As much as I would love to put Charlie in lessons, extracurricular activities were kind of on hold until I could get myself together.

Edward's knee was bouncing and he was wringing his hands in his lap. "Has he always looked like me?"

"No. Not always. When he was a tiny baby no one could tell. I could see a few things. He's always had your eyes, even when they were blue; they were still the same shape. But no one else knew that you were the father so they weren't looking for things like that."

"His eyes were blue?"

"Most babies are born with blue eyes, Edward. They change around six to nine months."

"Oh, yeah, I think I knew that."

"Somewhere around ten or eleven months, there was this shift. He went through a growth spurt and all of the sudden he looked like you. Like, the spitting image of you."

"That must have been weird," he murmured.

"It was more panic inducing," I admitted, avoiding his gaze. "I knew I wasn't going to be able to hide it anymore. Not from the people who knew you. Even my dad saw it almost immediately."

"I bet that was fun. He probably wanted to kill me."

I chuckled. "Yes, yes he did. I should probably tell you though. Uh, that hasn't changed."

"What?" he sort of yelped.

"You might just want to avoid provoking my dad any time soon, cause he's just looking for an excuse."

"An excuse for what?" Edward's voice was a slight octave higher than normal and I smirked at him.

"An excuse to beat the shit out of you."

"Oh," he gulped. "Good to know."

Seconds later, Charlie came flying out of nowhere and into Edward's lap. Edward startled, but instinctually put his hands on Charlie's waist.

"Come ooooooon, Eward," Charlie whined, grabbing onto Edward's hands and pulling on his fingers.

Edward looked over at me. I shrugged. This was all him.

"Aren't I too big?"

I laughed and shook my head. "No, those things can hold a few hundred pounds. Just don't go bouncing as hard as you possibly can and I'm fairly certain you'll be fine. But you have to take off your shoes."

Charlie was still tugging on Edward and he finally gave in, standing up and slipping off his shoes.

I watched as the man who had done nothing but make my life a living hell for the past month, joined my son in a jungle themes bouncy castle. I watched as Edward tried to gain his balance, falling over twice before Charlie tackled him and assaulted him with giggles. I watched as my son's tiny hands grabbed on to his father's much larger ones in an attempt to help him gain his balance. I watched as Edward slowly gave in to the amusement that could only be produced by watching a child's delight. They ran, they chased, they tackled, they fist bumped and they laughed.

My chest ached at the sight. It felt like heartburn. It wasn't pleasant. Is this what I wanted? For them to bond? Yes...no. Charlie was getting attached. What would happen if Edward still decided to leave?

Edward grabbed Charlie around the waist and threw him into a bouncy before returning to me. He flopped down into the corner of the sofa with a grin on his face.

"That's just as much fun as it looks," he laughed. "Do you ever get in there with him?"

"More often than not, yes. It's nice to have someone else to do it though. Those kids can be brutal."

I bit my lip and smiled. "We should probably head out and get some lunch. Are you ready or do you want to play some more?" I teased.

"Funny," he said, rolling his eyes. "How do you go about getting him out?"

I smirked. "Hey Charlie, Pizza Playground?"

It took all of three seconds for Charlie to appear at my side. Pizza Playground was a pizza parlor attached to a playground. Kind of like the McDonald's play places, but better because it was family owned and the pizza was made with all natural ingredients.

"Haven't you had enough?" Edward laughed.

Charlie shook his head as he tried to put on his shoes.

"He's got them on the wrong feet," Edward whispered to me as we were walking out the door.

"Yep, he sure does."

XXXXXX

"Please, Mama, please, please, Mama. Mommy Please."

"One more bite and you can go."

Charlie grabbed his pizza and tore a bit off. He chewed quickly and opened his mouth before he had swallowed. "Now?"

I tilted my head, "That was gross Charlie. Go." And then I returned my attention to my own slice of whole wheat, cheesy heaven.

Charlie had been gone for less than a minute before Edward spoke up. "Iwannadoit."

I lifted my eyes without moving any other part of my body. My lunch was halfway to my mouth, but it was quickly forgotten. "Huh?"

"I, uh, I want to, I mean, I'd like to...I don't need two weeks."

"Really?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I do."

"Uh, are you absolutely sure?" I still couldn't believe what I was hearing. Did the man honestly just tell me he was ready for this?

"I said that I want to do it, Bella."

"Oooookay."

"I know you don't want anything from me Bella. I know you expect the worst and I deserve that, I know that I do, but I can't just walk away. I don't think I ever could have even if I had wanted to." Edward was speaking quietly, but for once he was looking directly into my eye.

"That doesn't make any sense."

He raked his hand over his face. "I want to try. If you'll let me."

I nodded and looked over at Charlie who was beginning to move a little bit slower. A sure sign that my boy was getting tired.

"Of course I'll let you, Edward."

XXXXXX

We packed up and headed back to Forks. Charlie fell asleep in the car almost immediately. For the first twenty minutes Edward and I sat in companionable silence with only the sounds of Alt Nation playing, but once again, I could tell he wanted to say something.

"I know my parents want you to move in, Bella," he blurted out suddenly.

I didn't move, I didn't speak. I just continued to look at the road ahead of me.

"Maybe it's not such a bad idea? I mean, it will get you out of your dad's place right?"

_Who in the hell is talking to me?_

"Mom said that you are both packed into one room. The apartment has a lot more space. And...that play set monstrosity is there."

I snorted. I couldn't help it. He was just verbalizing what I'd thought about that thing all along.

"Are you going to say anything?"

I glanced over at him quickly and saw that he was looking at me.

"I'm thinking," I admitted.

"What are you thinking about?"

"I'm having a hard time processing all of this Edward. Three weeks ago you were screaming at me and calling me names and accusing me of being after your money. Then, you didn't talk to me for two weeks. Now, you're telling me that you want to be a part of Charlie's life and want us to move in with you."

"Not with me," he rushed to clarify.

"Fine, into the apartment on your property."

"On my parent's property."

"Semantics, Edward. I...I just need to think about it okay."

"Right."

But the fact of the matter was that my mind was already making itself up. Edward had made his decision and so far, he was showing me that he wanted to do this. Being close by would force the realities of parenthood on him far faster than living across town ever could. I didn't know when it would happen, but I was fairly certain that by the end of the month, I would be living under the same roof as Edward Cullen.

Shit!

**XXXXXX**

**AN: So there you have it. Two decisions made.**

**Edward shows a little bit more of his softer side here. You all knew he wouldn't be able to resist Charlie so don't even act surprised. LOL. Don't get too comfortable though. Again, he doesn't instantly become the perfect father. And he hasn't lost his bark. And Bella, well she's trying to tone down the bitchyness and is finally starting to see the damage that she may have caused by cutting Edward out. She'll get there.**

**If you are questioning Riley's reaction...you should be. Me thinks that he and Bella have a whole different idea of what their 'arrangement' entails.**

**And, of course, we find out that Luke's other assistant is Cammy (the girl Edward had the one night stand with after he found out about Charlie). LOL. I laughed myself silly over that one.**

**Hitting 1000 this weeks seems like a stretch, but let's see how close we can get it. ;-)**

**Next week: Edward gets more test results and Bella gets pushed too far .**

**Rec:**

**A Thousand Leaves by BellaSunshine: Bella and Alice are best friends who spend every moment together during the summers when Bella visits her dad. Despite Bella being an 'honorary Cullen' Edward teases her mercilessly and once she moves to Forks at the age of sixteen, he is downright mean to her. Fast forward a few years and Edward is found at the murder scene of Bella's mother and is sentenced to life in prison. All of the evidence points to him, but he swears he didn't do it.**

**This one hit me hard. It is wonderfully written and just so heartbreaking. I can't wait to see how it unfolds.**


	13. Silent Truce

**AN: ****Thank you for everyone who reviewed. I made it to over a thousand total reviews this week. Woohoo. Every single review means so much to me.**

**If you got a confusing PM or review reply from me, I apologize. I was getting similar pen names mixed up and only realized it after I sent them away.**

**Thank you to Paige, Mel, and Mollie, for pre-reading and beta-ing. I love you guys.**

**Check out the answers to the Q & A on the Twilighted thread or on my blog at (littlecat358 . blogspot . com) both links are on my profile. **

**There is a little bit of lemon zest in this chapter. You have been warned. ****It's preceeded and followed by (***)**This story is rated M for a reason, I just ask that you abide by those guidelines.

**There's also some redundancy in this chapter, but I thought it was important to see the two days from Edward's eyes. **

**The characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended.**

**XXXXX**

**Chapter 12: Silent Truce**

**EPOV**

Why is it that whenever you have a day off, you're never able to sleep in? I awoke on Thursday morning as the sun was rising. I tugged my pillow over my head in hopes that I could fall back asleep, but shortly after my body woke, my brain followed and the two of them decided to mutiny against the rest of me. I groaned and rolled out of my nice warm bed.

I wasn't surprised to find my mother sitting in her usual place at the kitchen island with a cup of coffee and the newspaper. It didn't appear that she had been awake too long though. She was wearing a pair of cotton pajama pants and a plain light blue t-shirt. Her hair was pulled back into a low ponytail and she wasn't wearing any make-up. She looked so much younger like this. Not that she ever appeared old to begin with, but something about her natural state screamed beauty, radiance, and youth.

"Why hello there sweetheart. What are you doing up?" she asked warmly.

"Good question," I mumbled. "Couldn't sleep."

I noticed that she didn't appear to have made anything for breakfast. "Do you want me to make you something to eat?" I asked as I poured myself a cup of coffee.

She looked at me curiously for a moment before answering. "Sure."

I peered into the fridge. "Omelet okay?"

"Of course," she smiled. "But could you use the egg whites?" I nodded and grabbed the eggs, egg whites, a tomato, onion, a handful of spinach leaves and the cheese.

"What about Dad?"

"I'm sure he'd appreciate one as well, thank you dear. But make his with the egg whites too. He needs to start watching his cholesterol," she stage whispered.

"I heard that," Carlisle growled playfully as he entered the room, kissing my mom before coming to retrieve his coffee from the pot.

He cuffed me on the back firmly. "What are you doing up?"

I opened my mouth, but my mom answered for me. "He couldn't sleep," she winked at me.

"That's unfortunate, don't you have the day off?"

"Yes."

Carlisle chuckled and sat down next to my mom. As I made the omelets I could see them out of the corner of my eye. Carlisle whispered something in Mom's ear and she giggled like a little girl before slapping his chest with the back of her hand. I set their plates down in front of them and went back to make my own omelet. I ate at the counter, standing up and watching as my mother handed Carlisle the sections of the newspaper that she had already read. I smiled to myself at their affections and stuffed another bite of egg in my mouth.

"Are we all set for this morning?" Mom asked Carlisle.

"Yup, George is going to cover for me until lunch. Is Alice okay to handle everything?"

"Yes, she's fine. She's handling a call regarding the Jackson account at ten, but otherwise there are no meetings scheduled until this afternoon."

"Where are you guys going?" I asked curiously. If they were both taking the morning off, it must have been important.

"Oh, well, Bella takes Charlie to Tillicum Park every Thursday from nine to eleven. We're going to meet her over there to visit and play." My mom smiled at me and I couldn't help thinking that there was a hidden meaning behind it.

I didn't say anything else. I shoved the last bit of egg into my mouth, took a big swig of my coffee and put the dishes in the dishwasher. Just as I was headed upstairs I heard my mom.

"Thank you for breakfast Edward."

I lifted my hand in response and made my way upstairs to take a shower. The entire time, Bella and Charlie were on my mind. Fuck, it felt like most of the last month, they were on my mind. I wondered if she would be upset if I just showed up at the park. I had the whole day with nothing planned. Hadn't I just told myself that I needed to spend more time with Charlie if I wanted to make this decision the right way? Carlisle's words rang through my head. _"It may not be what you wanted, but would you really be able to live with yourself knowing you gave up on your own son?"_

"I guess I know what I'm doing today," I mumbled as I stepped out of the shower.

By the time I got back downstairs my parents had already left. The house was completely silent so I assumed that everyone else had left too.

I decided to get myself a coffee and stepped into the coffee shop.

XXXXX

"Hey, Man. How are you?" a vaguely familiar voice shouted as I got to the counter. I looked up and saw Tyler Crowley standing at the till.

"Hey," I smiled. "Not bad, what's new with you?"

"Summer job," he shrugged. "I'm down at the University of Oregon, but I've got 18 credits left before I can graduate. I'm heading back in a couple of weeks."

"Nice. We should go out for a drink before you have to leave."

"Definitely man. Your mom and pops were just in here. They got three coffees."

"Yeah, they're heading to the park, probably got one for Bella," I explained without really thinking.

Tyler's face registered shock and then went blank. He began fidgeting and his eyes were darting all around.

"Uuuuuhh, what can I get for you?" he asked nervously.

"Regular Latte to go is fine. Hey Tyler, can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"When you found that Bella had my kid what did you think?"

Tyler's mouth flopped open. "Uh, uh, uh..."

"I mean, did you think that I skipped out on her or did you know that she never fucking told me?"

I knew I was being a dick, but I really needed to know what the people of Forks had heard and what they thought. I had gone to school with these kids. I was their golden boy; the absolute king of this whole fucking town...at least for a few short years. It shouldn't have mattered. I had outgrown that shit. But it did matter.

Were they looking at me now and seeing a man who was lied to and cheated? Or were they seeing a monster who corrupted and ruined a young girl before abandoning her?

"I...it never really came up," he stuttered as he rang me up and took the cash that I was offering.

"Bullshit! This is a small fucking town and people talk. I want to know what they said."

A few heads turned my way as my voice started to rise.

"Dude, Bella never said anything, so none of us really knew. She didn't hang out with us once she had him. We just saw her around town."

I raised my eyebrows to urge him to continue.

"There were rumors. Everyone talked about how much he looked like you, but no one could remember you bragging about hitting that."

"That's cause I didn't."

Tyler looked up from making my coffee and snorted. I shook my head.

"I never bragged about it. It wasn't like that."

"Nothing special huh? That's not what Newton said, but he didn't have nearly the kind of bump you did."

I felt the growl rumbling low in my chest and had to hold it back.

"That fucker never touched her."

Tyler looked surprised. "Yeah he did; Junior year."

"I'm telling you, he never fucking touched her. I can guarantee it."

I didn't want to go there. I didn't want to tell him how I knew that Newton was a motherfucking liar, but I would. Not because I wanted to claim that title, but because I didn't want him to. Luckily Tyler didn't push it. He handed me my coffee.

"Well, whatever. In any case man, no one really said one way or another whether you knew. Some thought you did, some thought you didn't."

"And no one thought to fucking ask me or tell me?"

"Dude, by the time anyone even suspected that he was yours, we had all lost touch. It was none of our fucking business anyway. And besides, that was also the summer Tanya came home and announced you were getting married. She saw him, we figured she'd tell you if you didn't already know."

My irritation flared again. "I did not ask that stupid bitch to marry me! Jesus Christ."

Tyler's hands flew up in a surrender. "Okay, man. Sorry. That's what she told us."

I raked my hands over my face. "Look, I don't mean to be a dick. I didn't know about Charlie until a few weeks ago and I'm still trying to figure it all out."

"Wow. She really kept that shit from you?"

"Yeah."

"That sucks. What are you going to do?"

I shrugged. "Don't know. What can I do?"

Tyler looked sympathetic for just a second before his mouth turned up into sly grin. "Well, it could be worse right? I mean Bella is a total MILF. I bet she's a total wildcat."

I tensed at his words. I knew he was just joking, but I didn't want him talking about her like that. If he was talking about her like that, it meant he was thinking about her like that.

_Now I have a visual in my head that needs to leave right fucking now._

"Shut the fuck up dude," I growled, throwing a stirring stick at his head.

I discretely adjusted myself at the onslaught of images and cleared my throat. "I gotta go. I'll catch you later."

"Remember, drinks."

I nodded and left. When I reached my car I took a deep breath. It was well after nine and Bella and Charlie would be at the park. I revved the engine and headed downtown.

XXXXXX

I parked at the far end of the parking lot so that I could sneak up without being seen.

Luckily, no one noticed as I approached the park. I found a tree and leaned against it watching. I was trying to pull a Jasper.

My mother had just sat down and Carlisle was running towards Charlie. I had to laugh as the little guy started shrieking. His little legs were flailing all over the place, but he never ran away. He giggled loudly as Carlisle picked him up and threw him into the air. All of the sudden I felt my stomach in my throat. I didn't know if it was the sound of his laughter or the sight of the absolute joy on his face or something else entirely, but it certainly wasn't an unpleasant feeling. I couldn't help but crack up as Carlisle made an absolute fool out of himself just to entertain a three-year-old; _my_ three-year-old.

When I saw Bella coming towards me I started to panic. She didn't look upset though and she quickly assured me that she wasn't. She invited me to join them, but I needed to know what she expected from me first; I needed to know how this would work. Initially, I think she assumed that I was accusing her again. I could see her tensing and getting ready for a fight, but I didn't want to fight, not anymore.

Her words were sarcastic and I couldn't hold back my irritation. She wanted me to be good at this. She wanted me to automatically know what it meant to be a dad, but I didn't. I didn't know what it took, because she never gave me a fucking chance to figure it out.

I could see in the way she held herself that she wanted to lash out at me. Hell, I waited for it. But it never happened. We let the moment pass and I could practically see the tension between us starting to slip away.

"You're right," she had said.

To say that I was stunned by her response would be a gross understatement. Bella had not been in the habit of seeing things from my point of view, but today, it seemed, she was willing to try. Of course, she then had to taunt me by saying that if my father could hang upside down for Charlie, then I should be able to play trucks with him. A loud guffaw slipped out and she smiled at me before turning away to look at my parents. They were trying to pretend as if they weren't watching us. I stopped laughing and had to swallow down a really odd feeling that was making me want to squirm a little. I had spent years building and carefully constructing walls around myself, to keep from getting hurt. Whatever she was doing was threatening those walls and I wasn't sure how I felt about that.

"You coming?" she asked as she turned to head back to the playground.

I looked over at my parents and then at Charlie. Taking a deep breath, I followed her.

I tried really hard not to stare at her ass as it swayed in front of me. I really did, but damn it if Tyler's words along with the visions they elicited weren't, once again, flashing through my brain. Carlisle grinned knowingly at me as we approached and I think I actually fucking blushed at having been caught. My mom greeted me, followed by Charlie. All of the sudden, I felt panic rising in my throat. I didn't know what to do with him. I looked over at Bella, silently begging her to help me. She obliged, asking Charlie if he wanted me to help him. With a little encouragement from both Bella and my mom, I bent down next to him on the ground and asked him what he was doing. The look that he gave me made me feel like a complete dipshit.

_Just like his mother. _

He talked, talked and talked some more. He talked about a whole bunch of random shit. He told me about when Grampa hit his thumb with the hammer while working on his treehouse, how it had turned purple and it was gonna fall off. He then explained how he was a pirate captain and the play set in our backyard was his ship. His mommy and Auntie Alice were his pirate crew. They were girls, but that didn't really matter. Since they were bigger and he was the captain, they had to do all of the work to make the ship go. I didn't say much to him. I didn't have to; he was a little chatterbox.

Sometimes I got completely lost with what he was telling me. His sentences didn't always make sense. He would put words together that didn't really go together and I'm pretty sure he had several made-up words in his vocabulary as well. It took me almost 5 minutes to figure out what "lasternight" meant.

He had been talking for about twenty minutes straight when Bella announced that it was time for them to head home. I found myself to be both disappointed and relieved at the same time. It was when Bella was gathering their things, not really paying any attention to us, that Charlie made a comment about his mommy crying sometimes when she was sleeping, and how it woke him up.

_What the fuck?_

I have no idea what made him think of that. At the time, he was actually telling me about the race cars that Emmett had bought him. It was completely random.

I glanced over at Bella, who was kissing Carlisle on the cheek. He had his arm wrapped around her waist and he was laughing at something she had said. She looked like she was okay. Either that or she was putting on a really fucking good show. Something I knew all about. That odd feeling came back to me, but I shook my head, effectively pushing it aside.

XXXXXX

That evening I locked myself away in the music room. I had a piece in my head that I needed to get onto paper. I don't know where it came from because I hadn't composed in years, but it had been playing in my head all day. I had been in there for a good two hours when I heard the knock at the door.

"Come in."

I put my pencil in my mouth and played out the notes I had just written down. They sounded off, but I couldn't figure out why.

The door eased open and I glanced up to see who it was. Jasper stood in the doorway. I couldn't stop the shock that I'm pretty sure was plastered on my face.

"Hey," I said, unsure of his mood.

He greeted me with just his eyes and a quick tilt of his head and made his way over to the sofa. I continued to work, waiting for him to speak. Of course, this was Jasper we were talking about. I'm pretty sure he could wait me out. He was making me nervous and I could feel myself getting a little agitated. But surprisingly, after a few minutes he spoke.

"I've been waiting for you to talk to me, Edward. I've been waiting for three fucking weeks for you to suck up your pride and ask for my help. Or at least ask for my fucking opinion."

I scoffed "You gave me your 'fucking opinion' when you reamed my shit out that night after the bar." Suddenly my anger flared. "And you fucking knew. You motherfucking knew that she was hiding him from me. How the fuck can you call yourself my best friend and not tell me?" I could feel the lump in my throat and had to grit my teeth to keep the emotion away.

"It wasn't my place to tell you that. She asked us to let her do it."

"No, you all just sat back and took her word for it. You heard her fucking side of the story and decided that I was the motherfucking bastard who deserved everything I got. But you don't know shit about what happened." My face was burning with anger and rage and...hurt. "You're my_ family_." I choked. "Didn't you ever even consider that I might have needed you. Can you even imagine what it was like for me to find out that Bella, of all people, had my baby?"

Jasper looked at me sadly. "I know more than you think I do," he sighed. "I saw the way you looked at her Edward. I saw it every Goddamn day. I saw you smile when she'd trip over her own feet, and not because you were making fun of her. I saw the way you reacted when she laughed or cried or got pissed off. I saw the anger on your face when Mike Newton was bragging about banging her in the Chief's house and I saw the pain that followed it. Everyone else may have been fucking blind Edward, but I was not."

I swallowed dryly, trying to make the lump go away, but it wouldn't. How the fuck could he know?

"You don't know," I mumbled and shook my head.

"You're right. I don't know what happened that night. I don't know what she did or said to make you snap, to make you lose control; to hurt her, but it doesn't really fucking matter does it? You destroyed the only girl who you ever truly wanted. You took her innocence away from her violently and didn't even think of the consequences." His voice was calm, but firm.

"I did think about the consequences," I snarled. "I thought about it for weeks, months, fucking years. I thought about what I had taken from her every time Alice mentioned her name. I thought about it every time I saw a girl who looked like her. Don't tell me I didn't think about it, because I did. I regretted it every minute of every day. But I couldn't fucking take it back now could I?" I felt the tears slipping down my cheeks, but I didn't fucking care anymore. They all thought I was a cruel and heartless bastard.

"You thought about it?" he chuckled humorlessly. "So, with all the fucking thinking you did, did it ever cross your mind to actually talk to her. To maybe apologize instead of walking away from her? How about this one Edward. Did it ever cross your mind that if you had manned up to begin with, you would have known about Charlie from the beginning? I don't agree with the way she did things, but Christ man, you fucking traumatized her."

I opened my mouth to say something, but shut it just as quickly. I had nothing to say.

"She's got someone," Jasper said quietly. "He's good to her."

I closed my eyes tightly. "Riley?"

"Yes."

"I don't believe it. Seriously, why would she try to hook up with that dude at the bar if she was dating this guy?"

"I don't know. They apparently have some sort of arrangement."

"Arrangement?"

"Yeah. They're friends."

"Okay."

"They're lovers."

_Fuck _

"Right now, I don't think it's serious, but I don't think it's going to stay like that."

"What do you mean?"

"Like I said, he's good to her. He's good to Charlie. I would venture to say that he probably loves them."

Once again, I felt my stomach fly up into my throat.

"They talk nearly every day. He makes her smile. He makes her blush. He asks to talk to Charlie on the phone and that little boy lights up every time he hears Riley's name or voice."

I just stared at Jasper.

"Did you know he was the first person she told she was pregnant?"

_Motherfucker_

"He's the one who took her to her appointments. He's the one who held her hand through her sonogram. Do you think a a nineteen-year-old guy does all that for a woman who's carrying someone else's baby if he's not madly in love with her?"

I shoved my hands through my hair and pulled. I didn't want to hear this. "How the fuck do you know all this?"

He smirked at me. "Because I listen. If you weren't so busy trying to be an asshole all the time, you would hear more; learn more. I know what you're trying to hide; what you're trying to protect yourself from, but you're going to lose her, Edward. You're going to lose them both. You have one chance to make this right," Jasper said somberly. "I'm not taking her side, like I said, I don't agree with what she did. I think she screwed you over. I think she screwed all of us over, including herself. But most of all, I think she screwed Charlie over. But what is being angry with her going to solve. She knows she made a fucking mistake, but all you've done is made her feel defensive. She's not going to let you in if you do nothing but yell at her. You have every right to be angry. Jesus, if it were me, I would have lost my shit too, but get over it; deal with it. Make. It. Right. If you don't, you're going to be watching some other man with your fucking family."

I watched as Jasper stood up and walked out without saying another word. I was completely and utterly dumbfounded. A picture flashed in my head. A picture of a faceless man standing next to Bella with his arm around her waist. She was leaning into him lovingly. He was smiling as he held Charlie in his arms and Charlie was looking up at him in complete adoration. I could literally feel the blood draining from my face. I felt sick. Was I ready to do this daddy thing? I didn't really know, but I sure as shit new I wasn't ready for anyone else to take on that role for Charlie either.

XXXXXXX

***I woke up the next morning with an excruciating pain in my groin. I tried to roll over, but gasped as I realized that I was unbelievably hard. This was beyond morning wood. There were very few incidents in my life where I had been this hard, including the ones where a naked woman was either in front of me, underneath me, or on top of me.

"Oh fuck," I groaned as I rolled onto my back and grabbed my dick. I shoved my pants down my hips to get a better hold, squeezed it firmly, and began to stroke.

I had no idea what had caused this. I couldn't really remember my dreams, but it had to have been from something in my subconscious. There was no way that this shit just happened.

I tried to imagine some nameless, faceless girl as she wrapped her small hands around my cock and started pumping me. I could feel her body pressed up against mine, her warm breath on my neck.

I swiped a bit of pre-cum from the tip and used it to lubricate myself a little. I did it again as my fantasy girl lowered herself down my body. Her tongue darted out and swirled around the head before her mouth completely enveloped me. My pumping became faster as the girl's head bobbed up and down on my cock, licking and sucking. I imagined looking down to watch. I loved to fucking watch. And then, the girl looked up at me. She was no longer faceless or nameless.

I exploded suddenly and unexpectedly into my hand and all over my sheets.

"Motherfucking goddamit," I shouted probably a little too loudly as I continued to pulse and twitch. I hadn't wanted to do that. I groaned and put my non-defiled hand over my face. ***

I had been trying so hard to keep her out of my mind like that. I didn't deserve to fantasize about her. Not that I had never done it, because I most certainly had, but it just seemed like the turn of events from the last month required me to readjust those fantasies.

Knowing the actual damage that I had done to her body that night. God, I left her bruised and bleeding. I had made her fucking sick. And then I left her, unknowingly, with a permanent reminder of the night I took her virginity from her in such a disgusting way. How could I even think about getting off to her? But, I just fucking had; and it felt incredible; and I felt guilty.

I slid my pants the rest of the way down my legs and pulled them off, using them to wipe off my hand. I was going to have to change my sheets too, there was cum everywhere. Gross.

I walked, naked, to the bathroom, throwing my pants in the laundry hamper and turning on the shower to let it heat up. Stepping under the steaming spray, I thought about Jasper's words from last night. I didn't even know this guy, Riley. I had only heard about him briefly from Jake and Alice, and then again from Jasper last night, but he was already pissing me off. He hadn't visited the whole time I had been back so their relationship couldn't be that serious, could it? But, Jasper said that Charlie lit up when he talked to him on the phone. I had never talked to Charlie on the phone. Would he light up if I did call to talk to him? Fuck, probably not. He barely even knew my name. And what about Bella? Jazz said he thought that Riley was in love with her. Was Bella in love with him too? She sure as shit didn't act like it, at least not that I had seen. But, I knew better than most that sometimes you do stupid shit to hide your true feelings. Sometimes, it's easier to distract yourself with instant gratification, lust and sex than face deep seeded emotions that have the ability to tear you apart. Is that what Bella was doing with Riley? Would she suddenly come to her senses and take what he was offering her? Would Charlie soon call him 'daddy'?

By the end of my shower, I was convinced. I wasn't going to let this Riley fucker take my place. Charlie was _my_ kid and I would do my damnedest to prove to Bella that I could be a good father. I had no idea how, since I was still pretty petrified of him, but I was a smart guy, I could figure it out. I hoped.

I texted Bella asking her if we could do something with Charlie this weekend. I wanted to tell her as soon as possible so that she knew I was serious. The longer I waited, the more she would question my intentions.

She responded pretty quickly. She thought I wanted to do it on my own. The thought made my heart race and my palms sweat. I wasn't ready for that. Sheepishly, I made sure she knew that I was going to need her help. I felt stupid. I really couldn't handle a three-year-old? No, no I couldn't.

As I waited for her response, I was startled by the phone actually ringing. I picked it up.

"What are you thinking?"

Shit, I was out of line. Really? I tried to explain, but she stopped me. That's not what she meant. She wanted to know what I wanted to do. Well, hell if I knew.

Before I knew it, she said, "I'll pick you up at ten," and hung up.

I blinked a few times and looked at my phone, which now read 'Call Ended'.

"What's the matter with you?" Alice's voice startled me.

I answered automatically. "Bella."

"Oh," she said almost hesitantly.

Her expression told me that she knew at least part of what Jasper and I had talked about last night. Of course, Alice already knew some of it to begin with. She was the only person that I had ever talked to about my feelings for Bella when we were kids.

"She's coming to pick me up."

Alice's eyes grew wide. "For what?"

"Uh, I don't know. I called to ask if we could do something with Charlie and she just said to she'd be here at ten."

Alice tried to hide her growing excitement, but it was useless. Without a word she threw herself at me, hugging me tightly, almost painfully.

"Make this right, Edward, please," she whispered.

I wrapped my arms around her and nodded against her head. I guess my decision was made.

XXXXXX

Whoever thought up the idea of throwing a whole bunch of inflatable jumpy castles into a warehouse and charging money to let kids run wild, was a fucking genius.

Bella was laughing at me as I gaped. And then she touched me. Her warm fingers gripped my arm and I jumped a little. I didn't move because I didn't want her to let go, the feel of skin against mine was amazing and it was almost as though I was craving her touch. But my reaction, or lack there of, had the opposite effect. She dropped her hand and apologized. I let her lead me to the seating area, mainly so I could watch her ass again

Charlie and a couple of kids took off screaming. Bella made a comment about how easy it was for kids to make friends.

She looked so sad and I wondered why. She had a lot of friends in high school, she must have made friends in college, right? Or at least kept in touch with a few from high school? I knew things weren't easy for her, but she must have had some support. The fact that I didn't know started to bother me. There was a lot of stuff I didn't know.

She let me ask my questions and luckily, my stupid mouth didn't piss her off too much. When she told me that Charlie had only been playing around on the piano for a month I was surprised. He seemed so comfortable and his ability to pick up notes that fit together was pretty impressive. I suggested that he was ready for lessons. I wasn't quite ready to tell her that I wanted to be the one to teach him, because the look on her face told me that she might not be open to that idea.

When Charlie first started begging me to come with him I was a little hesitant, but after Bella reassured me that it would be okay I went ahead and gave in. As I climbed into the first bouncy, I instantly regretted that decision. I fell down, several times, before Charlie jumped on me.

"Shit," I grumbled as I prepared myself to make another attempt at standing.

"Awwww, Eward you said 'shit'."

I started laughing. I couldn't help it; it was fucking funny to hear that coming out of his mouth. "Yeah, uh, no I didn't."

"Yes you did, I heared you."

"Okay, well pretend you didn't hear it okay?" I glanced nervously over at Bella. It didn't look like she had heard anything.

Charlie frowned at me, but he recovered quickly. "Come on," he said, reaching his hand out for me.

I looked up at him amused. What did this kid weigh? Thirty pounds? And he was going to pull my one hundred and eighty pound self up?

_Sorry kid, I don't think so. _

But I reached out for him anyway. I enclosed his tiny little hand in mine and he immediately leaned backwards with everything he had. I chuckled again, but tried to push myself up. Eventually, I got myself into a standing position.

"Jump," he demanded animatedly.

I raised my eyebrows at him.

"You gotta jump, Eward."

I chuckled and took a tentative bounce. Charlie grinned. I bounced again, this time hard enough to make him lose his balance, but he didn't fall because he was still holding onto my hands. An idea came to me and before Charlie could do anything else I jumped...hard. His tiny little body flew up into the air. I saw surprise, fear, and then excitement pass over his features as his grip on my hands tightened. When he landed back down he broke into another fit of giggles.

"Do that again," he shouted.

We bounced some more, went through an inflatable obstacle course and slid down a huge slide together before I returned to Bella. Her teeth were once again raking over her teeth, but this time she was smiling.

"That's just as much fun as it looks," I gasped, trying to get my breath back.

Charlie was still zooming around like a mad man, but the second Bella mentioned Pizza Playground, he was at our sides putting on his shoes.

I watched Charlie eat, or rather inhale, his food, fairly sure he was going to choke. But of course, he didn't. And before I knew it, he was off to play again. Bella wasn't kidding about his energy.

"Iwannadoit,' I spit out quickly before I lost my nerve. "I, uh, I want to, I mean, I'd like to...I don't need two weeks."

Bella just stared at me for a second. She looked like she was in shock. I swallowed nervously.

"Uh, are you absolutely sure?"

I admit that my reaction to finding out about Charlie had been less than stellar, but it had been almost a month. Now that I had had a chance to process it all, I was absolutely fucking sure. At least I thought I was. Charlie was _my_ son and I wasn't going to let someone else take my place because I couldn't get my shit together fast enough.

I couldn't read her. I had no idea what she was thinking, and she didn't tell me. She simply nodded and then got ready to leave.

On the way home I took Alice's advice. She had suggested at dinner that I offer an olive branch in regards to moving in. I knew that Bella and Charlie living there was going to complicate things. Especially since Bella and I were still barely getting along. But, maybe having them close would be a good thing. I could interact with Charlie more often, and maybe even figure out how to bond with him. Maybe then, I wouldn't feel so nervous around him. And, although I would never admit it out loud, I wanted to know when that fucker Riley was around. I wanted to see for myself what he was really after.

XXXXX

The rest of the weekend went by quickly. On Friday afternoon, after Bella dropped me back at home, I drove back to Port Angeles to stop in at the clinic. It had been nearly a month since that stupid one night stand and I needed to make sure that I was clean.

I had Heidi, one of our nurses, draw my blood for an HIV test and scheduled to have Dr. Oleander check me out the following Tuesday.

Bella and Charlie came over for dinner on Saturday night and Charlie watched me play the piano. His face was completely awed and it made me smile. We watched a movie called "Meet the Robinsons" which was actually pretty fucking cute, and Charlie fell asleep against my arm. I carried him to the car and Bella strapped him into his seat. He never even stirred.

I didn't see them again for the next few days because work was keeping me busy, but I did talk to Charlie on the phone on Monday night before Bella put him to bed. It wasn't a real conversation. I still didn't know what to say to him and I think he was just too tired to form a completely coherent sentence. Bella had to translate a lot.

On Tuesday morning I met with Dr. Oleander early. I provided him with a urine sample and he checked out my goods. He didn't really say anything to me, but I could see that he wasn't entirely pleased. Later in the afternoon he called me into his office. Heidi had said that the blood test results came in with the days batch just before lunch so I knew that I would be getting the full report.

"Edward." Dr. Oleander looked at me hesitantly as he motioned for me to sit.

_Shit, what the fuck do those test results say? _

"You're tests are clean, son."

I let out a huge sigh of relief.

_Thank fucking God. _

"Look. I am not here to lecture you, but since you've asked me to run these tests for you, I can't let you leave without making sure that you know the risks of unprotected sexual activity."

I snorted. "Trust me Doc, I know the risks."

Dr. Oleander raised an eyebrow up at me in question. Did I really want to tell him this? Wasn't it better to keep my private life private? But, now he was thinking I was some serial STD offender. Bella was the only girl I ever had sex with without a rubber and I knew for a fact that she was clean. But shit, he didn't know any of that.

I took a deep breath and looked down at my hands that were rubbing against my scrub clad thighs. "I found out about a month ago that I have a kid. Charlie, he's three."

It was getting a little easier, to think of him as my kid, my son. I even felt the corner of my mouth start to twitch into a smile as I said his name.

Dr. Oleander didn't comment. He stood up, rested his hand against my shoulder and squeezed tightly.

"You should have another HIV screen in three to six months just to make sure. I would highly recommend condom use until then." He hesitated and then turned to face me again. "Actually, I would recommend condom use until you're in a committed monogamous relationship, but that's entirely up to you."

I nodded and lifted my head. "Thanks, Doc."

I went back to work, but not an hour later I was accosted by Jessica as I poured myself a cup of coffee in the break room.

"Hey, Edward," she purred.

I glanced up quickly, not wanting to make eye contact with her just in case she misread it.

"Jessica."

"So," she said, and I felt her fingertips ghost across my shoulder blades. "I heard your test results came back clean."

My head shot up. "How the fuck would you hear that? It's supposed to be confidential."

She shot a sheepish look at me and batted her eyelashes. "Well, it is, but I was just filing. I didn't mean to look, it was kind of an accident."

"How was it a fucking accident Jess?"

"I...uh, I dropped the file and the results just fell out. I mean, I dropped a couple of them so I had to look at the names so that I could put them back in the right files. I'm sorry. If it makes you feel any better, I can tell you my results. I got them back a couple of weeks ago and I'm clean too."

I rolled my eyes. "It doesn't make me feel any better. You shouldn't be looking at my shit."

I felt her fake fingernails scratch the back of my neck and I shuddered, not in a good way.

"Come on Eddie. I've been waiting for you to call."

I turned to face her. Shit, she was really close, almost on top of me. She looked predatory. If I had stood there any longer, I'm pretty sure she would have sexually assaulted me. Instead, I pushed myself past her, scoffing.

"Next time, mind your own fucking business," I growled as I walked out of the break room.

Jessica didn't say anything else to me the rest of the day. She huffed loudly every time I had to get close to her, but that was about it.

XXXXX

At five o'clock, I booked it out of the office so fast you would have thought my pants were on fire.

I stopped by the Thriftway when I got back to Forks to pick up a few things for Alice. She was making dinner and had forgotten shredded cheese and fresh basil.

I grabbed a bag of cheese and a packet of basil leaves quickly. I was just about to head to the check-out when I felt something hit the back of my legs. They buckled slightly and I looked down to see two tiny hands wrapped around my the front of my thighs. Suddenly, a head of bronze hair shot through my legs and looked up at me. I laughed, loudly.

"Hi, Eward," Charlie grinned.

"Well, hi to you too."

I heard a soft giggle behind me and turned to see Bella. My mouth dropped. She was wearing a tan colored skirt that was fitted tightly around her hips and ass and then flared out a little at the bottom. Her blouse was bright red and she had a pair of black heeled boots that came up to just below her knees. Her hair hung loosely around her face and her lips were glistening like she had just wet them. I stared at them probably for a few seconds too long.

"Wow," I breathed.

Bella smirked.

"Charlie baby, let go of Edward's legs please."

I felt him shake his head 'no'. I set my two items down before grabbing his arms, lifting him into the air and then settling him on my forearm.

"Whadya mean 'no'?" I asked, sticking my finger in between his ribs and tickling.

Charlie squealed.

"I didn't peg you for the cooking type," Bella teased.

"Oh, I can cook. Nothing extravagant, but well enough. You look nice, what are you all dressed up for?"

"I had a meeting with Luke today."

_Who the fuck is Luke?_

"My boss, Luke," Bella said as if she could read my mind. Or did I say that out loud? Shit. I hate it when that happens.

Charlie was playing with my clinic ID tag that was hanging around my neck. He didn't call me out on my bad language, so maybe I didn't say it out loud.

"Hey, Alice is making dinner tonight. Do you guys want to come over?" I asked nervously, not sure if I was pushing the boundaries of our apparent silent truce.

Bella blushed. "Thanks, Edward, but we actually have plans."

I cocked my head at her, but I didn't ask. I didn't need to.

"We're going to Uncle Jake's house for a fire," Charlie chirped from his perch on my arm.

"A fire?"

"We're meeting up with Billy, Jake, and a few other people down at First Beach for a barbecue and bonfire," Bella explained. "Jake's eyeing up a new girl and wants my opinion."

I chuckled. Jake had always been a good guy. We didn't ever really hang out when we were younger, because he lived on the reservation, but he had dated a few girls that ran in my circle, so I got to know him a little here and there.

"Well, have fun." I set Charlie down and Bella reached for his hand.

"Bye Edward," she said. Charlie waved and followed his mother.

Once again, my eyes were drawn to her backside. I felt myself grow hard as the images I had envisioned a few mornings ago replayed themselves in my mind.

Embarrassed and a little flustered, I quickly grabbed the cheese and basil and went to the checkout.

It was becoming more and more evident to me that the indifference that I had convinced myself of over the last four years, and the anger and resentment that I had felt for Bella over the last month hadn't replaced my old feelings, but merely masked them. I was in a lot of fucking trouble.

**BPOV**

I was amazed at how well Edward was doing with Charlie once he accepted that he wanted to be a part of his life. Not that he didn't screw up, he did, but it wasn't too bad. Of course, it had only been a few days so the jury was still out, but he really was trying and I couldn't help but appreciate that. He didn't always know how to respond to questions and often had to look at me for help. His expectations for Charlie seemed either too high or too low, but he seemed to enjoy being around him. He _really _liked playing the piano for him. Charlie was completely mesmerized by Edward's playing and probably could have watched him for hours at a time.

Sitting at First Beach on Tuesday night, I let the dancing flames of the fire hypnotize me into an extremely relaxed state. Well, it was the fire along with the three beers I had consumed. Yes, three beers and I was pretty much toast. Charlie was lying down at my feet sleeping on a blanket that we had laid out for him on the sand. I felt someone sit down on the log next to me and turned to see Jake.

"Hey Bells," he smiled. He was also a little drunk so his eyes didn't focus and his speech was slurred. "Whatcha thinkin about?"

"Hmmm. Nothing much," I lied.

"Edward huh?"

"How the fuck do you do that?" I asked incredulously.

"I know you Bells. I also know that you've been spending more time with him."

"It's for Charlie," I defended.

"I know it is, baby," he teased, patting me on the knee and pulling me closer.

The thing I loved about drunk Jacob, he never could remember to stay on one topic too long.

"So, What about my girl?"

I grinned at him. "She's cute Jake, and really nice. I think you should go for it."

"Really?"

I nodded.

He grinned back at me and put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into a tight hug.

"I love you Bells, you know that right?"

"I love you too Jake."

XXXXX

If I had thought that I would wait to accept Esme's offer for the apartment, Tuesday night was the last straw.

Charlie had a nightmare. In all of his thrashing, he ended up sideways and managed to kick me in the face. His heel came in direct contact with my eye socket...hard. After being woken from a dead sleep at two in the morning and swearing up a storm, I used one of his boo boo bunnies to ice my eye.

If that wasn't enough, I couldn't get back to sleep so I was forced to watch infomercials and reruns of Family Matters. By the time my dad got up at five I was a really big ball of pissed off and grumpy.

I showed up with, Charlie in tow, at Cullen Interior Designs and Remodeling at ten o'clock sharp. I left him to be entertained by Alice as I entered Esme's office where she was arranging some flowers that were sitting on her desk.

She looked up at me and grinned.  
"Hello, sweetheart," she beamed. " What can I do for…..Oh, my dear lord, what happened to your eye?"

Yep, that's right. I was sporting the mother of all black eyes thanks to my three-year-old.

"I think Charlie had a nightmare," I groaned. " My face got in the way."

Esme tried to stifle her snicker, but I still saw it.

"Emmett used to do that too," she sympathized. " After he kicked his father in the….well, in the….."

"I got the picture Esme," I laughed.

"Well, after that, Edward never let him sleep with us again."

I was quiet for a few minutes as I let Esme deal with her thought process. I had rarely, if ever, heard her talk about her first husband. After a few moments she relaxed again and I thought that it was time.

"Esme?"

"Yes, dear," she answered, continuing to fiddle with her arrangement. When I didn't speak again she glanced up at me.

I was biting my lip and shifting from foot to foot.

"What's the matter, sweetheart?" she asked, genuinely concerned.

"Um, is that offer still available?" I asked nervously. I'm not sure what I expected to change in just a couple of days, but I had to ask.

Esme's eyes brightened and her lips curved upwards. "Oh, Bella, of course it is," she grinned as she came over to hug me.

She wrapped me up in a warm embrace and I soaked it all in. I loved Esme's hugs. It had been so long since I had seen my own mother that I had forgotten what these hugs felt like. Renee had never even come out to visit Charlie. I talked to her once or twice after he was born, but she never expressed an interest in being a part in my life, or in his. So I didn't force the issue. But she had another thing coming if she thought that she was going to waltz into his life after years of neglect.

The more I watched Charlie with Edward, the more I was coming to terms with the fact that I had most likely made a mistake in keeping them apart. I wanted to, no, I needed to give him the opportunity to be there for his son, but at the same time, I had to make sure that he wasn't going to come into his life just to leave again. I was not going to let my baby be traumatized or confused by people who couldn't remain consistent. That's what my mother had done to me. She abandoned me when things got too tough and had tried very sporadically to re-enter my life throughout the years. It fucked with my head when she would call every week for two months and then I wouldn't hear from her again for another year. I wouldn't let anyone do that to my child, especially his father.

"When were you thinking of moving?" Esme asked, thankfully interrupting my nasty thought train.

"I hadn't really thought about it honestly," I replied. "We don't really have much to move, so it probably wouldn't take more than a few hours."

"Well, I can probably get someone in there to paint early next week. If we gave it a few days for the fumes to clear out, you could move in next weekend," she said, barely able to control her excitement.

"You don't need to paint Esme. It's wonderful just as it is."

I didn't want her putting more money into me than she already was.

"Oh please," she clipped. "That place hasn't been painted since it was built and it's high time it got a fresh coat. Plus, Alice and I would like to do something special for Charlie's room."

I went to protest again, but she wasn't having any of it. She raised her hand, and I knew that it was pointless to argue.

"I would like to work out some kind of exchange," I said firmly.

Esme just looked at me with a confused expression on her face.

"I know that you're not going to accept rent, but I'd like to pay utilities and I'd like to find some way for me to repay you."

Esme opened her mouth, but then closed it again, nodding her head in silent acceptance.

We agreed that a week from Saturday, Charlie and I would officially be moving into the Cullen household. Holy shit, what was I getting myself into?

XXXXX

**AN: This will be a short one. **

**So you are getting a little bit more insight into Edward. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Please understand that Jasper was not trying to be a jerk, he DOES NOT agree with what Bella did, but he knew that there was only one way to get Edward to understand what he would be giving up if he continued to be indecisive.**

**Also, I DID mean Edward when talking about Emmett kicking his father in the balls. Edward Masen is the Cullen kids' biological father, Esme's first husband. **

**For those of you who are missing the angst and drama, never fear, she shall be returning soon. **

**Next week: Bella moves in and Edward gets himself into some trouble. **

**Reviews get teasers as usual. **

**I don't have a rec this week. I just couldn't decide which one by posting time so I'll just wait until next week. **


	14. Two Steps Back: Part 1

**AN: Hiya.**

**So here's what's happening this week. This chapter turned out to be a beast; over 13000 words. So I decided to break it into two sections. The first obviously, is this one. The second part will be posted on Saturday b/c I made certain promises about what would be happening this week and I don't want to go back on my word. **

**You all have been absolutely amazing. Thank you so much for all of your kind words, your support, and your passion for what this young family is going through. Thank you to my girls on the Twilighted thread for always helping me through my panic.**

**Thank you Mel and Mollie for making this bad boy presentable. Without you it would probably suck. LOL. **

**For anyone who is either re-reading parts or just starting to read. I have been making changes to earlier chapters so if you're wondering why the formatting of various chapters is different, that's why. It's happening slowly though b/c I do things like write 13000 word chapters. ;-)**

**Stephenie Meyer owns them, I'm just making things difficult for them.**

Chapter 13 Part 1: Two Steps Back

BPOV

"Daddy, I'mmovingintotheCullen's apartment," I said quickly, flinching in anticipation of his reaction.

"I know," he said with a slight chuckle. He didn't slam his paper down and he didn't spill his coffee. He didn't even look up at me.

"What do you mean you know?"

I sounded like a spoiled child, but I didn't care. I had expected him to throw a fit about it. To tell me that I wasn't going anywhere. That he needed me to stay and that it was a bad idea, because Edward was there. But he didn't.

"Esme told me last week that she had invited you to live there."

"She did?" I asked, astonished.

"Yup."

"So, you're not mad?"

I was a little disappointed.

"I think it's a probably a good idea Bells. You and Charlie are cramped up in that little room and it's about time you moved on to bigger and better," he said, as he finally lifted his eyes to me.

I could see a little bit of sadness in his eyes, but he hid it well.

"Won't you get lonely?" I huffed.

"Bells, you will be living 10 minutes down the road. I can visit any time I want. I can even use your spare bedroom," he snickered.

"I was expecting more of a fight outta you," I grumbled dejectedly.

"Sweetheart," he said laying his hand down on top of mine. "I will miss not having you both around, but in all honesty, you need to do this. You both need more space than this little house can provide. I've always known that you wouldn't stay forever. I think that if Esme and Carlisle are willing to help you get on your feet, while still supporting your independence, then you should go for it. I'm not thrilled about you being so close to Edward, but...he's Charlie's father. There's nothing I can do to change that. You made your choice four years ago to leave him out. As much as I love you, that's never a decision that I supported regardless of whether or not I actually liked the boy. Which, by the way, I don't."

_I really loved it when my dad was this insightful._

"I know you don't. I kind of appreciate the fact that you haven't killed him yet."

"Yeah, well don't count me out just yet. I'm just waiting for him to let his guard down. Then I'll take him," Dad smirked.

"Ha, you are so funny."

He raised his eyebrows at me, silently telling me that he wasn't really kidding. Hmmmm.

"In any case, it's better than you leaving Forks entirely."

"Yeah," I nodded.

"So when's the day?"

"A week from Saturday."

"Are you going to need some help? I think I might have to work that day."

"Uh, I don't know Dad. I don't think so, but I'll let you know."

"Okay then," he said and went back to his paper.

That was my dad. He said what he needed to say and then went back to what he was doing.

XXXXXXX

Thursday morning I arrived at the park with Charlie to find Edward standing by the bench. He turned just in time to catch a leaping Charlie with a big grin on his face. He swung him through the air just once before setting him down and letting him run towards the slide.

"Good morning," he smiled.

I lifted my eyebrows, but couldn't help the grin that plastered itself across my face.

"Hi. Don't you have to work?"

"I asked to have Thursday mornings off. Since I'm a volunteer, Dr. Oleander didn't really have the ability to say 'no'." He reached down and picked up a coffee that was sitting on the bench. "I got you coffee."

"How do you know what I drink?" I teased.

"Trust me Bella, you'll like it," he smirked.

I took a tentative sip, closed my eyes, and relished the sweetness that met my tongue. I sighed happily, licking at the foam that had squirted out of the lid. Caramel Macchiato; my one indulgence. The treat I give myself when I've had a bad morning. Not that it had been a bad morning by any means, but what a nice way to start my day anyway.

"Thank you," I kind of moaned. When I opened my eyes, I swear Edward looked like he was about to eat me. And he was really fucking close. I could feel the warmth from his body and feel the electric current that seemed to be vibrating from him. His mouth was parted, his jaw set. I had to turn away. I couldn't stand there and let him look at me like that. I took a step backwards and looked around him to see where Charlie had gone.

I heard Edward gasp and my attention was drawn to him again.

"What the fuck happened to your eye?" he scowled.

I groaned. "Ugh, don't ask."

I saw his face darken and his eyes narrowed. He took a step toward me again. I flinched as his hands shot out toward me, not for any other reason than I wasn't expecting it and my eye still fucking hurt. He stopped abruptly, his hands freezing mid-air and his eyes shifted to meet mine. He slowly reached his hand and grasped my chin, turning my face, carefully examining my swollen and bruised cheek, nose, and eye socket. I swallowed audibly, licked my bottom lip, and then bit down on it nervously. His hands were warm and gentle. His thumb brushed over my cheekbone.

"Bella, did someone hit you?"

I laughed a little, still not understanding his seriousness. "No, someone kicked me."

His nostrils flared and his jaw tensed. He looked...pissed? Why the hell was he pissed?

"I'm gonna kill that motherfucker," he growled in a low, almost inaudible voice.

My eyes widened and my mouth gaped. "What?"

And then I understood. "Oh, Jesus Christ Edward, Charlie; it was Charlie."

"Excuse me?"

"Charlie, my...our son. He kicked me in the fucking face during a nightmare Tuesday night."

He appeared to be studying me for a minute before he let out a loud sigh of relief and visibly relaxed.

"Who the hell did you think it was?" I snorted.

Edward didn't laugh though. He looked down, scratching the back of his head.

"Edward?"

"I, uh, I thought...shit Bella, I don't know the guy."

I frowned. "What guy?"

"Um, that Riley dude," he mumbled.

"How...how do you know about Riley?" I asked, completely stunned. I was pretty sure that I had not told him about Riley.

He scrunched up his face in a kind of grimace. "Jake, said something about him once; Alice, Jasper. I've heard little bits here and there."

"Oh."

"So, he didn't hit you?"

"Ha, yeah, you really don't know Riley, he could never hurt me," I scoffed.

I saw something flash in Edward's eyes, but he covered it pretty quickly.

"So, um,...is he your, uh, your boyfriend?"

I blew a puff of air out of my mouth and shifted. "Yeah, not so sure I feel comfortable talking about this with you."

"Why not?"

I looked at him incredulously. "Really?"

He shrugged his shoulders.

"Another time Edward."

He took a sip of his coffee, silently acquiescing to my request.

"Mom said you're moving in," he said quietly.

"Yeah. I wasn't sure I was ready to do it so soon, but after this," I said pointing to my eye. "I just got fed up. He's kicked and punched me before, but never like this."

"So you really share a bed with him?"

"I have been since we moved back. When we were in family housing at UW, we only had a one bedroom apartment unit, but it was big enough for his crib to fit in there with me. He ended up with me half the time anyway, but he's a heavy sleeper so it was easy to move him back once he fell back asleep."

"I'm not sure he's as heavy a sleeper as you think," Edward said cautiously.

I furrowed my brow. "What do you mean?"

"He, uh, he mentioned something about you waking him up sometimes."

"What?"

_What the fuck is he talking about? _

"I don't know. Last week, he said that you...that you make noises when you sleep and that it wakes him up."

"I didn't...really?"

Edward nodded.

"What exactly brought that up?" I questioned suspiciously.

"I have no idea. He was telling me about some race cars and then all of the sudden he said it."

"Eward, will you play wif me?" Charlie interrupted before I could ask any more questions.

"Sure buddy," Edward smiled.

"Mama, you can play too?"

I groaned a little. Edward laughed. "Oh, come on mama, PWEASE?" he teased, clasping his hands together, tilting his head to the side, and sticking out his lower lip.

I shoved him backwards a little and he winked at me with a crooked smile.

Oh, that crooked smile; the bane of my existence. The smile that made me weak in the knees from the moment I first laid eyes on him. He knew what that smile did to me, and every other girl who had ever either had the pleasure, or had been unfortunate enough to be on receiving end of it. I sighed and forced myself to ignore said smile.

Charlie and Edward took off running in the opposite direction. I gathered myself together before I joined them.

Charlie was in seventh heaven, loving the fact that he had two people chasing him around. We cornered him and he scream giggled before dodging through Edward's legs. Edward could have easily caught him, but instead he feigned frustration and disappointment and turned to chase him again.

Eventually Charlie begged Edward to push him on the swing and I sat back down. I watched as Charlie rose higher and higher into the air.

"Edward," I called out nervously. "Maybe you shouldn't push him so high."

"Why Not?" he called out.

Everything happened in slow motion. On the backwards swing, at the highest point, Charlie's grip slipped and he starting falling. I always thought that if something like that were happening to my child that I would be able to act; that I would be able to run and dive and catch him before he hurt himself. Instead, I sat there, unable to actually move my body; frozen. I started out with a gasp, which was followed by a scream. I was sure he was going to hit the ground and break open his skull. But he didn't. Edward's arms shot out, wrapped around Charlie's small body and pulled him into his chest as the two of them crumbled to the ground.

"Shit!" I cried out as my legs finally started functioning and I bolted towards them. I could hear Charlie wailing. Edward sat on the ground, his arms still tightly around my baby. He was pale and his face registered shock and fear.

I fell to my knees in front of them and tried to pull Charlie from Edward's arms, but his grip was too tight. I had to settle for wrapping my arms around them both.

"Oh Charlie, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry," Edward chanted.

I couldn't speak. I rested my cheek against Charlie's head and waited for his cries to taper off, leaving only the occasional hiccough and sniffle.

I didn't yell at Edward. I didn't need to. The look on his face was enough to assure me that he understood what had happened and why.

"It's probably time for us to go," I whispered. We hadn't been there the full two hours, but Charlie's eyes were heavy as he rested against Edward's chest and I was pretty sure that he had had enough for the day.

Edward followed me to the car, carrying Charlie, who had still not let him go. He set him in his booster and spoke to him quietly. I couldn't hear what he was saying, but I saw Charlie nod his head. Edward ruffled his hair and then shut the door. He hesitated before turning around to face me. When he did, his eyes were closed.

"Just get it out Bella. I know you want to," he grumbled. He looked so miserable.

I silently slipped my hand into his. He jumped and his eyes flew open, zeroing in on where I was now touching him. I squeezed.

"When Charlie first turned two, Jake took him down to first beach. He let him play on the rocks and he fell off and broke his arm."

Edward tore his eyes from our joined hands and looked up at me.

"Last year, Riley was babysitting. When he wasn't paying attention, Charlie climbed up on the countertop to get something and ended up falling and hitting his head on the floor. We had to take him to the emergency room for a concussion."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because we all make mistakes, Edward. Even I've been guilty of it. When Charlie was three months old, I left him on the changing table for just a split second to turn around and grab a onsie out of the drawer. In that split second, he rolled himself over, for the first time, and fell straight off the table. It's a learning experience. He was scared, yes, but he'll get over it. I guarantee that next time we come to the park, he'll be begging you to push him that high again."

"Uh, no, not gonna happen," Edward snorted.

I smiled. "See, learning experience."

I felt Edward's hand shifting and realized what he was doing. He intertwined our fingers and leaned into me, kissing me softly on the cheek.

"Thank you," he whispered in my ear.

His warm breath fanned over me, making me shiver. It was such a sweet and gentle offering. All too soon, he pulled back, letting go of my hand. He rapped his knuckles on the window and waved to Charlie and then started walking backwards towards his own car.

"I'll see you guys this weekend?"

I nodded. "I think so, my dad's going on some five day fishing retreat with Harry Clearwater and Emmett has been hounding me for some Charlie time, so..."

"Okay, well good. I'll, uh, see you later then."

XXXXXXX

True to my word, Charlie and I ended up on the Cullen's doorstep on Friday evening with overnight bags in hand. Alice had insisted on some girl time. Charlie would be staying in the guest room and Alice, Rose and I were going to 'camp out' in the basement. I believe that makeovers and margaritas were to be involved.

It sounded like so much fun that I could barely contain myself. I remembered the envy I felt whenever my classmates would talk about their girl's nights. I had never had one. I had never left Charlie overnight before and now I was in a position where I didn't have to. Esme said she'd take the baby monitor for me and if he woke up, she'd take care of him. It was moments like that where I realized what my life could have been like had I just been honest. Even if Edward hadn't accepted it, Esme and Carlisle would have helped me. I don't think that I ever would have been the party animal that most of the people I knew were, because the fact was, I had a kid, but maybe I could have had a little bit more of a normal social life.

I pushed the thought aside as we all lounged in the basement eating pizza and drinking sodas, wine and beer. The boys were trying to teach Charlie how to play air hockey and foosball. Alice was giving me a pedicure while I leaned back against a bean back. Esme was getting quite tipsy on her third glass of wine and Rose was filing her nails and chatting about her new job, which she had just started at the week before. The kids weren't back at school yet, but the teachers had their prep days and she was acclimating herself to her classroom and co-workers.

At around eight, Esme took a very sleepy little boy upstairs, but not before we all got our kisses from him.

"Why aren't you taking him, Edward?" Rose asked abruptly after Esme and Charlie had disappeared.

Edward looked startled. "What do you mean?"

"He's your kid, shouldn't you be the one with the baby monitor?"

I groaned and shook my head at him. "Rose, Esme asked to do it. It's fine."

"I'm only asking. It's just that, all you've done is play with him. You do realize that part of being a parent is actually taking care of him right?"

"Don't do this," I begged.

"What the fuck would you know about being a parent?" Edward snapped.

"Oh, Bro, please don't go there," Emmett mumbled, knowing, just like the rest of us, that something bad was about to happen.

"More than you. I may not have any kids yet, but you better believe that when I do I'm not going to fucking bail on them," Rose snarled.

I watched Edward face turn red. He looked like a tea kettle ready to blow, complete with steam coming out of his ears.

"I didn't fucking bail on him," he yelled.

"Oh, I'm sorry, you just bailed on Bella didn't you."

_And...I'm out._

I jumped up, startling Alice and took off up the stairs.

I heard both Alice and Rose calling after me, but I ignored them. I didn't really know where to go so I just slid out the patio door and sat down on one of the cushioned loveseats.

It was so peaceful. The crickets were chirping loudly and the bullfrogs were croaking. The mid-August night time air was a little chilly, but not enough to force me back inside. I pulled my knees into my chest and wrapped my arms around myself.

I heard the door open and close behind me and I figured Rose was coming to apologize. I know that she didn't mean to upset me. She had always had a hard time with Edward and it wasn't unusual for her to pick a fight with him, but I didn't need her to fight my battles, and I didn't appreciate that she had used me and Charlie in her latest attempt to piss him off.

"Can I sit down?"

I looked up only to see Edward standing over me. I nodded and, instead of sitting in one of the other chairs, he planted himself right next to me, unfolding a blanket that he held in his hands and draping it over my shoulders. I pulled it off of me and let go of my legs, letting them dangle before replacing the blanket over both of our laps.

We were silent for a long while. He didn't attempt to say anything to me, but after a few minutes he shifted closer, so that the sides of our legs were touching and I felt his arm drape over my shoulder.

"Is this okay?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah," I whispered back.

After a few more minutes I heard him take in a deep breath and I knew he was about to speak.

"Do you feel like I abandoned you?"

I could hear sadness in his voice.

"No."

"No?"

I shook my head. "How could you have abandoned me when you didn't even know?"

"I should have come after you then. I should have told you what happened, why I...why I was so rough. I should have apologized."

"Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda, Edward. Do you know how often I think about what I should have done?"

He shook his head. I could feel his hand resting on my shoulder as he absentmindedly started rubbing it.

"Every day. More so now, of course, but don't think I didn't question it the whole time."

He didn't respond, he just kept rubbing my shoulder.

"Why were you?" I asked, suddenly aware of what he had actually been saying.

"Why was I what?"

I swallowed. "So rough. What did I do to make you so angry?"

He turned to face me, looking me directly in the eyes. His face was distorted, almost anguished, but he was still so beautiful. "You said 'yes'."

I opened my mouth to ask exactly what that meant, but was interrupted by Rose and Alice bursting out into the backyard.

"Bella, honey, I am so sorry," Rose bellowed as she reached out to pull me up. I was yanked away from Edward's comforting, yet extremely confusing embrace, the blanket tumbling from my lap, and dragged back inside. Just as I got inside the door I turned to see Edward, hunched over, his elbows resting on his knees, hands in his hair.

"Come on, we've banished the boys from the basement. It'll just be us for the rest of the night," Alice chirped.

As much as I wanted to know what Edward was going to tell me, I really needed to just relax, get drunk, and do girly shit. Which is exactly what we did. Four margaritas later and we were all giggling and squealing our way through one of the Saw movies.

XXXXX

The next morning, I woke up with an anvil on my head. At least, that's what it felt like. I groaned and turned over.

"Holy shit."

"Shhhh," Alice whispered, one hand on her temple, the other lazily pressed against her lips. "It's not polite to yell."

"I wasn't yelling."

"Shhhh," she repeated.

"Can someone kill me right now?" Rose rasped.

"Me first," I pleaded.

I heard deep throaty chuckling and I sat up painfully. My whole body ached and I could smell the alcohol seeping out of my pores.

I stretched my body and rubbed my eyes before even attempting to see who was mocking us. When I was finally able to focus on the form I groaned.

"Shut the fuck up, Emmett."

"I'm sorry toots, but you all just look absolutely amazing this morning."

I looked over at Alice, whose hair was sticking up in a thousand different directions. Her eyes were only half open, mascara smeared across her face, underneath her eyes, and she was smacking her mouth like she was tasting something horrible. Then I looked at Rose. Her hair was fine in the front, but when she turned to look at her husband, I could see the rats nest of tangles in the back. She too had mascara caked on her face. I started laughing. It started out as a giggle, but the more I looked at them, the less I could control myself. Within about 30 seconds I was practically rolling on the floor in hysterics.

Alice threw a pillow at my head and I laughed even harder. "Oh my fucking God," I gasped.

"What are you laughing at, Bitch?" Rose scowled.

"Look...look at Alice," I snorted.

Alice turned to face Rose and, of course, Rose burst out laughing.

"Oh my God, what is so funny," Alice screeched before grabbing at her head in pain. "Oh, oh, oh, that hurt."

"Now go look in the mirror."

Rose stood up and faced the giant mirror that hung behind the pool table. "Well fuck," she huffed before sitting back down. "Can I just tell you how peachy fucking keen you look this morning yourself, Bella."

"No, no, I don't wanna know," I laughed.

"Like I said," Emmett teased again. "Absolutely amazing."

"What's amazing?" I heard Jasper's voice ask, a split second before he appeared in the doorway. "Oh, my. Wow."

"Oh be quiet," Alice grumped. "It's not like you've never seen me like this before."

"Oh, no baby, this is something entirely different. Plus, the three of you together make the effect so entirely..."

"Hair raising?" I heard _his_ voice pipe up. But he wasn't in the doorway, he was standing by the bar.

"Ha fucking ha. How long have you been standing there?" I asked.

"I came down with Em. I've been here the whole time," he grinned.

"Fantastic."

Edward approached me and handed me a bottle of water, winking and smirking before he handed one to Alice and then Rose. He held on to Rose's for a second, wrestling with her before she smiled at him and he smiled back. Apparently it was their way of forgiving each other.

_I wish it were that easy for us._

"Oh, Bella, somebody's trying to get their sexting on," Alice giggled as she held up my phone.

I dove for her, landing myself on the sofa, but she dodged me expertly and jumped over the back.

"Baby, I'm thinking of you naked," Alice grinned.

"Well that's fabulous Alice, but I don't swing that way, please give me back my phone."

I heard the chime again.

"My bed or yours, don't really care as long as you're underneath me, or on top of me."

I dove for her again and she danced away.

Rose was snickering. Alice stood next to her and showed her the phone just as it chimed another message.

"You make me so hard I can't stand it," Rose said breathily.

I shook my head and laughed. Another chime.

"Please tell me you're coming up to suck my..."

"Okay then," Emmett interrupted. "I certainly don't need to hear any more thank you."

"Me neither," Edward growled as he did an about face and ran up the stairs.

"What's got his panties in a bunch?" Rose asked.

I saw both Emmett and Alice shoot her a look.

"Well I don't care if he's got a hard on for Bella, he doesn't need to act like such a bitch."

I choked on my water. "He does not have a hard on for me."

"Okay, sure," Rose said bluntly. "In any case, I thought you said the boy couldn't talk dirty."

"He can't. He can occasionally text dirty, but that one right there was about as good as it gets."

"Well at least he tries," Alice smiled sweetly.

"That he does."

Alice handed me my phone sheepishly. "Sorry," she mouthed.

"It's okay. I'm going to go get myself cleaned up."

I showered quickly, but thoroughly. I had to get as much of the alcohol smell off me as possible. I went through nearly all the research articles I had read and could remember just so that I wouldn't think about what Rose had said. I was fairly successful. When I came back out, Alice, Rose, Jasper and Emmett were sitting down watching television and eating stacks of pancakes.

"Mom has yours in the warming drawer upstairs," Emmett said with a mouthful of food.

I scrunched up my nose as a bit of pancake tumbled from his lips. "Thanks."

When I got to the kitchen, Esme was nowhere to be seen. Edward, however, was sitting at the island, talking quietly to Charlie, who was perched next to him with his own small pancake drenched in maple syrup.

"Good morning, baby boy," I greeted, kissing Charlie's temple.

"Hi, Mommy."

"Have you been good for Gramma this morning?"

He nodded his head and shoved a forkful into his mouth. I glanced at Edward and he was readily ignoring me, sipping on his coffee and pretending to read the newspaper.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I'm fine," he snapped.

I was a little taken aback. What the fuck had I done?

"Obviously not. Can we talk for a minute?"

"I said I'm fine."

I grabbed his elbow, wrapping my fingers around it and tugged on him.

"Edward?"

He looked down at my fingers and then up at my face. I darted my eyes towards Charlie and Edward huffed loudly before sliding off the stool. When we got into the other room he yanked his arm from my grasp.

"What is the matter with you?" I asked.

"You really dragged me out here to ask me a question that I already answered?"

"You're being an asshole."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are. I don't understand what I did."

"You never understand Bella. Maybe if you paid more attention to people around you, you'd fucking get it."

I gaped at him. "What?"

"Just fucking forget it okay. It's obviously not worth it."

He walked out, leaving me completely and utterly bewildered. I didn't see him the rest of the morning.

XXXXX

When we got home that afternoon I immediately pulled out my phone to text Riley.

**Me: What's your schedule like this week?**

**Riley: Same as usual. Why? What's up?**

**Me: That doesn't help.**

**Riley: Class on Tues/Thurs PM. Work Tues/Thurs/Fri nights.**

**Me: Want some company Monday?**

**Riley: Of course baby, I have all day.**

**Me: I'll be there at ten.**

I knew that I needed to clear things up with Riley, but I was selfish. He was my constant. He was dependable and loving. I never had to worry about whether or not I pissed him off, because even when I did, he never really fought back.

I pushed back the guilt that maybe I was running to him to forget about the argument with Edward. I called Esme and asked her if she would be able to babysit all day on Monday so that I could run up to Seattle. She readily agreed. She apparently never scheduled meetings on Mondays so that everyone could adjust back to work from the weekend. Smart lady. If she hadn't been able to, I would have taken Charlie with me. I wasn't necessarily looking for sex, I just missed Riley. I missed the comfort and stability that he provided me.

Sunday, I spent with Charlie, watching pre-season football, reading, playing in the treehouse and even doing some cleaning.

Early Monday morning, I opened the door to find Esme with a bag full of arts and crafts. Charlie was still asleep so I just hopped in my car and made the three and a half hour drive to Seattle. I got there a few minutes before ten. Riley was waiting for me. He welcomed me into his bachelor pad with open arms and we spent the next four hours naked. I didn't ask him if there had been other girls. I didn't really want to know. We had an agreement. As long as we both were safe, we were free to do as we wished.

Of course, Riley had the better end of that deal, knowing full well that I was not in the habit of picking up men. Demetri would have been the first since Riley and I started sleeping together, and although I wasn't sure I'd ever admit it to him, Edward's interruption had been a blessing in disguise. The last thing I needed in my life was another one night stand and I hadn't seen or heard from Demetri at all since that night.

Needless to say, Riley was not happy about me moving into the Cullen's place.

"Come on, Bella, that is a really bad idea," he groaned.

"Why?"

"Because you're going to be living with the asshole who has made your life a living hell for the past five weeks. Do you really think he's going to change and be all super-daddy just because you live there?"

"I'm not going to be living there, Riley. It's my own apartment."

"Yeah, right."

"And no, I don't think he's going to be a 'super-daddy'," I said using my fingers to emphasize the quote. "But he's trying. He's making an effort. He can still be a jerk to me sometimes, but he's been great to Charlie."

"Wonderful. So all's forgiven then?"

"It's not about forgiving anymore. It's about trying to figure out what's best for Charlie. Please let's not argue about this today. I want to relax and hang out and just be us. You know it's not going to be this way forever, let's make the most of it while we can."

"Okay," Riley nodded sadly, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and drawing me close. He didn't question what I meant. I guess I didn't really expect him too, but I was hoping that he would so that I could come clean. I was too chicken-shit to do it any other way. I think Riley was in just as much denial as I was about what was going on between us.

The rest of the afternoon was free of Edward talk. We went out to an early dinner and then said goodbye with a chaste kiss and a promise to call when I got home safely.

XXXXX

When I got back to Forks, Charlie was asleep in his bed and Esme was knitting on the sofa, watching the Food Network.

"Hello Dear, did you have a good time?" she smirked knowingly.

I nodded and I could feel myself blush. "It was good, thank you. Riley and I don't get to see very much of each other these days."

She set down her knitting and patted the sofa seat next to her. I sat down a little timidly, my hands fiddling with each other in my lap.

"Can I ask you something?" Esme said gently.

"Sure."

"Can you tell me a bit about Riley?"

I bit my lip nervously. "What would you like to know?"

"Well, you seem to care about him. I just...if he's a part of your life and Charlie's life, then I'd like for him to be a part of our life. You're family, Bella. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable bringing him around."

I sighed. "It's not that I don't feel comfortable bringing him around _you_ Esme, but I'm not so sure that Edward would be so accommodating."

"Do you love him?"

I tilted my head at her in confusion.

"Riley, do you love him?"

"Yes, but not in a 'he is my forever' way."

"No?"

I shook my head.

"Why not?"

"I don't know, I just don't feel it. I love him because he's always been there for me. He's taken care of me; he loves Charlie. He's my best friend."

"Does he know that?"

"I...I don't think so. I don't know."

Esme's eyes were warm so I knew that her next sentence wasn't meant to be hurtful, but it still hurt.

"That's not fair to him, Bella. If he's in love with you, and you can't return his feelings, you need to tell him."

I dragged my hands from my lap and rubbed my eyes with my fingertips. "I know."

"Do you?"

"I've known for a long time. I never should have let it get to the point it has. I never should have let it become more intimate, but... I'm twenty-two years old. I want what everyone else has. I want someone who will love me and cherish me. Men my age aren't looking to get into a relationship with someone like me."

"What do you mean by that."

"I've got a kid Esme. And as good a kid as he is, he still throws temper tantrums and makes a mess. He's loud and rambunctious. He's a lot of responsibility. What kind of guy is willing to take that on?"

"Carlisle and I fell in love when I was a single mother of three kids. He was willing to take that on and he's the most amazing man I've ever known.

"Yes, but I have Edward. He can be volatile and unpredictable. He's wonderful one minute and a complete asshole the next."

"Yes, he's a lot like his father in that way," she sighed.

"Do you think Carlisle would have been involved if Edward Sr. was still there, even if you were divorced or separated?"

"I honestly can't tell you the answer to that Bella. I would like to think so, but we'll never know. You can't think about the 'what ifs' of the past; not when you can't change the outcome."

I had a feeling we weren't talking about her anymore, but I let it go because I was a coward, and didn't want this discussion to turn into something else entirely.

"You shouldn't base your life and your relationships on fear sweetheart. Follow your heart, if Riley's not it, then you need to let go; for both your sakes."

I tried to take in her words, but it's never that easy.

"Can you do me a favor, Bella?"

"Yes, of course. What do you need?"

"I'd like a copy of the photos you have of Charlie," she said handing me a small flash drive. "Can you put them on there and drop them off at the house tomorrow?"

I smiled, thankful that she was leaving the previous topic. "Sure. Where do you want me to leave it?"

She handed me something else, a key. "This is yours. You'll need it just in case. It's a key to the main house. Use it tomorrow. You know the mail organizer that's in the kitchen?"

I nodded.

"That's probably our safest bet."

"Okay."

Esme stood up and started packing away her knitting. "I should probably get back home. Thank you for asking me to watch him, Bella. I hope that I'll get to do it more often."

"How was he?"

"An angel, of course," she cooed.

"Of course, he saves his demon tendencies for me," I laughed.

"Oh please, that child could never be a demon. Never, ever," she teased, knowing full well that even the sweetest of children had their moments.

I had to admit though, I had it fairly easy. I had seen the way some of the kids acted at daycare.

Esme leaned in and kissed my cheek softly. "Will we see you this week?"

"Um, I don't know. Probably. I'll have to talk to Edward and see what his plans are. He's mad at me for some reason, but maybe we can do dinner."

Esme smiled softly. "Well, just let me know dear."

XXXXX

At around noon on Tuesday, I finally got motivated to move my ass and drop Esme's flash drive off at the house. When we got there, Charlie hopped out of his seat and followed me in. I paused briefly when I realized that I didn't need to use the key because the door was already unlocked.

_That's weird. _

I opened the door and froze solid.

XXXXXX

**AN: Ohhhhh, no she didn't. Oh yes I did. This was the absolute best place to cut it. I am sorry for the cliffie, especially b/c we didn't get to either the moving in or the trouble. But...all you have to do is wait for Saturday. It will be posted bright and early MST.**

**And I suppose I should also apologize for truth-blocking you all too. Or maybe Alice and Rose should. Edward was almost there. Almost. LOL.**

**Now, as for reviews. Review today or tomorrow and you'll get a teaser for Part II. **


	15. Two Steps Back: Part 2

**AN: UNBELIEVABLE RESPONSE. I had 180 reviews by the end of posting day and well over 200 now. That's more than any of the other chapters have gotten in a whole week. I love to write anyway, but you all really do make this worthwhile for me. I bow down in thanx to you for letting me know what's on your minds. There were a couple of you who wanted teasers, but you weren't logged in. I had no way of getting them to you, I'm sorry. :-(**

**I have no idea how you guys are going to react to this chapter. So many different people are having so many different reactions. This part will probably really frustrate you, but please understand that this was part of the plan from the very beginning. This event is a catalyst for both of them. BIG changes are afoot.**

**Thank you to the usual suspects**

**Characters aren't mine, yada, yada, yada.**

**On with the show:**

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 13: Two Steps Back Part II

BPOV

My mouth dropped open. Edward was sitting on the sofa in the front room. His head was thrown back, his eyes were closed and he was moaning. Loudly. His hands rested on the head of a girl, whose face was in the vicinity of his dick. Her head bobbed up and down rhythmically over him.

_Motherfucker_

"Edward!" I screeched. I turned, just as Charlie was entering the house and covered his eyes.

Edward startled and nearly hit the ceiling and the girl on her knees in front of him yanked her head away from his lap, falling backwards onto her ass. His eyes darted to mine and then quickly to where my hands were.

"Oh Shit," he yelped, quickly covering himself before standing up and buttoning his pants.

It was then that I glanced as the girl, who was giving me a somewhat amused and snide smirk. Jessica Stanley.

"Bella, I…."

I couldn't even look at him. I was fuming. I could feel the anger radiating throughout my whole body. My hands started shaking violently as I continued to hide Charlie from the scene in front of us. Luckily he had been behind me, but I honestly didn't know if he had seen anything.

I whipped around, taking Charlie with me and stormed out the door. I couldn't believe what I had just walked in on, in the living room. Granted, it wasn't my house but Jesus Christ, isn't that what people have bedrooms for? It was then that I noticed the faded old Toyota Corolla parked up the side of between the side of the house and the garage. Edward was right, I really needed to start paying attention to what was going on around me. Not that I recognized the car, but maybe if I had noticed it, I would have knocked.

I could hear his footsteps behind us as I tried to hurry back to my car.

"Bella wait," he pleaded, reaching out and grabbing my shoulder firmly enough that I had to stop. I turned quickly, letting go of Charlie in the process, to face Edward.

"I don't want to hear it. We can talk about this later when there are no little ears to hear us," I spit.

I'm not gonna lie, underneath the shock, anger and disgust, was a little bit of jealousy. I knew it was unreasonable. I had just gotten back from visiting Riley. I had no right to be jealous. It didn't matter that there were so many bitter emotions between us, there was still something about him that I couldn't resist. He was beautiful and infuriating. Cocky and Complicated. Smart and sometimes even sweet. It drove me crazy, in both good and bad ways. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Jessica in the doorway, leaning against the frame, reapplying some lip gloss, and not even trying to hide her grin.

"Fucking cow," I growled and turned to leave. Charlie was ahead of me, pulling the car door open and climbing into his seat. Edward sighed behind me and then I heard his retreating footsteps right before he snapped.

"Get the fuck out, Jessica."

"What?" she trilled.

"I said go home."

"But Eddie, we were just getting started," she whined.

"I don't give a shit. Get out."

"Jesus, Eddie, I don't get it. It's not that big of a deal, let's just go to your bedroom."

I wasn't looking at them, but I was certainly listening.

"First of all, stop calling me Eddie. Second of all, you will never, ever see the inside of my bedroom so get the thought out of your head right now. Lastly, I just got caught by my three-year-old son and his mother getting head, what part don't you understand? It _is_ a big fucking deal. I never should have let you in in the first place. Now go the fuck home!"

I didn't stay to hear anymore. I reached the car, buckled Charlie into his seat and climbed in the driver's seat. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

"Mommy?"

_Oh God, here it comes. I have no idea what I'm going to tell him._

"Yes, sweetie?"

"Can I get a sandbox?"

I inhaled deeply, closed my eyes and pursed my lips together tightly.

_Thank God for the toddler mind track._

"We'll have to ask Papa Carlisle and Gramma Esme, but I bet they'll say okay."

I was trying not to feel too bad about putting Carlisle and Esme on the spot. They had pretty much told me that they would get anything that Charlie needed or wanted for the house. I had been attempting to _not_ to take them up on that out of principal, but right now, I needed to make sure that Charlie's mind stayed away from what had been going on in that house. I was pretty sure that he didn't see anything graphic, because even I couldn't see what was actually going on, but that didn't mean I didn't know.

XXXXX

When I got home I called up my dad and asked him if he could be home a little bit early to look after Charlie. I wanted to get to Edward before the rest of his family got home. I knew that Carlisle wouldn't be home until seven and Esme would probably stop by to see him on her way home. I was pretty sure that Alice and Jasper wouldn't be home until at least six. If Dad could be home by five, it would give me an entire hour.

Dad agreed and I set about making a chicken bake that I could shove into the oven before I left.

When my dad's cruiser finally pulled into the driveway at five past five, I kissed Charlie and bolted out the door.

When I got to the Cullen's house, I knocked on the front door. I didn't care if it was open and I didn't care if I had a key, I had learned my lesson and I would no longer be walking into that house before knocking.

Edward answered the door with a very solemn expression. He led me back to the music room without a word. I assumed that it was probably the most private place we could go other than his bedroom. I was glad that he chose this room because there was no way that I could ever go back into the room where my life changed so drastically.

The second the door snapped shut I couldn't hold it in any longer.

"Christ, Edward! What in God's name made you think that was a good idea?" I asked in a completely frustrated tone. "What would you have done if it had been your mother that walked in instead of us? Was the living room really the best place to get a blow job?"

"How the hell was I to know that you'd break into my house in the middle of the day?"

"I didn't break into your freaking house. The door was unlocked. Your mother asked me to drop off a flash drive for her."

"Well I didn't know that. I'm fucking sorry, okay? It's not something that was exactly planned. What more do you want?"

"I want you to start thinking about that shit _before _you get caught in the act."

"I'm not accountable to you, Bella. You're not my mother, you're not my wife. You're not even my fucking girlfriend."

I took a deep breath trying to compose myself before I decided that ripping his head off was the best course of action. My teeth ground together and I closed my eyes.

"You're right, I'm not," I breathed out. "But I _am_ the mother of your child and we're getting ready to move in, which means you're going to have your child living practically under your roof. If you can't think about anything other than your dick, how am I supposed to feel comfortable with us living here and you having unsupervised time with him."

"Are you fucking threatening me?" he roared. I flinched at the tone of his voice, but I didn't back down.

"No, I'm not. I'm warning you. I don't really give a shit what you do, but I need to know that you are responsible enough to make sure he doesn't see shit he shouldn't see. I am not willing to risk it."

"You are such a fucking hypocrite. You can go get yourself fucked by your boy toy and I can't even get a fucking blow job? She showed up on the doorstep; she offered, I accepted. I had no idea that anyone would be walking through that door."

My face must have shown my shock that Edward knew where I had been, because he didn't hesitate to call me out.

"Yeah, I know you went to Seattle and left Charlie with my mom. Why the fuck else would you go up there without him if Riley is such an important part of his life?"

I recovered as quickly as I could.

"I'm not a hypocrite," I countered, trying really hard to control my emotions. "Charlie _has_ always and _will_ always come first. I take care of my child day in and day out, love him unconditionally, make sure he eats properly, gets tons of exercise and learns new things. On top of all that I work and up until a few months ago I went to school too. So when I need to release some tension, I make arrangements for him. I have never brought a man into our home other than Riley and he has never seen me do anything inappropriate. You have managed in less than six weeks to do what I never did in over three years, so fuck you!"

"You're trying to tell me you've never had sex where he could accidentally catch you? You shared a fucking bedroom with him since he was born."

_Why am I discussing my sex life with Edward again?_

"Believe it or not, Riley has never spent the night at my apartment. And I used the baby monitor, so if he even stirred, we could hear him. I'm not saying that you can't do it, but please just use your brain. And Jessica Stanley, Edward? She'd blow a fucking tree if it had a dick."

Edward's face was twisted in anger. We were doing nothing but pissing each other off more.

"You can't refuse to let me spend time with him, Bella," he growled. "I'll take you to fucking court if I have to."

And there it was; the threat. The threat that I knew would be coming eventually. The threat that scared the shit out of me, because he had resources that I did not. But I couldn't let him know just how terrified I really was. I wasn't going to let his threat sit there and ferment. He was going to know exactly what would happen if he even tried.

"Great Edward," I snarled. "I'll see you there. I'm sure a judge would love to hear all about the dozens, or is it hundreds? Of women you've fucked and treated like shit afterwards. Or the blowjob you got from the local slut that our son nearly walked in on. Oh, and don't forget about the bruises you left all over my body the night Charlie was conceived?"

"FUCK!" he screamed, at least an octave above his normal voice. "Why the fuck do you keep doing this to me?"

"Don't even think of challenging me Edward. This is not a game that you can play."

"What the hell is going on in here?" Alice hissed as she burst through the door. "I could hear you two yelling at each other from outside."

_So much for privacy. I guess it's a mute point when you're screaming._

"Nothing!" Edward snapped.

"Oh, now you're embarrassed about it?" I scoffed, turning to Alice. "Charlie and I just walked in on your brother getting a blowjob from Jessica Stanley in the middle of the living room," I told her, glaring at Edward as I spoke.

"Shut the fuck up, Bella," Edward growled.

"Oh my God, are you serious?" Alice cried out, her mouth gaping at Edward.

"Edward?"

Edward's hands were in his hair, tugging roughly.

"Look, I didn't know anyone was going to come in," he tried to explain.

"Jessica? Edward, do you know how many men she's been with since we left? She's like the state of Washington's bicycle. Everyone has taken a ride. Ewww gross."

"You don't know that." Edward mumbled.

"Oh please. It's not like she wasn't a hooker back in high school. Do you honestly believe anything would change? Angela Weber said that Jessica told her that the reason she got a job at that free clinic was because she was there every week either getting tested or getting the morning after pill. She apparently seems proud of the fact that she sleeps with a different guy practically every week. I hope you're going to go get tested."

I looked over at Edward. His mouth was set in a grimace and I saw him shudder.

"Oh Edward, please tell me you haven't slept with her since we got back?" Alice begged.

"God no. I've been fighting her off for weeks. She showed up at the house and practically begged me to let her do it. I got tired of fighting, it just fucking happened."

"You do know you can get herpes from blowjobs right?" Alice asked earnestly. " I mean, even if you don't see any sores, they can still be in her mouth."

Edward's eyes widened and his eyebrows looked like they were trying to disappear into his hair.

"I…I…I know that dammit. I just...Arrgg, I didn't even think about it," he stuttered.

"There seems to be a lot of shit you're not thinking about these days," Alice quipped before throwing her hand over her mouth. "I'm sorry Edward, I didn't mean for that to come out. It's really, none of my business," she said sadly.

"No, Alice, it's not, but it's never stopped any of you from butting in before, why start now?" Edward asked sarcastically. "In any case, she said she was clean. She only had her mouth on me for like ten seconds before Bella came in."

I couldn't help, but laugh and Edward glared at me.

"I'm sorry, but it's funny. You want to go to medical school? You work in a free clinic, Edward. You see prostitutes and promiscuous teenagers every day and you didn't think about the diseases you can get from a blowjob?"

He groaned.

The room was eerily silent for a few minutes before Alice spoke again. "How did Charlie react?" Alice asked in a timid voice.

"He didn't say anything and I'm afraid to ask. I'm just hoping that he either didn't see anything or he's too young to realize what was happening."

Alice sighed and nodded. "Do you think it's better to just pretend that it didn't happen?"

"I don't know. We've talked about keeping private parts private, but that's about it. I'm pretty sure putting your genitals in someone else's mouth is not considered keeping them private though."

Edward's hands were covering his face and he rubbed his temples roughly.

"I….I didn't mean for him to see that," he said, almost inaudibly. "I, Jesus, could I have fucked him up?"

He looked up at me and I could see a pained expression on his face. I took in a deep breath, pulling my lip into my mouth and biting down. My anger began to fade. He hadn't meant for this to happen. I knew that. Riley's company provided me with comfort, but what did Edward have? He was going through just as much, if not more, than I was. I still believed he shouldn't have done it in the middle of the living room, and not with that skank, but I couldn't blame him for seeking out a release.

"I don't think you've permanently scarred him Edward. At least you weren't fucking her. I honestly don't think he saw anything, but he could have. Just….you just gotta think about shit like that before you do it."

Alice looked between Edward and I for a second and excused herself quietly. This was something that Edward and I would have to work out together, by ourselves.

As soon as the door clicked shut, Edward sat down on the piano bench and I took a seat on the leather sofa.

"Oh God, Bella, I'm so sorry," he breathed. "I wasn't thinking. At all."

I looked at him and saw that his asshole persona was gone. He looked so defeated.

"I'm not good at this fatherhood shit. I don't know how to put anyone else first," he sighed. "How….how did you do it?"

"How did I do what?" I asked softly.

"Give it all up? Reign it in?"

I chuckled. He really had no idea what it was like for me. "I didn't have much of choice, Edward. No one wants to mess with a pregnant chick. I didn't have any friends to go out and be crazy with. I didn't have any boyfriends to screw around with. I couldn't drink, or party, or have a normal college experience. I sat at home and I studied. I went to school and I went to work. When he was born, there was nothing for me to really give up."

"Nothing?" he gaped at me.

I shook my head. "Not really. I mean I gave up a consistent sleeping pattern and I gave up on getting a shower every day, but that was about it. I didn't go out until he was over a year old. Riley looked after him when I went out on dates, but I never had any real relationships."

Edward frowned. "Why not?"

I quirked an eyebrow at him. "What twenty-year-old do you know wants to date a chick with a baby that isn't his?"

"What about Riley?"

"Riley's different. We already cared so much about each other. It wasn't always easy for him to be my friend. I was hormonal. One minute I was a raging bitch and the next I was a blubbering mess. I think he was just tired of watching me go out with guys who we both knew were in it to get laid and nothing more. They never intended to be a part of my life. We'd hook up for a few weeks and then we'd move on. I think Riley took pity on me."

"How valiant of him," Edward sneered. "Must have been such a chore."

I rolled my eyes. "You haven't even met him Edward. He's a good person. He's given up a lot for me."

"How do you know _he_ wasn't...isn't, just in it to get laid?"

"If that's all he wanted, he would have run away screaming the second I told him I was pregnant. But he didn't. He stayed. He took care of me."

I saw another flash of pain cross Edward's beautiful features. He closed his eyes and swallowed thickly.

We didn't speak for a long time. Edward gazed at the floor and I leaned my head back and stared at the ceiling.

"I've got to get back to Charlie and my dad," I said at last. I had been there for over an hour.

"Hopefully he took dinner out of the over, otherwise, we're screwed."

"Oh. Okay," Edward said dejectedly.

I stood to leave the music room and had just reached the door when I heard him call me.

"Bella?"

I turned slightly to face him, but didn't respond.

"Are you really not going to let me spend time with him?"

The look on Edward's face was almost like that of a child who was being punished.

"I didn't say you couldn't spend time with him, Edward. I just need to know that when you're with him, that you'll think about him first. That you won't put him in situations that he's too young to handle."

He nodded in understanding. "I, uh, I'm sorry about threatening you," he mumbled towards the floor.

"We'll see you tomorrow," I assured.

It wasn't my intent to ignore his apology. I would have loved to tell him that it was okay, but it wasn't. Just him mentioning taking Charlie away meant that he had thought about it. Until we built up some kind of trust, I would continue to worry.

With that in mind, all I wanted to do was get home to my baby.

XXXXX

When I got back to the house, I found my dad and Charlie cuddled up on the sofa watching Toy Story. I could smell the chicken bake that I had made and noticed that it was sitting on the stove.

"Did you guys eat?" I asked.

"Yep. I didn't know when you'd be back and I figured that I might as well get this guy fed and pajama'd; make things a little easier for you."

"Thanks, Dad," I said as I dished a portion of the bake into a bowl and slid it into the microwave.

"Did you take care of everything that you needed to?" he asked with his eyebrows raised.

I hadn't told my dad exactly what happened. He already wasn't a big fan of Edward's and he didn't need any more ammunition. I simply told him that Edward had made some poor decisions that affected Charlie and it was something we needed to discuss.

"Yeah. I think he understands now."

I grabbed my dinner and sat down on the sofa on the other side of Charlie. I curled my feet under me and dug in. We sat in silence until Charlie fell asleep about twenty minutes before the movie ended. My dad lifted him and started to take him down the hallway.

"I can do that Dad."

"It's okay, Bells. I don't get to do this that often and I kind of like tucking the little guy in."

XXXXX

The rest of the week went by with very little word from Edward. He called to talk to Charlie on Wednesday, but by Thursday morning I had a vomiting child on my hands so we had to skip the park.

Charlie was miserable. He rarely ever got sick, but when he did, he got REALLY sick. He was running a fever of 103.4 and couldn't keep anything down for a good twelve hours. All he did was lie down on the sofa watching cartoons and sleeping. I, of course, had the dilemma of giving him Tylenol, which would make him feel so much better that he would want to bounce around, or let the fever do what it was supposed to do. I decided to let nature take it's course.

When I called Edward to let him know we wouldn't be meeting him, he asked if there was anything he could do.

"No," I sighed. "It'll be fine."

"Are you sure, Bella? I mean, I can come look at him."

"I'm looking at him right now, Edward," I laughed humorlessly. "He's not doing anything interesting."

"That's not what I meant," he groaned.

"All he needs is to sleep. If you come over here, he's going to get all riled up."

"Alright, well call if you need anything. Uh, if Charlie needs anything."

I assured him that I would before hanging up.

Thursday night, Carlisle stopped by to check on him only to tell me what I already knew. Keep him hydrated as much as possible and let him rest. It was most likely a virus and there wasn't a whole lot we could do for him.

By Friday morning, Charlie was feeling much better, but we isolated ourselves anyway to make sure that everything was clear. Again, Edward called to see how Charlie was feeling, but he seemed distracted and I was irritated so we got off the phone fairly quick.

Saturday morning, I awoke early, just as the sun was starting to peak out through the trees. Charlie was still snoring softly next to me. I watched his gentle breaths as his chest rose and fell. His long eyelashes fluttered softly against the tops of his cheeks. He was facing me and I wrapped my arm around him to pull him closer. He stirred briefly before nuzzling into the warmth of my body and then resumed snoring.

I wondered if that moment would be the last time that we would cuddle so closely. Would he love having his own room so much that he never snuggled up to me at night again? I hadn't seen what Alice and Esme had done to Charlie's new room, but I knew it would be elaborate. They probably made it the epitome of a child's dream bedroom and I would lie awake at nights all by myself, cold and lonely.

I sighed deeply before finally getting up and making my way to the bathroom. I showered quickly and dressed and then headed down to the kitchen. My dad, of course, was there drinking his coffee and reading over the newspaper.

"Morning, Bells. You all set?"

I yawned. "Sure, Dad. I'm as ready as I'm going to be."

I poured myself a cup of coffee and sat down across from him.

Silence.

The sound of rustling newspaper as the pages were turned.

The sipping sounds as our coffee was consumed.

More silence.

I felt my eyes welling up with tears as I contemplated if we would ever enjoy such non-communication again.

My father looked up at me and it was as if he could read my mind.

"You can come back any time you want, Bella," he smiled.

I sniffed. "I know, Daddy."

Paper turning, sipping coffee, silence.

"You'll only be ten minutes away."

I nodded. "Uh huh."

He set the newspaper down, took one last sip of his coffee and got up to put it in the sink.

"Do you need any help moving your things?"

I shook my head. " Alice is coming over in…." I looked at my watch, "thirty-five minutes to help me pack up some boxes and Emmett and Jasper are going to move it all. We don't have very much to move."

"I know," my dad sighed. "Are you going to take the boxes in the basement? The ones from Seattle?"

"Yeah, those have all my kitchen supplies in them. I don't know how much I'll need though. I think Esme and Alice bought stock in Bed, Bath, and Beyond." I laughed. "If I don't need them, I'll just put them in the storage closet until the next time we move."

My dad looked at me and smiled softly.

"Go to work, Dad. I expect you back in time for dinner at our place tomorrow night though," I demanded with a smile.

My dad chuckled. "I'll be there."

Forty-five minutes later, Alice showed up on my doorstep looking completely disheveled.

"What the hell happened to you? You're ten minutes late." I teased.

Alice smiled sheepishly.

"Nevermind! I do not want to know." I laughed.

"Have I ever told you the amazing things Jasper can do with his…"

"La la la la la la la," I sang as I stuck my fingers in my ears."

Alice giggled and grabbed my hand, dragging me up to my room.

"Where's Charlie?" Alice chirped.

"I'm right here," Charlie piped up from behind her, sufficiently scaring the crap out of her.

"Jake is picking him up in about twenty minutes to take him to First Beach for the day. He's going to introduce him to Claire," I said wiggling my eyebrows.

"Claire?"

"Yeah, she's Sam Uley's cousin. Jake's had the hots for her for about a year and finally got the courage to ask her out a few weeks ago," I explained as I knelt down to throw some books into a box.

"God, how do you go that long having the hots for someone and not acting on it?" Alice scowled. "That's like pure tort…..ure."

I looked up at Alice when she stumbled over her words. Alice never stumbled over her words.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing. Never mind," she almost whimpered.

I knew she was lying, but I didn't bother to call her out on it. She would tell me if it were really important.

"You don't really have much stuff do you?" Alice said, effectively changing the subject.

"No, not really."

"Well then, it should be easy to get you moved in," she smiled. "I'm super excited for you to see."

"Alice," I groaned. "I hope you didn't do too much."

"Nope. Most of the furniture is the same, but everything got a new coat of paint and Charlie's room is completely new."

_Just as I feared, he's never going to ever cuddle with me again._

"That's great Alice," I said trying to sound excited. I was so appreciative, I really was. I was just having one of those mornings. Scratch that, one of those weeks.

Jake picked up Charlie and it took Alice and me not even two hours to pack up two boxes of books, four boxes of toys, five boxes of clothes, and two boxes of miscellaneous shit. My whole life packed into thirteen boxes give or take. We pulled up three boxes of stuff from the basement that I wasn't sure I was going to need. When we were done, Jasper and Emmett drove over in Jasper's Ford F-150 and packed all the boxes in the bed. Edward was nowhere in sight.

"Is this all ya got, Bella?" Emmett asked as he surveyed the load.

"Uh, yeah. I guess so."

I was more than just a little bit embarrassed. I was twenty-two years old, almost twenty-three. I was a college graduate, a research assistant and a mother. Shouldn't I have owned more stuff?

"Well good, cause there's a shitload of stuff already in that apartment. Any more than this and you'd have to find a bigger place," Emmett teased as he shoved my shoulder a little.

I knew he could sense my discomfort and I appreciated the effort to try and make me feel better.

I drove with Alice as we followed the boys back to the Cullen's house. Esme and Carlisle were standing outside waiting for us. Esme was literally bouncing and Carlisle's smile could have lit up a football stadium.

"Ohhhhhh, I'm so excited," Esme squealed as I got out of the car. She hugged me tightly and rubbed my back. I tried not to look around-to look for _him_. He had never offered to help me move. I convinced myself I didn't care. I was doing this because I wanted to; because I _needed_ to. Charlie needed this, Esme and Carlisle needed this. Edward could throw his little fit if he wanted to.

Esme wrapped her arm around my shoulder. "He was going to stay and help, but he said he had something that he needed to do in Port Angeles. He'll be back later on this afternoon."

I nodded, slightly annoyed that I hadn't been as inconspicuous as I had thought. I didn't even want to think about what, or who, was occupying his time this morning. He could do whatever he wanted. As long as Charlie wasn't affected, it was none of my business.

I entered the apartment hesitantly with my eyes squinted. I was almost afraid to look. But I didn't really have much to fear. As I began to look around I noticed that all of the furniture remained the same, just as Alice had said. The walls were now a light mocha color as opposed to the cream they had been before. The curtains were a cream and maroon color. And the dining room table had a runner to match. There were bits and pieces of decoration that accented the colors amazingly well.

Above the fireplace was a photo. It was a blown up shot of my face as I stared down at Charlie. He couldn't have been more than a few months old and his little fingers were wrapped around my thumb.

I stood in front of the photo, taking in a shaky breath.

"How…..I mean, where did you get this?" I asked in a choked voice. I had never seen this photo before.

Alice placed her hand on my shoulder. "Angela gave it to me. She said she took it at her house that first summer you came home with Charlie. I saw her at the hospital when I was visiting Dad last Monday and happened to mention that you were moving into the apartment and we were decorating it. I asked her if she had any photos from over the years and she e-mailed them to me. There's a few of them," she smiled.

I felt my eyes burning and squeezed them shut tightly. As I did, I could feel the tears that had been threatening, finally escaping and slipping down my cheeks. I sniffled and wiped them away with my fingers.

"Thank you," I sighed.

"Come on, let's look at the rest of the place."

I followed Alice through the rest of the rooms, which were decorated in complimentary shades of creams and beiges and browns. When Alice took me into the master bedroom, I almost stopped breathing. The walls were a pale sage color and were covered in photos. The four poster bed was still in the center of the room and was covered in a cream, sage, and blue comforter with matching and accenting pillows. There was a huge chair in the corner, not quite a loveseat, but much bigger than a normal chair. It was perched in front of a big picture window that overlooked the back garden. On either side of the chair, against the wall stood floor to ceiling bookcases. The En Suite, which had not only a huge Jacuzzi tub, but also a separate shower closet, was decorated in the same colors, but with blue walls and sage and cream towels. Above the tub was a black and white photo of Charlie at about eighteen months sitting in an aluminum bucket. His bare legs were dangling and his face was covered in dirt. I laughed out loud as I recognized that one from the collection that I had given Esme on the flash drive.

_So that's what she wanted them for._

The spare room hadn't been changed much, just a coat of paint to match the rest of the apartment. Alice stopped me as I was about to reach for the knob of Charlie's bedroom.

"This is my favorite room," she grinned cheekily. I opened the door and my heart leapt up into my throat.

_Oh. My. God._

Out of control would have been an understatement. It was jungle themed. Someone had painted a mural of vines and trees on each wall. There was a loft bed made to look like a freaking treehouse. It wasn't very high though, maybe about four feet off the ground. I would easily be able to put him in there. It was completely boxed in and there were windows and a little door at the end that led to an actual staircase, not a ladder, a staircase, with railings and everything.

The fan, which hung from the middle of the room, was a medium colored wood that matched the treehouse and the light cover was a bright red flower.

The bottom part of the loft was covered by a linen type fabric that had strategically placed holes. Inside was a beanbag and a bookshelf and there was a smaller version of the flower overhead light that had been installed on the underside of the bed. There was a gigantic gorilla perched in the corner of the room and a stuffed snake curled around the post of the bed.

He had a dresser that also matched the wood of the bed and the fan and a walk in closet with a complete organizing system. There were, of course, places for hanging clothes, shelves for folding clothes and cubbies for shoes, but on the other side of the closet were cubes with bins in them that were each labeled. There were bins for toy cars, stuffed animals, and action figures. There was a shelf labeled games and another labeled puzzles. Here's the real kicker, they were all already filled. Not completely, but close enough.

I stood with my mouth completely agape. I was literally stunned into silence.

"Do you like it?" Alice asked timidly.

"Holy shit," I finally whispered.

"Is that a yes?"

"Once he enters this room, I'm never going to see him again."

I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. The room had to have cost a fucking fortune. Alice either read my mind, or else I said it out loud, because she started shaking her head.

"It wasn't that much. I had a few design students from UW come down. We supplied the materials and the schematics and they custom build and painted everything for free. They did it as part of a summer project that they were working on."

"Charlie's gonna shit."

Alice giggled.

"Well, that's it," Emmett bellowed from the other room. "Last box is inside. What goes where?"

I directed the clothes to each bedroom and the books to my room. The three kitchen boxes went to a closet by the laundry room, since I probably wouldn't be needing them, and the toys and miscellaneous stuff I let stay in the living room.

"Um, can I have a few minutes?" I asked after everyone was finished.

"Yeah, of course," Alice said with a soft smile.

When the apartment was empty except for me, I sat down on the sofa and cried.

**XXXXXXX**

**AN: Do you even want to know how many reviews I got begging me not to have Edward make that mistake with Jessica? LOL. I almost felt guilty for letting it happen...Almost. It could have been worse though right? *hides behind couch***

**Okay, I don't know who you all are going to be angry with. B, E, both, neither. I know that some will be pissed at Bella b/c they see her as hypocritical, but remember, she admitted that he had every right to do what he wanted. And yes, some of that anger was just the tip of her jealousy poking out. We are FINALLY getting her to go to that place. And some are probably really pissed off at Edward for going that route, but as much as he is making an attempt to change his behavior, sometimes, stressful situations have you falling back into old habits. Sometimes you have to take a couple of steps back before you can move forward again. I do recommend you wait until you hear his point of view though.**

******Edward recognizes his feelings and has admitted them to not only himself, but at least two other members of his family. Bella does not and it's going to take a huge leap of faith for her to do that.**  


**I promise you, that what you are looking for is coming very soon. Both Bella's talk with Riley and Edward's reveal. And I can tell you, he reveals both what happened with him that night and his true feelings at the same time. We have to give them a little time to recoop from this situation first.**

**Next week: Wonder what Edward just HAD to do in Port Angeles? AND Chief Swan finally gets his day with Edward. **

**As always, Reviewers will get teasers. PLEASE sign in if you want one. THANX**


	16. Peace and Revenge

**AN: Another long one guys. I had an emotional weekend so most of this was done on Monday. I got a little carried away. I just didn't want to separate it again. Hopefully this will answer a few questions for you.**

**Thank you to everyone for reading and reviewing. I continue to be blown away by the response. I try to answer every current chapter review so if, for some reason, you don't get a reply with a teaser, PM me. Sometimes I accidentally miss someone. I still had a few of you that wanted teasers and I couldn't get them to you b/c you weren't logged in. I'm so sorry. I do usually put teasers up on the Fictionators as well as on my blog (link on profile). I also post them regularly on Twilighted and smaller ones on Twitter as well.**

**Thank you to Mollie and Mel for doing what you do. I have included in this chapter a little treat for the Twilighted crew. I've been thinking about how to do this for a while now just for you all. This is what I came up with ;o)**

**Stephenie Meyers owns the characters, not copyright infringement intended.**

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 14: Peace and Revenge

EPOV

I walked through the back door of the clinic with my travel coffee mug in my hand

"Good morning, Edward," Dr. Oleander smiled as I went to fill my mug from the fresh pot of coffee sitting on the countertop.

"Good morning. Hey, I'd like to ask a favor," I said sitting down next to him.

"Sure, son, what's up?"

"My little boy's mother, Bella, takes him to the park on Thursday mornings and I was hoping that I could take the time off to go with them."

"Every Thursday?" he asked, peering at me from behind a file.

"Yes?" I asked rather than stated. "He doesn't live with me and I don't get much time with him. I was hoping to change that."

Dr. Oleander's expression softened and the corners of his mouth lifted just slightly.

"You're a volunteer, Edward. I appreciate any time that you can give me. As long as you let me know ahead of time, when possible, when you'd like time off, I'm more than happy to accommodate you."

"I appreciate it," I smiled.

We began going over some of the appointments that had been scheduled for the day and also discussed an outbreak of Chlamydia that had hit Port Angeles High School. We had already seen nearly ten students and were expecting more in the next few days as word got out. The kids wanted to get tested and treated before their parents found out about the outbreak and took them in to their pediatricians. I obviously didn't see these kids, because I wasn't qualified, but I knew which ones were there for testing. It was obvious in their faces.

I saw Heidi walking out of one of the rooms with a sample to be tested and my heart absolutely broke at what I saw when I walked past the open door. A little girl sat on the cold, hard table looking petrified. I grabbed her chart out the pocket and looked at it. She was twelve. Heidi came up behind me.

"It's sad, isn't it? Poor little thing lost her virginity to her fifteen year old boyfriend six weeks ago only to find out he was having sex with at least two other girls. He wasn't even the one to tell her he had Chlamydia, it was one of the other girls."

"Oh shit," I groaned.

"Thought she was in love; thought he loved her back."

"She's just a baby," I whispered.

"Yeah, well, I was fifteen. How old were you?"

"Too young," I admitted.

"Younger than her?"

"God, no, not that young."

"Were you in love?"

"Not with the girl I lost it to."

"Oh, that's really sad, Edward," Heidi frowned.

"Tell me about it."

I set the chart back into the tray and follow Heidi back to the sample room.

"Dr. Oleander's not going to be happy about this."

"Why?"

"That one in there, Bree, is his youngest daughter's best friend."

My jaw dropped. "No shit?"

Heidi nodded.

"Is that why she looks so scared?"

Heidi nodded again. "Well, that and the fact that she may have an STD. She didn't have any other choice. This is the only free clinic in the area. She's afraid that he'll tell her parents."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

About half hour later I was in the hallway outside of the break room when Dr. Oleander stepped out of Bree's room and started walking towards me. He looked about ten years older and was rubbing his hands over his face.

"Sometimes I really hate my job," he sighed as he met my gaze.

"She was positive?"

"Yes."

"Are you doing an HIV as well?"

He nodded. "Her parents are friends of mine. How do I look them in the face and not tell them they need to start talking to their daughter about sex?"

"She's twelve. I doubt they've even considered that they needed to at this point."

"Yes, well, I think it's time my wife and I spoke to Sienna as well."

"That's your youngest?"

"Yes, we have one son and three daughters. We talked to all three of the older kids when they were fifteen; made sure they were on birth control and knew all about STD's and protection. I guess I never anticipated having to do it so early with her, but apparently, I do."

"That kind of sucks," I said stupidly.

Dr. Oleander laughed humorlessly. "Yes, Edward, it does kind of suck."

XXXXX

"Hello, sweetheart," Mom beamed at me as I dragged my exhausted ass into the kitchen.

"Hi," I said, nearly collapsing onto the stool at the island and resting my head on my folded arms.

"You'll never guess who came to visit me today."

I lifted my eyes, but nothing else. "Who?"

"Bella."

I lifted my head. "Really?"

"Yes."

My mother said nothing else. I waited and waited. She was teasing me. She wanted me to say it. She wanted me to ask. And of course, I would do what my mother wanted.

"What did she have to say?"

Mom turned around and smirked at me and I rolled my eyes to let her know that I was not amused, but the smile that escaped kind of ruined the effect.

"She's decided to take the apartment. She's moving in a week from Saturday.

I must have looked like a complete idiot with my mouth hanging open the way it was. Yes, I had told her that I thought it was a good idea, but ten days? Bella and Charlie were going to be living here in ten days? Well, not here, but there. They'd be closer than neighbors.

My leg, which was resting on one of the stool footrests, started shaking nervously. The vibrations caused a loose screw to make a rattling sound, catching my mom's attention.

She gazed down at my leg and then back up at my face.

"Something wrong, sweetheart?" she asked, trying to hide the twitching of her lips.

"No," I practically squeaked.

She laughed. "It will be good for you, Edward. All of you."

"I asked Dr. Oleander to give me Thursday mornings off," I admitted. "So that I could go to the park."

"Oh, that's wonderful dear. I know that Charlie will love that. I'm afraid that I won't be able to make it for the next few weeks."

"Why?"

"I have a client in Seattle who can only do Thursday morning meetings. We've scheduled one every Thursday for the next month to get the planning completed."

"What about Dad?"

"I believe he's tied up tomorrow as well, but you'll have to ask him."

So I would be there alone, with Bella, and Charlie and...Bella. Things had been going well, I could do this.

"Go clean yourself up. Dinner will be ready in about forty-five minutes," she said, patting my arm.

That night we sat down as a family for dinner; Mom, Carlisle, Alice, Jasper, and me. Emmett and Rose were the main topic of conversation. They had been in their new house in Port Ludlow for a couple of weeks. Rose had just started her new job. They were 'actively' trying for a baby now. I pretended that I didn't know what that meant so that I wasn't assaulted by visions of my brother doing the nasty with his pain in the ass wife. Emmett was apparently more determined than ever now that he had spent time with Charlie. They were hoping to bring another little Cullen into the family by next summer.

No one gave me a hard time about anything. No one looked at me with nervous, irritated or angry expressions. We laughed and joked and enjoyed our meal. Afterwards Jasper kicked my ass at Foosball. I went to bed with a smile on my face.

When I woke in the morning I growled in frustration. My morning wood situation was getting out of control. I jumped in the shower and rubbed one out as quickly as I could before getting dressed and running down the stairs.

It was eight o'clock so I didn't expect Alice to be home, but, there she was, drinking a cup of coffee and looking over some paper.

I snorted when I saw her. "What are you doing?"

She looked at me over the top of her glasses. "Reading. What are you doing?"

"Alice, you don't need glasses."

"I know that, but they're fashionable. And they bring out my eyes. And they give Jasper naughty ideas. She waggled her eyebrows.

"Ugh, I did not need to know that, thank you."

She laughed.

"Can you get you a cup of coffee?"

I shook my head "No, thank you. I'm meeting Bella and Charlie at the park. I figured I'd stop by the coffee shop and pick something up for us both.

"Caramel Macchiato," Alice said with a wink.

"What?"

"Get her a Caramel Macchiato. Just trust me," she grinned.

"Okay," I responded, ruffling her hair.

She tried to slap at my hand, but I dodged her, snickering as I made my way to the refrigerator and pulled out the orange juice.

XXXXXX

Bella wasn't there yet when I got to the park, so I made my way to the bench, set down her coffee and waited. She didn't keep me waiting long. Within a few minutes I turned just as Charlie was flying into my arms. The second I set him down, he was away again. I had to admit, my kid was fast. There were all sorts of sports that he could play being that fast.

I turned back to Bella and smiled. She looked surprised, but happy. And when I handed her the coffee and she took a drink, I was treated to the sexiest show ever. Her pink tongue swirling expertly over the plastic lid made my whole body react. I unconsciously took a step forward so that I was standing mere inches away from her. I tried to force the graphic images out of my head, but I couldn't, until she opened her eyes and startled. She took a step back and I remembered myself.

Then, I saw it. No matter how much she had tried to cover that shit up, I knew a black-eye when I saw one. I went to reach for her face so that I could get a better look and she flinched. She fucking flinched. Someone had hit this woman. Someone had hit, or rather, kicked as she corrected me, the mother of my child and I was going to tear that asshole apart limb from limb. There was only one person in her life that I could see doing that to her. That motherfucker, Riley, was going to pay.

Imagine my surprise when it wasn't actually him. Goddammit! I was looking forward to that confrontation. Once again, I felt like a complete dumb ass. The only thing that made me feel any better was that she had called Charlie '_our_' son. Not hers, ours.

Unfortunately, my mood was taken right back down.

"He could never hurt me."

That's what she said. It was like a punch to the fucking stomach. He would never hurt her, but I had. I had hurt her a lot. I didn't stand chance.

I let it go and changed the subject to them moving in. I seriously debated as to whether I should tell her about Charlie's declaration of her night-time crying. In the end, I did. I wanted to know what she cried about, but we never got there.

Charlie wanted to play and the look on his face made him irresistible. We begged Bella to join us. I even used my crooked smile on her. It had been a long time since I flashed that smile with intention, but I think it worked.

There was a reason that being a dad scared the shit out of me. And that's because I'm an idiot with no common sense. Of course he could fall. Why couldn't I see that? Bella could see that. But before I could do anything, he did. I didn't think, I didn't breath. I snatched him out of the air and fell to the ground.

His cries were agonizing. That was my fault. I felt his tiny arms around my neck, his fingers clenching the collar of my shirt. And then Bella was there, but I couldn't let him go, and he didn't let me go. So we sat there until he was no longer crying.

I knew Bella was going to yell at me. When I put Charlie into his seat, I whispered to him.

"I'm so sorry, buddy. I won't let anything like that ever happen again, okay?"

He nodded.

"Do you forgive me?"

He nodded again.

I didn't want to shut that door. I didn't want to face her. But when I did, she surprised me. She didn't yell. Her hand in mine felt so good. It was slightly cooler; so small and delicate. She told me that they had all made mistakes, even her. I didn't really want to hear about the other men in her life who had always been there for her and Charlie, but I had to admit that it made me feel better. Especially considering that I hadn't actually allowed him to get hurt.

I threaded my fingers with hers and took a chance. I kissed her. It was only on the cheek, but I didn't care. And she didn't pull away.

That night I had an idea; a gift for Charlie that I hoped Bella would let me give him. Yes, it would be a little expensive, but would she really say no? I didn't think so.

Work on Friday went by painfully slow. I knew that Alice was having Bella over for a girl's night and Charlie would be staying too. It would be good just to hang out. At lunch I went out to buy Charlie's gift. It would have to be ordered and wouldn't be here until after they moved in, but I was excited nonetheless.

Jessica tried to corner me a few times, but I blew her off. She even left a note on my car. I should have been creeped out, but what harm could she do? She was desperate, just like she'd always been. I could handle her.

Friday night started out to be fun. Em, Jasper, and I tried to teach Charlie how to play foosball, but the poor little guy wasn't big enough to see over the side of the table. I had to hold him up, perched on my knee. He laughed and giggled at his uncles' fake groans every time his ball made it into the "goal".

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Bella, leaning back and getting girly shit down to her feet by my sister. She looked more relaxed than I had seen her in a while. That is until my mom took Charlie upstairs and Rose opened her big fat fucking mouth.

I knew that she was goading me into a fight. She had always done that, but this was bad, very bad. I was furious that she would throw that shit in my face with Bella sitting right there.

I guess Bella wasn't too thrilled either, because she took off.

"What the fuck, Rose?" I yelled.

"Seriously, Rose," Alice said angrily. "Can you not give either of them a break for one night?"

Rose opened her mouth to talk, but Emmett stopped her. "Baby, I love you, but that was fucked up."

Jasper shook his head and put his arm around my shoulders. "Don't listen to her man, she's just being a bitch. You're doing fine."

Was I? She was right, I didn't really know how to take care of him. I knew that I was beginning to care for him, a lot, but I suppose there _was_ much more to being a parent than that. Had I abandoned her. I guess I had. Not intentionally, but I still had.

"I'm going upstairs," I mumbled.

I wanted to find Bella, to see if she was okay. She was on the patio, her legs pulled up to her chest. I grabbed a blanket off of the back of the sofa and went to join her.

I sat down next to her and threw the blanket around her shoulders, but she immediately pulled it away and covered both of us. I wanted to comfort her. I _needed_ to comfort her. Tentatively, I put my arm around her shoulder, asking her if it was okay.

And we talked. We were so close, so close. I wanted to tell her everything, to confess. And I would have, if those damn interfering women hadn't screwed up the moment...again.

I looked at my sister. She must have read in my eyes what I couldn't say out loud.

"Not tonight, Edward, please not tonight," she whispered. I nodded, defeated and exhausted and put my head in my hands.

The next morning, Em came in my room to wake me up.

"Dude, you have got to see this," he snickered.

I was too tired to argue. I grabbed a t-shirt and followed him into the basement.

All three women were sprawled out across the floor, tangled in blankets. I couldn't help but laugh. As Bella started to stir, I went to the mini-fridge to grab a few bottles of water. They looked like they were going to need it.

As the three of them woke slowly and painfully, I watched. I have to say that out of the three of them, Bella was the least scary. Her hair was crazy all over the place, but I guess since she didn't wear much make-up, she didn't have the smears all over her face that both Alice and Rose had.

She was surprised that I was there, but she teased nonetheless. I thought that maybe this would be a good day for us; Until Alice stole Bella's phone and started reading those messages. I could only assume that they were from Riley considering their nature.

Bella looked embarrassed. I was pissed and fucking jealous. Thank God that Emmett stopped them before they got any more graphic, but I had to get out. I had known that Bella had a relationship with this guy, but to hear it spelled out like that for me was, well, it was frustrating to say the least. So I got out of there as quick as I could.

My mom was in the kitchen making pancakes with Charlie. He stood on that stool- booster seat thing at the counter top and was stirring the mix with a whisk.

He saw me and his face lit up. "Hi, Eward!"

"Morning, buddy. What are you doing?"

"Helping Gramma make pancakes," he chirped excitedly.

"Oh yeah?"

"Uh huh. I'm stirring weawy good."

"Really good?" I repeated with a laugh.

He nodded happily. "Are you hungry?"

"I sure am. Good morning, Ma," I said, kissing my mom on the side of the head.

I grabbed the orange juice out the fridge and poured a glass for myself. I looked over at Charlie.

"Do you want some OJ, Charlie?"

"Uh huh," he answered still studiously stirring the pancake mix.

"Ma?"

"No thank you, sweetheart."

I looked in the cabinet and only saw tall glasses. "Do we have anything more kid friendly?" I asked my mom.

"Look in the cabinet to your right."

I opened it up and, sure enough, there were several plastic cups with lids. I had to try a few lids on the cup that I had picked out before one actually fit, but eventually I figured it out. By that time, Mom had moved Charlie over to the island and set a plastic plate with a cut up pancake on it. Next to him, she set down my plate, with four pancakes.

Charlie gaped at my plate. "How come you get so many?"

"Because I eat a lot," I snorted.

"Mommy says I eat a lot too."

At the mention of Bella, I tensed a little.

"If you finish that one, you can have more," Mom stated, handing me the syrup.

"He's going to need help with that."

I opened up the lid and poured a light coating of syrup over Charlie's pancakes.

"I wike wots of syrup," he grinned.

"I'm sure you do," I laughed. I wasn't going to give him any more, but I figured, what the heck.? So I drizzled a little bit more on.

Charlie looked like he had just won the lottery, making me think that Bella probably didn't let him have that much. Whoops.

Suddenly, she was standing next to me. I was instantly on edge. She actually dragged me in the other room. I suppose it was probably good, because honestly, Charlie didn't need to see us argue.

I spent the next two days in a funk. I called Bella twice. Once on Sunday and again on Monday night. Both times, it went to voicemail. Work on Monday was tiresome and boring. I spent over half the day cleaning up after a series of patients who had come in with the stomach flu. Gross. It's not like we could actually do anything for them. It was a virus. All they succeeded in doing is throwing up all over the clinic waiting room as opposed to their own homes.

On Tuesday morning, I was just getting ready to get into my car to go to work when my cell phone rang.

"Hello."

"Hey, Edward."

_Oh God. How did she get my cell phone number?_

"I'm just heading in, what do you need?"

"Mmmm, that's a loaded question."

"Jessica?"

"You're such a party pooper, Edward. Jeffrey's sick today. He caught that stomach flu that's going around so he's not coming in."

"Don't you think you should probably call him Dr. Oleander?"

"Why?"

"I don't know. Respect maybe?"

"Psh, whatever. He doesn't care. We're all adults."

I sighed. "All right, well thanks."

"What are you going to do today then?"

"I don't know, go back to sleep, hang around the house and watch TV, maybe go see Charlie and Bella."

"Oh, okay, well, I'll see you later then."

_Click_

I cringed. That was weird.

I climbed out of the car and went back inside. My mom had already left for work, as had Jasper for some early morning meeting, but Alice was still at home. She was on the phone when I re-entered the house. She didn't see me come back in and I didn't want to interrupt so I just sat down at the kitchen table.

"No, she went up to Seattle yesterday."

My ears perked up. I know I shouldn't have been eavesdropping, but I couldn't help it.

"Mom took care of Charlie all day."

They were talking about Bella.

_Mom took care of Charlie all day yesterday? How did I not know this?_

I thought back to yesterday. I hadn't seen my mother at all.

"Of course she went to get laid. I can't say that I blame her, but it's really hard to watch."

Oh, Fuck. Here I was again, getting Bella's sex life thrown in my face. Unintentionally, yes, but still.

"I know, I know. I have no doubt the man is in love with her. It's only a matter of time before he declares it."

I closed my eyes and ran my hand through my hair. Why was I torturing myself? It was obvious that Bella and Riley were going to figure out their feelings sooner rather than later. And he had several up on me. He knew everything about Charlie. He was there for his first word, his first step. He had always been there for Bella. He got to hold her hand, and kiss away her tears. He had made love to her.

"He's trying so hard. I wish you wouldn't try to piss him off all the time. I...Holy Shit!"

I looked up and saw my sister staring at me.

"How long have you been sitting there?"

"Long enough."

"Fuck, Rose, I gotta go." She snapped her phone shut. "Jesus Christ, Edward, couldn't you have warned me or something?"

"Sorry, I didn't want to interrupt."

"Did you hear all of that?" she whimpered.

"I heard enough."

"Oh, Edward."

"Don't, Alice, please." I begged. I couldn't do this right now.

"You need to tell her."

"I was going to. Friday night."

"I know, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to barge in there, but she really needed a chance to let loose. If you had told her then, it, well it would have been bad."

"I should have told her eight years ago."

Alice sighed. "I, I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. It was a long time ago. I get why you did it."

"Tell her, Edward."

I shook my head. It was too late.

Alice wrapped her arms around my neck. "I was supposed to be at work by nine, I gotta go. I'm. . . I'm sorry."

I waved her off.

She took one more sad glance at me, grabbed her purse, and left.

The house was so quiet I thought I would go crazy. Instead, I went to my piano. I didn't really think about what I was playing. One song morphed into the next. For hours I sat there, my mood plunging even deeper. I had lost her. She ran to him after our argument. He provided her comfort and love. I provided her with nothing but painful memories.

I was so lost in my own misery that I almost didn't hear the doorbell. I'm pretty sure that it rang more than four times before I reached the door. I groaned when I opened it.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I growled.

"I got sick. Had to come home." She winked.

"So go home."

"I thought that maybe you could help me feel a little better."

"You have got to stop this."

"Why?"

"Because we're not seventeen anymore."

"Oh come on, Edward; for old times sake. It's not like Bella's not getting hers."

My head snapped up. "What the fuck does that mean?"

"Oh please, I've seen her with that boyfriend of hers. God, I don't know, a month ago. He was here staying at the motel. They couldn't keep their hands off of each other, barely made it to the room. And the sounds that came out of there. Holy Shit. He must have been working her hard."

"Shut up," I ground out, my jaw clenched tightly.

Jessica took a few steps towards me. I didn't move. She lifted herself up onto her tiptoes, her mouth dangerously close to my face.

"Come on, Edward," she purred. I felt her hand palm me through my pants.

"Stop."

Her tongue flicked against the side of my mouth. "You know he gives her exactly what she needs; exactly what she wants."

By that time I was shaking. I didn't know if I was angry, upset, or what, but I was letting Jessica get to me. Before I knew it, the back of my knees hit the sofa and I sat down.

_How the hell did that happen?_

Jessica smirked at me and bent down between my legs as she started working the zipper on my pants.

_What the fuck am I doing?_

Could I do this? I was a single, twenty-three old virile man. Jessica was right. Bella was getting hers, why couldn't I get mine? But I didn't want Jessica. I had never wanted Jessica. In my anger, frustration and flat out jealousy I just couldn't bring myself to make her stop.

Jess started working me again with her hand. I had to close my eyes. I couldn't look at who was actually doing this to me. I wanted it to be _her_. It should have been _her. _But I was too late. It would never be _her_. I groaned as I felt myself entering into warm wetness. I wasn't fully hard, but it didn't matter. I would be if I pictured someone else. And so I did. And the fantasy was amazing, for the ten seconds that it lasted.

"Edward!" I heard the scream.

_Oh Fuck! This is not happening._

I startled, throwing Jessica backwards. I looked at Bella, whose face looked both mortified and livid. And then I saw her hands. I nearly vomited at the sight before me. Charlie was there. My son had just walked in on me with my dick in someone's mouth. Fuck.

Bella started to leave. I had to get to her. To explain. To explain what though?

She wouldn't even look at me and then she was gone; taking my son with her. I wanted to fucking punch something, but I had to get rid of my problem first.

That bitch knew exactly how to get me to cave. But I was the asshole who let her get to me. After I watched Bella's car pull away I turned around to face Jessica.

"Now you listen to me," I said clearly so that she would understand. "I want you to leave me the fuck alone. No more touches, no more innuendos, no more cornering me, no more notes, no more fucking stalking me. If you so much as wink at me, I will make your life a living hell. This. Stops. Now."

Jessica stared at me with wide eyes. "But..."

"No buts. It was a big fucking mistake. It's done. Go home."

I pushed past her, leaving her alone. I didn't give a shit what she did as long as she left.

I had to prepare myself for what I knew was coming. I could feel my walls fortifying themselves. Bella was going to yell; I was going to fight. I wouldn't let her take Charlie away from me, not again.

By the time Bella returned that evening, I was ready for anything she could throw at me and she didn't disappoint. Her acid tongue was just what I needed to light up my temper. My father's temper. God, I hoped Charlie didn't inherit that. For almost an hour, we screamed, we yelled, we name called, and we threatened. She wasn't backing down, so neither would I.

When Alice came in and started talking about STD's, I almost lost it. Why the fuck didn't I think about STD's? I knew that Jessica had been around the block. Fuck, I knew that. I was so consumed with jealousy and frustration that nothing else mattered. Now, I was going to have to get tested again. Dr. Oleander would give me that look; that look I hated. Disappointment.

By the time Alice left, Bella had calmed down. My anger had faded significantly, but everything else remained; the embarrassment, the guilt, the pain, the fear. I was absolutely petrified that Charlie had seen something. I didn't know anything about child psychology, but was concerned what the outcome of my stupidity would be for him. The worst part, however, was the fact that I was not fit to be a parent. Now that I actually wanted to be one, the idea that Bella would take him from me was agonizing. Her assurance before she left that she wouldn't did little to comfort me.

I thought that if I gave her space it would be easier. I needed space too. This whole situation was still so fucked up. I stole away to my room for the rest of the night, not bothering to even go down for dinner. No one bothered me either. Alice must have told them to leave me alone. She could be an interfering, nosy little brat, but sometimes my sister knew exactly what I needed.

The following day I went to work, dreading whatever confrontation I would end up having with Jessica. Luckily, she stayed home sick.

I called Bella when I got home to talk to Charlie. He didn't act any different than usual. He told me about how SpongeBob was catching jellyfish with Patrick with a special net, but then the net got stolen. I didn't understand, but I supposed I didn't need to. At least he didn't ask me what my penis was doing in that weird girl's mouth.

On Thursday, Bella called early to tell me that Charlie had a fever and was vomiting so they wouldn't make it to the park. I was disappointed to say the least. I needed to know that we were okay. I asked if she wanted some help before I went to work, but she said no. I thought that maybe she was still mad. She probably didn't want me around when he was sick in case we fought again. So I sent Carlisle instead. He was happy to do it and it made me feel better.

On Friday I called again. Charlie was feeling better, but they were still lying low. They would be moving in the next day. Bella would have to see me then, right? I didn't want push her, but it had been nearly a week since I had seen Charlie, other than the incident, and I was getting antsy. I was quickly finding that I had developed sort of an odd addiction to him. How do you go from not knowing someone exists to finding it hard to be away from them in such a short period of time?

Jessica still hadn't come back to work. We had an older woman in from the temp agency to cover for her. She was really good and I didn't have to worry about her hitting on me. She had just celebrated her fortieth wedding anniversary with "the love of her life".

"You know, she's not actually sick," Heidi said to me as we sat down for lunch.

"How do you know that?" I asked hesitantly.

"I saw her out last night. My husband and I went to have a drink with one of his co-workers and she was there with some girl, getting completely wasted and practically humping the poor boy behind the bar."

"Figures."

"I don't think Dr. Oleander's going to keep her. She's been a waste of space around here for months. When she first started, she was okay, but lately, she's been a nightmare. Plus, Sharon is amazing and is looking to be hired on full-time."

"Heidi?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you run a culture on me?"

She raised her eyebrows. "You just got tested."

"I know. I need another one. Preferably one that Dr. Oleander doesn't lecture me for."

She stared at me for a second. "Please, tell me you didn't, Edward."

"I didn't. I swear. I just. . . I need to make sure."

Heidi blew out some air and nodded. "I'm not doing this again though. Cover. Your. Shit."

I groaned. So fucking embarrassing.

XXXXX

I woke up Saturday morning to my phone ringing. I grabbed it from the nightstand and opened it without looking. I smiled as the voice on the other line told me to come to Port Angeles.

"Ma, I gotta go to PA."

"Bella and Charlie are moving in today," she said, concerned.

"I know. It's important."

She looked at me and I grinned widely. She responded with her own smile and nodded.

"I'll tell her."

XXXXX

When I pulled back into our driveway I saw Bella's car parked outside.

I practically skipped into the house. Mom was sitting in the living room with her knitting.

"Is he here yet?" I asked.

"No, not yet."

"Where's Bella?"

"She's in the apartment."

I ran back outside, up the stairs to the apartment and knocked on the door.

"Come in," I heard her voice.

I opened the door and peeked my head through. "Bella?"

I heard some rustling and then she appeared. She was wearing a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, but it was her face that caught my attention.

_Has she been crying?_

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. I'm just a little tired."

"Oh."

"So, what's up?"

"Um, well, I'm sorry I wasn't here to help, but I got a call this morning that I wasn't expecting and I really needed to get into Port Angeles."

I watched her, hopeful that we were past the drama from earlier in the week. Words were said that couldn't be taken back, but I was determined to move past them. I prayed Bella was too.

"That's okay. I'm just trying to get some things sorted before Jake gets here with Charlie."

"When will he be here?"

She looked at her watch. "I don't know, half hour maybe. It's Jake so that's give or take an hour."

I laughed.

"Look, Bella. I, uh, I got something for him."

She narrowed her eyes a little. "You got Charlie something?"

I nodded and smiled. "Please, tell me you'll let me give it to him."

"What is it, Edward?"

"Can I bring it in?"

"What is it?"

"A piano."

"A what?"

"A piano. A baby one."

"A baby piano?"

I was practically vibrating as I took in Bella's astonished face.

"I ordered it about ten days ago. They called me this morning to tell me it was in. They said they could deliver it on Monday, but I wanted to get it here for when you guys moved it."

"A baby piano?"

"Yes. A baby, baby grand."

Bella stood with her mouth agape. I couldn't read her. Was she mad that I bought him something? I was about to ask her when her face broke and she started chuckling.

"I gotta see this."

I could no longer contain my excitement "Let me go get Emmett and Jasper to help me get it in here."

"Is it big?"

"It's not huge, but it's a good size; and the box is big."

I didn't hesitate. It would take us a good twenty minutes to maneuver that thing inside and I wanted it set up before Charlie got home.

I bolted back into the house. "Are Em and Jazz around?" I asked my mom.

"Downstairs."

I leaned through the doorway to the basement. "Hey guys, I need you."

They knew where I was going this morning so I didn't need to tell them what I needed them for. They were both up within seconds and we went to work getting the piano into the apartment.

It wasn't easy, but soon enough it was inside, in the guest room, and I was able to set it up.

"What do you think?" I asked Bella as she stood in silence beside me.

"I...I...Oh Edward, he's going to love it."

"You think?"

"Uh huh."

She wrapped her hand around my bicep and leaned her head against me. I could feel my heart starting to race.

"It's, uh, it's really just a toy, but I thought it would be good for him to practice on."

"You are amazing, thank you."

Much to my disappointment, she pulled away. I followed her back into the living room.

"I guess I should head back to the house for a bit," I said, not really wanting to go. "Call me before you show him? I want to be there."

"I will."

It was about an hour later that Bella finally called. I had been on pins and needles waiting for her.

"He's just now coming down from his bedroom high," she giggled.

"Give me two minutes."

I'm pretty sure it only took me thirty seconds, but who was really counting?

When Bella opened the door, she looked a little rough.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm kinda feeling crappy, but I really do think it's just exhaustion. Come on in."

"Eward, come see my room," Charlie said jumping up and down.

"Baby, Edward has something else he wants to show you first."

"Ooooookaaaay," he whined a little.

I grabbed his hand and pulled him in the direction of the guest room. When I opened the door Charlie stopped walking.

"Is that for me?"

"It sure is, buddy."

"Weawy?"

"Yup."

He raced over to it and sat down. "It's my size."

I laughed. "It's just your size."

"Edward bought that for you, baby," Bella smiled.

"You did?"

I nodded as he gazed up at me. Before I knew it, he was in my arms, hugging me tightly.

"Fank you."

"Your welcome," I murmured.

He spent the rest of the night between tinkering on the piano and playing in his new room. Bella whipped up some homemade macaroni and cheese and I ate with them. It wasn't until Charlie started falling over in his seat at the table that Bella called it a night.

The next morning my mom asked me to go ask Bella if she and Charlie wanted to join us for breakfast.

When I got to the apartment. I knocked on the door.

No answer.

I knocked again.

Nothing.

They were here. I knew they were. I tried the door, but it was locked. I ran back to the house and grabbed my cell phone. "What's the matter?" Mom asked.

"I don't know. She's not answering the door."

"It's seven, where would she be?"

"Her car's there. I'm pretty sure she is too. She's probably still asleep. I'll just call."

I called her cell phone. It rang out. I tried the land line. It too rang out.

"Here," my mom said, handing me the key. "Knock first and don't go barging in."

"I won't."

When I unlocked the door, I opened it slightly. "Bella?"

Silence.

_Fuck._

"Bella?" I shouted a little louder.

_Maybe I should go get Mom._

I heard a noise coming from the back room. I hesitated, because I didn't know what was back there and I didn't want Bella to think that I would just go into her apartment without being invited.

"Bella?" I yelled just outside of her door.

"Edward?" Her voice sounded off. Something was wrong.

"Are you okay?"

"No."

"Can I come in?"

"Ugg. I guess."

I opened her door slowly. She was on the floor. Her face was pale, her hair, sticking to her face.

"Shit, what happened?" I asked, rushing over to her.

"I think I got Charlie's bug."

"What are you doing on the floor?"

"I was throwing up. I couldn't make it back to bed."

"Can you stand up?"

She lifted her head slightly. "No, I don't want to move."

"Can I pick you up?"

"You're gonna get sick."

"Don't worry about me. I'm going to pick you up, okay?"

She nodded slightly. Well, it was more like a head flop, but I got the message. I wrapped my left arm around the back of her shoulders and my right under her knees. I lifted, almost expecting her to weigh more than she did. I carried her back to her bed and laid her down. She didn't move and I had to adjust her so that she way lying comfortably.

I pulled the covers over her and went to the linen closet, pulling out a washcloth and wetting it with luke warm water. I sat on the side of her bed. She was pretty much out of it. She didn't complain when I ran the cloth over her face, along her hairline and down her neck. After she looked a little less sweaty, I went to the kitchen to grab her some water.

When I was heading back to her room, Charlie wandered out of his. He rubbed his eyes and looked at me sleepily.

"I'm hungry," he yawned.

"I know, buddy. Your mommy's not feeling very good. As soon as I help her, you and I will head over to my house for some breakfast, okay?"

Charlie nodded.

"Go watch some cartoons for a minute. I'll be right there."

I watched as he dragged his feet and his old ratty stuffed dog down the hallway to the living room.

I knocked lightly on Bella's bedroom door again. She didn't answer.

"Hey," I said, running the washcloth over her face again. "Bella?"

"What?"

"I've got some water for you, you need to drink it."

"I can't," she mumbled.

"You need to."

"I'm too tired."

"I'll help you, okay?"

I lifted her head up with one of my hands and put the glass to her lips. She took a tiny sip before turning her head away.

"I'm going to take Charlie to the house and get him some breakfast. I'll come back and check on you in a little bit. Is that alright?"

"I can do it."

I chuckled. "No, you can't. Sleep, drink your water. There's five adults in that house, Bella, I think we can handle it."

"Okay."

I left Bella and grabbed Charlie, wrapping a blanket from the sofa around him and carrying him to the main house.

"What's the matter?" Mom asked when we got to the kitchen.

"Bella's sick."

"Oh, dear. Is she okay?"

"She was on the floor when I got there. She's back in bed now and I got her some water. I'll check on her in a little while. Maybe Dad can take a look at her as well."

"If it's that damn flu bug, there's not much I can do," Carlisle sighed as he entered the room.

"I know, but it wouldn't hurt."

"Is Mommy okay?" Charlie asked, his eyes searching our faces.

"Mommy's fine," I assured. "We're just going to let her sleep okay? You can hang out with me and Jasper today."

My mom set a plate of scrambled eggs and sausage down in front of Charlie and he dug in. I watched him in awe. My boy could eat like it was nobody's business.

I checked in on Bella every couple of hours. Most of the time she was sleeping. I don't think she even realized I was there. I'd make her drink some water, but I don't know that she ever fully woke up. One time I just sat in the chair and watched her sleep. She looked really rough. Her hair was in tangles, her skin was both pale and flushed at the same time. She whimpered and I'm pretty sure I even heard her sob once or twice. After about ten minutes I realized how creepy it was that I was just sitting there staring at her and I left.

Carlisle checked in on her in the afternoon. He confirmed that it did, indeed, appear to be the flu bug.

By that night, she was able to keep down a handful of crackers that I had brought her and she insisted on getting up to put Charlie to bed. I waited in the living room watching that Home Makeover show until she came back out. She sat down next to me and blew a puff of air out of her mouth.

"Thank you, Edward."

"Don't worry about it. Are you feeling better?"

"A little bit, but I'm still really tired."

"Well go to bed. You have my cell phone number, call me if you need anything."

She nodded. I reached out for her hand and she let me help her up off the couch. I wanted to hold onto her, but I didn't. Instead, I let her go and left.

XXXXX

That first week was a little surreal. Bella and Charlie were at the house almost every night. We didn't fight, we didn't argue. We got along better than I could have hoped.

She agreed to let me teach Charlie to play the piano. Something that both he and I were extremely excited about.

Jessica never came back to work. After Monday, Dr. Oleander called her to tell her that she was fired for not showing up. He hired Sharon on the spot. It was like the entire clinic could finally take a breath. I'm surprised they didn't have a fucking party. I debated telling Bella. Instead, I told Alice, knowing that she would relay the information to Bella. Was I a coward? Probably, but I wasn't willing to rock the boat by bringing up Jessica in any way, shape, or form.

I don't know what happened, but something had changed. Something had changed in a very good way. I loved seeing Charlie every day. I guess you could say we were bonding. Emmett and I even introduced him to the wonderful world of Star Wars. My face ached from the amusement of watching that little guy's face as we watched Episode IV for the first time.

And seeing Bella every day was...well it was building my confidence. She smiled at me, frequently. We laughed and she wasn't afraid to touch me. She actually touched me a lot. Nothing huge, but little things like grabbing my arm or slapping me in the chest playfully. I almost felt like I was twelve again and had never had a girl touch me before. My heart would speed up and I'd go all stupid. It was ridiculous.

On Friday night, I got a call from Tyler. He was heading back to Oregon on Sunday and wanted to go out.

"Mom, would you be willing to look after Charlie if Bella and I wanted to go out?" I asked.

"Sure, sweetheart, when are you going?"

"I don't know. I have to ask Bella if she wants to go first."

My mom laughed. "I think that would be a good idea."

First, I called Emmett. He was all in, but Rose would be staying back. Thank God. Jasper and Alice were both in. Now, I had to stop being a pussy and just ask Bella. It wasn't like I was asking her out on a date, but it was still a big step for us; hanging out in public and all that. I decided to call her.

"Hey," she chirped as she answered.

"Hey. I have a question for you."

"What up? Charlie, get down from there. Sorry."

"That's okay," I chuckled. "So, Em, Jazz, Alice and I are going to meet up with Tyler tonight. He's heading back to school on Sunday. Do you want to go?"

"Um, I've got Charlie."

"I asked my mom if she'd be willing to babysit. She said she would?"

_Please, please, please say yes._

"Uh, well, yeah, I guess, that sounds like fun."

"Cool. We're heading to Forks Tavern at about seven-thirty for dinner and then over to the Pub after that. I'll come up with Mom and get you. Jasper's driving so we'll all just pile into his truck."

"Okay."

At seven o'clock, my mom and I made our way over to the apartment. Charlie opened the door.

"What are you doing opening the door?" I asked.

"I'm right here," Bella smiled. "He asked, I said okay."

The woman was breathtaking. She wore a pair of dark blue jeans with caramel colored boots that came up almost to her knees and a dark blue blousy type shirt. Her hair was half pulled up.

"You look beautiful, darling," Mom cooed.

I just stood there staring like an idiot.

"Edward?"

I knew I should probably answer, but I didn't.

"Edward?"

Bella giggled.

"What?"

"Come on, let's go," she said. "Bye, baby. I'll see you in the morning okay?"

"Okay," Charlie said, wiping off the kiss that she had placed on his cheek.

"Me too, bud, be good for Gramma."

"I will."

Bella brushed past me and down the stairs. I watched her ass and flashed her my crooked smile again when she turned around and caught me ogling.

Jasper and Alice met us at the truck and we all piled in. It was a ten minute drive to The Forks Tavern and the Pub was right across the street.

Tyler was already there with Eric, a kid that we went to school with. He looked completely different though. In high school he was kind of a geek. Long stringy hair, skinny, bad acne. Now, not so much. His face was clear, his hair was cut short. He had obviously been working out because his muscles bulged out of a too tight shirt. I nodded my greeting; Bella kissed him on the cheek. His eyes darted between Bella and me. I was standing right behind her, probably closer than I should have been, but at that moment I didn't care. I ghosted my hand to the small of her back as she climbed into the large booth and then scooted in beside her.

After dinner, our group made our way across the street to the Pub. The music was thumping and there was a good size crowd inside. Well, a good sized crowd for Forks. I had been to clubs in New York City that made this place look like nothing, but it was crowded enough that Bella had to hold onto the back of my shirt as I waded my way to the bar.

"So, what's up with you and Bella?" Eric asked me, taking a sip of his beer.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I haven't seen you around in a few years, but I know you two have a kid together."

"Yeah, so?"

"I don't know. I'm just curious. So many rumors gets spread around here that it's hard to know what's true and what's not."

"Just spit it out dude, what do you want to know?"

"Are you and her together?"

"Well, it depends on why you're asking. If you're asking because you're curious, then I'm going to tell you, that it's none of your fucking business. If you're asking because you want to make a move, then I'm going to tell you, don't even fucking try it."

Eric held up his hands. "Message received loud and clear, bro."

I shook my head in agitation. I needed some air. I walked out the back exit and breathed in the cool evening air. My nose scrunched up at the smell from the dumpster, but the air still felt nice.

I was outside for less than three minutes before I heard heels clicking against pavement. I looked up and saw a woman headed straight for me.

"Hi," she smiled.

"Hi."

"I'm Victoria," she purred.

"And I'm going back in to my girl," I replied.

I went towards the door and Victoria stopped me.

"Oh, come on, big boy. You look like you need a little stress relief."

"Uh, no, thank you. I just came out for some air."

She got down on her knees and reached for my zipper. "Look, twenty bucks and I can have you cumming in less than two minutes."

I swatted her hand away from my pants and grabbed her arm, trying to pull her up, but she resisted.

"Look, I'm not interested," I growled.

A bright light shown into the alley about ten feet from where we were standing. Well, where I was standing, where Victoria was still kneeling.

I squinted as it was shown directly into my eyes.

"Well, well, well," I heard an extremely familiar voice say.

It took me just a minute to realize what exactly it looked like was going on at the moment. I let go of Victoria's arm and jumped away.

_Of all the motherfucking luck. Can I not catch a break? _

"Chief, this is not what it looks like, I swear."

"Oh really?" he asked. "Victor," the Chief nodded.

I had no idea what he was talking about until the moment she opened her mouth.

"Chief," she answered in a deep throaty voice.

I looked at Chief Swan and then back at the...the girl? She was now standing up and straightening out her dress. She grinned at me and shrugged.

"No fucking way," I laughed almost maniacally. "I'm being punked aren't I?"

The Chief moved towards me and I saw him reach to his side, the clinking of metal making me sweat a little. Was he reaching for his gun? I hadn't seen or heard from him since my return and both Bella and my dad had told me to stay out of his way. I knew he couldn't have been happy about what I had done to his little girl, especially if he knew the whole story, but he wouldn't actually kill me, would he? Everyone would know it was him. Right? Except, that they wouldn't. I was standing in the alley way behind a bar. It could be anyone. An accident, a mugging. I could feel myself start to shake a little as he pulled whatever it was from his belt.

He grabbed my arm roughly, turned me around and pushed me against the nasty ass brick wall. He pulled my arms back roughly, the slap of cold metal around my wrists startling me.

"Edward Anthony Cullen, you are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law."

"Oh my God," I groaned.

"You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you. Do you understand these rights as they have been presented to you?"

"Come on Chief, really?"

"Do you understand your rights?" he ask emotionlessly.

"Yes. But seriously, I wasn't doing anything. What are you arresting me for?"

"Solicitation," he smirked.

"Solicitation?" I squeaked.

He didn't say anything else to me, he just grabbed my bicep and forced me roughly towards the street.

"What about her, uh, him, whatever."

The chief turned. "Victor, I expect to see you at the station bright and early tomorrow morning. I suggest you go home, Now!"

"You got it Chief." And we were back to the higher, more feminine voice again. Jesus Christ, how did I not see that? Oh, yeah, the tits kind of threw me off.

We reached his cruiser and he opened the door, putting his hand on my head as he guided me into the back seat.

"I need to make a call. I've got people in the bar. Bella's in there. I need to let them know what's going on."

"You'll get your one phone call when we get to the station," he growled.

I hit my head against the back of the seat several times. This was not fucking happening to me.

The Chief got into the car and pulled away from the bar. It didn't take him long to speak.

"Oh, Edward," he chuckled darkly, shaking his head. "You know, I thought that beating the shit out of you would really make me feel a whole hell of a lot better."

I gulped. I was now in the back seat of the car of a man who really could murder me. I was handcuffed and defenseless and I had taken his daughter's virginity and left her pregnant and alone.

"Fuck," I sighed agitatedly.

"But this. . . this is so much better."

"What?" I asked, snapping my head up to look at him.

"Solicitation? Of all the people, you had to make a move on Victor Victoria, Forks' own transgender prostitute."

"I swear on my own life, Chief, that is not what was going on. I went outside for some air and..."

"Save it!" he snapped.

I bowed my head, covered my face with my hands and tried to remember to breathe. This was not even fucking funny. Bella was going to kill me. We were trying desperately to get beyond my stupidness and then I go and get myself arrested; by her father.

Could this really stick? Could I really be charged with solicitation? I hadn't done anything. I felt a knot in my stomach rapidly work it's way to my throat as a thought occurred to me. I could literally feel my face turning green and I had to swallow back the bile.

If this was really happening, Bella was going to take Charlie away from me.

"Chief Swan," I begged. "I didn't do anything. She followed me out there. I told her '_no_'. Please, if Bella thinks I actually did this I'm gonna lose Charlie for good."

My eyes burned with tears. This would most definitely be the straw to break the camel's back.

I saw him look into his rear view mirror. His eyes were narrowed and he seemed to be studying me.

He sighed loudly and pulled into the station's parking lot. "Chill out, Edward. Nobody's going to take Charlie away from you."

He couldn't know that. Bella most certainly would cut me off. I had no doubt about that.

He opened up the back door of the cruiser and pulled me out, leading me by my elbow into the station. A few of the officers looked up at me curiously as I entered, but I ignored them. Chief Swan sat me down in a chair next to his desk and handed me his phone.

"One call, Edward. Who's it going to be?"

I ran through a list of people in my head. Emmett, Alice, Jasper and Bella would certainly be missing me by now, but I couldn't call anyone who was with Bella. If I was going to talk to her about this, I was going to need her to be sober. I could call my mom, but she would probably freak out as well.

"My dad," I mumbled.

He nodded and dialed the number. He didn't even need me to tell him what it was. He shoved the phone up against my ear and I cradled it with my head, because my arms were still handcuffed behind me.

Voicemail.

"Dad, uh, it's me, Edward. I, uh, I need you to come down to the police station. I sort of got arrested. Can you just come down here and get me, please."

I looked up at Chief Swan and caught the tale end of a smile on his face. He quickly turned it into a scowl as he took the phone from me, but it didn't matter. I knew he was enjoying this. He was loving my humiliation.

"Come on," he said grabbing my arm again.

I stood up and let him lead me to lock-up. There were three cells. Luckily, he put me in the middle one, which happened to be empty. On one side of me were two men who appeared to be sleeping. One was on the bench, the other on the floor. I didn't need to be close to them to smell the alcohol. On the other side was a teenager. He looked like he was high. He was bouncing up and down on his toes as he paced the cell. He kept scratching at his arms and face. I knew that look, that behavior. He was on Meth.

He caught me watching him.

"What the fuck are you looking at," he snarled.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I was not going to get into a pissing match with a strung out little brat.

"Yeah, whatever," he growled and went back to his pacing...and picking. Gross.

Apparently, Chief Swan had decided to stick around the station. Since the holding cells were at the end of a hallway, I couldn't see the whole of the front room of the station, but I could see his desk. He sat down in his chair and one of his deputies approached him, putting on his jacket. I sat down on the aluminum bench at the back of the cell and put my hands over my face.

A little while later, I lifted my head when I heard the chief laughing loudly and I could see he was on the phone.

_Glad he's having such a good fucking time_

I have no idea how long I had waited. Long enough for my buzz to wear off. Long enough to know that my dad should have gotten my message. I think it was even long enough to doze off a little, because I was suddenly jolted by a series of profanities followed by a stench beyond anything I could have possibly imagined.

Heavy footsteps sounded against the concrete floor.

"Fuck," Chief Swan muttered as he entered the room with his sleeve over his nose. "God dammit, Roger."

I looked over and saw that one of the drunkards had vomited all over himself and the floor. It looked like he had initially made some sort of attempt to move, but then just gave up, because he was still sitting in a pile of puke.

Now, I don't have a weak stomach by any means, but that was just foul.

"Come on, Chief, don't make me stay in here with that. I promise I will sit nicely and quietly if you let me come out front."

"You're dad called a few hours ago. Said he wasn't able to pick you up until he got off shift."

"That's at seven tomorrow morning."

"Nope, that's at seven this morning."

"What time is it?"

"Three."

"In the morning?"

He just gave me a "are you stupid" look and turned back around.

_Okay, now I see where Bella and Charlie must have inherited it from._

"Said he'd would work on getting someone else to come in and pick you up," he added as he walked down the hallway.

"You're really going to leave me in here?" I yelled.

"Yup."

_Why, oh why, does Bella have to be the police chief's daughter?_

I was pretty sure that, at this point, he was getting his revenge on me for violating his little girl. I suppose I should have been happy about him simply torturing me, because it really could have been worse. Like, he could be burying my body right now worse.

I couldn't really sleep so I dozed over the next couple of hours. The drunk guy kept puking and the meth kid was screaming like someone had lit him on fire.

A little while later I heard a distinctly familiar feminine voice coming from the front of the station.

_Shit!_

She was grumbling and her voice was getting closer and closer.

"I can't believe you."

_Oh, I'm in for it._

"You are unbelievable, you know that?"

I went to answer her, but when I looked at her, she wasn't facing me. She was facing...her father?

Chief Swan had a smirk on his face.

"Let him out of there. Now, Daddy."

"All right, all right."

"What's, uh, what's going on."

Bella met my gaze and chuckled a little. "Oh, Edward, I am so sorry."

I frowned. What the hell was she apologizing for?

"Come on," she said as the chief unlocked the door and let me out.

I reached for her outstretched hand. I was really confused. And really fucking tired.

She pulled me towards the front of the station and we stopped at Chief Swan's desk where Bella held out her free hand in a "gimme" motion.

Her dad handed her an envelope that held my watch and wallet. "I'll deal with you later," she warned him. I glanced up at the clock. It was only five-thirty.

"Where's Charlie?"

"Your dad called me about an hour ago and told me that my father had arrested you. I called Alice to stay with him so I could come pick you up. He's still asleep."

"Did he tell you why I was arrested?" I asked nervously as we climbed into her car.

"Yes, apparently when he called my dad, he was told that you were arrested with Victor."

"I swear, I wasn't doing anything, Bella. Shit, I didn't even know she was a dude."

Bella laughed. "I know you didn't do anything, Edward. My dad said Victor called him right after he arrested you and told him that you adamantly refused his services."

"So why the hell did he keep me so long?"

Bella's lips twitched. "Uh, yeah, I really do want to apologize for that."

"Apologize for what?"

"He was fucking with you."

"What?"

"He's been waiting for almost two months, Edward. I think he found his chance to let you know how he feels."

"He...he scared the shit out of me."

"I think that was probably his plan."

I leaned my head back against the passenger seat and closed my eyes. This had been a long fucking night.

"Where did you think I went?" I asked quietly.

"Um, we didn't know."

I peaked my eye open and glanced sideways at her. "Bella?"

"Don't worry about it Edward, it doesn't matter what I thought."

"It does matter."

She didn't say anything. She just bit her lip and turned on the car.

"You're not going to tell me?"

"Let's just say that you being in jail is much better than where I thought you might have gone."

I sighed. She had no reason to trust me. I could try to convince her that I had learned my lesson and I'd be staying away from sluts like Jessica from now on, but would she believe me? Probably not. I was going to have to show her, and hope to God that my propensity for attracting trouble didn't completely ruin us.

I must have looked really pathetic, because Bella grabbed my hand again and squeezed.

"We're fine, Edward, okay? We're fine."

Without thinking, I lifted her knuckles to my mouth and kissed them lightly.

"Yeah, well, we're going to be."

**XXXXXX**

**AN: There you go. EPOV, what did you think?**

**If you're wondering, we had a conversation about Edward getting caught with a transvestite hooker on the thread. That's where it came from. LOL. I'm adding this after posting b/c people in reviews have asked. Chief Swan did not set Edward up. He caught him in a compromising position and took advantage. He was arrested for solicitation, but not booked. The Chief was just having a bit of fun. That part was not meant to offend anyone.**

**New links on my profile page:**

***Photo of the mini baby grand that Edward bought Charlie. It's a 250 pound toy piano, that's how they were able to move it.**

*** My Interview with Mrs. White on PIC Fanfic corner.**

***AND Little Charlie has been nominated as best kid for the Avant Garde awards. Voting starts Nov. 20th. at twilightfb-awards (dot) blogspot (dot) com. Thank you to whoever nominated him.**

**Next week: Bella gets treated to a half naked Edward.**


	17. Finding Marlin

**AN: What to say, what to say.**

**Thank you so much to everyone who is reading and reviewing.**

**Thank you to Mel for pre-reading this sucker and for your kind words and advice last week. Thank you to Mollie who pre-reads, betas, and generally keeps my ass in line (especially w/my commas LOL)**

**Thank you to everyone who has supported me, rec'd me, interviewed me, etc.**

**Everything Twilight related belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Storyline is mine.**

**XXXXXXXX**

Chapter 15: Finding Marlin

BPOV

"Where the fuck did he go?"

"I don't know. He was here a minute ago."

"If he took off with some broad, so help me..."

"Emmett!" Alice squealed. "Bella, he wouldn't.

I bit my lip, but stayed silent. Would he? Yes, he probably would. And, in all honesty, he had the right to. I had no claim on him. But we had been getting along so well and he invited me here, hadn't he? Would he just leave me?

Alice stood directly in front of me and put her hands on my shoulders. "Bella, I'm telling you, he absolutely would not do that. Please, trust him."

I smiled half-heartedly. "It's none of my business what he does, Alice, as long as he doesn't bring it around Charlie, I'm fine."

Alice looked at me sadly. She was trying so hard to convince me, and yet I'm not sure she actually believed it herself.

"Hey, Tyler, you see where Edward went?" Emmett yelled over the music.

"Nah, man. He bit Eric's head off awhile ago and then disappeared."

A loud ringing sounded out across the room announcing last call.

"Well, what the hell are we supposed to do?" Emmett asked.

"Hang around until the bar clears, I guess." Jasper sighed.

"And?"

"And we're not his babysitters. If he's not here, he must have gone...elsewhere."

Jasper glanced at me. I looked away.

"Maybe he just didn't feel good. Maybe he needed to go home," Alice suggested.

"Without telling someone?"

"Shut-up and go check the bathrooms, Emmett."

Emmett nodded and disappeared down the hallway to the restrooms.

"Nope," he said as he returned. "I even checked the ladies room." He grinned. "Almost got slapped, but I didn't find a brother."

The bell rang again to announce that the bar was now closed.

"Guys, we can't just leave him," Alice pleaded.

"We're not leaving him Allie, he's not here," Jasper soothed.

"It's fine, Alice," I said, looping my arm with hers and dragging her towards the door. "I'm sure he's fine. Probably met someone he knows."

"Bella, I really don't think..."

"Alice."

She must have read something in my expression, because she didn't say anything else.

The short trip home was quiet. Emmett grabbed a ride with us, since he had been drinking, and let me snuggle up into the crook of his arm. Jasper was playing some really mellow music and I nearly fell asleep. Or maybe I actually did, because I jumped when Emmett shifted me.

"We're home," he said quietly. "I'll walk you over."

I trudged my still buzzed self up the stairs to my apartment with Emmett's hand on my back. I'm not sure if it helped with all the stumbling he was doing, but I appreciated the effort. When we got to my door, I hugged him goodnight, probably holding onto him longer than I really needed to, but I was in need of a little comfort and he was like a giant bear.

He waited until I got my keys out and unlocked the door before leaving me. I watched him amble down the stairs, holding onto the railing. He was still obviously intoxicated.

It was quarter past one and I really didn't expect Esme to still be awake. I had told her she could sleep in the guest room, but she was still there, on the sofa, knitting.

"Oh! Hi," I squeaked.

"Hi, Bella. Did you have a good time?"

"Um, yes, I did, thank you." I could hear the slight slur of my voice and I winced. I really hadn't had that much to drink, but it didn't ever take a whole lot for me to feel the effects.

"Good," she smiled. "Did my son at least have the decency to walk you to your door?" she teased.

"Emmett did."

Esme frowned. "What happened to Edward?"

"I, uh, I don't really know."

"What do you mean?" she asked, setting her yarn and needles to the side and leaning forward.

I felt nervous about telling her that we had just left him, but what else were we supposed to do?

"We couldn't find him. I think he. . . well, I think he must have run into someone he knew."

Esme looked deep in thought for a moment. "Did you try his cell phone?"

"Yes." I nodded. "He didn't answer."

She stood up. "That worries me a bit. I'll go talk to Emmett, maybe give Carlisle a call."

"Okay. Thank you, Esme."

"You're welcome, darling." Her hand touched my shoulder warmly. "Everything went fine tonight," she said, changing the subject. "He ate all of his meatloaf and broccoli, drank two glasses of milk, and took a bath. He was in bed by eight, but he suckered me into reading to him until eight-thirty," she smiled sheepishly.

"I'm sure he loved that," I laughed quietly.

"Well, he was perfect, as usual. You have to know how much I adore being with him."

Her eyes sparkled with emotion. It was the affection, the love, that a grandmother holds for her grandchild.

"I know," I said quietly.

She hugged me tightly and then reached for her knitting.

"I'll see you in the morning, sweetheart."

"Goodnight, Esme."

Once I had closed the door behind her, I literally fell into bed, stripping myself of my clothes and lying there in my underwear. I couldn't be bothered to brush my teeth or wash my face. I was just too damn tired.

What felt like seconds after I closed my eyes, I was awakened by the most annoying ringing sound. My cell phone. Funny, it didn't usually seem that annoying. If someone was drunk calling me, I was going to commit murder. I sat up way too fast, giving myself a raging headache as I grabbed my phone. What if it was Edward wondering where we had gone?

I looked down, blinking a few times so that I could see the screen clearly. Shit, it was four-thirty in the morning and my phone was reading _Carlisle._

"Is he okay?"

The words just flew out of my mouth. If it was Carlisle calling, it couldn't be good, could it? My heart was in my throat for those few seconds before he spoke.

Carlisle chuckled. "He's fine, Bella. I'm sorry to wake you, but I need to ask you a really big favor."

"He's fine? Where is he?"

_Do I really want to know? _

"That's part of the favor."

"Oh," I said tiredly. "Yeah, what can I do?"

"I need you to go get him."

"What do you mean go get him?" I flopped back down on my bed and put my arm over my face. If he was hurt or stuck, I would go get him. If Carlisle was asking me to go pick him up from some girl's house, I was going to hang up on him.

"Hmmm, well, it seems he got himself arrested."

_Oh, shit._

"Arrested?"

"Yes, by your father."

I was speechless. Oh God, what had he done? My father, not Edward.

"For what?"

"Okay, before I tell you, I want you to know that it isn't true."

"Carlisle?"

"He was arrested for solicitation."

"Oh my God."

"Apparently, your father found Victor Victoria on his knees in the alleyway in front of Edward."

If my mouth hadn't been so dry I probably would have choked. Victor Victoria? Really? I didn't see Edward as the kind to go in that direction, but Victor did make one hell of a convincing woman.

"Your dad arrested him, but Victor called and said that nothing was going on, that Edward absolutely refused."

I let out a deep breath. "So, why didn't he get released?"

"Yes, well, that's why I'm calling you and not Esme, Alice, or Emmett."

"My father."

It wasn't a question. I knew. My father was being a jerk.

"Yes."

"I'll take care of it. Let me get Alice over here in case Charlie wakes up and then I'll head down there."

"Thank you, Bella."

I hung up the phone and called Alice. It took her over half an hour to get to the apartment.

"Alice!" I whisper yelled. "What the hell took you so long?"

"I fell asleep again," she groaned. "Give me a break, Bella, I'm working on three hours of sleep here. Where are you going anyway?"

"To get your brother."

Alice perked up a little. "Where is he?"

"I'm going to let him tell you."

"Oh, come on. I'm here for you at five in the morning. Don't I deserve a little explanation?"

"I appreciate you helping me, Alice," I said, ignoring her question. He shouldn't wake up, but if he does, just cuddle up with him, he should fall back to sleep."

"Okay," she yawned, plopping herself down on the sofa and pulling a blanket over her.

By the time I got to the station, I was fully awake, and quite a bit pissed off. I slammed open the station door. My father looked up and a guilty expression took over his face.

"I got woken up out of a deep sleep to find out that you arrested Edward for absolutely no reason," I growled.

"I had reason," he stated.

"Not a good one. And Victor told you he didn't do anything."

"Yes, well, he needed a little bit of detox time."

"Bullshit. You are just being an ass. Where is he?"

My father grabbed his keys and stood up, taking me back to the holding cells.

The room really fucking stunk. Edward looked absolutely petrified, and really tired. I grabbed his hand and stormed out of the station. I was pissed, but in my fog and absolute exhaustion, I was also a little amused.

The ride home wasn't at all what I expected. He wasn't really defensive, which was a nice change. He was more worried that I wouldn't believe him.

We got home at quarter to six. I still had about an hour and a half to sleep before Charlie woke up.

"Bella?" Edward called just as I was about to head to apartment.

I turned and was instantly enveloped in a huge hug. It was almost like he was trying to wrap my entire body up in his. He was warm and after the second of shock, I relaxed into the hug. I put my own arms around his waist, resting my hands on his back.

We didn't speak. We didn't need to. We just sat there for a few minutes. My ear was pressed against his chest and I could hear his heart beating and feel it against my cheek. He released me and I instantly felt cold.

"Wow, my first ever Edward Cullen hug," I joked.

"No it wasn't," he snorted.

"Yes, that was definitely the first," I insisted.

"No, I hugged you on your thirteenth birthday."

I thought back and a distant memory suddenly hit me. "Oh, no you didn't," I gaped. "You tackled me on my thirteenth birthday. To the ground if I remember correctly."

He shrugged and smirked. "Same thing when you're thirteen."

"Edward, that was not a hug."

"It was meant to be."

"You're so full of shit."

"Fine, don't believe me, but I'm telling you, it was meant to be a hug. I just chickened out at the last minute.

I shook my head and laughed. "Okay, sure. Anyway, I've got to go to bed. Charlie's going to be awake soon and I'm going to be one crabby mama."

"I can just stay up and look after him while you're sleeping," Edward offered.

I actually considered it for a minute before I shook my head. "I appreciate that Edward, but you look like you got less sleep than I did."

He nodded a little dejectedly. "Are you ever going to trust me with him?"

"It's not that I don't trust you," I sighed. "I'm just used to doing it on my own. Well, mostly on my own. It's not easy to ask for or accept help."

"You trust Riley." He kind of growled Riley's name and I could see the tension in his face.

I didn't want him to feel second to Riley when it came to Charlie. Ever. I was the one who kept him from his son. I was the reason he didn't know what to do. I was the one who fucked up. Well, okay, we both did, but in any case, I needed to make it right.

"You're right, Edward. You deserve a chance to spend some one on one time with him. Can we talk about it later though?" I begged. "I am really, really tired. "

"Yeah, sure," he said a little more animatedly.

"Would you like to come over for dinner tonight?"

I watched as his eyes lit up and it made me smile.

"Um, yes, I would."

I had no doubt that he would accept.

"How about five-thirty?"

"That early?"

"Yes, Edward," I giggled. "We have a three-year-old. He goes to bed at eight. You can look after him while I'm cooking. We'll eat about six-thirty."

Edward nodded. "Do you want me to do anything?"

"Nope. Just be there. On time."

I turned, leaving him standing there. I'm pretty sure he watched me until I disappeared up the stairs to my apartment.

Alice was completely passed out on the sofa when I walked got inside. I didn't wake her, I just made my way back to my bedroom, checking in on Charlie on the way. He was still fast asleep. I curled up under my covers and fell back asleep.

XXXXX

I was able to sleep for a few more hours. Charlie woke up, but Alice kept him entertained and got him his breakfast. At two in the afternoon, I packed Charlie up in the car and drove to my dad's house.

"Grampa!" Charlie squealed as he jumped into my dad's arms.

"Hey, little man." My dad turned around carrying Charlie inside.

I cleared my throat loudly. "Don't think you're getting away with it just because you have a toddler in your arms," I warned.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Bells."

"You look tired," my dad said as we sat down on the back patio. Charlie was playing in the treehouse.

"I wonder why that is," I said sarcastically. "Oh, yeah, it might have something to do with the fact that I had to come bail out my son's father at five in the morning, because my father was being a jerk."

"You didn't have to bail him out."

"Semantics, Dad. Do you feel better now?"

My dad smiled. "Yes."

I put my hands on my hips. "Are you done with him now?"

"Sweetheart, are you asking me to forgive that boy?"

"I'm asking you to stop the nonsense. He's been working so hard, he didn't deserve that."

My dad was silent for a few minutes. "I think he cares about you, Bells."

"He cares about Charlie."

"Yes, he does, but I'm pretty sure he cares for you too."

I shook my head.

"Victor said he was desperate to get back inside to his girl. Was he at the pub with anyone else?"

"No."

"That should tell you something."

"If you were so sure that he cared about me, then why would you keep him so long?"

"Regardless of what I was told or what I may believe now, he hurt my baby girl. I deserved a little retaliation. But to answer your earlier question, yes, I'm done with him. I'll leave him alone. I'll even try to be nice to him."

I breathed out heavily. "Thank you, Daddy."

He wrapped his arm around my neck and pulled me to him, kissing my head. " I love you, kid."

"I love you too, Dad."

XXXXXX

A few hours later, Edward was knocking on my door. I looked up at the clock on the microwave. Five twenty-five. He handed me a flower and Charlie one of those dandelion that you can blow on and the seeds fly away.

"Do that outside, Charlie," I warned as he puffed out his cheeks in the middle of the living room. He stepped out on the small deck off the living room and I could hear him blowing with all his might.

"So, does Esme know you're pillaging her garden?" I teased.

"It was for a good cause," Edward smiled crookedly.

I sighed and turned around.

"Look, look, look," Charlie bounced back inside holding just the stem. "I did it. I did it."

"Awesome, buddy," Edward cheered.

"Do you wanna go play in my room?" Charlie asked. He wasn't really asking, because by this time he was already dragging Edward down the hallway. I chuckled and went about making dinner.

Chicken and dumplings was on the menu this evening. One of Charlie's favorites.

An hour later, we sat down at the table to eat.

"Oh my God, what is this?" Edward asked as he swallowed his first bite.

"It's Chicken and Dumpings," Charlie grinned.

"Dumpings?" Edward snorted.

"Dumplings," I corrected. "Why? Is it bad?" I tasted it quickly. It seemed fine to me.

"No, it's really good. I've never had it."

"It's my favrite," Charlie said stuffing another spoonful into his mouth.

Edward watched him and then shook his head, taking another bite himself.

"Can we watch a mooooovie?" Charlie begged as he pushed his empty bowl towards me.

"Get your pajamas on, brush your teeth, and we'll put a movie on."

Charlie jumped off of his booster seat and disappeared down the hallway. Edward picked up his own bowl followed by mine and Charlie's and took them into the kitchen.

"I'll clean up later. I have a little bit of work to do, is that okay? You can watch the moooooovie with Charlie," I laughed.

"That's cool with me."

I nodded. "Let me set it up."

Edward sat down on the sofa and Charlie climbed up next to him as the movie started to play.

I grabbed my laptop and sat down at the dining room table.

I was really making an attempt to get some work done, but I kept getting distracted. About twenty minutes into the movie I looked up to see Charlie leaning against Edward. Edward's fingers were absent-mindedly running through Charlie's hair. I bit my lip to hide my smile and looked back down at my laptop.

When I looked up again another fifteen minutes later, Charlie was slumped completely over into Edward's lap.

"Is he asleep?" I asked.

Edward looked down, his hands still stroking Charlie's messy locks.

"Looks like it."

I stood up. "I'll take him into his room."

Edward shook his head. "He's fine for right now. I don't mind."

"You sure?"

He shrugged. "I've never seen this movie."

"You've never seen WALL-E?"

"Um, no. I'm a guy, Bella. You know, all machismo and shit. Going to kid's movies is not something us manly men do," he grinned.

"Oh, on the contrary, Edward. Men who embrace their inner child are some of the sexiest men around," I teased.

"Huh. Really?"

"Yup. As long as you know the difference between embracing your inner child and being childish."

"Does it count if I take Charlie with me or is it only sexy to go by myself?"

"Oh my God, taking Charlie with you amplifies the sexiness ten-fold."

Edward gazed at me and then looked back down at a sleeping Charlie. "I'd like to do that."

"Amplify your sexiness?" I laughed.

"Funny," he scoffed. "No, take him to a movie. Do you think he'd want to go with me?"

_Wow, that's a big step._

"Um, yeah, I think he'd probably like that. Are we talking soon?" I asked nervously. I don't care who you are, having someone else take your child out for the first time is a nerve-racking experience even if it is his father. And Edward didn't have the greatest track record of making good decisions. But again, could I keep denying him? Eventually I would have to do it. Maybe it would be better to do it while his mistakes were still fresh in his mind. That would probably make him hyper vigilant.

"I don't know. It doesn't have to be tomorrow or anything, but maybe in the next couple of weeks."

"Okay." I conceded. "You're really just going to sit there and watch the rest of the movie with him slumped over you like that."

"Do you think he's uncomfortable?"

"No. Are you?"

Edward shook his head. "Not in the slightest. Would you like to join me?"

He patted his hand against the sofa.

I looked down at his hand and swallowed dryly. "Oh, well, give me a minute. I need to do a few things for work and then I can come...over. I can come over. And watch the movie."

Edward's shoulders were shaking in silent laughter.

"Oh, shut up." I grumbled.

When I joined Edward a few minutes later, it was a little awkward. I sat down and we stretched Charlie out on the sofa, his head in Edward's lap and his feet in mine.

I wanted to talk to Edward, but the last week had been really good. I didn't know what he had to tell me, but I really didn't want to ruin things with serious talk. I wasn't going to fool myself into believing that it would be all peaches and cream. I knew that Edward had a temper and I seemed to be exceptionally good at provoking it. I didn't want to ruin the moment.

Edward didn't bring it up either. We sat in silence watching a little cartoon robot save humanity.

"Goodnight, Bella," he whispered as he pushed a strand of my hair away from my face. His soft touch made me warm all over.

"Goodnight," I breathed.

And then, he was gone.

That night, I used my vibrator for the first time since I returned to Forks. It didn't take me long to climax. Not with the feeling of Edward's arms wrapped around me and the smell of his skin still dominating my thoughts. I couldn't remember the details of his body from all those years ago, but I didn't even have to think of anything specific, just him. I arched my back and whimpered softly as I came. I had forgotten how a little self-love could improve sleep, but that night, I slept like a baby.

XXXXX

The next morning, we were over at the house fairly early. I had offered to help Esme with some of the housework in order to feel like she wasn't offering me a handout in the form of the apartment. There was still a large amount of dust and cobwebs that had collected from the years that they had been on the East Coast. She had a professional team come to clean out the apartment, but hadn't had them out to do the main house yet. I figured I'd save her the money and just do it myself.

I fed Charlie a bowl of cereal and then we made our way over. Esme was up and dressed and was planning on spending the day prepping her garden for the fall and winter weather. It was the beginning of September and it would be starting to cool off significantly in the next few weeks. I was going to start in the basement with a big tub of disinfectant, a vacuum, and a dust cloth.

"Charlie, would you like to help me in the garden?" she asked him sweetly.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Charlie said jumping up and down. "Can I shovel something?"

Esme laughed, taking his hand and leading him out.

I made my way downstairs and went to work. About an hour later, I felt the need for some coffee, or water...no, definitely coffee, and went back into the kitchen.

I suppose when you have so many people living in one house, you just make coffee and someone will drink it, because, there always seemed to be a fresh pot brewing in that house. I poured myself a cup, spent ten minutes drinking it and then put the mug in the dishwasher.

"Break's over," I sighed to myself.

As I was heading out of the kitchen, I turned the corner and ran straight into something hard, and kinda wet. Instinctively, my hands flew up in front of me. I started to fall backwards, but an arm flew around my waist yanking me forward again.

"Oh shit," Edward's voice said hoarsely.

My eyeballs were glued to his chest, where my hands were now resting. There was a splattering of chest hair and tiny water droplets were dripping down, I think from his hair, but I hadn't looked up yet, so I couldn't be sure. I followed one of the drips. It slowly made its way down the firm planes of his chest over the ridges of his abs and into the waistband of his jeans.

"Ah," I choked, unable to speak.

"Bella?" he said, garnering my attention from where the droplet had disappeared.

I looked up at him in a little bit of shock. He was smirking at me like he had just caught me...oh, wait, he _had _just caught me ogling him. Shit.

He hadn't let me go and my hands were still on him. I felt something cold against my palm. I lifted it a little and saw the steel bar that was pierced through his left nipple. I instinctively flicked it with my thumb and Edward grunted. I could feel my heart rate increasing exponentially at the sound.

I returned my attention to his face, only to find that his eyes were closed and his teeth gritting. He looked so fucking hot, I couldn't take my eyes off of him. Completely hypnotized by the sudden and unexpected surge of pure lust that racketed through me, I couldn't help myself, I flicked my thumb again and watched as he took in a deep, shaky breath.

"Ugg, Bella, please. . . please don't do that."

"I'm sorry."

He opened his eyes and I gasped a little. His pupils were so dilated that his eyes were nearly all black.

"Don't be sorry. It's just that, that kind of has an affect...on me."

"Oh, uh, okay."

He didn't immediately let me go, but I felt his grip on me loosen, eventually enough for me to step back. I dropped my hands from his chest, my eyes lingering on the barbell a little longer than they probably should have. It was really very sexy. He didn't have that the last time I'd seen his nipple.

He cleared his throat and I looked away. I could feel the heat of embarrassment encompassing my neck and face. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward adjusting himself.

_Did I do that just by flicking the barbell? _

I suddenly had no interest in leaving the kitchen.

I watched him as he went to the fridge and pulled out one of those tubes of Pillsbury biscuits. His hair was wet, and I guessed that he must have just gotten out of the shower. He was wearing nothing but a pair of loose jeans. They sat low on his hips; so low, in fact, that I'm pretty sure that he was wearing absolutely nothing underneath. The thought made other parts of me flush.

_Holy Shit. Am I really getting turned on by just the sight of Edward Cullen?That has to be against the rules of whatever we are, right? _

"Have you seen my mom?" he asked, his voice a little ragged.

I snapped out of my little haze long enough to answer his question.

"She's out in the garden with Charlie," I responded quietly. "I'm helping clean the house. . . to contribute towards my rent."

Edward lifted his head. "You know, you don't have to. . . ."

"I know. I want to."

He nodded and went back to the biscuits.

His muscles glided smoothly with every little movement. When he popped the canister, they tensed and my eyes focused in the tattoo on his left shoulder.

I found myself moving towards him and my hand was suddenly on his skin, fingering the lines of ink.

"What is that?"

Edward tilted his head to look at his shoulder. "It's a red fox."

"It's really beautiful. When did you get it?"

"Almost two years ago," he said as he watched my hand stroking his arm.

"What does it mean?"

Edward smirked. "You really want to know?"

"Yes, is it bad?"

"No, it's not bad. It has a lot of different meanings, depending on the culture, but in general the red fox is cunning and good at getting out of messy situations."

I laughed. That was fitting.

He shifted and I suddenly realized that his hands were on either side of me, boxing me against the island. His eyes were dark again, his naked chest only inches from me, his head bowed down.

"It's a symbol of passion, desire and intensity," he breathed.

He licked his lips and I watched the movement of his tongue.

"W-wow," I stuttered. "That's, uh, that's..."

Dear Lord. The power the man had over me at that moment. . . .I couldn't even form a a coherent thought.

"Mommy?"

_Oh, thank God._

"Oh, oh, oh. I didn't mean to interrupt," Esme squeaked. "I, um, oh my. Charlie, come with me, darling. Mommy and da...uh, Edward are talking."

Edward pushed off the island and took a step back. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"Yeah, me too."

"What are you sorry for?"

"I don't know."

Edward laughed. "Mom almost slipped up there, calling me daddy."

_Nice deflection._

"Oh, um yeah, I guess she did."

"Can I ask you something?" he said leaning back against the counter top opposite me and crossing his ankles.

"Sure," I answered, taking a quick breath to calm myself.

"When are we going to tell him?"

I furrowed my brow, not understanding.

"Tell Charlie that I'm his dad?"

"Are you ready for that?"

It's not like the thought had never crossed my mind. I had figured that at some point we'd tell Charlie, but I wanted to wait until Edward was comfortable.

"I...yes." He nodded.

I smiled at him. "If you're ready, then we can tell him whenever you'd like. You, um, you're planning on staying?"

I bit my lip and held my breath, waiting for his answer. I had no idea what would happen if Edward decided to leave after we told Charlie, but I supposed we'd cross that bridge when we got to it.

"I haven't made a decision about medical school yet, but I know that I want to be in his life. . . always. He's going to play a big part in what I decide."

I was slightly comforted by this, but I had no idea what Edward was expecting from Charlie. He was still a baby and this had the potential to really confuse him.

"He doesn't really understand what a daddy is, Edward. You need to be prepared for that. Riley was the only..."

"Riley is not his fucking father, I am," he almost yelled.

I closed my eyes and shook my head. "I know that. Riley knows that. Please don't think that I ever tried to get him to be Charlie's daddy. What I'm saying is that Charlie is probably not going to understand right away. You're just going to have to show him."

"I thought that's what I was doing," Edward sighed.

"You are," I comforted, reaching out and brushing my hand over his forearm. "I guess it's time to add the title too."

"Today?"

I laughed. "Anxious are we?"

"Yes," he grinned.

I nodded. "Today it is then. But I have to get some work done, so maybe a little bit later?"

"As long as it's today, I don't care exactly when."

XXXXXX

"Charlie, we've got something we want to talk to you about," I said as I sat down on the floor of the music room. Edward and Charlie were already there so I figured the best thing to do was to join them. Edward had just spent an hour teaching him which keys were which on the piano, followed by some coloring of piano notes on paper, hence the floor position.

He looked up at me with his big green questioning eyes.

"Do you want to know something?" I smiled.

"What?" he asked innocently.

"Something really cool?"

He nodded enthusiastically.

"You know how Edward has been spending a lot of time with us lately."

"Uh huh."

"Well, that's because he wanted to get to know you. Do you know why?"

He shook his head and flashed a cheeky smile at Edward.

"Because..."

Now that I was actually doing this, I suddenly felt a huge surge of nervousness attacking my vocal chords. My heart was pounding, my ears ringing.

_Oh my God, am I really about to do this? To finally tell my son who his daddy is? They both deserve this so much._

All of the sudden I felt Edward's warm hand encompass mine. I glanced over at him to see that he mirrored my nervous look. I returned my gaze to Charlie who was still wide-eyed and waiting for me to continue.

"Because Edward is your daddy, Charlie," I finally breathed out.

Charlie just stared at me.

"Do you know what that means?" I asked him with a little bit of amusement.

He shook his head. Edward looked worried.

"Well, oh, I know. You know how in the Santa Clause movie, Santa is Charlie's daddy?"

Charlie's mouth dropped. He looked over at Edward. "You're Santa Cwaus?" he gaped.

I burst out laughing, as did Edward. "No, buddy, I'm not Santa Claus."

He looked to me. "Um, next."

"Hey, at least I'm trying. You got something better?"

He shook his head and continued chuckling.

"Okay, so...oh, this one will make much more sense. You know how Marlin is Nemo's daddy?"

Charlie nodded.

"Well, Edward is like Marlin and you are his Nemo."

I could see Charlie's little mind processing what I had just said to him. Edward squeezed my hand tighter, but I think it was an subconscious action.

Charlie bit his lip. "So, if I get wost you will find me?" he asked looking over at Edward.

Edward let go of my hand and motioned for Charlie to come to him. Charlie crawled across the floor and into Edward's lap.

"If you ever got lost, I would absolutely swim across an entire ocean to find you," Edward assured.

My heart absolutely melted. My eyes stung from the tears that I was holding back.

"Do you have any questions?" I asked him nervously. I really didn't know what kind of questions he would ask or if he would even really understand.

"Do I get to call you daddy?"

Edward smiled broadly. "You can call me anything you want."

XXXXXX

"Bella."

"Yes, Alice."

"We're going to Seattle for your birthday."

"We are?"

"Yes, we are."

"Why?"

"What did you do last year on your birthday?"

"Um, I think I...I have no idea."

"Did you go out?"

"Ha! You're funny. No. I think Riley might have come over for dinner. Oh, no, he brought us dinner," I remembered.

"And what did you do for your twenty-first birthday?"

"Now that one I remember. That was the year Charlie turned one. I came back to Forks. My dad took us to the Forks Tavern and bought me a beer. Charlie got sick and threw up all over the table."

Alice scowled at me. "Really?"

"Yes, really."

"Okay, well, this year we're going out. Like, going to Seattle, renting a room and partying it up, out."

"No, Alice, come on. I've been out more in the last two months than I have in the last two years. I can't keep dumping Charlie with your mom."

"She loves doing it."

"I get that, Allie, I really do, but it's not fair."

"Did you just call me Allie?"

"Um, I don't know, did I?"

She giggled. "You've been spending too much time around my brother...or my boyfriend. It better be my brother though," she teased. "So, anyway. This will be it, I promise that I won't beg you to go out again for another six months."

"Really, a whole six months?"

"Come on Bella, Pleeeeeeeaaase. Plus, it'll be a great time for us all to meet Riley."

"Oh, shit, then no way. Absolutely not."

"Are you embarrassed of him?"

"No."

"Then what's the problem?"

"Edward and Riley in the same room, that's the problem."

"Edward will behave himself. I'll talk to him. He's much more agreeable these days." Alice grinned.

"For some reason, I really don't believe that."

XXXXXX

It had been four days since we'd told Charlie that Edward was his father and he had yet to call him "daddy". Edward was a little put out by it, but he tried to hide it. The week had been rough on both of us. He was grumpy and took it out on me.

Monday, I had a meeting with Luke and Cammy. I had to drop Charlie off with Jake on the reservation, which both of them were thrilled about. Jake had been busy with Claire and their fledgling relationship and hadn't had nearly as much time with to spend with us. I understood, I really did. Jake was head over heels in love with this girl and he was happier than I had seen him in ages.

"So how are things going?" he asked while we watched Charlie run through the sand at First Beach.

"Fine. We told Charlie that Edward was his daddy yesterday."

"Do you think that was smart?" Jake asked curiously.

I shrugged. "I don't know. He's been actively participating in Charlie's life for the last five weeks. I think he's fallen in love with him."

"Well, duh. How could he not? How did Charlie take that news?"

"Better than I expected. He seemed to understand. Charlie, stay out of the water! Don't let him get wet, Jake, it's starting to get too cold for that."

Jake nodded. "Do you trust him?"

"That's a really good question," I sighed. "I trust that he cares about Charlie. I trust that he wouldn't ever intentionally do anything to harm him."

"Well that's a start."

"I suppose."

Jake put his arm around my shoulders.

"What's the matter, Bells?"

I was almost afraid to tell him, but Jake had always been there for me and never judged me. On top of that, he didn't have a vested interest which made him the best person to really talk to.

"I'm having . . feelings, that I don't know what to do with."

"What sort of feelings?"

"That's just it, Jake, I don't know. I can't figure them out."

"Good feelings? Bad feelings?"

"I suppose it would depend on your definition."

"Cut the shit, Bella."

"I saw him half naked yesterday and seriously wanted to jump him," I spit out quickly.

Jake laughed. "That's all?"

"No," I said biting my lip.

Jake reached over and pulled it from my teeth. "Stop doing that."

"I see him with Charlie and. . . and my heart wants to explode. I get hit with this overwhelming rush of emotion that makes me want to take it all back."

Jake widened his eyes in question.

"I think I was wrong, Jake. He may have been upset, he may have been an asshole, but I think I underestimated him."

Jake took my hand and grabbed my chin. "You can't change the past, baby girl."

"I know."

"So stop worrying about it."

I nodded. "I'm trying."

I looked at my watch. "Shit, I have to go. I'm supposed to be in PA in less than an hour."

"You trying to impress your boss?"

"No!" I frowned. "I mean, yes. Why?"

"You're dressed pretty fancy."

I looked down at my clothes. I had a pair of fitted black pinstriped slacks on and a white silk blouse. My strappy heels hung from my hand.

"I don't get a chance to dress up much."

"You sure?"

"Yes, he's hot, but he's involved with his other assistant. Besides, I think I have too much testosterone in my life as it is."

"Ouch."

"Not you, honey," I laughed, slapping his cheek playfully. "Next to Alice, you're the best girlfriend I've got."

Jake scoffed, but flashed me a huge toothy grin. "Well, I love you too."

"Charlie," I yelled at my son who had discarded his shoes and was now jumping up and down in the water. "I have to go. Get out of the water and be good for Uncle Jake."

"Kay, Mommy," he shouted back before taking a leap right into a puddle in the sand.

I groaned and shook my head.

"I'll see you in a bit."

"See ya, Bells."

XXXXX

Our meeting was...interesting. Cammy was nothing short of a complete bitch. Luke ignored her. It was like I was sitting in the middle of a really nasty lovers spat. It was highly uncomfortable.

We were getting ready to increase our hours and I was going to have to secure a daycare provider for Charlie.

When I told Edward, he wasn't happy. He started yelling at me and I didn't want to discuss it anymore. I told him we'd talk about it when he could stop screaming and Charlie and I went home to spend the rest of the night by ourselves.

Tuesday and Wednesday weren't much better. He was picking little fights and driving me up the wall. On Thursday, I'd finally had enough.

"Edward, you need to calm the fuck down," I snapped as he slammed things around in the kitchen. We were getting ready to head out to the park. Charlie and I had stopped by the house to see if Edward was ready to go. Charlie was messing around in the living room.

"I'm not going," he growled.

"You're not going to the park?"

"No, dammit, I'm not going to Seattle."

"Okay, fine, now you can stop throwing a temper tantrum. Let's go."

"Okay? You're okay with me missing out?"

"If you don't want to go, I'm not going to force you. You've been an asshole all week. The last thing I want is for you to go and be miserable the whole time. You've got a whole other week to decide if you _really_ want to go or not."

"Alice said he had no trouble calling her Auntie."

"Wait, we're talking about Charlie now?"

"She said he'd warm up to the idea, that it wouldn't take him long."

Edward was filling up two travel mugs of coffee. His hands were shaking. I approached him and gently put my hand on his forearm, stroking the soft hairs that grew there. He set the pot of coffee down and bowed his head.

"He will, Edward."

"When?"

"Give him time. He's trying to get used to the idea. He's been calling you Edward for weeks."

"Eward. He calls me Eward."

"I haven't heard him calling you much of anything lately. Have you?"

He shook his head.

"He's trying to make the transition. But he's three. You have to remember that he's only three. Is this what's had you upset all week?"

"Not the only thing."

"What else?"

He turned to face me and brushed his knuckles against my cheek. "Don't worry about it. I don't want you to worry about it."

"Are you done being an ass then?" I teased.

"It's part of my nature, Bella. I'm not sure that will ever go away completely," he smirked.

"Wonderful. Can we go now?"

"Yes. Charlie," he yelled. "Let's go."

XXXXXX

Edward remained on edge, but toned it down on Saturday. Despite his agitation with me, you would never know it when he was around Charlie. I knew that he was frustrated by the fact that Charlie was reluctant to call him '_daddy_', but he didn't once take it out on him. Not even close. So, it was with great anxiety, that I told Edward to take Charlie to see a movie. Toy Story 3 was playing at the dollar theatre and it was the only movie that I thought Charlie would actually sit through.

"Take my car," I said handing Edward the keys.

"Why?"

"Because it's easier than switching the car seat around."

"We don't need to switch anything around, I bought one yesterday on my lunch hour."

"You. . . . bought one?"

"A car seat."

I gaped at him. "How did you know what to buy?"

"The girl helped me. I told her I needed the best car seat she had that fit a thirty-five pound, three foot tall, three-year-old."

"Who installed it?" I asked.

"The guy at the fire station. That's where the girl at the store told me to take it, so I did."

I continued to stare at him.

"What?"

"You amaze me sometimes," I smiled.

He mumbled something under his breath as he turned away, but I didn't catch it. I sighed and helped get Charlie out the door. I watched as Edward carefully buckled him into his seat and then climbed in and drove away.

XXXXXX

I was completely useless all day. I was supposed to be helping Esme clean out Carlisle's office, but I kept staring at my phone like it was going to jump up and bite me.

"They'll be fine, darling," Esme soothed as I checked my phone for what must have been the thousandth time. "Edward wouldn't ever let anything happen to him. He adores that boy."

"I know. It's just, what happens if Charlie wanders off? It only takes a second."

Esme chuckled softly, "Bella, sweetheart, I would be surprised if my son even lets go of Charlie's hand at all. He was just as nervous as you are."

I blew a strand of hair that had fallen into my face to the side.

"Do you remember the first time you took Charlie out?"

"Yes. He was a week old."

"Were you nervous?"

"No."

"No?"

"I was absolutely freaking out. I was afraid that I'd set him down and leave him somewhere or forget him in the car."

Esme laughed. "Yes, well, the emotions are similar. Edward is afraid he's going to do something wrong. But you can't not do something simply because you're scared or nervous. If that was the case, then no one would ever do anything."

She was right, but it didn't make me feel any better.

Four excruciating hours later, I heard Edward's car pulling up in front of the house. I ran to the window and watched as he pulled a sleeping Charlie out of his seat. He carried him towards the house and Esme and I both headed to the front door.

Edward opened the door just as we got there.

"Did you have a good time?" Esme asked.

"Shhhh," Edward said, putting his free hand to his mouth.

"How long has he been out?"

"He fell asleep about two minutes into the drive home."

I looked at the clock. It was three.

"You fed him?"

"Yes. We had hamburgers and milkshakes from that old fashioned diner next to the theatre."

"Oh. Good."

"Can I come in all the way now?"

"Oh," Esme and I said in unison as we backed out of the way.

Edward went to the living room and started to set Charlie down on the sofa. Charlie stirred and opened his eyes. He grinned tiredly and looked up at Edward.

"I love you, Daddy," he yawned before turning over and closing his eyes again.

Edward froze. I froze. Esme froze.

"I...I love you too, buddy."

Edward kissed the side of Charlie's head and stood up, completely and utterly stunned.

"Ah..."

I couldn't help myself. It was almost like my facial muscles were reacting independently of my brain. I started grinning like the fucking Cheshire Cat.

Edward looked me directly in the eyes and swallowed really hard. And then he was gone.

I turned to face Esme. "What the hell just happened?"

Esme's eyes were glistening with tears. "Just. . . just give him a minute."

"I thought that's what he wanted."

"It is," she answered, wiping her eyes before any tears had a chance to spill over.

"Then why is he upset?"

"I don't think he's upset. I think he just got overwhelmed and didn't want us to see it."

"Oh. Should I go talk to him?"

"Let him have a few minutes to work through it first. Come sit with me, have some coffee."

About ten minutes later, Edward returned. He looked a little rough. His eyes were red, but it appeared that he had tried to wash away the evidence so I didn't comment.

"Hi," I said, getting up to pour him a cup of coffee.

"Hi." He accepted the mug and took a sip.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes."

Apparently that was all I was going to get out of him.

"I'm going to head back to Carlisle's office," Esme said, excusing herself.

"I'll be there in a minute," I told her.

Edward stood next to me, staring at his coffee.

"Did you guys have a good time at the movie?"

He nodded. "Yeah, it was good. It might have helped if I'd seen the first two, but he seemed to like it."

"Did he talk through the whole thing?"

Edward started laughing. "Nearly. He rotated between talking, jumping up and down, and eating. Once, he even tried all three, but he choked and I made him sit down."

"Well, he obviously enjoyed himself."

Edward glanced up at me. He looked almost shy. "Do you think he meant it?"

He didn't have to clarify, I knew what he was asking.

"Did you?"

"Of course I did."

"Then that's your answer, Edward. He doesn't have any ulterior motives, he says what he feels."

I set my coffee cup down in the sink. "I'm going to go help your mother finish up."

"If only the rest of us could be like that," I heard him mumble cryptically just as I walked out of the room.

XXXXX

"Riley?"

"Hey, baby, I was just thinking about you?"

"Are you busy?"

"No."

"Why's it so noisy?"

"I'm at Joe's place. They're playing Rock Band."

"Oh."

"What's up, baby? What's the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter. In fact things are really good. Charlie called Edward daddy today."

Silence.

"Riley?"

"Sorry, babe. Um, that's. . . great, I guess."

I closed my eyes and took a breath.

"So, we're coming up there for my birthday next Friday."

"You and little man?"

"No, Charlie's going to stay with Carlisle and Esme."

"Am I getting a dirty weekend?" he asked excitedly.

"No...Riley. _We _are coming up. As in me, Alice, Jasper, Rose, Emmett..."

"And Edward?"

"Yes. Assuming he wants to," I admitted.

"Why wouldn't he want to?"

"He was in a bad mood last week. Said he might not go."

"Oh, that would be a shame," Riley feigned disappointment.

"Knock it off, Ri."

"Well how am I supposed to feel, Bella? You and Charlie spend all your time with him. We can't have a single fucking conversation without him coming up. It's like you don't even remember what a fucking prick he's been to you."

"I do remember, Riley," I said raising my voice. "But he's Charlie's father. I made a stupid, juvenile mistake keeping them apart and it's my responsibility to make sure that they get a chance to be a family."

"What about me?"

"What about you?"

Silence.

"Nice. I guess I know where I stand then."

"Riley, don't. I called to see if you wanted to go out with us."

"Do you want me to go?"

I growled in frustration. "If I didn't want you to go, I wouldn't be inviting you."

And why was I inviting him? Because, regardless of the fact that I intended to end our sexual relationship, we were friends first, and I wanted desperately to preserve that if it was at all possible. I knew that having him and Edward in the same place was not the best idea, but Edward promised me he would behave himself.

"Yes, I want to go."

"Good," I breathed, even though I wasn't so sure it would be good. "As soon as Alice tells me the details, I will let you know, okay?"

"Okay. Oh, and Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

I sighed.

"I know you do."

XXXXX

I was really fucking nervous. It was finally Friday and we were all heading up to Seattle to go dancing and drinking to celebrate my birthday. We had booked four rooms at the Fairmont Olympic Hotel. Alice had booked mine. She told me I wasn't allowed to argue because it was part of my birthday present. My dad had taken the afternoon off to spend some time with Charlie. Esme and Carlisle would be taking him for the night. I think that they were all planning on having dinner together too.

Riley was going to be meeting us in the hotel lobby at eight. That, right there, was the source of my anxiety. Riley, my best friend. . . with benefits, would be meeting the Cullen kids for the first time. He was going to meet Edward, the father of my child, for the first time. This was going to be painful.

I knew that Edward was curious. Alice had told me as much. She said he wanted to meet the guy who was trying to '_steal his son_'. I had freaked out a little at that. That's not what Riley was trying to do. But Alice said that Edward was jealous. Jealous that Riley had been there since the beginning. Jealous that Riley got to see Charlie learn to roll over, to walk, and talk. This kind of shocked me. I mean, I knew that Edward absolutely adored Charlie and the two were becoming extremely close, especially since Charlie started calling him daddy, but I guess I never really thought about him being upset about missing those early milestones. It made me feel like shit that I had stolen that. No amount of pictures or videos could make up for Edward not being allowed to be there.

I loved watching Edward with Charlie. He was a different person then. A lot like the boy I used to see goofing around with his family; when his shield was down and he could just be himself. We had had more moments when the three of us would laugh and play together. It almost felt like we were a family. Almost.

When we were goofing off he would often grab me playfully. His touch was like fire. It had always been like that. His mouth would brush against my shoulder or my neck and I would break out in goosebumps. I couldn't always help my body's reaction to him and I had to distance myself so I wouldn't_ accidentally_ mount him.

But, unfortunately, we still argued. . . . a lot. He did stupid shit like letting Charlie climb one of the trees in the backyard. His response was "_he's a boy, that's what boys do_." My response was "_he's going to break his fucking leg and then I'm going to break yours_."

We fought over allowing Charlie to play video games (I thought he was too young and Edward thought he was old enough) what he ate (Edward let him eat a chili cheese hot dog and a quart of ice cream for dinner and I was awake all night trying to fix his sore stomach and then getting covered in chili cheese flavored ice cream vomit) and what kind of reading material was appropriate (Edward read to him from Maxim, enough said).

We were still in the middle of the nanny versus daycare argument for when I started working more hours, which was rapidly approaching. Edward absolutely refused to allow Charlie to go to a daycare, while I absolutely refused to allow him to have a nanny.

We had been spending too much time together. He had started avoiding being entirely alone with me though. I think in fear that we might end up like we had in the kitchen the day I discovered his nipple piercing.

Oh, God, the piercing. And the reaction he had when I touched it. That day had provided me with some nice visuals for my. . . ahem, private moments.

I guess there was nothing worse than hitting on your son's mother, because you're desperate. He had to have been getting antsy. He was so intent on proving to me that I could trust him that he hadn't even tried to start dating anyone, and I'm sure lots of girls were interested. The last time we were at the park, he got hit on by a single mom _and_ a nanny. That wasn't the reason I was so against a nanny, but it certainly didn't help his cause.

I rode to Seattle with Jasper and Alice, while Edward rode with Emmett and Rose. We both needed a break, especially if we were going to be together most of the night. On top of that, I was pretty sure that, despite his promise, Edward would not be behaving himself when it came to Riley. And Riley, well, I didn't know what to expect from Riley.

Once we checked in, we all headed to our separate rooms. I had exactly one hour before the hurricane known as Alice was scheduled to attack me. I ran a bath, adding some bubbles that I had brought along with me and sat in silence, trying to relax.

XXXXX

I rode down the elevator with Alice, who was grinning the whole way.

"My brother is going to freak," she giggled.

I glared at her. " I'm not dressed like this for your brother," I reminded her.

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that."

Alice had dressed me in a cranberry and dark taupe rib knit strapless bandage dress. It was an _amazing_ dress and I had no doubt that it cost her a pretty penny. She had paired it with a pair of four inch black Prada peep toe slingbacks and a matching clutch. Again, she was trying to kill me with the heels, but they were fuck-hot so I didn't complain. She herself was dressed in a champagne colored embroidered tulle baby doll dress with spaghetti straps and a pair of lizard embossed slingbacks. She said the color was "anthracite", whatever the hell that is. I just called it dark grey.

The elevator doors opened and we walked into the lobby and found the boys just standing around, looking at their watches and grumbling.

"Alright, alright. We're not even late," Alice chirped.

Three pairs of eyes turned towards us and three jaws dropped simultaneously.

"Jesus Christ," I heard Jasper groan.

Alice sauntered up to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. "I know, right?" she giggled. " She looks amazing, doesn't she?"

Jasper kissed her roughly on the mouth before answering. "You _both_ look stunning," he grinned at me.

I shook my head and laughed.

_Smooth Jasper._

"Wow, B," Emmett breathed. " I don't even have any words."

I just smiled at him and began fidgeting with my clutch. I didn't want to look at Edward, but I had to. He looked unbelievable gorgeous in grey slacks and dark blue button down. The look he was giving me made me anxious. I bit my lip and looked away.

I scanned the room and met a familiar face walking across the lobby. I smiled. Riley looked really good. He was dressed in a pair of black dress slacks and a blood red button down with a black skinny tie hanging loosely from his neck.

When he reached me, he slid his arm around my waist and brought me closer to him.

"Hello, gorgeous," he greeted in a low seductive voice just as his lips met mine. I startled a little at the force of his kiss. I felt his tongue touch my lips, but I didn't open my mouth to him. He pulled back and looked me directly in the eye. I could see it then. He knew. He knew what was coming.

I heard a throat clear loudly behind me and I turned to see the entire group looking at us expectantly. Rose had joined them and looked absolutely stunning in a tight navy sequined mesh one-shoulder dress that hit just above the knee and a pair of Dolce & Gabbana black patent leather pointed pumps.

" Ho-ly Shit!" Riley breathed as he stared at them. "Jesus, Bella, what do they put in the water down there in Forks?"

I wrinkled my nose in confusion.

"Is everyone coming out of there beautiful or am I just lucky?"

I laughed and shoved his chest. "Shut up."

"Uh, guys, this is Riley Carter. Riley this is Emmett Cullen, his wife Rosalie, Alice and her boyfriend, Jasper, and this is. . . . uh Edward."

Emmett took Riley's hand and shook it enthusiastically.

"So you're the guy who took care of our Bella and Little C, huh?" Emmett grinned.

Riley looked over at me and smiled. "I do my best," he said, kissing my forehead. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Edward grimace and look away.

I tensed up and closed my eyes, guilt flooding my whole body.

"Bella can pretty much take care of herself though. She has a stubborn streak," Riley chuckled, oblivious to my change in posture.

"Don't we know it," Alice chimed, elbowing Edward.

Riley shook Jasper's hand firmly and then delicately took each of the girls' hands as well. Rose cocked an eyebrow at him, but didn't say anything. When it came to Edward, I didn't know what would happen. I shoved my fingernail into my mouth and chewed on it nervously as they eyed each other. But when they shook hands. . . .nothing. Edward nodded his head in greeting and then turned away.

"We have reservations people, let's move," he announced.

Riley looked over at me and shrugged his shoulders as we followed the rest of the group toward 'The Terrace'. The Terrace was a piano bar located in the hotel that served drinks and appetizers.

It served endless starters for twelve dollars a person and we figured that since Emmett could probably eat his weight's worth, that was the way to go.

We ordered Tuna Carpaccio with painted leafs of Romaine Greens and Caesar dressing, Massive prawns with fire roasted cocktail sauce, Dungeness crab legs with cilantro lime salsa., Asparagus salad with goat cheese paper truffle greens, Kobe Beef sliders with willapa blue cheese and an order of endless artisan cheeses.

We also ordered four bottles of wine, a few beers for the guys, and a few martinis for us girls.

It didn't seem too uncomfortable. . . At first. Riley always kept a hand on me as he talked to Emmett and Jasper about a variety of things from football stats to political crap. I wasn't really listening. I was trying to figure out how to shift away from him without being too obvious. I also tried to pay attention to Alice and Rose, who were talking about their jobs. Edward remained fairly quiet. Once or twice I caught him glaring at Riley's hands as they rubbed my thigh or the nape of my neck.

_Is he really jealous? _

I kept removing Riley's hand from my thigh. After the third time, he looked over at me and furrowed his brow, but then withdrew his hand entirely. We listened to music and laughed a lot and about two and half hours later, we were grabbing a couple of taxi's and heading to Contour, one of Seattle's best night clubs.

It was loud and crowded. The music was thumping and people were dancing. It was awesome. I danced with the girls while the guys got drinks. We were grinding against each other and garnering a whole lot of attention when we were finally joined by Emmett, Jasper and Riley. I noticed that Edward wasn't with them and I looked around for him. I finally spotted him at the bar, chatting up a statuesque looking brunette and laughing. I had to look away. A pang of jealously quickly shot through me, but I shoved it away and tried to focus on Riley, who was now rubbing up against me. At first I tried to distance myself from him, but the alcohol started to take effect and it became harder and harder. And, I wanted Edward to notice. I wanted him to feel what I felt at that moment.

That's how most of the night went. Dancing and drinking, drinking and dancing. Every time I turned around, Edward was with another girl. It was starting to piss me the fuck off. It shouldn't have, but it did. There was no doubt in my mind that if he was looking for someone to break his sexual drought, he'd find it here.

Well into the night, I found myself standing alone just off the dance floor. Riley had just said something to me, but I wasn't listening. I searched around for my friends, but there were too many people and even with four-inch heels, I was still too short to see over the crowd.

I felt warm arms wrap around my waist and I jumped. At first I thought that Riley had come back. He had been so touchy-feely all night that I could only assume that it was him. But the voice that greeted me was most definitely not Riley's.

"You look beautiful tonight, Bella." He purred as he started to sway against me. His hot breath fanned across my ear and causing me to shiver. "Will you dance with me?"

"Isn't that what we're doing?" I asked, trying to control the shaking of my voice.

"No. We're swaying, we're not dancing."

I looked around trying to find Riley. I knew it would probably tick him off, but I really, really wanted to dance with Edward. I finally found Riley over at the bar talking to a tiny little blond girl.

I turned around and was greeted by that damn crooked smile.

"Is that a yes?" he asked.

"I suppose," I teased.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and his hands gripped my hips firmly. The music didn't really allow for chaste dancing. The erotic beat insisted that we move closely together.

I could feel it. Like one of those scary movies where the eerie fog creeps in and suddenly you're surrounded. Yeah, the sexual tension was incredible. We were locked into each other's gazes, moving our bodies provocatively. I was finding it hard to breathe as I writhed against him. Every time I tried to take a deep breath, it would get caught in my chest and hitch. Our hips ground against each other and I could feel him; all of him. He knew I could feel it. I saw it in his eyes that he knew, and he didn't try to hide it. He also didn't try to force it. He continued moving as he was, getting minimal friction, but it was enough to keep us going.

"I don't think your date is very happy with me," he whispered, his gaze shifting slightly to the left behind me.

"He's not my date," I said, refusing to look.

"Oh no? I don't think he knows that."

"Trust me, Edward, he knows. He's pretending he doesn't, but he does."

"Good," Edward smirked. "He needs to realize that I'm not going anywhere. _I'm _Charlie's father, not him."

"You're not being fair. He loves Charlie."

"That's fantastic," he sneered. "But Charlie's mine and he needs to remember that. He can't have my family."

I couldn't fault Edward for being upset about how close Charlie and Riley had always been. It should have been him. But his anger was misplaced.

Edward's hands slipped towards the small of my back and I felt pressure as he brought me closer to him. I might have moaned a little. He felt so good. My mouth was close to his neck and I felt an urge to suck on it. I resisted, reminding myself who it was that I was dancing with. Dancing with him before I told Riley was one thing, making out with him was a whole other kettle of fish. I had to get my body under control, because it was seriously starting to betray me.

"Incoming," Edward whispered.

"What?"

But I didn't have to wait for an answer.

"Get your hands off of her, fucker," Riley snarled, grabbing my wrist and trying to pull me to him.

"Mind your own fucking business, we're talking," Edward said in a dangerously calm voice. He didn't let go of me though.

"No, you're trying to fuck her on the dance floor."

Riley was pissed. He looked over at me, but his harsh glare didn't soften. "Whatever. You're done talking. She's mine, now give her back."

Okay, so, as a girl, it's kind of nice to have two guys fighting over you, but the tone of Riley's voice pissed me off. It was almost as if I were his possession. I knew that's not how Riley saw me, but I couldn't help but feel like a toy that he wasn't done playing with before it was snatched away from him.

"We're talking about our son, so if you don't mind." Edward's grip on my waist tightened as he tried to direct me towards the bar, but Riley wasn't giving in that easily.

"I do mind actually, you've got plenty of time to talk about him later. I need some time with my _Girlfriend,_" Riley snapped, pulling me back towards him. I winced as both men tightened their grips on me. We were starting to attract attention from those around us. Alice reached for the arm that Edward had around my waist and gently tapped his fingers. He immediately loosened his grip. He looked down at me apologetically, but when his attention was back on Riley, I could see the anger flooding his body.

"Don't pull that girlfriend shit on me. You're three hours away and you see her what? Maybe once every six weeks? She's your fucking booty call."

"Fuck you," Riley barked. "You're one to talk. After what you did to her, I should have kicked your ass the second you came back to town."

"Go ahead and try," Edward coaxed.

This was getting out of control. We now had a growing audience and the bouncers were watching us very carefully."

"Enough!" I shouted. I pried Riley's fingers from my wrist and pulled away from Edward. "Go ahead and whip'em out boys. I'm going back to the hotel."

Alice and Rose were right behind me as Emmett and Jasper stayed to make sure that there wouldn't be any fists flying. I glanced at my watch and saw that it was nearly two o'clock anyway.

"Are you okay?" Alice asked as we stood in line waiting for a cab.

"I'm fine," I clipped.

"Uh huh," Rose snorted.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

"Bella." Riley shouted as he exited the club. "Bella, baby, come on."

"No, Riley. I'm done."

He reached for me, but Rose stood in front of me, crossing her arms protectively.

"She said she's done."

Riley looked at Rose and then back at me.

"Bella, please, let me take you back to the hotel. We can talk this out."

I clenched my jaw. After the shit he pulled in there, he wanted me to let him into my hotel room. I knew that I wasn't just a booty call to him, but at that moment I sure as hell was feeling like one. He knew I was about to end it and he was trying desperately to hold on.

"Go home, Riley. I need some time by myself."

Riley huffed. "You have plenty of time by yourself, baby. I need time with you. He gets you every day."

_What. The. Fuck. He's bringing Edward into this_.

"This has nothing to do with Edward, Riley," I yelled. "This has to do with you acting like an ass."

I saw Edward, Emmett, and Jasper exit the club. They joined Alice and Rose behind me. Alice slipped her hand into mine and intertwined our fingers.

"Jesus, Bella, what is this?" he asked nodding his head behind me. "You're choosing them over me now?"

Alice squeezed my hand.

"I'm not choosing anyone over anyone else, Riley," I said quietly. "But these people are my family. You're going to have to get used to that."

"And what am I?"

"You're my best friend."

"I'm your boyfriend."

"You're my boyfriend when you want to be. You knew this wasn't going to last forever."

I needed to shut up. The alcohol was allowing me to do this the wrong way. I was going to lose him completely if I kept going. I couldn't lose him. If not for me, for Charlie.

_What have I done?_

"That's not fair."

"Bella?" Alice's voice interrupted. "Cab's here."

I let go of her hand and went to Riley. "We can talk about this later," I said kissing his cheek. His hand rested on my hip and his forehead met mine.

"Bella, please," he whimpered. The meaning behind his plea was not lost to me. I hadn't ever allowed him to think this would be more, but I hadn't discouraged his hope either. I had been selfish. I allowed myself to believe that no one would get hurt. And now, it looked like all three of us would.

"I'll call you tomorrow."

I let go of him and followed Alice and Rose into the cab. The boys jumped in the one behind us. I didn't look back as we pulled away from the curb.

"Fairmont please," Alice told the driver.

"Well that was interesting," Rose stated flatly.

I covered my face with my hands. "I am so fucked," I sighed.

"No you're not, honey," Alice cooed. "I think both boys will definitely leave you alone tonight."

I laughed so that I wouldn't cry. "That's not what I meant and you know it. I had no intention of getting laid tonight to begin with, but thanks for pointing that out."

Rose and Alice both giggled.

"Um, we can get you laid, sweetie, but it's gonna cost ya," Rose smirked.

"Are you offering, Rose? Cause you know I don't normally swing that way, right?"

The cab driver choked and coughed, causing the three of us to cackle loudly.

"Are you going to be okay tonight?" Alice asked, turning things serious again.

"I'll be fine. I suppose it could have been worse."

"Yeah, a few more drinks in you and Edward may never have seen his own hotel room," Rose snickered.

"Rose!" Alice scolded.

"Oh, my God," I groaned.

"It's not your fault, honey. Edward was trying to cause trouble. He knew what he was doing would piss Riley off," Alice soothed.

"I knew what he was doing and I let him do it. Why did I let him do that?"

I saw Rose and Alice share a look that I didn't understand.

"Don't do that," I grumbled.

"Do what?" Alice asked innocently.

"That. You're having a silent conversation about something and I don't like it. If you have something to say, just say it."

I was grumpy and I knew I was taking it out of them, but they were my friends. If I couldn't be a bitch to them, who could I be a bitch to?

A few minutes later the cab pulled up in front of the hotel and we exited, tipping him quite well for having to listen to us, even if it was a short trip. The guys were right behind us. Rose and Alice grabbed their men and made their way in. Edward lagged behind.

"Bella?"

"Not now, Edward. Please. I just want take a shower and go to bed, " I begged, looking into his those gorgeous green eyes. He nodded and followed me into the lobby.

The six of us rode the elevator in silence. Rose and Emmett exited on the second floor, Alice and Jasper on the third and Edward and I on the fourth. He walked behind me to my room and made sure that I got the door open.

"I'm sorry we ruined your night," he said quietly. I turned to face him. He was looking down at his feet and toeing the carpet of the hallway.

"You didn't ruin my night, Edward. It's just. . . . this is more complicated than I expected," I sighed. "It's fine."

He looked up at me through his dark lashes and gave me a gentle smile. "Goodnight, Bella."

"Goodnight, Edward," I said as I closed the door.

I took a scalding hot shower, letting the tension of the night wash out of me. I threw on my yoga pants and a tank top and climbed into the big fluffy king sized bed all by myself. It was heaven.

**XXXXXXXX**

**Okay. Was it smart for Bella to invite both Riley and Edward to dinner/dancing? Probably not, but she couldn't avoid the confrontation forever and it did exactly what needed to be done. Edward got jealous enough to make a move and Riley got his own dose of reality.**

**The meaning of the red carnation Edward gave Bella: "My heart aches for you" And yes, Edward knew that.**

**Check out my profile for Edward's tattoo and it's full meaning, as well as the outfits the girls wore in Seattle.**

**Don't forget to vote for the Avant Garde awards starting November 20th.**

**Next week: It's the moment(s) you've all been waiting for. Truth time!**


	18. The EndAnd the Beginning

**AN: An update? But it's only Monday. Yes, I decided to update early this week to say HAPPY THANKSGIVING. And to those not celebrating the holiday, HAPPY EARLY UPDATE. I was just worried that I wouldn't be able to get it out if I waited, due to family obligations. The down part, the next update won't be until Dec. 2nd (10 days). **

**Holy smokes. I'm a little nervous about this one so I'm not sure I have much else to say. Other than thank you for reading. **

**Thank you to Mel, my fabulous pre-reader and to Mollie, who deserves much more than just beta thanks on this chapter. **

**All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer. **

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 16: The End...And the Beginning

BPOV

"Bellllllllaaa? Belllllllaaa? Bella!"

I was brought out of a dead sleep by a really annoying sing songy voice.

"Come on Bella, I'm hungry, wake up."

I felt hands on my cheeks.

"Wakey wakey, Sleeping Beauty."

I sat straight up glaring at my tormentor.

"Oh, are you fucking kidding me, Alice?" I groaned. "I get one morning, ONE MORNING to wake up all by myself, without anyone poking me in the face or yelling at me about being hungry or accidentally peeing on the bathroom floor and I wake up to you, doing exactly that."

I slammed my body back down onto the bed and brought the pillow over my head.

"I didn't pee on the floor," Alice deadpanned.

" Arrrgg," I yelled and threw the pillow that was covering my face at her.

She giggled and I heard chuckling coming from behind me. I turned my head around to find Jasper and Edward standing in the doorway. Jasper was grinning at me and Edward had his hand over his mouth trying to stifle his amusement.

"Oh, shut up, both of you," I grumbled. "Do you make it a habit of walking in on sleeping, hung-over women?"

"No, nope, never," Jasper and Edward said in over-exaggerated tones causing my lips to twitch.

"You might as well come in and shut the door; otherwise we're going to wake the whole damn place up."

They did as I asked and Edward produced a venti coffee from behind his back.

"Madam," he said with a bow.

I couldn't help but smile at him. It was an Edward apology. "Thank you."

"My pleasure," he winked.

"Yeah, well, I'm sending Charlie to spend the night with you next weekend so I can sleep in." I joked.

Edward's eyes widened. "Really?"

Apparently he hadn't gotten my sarcasm, but he looked so excited I couldn't very well take it back.

"Uh, sure, I guess. If you think you're up to it," I said as I took a sip of my caramel macchiato and sighed.

And then it hit me. "How the hell did you get in here anyway?" I asked and glanced over at my very guilty looking friend.

"I stole your extra key card from the envelope last night."

"Alice!"

"Well, I figured just in case something happened to you and you needed help or something." She shrugged.

"Nothing was happening to me. I was by myself, enjoying the best sleep I've had in ages. Why are you here?" I nearly cried.

Alice pursed her lips together and frowned. "I was hungry. I thought you'd be hungry too," she pouted.

"Oh no, come on Alice, not the pouty face," I groaned. "Seriously, that shit's not fair. Jasper?"

"Leave me out of it," he laughed. "I just do what I'm told."

"You better believe it, baby," Alice grinned at him.

I looked over at Edward who simply shook his head at me letting me know that I was on my own.

"Well fuck you all then," I said as I climbed out of the bed.

Alice clapped her hands together.

"Oh, knock it off. I need to take a shower, are you all gonna watch or can I get a second to myself?"

EPOV

I stood there, in Bella's hotel room, staring at the small sliver of skin that had been exposed when her tank top rode up as she was getting out of bed.

_Did she just offer to let me watch her shower? Um, yes please._

I was suddenly at half mast. Luckily, I had loose jeans on so no one was any wiser. Jasper nudged me in the back and snickered. Apparently, I wasn't being very subtle in my ogling.

"All right then, come on boys, let the lady get herself together," Alice said as she tugged on both of our sleeve cuffs. I didn't move.

"Um, Edward?" Alice called.

"Can I have a minute?" I asked quietly.

Alice nodded curiously and pulled Jasper out of the room. I shut the door behind them.

Bella was looking at me with a frown.

"Hey," I said quietly.

"Hi," she responded cautiously.

"Are you okay?"

I had been concerned about her since the second I left her last night. I knew that I was a huge part of the reason for her being upset. From the moment that the elevator opened up before dinner I knew that I was in trouble. She was fucking gorgeous. I wanted to fall to my knees and worship the woman that she had become. I wanted to drag her back up to her hotel room and give her so much pleasure she'd never want to leave. But I couldn't.

After the kitchen incident, I knew that she felt it too. It wasn't just me. She wanted me. I probably could have easily seduced her. I really don't think it would have taken much. But that wasn't enough for me anymore. I didn't want just a quick fuck or a roll in the hay with Bella. I wanted more, I needed more.

Watching that fucker Riley with his hands all over her made my blood boil, but it didn't escape my notice that she kept pushing him away, discouraging his attempts to grope her. That was definitely promising. I had to control myself though. The scenario was way too familiar as were the feelings that were surging through me. I wouldn't go down this road again.

I wanted her to see me so badly, but she didn't. She never fucking saw me. Not when we were kids, and not when we were in high school. But I was going to make damn sure she saw me now.

I watched her all night. Dancing with my sister and Rose, dancing with the douche. I tried to distract myself with the female attention I was receiving, but it didn't work...at all. I never even saw their faces or heard what they said. When he left her to go to the bar at the club I saw my chance. I didn't know if it would work, I didn't know if she could ever forgive me, but I had to try. And if it pissed off Riley, even better. The feel of her body moving against mine was fucking amazing. I was so fucking turned on. I brought her close to me knowing full well that she'd be able to feel me. At first I worried that she would pull away if she knew, but she didn't. I reached down and grabbed her thigh and she fucking moaned. I could feel her hot breath against my neck and I swear I felt her lips touch my skin.

I could see Riley behind Bella. His eyes were boring into us. If looks could kill I would be have been ripped to shreds, but I was going to stand my ground. I was making my move, regardless of their relationship.

"Yes," she sighed. "I'm fine."

"What's going on with you and Riley?" I wasn't quite sure if she would shut me down for this question, but I had to ask. This man had been helping her raise my son; didn't I deserve to know who he was?

"It wasn't supposed to be like this," she said quietly, sitting back down on the bed.

"What was it supposed to be like?" I asked as I sat down next to her. It briefly registered with me that I was on a bed, with Bella, but the shuttering breath that she released drew my attention back to her.

"We agreed. We were friends; it was supposed to be easy. He swore to me that it wouldn't get complicated, but it has," she mumbled.

"Bella, I don't understand."

She rested her head against my shoulder. "Don't worry about it right now, Edward. This is something that Riley and I need to work out. I'm going to go get cleaned up and I'll meet you guys downstairs, okay?"

She didn't move immediately, instead rubbing her cheek against my shoulder and then yawning. Her hand went to my thigh as she used it to push herself up off the bed. I twitched. Not just down below, but everywhere. I don't think she noticed though. She turned around, grabbed my hand, and pulled me up off the bed.

"I'll see you in a bit," I said brushing my knuckles against her cheek.

XXXXX

"What?" I asked after I had caught Jasper staring at me for the tenth time.

"Nothing," he smiled.

"Then stop looking at me."

Jasper laughed. Alice had gone up to retrieve Bella after she reasoned that twenty minutes was too long and she must need help. Emmett and Rose hadn't joined us yet and from the heavy breathing that came through the phone when I called, probably wouldn't be for at least another half hour. Gross.

I returned to playing solitaire on my iphone, but after another two minutes I felt his eyes on me again.

"God damnit, Jasper, what the hell is wrong with you?"

"There's nothing wrong with me," he said, completely amused.

"What does that mean?"

"Do you really think you're fooling anyone?" he asked.

"Fooling? What are you talking about?"

"Oh, man," Jasper shook his head and chuckled. "You know, you and Bella, are both completely ridiculous."

"Stop talking in half sentences."

"I'm just enjoying watching this all play out. I thought for sure that last night you two would stop dancing around each other, no pun intended. Are you going to tell her?"

"Yes."

"When?"

"When it feels right. It doesn't feel right just now."

"I think she's about to end things with Riley, will it feel right then?"

"It'll feel better then."

Jasper nodded. "Well, I'll just wish you good luck now then."

"Thanks," I said balling up a paper napkin and throwing it at his head.

Ten minutes later we were joined by Alice and Bella followed ten minutes later by Emmett and Rose. Emmett was grinning from ear to ear. Gross.

BPOV

I was pacing back and forth in my front room. We had driven back to Forks just before lunch, Edward and I riding in the car with Alice and Jasper. Emmett and Rose were acting weird and none of us wanted to be in the same car as them. On top of that, since they were going home and we were continuing on to Forks, it would just be annoying to have to stop and switch cars.

XXXXXX

I had tried to get a hold of Riley all morning. I wanted to talk to him before we left Seattle, but I think that he was avoiding my calls. I didn't give up though. We needed to talk. I called him almost every hour. Each time was the same, voicemail. I was beginning to get worried.

When we got home, Charlie was napping.

"He missed you," Esme said as we came back into the living room after checking on him.

"I can imagine. I missed him too," I smiled. "Thank you so much, Esme. I promise that is the last time for a long while."

"Don't be silly, Bella. You deserve to get a night off every so often."

"She's going to let me take Charlie next weekend," Edward said happily.

Esme's eyebrows lifted. "Oh yeah?"

Edward nodded. "I figured we could do a guys night."

"I'm not sure I like the sound of that," I laughed.

"Oh, come on. I mean like me, Jasper, Dad. Em too, if he stops being weird by then."

Esme's head whipped around. "Your brother's acting weird?"

"Yes, very," Edward grumbled.

I watched as Esme's eyes lit up, but she kept her mouth shut. I had a hunch that I knew what she was thinking, but Rose had been drinking last night. Not as much as the rest of us, but I was sure I had seen her drink at least one martini, a glass of wine, and some sort of mixed drink.

"Or it could just be me and him too. Do you think it's too cold for us to camp out in the play set cabin?" he asked.

"Yes!" Esme and I said in unison.

Edward held up his hands "Okay, then," he laughed. "I can figure out something. Maybe I'll just ask Charlie."

ooooooo

Charlie woke up about a half hour later and we spent the afternoon playing in the backyard. At seven o'clock I got a phone call from Riley.

"Hello?"

"I'm on my way there."

"What?"

"I'll be there in an hour."

"Wha...Um, Shit, Riley, I've been trying to call you all day."

"Yeah, I know. Sorry about that. But, I'm heading over there. Last night was a mess and I thought I should apologize in person."

"Riley..." I started.

"Hey, look, I know I was a complete asshole last night, but I was drinking and you were drinking. I saw him taking advantage of that and just lost it. I'll make it up to you though, I promise."

I wanted to tell him no, to turn back around and go back to Seattle, but it was time to end this once and for all and it needed to be done in person. I was done being chicken shit.

I called Edward.

"Hey, can you take Charlie for a little bit?"

"Sure, what's up?"

"Nothing. Riley's coming down."

"Oh. Um..."

"I need to talk to him and I don't think Charlie should be around for that."

"Yeah, do you want me to come get him now?"

"I'm going to get him into his pajamas and then he'll be ready."

"I'm on my way."

"Thank you, Edward."

"Are you going to be okay? Are you sure you don't want me to stick around?"

"I'll be fine. I need to do this by myself."

oooooo

So Edward had picked up Charlie and taken him back to the main house, leaving me pacing and gnawing on my lower lip.

I heard Riley's car pull up and a couple of minutes later there was a knock at the door.

"Hey, beautiful," he cooed as he wrapped me up in his arms.

"Hi," I said nervously, hugging him quickly and then pushing away. "Come on in."

I shut the door and Riley took off his coat.

We walked into the living room and Riley whistled.

"This is some place," he said, letting me go. "Do I get a tour?"

"I...I guess," I said as I led him through the apartment.

"So they're just letting you live here rent free?" he asked, as he walked too close behind me, his warm breath on my ear.

"I pay the utilities. And I'm helping Esme out around the main house." I explained.

I showed him Charlie's room, the guest room.

"A piano?" he asked as he stared at the little baby grand.

"Edward plays. Charlie loves the big piano so he bought this one for Charlie. He's teaching him to play."

"How sweet," Riley said dryly as he walked out.

I tried to avoid my room, but he wasn't having any of it.

"Is this your room?" he asked.

"Yeah, it is."

"Well let me see."

I sighed and pushed the door open, walking in slightly.

"Jesus, Bella, You sure did get knocked up by the right guy," he said, grabbing me around the waist and pulling me to him.

"That was a fucked up thing to say," I scowled. "If you're going to be an asshole, you can just go the fuck back home.".

"Sorry," he mumbled. "I came to apologize. Things got out of control last night."

"Yes, they did. I shouldn't have put you in that position."

"It's just, I saw him, groping you, and you were drunk. I know guys like him, Bella. He was going to take advantage of you."

"Riley, this isn't about Edward. It's about you and me."

He pulled me closer and kissed my neck.

"Let me show you how sorry I am," he whispered. "Where's little man?"

"He's with Edward at the main house."

"Excellent."

Riley started walking us towards the bed. I couldn't let this happen. I didn't want this to happen. Not anymore.

"Do you think they'll be terribly upset when I have you screaming my name as you come?"

First of all, I had never screamed Riley's name during sex. He was good, but he wasn't that good. Second, now he was being just plain rude.

He twirled me around in his arms and laid me on the bed. His mouth crashed down on mine fiercely. He was trying to show me that we could be alright, but we couldn't, not like this. His mouth moved to my chin and then my neck while his hands groped at my shirt, trying to move it out of the way.

"Riley?" I protested.

"Baby, I want you so bad," he grunted as he thrust his hard-on into me.

I need to put an end to this.

"Riley?" I said, as I pushed his hands away and attempted to get out from underneath him.

He put his hand on the button of my pants and flicked it open. Before he could get his hand down into my panties I grabbed his wrist.

"Riley, I can't do this anymore."

He froze, his lips still against my neck. And then he pulled away and looked up at me.

"Can't do what anymore?"

"This," I said motioning my hands between the two of us.

He furrowed his brow and frowned. "Why?"

I sighed loudly.

"It's him isn't it?" He got off of me and backed up towards the bedroom door.

I scrubbed my hands over my eyes. "Yes….and no. I mean, it's about...It's not like that. It's complicated, Riley. "

"Well enlighten me, Bella, what exactly is it like then?"

I could see the anger and pain intensifying in his expression.

_Oh God, he's not going to take this well._

"He deserves a chance to be Charlie's father. I owe him at least that much. I took that away from him because of some fucked up assumption. They need to bond like father and son and…you…kind of...we had an agreement and it's not working...and now Edward...and I can't do it." I practically whispered the last few words.

He chuckled darkly and shook his head. He headed into the hallway and towards the living room. I followed him quickly, trying to adjust the clothes that he had disturbed. Then he turned abruptly, causing me to bump into him. I stumbled backwards.

"Okay, so let me get this straight. That douche bag fucked the virginity out of you, knocked you up, and never even said 'thank you' 'I'm sorry' or 'goodbye'. He screamed at you, denied paternity, and accused you of being a money hungry whore when he found out. I consoled you when you found out you were pregnant, took care of you during your pregnancy, helped you take care of Charlie and did nothing but love you both for the last four years. And you're telling me to take a hike because...what? He's threatened by me? By what we have? Our "arrangement"? What the fuck Bella?"

_Nope, this was definitely not going to end well._

"Riley….."

"No, Bella, save it." He turned to leave, but I grabbed his arm. He tried to shake me off, but I only grabbed him tighter, accidentally digging my fingernails into his flesh.

"Ow, fuck."

"I meant I can't fuck you anymore Riley, not that I want you to take a fucking hike." I was yelling now. "We never should have crossed that line. I knew it back then, but you fucking promised me that this wouldn't happen. You swore to me that if things changed, it would all be okay."

"Well, I was fucking wrong. I don't know what you want me to say. That I'm perfectly okay with sitting by while you two play house? He's never going to fucking love you, Bella. Not like I do. Once he gets over the novelty of having a kid, he's going to resent the fact that you've forced him into being a daddy. And you know very well that when you screw up, his family will take Charlie away because they're rich and powerful and can give him anything he wants. Maybe if you're really lucky, they'll keep you on as a nanny."

Something caught my eye and I looked up to see Edward standing in the doorway. Riley followed my gaze and glared at him before turning back to me.

"Don't expect me to wait for you, Bella. All he wants is your pussy, I guarantee it. That's all assholes like him ever want. You've been a challenge for him, you're a conquest. He'll seduce you and tell you he cares, but when he decides he's had enough of you; once he finds something sweeter or tighter, he'll abandon you... again. Only this time, you're bringing Charlie into it and he's the one who will suffer the most."

The sound of Edward's fist hitting the wall startled the shit out of me.

"Dude, get the fuck out of my house," Edward snarled.

Riley smirked and turned back towards me. "See, it's his house Bella, their house. They'll never let you forget how much better they are than you."

Edward took two long strides towards us. "I said, Get. The Fuck. Out."

The tears were streaming down my cheeks. "Riley, please," I begged.

"Please what? He laughed humorlessly. He grabbed my arm roughly and pulled me to him. "You mean nothing to him. You never have. Don't let him turn you into a fool."

The next thing I knew, Riley was pulled away from me violently. He collided with the opposite wall. Edward stood in front of me protectively.

"Don't ever fucking touch her again," Edward roared.

"Or what?" Riley sneered, pushing himself off the wall. He puffed out his chest and stood toe to toe with Edward. "What are you going to do? Fuck me up like you did her? You abused her. You may not have hit her, you may not have raped her, but you might as well have. You destroyed her, motherfucker. She pretends to be strong, but she's not. She cries in her sleep, did you know that?" He didn't wait for Edward to answer. "Of course not, because you couldn't even be bothered to stick around, could you? Fuck and run, that's what you do best."

"Riley, stop," I cried, trying to push my way around Edward.

"You don't want him to hear, Bella? Really? Why not?"

"Don't do this." I begged. But he didn't stop.

"I took care of her when she was scared and alone. I cleaned up your mess. I made love to her, over and over and over again. And she loved every second. Can you say the same?"

I could feel Edward shaking. He was holding onto me, but I think it was to hold himself back.

Riley's lips twitched. "I felt that baby kick in her stomach, I saw his heartbeat during the ultrasound. I held that little boy only days after he was born and I've always loved him. I am the only father that little boy has ever known and I am more his father than you could ever be."

That was it. Edward snapped. He launched himself forward, shoving Riley against the wall.

I could feel myself crumbling in horror as the words came out of Riley's mouth. I had sworn to Edward that Riley hadn't been trying to take on the father role. But that's exactly what he was doing. How had I not seen it? How could I have been so blind? What had I done to these men? To my son?

"Charlie is mine," Edward said in a very low, very threatening voice. "You will never, ever be his father. I love that child more than you could possibly imagine and he calls _me_ daddy."

Edward looked at me for a second and then leaned in close to Riley's ear. I couldn't hear what he said, but the look on Riley's face told me that he wasn't happy. When Edward let him go and backed up towards me again, I thought that maybe it was done, but I was wrong.

Riley pulled his fist back quickly and slammed it into the side of Edward's face. Edward stumbled backwards knocking me into the table. I gasped as a sharp pain radiated through my back.

Edward turned briefly. "Are you okay?"

"No," I cried, because I wasn't. I was about to completely lose my shit.

Edward turned and charged towards Riley. Riley went to throw another punch, but Edward grabbed his arm and wrenched it around his back. He wrapped his arm around Riley's neck and I heard him choke and gasp.

"Stop," I screamed. "Oh my God, Edward."

"I'm only going to tell you this once," he growled in his ear. "It's time for you to leave. You are no longer welcome on this property."

Edward let Riley go and shoved him towards the already open front door.

He turned to face me one more time as he grabbed his coat, shook his head and stormed out of the apartment. Edward walked over and slammed the door shut. I collapsed backwards onto the sofa, covered my face with my hands and sobbed as quietly as I could. I didn't want anyone to see me like this, much less Edward. I turned my head away from him, trying to ignore the fact that he was slowly approaching me. I felt his body heat as he bent down. He placed his hand firm, but gentle on the back of my head and stroked my hair. He let me cry.

After a few minutes his hand moved underneath my hair to rub circles on my back.

"Where's Charlie?" I asked softly.

"He's asleep in his room at the house. Alice has the baby monitor, just in case."

I nodded.

"You know he's wrong, Bella," his smooth velvety voice spoke softly. "Don't let him do this to you."

I sniffled and tried to compose myself. I wiped the tears from my eyes and cheeks and turned to face him. "Do I?" I asked. "Do I really? How do I know Edward? How do I know that the second I screw up, you won't hire the most expensive lawyer out there to take him from me? What happens when you get married and have a wife who either doesn't want to deal with me and Charlie or just plain wants me out of the way? You'll resent us both. Riley's right. He's always loved us. He's always taken care of us, protected us. He would give us a good life."

I stood up quickly. Edward's hand fell from my back. "I need to stop him."

Edward grabbed my upper arm gently as he stood up to his full height. "You really have no idea do you?" he whispered.

_No idea?_

"Do you love him?" he asked. I looked up into his face, which was slightly strained.

"Yes. Of course I do. He's been my best friend for four years," I said, turning away.

"That's not what I meant Bella."

I knew what he meant. "I think that maybe in time, I could grow to love him."

I tried to pull away, but Edward pulled me back. This time I was standing closer to him. I would have to look up to see his face, but I didn't want to see it, so I kept my head down.

"You deserve better than that," he said gently. "And for the record, you are an amazing mother, Bella. I would never even consider taking Charlie away from you. I would never, could never, love a woman who didn't accept you and Charlie." He placed his finger under my chin and lifted it so that he was looking into my eyes. "I love Charlie, with everything that I am, and you gave him to me. Regardless of how it happened or how I've behaved, I will always be eternally grateful to you for what you've given me."

I could feel fresh tears building in my eyes and they tumbled over mercilessly. Before I had a chance to do or say anything else, Edward pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around my back. The embrace was warm and comforting and I couldn't help but melt into him. I felt pressure on the top of my head and realized that he was pressing his lips against my hair.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled into his chest.

"For what?" he asked as his hand started running up and down my back.

"For everything. I never gave you the chance. You...you missed out on so much, Edward. And no matter how badly I want to, I can't go back and give that to you...or Charlie." I choked back a sob.

He stopped rubbing my back and pushed me away by my upper arms so that he could look at me, but I kept my eyes trained to the floor.

"Bella, look at me," he commanded gently.

I shook my head, not really wanting him to see the depth of my vulnerability.

"Please," he pleaded softly.

I didn't want to do it, I really didn't, but something in his voice made it impossible to say no to him.

"No more apologies. There have been too many of those. Neither one of us will ever feel like we've apologized enough and all it's doing is keeping us in the past. There's nothing we can do to change it."

He stared intently into my eyes. His fingers were under my chin and he moved closer. We were so close I could feel his breath against my face. He continued his powerful gaze and I felt weak, unable and unwilling to stop what happened next. He closed the distance and his lips were on mine.

EPOV

I couldn't help myself. She was right there. There had been so much hurt and pain and regret between us, but now, she was in my arms and I wanted her to stay there. I had always craved Bella, even through all of the bullshit of the last couple of months, I found myself unable to avoid thinking about her. I watched her with Charlie. I watched her all the time. Anyone paying attention would have easily seen it. She was still that girl; the girl I had grown up with. She was kind and loving. She was a little less shy and a whole lot stronger, but that just made her even more alluring. I still wanted her, all of her.

I moved my lips against hers for a moment before I realized that she was frozen. I inhaled shakily, removing my lips from hers regretfully.

"Fuck Bella, I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking. I just…."

I was abruptly cut off by her lips returning to mine as though they were magnetized. She grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me to her desperately. I didn't resist. She was massaging my lower lip in between hers gently and then I felt her tongue sweep over it, asking me to take the kiss deeper. I obliged her, opening up my mouth a little wider and wrapping my tongue around hers. She let out a little moan and my body was screaming at me to bring her closer. I reached up and cupped her face in my hands, wrapping my fingers around to the back of her neck and letting my thumbs rest along her jaw. She tilted her head and we both began moving our mouths more aggressively. My tongue caressed her soft, plump lips before gliding over her teeth and then finding it's mate.

We continued that way for a few minutes before a silent understanding passed between us and we slowed down. I withdrew my tongue and just sucked on her top lip.

"Tell me," I breathed heavily. "Tell me that you didn't do that because of him."

She shook her head slightly. "Not because of him," she whimpered.

"Tell me you wanted it too," I begged, barely passing my lips over hers.

"I did."

I moved my lips against hers again, making the kiss more sensual, relishing in the way she felt. This is the first kiss I wanted to remember. One not marred by alcohol, drugs, or anything else.

"I never wanted to hurt you," I whispered as I rested my forehead against hers.

"I know," she sighed.

"I was so angry. So angry that I wanted you so much. So angry that after resisting you for so long, I couldn't control myself."

My hands were still cradling her face. I kissed her forehead, her eyes, her nose and her cheeks.

"I took it out on you."

I pulled her to me again, nuzzling into her neck.

"I didn't realize I was hurting you. God I….I..."

"Shhhh," Bella soothed. "I thought we were done with apologies." She was running her hands through my hair, holding me to her.

I needed to tell her. "Bella, I need you to know."

"It's done Edward."

"No, I mean, yes, it's done, and I won't apologize anymore I promise, but there are things that you don't understand. That you never knew."

I backed up to the sofa and sat down, pulling her into my lap. I kissed her softly behind her ear.

"Okay."

I took a deep breath and let it out against her neck. She tilted her head almost unconsciously and I smirked against her skin.

"Shut it," she giggled and then hiccoughed.

I planted another kiss against her jugular and then brushed my nose against her jaw.

"When you turned fifteen, I was going to ask you out."

Bella's head jerked a little. "What?" she asked abruptly.

I kissed her neck again, trying to soothe her. "When you moved here and Alice brought you home for the first time, I nearly lost my shit. I had my first wet dream to a vision of you," I admitted, a little embarrassed.

"Really?"

I nodded. "But I was too young, too shy to do anything but pretend to ignore you and tease you. And you acted as if I didn't exist. I waited and waited for you to notice me. To see me as something other than your best friend's annoying brother, but you never did."

I cleared my throat and shifted Bella in my lap.

"One day, I just got tired of waiting. I told Alice that I wanted to go out with you, but I already had a reputation at that point. I lost my virginity to Regina Faygler when I was fourteen, she was seventeen. She played with me for weeks, seducing me to the point where I would have done anything she asked. It's not that I ever really cared for her, but she was willing to touch me and let me touch her. One day she drove me to an empty clearing in the woods and let me take her in the backseat of her Toyota. After that, I was a little….insatiable. It didn't matter that I wasn't in a real relationship. I thought that if you didn't want me, at least somebody did, even if it was only for sex. But, after a few more weeks, Regina got tired of me and passed me along to her friends. I didn't really know what happened, other than that she just didn't want me anymore either. I got passed around like a fucking toy. There were never any feelings involved, no kissing, and no commitment. It felt good because I was getting my release without having to do it myself, something most of my friends weren't getting at that point. But sometimes, I felt so fucking disgusting, dirty, like I was nothing more than their whore. I had developed early and I think most of them forgot how young I was, not that it would have mattered to them anyway; they were getting what they wanted from me."

Bella took a deep breath and I looked down at her making sure she was okay before continuing.

"I had also figured out that girls were easily willing to give me blowjobs without me having to do anything. So, I got them...frequently."

Bella sniffed and squirmed a little. I knew that hearing some of this was going to make her uncomfortable, but I had to keep going.

"Alice begged me. She cried and pleaded for me not to do that to you, to her. She said that I would break your heart like I did with all the other girls and then she would lose her best friend. I didn't understand her fear. I hadn't ever broken anybody's heart. Those girls used me just as much as I used them. It was sex, only ever sex. I avoided girls who expressed interest for more, hence my no virgin rule. I didn't ever want to put someone in the position that I had been in when I lost my virginity. And I could never offer them more. I explained how long I had wanted you. I promised her that I would be good to you, that I would love you and no one but you, but she got pissed. She threatened to tell my mom that I was drinking and having sex. She said she would never speak to me again if I went anywhere near you. She said that you didn't deserve to be treated like one of my whores. I didn't want that for you. I didn't want anyone to see you like that just because you were with me, so I backed off."

Bella was silent. She was holding my hand and drawing circles on the back. I shivered at the sensation. She noticed, assuming that I was cold, and pulled the fleece blanket from the back of the sofa, covering us both completely.

"God Bella. I watched you for years. I couldn't just let you go, no matter how hard I tried. I realized that I had made mistakes with all those girls, but I didn't know how to fix it. After what Alice said, I knew that I didn't stand a chance. So I started building up walls to protect myself from the pain of knowing that I had fucked up any possibility of ever being with you. I was a kid, just a kid who loved a girl, who would never love me back. It hurt so much that I swore I would never let anyone possess my heart the way you did. Every time you went out with a guy those walls got thicker, because they were good enough, and I wasn't. I wanted to bash their faces in. I was so fucking jealous. And Mike Newton? Christ, I almost killed him. If it weren't for Alice and her death glare I probably would have. Every time he touched you I envisioned ripping his fingers off one by one. But you were good and pure and perfect and I was tainted and rotten, never good enough for a real relationship, only raw, emotionless fucking. You needed so much more than what I had to offer. The only way I could protect myself was to get angry; to treat you like you didn't matter. It was the only way to keep myself detached from the fact that my heart was in pieces. Even after I started dating Tanya." I grimaced at the thought of that bitch. I wondered if I should tell Bella about what Tanya had done, but decided that I would leave that discussion for another day. This was about us, not her.

"But you loved her," Bella said sadly, not looking up at me.

"No. I didn't. She was just another distraction, Bella. We fought so much I'm not even sure if we actually liked each other," I admitted.

"Then why did you stay with her? Even after you left?"

"I don't honestly know. Why does anyone ever stay in a relationship that's completely miserable and unhealthy? There were so many reasons. It was expected. Everyone was constantly telling us how perfect we were together. And I guess we were. We were both self-absorbed, soulless people. With each other, there was never anything to prove, no reason to be better. We just got comfortable. It was easier to stay than it was to leave. She followed me to school. I never asked her to come."

"But you had the other girls." It was not a question.

"Yes. I didn't cheat on her in the beginning, but she was always accusing me. I realized that even she didn't think I was worth a normal relationship."

I laughed a little. "She hated you with a passion."

"Why me?" Bella asked looking up at me. "I don't think I ever said more than ten words to Tanya Denali.

"Because you practically lived with us. My parents loved you, my siblings loved you. She was positive that you had a crush on me and that I would cheat with you during one of Alice's sleepovers."

I rubbed my fingers up and down Bella's arm, relishing how soft her skin was.

"I always wanted you Bella, only you. That night, the night of the party, I was trying to stay fairly sober. I thought that maybe I would get a chance to talk to you, to finally tell you how I felt. I had only had a few shots as a little bit of liquid courage, but then I saw you with Mike. He had his hands all over you. It pissed me off that he could have you and I couldn't. I knew how he treated you. I heard him in the locker room. That's why I thought you…uh, that you weren't a virgin. Mike pretty much told us all that he nailed you in the Chief's house."

"That stupid shit," Bella growled.

"Yeah, that was pretty much my reaction when he said it too."

"I took a few more shots to cool off. And then a few more. And then someone offered me a hit of coke. I'd never done that shit before, but I just decided 'why the hell not'? There was no reason to stay sober anymore."

I swallowed thickly at the memory of the immediate surge of adrenaline that intensified everything.

"I thought I was on top of the fucking world, but I was also so fucking agitated. I went up to my room and found you in my bed. I thought I was dreaming at first. God knows that I'd fantasized about you in my bed a lot over the years. But then you started talking in your sleep. I don't remember what you said, but it shocked the shit out of me."

I held Bella tighter and brushed my lips against her shoulder.

"When I had you against the wall, I realized that it might be my last chance to tell you how I felt. That's why I kissed you. And you responded to me so well. I never had any intention of fucking you that night. I just wanted you to know, but I couldn't control myself. There was so much fucking adrenaline running through my system I thought I was going to explode. And then we were on the bed and I tasted you and it was the sweetest fucking thing I had ever had in my entire life. It was just another log on the fire. I could have been feasting on you for years and I had been denied. I thought 'I don't want to be denied any more'. I expected you to stop me. To save us both from fucking everything up, but you didn't. And then that spark that had been smoldering for six very long years just exploded. You wouldn't have said no. You would have been mine. All of the sudden I got inexplicably and outrageously angry. At you, at me, at Alice, at Mike, at Tanya. Pretty much everyone who had played a part in keeping me from you. But deep down, I knew that if I hadn't fucked up so much to begin with, you could have loved me too. "

I could feel the tears slipping from the corners of my eyes. I had held this in for so long, never telling another living soul. Even refusing to admit a lot of it to myself. Bella held me tighter, winding one hand around my waist and the other one into my hair, scratching my scalp.

"I was fucked up Bella. You have to understand that. Both physically and emotionally. I didn't realize what I was doing to you. I couldn't look at you, because I was weak. I was afraid that by looking into your eyes as I took you that I would be reminded of how unworthy I really was."

"But the next morning, at the coffee shop?" she squeaked.

"I was so embarrassed and so fucking upset. I had done it all wrong. I went to Tanya's, because I had no where else to go. Nothing happened. She didn't even know I was there until the next morning. When I woke up on her couch, much more sober and clearheaded, I realized how brutal I had been. I knew that you would be in pain. Even the most seasoned of girls would have been aching with what I had done to you. I'm a big guy, and you are just so small."

"That's an understatement," she whispered so lightly that I don't think I was meant to hear her.

"But when Alice told me that you were a virgin, I….I broke. Inside, I broke. I couldn't comprehend it. And I did what I have always done. I got angry and I ran away. I tried to pretend that it didn't happen. I thought that when you came to our going away party that I could make it all better. Start over. But you never came and I realized that I had broken you too."

"If I had known, about Charlie, Bella. I would have stayed. I would have come back," I whispered through my tears.

After a few minutes of us both digesting my confession I spoke again, very quietly.

"I would have loved him," I murmured. "I would have loved you."

It was at that moment that I watched Bella completely crumble. She buried her head into my neck and sobbed. I could feel her tears drenching my t-shirt, but I didn't care. I had finally told her. It had been nearly ten years and I was finally free of my secret. We cried together for what seemed like hours. Finally, I drifted off to sleep with her still cradled in my lap. The last thing I heard was Bella's soft voice whispering.

"I would have loved you too."

XXXXXX

**AN: Well shit, I'm still freaked out so I guess I'll leave it all up to you guys. **

**Again, this is another hugely important chapter so I would love, love, love to hear what you all have to say. Reviews will, as always, get teasers (make sure you're signed in please, otherwise I can't get back to you). It may take me a little longer than usual b/c of the holiday, but you will get them. :o)**

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**Next Chapter: Bella and Edward start to explore what could be and that smell of citrus is getting stronger. **

**I will try to get back to recs next chapter as well. Thank you. **


	19. Only You

**AN: I really don't know how this chapter got so long.**

**Can I just tell you A-MA-ZING. The reviews for last chapter made my heart do a little happy dance. 350 reviews, not to mention the reviews for past chapters. I'm almost at 3000 people. You have no idea how that makes me feel. When I started this, I asked on my profile how I could become one of those writers with thousands of reviews. I appreciate everyone who has rec'd me whether it be on a blog, a forum, or just by word of mouth. **

**Thank you to Mel for pre-reading and preparing me for impact. LOL. Thank you to Mollie, my partner in crime. Seriously, she stays online with me until midnight every night leading up to posting day to help me get it juuuuuust right.**

**Stephenie Meyers owns it.**

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 17: Only You

BPOV

_"I would have loved him. I would have loved you."_

Edward's words took my breath away. I choked and sputtered and completely melted down in his arms. I had spent years thinking that he hated me, that he would have turned away from us. I had let my fear and resentment guide my decisions only to find out that everything I thought I knew was wrong. Now, he had spilled his heart; presented it to me on a silver platter without knowing how I would react. I had to be honest with him, with myself.

"I would have loved you too," I whispered into Edward's neck. His collar was soaked with my tears and snot, but not once did he let go or pull away, instead only holding me tighter. Within minutes I felt his whole body completely relax into mine, his head slumping slightly and his breath got deep and even. I sat in silence, curled up into him, not wanting to ever move.

I had never anticipated the night to turn out like it had. Riley's reaction had absolutely destroyed me. I don't know what I expected. I knew that he would be upset and that he would probably blame Edward. There was nothing that I could say that would convince him otherwise. He was so, so vicious, knowing exactly how to get to me, triggering every insecurity I had.

When Edward began to kiss me, I froze solid. It took me a minute to even realize that those gorgeous lips were actually on mine, but he stopped before I got a chance to reciprocate.

He pulled back and I struggled to get it back before he thought I didn't want it, because, I really, really wanted it. The way our tongues danced together made my whole body blaze with absolute desire, but there was something more. I couldn't quite figure it out, but I could feel it. It was in the way he held me to him, the way his thumbs brushed along my jaw. I poured myself into that kiss, willing him to understand everything that I couldn't say in words, but he didn't. He thought that I had kissed him as a reaction to what had happened with Riley. This is what our lack of communication had done to us. We couldn't keep doing this to each other, to ourselves, to Charlie.

I listened as Edward told me of his past. How he became who he was; how I unintentionally played a part in his self loathing, which inevitably led to what had happened between us. Edward's confession left me in pieces. He had loved me. He had always loved me. If I had known, God, if I had known. He thought that I had ignored him, that I never saw him. I was going to have to tell him how wrong he was. But it would have to wait. This was his confession, not mine.

I had never known exactly what he had gone through with those girls. I remembered Regina Faygler. Edward, Alice and I were only in eighth grade when she was a senior. It's not like we would have run in the same circles. How she managed to get her hands on Edward I had no idea. I recalled that Emmett was on the football team with her younger brother Ryan, who spent a significant amount of time at the Cullen house before they moved away. I also remembered running into Sasha Pierce, one of Regina's best friends coming out of Edward's bedroom on his fifteenth birthday. She had to have been eighteen at the time. Fucking bitch should have been arrested. She smiled at me as she adjusted her clothes and I felt an overwhelming urge to claw her eyes out, but had been distracted by Edward following her out into the hallway as he pulled his shirt on over his head. He completely ignored me, like I wasn't even there. I figured he was just a player, but after everything that he had told me, he was probably just embarrassed that I had caught him.

I was frantically running over all of the girls I had ever seen him with in my head and wondering when the tables had turned and he became the seducer. I had to stop myself when my head began to spin and my heart to ache. There was no point in dwelling on it any more. It had been two months and the only hint of girl action I had seen or heard of was Jessica and he had dealt with her. At least, I was pretty sure he had. I suppose he could have been hiding it, I had asked him to keep it away from Charlie. But we had been spending so much time together and he had kissed me and held me and...and I was going to make myself crazy by thinking about it. On top of that, who was I to judge? I had spent the last year ignoring all the signs that Riley wanted more simply to satisfy my own physical needs. I was far worse than Edward was.

I ran my fingers through his hair. My chest felt tight and I took in a choppy breath as I thought about what he had said. He spent all those years believing that no one could love him because of what he had done. Because he had succumbed to his hormones in the most profligate way possible. I would have said that was silly, but to a teenage boy, maybe it wasn't. If it had been a girl who had been taken advantage of by older boys, we would have all felt sorry for her. We would have understood why she felt like a whore and comforted her. Why was it so different just because he was a boy?

I didn't understand his relationship with Tanya, at all. I got that she met his physical needs, but she must not have done it too well or he wouldn't have strayed. I got that he didn't think he deserved better, but to stay with someone who made you feel so completely miserable and worthless? That, I couldn't understand. All he did was guarantee that the cycle of unhappiness and self degradation continued.

And his explanation of what happened that night? How could he possibly think that I wanted Mike Newton? I spent most of the night fighting off his advances. If he had been paying any attention to me he would have seen that. Even drunk off my ass, I knew that Mike wasn't what I wanted. Mike Newton was inevitably why I ended up in Edward's bed to begin with.

I'm not going to lie, it scared the shit out of me when he said that he had done coke, but it explained a lot. The erratic behavior, the bursts of anger. I hoped to God that he wasn't still doing that shit.

I stared at his face, particularly his nose. It looked like a healthy nose, not one rotten and decayed by cocaine. But he could have been smoking it.

I felt myself starting to hyperventilate. Edward stirred with the movement. His head nuzzled against my shoulder and his arms squeezed me like I was a security blanket.

I needed to stop. Edward wouldn't do that. He wouldn't put Charlie at risk like that. I had to have faith in him. We had come too far for me to start doubting him.

There was no way for me to process everything that he had told me. All I knew was that we had made far too many mistakes. We were both guilty of making stupid assumptions and allowing misconceptions to make our decisions for us. And Alice, well she had played a key role in this whole debacle. The more I thought about it, the more upset I became.

I looked up at the clock on the wall and saw that it was barely ten. Alice would still be awake. I had questions that needed to be addressed immediately. There was no way I was going to be able to sleep without talking to her.

I shifted out of Edward's lap, pulling the blanket with me. He grunted and tried to hold onto me, but he stayed asleep. I regretted having to leave the warm comfort of his arms, but I needed my answers. Once I was out, he slumped against the arm of the sofa. I pulled his legs up and out so that he was laying down, took off his shoes and socks and replaced the blanket so that it covered him.

I pulled on my coat and made my way to the main house. Alice was in the living room with Jasper.

"Hey," she smiled. "What's up? Everything okay?"

I stared at her with a solemn look on my face, trying to gather my thoughts before I spoke. She must have sensed something was up. Her smile faded and a nervous expression appeared.

"Um, Bella? What happened?"

"You knew," I accused.

"I knew what?"

"You've known for at least eight years that he loved me and you said nothing?"

Alice's jaw dropped and her face blanched.

"Oh, God, Bella. I..."

I felt a tear slip from the corner of my eye. "How...how could you do that?"

"I..."

"What gave you the right to make that decision for me?" I wasn't yelling, but I wanted to be. There was a house full of people though, including my son, and I didn't really want an audience.

"He told you?"

I nodded.

"Bella, sugar, it wasn't just Alice, I knew too."

I glared at Jasper. "Did you threaten to turn on him if he ever pursued me?"

"No, but..."

"Then, this has nothing to do with you."

Alice turned to face Jasper. "It's okay Jazz, I knew this was coming. Just, let us talk, okay?"

Jasper nodded, kissed Alice on the side of her head and left the room. On his way out, he stopped in front of me. He set his hand on my shoulder and I covered it with my own to at least let him know that I wasn't angry with him.

When he was gone I focused my attention back on Alice.

"He would have hurt you," she whispered.

"How do you know that, Alice? Are you psychic? Did you see it in your crystal ball?"

"You know how he was. He wasn't a one woman type of guy, Bella. I was trying to protect you."

"You were trying to protect yourself!"

"Of course I was, I was fifteen," she said forcefully. "My sex addicted brother wanted a piece of my best friend. He never kept girls, at all. You were around enough, you saw what he was like. It was all a game to him. He pretended he was interested and once he got what he wanted, he threw them away like they were fucking trash. If he had done that to you, I would have lost you. I couldn't let that happen to either of us."

"Alice, he told you how he felt about me. Why would he have admitted that to you if I were nothing but a conquest?"

"He would have said anything to convince met to help him get to you."

"He confessed to you and you blew him off," I argued, feeling completely and utterly frustrated with her.

"I didn't know at the time that he was telling the truth," she said choking back a sob. "I didn't find out until later, when Jasper pointed out the way he was looking at you, but that same night he went home with Lauren. Jasper swore to me that regardless of what he did, he was in love with you, but I couldn't take back what I said. After a few years, I figured he'd moved on, especially once he started dating Tanya. I'm so sorry, Bella. I didn't know. I should have believed him, I know that now, but back then I was just so afraid that he would hurt you and then you wouldn't want to be my friend any more. You wouldn't have been able to be around him, or me, if he took your virginity and then walked away."

"He did that anyway," I finally yelled.

Alice's eyes glazed over a little and she squeaked. "Oh, oh, God, he did. I didn't...I didn't even think about that."

"Shit, Alice, we could have been happy. If I had known that he loved me, it wouldn't have happened like that."

I gasped as the realization of what I had just said hit me. If I had known, it wouldn't have happened. And if it hadn't happened, I would never have had Charlie.

"Don't get me wrong, Alice, I don't regret Charlie, not even a little bit. He is my whole world, but at the very least you could have told me when you discovered I'd had your brother's baby. You stood there and accused first me and then him of being selfish and spiteful. I've always believed that what I had done was for the best. I should have thrown myself down at his feet and begged for mercy. But instead, I took all those years of longing, jealousy and feelings of rejection, added them up to a fucked up night of passion and pain and made him hurt even more. And all that time, you made him feel like he was an awful person for being pissed off at me and at the situation when you knew there was more to it."

The tears were, once again, pouring from my eyes uncontrollably. Alice was standing in front of me, mirroring me, but her face registered shock as well.

"Wait. You...you...you liked him?" she stuttered. "Back then? You had a crush on my brother?"

I blinked rapidly, trying to clear my vision. "It was more than a crush, Alice."

"But you never told me. Why wouldn't you tell me something like that?"

"There was no point. I didn't think he could ever reciprocate." I sighed heavily. "It doesn't matter, Alice. I'm tired of constantly re-living mistakes. I'm going to go on the belief that everything happens for a reason. Charlie is my reason."

Alice swiped at her eyes. "Are you mad at me?"

Was I mad at her? Part of me was, but I knew I had to move beyond it. Being angry wasn't going to solve anything. All it would do would cause more unnecessary drama, and honestly, I had already had enough drama to last me a lifetime.

I looked at her in defeat. "I don't have the energy to be mad anymore," I said shaking my head. "Right now, I just want to go back to my apartment and go to sleep."

Alice threw her arms around my waist and hugged me tightly. I returned her embrace tightly.

"Edward said Riley came down," she said smushing her face into my shoulder.

"He did," I confirmed.

She lifted her head and her eyes widened. "You didn't leave them alone together did you?"

"Ha," I scoffed. "Absolutely not. Riley went home."

"Are you okay?"

"I ended it. He got upset. They got into a fight, and he left."

"Edward and Riley got into a fight?"

"Yes. It was not pretty."

"Well, I know my brother's temper. Tell me he didn't hurt him too badly."

"Actually, it was Edward who ended up a little on the bruised side."

"No way," she laughed letting me go and backing up a little.

"Uh huh. I think he'll survive though."

"Wow."

"I know, right?" I snorted. "Okay, I'm seriously exhausted. I'm going to get Charlie and go home."

She nodded and offered me a very genuine smile. "I am sorry."

"I know you are, Alice. I really do appreciate that, but please... if there ever is a next time, please, just...stay out of it, okay?"

She nodded sadly and sat back down on the sofa.

When I got to the guest room, I entered it quietly and approached the bed. I knelt down and brushed a rouge hair from Charlie's forehead. I couldn't bear to move him. He was getting heavy and it was pretty cold outside. He would most certainly wake up. I kissed him softly and tucked the covers around him.

"Alice," I called as I returned to the living room.

"Yes?"

"Can you keep a hold of the baby monitor? He looks too peaceful to disturb. I'll just come get him first thing in the morning."

"Sure, Bella, but can't I give it to Edward?"

"He's fast asleep on my sofa. I'm going to just let him stay there."

"Oh," she smiled. "Okay, I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight."

When I got back to the apartment, Edward was still fast asleep, snoring lightly. I walked up to him and couldn't help, but laugh. He had a section of hair hanging in his face that was almost identical to the one on Charlie. I bent down and swept the hair back as softly as possible. I tilted my head and ran my thumb over his stubbled cheek. I wanted to crawl back into his arms and tell him that I loved him, that I had always loved him. He talked about the walls that he had created to protect himself, but I had done the same thing. It's just that I was having a tough time bringing mine down. It was only when I slept that they completely crumbled.

I ghosted my lips over his and watched his eyelids flutter before standing up and heading to bed. He had loved me once, he had said that. I didn't know if he meant that it was too late for us now or if we still had a chance. I wanted a chance. I wanted the opportunity to earn his love, to deserve his love. And I was willing to take a wrecking ball to those walls if that's what it took.

EPOV

The first thing that I noticed as I slowly re-entered consciousness, was that I was not in my own bed. I didn't have to open up my eyes to know that. Something felt off. I tried to shake the feeling thinking that maybe I had just had a weird dream, but it wouldn't go away.

After a few minutes I pried my eyes apart and nearly shit myself. Charlie was sitting on the floor directly in front of me staring intently.

"Holy cr...ahhh," I startled. "Charlie, what are you doing?"

"Mooooommy, he woked up," he sang and then flashed me a cheeky grin. "Hi, Daddy."

_I will never get tired of hearing him call me that._

I chuckled as I sat up, rubbing my eyes with my palms and then stretching my arms over my head. I needed to take a few minutes to...well, to calm myself down from my never-ending morning problem. I was wearing jeans, but still, I didn't want to traumatize the poor boy.

"Good morning, buddy. Where's your mama?"

He lifted his hand and pointed towards the kitchen. "She's in dere. I not allowed to turn on the TV until you waked up."

I grabbed the remote control from the coffee table and turned on the television. "Do you know what channel?"

He nodded and took the remote from me. I stood up and ruffled his hair as I made my way to the kitchen. I was barefoot, something I hadn't been when I fell asleep. In fact, I was missing something else that I had fallen asleep with too, but I suppose I couldn't expect for her to spend the night in my lap. And Charlie was home, which meant that, at some point, she had gone to get him. I walked groggily towards the smell of cooking meat and the sound of sizzling. I stood in the doorway for a moment, watching her. What would she say? I had bared my soul to her, told her everything. I had cried, and I had kissed her and she had kissed me back. Oh fuck.

I didn't regret it. I could never regret it. I just hoped she didn't either.

"I think Charlie watches too much TV," I blurted out, announcing myself.

She jumped and turned around with a pair of tongs in her hand. "Oh, hey, good morning."

She smiled shyly and I watched as the tips of her ears turned pink. Was she embarrassed about something? I suppose it was probably a little odd to have me wake up here after what had happened last night.

"Morning."

"I'm sorry, did he wake you?"

"Not exactly."

She laughed. "He just stared at you until you had the sensation that you were being watched?"

I grinned. "Does he do that often?"

"Often enough." She turned back around to attend to what appeared to be breakfast sausages.

"How does he know what channel to watch?"

"I pre-programmed the remote. The red button is PBS, the blue one is Disney, and the Green one is Nickelodeon. He hits one of those buttons in the morning and he'll find something he likes. You think he watches too much?"

I could hear a slight irritation in her voice.

"Oh, uh, I don't know," I backtracked. "I was just amazed that he knew how to work the TV and it just sort of came out. No filter, remember?" I said trying to lighten things back up.

"Hmm," she hummed without looking at me. She was quiet for the next few minutes. I could feel the tension between us and I didn't want to go back to that. My confession was meant to free us completely, not box us in again.

I approached her carefully, stopping when I was mere inches away from her back. I placed my hands on her shoulders. She tensed up for a moment, but just as quickly, she relaxed into me. She turned her head and looked up into my eyes with a shy smile. I brushed a piece of hair that was sticking to her face away and rubbed the pad of my thumb over her bottom lip.

"Are we still okay?" I whispered.

"Yes," she breathed. "We are. But I think there are still some things we need to talk about."

I let my hands slip to the tops of her arms and began rubbing. I knew that we needed to finish talking, but I didn't want to do it now. I was afraid of what she would tell me. That it was a mistake; that she could never love me, because of who I had been and what I had done. There was still a chance that she would tell me that we could give it a shot. She had said that she would have loved me, at least I'm pretty sure that she had actually said it. Maybe she would have, if I hadn't left, if I had come back for her and told her everything then. I needed to stop thinking.

"I know we do, but can we eat breakfast first? I'm really fucking hungry."

She laughed and I think that she meant to just bump me out of the way, but her ass collided with my cock, which was still sporting a semi, and I inhaled sharply. "Jesus Christ, baby, you cannot do that."

"I'm sorry," she giggled, biting her lip.

"Sure you are." I teased.

She pulled the sausages out of the skillet and set them on a paper towel. I snagged one and tossed it back and forth between my hands.

"Ow, ow, ow, that's fucking hot."

She gave me that look and then smirked. "Wow, you really are a genius, aren't you?"

"Mmmhmm," I hummed as I shoved the sausage into my mouth, blowing air out around it to keep from burning my mouth.

"I'm going to cut these up and put them in with some scrambled eggs. Would you like some?"

"Sure. Coffee?"

She pointed the tongs in the direction of the coffee maker and I groaned in appreciation of the full pot.

I poured myself a cup and sat down at the table, finally letting my eyes roam up and down the length of her body. She was so beautiful this morning. Her hair was pulled back into a long braid and she was wearing a pair of flannel pants and a long sleeved Henley.

"Stop staring at me."

"What?"

"I can feel you staring at me. Knock it off."

She turned and started to bring the skillet towards me.

_Holy shit, she isn't wearing a bra._

"Would you be willing to grab a few plates?" she asked sweetly.

"Uh..."

"Edward?"

I shook my head and grinned. "I'm sorry, what?"

"You are ridiculous. Stop staring at my boobs."

"I wasn't..."

She arched her eyebrow.

"Okay," I said sheepishly.

I stood up and opened up a couple of cabinets before I found the plates. I pulled two ceramic plates out and then pulled a plastic one from the shelf above. I set them down on the table and watched as Bella emptied the skillet.

"When did you go get Charlie?" I asked her as she put the skillet in the sink and ran the water.

"I went over there last night, but decided not to move him, so I went back this morning at seven. He woke up about fifteen minutes later and I just brought him back here."

She returned to me and pulled out a chair, pushing down on my shoulders so that I would sit. Standing in front of me, just barely between my legs, she brought her hand to the side of my face. I winced a little as she tenderly stroked the spot where Riley's fist had connected with my cheek.

"You're going to have a bruise," she sighed.

"Yeah, I figured."

"We should have put ice on it last night."

Bella bent forward and I felt her lips gently caress the skin under my eye. My stomach fluttered at the contact and I closed my eyes for that split second that she was so close to me. When I felt her pull away I opened them again.

"It's fine, I've had worse. Besides, I liked what we did do better."

Bella blushed and smiled. She looked so fucking tempting. I needed to change the subject before I did something obscene.

"Thanks for letting me crash on your couch. Sorry about that."

"It wasn't a problem," she smiled softly. "I would have sent you to the guest room, but you looked so exhausted. I just couldn't wake you."

She pushed the plate with the most eggs and sausage towards me and handed me a fork. "Charlie, breakfast."

She went to the fridge and pulled out some ketchup and by the time she returned, Charlie was pulling out the seat to my left. Bella stood next to the table for a second and I could see her trying to figure out where to sit. I pulled out the chair to my right without looking up from my food and patted the seat.

She sat down and handed me the ketchup.

"No, thank you," I said shoving my fork into the eggs.

When she didn't move her hand, I looked up at her. Her eyes darted to Charlie who was also looking at me.

"Oh," I said, feeling like an idiot. I grabbed the ketchup. "Do you want it on top or on the side?" I asked.

"On top," he nodded.

I drizzled the ketchup all over his breakfast and set the bottle back down with a huff.

Bella put her hand on my knee causing me to inhale sharply. "You'll get it," she said quietly. "It just takes time."

I didn't say anything, too distracted by her hand. I hoped that taking care of Charlie would eventually become instinct. It was getting easier, but obviously Bella still needed to remind me. Her hand disappeared and I went back to eating.

After breakfast I stood awkwardly to the side as Bella collected the dishes and put them in the dishwasher. Charlie was still sitting at the table drinking his milk and looking at a book.

"I, uh, need to take a shower," she said turning and putting her hands on the counter top behind her. "Do you want to help Charlie get dressed?"

"I can do that."

The awkwardness was getting painful. I needed to do something, but before I could, Bella pushed herself off the counter and stood in front of me.

"I don't like this," she whispered.

"Neither do I."

"What do we do?"

I looked over at Charlie who was now watching us intently. "Right now, we do nothing," I nodded towards Charlie. "Later, we fix it."

Bella looked over at our son and then back to me. "How?"

I shook my head. "I don't know, but we'll figure it out."

"Promise?"

I flashed her my crooked smile and watched her cheeks turn pink again. I fucking loved that I could do that to her. I leaned forward. "I promise," I murmured in her ear and then kissed her neck.

I put my arm around her waist, resting my hand on the small of her back to pull her towards me and she hissed.

I let go immediately, startled. Her face was scrunched up in pain.

"What's wrong?" I asked, concerned.

"Nothing, don't worry about it," she said, shaking her head.

"Bullshit." I had lowered my voice so that only she could hear me.

"It's nothing," she assured. But I wasn't buying it. I flipped her around so that her back was to me. I wanted to make sure that Charlie didn't see anything. I held her to me and lifted the back of her shirt. The dimples just above her ass were the first thing that caught my attention. They momentarily distracted me from my goal as I imagined running my tongue between them. Bella started to struggle, but she stopped abruptly when I pulled her hips against my groin showing her what she was doing to me.

"Stay still," I warned. She let out a little whimper, but remained motionless.

I lifted her shirt a little higher and what I saw made my whole body tense up in fury and my hard-on deflate instantly. Marring her perfect, porcelain flesh right in the small of her back was a huge red welt surrounded by an angry purple bruise.

"Is that from when I knocked you into the table?" I asked.

She shrugged.

"Bella," I scolded. "Jesus Christ. Why didn't you tell me."

"It doesn't hurt," she insisted.

I frowned at her. She turned around in my arms and placed her hands on my chest.

"It's fine, I promise. I'll take some ibuprofen and I'll be good as new."

I brought her to me, wrapping my arms around her shoulders and kissing the side of her head. I wanted to take care of her, but there was nothing I could do. Just like my face, it was a bruise and it would fade.

She breathed out as I pulled away. "Charlie, show your daddy where your clothes are, okay? I'm going to take a shower. You guys can stay here and wait or head over. I'll only be about twenty minutes."

"We can wait," I said as I walked towards Charlie. He squealed and jumped up.

"No, Daddy, no," he giggled as he ran out of the kitchen and down the hallway to his bedroom.

I chased him and just before he reached his door, I swept him up into my arms and buried my face in his belly, giving him a nice wet raspberry.

Helping Charlie get dressed was like attempting to put clothes on an octopus. He kept trying to run away like it was a game. I felt a little weird trying to put underwear on him so I let him do that himself as I turned my head and tried to find the rest of his clothes. I have to say though; the kid obviously took after me in all the right areas.

When I went to help him get his pants on, he twisted and turned and kicked. It was ridiculous.

By the time I finally had him ready to go, Bella was out of the shower, dressed, and waiting for us in the living room.

"What the hell happened?" she laughed.

I shook my head in defeat, which only made her laugh harder.

XXXXXX

Tuesday was Bella's actual birthday. We hadn't really had a chance to talk yet. Bella spent Sunday afternoon doing shit with my mom, while Charlie and I helped my dad clean the garage. Sunday night, Bella was frantically trying to finish some report that she needed to have done for her meeting with her boss on Monday so I left her alone to work. Monday night, after I got home from work, we had dinner together at her apartment, but she fell asleep reading to Charlie in her bed. I kissed them both on the forehead and went back home.

Now it was Tuesday. My nerves were fucking shot. We were having a big family dinner and everyone would be here, including her father. I hadn't seen him since he had arrested me and I had no idea if he had anything else planned for me.

"Calm down, Edward," Bella tried to soothe me. "He's not going to do anything."

"Your father hates me, Bella. How am I supposed to calm down?"

"He doesn't hate you." She put her hand on my back and rubbed big circles before moving upwards and gently scratching the nape of my neck with her fingernails. It felt so fucking good. I dropped my head in encouragement for her to continue. She obliged with a light giggle. After a few minutes, I felt my body taking over. I reached back and grabbed her wrist.

"I need you to stop," I said bringing her hand to my lips and kissing her pulse point.

She looked at me confused at first, but when her mouth fell open a little, I had to smirk. She understood. She bit her lip, drawing my attention to her mouth. I swiveled my chair and pulled her towards me.

"What's the matter?" I asked, tilting my head.

"Nothing."

"I don't believe you."

"You, uh, you're making me nervous."

"I am?" I asked innocently trying to conceal my amusement. Apparently I wasn't doing it very effectively.

Her eyes snapped to mine. "You know exactly what you're doing," she glared playfully.

"So what if I do?" I pulled her a little closer and heard her inhale deeply as she came into contact with my now painfully hard erection. I was wearing dress slacks and they hid absolutely nothing.

I was just about to go ahead and try my luck at kissing her again, when I heard a throat clearing. I let my head drop and groaned. Bella jumped backwards. I had to drop my hands to my lap so that I didn't embarrass myself.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," Carlisle said, trying not to laugh. "Bella, you're father just got here."

"Oh, um, thank you, Carlisle. I'll just..." She turned to me almost apologetically. "I'll go...get him."

She disappeared around the corner.

"Great timing, Pops," I grumbled as I stood up. Nothing kills your hard on faster than your dad catching you trying to make a move on a pretty girl.

He laughed. "Sorry, son. I didn't realize that you two were...well, I just didn't expect to find you...so close."

I turned to face him. "I suppose I should probably tell you. You're bound to find out eventually."

Carlisle looked at me questioningly.

"I've been in love with Bella Swan since I was twelve years old, Dad."

He opened his mouth and then closed it a few times, his brow furrowed. "Excuse me, what?"

"It's a long story," I shrugged. "One that may not entirely be appropriate to discuss with my father."

"You, uh, you're in love with her?" he swallowed.

I nodded.

"And she knows this?"

I shook my head. "No. She knows that I was. I haven't told her that I still am."

Carlisle pinched the bridge of his nose. "I guess I'm a little confused. You were so angry with her."

"Yes, I was. I had every right to be angry with her. Don't tell me that you weren't upset when you found out about Charlie."

"Of course I was. We all were."

"And you love her; you've forgiven her."

Carlisle sighed and sat down next to me. "I know it seemed like we were always on her side, son and I apologize for that. It wasn't fair for us to treat you like we did. At the time, we were all still trying to get used to the situation. When we came back, Bella was so skittish and defensive. Attacking her would have only done more harm than good."

"So you attacked me instead?" I wasn't upset, it was merely a question. I honestly understood why they were upset with me. What I never understood was why they weren't equally as upset with Bella.

"It was wrong. I can't sit here and defend myself or your mother or any of the others. But don't think that because we didn't go after her, that we didn't hold her responsible. There were so many emotions playing out. We didn't handle them like we should have."

"Neither did I," I admitted. "But regardless of how angry I was, I've forgiven her. We've forgiven each other and I can't hide anymore; I don't want to hide anymore. I want to show her. I want us to be a family."

"So show her then," Carlisle smiled.

"I don't know how. I don't know how she feels. Things got a little intense the other night, but I don't understand what it all means. She wants to talk to me, but I'm scared of what she has to say. What if she tells me there's no chance for us."

"From what I walked in on just a few minutes ago, I don't think that's what she's going to tell you," he smirked. "But if she does, then you move forward. You be the best parents you can for Charlie."

He was right. I couldn't control how Bella felt. We were going to have to move on regardless.

Carlisle stood up and put his hand out. "Come on, we've got a chief of police to welcome."

I could almost feel the blood drain from my face and Carlisle laughed. I let him pull me out of the chair. He put his arm around my back, resting his hand on my shoulder, leading me into the foyer without another word.

Bella wasn't there. Her father was talking with my mom. They were laughing as I approached them, but were suddenly quiet at my arrival. My mom stepped backwards, taking my place next to Carlisle.

I took a deep breath and threw my hand out. "Chief Swan."

He looked at me, then down at my hand, then back at me again. Slowly, very slowly, he put his hand out to meet mine. "Edward," he said, smirking at me from behind his mustache.

His handshake was firm, but not threatening. Bella stepped up next to me holding Charlie. She leaned towards me and Charlie reached out. I lifted him into my arms and secured him as Bella went towards her father.

"Hi, Daddy," she whispered hugging him tightly.

"Hi, baby girl. Happy Birthday."

Charlie's head lifted and he looked at me, his eyes wide.

"Daddy?"

"What, buddy?"

"She called Grampa, daddy."

"Yes, that's because Grampa is her daddy."

"Like you're my daddy?"

"Just like that," I confirmed.

He looked thoughtful for a moment and then put his head back down on my shoulder. Chief Swan was staring at me with an odd expression on his face.

"How's my boy?" he asked shifting his attention to Charlie. He reached out and I handed my son off to him.

Bella turned around and I felt her fingertips brush against my forearm as she moved past me. I followed her...closely, into the other room. She giggled and tripped as my knees hit the back of her thighs. I reached out and grabbed her hip.

"Sorry," I breathed into her ear making her shiver.

"Sure you are," she teased, repeating my words from the other morning. "I'm glad to see that you've...calmed down."

"Mmmhmm," I hummed, lifting her shirt slightly and tickling my fingers against her skin before releasing her. She folded into herself and darted away.

Dinner was surprisingly pleasant. When I went to take my seat, Bella stood next to me, catching me a little off guard. I expected that she'd want to sit next to her father, but instead she was choosing the seat next to mine. I pulled it out for her and she winked at me. Mom had set Charlie's booster seat on the other side of me so I helped him get seated and buckled in. Bella leaned in to me and pressed her mouth to my shoulder.

"Thank you," she whispered.

I kissed her head and looked over at her dad, who was watching us with what appeared to be part amusement, part wonder. I nodded at him and he returned the sentiment.

Later on, once we had our food, Chief Swan actually initiated a conversation about my work at the clinic and we talked about both football and baseball along with Emmett and Carlisle.

"So what's going on with your work, Bella?" Carlisle asked about halfway through dinner.

"My hours are increasing to thirty per week starting in about two weeks," Bella answered.

"Have you decided what you're going to do with Charlie?" Mom wondered.

"No, not really," she sighed.

"I thought you were going to put him with Mrs. Crowley," Chief Swan asked as he chewed on a piece of bread."

I could hear a rumble coming from Bella, almost like she were growling, and I couldn't help but snicker. She glanced over and scowled.

"We're still talking about it," she answered.

"Well, what options are you considering?" Alice asked.

"Bella's looking at daycare and I want to hire a nanny."

Chief Swan choked and had to take a drink of water.

"That's my response too, Dad. A nanny is completely unnecessary."

"Bella, a nanny can provide him the one on one attention that he needs," I reasoned.

"I don't want to have this conversation right now," she huffed.

"You never want to have this conversation, but we need to make a decision."

"I never want to have this conversation, because it always ends in an argument and we never get anywhere."

"Why don't you guys just put him in pre-school?" Rose suggested. "I mean, he's three and he's potty trained. I think he'd do well in a classroom."

I gaped at Rose for a solid two minutes. Apparently, Bella was doing the same thing, because she was silent as well. Rose continued to focus on her salad as if she hadn't just completely solved our problem.

"Rose," Bella finally breathed. "I think I could kiss you right about now."

"We've already had this discussion, Bella; you don't swing that way," Rose laughed.

_Wait, they've had a discussion about what?_

Bella looked at me and slapped my arm with the back of her hand. "Why didn't you think about that?"

I was about to defend myself until I saw her lips twitching and realized she was teasing.

"That is a wonderful idea," my mom clapped her hands. "Oh, he's so smart already, but being in school would just be perfect."

"Would you like to go to school, Charlie?" Bella asked.

Charlie opened his mouth to say something, but closed it when a piece of half chewed bread fell out. He looked down into his lap and then back up at Bella and nodded. Everyone laughed and Bella handed him a napkin.

XXXXXXX

"Present time!" Alice cheered as Jasper and Carlisle started clearing the dishes.

I pulled Charlie into my lap so that he could see his mama better. Bella rolled her eyes, but smiled appreciatively as Alice handed her a small box.

"That's from me and Rose," Alice chirped excitedly.

Inside were an assortment of silk and cotton scarves and a gift certificate for a day at the spa.

Bella pulled out each one and examined them. "They're beautiful guys, thank you so much."

Next was an envelope from my parents. Bella opened it and gasped. "Oh, Esme, Carlisle, this is absolutely fantastic, and completely unnecessary."

"What is it?" I asked, because they hadn't clued me in at all.

Bella handed me the envelope. It was two tickets to Denver and a four day stay at Vail Cascade Condominiums. I looked up at my mom suspiciously and she winked at me.

"I don't know how to ski though," Bella said quietly.

"You can try it out. Or you can just relax in the condo. Carlisle and I spent a week there for our fifteenth wedding anniversary last year and I only skied two days. The rest of the time I wandered around Vail Village or spent time at the spa. It was absolutely fantastic. They're open tickets so you can use them whenever you want. You just have to call to verify availability."

"Thank you, you guys, I don't know what to say." Bella stood up and hugged my mom and then kissed Carlisle on the cheek.

Chief Swan gave her a white gold wrist watch that she had wanted and Emmett gave her a homemade certificate for five days or nights of free babysitting and a hundred dollar Barnes and Noble gift card.

Jasper handed her a card and quietly watched as Bella opened it. Her face went from amusement to confusion pretty quickly. She looked up at him and pursed her lips as though she were about to ask a question, but then she looked back down at the card again.

"My co-worker's wife is a professional photographer," he explained. "I've arranged for you to have some portraits done."

"Oh my, Jasper. This is...wow, thank you."

Jasper only nodded at her with a shy smile.

Apparently it was our turn. I pulled the small box that had been burning a hole in my pocket out and handed it to Charlie.

"Here you go, Mommy," Charlie grinned, thrusting it at her. "It's from Daddy and me."

Bella took the box and glanced up at me as she bit her lip. She pulled off the paper and opened the lid. Inside, was another box. She looked at me again.

"I know what it is, Mama, It's a..."

I clamped my hand over Charlie's mouth. "Don't tell her, buddy, it's supposed to be a surprise," I whispered in his ear.

"Oh," Charlie frowned.

Bella pulled out the second box and carefully opened the lid. Inside was a platinum mother and child necklace with a tiny little diamond at the top and a blue diamond in the center representing Charlie's birthstone.

I watched as her eyes filled with tears.

"Do you like it?" Charlie asked.

Bella motioned for him and he scampered out of my lap and into her arms. She hugged him tightly. "I love it," she whispered, as she stared directly into my eyes. "Thank you so much, baby."

She looked so happy at that moment, holding our little boy in her arms and rocking him back and forth. I knew it had been a rough few days for her. It's not that I was upset about Riley not being in her life, in our lives, but I knew that his abrupt departure made her incredibly sad. She didn't talk about it, but I could see it in her eyes.

That night, just as she and Charlie were heading back to their apartment, I took the necklace out of its box.

"Turn around," I said as I unhooked the clasp.

Bella did as I asked and lifted up her hair so that I could secure the necklace around her neck. When I was done, I kissed her just behind her ear. "It's beautiful, just like you," I whispered.

She turned her head slightly and captured my lips in the sweetest of kisses. "Thank you."

We broke apart just as Charlie came bounding into the foyer.

"Ready to go?" Bella asked him.

He nodded and jumped into my arms. "Nigh night, Daddy."

"Goodnight, buddy, I love you."

"I love you too."

BPOV

"Here," Edward said dropping the stack of papers and pamphlets onto my table.

It was Friday night. Edward had worked late to help out with a vaccine clinic and Charlie was already in bed.

We still hadn't talked. Edward was avoiding it. Every time I tried, he would either change the subject or mysteriously have something that needed to be taken care of immediately. One way or another, I was telling him how I felt tonight. I was done waiting.

"What is that?" I asked, staring at the pile in front of me.

"My mother got one for every pre-school from here to Port Angeles."

"Port Angeles?"

"Yes, well, since I'm working there and you'll be there more often, it wouldn't be completely unreasonable. We could just drive together the days we both have to be there, drop Charlie off, and then come home at the end of the day."

I pursed my lips. "Yeah, I guess that makes sense."

I started flipping through the papers. "Jesus, there's so many of them. How the hell do you know which one to pick?"

Edward shrugged and sat down next to me. "I have no fucking clue."

"We can't possibly visit all of these places."

Edward rested his head on the back of the sofa.

"I suppose we pick out the ten that sound the best on paper and then put them in order of best to worst. We can visit the top three and pick one."

"What if we don't like any of those?"

"We move down the list until we find one we like?"

"Is that a question or a suggestion?"

"Well, fuck me, Bella. I know less about this shit than you do."

My breath caught a little at his statement. I know he wasn't actually offering, but hearing the words "fuck me, Bella" come out of his mouth caused my heart to race and my body to heat up a little.

He must have heard my falter, because he lifted his head and looked at me. "What?"

I lowered my eyes to my lap and shook my head. "Nothing."

"No, what?"

"What did you say to Riley?"

Edward's whole body went rigid. I would have high-fived myself for successfully diverting what could have been a really embarrassing conversation, but I wasn't quite sure that I had diverted it in the right direction.

"When?"

"Just before he hit you?"

Edward growled and I thought for sure he wouldn't answer me.

"I'll tell you what, you tell me something and then I'll tell you what I said."

_I'm not sure I like the sound of that._

"O...Okay."

Edward smirked as if he had just won. Won what? I wasn't quite sure yet.

"Did you really hate me in high school?"

_Well, shit._

I nodded. Why? Because I _had_ hated Edward in high school. I hated him for ignoring me and for sleeping with and doing other things with all those skanks. I didn't know at the time that it wasn't exactly what it looked like.

Edward's smirk disappeared as if I hadn't answered the way that he thought I would. I rolled my neck a little and let my nod turn into a shake. I hated him because I had fallen so hard for him that everything he had done broke my heart.

His eyes narrowed and he leaned in to me, putting his hand on the side of my face and stopping my head movement.

"You confuse me so much, Bella," he whispered. "Please, just tell me."

"How could you not see?" I asked, leaning into his hand, willing him to understand.

"See what?"

"Do you know what it did to me every time you brought a new girl around?" I reached up and covered his hand with my own, bringing it to my mouth and kissing his fingertips.

Edward swallowed harshly. "No."

"I don't have a story like yours. I didn't know much about sex until I was sixteen. I knew the basics, how it worked, but no one paid me any attention until Danny Grey kissed me under the mistletoe at your parents Christmas party sophomore year. That was the first time any tongue had been in my mouth other than my own."

I could feel my cheeks warming in embarrassment at the memory of me nearly biting the poor boy's tongue off in surprise as he thrust it down my throat.

"It wasn't until Alice and Jasper finally..."

"Eh, eh, eh," Edward cried in horror. "I...I don't want to hear anything about that."

I snickered softly. "In any case, I was seventeen before I knew the details. I mean, I had heard you joke and boast about what you did and what the girls did, but I tended to tune you out when you went there. I never did anything like that with Danny, or Ian Cope, or Mike Newton."

"You didn't? I mean, I know now that you were a virgin, but you didn't...do anything more intimate?"

I shook my head. "I did over the clothes stuff; grinding and groping, but you were the first guy I had ever seen naked."

"Fuck," Edward groaned.

"Don't," I scolded. "Don't do that. I wanted you, Edward. I wouldn't have let it happen if I didn't. Yes, you scared me at first, but when you..." I had to stop. I couldn't talk about it. "You made me feel so good."

Edward scowled at me.

"Before that," I sighed. "I had never had a guy go down on me before."

"Yeah," he smiled fondly. "I really enjoyed that."

His tongue darted out to wet his lower lip and I felt my whole body flush with desire as I remembered his words. '_I've often wondered what you tasted like, Bella. Fucking amazing, just as I expected.'_

"We really screwed up," I groaned.

He nodded. "We did."

"But, if we hadn't..."

"We wouldn't have had Charlie, I know."

"How do we regret something like that?"

"We don't," he smiled sadly. "We make up for lost time."

"So much lost time," I whispered.

We stayed quiet for a few minutes. Edward's hand slid down my arm and rested next to his thigh.

"Can I kiss you?" I asked him, biting my lip nervously.

His face registered surprise, but he nodded. I started to lean in. He stopped me just before I reached him, gently pulled my lip from my teeth and then closed the distance. It started out tenderly, both of us exploring the sensation, our noses brushing against each other. He was letting me control it. His hands remained clenched at his side and I could tell he was holding himself back. I felt the tip of his tongue dart out several times before disappearing back into his own mouth. The next time he did it, I was ready for him. He jerked a little when I stroked his tongue with my own, but he fell into the rhythm pretty quickly.

Finally, as the heat between us intensified, his willpower snapped and his hands shot out, one wrapping around my ribcage and the other the base of my skull, drawing me closer. His mouth pushed firmly against mine and his tongue became more aggressive in its pursuit.

I whimpered. He tried to slow down when he heard the sound, but I wouldn't let him. I scrambled to my knees and climbed into his lap, straddling his thighs. He moaned and instinctively thrust his hips upwards. He was as hard as a fucking rock, his scrubs and my thin pajama pants making it very easy for me to feel every glorious inch.

I put my elbows on his shoulders, caging his head between my arms, and grasped his hair in my hands. I pulled backwards so that our lips and tongues pulled apart, but I wasn't done. I kissed his jaw and then licked his neck from his Adam's apple up to his chin, inhaling his intoxicating scent as I went.

"Oh, Bella," he panted, thrusting upwards again, this time intentionally.

I raised myself up on my knees, looking down at him and breathing heavily. Our gazes remained locked as his hands moved so that they were resting on my ass. I bent down slowly, meeting his mouth again in a searing kiss.

"I've waited so long for you," I breathed against his lips. "It's always been you, only you."

I felt his hands move so that he was cradling my back and before I could register what was happening, he had flipped me so that my back was against the sofa. He was on top of me, his mouth still on mine. He shifted slightly and I spread my legs so that he could rest against me comfortably. At first he kept his knees bent so that we weren't actually touching below the waist, but I quickly remedied that. I wrapped my legs around his ass and pushed down as hard as I could. I wanted, no I _needed_ to feel him against me. He pulled his mouth away gauging whether I was okay with what was happening. I grinned at him and ran my feet down the back of his legs. His body sank down onto mine and I let out a puff of air in reaction to his weight.

I was scared out of my fucking mind to have him like this, but it felt so right. He was what I wanted, what I needed.

He rocked against me, both of us gasping at the friction he was creating. His mouth went to my neck and I moaned as his tongue traced upwards and flicked at my earlobe.

"You taste so good," Edward moaned.

He thrust his erection against me and it hit my clit in such a manner that I let out a squeak. My already overheated body burst into flames. I felt the overwhelming urge to touch him. I slid my hand down between us and grasped his cloth covered cock. I wanted to stroke him, to bring him to release. I wanted to be the one to make him feel good. I reached for the waistband of his scrubs, but his hand shot out and stopped me.

"Bella," he breathed.

"Huh?"

"Bella, we gotta stop."

"No," I whined. "If feels too fucking good to stop."

"Baby, not like this, please, not like this."

"Like what?" I asked rolling my hips against his again.

"Ugg," he grunted. "Like this, on the couch, with our son just down the hallway. Please," he begged.

I opened my eyes and saw his pained expression staring back at me. He was pleading with me to stop, because he knew that if it went much further, he'd be unable to pull away. He would take me on that couch, and I would let him, because I loved him and I had waited ten fucking years for him.

"Okay," I conceded.

His head dipped and he rested his forehead against my navel, breathing heavily.

"What are we doing, Bella?" Edward asked hesitantly.

"I don't know," I said running my hand through his thick hair. "What do you want?"

Edward lifted his head. "I want you. I thought that was obvious." He pushed up my shirt a little and kissed my navel. "I want us."

I tapped him on the head and crooked my finger. He crawled up my body so that he was hovering directly over me.

"I want us too," I murmured. Edward's lips crashed down on mine passionately. My body started to react again, but as I was trying to bring him closer, he started to back away. His lips lingered on mine, making all sorts of silent promises, promises of something more. Eventually, their touch was no more than a whisper and then they were gone. He settled himself between me and back of the sofa and wrapped his arms around my waist before burying his face in my hair. I could feel that he was still turned on, but neither one of us did anything about it.

"I answered your question," I said after a few minutes of comfortable silence.

I felt his chest vibrate as he chuckled. "I should know better than to try and distract you."

"Yes, you should. Not that I didn't enjoy it. Feel free to distract me whenever you like, just don't expect me to completely forget."

I felt Edward's breath on my ear. "I bet I can make you forget," he said huskily.

"Mmm, yes, maybe you can, but you won't," I challenged. "At least not tonight. So what exactly did you say to him?"

"Hmmmm," Edward hummed. "I said..."

XXXXXXX

**AN: Ah ha ha! I haven't left you with a cliffy for a while. I know, it's not a real cliffy, but it's as close as I could get at this point in time. **

**So what did you think? I would love your opinions. A teaser will be provided to graciously thank all those who review. **

**Okay, so Sparkling Citrus has made me Canon Author for the month of December, thank you ladies! There have been two interviews. The first was a character interview with Riley and was posted yesterday. The second was with me and will be posted next week. Check out ****http : / www(dot) sparklingcitrus(dot)com for both interviews. The link is on my profile page.**

**Oh, and don't forget to follow me on twitter. twitter(dot)com/littlecat358 I don't automatically follow everyone so if you want to "chat" with me on twitter, you have to let me know. Just PM me. :oD**

**Forgot this. Am putting it in after original posting: Next week: Little Charlie wonders what exactly his parents are doing. **

**Recommendation: **

**On Grey Mornings by littlesecret84: Bella's tryst with power made her infamous. Hounded and ashamed, she's back in Forks to start over again, but where do you find a clean slate when everyone who sees you already knows your biggest secret? AH, adult stuff.**

**I am really enjoying this. The writing style of this story is amazing and I love Bella's no bullshit attitude; it makes me laugh. **


	20. Fluff and Foreboding

**AN: Hello all. Awesome. Truly awesome. I hit 3000 reviews this week and am very very excited. Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing. Sometimes the reviews get messed up so if you review and don't get a teaser, just PM me and let me know. Thank you. **

**As I stated on the Twilighted thread, this is a bit of a fluff chapter. Relationship building and such. Please be forewarned that there is some citrus in this chapter. This story is rated M for a reason, please abide by the guidelines.**

**The usual thanks to my peeps. Mel for pre-reading for me at all sorts of crazy times. Woman, I don't know when you actually sleep. LOL. Beegurl13 for WCing with me to help motivate me to finish. ****Everyone on the thread and on twitter who give me daily support, especially when I'm having a complete block! And, of course, **Mollie, who, once again, deserves much more than beta thanx here since she practically wrote half the chapter. :-) Much love, honey! 

** All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer. **

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 18: Foreboding

"I said..."

She lifted her eyebrows, waiting for his answer.

"Edward?"

I swallowed. "Um."

"Is it bad?"

I looked up at her and shook my head. "No."

I didn't know why I was so nervous to tell her. I had already told her everything, exposed myself to the core. She wanted us; wanted me.

"Okay, well?"

"I told him that you _had_ always and _will_ always be mine."

Okay, so I was paraphrasing a little. I actually told him that I was taking back what was mine and that he and his pencil dick couldn't compete; that she belonged to me and only me."

Should I have told Bella that word for word? Probably. And I would, but this was all so new to us and I didn't want to scare her off.

"You're not telling me everything are you?"

_Damn_

"That's essentially what I said," I admitted sheepishly.

She wrinkled her nose. "I'm going to accept that... for now, but I fully intend to get the whole thing out of you someday soon."

"And I will be happy to tell you...someday soon."

"You do realize that our biggest problem is lack of communication, right?"

"We're communicating. I just think that you may appreciate what I said verbatim a little bit more if I wait."

"Wait for what?"

"Wait until I'm sure that you won't run away screaming."

"I'm not going anywhere, Edward," she whispered.

"Good," I whispered back. "I kind of like where you are right now."

I kissed the back of her head and she snuggled into my arms. At some point, we both must have fallen asleep, because when I opened my eyes again, the room was just being coated with a hazy sunlight, meaning it was probably somewhere around seven in the morning.

We must not have moved much during the night either. One of my arms was almost completely numb from being underneath Bella's neck. Her tiny little body was still curled into mine, but she had shifted slightly further onto her back so I could see her face.

She turned her head and smacked her lips, but didn't appear to wake up. I watched her sleep for a good twenty minutes, ignoring my aching muscles. All of them. One muscle in particular was really pushing for some attention. I was trying very hard not to allow it to molest her leg, but I wasn't as successful as I had hoped to be. When she started to stir, I decided to try and distract her.

I pushed her hair away from her face and neck and gently pressed my lips against her skin. She made these little waking up noises, but kept her eyes closed. I removed my lips, finding another delectable little spot before repeating the action. I saw her mouth twitch a little and knew that she was not as asleep as she was pretending to be.

I placed gentle kisses down her neck onto her shoulder and then started back up towards her ear.

"What are you doing?" she asked in a husky voice.

"Nothing."

She laughed. "That doesn't feel like nothing. Oh," she gasped as I gently tugged on her earlobe with my teeth.

I smiled against her skin. My arm was around her waist and I let my hand wander underneath her t-shirt, tracing over her rib cage. I kept moving upwards slowly, waiting for the moment she stopped my progression. About the time I reached the underside of her breast, I realized that she wasn't going to. She was wearing a thin satin bra and I traced the underwire with my index finger. We were absolutely silent except for our breathing, which was steadily increasing in both pace and intensity. I could feel her heart thumping against my chest and I'm pretty sure she could feel mine. I started tracing around her breast in circles, enjoying the silkiness of satin against the pad of my finger. When I switched direction, the fabric on the swell of her breast gave a slight resistance where it met skin. My circles got smaller, until I was just tracing around her nipple. The simplest of touches made me feel overheated, like I was about to burst out of my skin. I wanted to lift her shirt and suck on her; roll my tongue around that pert little bud and...Fuck, I needed to stop before I exploded.

I felt her shift towards my hand and knew what she was trying to do. She wanted me to touch her. I wanted to tease her, but I didn't dare laugh at her for fear that she would make me stop. I pulled my hand away and heard her huff slightly in frustration. Before she had a chance to do anything else, I cupped her breast and brushed my thumb over her satin covered nipple.

She gasped, thrusting her chest forward and her hips back towards me, feeling what I had to offer.

_Oh God, resist, resist, resist._

I tried to shift myself away from her, but I didn't have much room.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

I didn't really want to stop what I was doing, but I needed to get myself into a less problematic position.

I rolled us so that she was underneath me and scooted myself down her body. I lifted her shirt so that I had about six inches of skin showing, three above her bellybutton and three below. I started placing light kisses in random spots, but stopped when I felt a slight ridging. I pulled back and looked down. There were several very light scars around the insides of her hips and lower abdomen. I began tenderly tracing them with my finger. They were very light. I probably wouldn't have seen them, but for the fact that I was so close to her.

"They're stretch marks," Bella said pushing my hand away.

"I know what they are," I responded returning to my tracing.

"Stop doing that."

"Why?" I asked, confused. Did she really want me to stop? Was I making her uncomfortable? I looked up at her. She didn't look distressed in any way, but her cheeks were tinged pink. Was she embarrassed?

"Because they make me self-conscious."

She wriggled and tried to swat me away again, but I grabbed both of her wrists. Since my hands were both occupied, I bent down and resumed the light kissing, focusing solely on the scars.

"They shouldn't," I mumbled against her skin. "I'm guessing these are from your pregnancy?"

"Yes," she grunted quietly. "I told you I gained a lot of weight."

"You grew a baby. My baby. I think they're kind of sexy."

She was twitching below me, but I continued to restrain her from pushing me away again. Instead, I glanced up at her face. I waited until I caught her attention and when I did, I grinned wickedly.

"What are you going to do?" she asked nervously.

"What gives you the impression that I'm going to do something?" I chuckled.

"You've got that mischievous look on your face. The one that you've apparently passed on to your son. I'd know that look anywhere."

I kept my eyes locked on hers as I bent my head again. I flattened out my tongue and dragged it across her bellybutton. Then I began using it to trace the marks; the marks that were the symbol that she had carried my child inside of her. A rush of sadness hit me, reminding me that I hadn't been there during that time; that I had missed out on watching my child grow, but I pushed it aside. I didn't want to think about that right now.

As my tongue travelled further south, Bella's hips rolled and she moaned. I hit the waistband of her pajama pants and realized that I was on a precipice. It would be so easy to slide her pants from her hips and slip my tongue inside of her waiting heat. But what would that mean? Were we moving too fast? Would she regret it?

My mind and my body were in a complete tug of war. My dick was shouting at me to just dive in, make her cry out. He wanted to hear my name coming from her lips in complete ecstasy. But as my brain was telling me to slow down, my dick argued that this, in no way, went against the plan. This was just giving her a little preview of how good I could make her feel. How good I wanted to make her feel. He had a point.

Fortunately, I didn't have to make that decision. Bella made it for me.

"Edward, we can't. Charlie's going to wake up soon."

_Oh, yeah._

I sighed, resigning myself to the fact that it was time to pull back. I gave her navel one last kiss before climbing back up her body and hovering above her. God, she was so fucking beautiful. I was just about to show her mouth what I wanted to do to her pussy when the shuffling of little feet caused both Bella and I to jump to opposite ends of the sofa. Her eyes were wide as Charlie just looked from me to her and then back to me again. He climbed up next to Bella and laid his head in her lap, yawning and stretching out his legs.

Bella bit her lip and I could see her shoulders shaking slightly in laughter. I wasn't sure whether to laugh myself or cry at that point. It's not like we were doing anything that would harm him; Bella had made sure of that, thank God. It was good for kids to see their parents being affectionate, wasn't it? Okay, maybe not quite that affectionate, but he was three, it could easily be explained as a hug or a wrestle. I got up and went over to the where they were sitting. I brushed Charlie's hair from his eyes and he looked up at me and smiled sleepily. I didn't know how Bella would receive my next move, but I needed to do it. I bent down, taking her lips between mine in the most tender kiss I could, given that five minutes before I had wanted to completely maul certain parts of her anatomy. She kissed me back, smiling. We really were beginning to feel like a family. I couldn't help but hope that someday soon, I wouldn't have to leave to go home, because this would be my home, with Charlie and Bella.

"I'm going to go make some coffee," I sighed.

She nodded and I left the room.

When I got to the kitchen, I banged my head against the cabinet above the coffee pot. Bella was going to be the death of me, I was absolutely sure of it. There was no way that I was going to be able to resist her for very long. But I needed to do it right.

I started making the coffee and sat there staring at it as it percolated. Warm arms slipping around my waist brought me out of my thoughts and back into reality.

"That could have been disastrous," I groaned.

"It could have been, but it wasn't. Don't worry about it. We just need to be careful."

"Did he ever say anything about..." I didn't need to finish my sentence.

"No, actually, he never did. My guess is that he didn't see anything."

"That's good," I sighed, relieved.

She let go of me and went to the fridge. I turned around only to see that her brow was furrowed.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

"I'm trying to figure out if what we were doing was any different from what you were doing, back then."

_Is she kidding?_

"You're really questioning that?"

"Yes. I mean, if I hadn't stopped you..."

"Well, that's the first difference. You did stop me. You thought about him and what would happen if he woke up."

She nodded.

"Plus, we're his parents, Bella. You're not some random girl and I'm not some random guy. Someday, he's probably going to catch us in a compromising position. I'd almost rather it be now when he doesn't really understand, wouldn't you?"

I didn't care that I was implying that we would be in some precarious positions in the future. The near future, I hoped. After last night and this morning, I had no doubt in my mind that we were headed in that direction.

She giggled. "He's paying very close attention, you know?"

"To us?"

"Yes. I can see him trying to work it all out."

"But he hasn't said anything about it?" I asked.

Charlie was a smart kid. I didn't doubt that he had some questions about the situation, especially since I had been caught sleeping on their sofa, not once, but twice. Well, I guess I hadn't really been caught sleeping earlier, but I digress. How do you really explain to a toddler about relationships?

"No, not really, but it's only a matter of time. I just wish I knew what to expect."

"Yeah, me too."

Bella grabbed the milk from the fridge and filled up a sippy cup. "I'm going to make some peanut butter toast, would you like some?"

"Go give Charlie his milk, I'll make the toast," I said, grabbing the jar of Peter Pan and loaf of bread from the pantry."

As Bella left the room, I had a spark of genius. I don't know what made me think of it, but I knew that I wanted to show her how much she meant to me. I wanted to show her how much I wanted us. She already knew how much I wanted her, I was perpetually hard anytime she was within...well anytime I even thought about her, really. Not easy to hide when you are wearing scrubs all the time.

I shoved a couple pieces of bread in the toaster and thought about where I would take her.

I'm not sure what she saw on my face when she returned, but I think it made her anxious, because she suddenly looked very tense.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing. Come here."

She approached me tentatively and I brushed the back of my fingers against her cheekbone.

"Bella, would you be willing to go out on date with me?"

Bella's face instantly relaxed into a smile.

"A date? Like dinner and a movie?"

"Yeah, something like that," I nodded.

"I'd like that very much."

I let a heavy breath and she giggled.

"Did you expect me to say no?"

"No, not really. But sometimes I don't know what to expect out of you."

She pressed herself against me, wrapped her arms around my neck and brought me down to her in a firm, but gentle kiss.

"That, for instance," I said against her lips.

"Would you like for me to be more predictable?"

"Absolutely not! If it gets me more of that, you can be as unpredictable as you want."

She laughed and pushed me away, but I wasn't about to let her get away just yet. I reached for her and pulled her back into my arms, resting my chin against her head.

"How bout Thursday?"

"I like Thursdays."

"Me too. We can spend the morning with Charlie at the park, that way when we go out, we won't feel so guilty."

She lifted her head and looked at me with her cheek still pressed against my chest. "You feel guilty?"

"Sometimes. I feel like I don't get to see him very often. Especially when I work late."

"I'm sorry," she said rubbing her cheek up and down against me.

I could feel her fingers toying with the hem of my shirt and then my belt loops.

"Do you still want to take him for the night?"

I couldn't help the grin that I felt spread across my face. "Really?"

"Yes, really."

"You think he'd be alright to do that?"

"I think he'd be fine to do that. In fact, I think he'd be thrilled to do that."

At that moment, the toast popped up. I let Bella go with a kiss to her forehead and finished making breakfast. We sat in the living room watching some show called _Handy Manny_ for a little bit before I left to go back to the house.

When I entered the main house I was greeted by Mom, Carlisle, Alice and Jasper. They all looked up at me in surprise.

"Edward!" Mom squeaked. "We thought you were still asleep."

"No, I woke up about an hour and a half ago."

"Oh."

"I fell asleep on Bella's sofa again," I grinned.

They didn't need to know that I fell asleep wrapped around Bella on the sofa. That would be our little secret. They all knew that Bella and I had reached a turning point in our relationship; we didn't hide our affection for each other. They already knew too much about our sexual history than I ever would have wanted though, so I figured that whatever happened from this point on, really wasn't any of their business.

"I'm going to go take a shower and get changed," I announced.

After a quick cleanse and a really intense Bella-induced, self inflicted orgasm, I dressed and returned to kitchen. I half expected it to be empty, but everyone was still sitting around talking.

"Oh good, Alice, can you babysit Charlie on Thursday night?"

"Um, maybe. Jazz and I are heading to visit his parents in Tacoma this afternoon. Our plan is to be back by Wednesday night; right, babe?"

Jasper looked up from something my mom was showing him to acknowledge his girlfriend. "Yes, I think so, darlin. I love my Mama, but there is only so much a man can take of the heavy southern cooking and 'when are you gonna make me a grandma' talk."

I laughed and lowered my head. Jasper's parents were hard core southern proper, even though they'd been in Washington for a good ten years. His mama was a riot and made the best biscuits and gravy and homemade mac and cheese ever. They were not too happy with Alice and Jasper "co-habitatin" at first, but they got used to it pretty quickly. For years Mama Whitlock had been asking Jasper when he was gonna make a proper woman out of Alice. Now she had apparently given up on the whole wedding and was ready for the baby makin.

"Lord, you'd think I was forty or somethin," he said grinning at my parents

"Watch it now," Mom warned in a teasing manner.

Jasper loved teasing my parents about their age, probably because they were a good fifteen years younger than his parents.

"Oh, and now that she's heard that you have a grand-baby, I wouldn't be surprised if she starts slipping fertility treatments into Alice's tea at night."

Everybody laughed, except for Alice. Jasper noticed immediately.

"I'm just kiddin, Allie. You know the worst Mama would do would be replace your birth control pills with sugar tablets."

Alice frowned. "That's not funny, Jasper Tobias Whitlock."

I snickered as Alice used his full name.

"If I catch your Mama anywhere near my birth control pills, you are sleeping on the couch for a month."

"Well, the couch seems to work for Edward, but I'll make sure to keep her out of your toiletries anyhow, sugar. Okay?"

"Oh, I don't plan to sleep on the couch forever," I said before I could catch myself.

All four heads turned to face me. My mother and Alice had their mouths gaping open and their eyes wide. Jasper was shaking his head in amusement and Carlisle looked almost smug.

"Shit, that didn't come out right," I mumbled.

I cleared my throat awkwardly. "So, Alice, you think that you can babysit then?"

"Uh, yeah, Edward, I probably can. Why? What are you up to?" she asked with her hand against her mouth, trying to smother a giggle.

"I'm taking Bella out on a date."

"You are?" Mom asked, her voice rising an entire octave.

"Yeah. We've kind of done things a little backward so I thought maybe it was time to correct that," I shrugged.

"That's a wonderful gesture, son," Carlisle nodded. "I think that she deserves to be wined and dined a little."

"Yeah, not this time, Dad, I have something else up my sleeve."

"Where are you going to take her then?" Alice asked, confused.

"Nuh uh. I'm keeping this piece of information to myself. You are welcome to ask your best friend after I bring her home from said date."

My mom grinned at me. "Wherever you take her, I'm sure she will be thrilled."

_God, I hope so._

I grabbed myself a glass of water and sat down with my family.

"So, I have Charlie for the night. Any suggestions on what to do?" I asked casually, trying, and failing, to conceal my excitement.

"You are just full of surprises today, aren't you," Mom laughed.

I shrugged. "Well, Bella and I talked about it last week and then she asked me this morning if I was up for it, which I am."

"Well, your father and I are going to dinner at Rose and Emmett's tonight. Depending on how late it is, we may just spend the night. But I think that playing trucks with him, maybe doing some coloring, building a fort; those kinds of things would keep you guys busy for a few hours."

"Thanks, Ma."

She set her hand on top of mine and squeezed.

We sat, chatting, for probably another hour before Alice and Jasper had to get up and finish packing.

Bella texted me to tell me she was taking Charlie to visit her dad until just after lunch so I decided to help Carlisle with some of the yard work. It was kind of fun.

That afternoon, Bella and I lounged lazily on her living room floor playing cards while Charlie took a nap. It was easy and comfortable.

At three-thirty, I helped Charlie pack up everything that he would need for the night.

"You sure you're going to be okay without us?" I teased Bella as we were heading out the door.

"I don't know. What could I possibly do with all this free time?" she laughed. "I think I'll take some time to do some leisure reading, maybe take a bath and have a glass of wine. Put on my pajamas, turn on the fireplace and watch a movie."

The thought of Bella, naked, in a bathtub, surrounded by candles and sipping on a glass of wine made my pants a little tight.

She smirked at me as if she knew what I was thinking. She kissed Charlie goodbye and then approached me.

Her lips were warm and wet as she sucked on my lower lip. Charlie was standing on the front stoop picking at a piece of wood that had come loose. Bella pushed me backwards a little so that we were hidden by the door. Her hand slid down and rubbed me through my cargo pants. Then she grabbed my cock firmly and began stroking.

"Ah, ah..." I gasped as my eyes rolled back into my head.

"You are too easy," she whispered against my mouth.

I placed my hand over hers and helped her for a moment.

"Don't start something that you can't finish right now," I growled.

Then I peeled her hand away and gave her one more chaste kiss. I adjusted myself before turning around to face my son, who was still completely absorbed in the imperfections of the porch.

"You ready to go, buddy?" I asked, swooping him into my arms and over my shoulder.

"Daaaaddddy," he squealed. I ran back to the house with Charlie giggling the entire way.

XXXXX

The afternoon was absolutely and utterly exhausting. Charlie and I played in the backyard until the air started to get chilly. Then I took him to the diner for dinner and a slice of cherry pie where we ran into Angela Weber and her boyfriend Ben. They were more Bella's friends in high school than mine, but they still looked a little guilty when they saw Charlie and I interacting.

Several other people that knew me or my parents or my siblings approached us too. Most of them knew Charlie and didn't seem at all surprised when he called me 'daddy'. I was an absolute idiot for not keeping in touch with anyone.

The most awkward part of the evening came when Lauren Mallory stopped by our table.

"Oh, my," she laughed. "I never thought I'd see the day."

"Hey, Lauren," I said, grimacing.

"Edward Cullen, daddy extraordinaire. Finally come back to claim your progeny?"

I ignored her question.

"Charlie and I are having a boy's night, isn't that right?" I smiled at him and ran my fingers through his hair.

He nodded with a mouthful of pie.

"That's so sweet. And how's his mommy doing?" Lauren's voice reeked of jealousy, but that didn't stop her from putting her hand on me and playing with the hair at the nape of my neck. She licked her lips and smiled seductively. I leaned away from her, but she persisted.

"She's fine."

I looked down and smiled to myself. There was one sure-fire way to get Lauren to back the fuck off.

"I've been wearing her out the last few weeks so I thought maybe I'd give her a chance to get a good night's sleep."

I didn't actually mean it the way that it sounded. Both Bella and I were exhausted from the ups and downs we had been through the last three months. But Lauren didn't need to know that.

Lauren snapped her hand back as if she'd been burnt. "Oh. I didn't realize that you two were...a couple."

"Mommy and Daddy kiss a lot," Charlie chirped from behind me. I started laughing. I guess if Charlie had to pick a moment to pipe up with his observations, this was a good one. I turned back to face Lauren.

"Look, Lauren," I said in a low voice so that Charlie wouldn't really be able to hear me."What I have with Bella is really none of your business. But take a hint, I'm not interested in you or any other skank running around this town, or any-fucking-where for that matter. If you really need confirmation, then fine, I'll give it to you. We are much, much more than just a couple. She and our son are my life, my whole life. Now take your sleazy ass away from our table and let us finish our dessert in peace."

Lauren's mouth dropped open. I wanted to make a comment about how if she stood out on the corner with her mouth open like that for a little bit, she could probably earn herself a way home, but I didn't. It wasn't worth it.

_Wow, look at me being all mature and shit!_

I turned my full attention back to Charlie. I could hear Lauren huffing, but after a few minutes the click of her heels indicated that she had finally gone away.

When we got home from the diner I had Charlie use the bathroom. He hadn't gone all afternoon and I was beginning to think there was something wrong with him. I peeked into the bathroom and saw him sitting down on the toilet. I had sent him to the bathroom before, but this was the first time I had actually seen him pee. Why would a boy sit down to take a piss? I backed out, not wanting to be intrusive. I would ask Bella later.

For the next two hours, we did as my mom suggested. We colored and played with cars. Instead of building a fort, I took him into the music room. He sat on my lap while I played, his little hands covering mine as they moved across the keys. It wasn't the easiest way to play, but I didn't care. The joy on his face made it worth missing a few notes here and there.

At eight-thirty, I noticed him yawning.

"Hey, Charlie. Let's go put your pajamas on and we can call Mommy to say goodnight, okay?"

"But, I'm not tired," he whined.

"Sure you're not," I chuckled. "Come on, move it."

Charlie scowled, but got up and marched his way into the guest room where I had put his bag. He didn't make it easy on me. He acted like a limp noodle. I couldn't get him to stand or even sit up. He just flopped around as I shoved first his legs and then his arms into his pajamas.

"I'm going to call your mom," I announced, leaving his tiny little body on the floor and walking towards the stairs. I grinned to myself as I heard his light footsteps running after me. I was getting good at this daddy stuff.

I stopped at the top of the stairs and bent down. Charlie didn't miss a beat. He flung himself onto my back and I piggybacked him down.

I could have used my cell phone, but Charlie liked the house phone better. Its speaker phone was much better and easier to hear.

"Hello?" Bella's voice answered on the third ring.

"Hey."

"Hey, is everything alright?"

"Yes. We just thought it would be a good time to call and say goodnight."

"Are you having a good time?"

"Yeah. We've been all sorts of busy."

"Oh, good. What have you guys been doing?"

I pressed the speaker button and handed the phone to Charlie.

"Tell Mommy what we did today."

"We pwayed Star Wars outside."

"You did?"

"Uh huh. And we went to the diner and ate pie."

"Wow, that must have been yummy," Bella said enthusiastically.

"And Daddy talked to some girls."

Silence.

"Uh..." I stuttered.

_Whoops_

"Yeah. We saw a few people that I knew. Remind me later to tell you who?"

"Let me guess, a harpy?" Bella asked. There was a little bit of an edge to her voice, but I could tell she was trying not to let me hear it.

"Yes, but Charlie set her straight," I laughed trying to lighten the mood. "You remember that whole conversation we had in the kitchen this morning?"

"Which part?"

"About him trying to figure it all out?"

"Oh. Yeah, I do."

"He informed Lauren that 'Mommy and Daddy kiss a lot'."

"He did not," she squeaked.

"Oh, yes, he did."

"Hmmm, we will have to talk later," she purred. "I'd like to know her response to that."

_Phew!_

"What else did we do?" I prompted.

"We pwayed wif cars and at the pinano."

"Sounds like you guys had a busy day. Are you tired?"

"No," Charlie grumbled.

"Really?"

"Say goodnight, buddy."

"Goodnight, buddy," Charlie just barely got out before bursting into giggles.

I heard Bella laughing. "I love you, baby, be good for Daddy, okay?"

"K, Mommy."

I took the phone off of speaker.

"Don't let him talk you into staying up too late, Edward," she warned.

"I won't."

"Because, he'll be up at seven-thirty regardless and he will probably be very, very cranky."

"I know, Bella."

"You had a good afternoon then?"

"Fucking fantastic," I sighed, looking around to make sure that Charlie hadn't heard me.

"Good."

"What about you? Did you take that bath?"

"I'm getting undressed as we speak."

I nearly dropped the fucking phone. "Fuck! Really." I whispered.

"Uh, huh."

I heard the sound of water being disturbed and I imagined her sinking into the steaming water. It gliding over her pale skin and coming to a rest just above her tits.

"Edward?"

I wonder what she'd do in that bath. Would she touch herself? Would she think of me while she was touching herself?

"Edward?"

I winced as my hand grazed my now painfully hard dick through the thick material.

"Edward?"

"What?" I let out a long, hard breath.

"Go put our son to bed and stop trying to picture me naked."

"That wasn't very nice, you know."

"I'm sorry," she giggled.

I could hear the water splashing around.

"God, Bella, you're killing me."

"I'll see you in the morning," she cooed and then hung up.

"Charlie?" I called out.

No answer.

"Charlie, where are you, you little monkey?"

No answer

I thought that maybe he had gone upstairs so I checked the guest room. I was starting to get a little nervous when, on a hunch, I opened the door to my bedroom.

I heard giggling and saw a lump in my bed, under the covers.

"Where could my boy have gone?" I pretended to wonder out loud.

More giggling.

I sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Well, I guess I'll have to find him in the morning. I'm sooooo sleepy," I yawned dramatically and cuddled up to the lump.

"Wow, how did my bed get so lumpy?" I asked, poking at the lump.

Charlie threw the covers back. "It's me, Daddy," he giggled wildly.

"Ohhhhh, there you are," I laughed, wrapping my arms around him and pulling him into a hug. "I was looking for you."

"I was right here."

"I see that."

We were silent for a few minutes and then Charlie yawned again.

"I think it's time to go to bed."

"Daddy, can I sweep in your room?"

I didn't see why not. Bella shared a bed with him for a long time. Besides, it was a boy's night.

"Sure, buddy."

I tucked him up under the covers and went to change into my own pajama bottoms. I threw on a t-shirt as well.

It wasn't my intention to fall asleep as I crawled up next to him. He curled up into my side and snuggled against my arm. I wrapped my other arm around him, relishing in the feeling. This had to be one of those moments people are always talking about. Those moments that you realize exactly how empty your life would be without someone that you love more than life itself. When you recognize that the big man above knows exactly what he's doing. Yeah, this was definitely one of those.

I felt my eyes growing heavy with the sound of Charlie's breathing and before I knew it, I was being awakened by Charlie shaking me.

"Daddy. Daddy. Daaaaaddy."

"Huh? What the matter?"

"You're heavy."

I lifted my head and realized that my arm was pinning Charlie to the bed.

"Sorry, Charlie," I apologized.

I looked over at the clock. It wasn't quite seven. But I had to have fallen asleep by nine, which meant that I got ten fucking hours of sleep. I could not remember the last time I had slept like that.

I turned on the television in my room to PBS and let Charlie watch his shows while I took a shower. When I was done, I got both of us dressed and we made pancakes with chocolate chips for breakfast. Bella was going to kill me for doubling up on the sugar, but how often would we really get a chance to do a boy's night? Or morning?

We hung out until about ten-thirty. That's when Bella came over looking for us. My parents were home by noon and the five of us enjoyed lunch on the patio since the weather was fairly warm for late September.

The rest of the week was fucking crazy. We visited six different pre-schools. The first one that we picked out sounded fantastic on paper, but had way too many kids. The second was really good, but Bella was afraid that picking one without looking at any others was a bad idea. Four fucking schools later and we ended up deciding on the second school. It was in Port Angeles about six blocks from the office that Bella would be working out of and about a mile and half away from the clinic. The director gave us some paperwork to fill out. Bella wrote out a deposit check, which I tried to protest about, but she was adamant. I figured I'd let her go ahead and pay the fee and when I turned in the paperwork I'd just pay the entire year up front. She'd bitch and complain, yes, but there would be nothing she could do. She was going to have to get over this doing everything by herself attitude. He was my kid too, and it was my responsibility to help pay for things like school, clothes and food.

I understood why she didn't want me to pay for anything, especially since I had originally accused her of being after our family's money, but things had changed. We were a family now; we should share the responsibility.

It was while we were filling out said paperwork on Wednesday evening that I found a problem. Bella had handed me one of the forms to sign and I was drawn to it immediately.

"Um, Bella?"

"Hmmm?"

I pushed the paper towards her and tapped the pen. She looked at the paper and then at me.

"What?"

"His name."

"Charles Anthony Swan. That's right."

"Can we change it to Cullen?" I asked nervously.

Bella bit her lip "Your, uh...your name's not on his birth certificate, Edward."

"Oh," I said as I brought the paper back towards me.

"It's going to take some time to get it changed, but we already have the DNA results, so that cuts the time down a little bit," she said, resting her hand on top of mine.

"Thank you," I whispered ducking in for a quick kiss. We'd behaved ourselves fairly well since getting hot and heavy on Friday night and the near mauling the next morning. It was getting harder and harder, literally, but I wasn't about to mess this shit up because I was a fucking horn dog.

On Thursday morning we went to the park as usual, stopping by the coffee shop on our way. We drove separately so that I could head straight to Port Angeles afterwards. When it was time for me to head to work, I carried Charlie on my shoulders to Bella's car as he sang two rounds of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. I strapped him into his booster seat and turned around to give my girl some love.

"Don't forget about our date tonight," I simpered.

"Wouldn't dream of it. What should I wear?"

"Something casual. We're not going fancy."

"We're not?"

I smirked and shook my head. "Nope. Oh, and wear pants."

"Do I need to wear hiking boots?" she asked cautiously.

I barked out a laugh. "No, Bella. Shoes don't matter. I wouldn't recommend heels, but if you think you'll be comfortable in them, by all means."

She frowned at me. "Do you even remember who you're talking to?"

I laughed. "I remember that you moved quite well in a pair of pretty high heels when we went to Seattle for your birthday."

I watched as her cheeks pinked up. I kissed the tip of her nose and turned away.

"I'll be at your door by six."

I thought that I had gotten the last ebb in there, but I was wrong.

"Have a good day at work, dear," she teased.

I stopped mid-step and turned to face her. All I had to do was take a few long strides towards her and she was in my arms, her lips attached to mine. I must have caught her in the middle of a breath because when I pulled away she was gasping.

"I will, sweetheart, thank you." I flashed her my crooked smile and disappeared into my car.

XXXXX

Bella had no idea where we were going. She followed my instructions though. She was wearing a pair of skinny jeans, UGGs and a royal blue sweater. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail and she brought along a pair of knit gloves with the fingertips cut off and a fleece headband to keep her ears warm.

"You look really fucking cute," I said, winking at her as we got out of the car.

Bella blushed and it was brought to my attention, once again, that the girl fucking owned my ass. I would do anything for her.

"What is this?"

"What does it look like?"

"It looks like one of those carnivals from a horror movie."

"Oh, ho, ho. Come on now," I laughed. "It's not that bad."

She looked sideways at me and wrinkled her nose, before starting to giggle.

"I'm just kidding, it looks like fun. I've just seen too many horror movies."

"Well forget about them. I'm trying to show you a good time here. Dinner and a movie is such a cliched first date. I thought you deserved something a little more...creative and fun." I grinned "You know, let your hair down and relax a little."

"Are you trying to tell me I'm uptight," she deadpanned.

"Only on Thursdays," I teased without missing a beat. "And sometimes on Mondays."

She wrapped her fingers around my bicep and leaned into my shoulder laughing.

"I have to admit, Edward, this is much more impressive than anything I could have thought up. Show away, then."

We entered through one of those temporary chain link fences with the sign that says RENT-A-FENCE 1-800-BLAH BLAH BLAH. The ground was covered in dirt and hay and the air smelled of fried food, sugar, and grease. There were a lot of teenagers running around with their hands in each other's back pockets. They groped each other mercilessly, smoked cigarettes, talked in loud voices; they were just plain obnoxious in general.

"We weren't ever like that were we?" I asked.

"Well, I wasn't," Bella teased. "You, on the other hand..."

"Me?" I feigned hurt.

Bella laughed.

"Rides, food, or games?"

"Hmmm, let me think about that," Bella said tapping her chin. "I think considering that most of these rides spin around in circles, my stomach would rather do that first."

"Ah, yes, good plan."

We spent the next hour making ourselves sick before Bella put a stop to it.

"I'm done," she groaned. "I cannot handle one more ride."

I looked over at her and smirked. "That's a shame."

"You, have a dirty mind," she scoffed, slapping my arm.

I chuckled. "You love it."

"That I do," she said softly. "Now, feed me."

I threaded my fingers through hers and pulled her towards the food stands.

"What would you like? We have fried potato, fried dough, fried onions, fried sausage, fried pickles."

"Fried Pickles?"

"Yes," I nodded. "They are a carnival delicacy."

"Ew."

I laughed. "Alright then, oh, they also have hot dogs. You can even get it smothered in chili and cheese."

"Okay, don't go there. My last experience with a chili cheese dog was as it was coming back up from Charlie's stomach after you let him eat too much," she snorted.

Now it was my turn to say 'ew'.

"I want sausage," she mused.

I started snickering.

"Oh my God, Edward. How old are you?"

"You keep walking right into them, baby. In any case, you want sausage, I will give you sausage. A big, thick, juicy sausage."

She was trying not to laugh, but was entirely unsuccessful.

I ordered two bratwursts and handed one to Bella. She pulled the red plastic ketchup bottle from the shelf and squeezed it all over before handing it to me. I shook my head.

"I'm a mustard kind of guy."

I covered my brat in mustard and we stood in silence, eating, for several minutes.

"You've got mustard on your lip," Bella said pointing to her own mouth.

"Huh?"

"Mustard. On your lip. Right there."

"Where?"

"Right there, she said finally pointing at me."

I purposely kept missing the spot where I could feel the mustard.

"Just get it for me."

She reached her hand up to my mouth and used her thumb to wipe it away. I grabbed her wrist, looking at her and flashing her a devilish grin before sucking her digit into my mouth and swirling my tongue around it.

She bit her lip and her pupils dilated. I pressed her up against the side of the hut and crushed my mouth against hers.

The taste of her ketchup and my mustard together was delicious. I ran my hands down her sides and rested them on her hips, grinding myself into her while molesting her mouth. I had completely forgotten where we were for a few minutes, but it didn't last nearly as long as I needed it to.

"Get a room!" I heard someone shout.

Bella and I both laughed. I reluctantly pulled away and took a deep breath to calm myself.

"What's next?" I asked

"I'd like to finish off my sausage," Bella grinned. This time, she was fully aware of the sexual innuendo she was putting forward.

"Be my guest, baby," I smirked. "Better you than me."

Bella shoved me away and I laughed.

"So, games?"

"Okay, are you going to win me something?"

"I will win you anything you want, sweetheart."

She sort of jumped up and down on the balls of her feet and I put my arm around her shoulders to lead her towards the games.

I couldn't for the life of me knock all the bottles off the table no matter how hard I threw that fucking baseball, but I did manage to win her a small stuffed animal at the dart game. The last game we tried was the ring toss. I caught the peg with the first ring, but missed the next two. I bought another three rings and was just about to start tossing when Bella stopped me.

"Let me try," she begged, trying to grab for the rings.

"No."

"Come on, Edward, I want to try."

"Fine," I agreed handing her the rings.

I'll be damned if the girl didn't catch the peg with every single ring. The carnie guy handed her a blow-up sheep.

"Here you go, baby," she laughed. "I won you your very own blow-up doll."

All I could do was shake my head. "Do you want some cotton candy?"

"Maybe we can bring a bag home for Charlie."

We bought the cotton candy and started heading back towards the exit.

"Oh, oh, oh, Edward. Let's go see the fortune teller before we leave," she pleaded, pointing towards an old tent.

I grunted in protest. "Bella, those things are complete rip-offs. She'll look at your palm and tell you that you're going to have two point five kids, a dog, and a job making more money than you ever thought possible."

She pressed herself against me and batted her long eyelashes up at me.

"Have you been taking pouting tips from my sister?" I laughed.

"Have you ever said 'no' to Charlie?"

"Um, I don't think I've had to say no yet, why?"

"Let's just say, I've learned from the master."

I grunted again, this time in defeat. "Fine."

She dragged me into the tent just as a couple of teenage girls were coming out giggling.

I looked around at the room curiously. There were drapings and candles and all sorts of crazy weird ass shit hanging around.

Sitting in the middle of the room, at a small round table, was a woman. She couldn't have been more than thirty or forty. She had a gold headdress around her head on top of a scarf and looked very much the part of a gypsy.

"Sit down," she ordered in a soft voice.

Bella approached the table and sat down immediately. I hesitated. I didn't have a good feeling about this.

"You want a reading?"

Bella nodded. "Yes, I do."

"Are you sure?"

Bella furrowed her brow. "Um, yes?"

"Be sure," the fortune teller warned. "You may not like what I have to say."

"I'm sure."

"It's twenty dollars. Now, give me your hand."

I sat down next to Bella and watched as the woman studied her. I pulled out a twenty and threw it down on the table. She let go of Bella's hand and ran her hands over the clear ball that was sitting in front of her.

I rolled my eyes.

"You have a recently reunited family. A lot of pain, a lot of hurt, but so much love.

"Yes," Bella admitted quietly.

"Hmmm, this is a good pairing. So much passion and intensity. And the desire is overwhelming."

Bella blushed.

"But trouble is lurking, watching."

"What do you mean?" Bella asked swallowing hard and glancing over at me.

"A woman. I can't see her name, but she's going to cause problems. This woman, she has two faces, and her aura is black. You need to be careful, my dear."

_What the hell?_

"What kind of problems?"

I stood up, bumping the table with my knee. "Bella, come on. This is bullshit. Let's go home."

We seriously didn't need any foreboding. Hadn't we been through enough already?

"You need to be prepared. She will try to destroy you."

I grabbed Bella's hand and pulled her up. Before walking out of the tent I turned to face the fortune teller. "Thanks," I growled sarcastically.

"I only say what I see," she said sadly.

XXXXX

The drive home was quiet. I could practically see Bella's mind going over and over what the fortune teller had said.

"Bella, please stop thinking about it. She works for a travelling carnival for fuck's sake."

"She was right about the other stuff."

"Lucky guess. She's probably got a PhD in human behavior and body language."

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

Was there? There was probably several things I wasn't telling her. How much did she want to know? Should I tell her about what Tanya had done? Would it make her mad? I really didn't want to fuck up this night, but being honest was such a huge part of this new relationship we had. Probably more so than most relationships.

"Maybe I'm just being paranoid."

I sighed.

_Here goes nothing_

"Look, I don't think this has anything to do with what that woman said back there, but there's something you should probably know."

I didn't wait for her to respond and I didn't look at her. "I found out a few months ago that Tanya knew about Charlie."

I saw Bella tense up out of the corner of my eye.

"She saw you with him when she came home to visit one summer. A couple weeks later, I found her poking holes in my condoms."

"What?" Bella practically screeched, making me jump.

"I broke up with her, kicked her out and threw them all away, but..."

"Do you think that you may have used any of them?" she asked nervously.

I shook my head. "I don't think so. It was the first time she had been in my apartment since she had gotten home and I really do believe she did it in response to seeing Charlie. Look Bella, I'm not saying that I believe anything that whack-job back there said, but if I did, Tanya is the only person that I could think of that could possibly be vindictive enough to do or say something hurtful to either of us. I just wanted to be honest."

"You don't think she could have meant Lauren? I mean, she had the tits to come on to you when you were out with Charlie."

I shook my head. "Lauren's a cow, but she's harmless. Why are we even talking about this? It's a load of shit."

She was quiet for a few seconds, opening her mouth and then closing it again.

"What are you thinking?" I asked.

"I'm...you really were still using condoms after four years together?"

I chuckled half-heartedly. "You are the only girl I have ever not used one with. And I still get tested ever three months."

"I have to admit, Alice told me that, but I wasn't sure I believed it. I guess I just figured after that long together she'd be on some other form of birth control."

"She was. But can you imagine what would have happened if I hadn't taken other precautions? Plus, I'm pretty certain that she was not exactly monogamous with me either. "

"No?"

"Too many late night study sessions. And I happened upon some pretty vulgar texts from some guy named James too."

Bella was quiet again, longer this time.

"Did you get tested after Jessica?" she asked almost silently.

"I didn't touch her, Bella, but yes I did. And I had a full work-up after the last time I had sex."

_Shit!_

I hadn't thought about that night in a really long time. But now, here it was, staring me in the face.

"I did too."

Her admission took me off guard and distracted me from my thoughts.

"You did?"

She nodded. "Yes. That day that Alice was talking about diseases made me think. I had realized that I just couldn't be with him anymore and I made a doctor's appointment and got tested. We've always used protection, but..."

"I get it," I said grimacing. As hypocritical as it may have been, I didn't even want to acknowledge that she had been with Riley. Especially, not on our first date.

I grabbed her hand and brought it to my lips, kissing her knuckles. "Did you have a good time?"

Her worried face finally relaxed and she broke out into a smile. "Yes."

"Then focus on that please, not what some crackpot woman read in her crystal ball for twenty bucks."

Bella kept her hand threaded with mine for the rest of the car ride home. It was eleven o'clock and the main house was dark. There was a faint light in Bella's apartment and I could see flickering, indicating Alice was probably watching the television.

Bella walked up the steps in front of me, but held onto my hand behind her back. When we reached the top of the stairs, I couldn't help myself. I grabbed her and lifted her up onto the railing.

She grasped at me in a panic for a moment while I settled myself in between her legs and started kissing her collarbone. My hands secured her so that there was no chance of falling backwards, but I could see that she was still nervous.

"Do you want to come in?" she asked as she tilted her head backwards.

"It's never been a case of wanting, Bella," I breathed. "Is it a good idea?"

"I think it's a very good idea," she moaned softly as I dipped my tongue into the hollow of her throat.

_That's good enough for me._

I pulled her down swiftly and she unlocked the door.

Alice was curled up on the sofa with her head in Jasper's lap, fast asleep, when we entered the living room.

"Hey, Jazz. I didn't realize you were here," Bella greeted warmly.

"Yes, well, I got a call from Alice telling me that I needed to come get some daddy experience."

I covered my mouth as I choked out a laugh. "Seriously?"

"Uh huh. Apparently my mama finally got to her."

"Well, did you get some good experience then?" Bella asked teasingly.

"I sure did, sugar," Jasper smiled. "He's a good kid."

Jasper kissed Alice on the forehead and shook her. "It's time to go home, darlin," he whispered.

Alice groaned, rubbed her eyes and stretched her arms up above her head, nearly punching Jasper in the face.

"I want to hear about it, but I'm just too tired right now," she said sitting up.

"We can talk in the morning then," Bella laughed.

We said our thank-you's and our goodbyes and Bella and I were left alone.

"Would you like something to drink? I have a bottle of Merlot."

I shook my head and stalked towards her, capturing her lips in a fiery kiss. Her mouth was so soft, so sweet. I was so completely absorbed in making love to her mouth that I didn't even realize I was walking backwards until my back hit the dining table. I turned my head only for a moment, long enough to grab a chair and sit down, and she was in my lap, straddling me.

My dick was so hard I was pretty sure it could shatter granite. She ground her hips against me and I thrust myself upwards in response. Her hands were working through my hair, tugging firmly. It felt fucking incredible. I let go of her face and my hands started roaming up underneath her shirt, along her ribcage and up towards her breasts. I let my left hand move back down and rest on her ass while the thumb of my right hand slipped across her hardened nipple.

She let out a long and low moan eliciting another thrust of my throbbing erection. Her mouth moved down my jaw to my neck. I felt her tongue flick out at my earlobe and then her teeth scraped it gently. This was going to get out of hand really quickly.

She was still writhing against me as she reached down to the hem of my shirt and slipped her hands underneath it. Her soft fingertips caressed my abs and then moved up to my pecs, causing me to shudder.

_I will not have sex with Bella. I will not have sex with Bella. I will not... have sex... with.. Bellllllla._

She hit the barbell in my nipple and I gasped. Looking into my eyes, she graced me with the most devilish smirk I had ever seen. I saw her run her tongue over her upper teeth just before she brought her lower lip into her mouth and bit down.

_So fucking sexy_

She lifted my shirt up and I raised my arms to let her pull it off. I watched her as her gaze went straight to my nipple. She started kissing my neck again, sucking and biting. She worked her way down and I closed my eyes, knowing what was coming. She flicked the barbell a few times with her tongue, sending an intense rush of pleasure straight down to my cock. Then she sucked it into her mouth.

"Ahhhhhhh," I moaned breathlessly.

She let go of my nipple and I could feel her warm breath on my chest. She was panting slightly and moving her hips faster and faster against me. And then she said something that made my heart fucking stop and every last ounce of blood to rush to my cock.

"Edward, I want you so bad."

_Oh, Holy Jesus._

Those few simple words sent me out of control. I nearly jumped up, taking her with me. She giggled and wrapped her legs around my waist as I carried her to her bedroom. Her tongue was back in my mouth delving deeper and deeper. I shut the bedroom door with my foot, locked it and laid her gently on the bed. She scooted herself backwards towards the pillows and I crawled up after her, placing one knee in between her legs and my hands on either side of her shoulders. She grinned up at me and I kissed her again greedily.

This was lust filled and amazing, but I would absolutely not take her like this. I needed to be in control of what I was doing and at that moment, I didn't think I could be. But that didn't mean that everything was off limits. I could still make her feel good.

I peeled off her sweater and gazed down at her. Her skin was flushed, her chest heaving. My hands went to the button of her jeans and she closed her eyes. I pulled them down over her hips and she helped me by wiggling her ass. I backed up off the end of the bed and stood up.

Here's the thing about skinny jeans. They look fuck-hot on, but they are a bitch to get off. As I tried to yank them over Bella's ankles, I accidentally pulled her halfway off the bed.

"Oh, shit, sorry," I snorted, as she tried to keep her ass from falling to the floor.

I picked her up and set her back down on the bed. Since I was apparently completely incapable of stripping her by myself, she helped me pull the jeans from her body. It was such a debacle that it took me several minutes to realize that Bella was sitting before me in a pair of black lace cheekies that matched her bra.

_Holy shit! Abort, abort, you cannot resist this woman. You're going to fuck it up again, you asshole._

Bella leaned back on her elbows, her legs dangling off the end of the bed, and crooked her finger at me.

I crawled on top of her and smiled.

_God, I love you!_

We continued the rubbing and the grinding, not pulling back, but not going any further. I finally built up a little courage and slid my right hand down, down, down her torso, until it reached the edge of her panties, where I hesitated. She covered my hand with hers and completed the journey to the holy land. My hand glided over a small patch of hair and then I felt her, warm and slick, and begging. I dipped my middle finger in the wetness and relished in the sound that escaped from her. Her hand was still covering mine and she started to move it, encouraging me. Her hips rose off the bed every time my finger entered her. When she was no longer making any sound, I slipped a second finger in. She let out a soft cry and pulled at the comforter with her free hand. She was so fucking tight I was afraid that I would hurt her, but by her reactions, she seemed to be enjoying it.

I kept my palm pressed firmly against her clit as I worked her with my fingers. I used my free hand to push the material covering her breast away and I circled her nipple with my tongue before finally sucking at it. Her hip movements became more frantic and I increased my pace to match.

Out of nowhere there was a shrill cry. I winced, froze, and looked over at the door, which was still firmly shut.

"It's the baby monitor. He usually goes back to sleep, please don't fucking stop," she gasped. I kept pumping my fingers into her. She was getting close. I heard Charlie make a few more noises. It didn't sound like he was actually waking up, but I didn't know, and I was getting really fucking distracted.

"Bella, I don't….." but she was there. She removed her hand from on top of mine and placed in on my forearm just as I felt her muscles clamp down around my fingers.

"Ohhhhh fuck," she cried out softly arching her back up off the bed.

Watching Bella come on my fingers was almost an out-of-body experience. I could only imagine what it would be like to have her come on my cock.

I kept moving as long as I could feel her pulsing. When I finally removed my hand from her, I brought it to my mouth, licking and sucking my fingers clean. She opened her eyes and stared at me. She was breathing heavily, but her eyes remained dark and she was looking back at me intensely. Her taste was more exquisite than I had remembered and I immediately wanted to bury my face between her legs so I could drink it straight from the source.

It was completely silent. She was right, Charlie had apparently gone back to sleep. I laid myself down next to her, giving her a few minutes to calm down and me a few minutes to talk myself out of the increasingly uncomfortable situation in my pants. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

_Mike Rowe castrating sheep on Dirty Jobs. Gramma Cullen in her underwear. Emmett and Rose doing the nasty. Gross _

Yup, that did it. I felt myself deflate almost immediately. I kept conjuring up the nastiest images I could, but suddenly, images of Bella's naked flesh sprawled out underneath me invaded my mind like a fucking forest fire. My imagination was so vivid that I could almost feel her.

_Wait. Oh fuck!_

I opened my eyes and they nearly popped out of my head. "Oh, for the love of God, baby...what are you doing?

**_XXXXXXX_**

**_AN: Are you all getting blue bits yet? LOL. One half of our duo released the pressure at least. Do you think the other one will too? Hmmmmm. I know you all want them to just do it already, but it just doesn't work that way. Especially with the past that they have. Don't worry, it will be worth it. ;-D_**

**_Don't forget to check out the sparklingcitrus(dot) com g-chat author interview. I'm such a fascinating person. (cough cough) LOL. _**

**Leave me some love, please. Review teaser is waiting to be released. **

**Next week: Edward tries to teach Charlie to pee like a boy. :o)**

Rec:

**Evading Edward by VampiresHaveLaws:** Bella's first encounter with Edward instantly leads to a mutual dislike. She is the new girl in town that has attracted more than one admirer and he's the boy who usually gets what he wants. So how will one evade when the other is set to conquer?

I love this one. I love the banter between E & B as they try to one up each other. Go read it. :o)

Okay peoples, until next week.


	21. Declarations

**AN: ****I think I'll keep this one kinda short. **

**Thank you everyone for your continued support of this story and for all the reviews and PM's. To Mel my fabulous and patient pre-reader, thank you always. And to Mollie, my fanfic soul-mate, :-D I do not know where I'd be without you. **

**This is a transition chapter. There is a lot going on and we are setting things up for a little bit of action. Please remember that this story is rated M for a reason and it earns it's rating straight from the start. **

**Everything recognizable belongs to Stephenie Meyer, the story itself, is mine. **

XXXXXXX

Chapter 19: Declarations

EPOV

"Oh, for the love of God, baby...what are you doing?"

I hadn't even noticed that she had moved, but when I looked down the length of my body, Bella was standing, topless, at the end of the bed. She still had her cheekies on, but I was a little too distracted by her perfectly pink little nipples as she leaned over the lower half of my body. Her hands were gripping me between the tops of my thighs and my hip bones, or rather, she was gripping my pants. She rolled her tongue over the trail of hair that led from my navel downwards and then dipped it slightly below the waistband of my pants. Before I knew what was happening she ripped open the button of my pants with her teeth and yanked my pants down to my knees.

She stared at the outline of cock that was completely obvious through my boxer briefs. At least, I thought that's what she was staring at, but then she looked up at me and giggled.

"Pink, Edward?"

"What?" I asked throwing my hands up behind my head. "Real men aren't afraid to wear pink. Besides, they're not pink, pink."

"They're hot pink with black stripes."

"Did you take off my pants simply to tease me about my underwear?" I smirked.

"Would you like me to help you put them back on?" she asked coyly.

I started kicking them off and once they fell to the floor I answered her. "No."

"Then shut-up and kiss me," she demanded as she climbed on top of me, resting her sweet little hot spot directly on top of my aching erection.

I sat up, growling, as I crashed my mouth into hers. I covered her breasts with my hands and began kneading them. She moaned into my mouth and squeaked a little when she felt my cock twitch beneath her. I was more than just a little disappointed when she pulled back. That was, until she shoved me back onto the bed. She held my wrists against the mattress and dangled those perfect tits above my face. I lifted my head, catching one with my mouth. I was pretty sure that I could have easily broken free from her hold, but fuck me if the domination shit wasn't making me even harder.

_I wonder if she's into kink. Oh, God. I wonder what she'll let me do to her?_

I had all sorts of depraved images running through my head as I licked and sucked at her the best that I could while being restrained.

"Ah, ah, ah," she scolded sitting back up.

"Give them back," I whined. But she shut me up as she rocked against me, stroking me with her barely covered pussy. I threw my head back. Heat, so much heat, wet heat, soaking through her panties and onto me.

"Fuuuuuuck, Bella."

I realized very quickly that I was missing the show and focused back on the mostly naked woman on top of me. I reached up to cup her breast again, but she shifted away, climbing off of me.

Was she teasing me? Was she trying to kill me? Fuck no, I wasn't going to accept that.

"Bella, please," I begged, closing my eyes and rubbing myself in a poor attempt to get some relief.

"What are you begging me for, baby?" she purred. "I'll do anything you ask; anything."

I felt her fingertips drag across my lower abdomen. I didn't speak and I tried not to move as she lowered them for fear that she would stop.

_Lower, lower, lower._

I lifted my hips slightly to allow her to pull my underwear down, and felt a slight breeze as my dick was freed. It shifted slightly and rested heavily against my stomach. She removed my underwear, dropping them to the floor and I held my breath as her hands glided back up the outsides of my thighs, moving inward at an agonizingly slow pace. In the silence, I heard her take a long slightly turbulent breath.

"Fuck your cock is gorgeous," she sighed. "I can't wait until it's inside of me."

_Neither can I. Holy shit, who is this woman?_

I whimpered when she finally touched me, her warm hands cradling my cock almost delicately. She put pressure on the base and moved her hand upwards before squeezing tightly just below the head.

I groaned in pleasure. She repeated her movements a few times and then swept her thumb over the head, collecting the pre-cum that had started to drip out. She stared at her thumb for a moment before her tongue darted out and licked the moisture away. Our gazes met and I could see a twinkle in her eye that meant that she was up to something.

I watched as one of her hands caressed her breast before making its way down and into her panties. My mouth dropped open when I could see her slip a finger inside her pussy and then another. I could hear how wet she was as she pushed in and withdrew a few times, all while continuing to stroke me. When she withdrew her hand, I could see it glistening with the evidence of how I was affecting her. When she wrapped that hand around me, spreading herself all over my cock and making everything slippery and wet I nearly fucking died. I felt my balls tighten and had to will away my body's need to release.

_I can do this. As long as she doesn't...oh, God._

"Bella?" I gasped as I felt her tongue caress the underside of my cock.

Her hand was still moving, but the feel of her mouth on me, tested my control once again and almost made me cum on contact. She traced her tongue upwards and then around the head, finally ending at the slit. She flicked her tongue a few times, making me buck my hips upwards. What she was doing to me made me want to scream. It was pure torturous ecstasy.

"Fuck, oh shit, Bella," I moaned as she slid her whole mouth over me taking me all the way back until I could feel myself hit the back of her throat. She had stopped moving her hand as much, but it was still holding the base of my cock tightly as her mouth took over. She had hollowed out her cheeks, but had kept her tongue flat against the vein so that there was extra friction and, occasionally, when she hit the head she'd add a little flick to the rim.

The pressure was building furiously and I was going to lose myself completely very soon. I had wanted to watch her suck me, but I was afraid of losing my load too soon. I knew that the minute that I saw those beautiful pouty lips wrapped around my cock, I would blow. I didn't want her to think that I couldn't last. But now, now was the time. I was just about to lean forward and open my eyes when I heard shuffling over the baby monitor.

My hands shot to the back of her head. She paused for just a moment and then kept going, this time faster. I finally looked down at her. The sight was more beautiful than I thought possible. I could see her tits bouncing every time she came back up and I was kind of sad that I couldn't reach them. There was only one sight that could surpass what I was seeing right now.

"Oh, Fuck, Bella, I'm gonna come," I groaned. She looked up at me and I saw in her eyes that she had no intention of moving. She knew exactly what she was doing. She wanted this, me, to come in her mouth. That fact alone caused my balls to tighten. I gripped her hair as I exploded with almost erratic convulsion.

"Ugh, ah, fuck, shit," I grunted as I spilled everything I had down her throat. I could feel her throat constricting around me as she swallowed. I was gasping for air, my head started to swim and I thought for sure that I was going to pass the fuck out.

" Moooooooooommmmmy!"

You have got to be fucking kidding me!

Bella lifted her head, letting go of my cock, and let out a huff of air as she stood up straight. And then, she started laughing. I threw my head backward onto the mattress and growled. It really was just my luck.

I sat up with her still standing between my legs. My hands grasped her ass and I buried my face in her cleavage.

_Just fucking perfect!_

"I love your tits," I mumbled, moving my head so that I could draw one of her nipples into my mouth.

"Moooommy?"

I couldn't help but throw a little bit of a temper tantrum. I flopped myself backwards onto the bed again grumbling.

Bella pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms and a t-shirt. I looked over at her and she was giggling. She was giggling so hard she let out a little snort.

God damn it, she was too fucking cute for her own good.

She walked over to the end of the bed, picked up my underwear and crawled up my body seductively, hovering over me.

"Welcome to parenthood," she grinned and dropped the underwear down next to me. "At least it didn't happen a few minutes earlier."

I grabbed her and flipped her over onto the bed. She squealed a little bit.

"You are a smartass, Bella Swan."

Charlie called out again and I heard the unmistakable sound of a door opening in the hallway. I knew that I had locked the door, but just in case, it was probably best to get dressed.

"I don't know what's going on. He rarely wakes up in the middle of the night," she scowled.

I let her up with a final chaste peck to the lips and hopped off the bed, pulling my boxers on.

One thing I was absolutely certain of; when I finally did make love to this woman, we would be completely alone. I adored my son, but there was no way that I was going to get interrupted while trying to show his mother how much I loved her.

I slipped into my pants and shirt. Bella turned to leave, but paused.

"Do you want to help?"

"Yeah, sure. Do you think it'll be okay?"

"Why wouldn't it be okay?"

I shrugged. "I don't know."

"It'll be fine, Edward." She turned and walked out the door as I followed. Charlie's door was open and he was standing just inside his bedroom. Bella lifted him up.

"Hi, baby, what's the matter?"

"I hafta go potty."

Bella turned around quickly. I was standing right behind her and she crashed into me. I reached out to steady her and ended up grabbing Charlie out of her arms.

"Hi, Daddy," he said groggily.

"Hi, Charlie." I couldn't help but smile at him. His little head was bobbing and I put my hand on it so that he would rest against my shoulder.

"Can you take him to the bathroom?" Bella asked me.

"Uh, what do I do, he's practically asleep?"

Bella shook her head, but she was smiling.

"Just sit him on the pot, he'll be fine."

"Sit?"

"Yeah, sit."

"I meant to ask you about that. Shouldn't he stand?"

She stopped smiling, but I could still hear the amusement in her voice. "Edward. I have no idea how to teach a little boy how to stand and pee. If you would like to take that on, be my guest, but may I make a suggestion?"

I rolled my hand to let her know to proceed.

"Wait until he's actually awake to start the lessons."

I nodded at Bella and turned to take him into the bathroom. He really was still half asleep and when I set him on the toilet he slumped over. But sure enough, I heard the telltale sound of a little boy who had to go pee. I returned his pajama bottoms to their rightful place and then lifted him into my arms. I walked back across the hall and Bella motioned for me to lay him down in his bed. I set him down and backed up towards the door. I watched as Bella pulled the covers up over his chest and brushed his hair back away from his forehead. Poor kid inherited my crazy ass hair. I could hear her singing softly to him as his lashes fluttered. The absolute adoration in her eyes for our son completely floored me. My throat caught as I thought about the decisions that she could have made when she found out she was pregnant. But she carried him, she bore him, she loved him.

_What an amazing fucking woman._

She kissed him on the forehead and stood up. Once she had closed Charlie's door, we walked into the kitchen. She pulled out two glasses and filled them with water before handing one to me. She started sipping hers, looking down and when she looked back up I was nearly knocked to the ground by her question.

BPOV

"Will you stay?" I asked, shifting my water glass to one hand and shoving the tip of my fingernail into my mouth.

Edward's mouth opened and closed and then he sighed. "I don't think my back can take another night on the sofa, Bella."

_Why can't I just fucking ask?_

I swallowed hesitantly. What if he said no? What if he said yes?

"I didn't mean on the sofa, Edward," I whispered shyly.

How I could be shy at this point was beyond me, but I was. The last week had been so completely perfect. Sometimes I really did feel like I was seventeen again. The way Edward made me feel was like nothing I had ever experienced before in my life. Even the little things, like telling me that my stretch marks were sexy because it was a symbol that I had created life, his child's life. I wanted nothing more than to let him do what I knew he desired, but I also realized that the sun starting to shine through the blinds meant that we wouldn't be alone for long.

It made me sad that Edward didn't think he got to spend much time with Charlie. The demand that he take Charlie so that I could sleep in had been made in jest, but it appeared as though it really would be good, for both of them.

I had taken Charlie to visit my dad that morning. He greeted us warmly and then they kicked a soccer ball around the backyard for about an hour. As Charlie was playing in the now completed tree house, my dad sat down next to me.

"So. You and Edward, huh?" He didn't sound upset, just very matter-of-fact.

"Yeah, Dad, me and Edward."

"Is it serious?"

"I...I think so?"

My dad looked over at me. "You think?"

"We haven't exactly defined it yet. It's...it's complicated."

"Complicated," he nodded. "Okay."

That was it. The end of the conversation.

When Edward took Charlie for the night, I almost didn't know what to do with myself. Every other time someone had taken him for me, it had been to go out. This was the first time that I could remember that I was in my house, by myself, without having to worry about the baby monitor or anything else.

I tried not to let jealousy flood through me when they called to say goodnight and Charlie mentioned Edward talking to other girls at the diner, but it was hard. It's not that I didn't trust him, but I was still a little bit insecure. He quickly made me feel better when he told me what our son had said to Lauren. Lauren Mallory hadn't left Forks, at all. I don't know if she didn't want to, or couldn't afford it, or what, but she had stayed; shacked up with a guy who had graduated a few years before us for a couple of years and was apparently single again. Of course she would try to make a play for Edward, but in front of our son? Classy.

The rest of the night I relaxed in the bath with a glass of wine and some soft music and made myself cum as hard as possible with nothing but my fingers, visions of green eyes and a pierced nipple in my head.

I slept for nine hours that night. When I woke I stayed in bed for an hour and then finally got up to make myself a cup of coffee, climbed back into bed, and watched the news for another hour. It was fucking heaven.

Our date? Oh my God. It was the sweetest thing he could have possibly done for me. Not that I wouldn't have appreciated dinner and a movie or something of the sort, but the carnival was exactly what I needed. He was right, even though I knew he was joking, I had a tendency to be uptight. I suppose it came from years of constantly being on edge, of looking over my shoulder. I was such an idiot and it was going to take years for me to get over that fact.

My heart nearly stopped every time he came in for even the simplest of kisses or when he held my hand, showing the world, or at least a small part of Washington State, that we belonged to each other. I had fun. I had a lot of fun. Until that stupid fortune teller. Why the hell had I insisted? With all the shit that Edward and I had been through, I should have known that we'd get a fucking warning. I was hoping for something sweet, something easy, like 'you're going to get married and have a bunch of babies'. Yes, I was already thinking about that. How could I not? Every time I turned around I had to hold myself back from saying those three little words to him. Why was I holding myself back? Because I was scared that maybe it was too soon. We had only just started to figure this shit out. It didn't matter that there were years and years of repressed emotions. We were different people now. Different from who we were four years ago and different from who we were four months ago.

But I wanted him. Oh God did I want him. That, I wasn't scared of in any way, shape, or form. I had hoped that he was ready. When he carried me to my bedroom, I thought for sure that he was. The way that he made me feel when his fingers were inside of me. Gah! He was so tender, commanding my body to give itself to him. And it did; I did. I didn't just want to reciprocate. I wanted to show him exactly how much pleasure I longed to give him. The feel of him in my hands was incredible. I don't know where I got the idea to spread my own arousal all over him, but the response he gave me when I did it was exactly what I had anticipated. Never in my life had I needed to taste a man so badly. The mixture of our juices was an unexpected, but very welcomed turn on. I was by no means skilled at giving blow jobs, but seeing him long and hard, weeping and practically begging, seemed to bring forth my inner seductress. The contrast of soft skin and his hard shaft in my mouth and on my tongue was incredible and I drank up every last drop that he released.

The man owned me and I wanted him to have me; the way that it should have been. I wasn't some inexperienced little girl anymore. I knew how things were supposed to feel. I knew what felt good and what to do to give us both toe curling orgasms. I knew that he cared about me. I could see it in every move he made, in every glance, in every touch. But he kept pulling back and I didn't understand why. I knew he wanted me too, but something was holding him back.

"I...I don't know, Bella. You want me to stay with you?"

I nodded.

"In your bed?"

I nodded again.

Edward started fidgeting. He was shifting his weight from foot to foot and he ran a hand through his hair.

"You don't have to. I was just asking."

"Ha," he chuckled slightly.

I couldn't help, but be disappointed. "Why don't you want to have sex with me?" I asked, trying to keep myself from crying.

Edward choked violently on his water. It took him several minutes to get himself under control.

"Oh my God, is that what you think?" he looked at me incredulously.

I shrugged. "You keep pulling away. Every time we're close, you..."

"Fuck, Bella," he interrupted. "It's not that I don't want to have sex with you. God, I do, but...but I'm really fucking scared."

He opened his arms for me and I walked into them without hesitation. I needed to feel his comfort, his reassurance.

"The only time I've ever had an emotional connection during sex was the last time I had it with you and those weren't good emotions."

_Really?_

"What do you mean, you've never had an emotional connection? I mean, I get that sex was just sex for you, but...you really felt nothing?"

He shook his head. "Nothing. I wasn't...emotionless all the time, but I just detached my brain from the act. I allowed myself physical pleasure, but nothing more. I learned really quickly that there was no point."

I held him tighter. "You know it's not going to be like that, don't you?"

"I know it's not, but I don't want a quick fuck just because we're horny and are afraid of running out of time before a certain little someone comes to find us.

He tilted my head upwards and planted a soft kiss on my lips. "I want to take my time with you." _Kiss_. "I want to worship you." _Kiss _"I want to taste you." _Kiss_. "I want to feel every inch of that sweet little pussy when I finally enter you." _Kiss_ "No interruptions, just us...you and me."

I gulped. Yes, gulped, loudly. Or at least, to my ears it was loud.

"I promise you, Bella, I will make up for every second that I fucked up, from the moment that I met you."

As my heart started doing back handsprings in my chest, Edward's lips massaged mine, his tongue rolling across my bottom lip before entering my mouth in the most sensual and erotic kiss I had ever experienced. I moaned and pressed myself against him as if I was trying to crawl inside his skin. It was not hard, it was not rushed. It was perfect, a silent promise. He pulled away and rested his forehead against mine.

"So as much as I would love to fall asleep and wake up wrapped around you like a boa constrictor, I think it's best if I go."

"Okay," I breathed.

I didn't want to let him go, ever, but I understood what he needed. He needed me to be patient. As fucked up as my first time had been, I got over it. I was able to move on and have other experiences, none of them particularly emotionally satisfying, but none of them traumatic. Edward had spent years feeling nothing regarding sex and the first time he did, it had gone terribly wrong.

He gave me one more gentle kiss and then left to go back to the house.

XXXXX

Saturday morning was the day. The day that Edward had sworn he would teach Charlie to pee "appropriately". He missed the first pee of the morning. The rules were that the moment Charlie woke up he had to go to the bathroom. That way we avoided accidents due to laziness. But after bringing donuts, coffee, and vanilla milk for breakfast, he was primed for the second pee.

I watched from the doorway as Edward marched Charlie into the bathroom. They were facing the toilet. Charlie looked a little confused.

_This is going to be good._

"Okay, buddy. So you gotta go pee, right?"

Charlie nodded.

"So, instead of sitting on the pot like you do to take a dump..."

I snorted and nearly spit out my coffee. Edward looked over at me.

"Kid friendly words, Edward," I laughed.

He frowned a little and then looked back at Charlie. "Um, you sit down to take a poop..." He glanced over at me again and raised his eyebrows and I nodded. "but when you pee, you stand up."

Charlie looked at me as if to ask, _is this guy crazy_?

"Mommy doesn't stand up."

"That's cause mommy's a girl. Girls sit down; boys stand up."

"Why?"

Edward's face went blank for a moment and I could practically see him trying to figure out how to answer that question.

"Um, because...because we can?"

I snickered and Edward scowled at me.

"I'm sorry," I mouthed.

Charlie looked skeptical.

"See, buddy, boys have..."

"A penis," I supplied, not wanting to give Edward a chance to teach Charlie any slang at this point. "He knows what his penis is, Daddy."

"Yes, a penis. And the best part of being a boy is that all we have to do is point and shoot and we can pee anywhere."

Charlie's hand shot down to his own crotch and he started to squirm a little.

"Edward, you're going to lose your chance if you don't hurry," I suggested, recognizing the signs of desperation starting to creep up.

Edward blew out some air. "Okay, buddy, drop trow."

When Charlie didn't move, he tried again. "Pull down your pants," he clarified.

Charlie bent over, shoving his pants and underwear to the floor. Edward lifted the seat to the toilet.

"Now, just point your little todger there at the water and go pee."

_Oh shit! This is a recipe for disaster._

I watched as Charlie shifted his hips forward a little and let loose. His little pee stream went everywhere, but in the toilet. Edward covered his face with his hand and pinched the bridge of his nose.

At this point, I was practically rolling on the floor in hysterics. "You're cleaning that up," I choked.

Charlie pulled his pants up, looking pleased as punch.

"I peed like a big boy, mommy," he said proudly.

"Yes, baby, yes you did," I managed through my giggles and snorts.

"Good job, buddy," Edward said, ruffling his hair. "Wash your hands. Next time, we'll try to get some in the toilet, okay?"

Charlie nodded his head as he stepped up onto the stool, washed his hands, and bounded out of the room.

Edward sauntered up to me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I tilted my head backwards, still grinning wildly and trying to control my amusement.

"You think it's funny, do you?" he asked me with a smirk.

I nodded.

"Did you know that was going to happen?"

I shook my head no.

"Mmmm, sure you didn't."

He took my lips in between his and I could feel my body lighting on fire. He took it a little deeper, pushing his tongue into my mouth, exciting me. I was just about to wrap my hands around his head and into his hair when he pulled back.

"I have piss to clean up," he smirked.

I scoffed as he let go of me and walked away in the direction of the kitchen. Edward Cullen was definitely going to be the death of me. I was going to explode in one gigantic fiery ball of sexual frustration.

Four hours later, we were back in place.

"Okay, this time, you're going to have to hold onto yourself, buddy.

I watched as Edward went through the motions as Charlie looked up at him. "Pull down your pants. Good. Now, use your hand to hold onto your...penis." I cleared my throat lightly and grinned as Edward pretended to grab onto himself. "Now, point it at the water. Good. Now, pee."

Charlie stood there for a few seconds. I could see that he was really squeezing himself.

_Oh, that can't be good._

Whatever he was doing, instead of going in the toilet, his spray went sideways and straight onto Edward's pants.

"Dude!" Edward yelled, hopping up and down.

I covered my mouth to cover the barking laugh that had escaped my throat. But just as quickly, my lips pursed into an "o". Charlie's lower lip was practically hanging to the floor and was trembling. I fisted my hand and pressed one end against my mouth.

Edward had grabbed a towel and was wiping his legs furiously. He didn't even notice what was about to happen. Charlie's eyes filled up with tears. It wasn't until he started whimpering that Edward looked up at him.

"Wha...what's the matter?"

Charlie burst into tears. Edward's face was panicked.

"Jeez, buddy, what happened?"

Charlie didn't answer. His pants were still down around his ankles and his hands were at his sides.

Edward looked up at me. "What the hell happened?"

"He thinks you're mad at him," I said softly.

Edward grabbed Charlie's shoulders, bent down and turned him around, pulling up his pants before drawing him into a hug.

"Oh, Charlie, I'm not mad at you, buddy, I just got startled."

Charlie continued to wail and sob and snot all over the place. His arms had found their way around Edward's neck, but he was crying too hard to talk.

Edward looked heartbroken. He lifted Charlie into his arms and stood up, passing by me and walking towards the living room.

When I got there, Edward was rocking Charlie back and forth in his lap, whispering words in his ear. Charlie was nodding. Edward kissed the top of his head and continued rocking him. I decided to give them their moment and went into the kitchen.

A few minutes later Edward and Charlie wandered in. Charlie wiped the sleeve of his shirt across his nose and hiccoughed once.

"Everything okay?" I asked Edward quietly.

"Yeah." He reached into the fridge, pulled out the milk and a sippy cup and once filled and covered, handed it over to Charlie. Charlie leaned against my leg, wrapping his arm around my thigh. He took the milk with his free hand and sucked at it for a few minutes. I couldn't really move with him attached to me like that, but I didn't need to, so I just stayed put.

Edward started going through the process of making a pot of coffee. "I'm getting you a single shot," he announced.

I wrinkled my nose. "Why?"

"Because it's easier than brewing an entire pot."

I opened my mouth to argue, but decided not to. It wasn't worth it. He looked so stressed out and I could only guess that it was from accidentally making Charlie cry.

Charlie let go of my leg and walked back out of the room. Edward was on me in an instant. He wrapped his arms around me from the back and put his forehead on my shoulder. I tilted my head so that my cheek rested against his head and ran my hand through his hair.

"That sucked," he mumbled into my neck.

I could feel my lips turn downwards into a frown. Poor Edward. My heart broke a little as I realized just how much that must have affected him. No one likes hearing their child cry, but knowing that you're the one who caused it, intentionally or not, makes it so much worse.

"He'll be fine," I soothed.

"What about me?"

"You'll be traumatized for a while, but eventually you'll be fine too," I teased lightly.

I felt him laugh against me and he lifted his head.

"Why don't you just _show him_?" I suggested.

"I thought that's what I was doing."

"No, I mean, show him. Let him see how you pee."

Edward furrowed his brow and lifted his eyebrow. "That sounds all sorts of wrong."

"That's how little boys learn, Edward. Why do you think I couldn't figure out how to teach him?"

"You don't think it will freak him out?"

"To see your penis?" I giggled.

Edward flipped me around and lifted me up so that I was sitting on the counter.

"Don't call it a penis," he said, nudging my nose with his.

"What would you prefer I call it?" I asked in a slightly husky voice.

"It's so clinical. When you're talking to Charlie, that's fine. When you're speaking to me, I want to hear you talk dirty." He nudged my chin upwards and attached his lips to my throat.

I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him closer to me. "Would you prefer that I say dick?"

"That's better."

"Or, how about cock," I whispered, emphasizing the 'K' sound..

Edward groaned and nipped at my collarbone.

_Here we go again._

"Edward?" I whimpered.

"Hmmm?" he hummed against my chest.

"Do you...do you happen to know when we're going to get some alone time?"

"Mmmhmm."

My head, which I had been leaning backwards shot up and I banged Edward in the head with my chin.

"Ouch, fuck," he grumbled.

"You do?"

"What?"

"When are we getting alone time?" I pleaded.

Edward's face twisted into that evil sexy crooked grin that pretty much made me soak my panties instantly. "Next weekend. My parents want to take Charlie to the Seattle Zoo."

"But that's only a few hours?" I whined. Okay, so it was probably more like all day, but I wanted all night. Was I a greedy bitch? Uh, yeah. He made me some pretty fucking awesome promises about what the experience would be like.

Edward shook his head very slowly. "They don't want him to spend six hours in the car in one day. They're booking a hotel room. They'll be gone from Saturday morning to Sunday afternoon. I was supposed to clear it with you."

"Fuck! Really?" I asked excitedly.

Edward started laughing. "I'm assuming it's okay with you?"

I squeezed my legs, wrapped my arms around his neck, pushing my breasts against him and smashed my mouth into his. Our teeth smacked into each other, hard, but I didn't care. We were getting over twenty-four hours with just the two of us.

Edward let me have my way with his mouth before finally pulling away. "Are you trying to kill me today? First my head and now my mouth. If you're not careful I'm going to end up in the hospital before we even have a chance to be alone."

I laughed and pushed him away, jumping down off the counter and going to fix us both some coffee.

By Sunday night, Charlie had the standing to pee thing down. Edward was so patient with him. It made my heart hurt with pride. He did as I suggested and took Charlie in with him every time he had to go to the bathroom. I didn't watch during those times. Even though I had already been up close and personal with his anatomy, watching him pee was a not exactly a turn on. I did watch when Charlie went. His aim wasn't the best, but he did manage to get most of his stream into the water, especially after Edward started throwing Cheerios in and telling Charlie to try and sink them.

"Where did you learn that?" I asked, amazed.

"My mom suggested it when I told her what we were doing?"

_Score one for Gramma Esme_

_I was so happy that I gave Edward a very appreciative hand job after Charlie went to sleep. He tried to return the favor, but I stopped him._

"But..."

"No buts. I like making you feel good. This was for you."

We spent the next half hour groping and grinding on the sofa before Edward reluctantly pulled himself from nuzzling my boobs to head home. The next morning came way too fast.

XXXXX

"I'm not ready for this."

"Come on, baby, yes you are."

"No, I'm really not, Edward. I can't do this. I thought I could, but I can't."

"You'll be fine, I promise. Just open up and let me in."

I shook my head.

"All the preparation to get to this point and you're just going to back out?"

"Yes, I'm backing out."

"Bella, you're being ridiculous."

"I'm not being ridiculous. I just...I just don't want to."

Edward swiped his hand over his face. "Bella."

"Edward."

"Are you serious? I can't wait any longer. You either let me in and we do this, or I have to go."

He was right. I couldn't put this off any longer. It was time to just get it over with, no matter how nervous I was.

I opened the front door and let Edward in.

"Thank you," he sighed loudly. "Where's Charlie?"

"He's probably trying to stuff his trucks into his backpack again. I've already taken them out twice this morning."

"Charlie, buddy, come on," Edward shouted before turning back to me.

"Baby, this will be good for him. And good for you."

"He's going to school, Edward," I cried. "My baby is too young to be going to school."

"He's not too young. He's perfectly ready for this. It's only seven hours three days a week, Bella. And you'll be working anyway."

"Today it's only until lunch."

"It is?"

"Yes. They want to give him a day to acclimate."

"Are you going to come back and pick me up then?"

"No. Jasper's taking the afternoon off. He's going to meet me there at noon and bring Charlie home. Then I'm going back to work. I'll pick you up at four-thirty."

"Let's go, then," he smiled taking me by the hand. "Charlie, time to go to school."

Charlie came bounding in, dragging his backpack behind him, a sure sign that there was something completely unnecessary in it.

"You go put him in the car, I'll do a contraband search."

Sure enough, there was one big truck, one small car and two matchbook cars shoved into the pack. I emptied it out and followed my boys out the door.

An hour later found me sobbing as my child walked into his classroom with the rest of the three and four year olds in Miss Dobson's Pre-school class. He looked back once, but was immediately distracted by a little girl who was holding a soccer ball in one hand and holding her skirt up with the other.

Edward laughed.

"It's not funny. Those little hussies better stay away from my baby," I frowned between sniffles.

Edward lifted his eyebrows.

"Oh shit, he's your kid, I'm going to be beating them away with baseball bats aren't I."

I had meant it to be a joke, but when I looked at Edward, he looked a little apprehensive.

"I was just kidding, baby."

Edward let out a breath and put his arm around me as he led me back to the car. "You sure you don't want me to drop you off and come pick you up?"

"Yeah, it's fine. I don't have to be there for another fifteen minutes so I've got the time. Maybe you can drive on Wednesday."

The morning went by agonizingly slow. I kept checking my phone to make sure that I hadn't been called. Of course, I hadn't. Charlie had done just fine. He jumped into my arms when I went to pick him up and asked when he could go back again.

"He did fine, Mrs. Swan." Charlie's teacher, Bobbi, smiled. She was young, maybe about twenty-five, a little bit taller than me with light brown hair and hazel eyes.

"It's Miss, I'm not married," I corrected. "Just call me Bella though."

"Oh, I thought...Charlie's dad..."

"My boyfriend's a Cullen. We're working on getting Charlie's last name changed, but it'll probably be a couple of months."

_Boyfriend?_

Holy shit! Was that what he was? I hadn't really thought about it, but I guess that's exactly what he was.

"Oh," she said. She blushed as though she were embarrassed. I had no doubt that she was having some sort of dirty thoughts about Edward.

_Speak of the devil._

"Hey, you," he purred as I picked up my phone.

"Hi."

"Everything go okay?"

"Of course it did. Jasper's strapping him into the car right now and I'm heading back to work."

"How's it going there?"

"Fine. Cammy didn't show up today, so it's just me and Luke."

"Cammy? Have you told me about her before?"

"Um, maybe. She's the other research assistant. She's really weird and I don't see her much, but I'm sure I've probably mentioned her."

"The name sounds familiar, but I can't remember."

"In any case. I'm heading back now, but I'll see you in a few hours, okay?"

"Yeah. Bye, baby."

"Bye."

I said goodbye to Charlie, thanked Jasper profusely, and went back to work. Luke and I were working on number computation. Luckily there was a computer program called SPSS that was fairly easy to use. We just plugged the numbers in and told it what we wanted to find out and it would compute it all for us. But it took about two hours to enter in one set of data. I lost my place twice and had to go over it with a fine toothed comb to see where I had screwed up, which took an additional forty-five minutes. But, at the end of the day, we had a beautiful set of graphs. If all went according to plan, we'd be finished with all the statistical data by the end of October.

At four-thirty I pulled up in front of Edward's clinic to see him standing next to a beautiful blond woman who was also wearing a pair of scrubs. She was almost as tall as he was and she was laughing at him. He had a goofy looking grin on his face and almost a sheepish expression. I had only heard Edward talking about Dr. Oleander so I assumed this woman was a nurse. She looked to be in her mid-thirties and I could see the diamond sparkling off of her left ring finger. He saw and started approaching the car with the woman in tow. I opened the door and stepped out.

"Bella, this is Heidi, the best nurse in Port Angeles." He snickered and Heidi smacked him on the back of the head.

_I kind of like this Heidi already._

"Heidi, this is my Bella," he grinned wrapping me up in his arms and kissing me firmly on the mouth.

"Nice to meet you, Bella," Heidi said reaching out to shake my hand. "I half expected you to show up with wings and a halo."

"Ha," I laughed, looking up at him.

He shrugged.

"I'm guessing that he only started mentioning me a few weeks ago then," I teased.

Heidi looked down and then back up at me. "He's been all googly-eyed an mushy for the last several weeks, yes," she laughed. Anyway, I'll let you two get going. My husband is going to be here any minute."

"It was nice to meet you, Heidi," I smiled. "I'm sure I'll be seeing you more frequently."

"I'm sure you will," she grinned and then winked at Edward.

I got back into the car and Edward climbed into the passenger seat. Before I could put my seat belt on though he pulled me to him and graced me with an incredibly passionate kiss.

"Wow," I breathed. "What was that for?"

"Bella?" Edward whispered, closing his eyes.

"What's the matter?" I cooed. I could see something in his expression, but I couldn't read it. He looked almost desperate.

He let out a breath of air. "Nothing. Nothing at all. Let's go home."

The entire way home we talked about my day and his day and what I knew about Charlie's day. We picked up a pizza and when we got back to my apartment, the three of us vegged out on the sofa, eating and playing Candyland. It was amazing how easy these moments had become for us.

Wednesday, we had the same routine, but Charlie would be in school until three thirty. I'd pick him up and we'd hang out for an hour in Port Angeles until Edward was done.

I saw Cammy's car in the lot and groaned. Luckily, I didn't really see her. Luke said he had sent her to the building's library, because she had already been driving him crazy.

After lunch and a quick call to see how Charlie was doing, I made my way back to the office.

Luke was at his computer with a sandwich in one hand and a bottle of coke in the other.

"Bella, can you come take a look at these numbers for me? Something's off and I can't see it."

"You think it's because you've been staring at the screen for six hours straight?" I teased.

"Only five," he chuckled.

I leaned over him and started going over the numbers on the paper tablet in front of him and comparing them to the numbers on the screen. About five minutes into my comparison I caught Luke looking at me. He quickly averted his eyes and I realized that my top was hanging down just enough for him to see down it.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

I adjusted my top and heard a clearing throat. I looked up and saw Cammy staring daggers straight at me.

"What the fuck are you doing?" she screamed.

"I'm working," I said, completely taken off guard by her sudden attack.

"No, you're not. You're trying to seduce my boyfriend."

My mouth dropped. I was absolutely not trying to seduce my boss.

"Knock it off, Cammy," Luke scolded almost like she was a child.

She completely ignored him. "You little skank. You've been after him for months."

"Oh my God, are you kidding me?" I scoffed. "Unlike you, I have a few scruples. I don't date my bosses. And I'm in a fucking relationship."

How dare she sit there and accuse me of anything. She's the one who had obviously stepped over the boss/employee line.

"Like it matters. What happened, Bella? Your baby daddy get tired of fucking the same loose pussy over and over; stepped out and now you're trying to get back at him?"

"Cammy!" Luke shouted. "That's enough. Go home. I don't need you here today."

"Like hell I am. I'm not about to leave you and little miss slut over there alone."

Luke jumped from his chair and grabbed her arm. "First of all," he said in almost a growl, "I'm not yours anymore. You're the one that fucked that up. Secondly, you have no right to talk about anyone else's behavior after what you did. Go home, cool off. Come back in on Friday with a better attitude or you'll be finding yourself another job."

"Oh," she laughed darkly. "I'd like to see you try it, baby."

She smacked her mouth against his roughly, before he had a chance to turn his head, and walked out the door.

Luke ran his hand roughly over his face. I could hear the rustle of his scruff just before he let out a long breath.

"I'm sorry about that, Bella."

"What the hell is her problem?" I asked, absolutely floored by what had just happened.

Luke rubbed his eyes. "I fucked up."

I searched his face. He looked so miserable, so exhausted.

"Luke, come on, what is going on?"

"Cammy's been working for me for about six months. When she first started, she seemed really sweet. She worked hard and was really eager to prove herself. We went out for drinks one night and I ended up going home with her. I never intended to do it. It just sort of...happened."

What he was saying didn't surprise me. I had figured that there was something going on between them for months.

"It wasn't bad at first," he continued. "She would spend about half her nights with me and nothing was really affected by it. I knew that it could be a problem and that I could probably get in trouble for it, but I figured that no one had to know and once we were done with the study, we could stop working together."

"Okay, but obviously things aren't okay now," I mused out loud.

"No. She started slacking on her work. She was working at the bar at nights and was always coming in late. She spent hours on the Internet or on her cell phone. That's why I hired another assistant, because I thought that she would get the hint, but she never did. And then about two months ago I was over at her apartment looking for a shirt that she had borrowed. I found a box in her closet."

I wasn't sure I wanted to know what was in the box. Cammy seemed like she could be one crazy bitch.

"It was photos of men, in her bed. Most of them were asleep or drugged up or something, but they were all naked. There were dates on every single picture and names on some of them. She had some sort of rating system on them too. It made me absolutely sick to my stomach. I even found a few of her...with them."

I grimaced. What a fucked up way to find out you were being cheated on.

"I confronted her. There had to be about two dozen of them dating back to just the beginning of the year. She reasoned that I had never said that we were exclusive. Bella, I about fucking blew my top. She had screwed at least half of the guys while we were together. I ended our relationship, but when I tried to tell her that I didn't want her around period, she threatened a law suit."

"Jesus Christ, Luke," I said shaking my head. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know what I can do. I can't fire her, not right now anyway. Once the study is done I can let her go, but that's a good two or three months away."

"What kind of fucked up person takes pictures of men they've had sex with while they're sleeping?" I asked, completely disgusted.

"I asked her the same thing. She said they were souvenirs and insurance policies."

"Insurance policies?"

Luke shook his head. "At that point, I didn't want to know. In any case, she's been a complete nightmare ever since. I've tried to ignore her, but that's not as easy as it sounds."

"Obviously."

"I really don't want to have to put you through this, Bella, but I need you. If you leave, then there is no way I'm going to be able to get this study done before my grant runs out."

"I'm not going to leave. Trust me, I've been at the receiving end of some pretty harsh words in the past. Plus, she's just throwing around insults. She doesn't know me or my situation, or Charlie's father in any way."

Luke sighed in relief. "Thank you, Bella. And...I didn't mean to stare earlier. I...got caught off guard and, well, I'm sorry."

"Look, I like working with you, but if there's ever a next time, I expect you to avert your eyes and let me know. Not only do I not appreciate it, but my boyfriend is the jealous type. I can just see him walking in on that. I don't think it would be pretty."

It was a subtle warning. I didn't need to make him feel embarrassed or uncomfortable, but he needed to know that it wasn't okay.

I left a little bit early that afternoon. As much as I was trying not to let Cammy get to me, her straight out bitchiness had put me in a bad mood. I sat outside of Charlie's school for half an hour with my eyes closed, listening to classical music before the other parents started arriving to pick up their kids. I made a stop at the coffee shop for a decaf Caramel Macchiato and just stayed there until it was time to pick Edward up.

"Hi, Daddy!" Charlie chirped.

"Hey, bud, how was school today?"

"Good."

"What did you do?"

"We ate lunch."

"Oh, yeah?" Edward laughed. "What else."

"Pwayed on the pwayground."

"Wow, sounds like they're keeping you busy."

He looked over at me. "Please tell me he's actually learning something."

"I don't know," I answered flatly.

Edward frowned. "What's the matter."

"Bad day."

"What happened? Anything I can help with?"

I shook my head. "I don't want to talk about it right now."

I knew I was being a little bitchy, and it wasn't Edward's fault, so I reached over and grabbed his hand, squeezing it.

"I'm sorry, I just want to forget about today."

Edward nodded, but kept a hold of my hand the entire way home.

That night, after Charlie went to bed, Edward and I cuddled up on the floor to watch a movie. I curled into his chest and he wrapped his arm around my waist and his leg over my thigh. It wasn't long before his hips started to move, pulsing against my backside. I started moving mine along with him and felt his hand sliding downwards. He slipped his hands underneath my pajama pants and got a little surprise when he discovered I wasn't wearing anything underneath.

"What are you trying to do to me?" he groaned.

I needed him. I knew that he wouldn't make love to me, not yet, but I wanted whatever he would give me.

"I need you, Edward, please," I begged.

He turned me over so that I was on my back and climbed on top of me. He was wearing a pair of sweatpants and when he lowered his weight, I felt him hard and ready.

"Anything to make you feel better, baby," he whispered, kissing me softly.

He pushed himself against me a few times until I gasped.

"Right there?" he asked repeating his last thrust.

"Yeah," I breathed. "Right there."

He rocked into me over and over; faster and faster.

I didn't have to direct him any further. He just fucking knew what I needed. We were completely clothed and yet everything he was doing was better than anything I had ever experienced.

"Oh, ah, Edward," I panted. "I'm gonna cum, ahhhh."

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," he grunted at about the same time.

He hovered over me for just a few seconds before lying down next to me with half his body still covering mine. We were both heaving, coming down from our highs.

"Thank you," I sighed.

"My pleasure," he responded.

I couldn't help myself, I started laughing. He propped himself up on his elbow.

"Feeling better?"

"Immensely," I giggled.

"Good. I aim to please."

We stayed like that for a little while longer before Edward declared that he really needed to go change his clothes.

"You should keep a change of clothes over here," I told him. "I mean, you're here all the time anyway."

"Expecting me to need a change of clothes often, are you?" he smirked.

"Shut-up," I laughed pushing him off of me. With a lingering kiss, he left me. Two more days and he'd stay, all night. I couldn't fucking wait.

XXXXXX

"How does a freaking three-year-old beat me at bowling?" Emmett huffed.

It was Thursday night. Emmett and Rose came down for dinner and the boys had announced that it was time for a Wii bowling tournament.

I snickered and took a swig of beer.

"He's my kid, Em, get used to it, he takes after his dad," Edward said, puffing out his chest and sitting on the edge of the sofa in the basement.

"Oh, yeah? I could beat your ass any day of the week, little brother."

"Pfft. Sure you could."

"Oh, God, here we go again," I snorted.

"Come on, little girl," Emmett said, tossing me the Wii-mote. "Show this douche what a real Wii bowler looks like."

"No, no, no. I'm not joining in this madness," I said, shaking my head as I moved in between Edward's legs facing him.

"What's the matter, gorgeous, you worried you can't beat me?" he goaded.

"Oh, I can beat you," I smirked rubbing my hand up and down his thigh.

"Hey now, there are children present," Emmett groaned.

Edward and I both turned our heads. Charlie was watching; his eyes darting back and forth between us. I bit my lip and tried to pull away, but Edward's hands on my hips stopped me. He pulled me closer and kissed my mouth gently.

"Are you gonna play with me, or what?" he murmured.

I giggled and pushed on his chest as hard as I could. He fell backwards onto the sofa and laughed.

"You're on," I said, grabbing the Wii-motes from Emmett and tossing one at Edward.

After two more games in which I decimated both of the Cullen brothers, Edward walked us back to the apartment.

As he went to tuck Charlie in, I got myself ready for bed. I heard them talking and stopped just outside of Charlie's bedroom.

"Daddy?"

"What, Charlie?"

"Are you and Mommy married?"

"No, buddy, we're not."

"How come?"

"What do you know about being married?"

"Miss Emma said she was getting married to her boyfriend."

"I thought your teacher's name was Miss Bobbi?"

"It iiiissss. Miss Emma is the other teacher."

"Oh."

"Mommy said you were her boyfriend."

_Oh shit!_

"She did?"

I grimaced. Fuck, I should have known better than to say shit like that around Charlie.

"Yes. Are you gonna get married?"

I heard Edward chuckle. "Go to sleep, Charlie. We'll talk about this later."

I bolted as quietly as possible to the living room. Moments later Edward walked in.

I looked up at him and he had a smile on his face.

"What?" I whimpered.

"Boyfriend, huh?"

I closed my eyes and bit my lip, hard.

"I'm sorry."

He grabbed my fingertips and pulled me to him. "What are you sorry for?"

"I shouldn't have made the assumption."

"Bella?"

"What?" I answered, not wanting to look at him. The tips of my ears felt really hot from my embarrassment.

"I need to tell you something."

I needed to tell him something too. I needed to tell him how much I needed him. How much he meant to me. How much...how much I loved him.

He placed his hands on either side of my face.

"Bella," he murmured softly, bringing his lips to my cheek and dragging them upwards towards my eye. "I...I," he swallowed thickly. "You are everything to me. You and Charlie, I don't know what I'd do without you."

"I know," I whispered. "I...

"Let me finish, please," he begged. "I have made so many mistakes in my life and there will probably be a shitload more to come. But I love you, and losing you because I'm an idiot will not be one of them."

I took in a deep breath. Did he just say...?

"I'm sorry, what?" I asked taking in a choppy breath.

"I don't know if you will ever be able to love me back, but I can't go another day without telling you how I feel right now. Not ten years ago, not four years ago, right now."

"Ah..." I choked. "I, oh..."

He started to pull back, but I grasped onto him. I mirrored his hold, framing his jaw with my hands.

"Say it again," I demanded, looking directly into his eyes.

"I love you."

"Oh, God."

I could feel the tears building up in my eyes and then quickly slipping over the rims.

"I love you too," I squeaked.

Edward's eyes widened. "You do?"

I nodded. "So much. I always have."

Our mouths found each other and our tongues tangled together passionately. I threw my arms around his back and clawed at him to bring him as close as humanly possible.

"I don't want you to go," I begged against his lips. "Stay with me."

"Okay," he panted.

He walked me backwards towards the hallway, accidentally bumping me into the wall.

"Fuck! I'm sorry," Edward swore against my mouth. I started giggling, but also refused to remove my lips from his. He shut my bedroom door behind us and we fell clumsily into bed. Edward was finally mine and I'd be damned if I was ever going to let him go again.

XXXXXX

**AN: That's not meant to be a cliffie. Edward has a plan and isn't about to mess it up.**

**I know a lot of you are worried about what is going to happen with the Cammy situation, but always remember that everything I write has it's purpose and the order I write things in is very intentional.**

**Next week: Bella and Edward finally get their alone time. **

**Reviews are always appreciated and will receive a teaser. They've dropped a bit lately, probably due to the lighter chapters, but please know that I always love hearing from you. :o)**

**Rec:**

**My Viking by sheviking**: Bella is captured by Vikings and brought with them to their home country where her new fate awaits. Can she ever find happiness being a slave? Will it make a difference that she is given to Edward to be his bed thrall?

This story is only four chapters in and I usually wait a little longer to rec, but it OWNS me. I love all of sheviking's stories, but this one is so unique and historically believable that I couldn't wait to pimp it.


	22. His Muse

**AN: This was an epically difficult chapter for me. RL has been a bitch and I had a hard time making it all come together. But that's what I have my amazing and wonderful beta Mollie for. Thank you, doll. You really do complete me. LOL**

**Melee: Thank you for your help on that wonderful pictease. My favorite by far. And for your fresh eyes after a very long process.**

**To everyone who has pimped this story, I cannot thank you enough.**

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. This storyline, however, is mine.**

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 20: His Muse

Have you ever had one of those moments where you just couldn't bring yourself to want to get out of bed in the morning? Yeah, I was having one of those. It may have had something to do with the fact that I had the love of my fucking life tucked in tightly to my side, lazily stroking my dick with her warm little hand. That's how I woke up, with her hand slipping down beneath the band of my boxers. For the first time in almost nine months, my morning wood was receiving some attention from someone other than me.

"I know you're awake," Bella said as she kissed my naked chest.

"If it means you're going to stop, then no, I'm not, I'm still fast asleep."

"Actually, I've been waiting for you to wake up so I can take care of this issue for you."

"Well, fuck, I'm wide awake then," I laughed covering her hand with mine and urging her to grip me tighter, which she did.

Less than ten minutes later I was mumbling profanities against Bella's lips as I came all over my stomach and her hand. I pulled at the sheet and offered it to Bella.

"Thanks," she laughed wiping her hand and then handing it back to me. "I guess it was time to change the sheets anyway."

I cleaned off my stomach and threw the sheet to the bottom of the bed.

"I could get used to this," I smiled, rolling on top of her and burying my face into the crook of her neck.

"I'm sure you could," Bella giggled, wiggling beneath me.

"Fuck, Bella, I wanna make you cum too," I growled attempting to pull her PJ pants down her hips a little.

"I want nothing more, but we have to get up," she said unconvincingly.

"I'm already up," I mumbled. "Again."

"You're always up, you horn dog."

"Only for you, baby," I grinned, thrusting my hips against her to emphasize my point. Shit, I was already pussy whipped and I wasn't even getting any pussy.

"As much as I..oh, that feels good," she moaned as I nibbled her earlobe. "As much as I'm enjoying this, it's six forty-five and I have to take a shower before Charlie wakes up."

"Mmmm, shower." The thought of a naked, wet, slippery Bella made my dick twitch. Being in the position I was, I couldn't even pretend that it didn't happen.

Bella wrapped her legs around me and scratched her fingernails up and down my back. I practically fucking purred in her hands.

"You're not making it any easier to let you go," I said in a slightly husky tone.

"I just want to hold you."

I lifted my head to look at her. She had the hint of shy smile tugging at her lips. I rolled onto my side and shifted us so that we were completely tangled together. I brushed my lips against her shoulder relishing in how soft her skin was. We lay like that for probably another fifteen minutes. I suppose that I could have gotten her off in that time, but she seemed to need the closeness more, so that is what I gave her. To be honest, I think I needed it just as much.

Finally dragging ourselves out of bed, Bella made her way into the shower while I got dressed and ran home to clean up myself. I bumped into Carlisle at the front door.

"Good morning, Edward." He didn't even bat an eyelash anymore when I was dashing from my girlfriend's apartment at seven in the morning.

"Morning, Dad. Off to work?"

"Yeah, I was supposed to be there about five minutes ago, but your mother held me up."

I grimaced. "Ew. I don't want to hear about that."

Carlisle lifted his eyebrow at me and it made me laugh. "Seriously, Dad, I beginning to think I should move out so I don't have to be exposed to all your smooching and shit."

"Oh yeah? Is that the only reason?" Carlisle asked knowingly.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Have a good one, pops."

"You too, son," he smirked.

I slipped quietly by my mother who was humming to herself and flitting about the kitchen and tried not to think about the reason why she was in such a good mood. Gross.

I jumped in the shower long enough to wash my hair and then was out and dressed in record time before heading back over to Bella's.

When I got there, I walked right in without even thinking about it. I had spent so much time there, that I couldn't help but feel like it was home. It was where I belonged, with Bella and my little man. Charlie was sitting at the table scowling and Bella was staring at her phone with an odd expression on her face.

"You okay?" I asked.

Bella jumped a little. "Shit, you scared me."

"Sorry, you don't look so good, what's the matter?"

She shoved her phone into her purse almost violently. "Nothing."

I didn't believe her, something was definitely up, but I didn't want to push her.

"What's the matter with you then?" I asked, ruffling Charlie's hair.

"Mommy won't let me have pancakes," Charlie grumbled.

"We don't have time for pancakes, Charlie. We have to leave for school in five minutes. Eat your cereal." Bella sounded stressed out, only furthering my suspicion that she was hiding something.

"How bout this. We can stop by and pick you up a muffin on the way."

"Edward!" Bella snapped.

I looked up at her and frowned. "What?"

"I've given him cereal and told him to eat it. We're not stopping anywhere or we'll be late."

"I want a muffin," Charlie whined.

Bella glared at me. "Thanks a lot. You think you can ask me first before offering him stuff."

I wasn't sure what had happened in the twenty minutes that had passed since I left her bed, but Bella had gone into bitch mode and I didn't like it.

"Stop yelling at me. It's not that big of a deal."

"I'm not yelling at you. And it is a big deal, I've already told him no."

"Muuuuuuuuffffffiiiinnn!" Charlie cried.

Bella huffed. "NO! We do not have time to stop for a muffin. Eat your cereal or you'll just have to go to school hungry."

Charlie burst into tears.

"Fuck, Bella, what the hell is the matter with you?" I said low enough so that Charlie couldn't hear me. I was new at this whole parenting thing, but I was pretty sure that she shouldn't be taking whatever was bothering her out on Charlie.

"What's the matter?" she retorted just as quietly. "This is what's the matter. You get the luxury of always being the fun parent. The one who gives him whatever he wants and always gets to play with him. I'm the one who always has to tell him no and then you come in here and tell him yes."

Fuck that. Something had definitely happened. I reached for her purse.

"What are you doing?"

"Finding out why you're in a bad mood all of the sudden."

She launched herself at me, trying to grab her purse. "No you're not, give it back."

I put the bag above my head and reached in, searching around for a bit before I pulled out her phone.

"Edward." I could hear the warning in her voice, but I ignored it. "Don't"

I flipped open her phone and discovered exactly why she had flipped like a switch. It was a message from Riley.

**I want to talk, Bella. Please, I'm so sorry.**

I looked up and met the absolutely furious gaze of my girlfriend. She snatched the phone out of my hand and walked out of the room and away from Charlie's eyes and ears. I followed her.

"What the hell is that fucker doing texting you?" I asked, trying not to yell.

"You know what, shut-up. You just completely disrespected me in there and I don't have to tell you anything."

I grabbed her arm and pulled her to me. She struggled for a moment, but stopped when she realized that it was pointless. There was no way I was letting her go.

"I love you, Bella," I said firmly. "I don't like it when you're upset and if you don't talk to me, then I'm going to have to find out what's wrong my own way."

"All you had to do was give me a few minutes to calm down and process things and I would have told you. You didn't have to go all asshole on me."

Her words were still laced with acid, but I could feel her body relaxing a little so I softened my grip.

"I'm sorry," I sighed, kissing her forehead. "In my defense though, I left here warm and satiated and came back to cold and bitchy."

I felt her arms slip around my waist and she pressed her cheek against my chest.

"I'm sorry too. I got frustrated. I didn't mean to take it out on you."

"I'm not the only one you took it out on, Bella," I sighed.

"I know."

She looked down at her watch and grumbled. "Shit, we're going to be late."

As she was helping Charlie into his coat, I heard her apologize. "I didn't mean to yell at you, baby. I was in a bad mood, but I shouldn't have yelled, okay?"

Charlie nodded.

"You're not always going to get what you want. Next time I'd like you to just eat what I give you."

"Okay, mommy."

As Charlie grabbed the railing to head down the steps, I put my arm around Bella's shoulders and kissed the tip of her nose before following behind him.

XXXXXX

"What did he want?" I asked about ten minutes into our drive. We were driving in my car because Bella's check engine light had come on and we didn't want to take the chance of something happening.

"You saw what he wanted. He wants to talk."

"Is that the first message he's sent?"

Bella's hesitation made a verbal confirmation completely unnecessary, but she gave it anyway.

"No. He's sent one every day for just over a week."

_What the fuck? Does that motherfucker have a death wish?_

"Do you want me to tell him to fuck off?" I said, hiding how irked I was by this news.

Bella scoffed. "If I wanted to tell him that, I'm perfectly capable of doing it myself, thank you."

"Then do it."

"I don't want to."

"For Christ's sake, Bella. Were you even in the same room when he was saying some of that shit to you? Cause I was. Why would you want anything to do with him?"

"Excuse me. Do you remember some of the shit you said to me? I forgave you, didn't I?"

_Ouch!_

I had no come back and I didn't want this conversation to get out of control. I clenched my jaw and stared at the road ahead of me. Bella turned around and I glanced at Charlie in the rear-view mirror. He was watching a movie on my iPad with the BOSE headphones on. It didn't appear that he had heard a thing.

"Look, Edward. I don't know what I'm going to do about Riley, okay? He's been my friend for a long time and I don't want to lose him completely, but I understand that right now, he can't be a part of our lives."

"I don't want that asswipe anywhere near my family, Bella. He crossed the line, both with you and in regards to my relationship with Charlie. I don't really give a shit what he has to say." I probably could have unleashed all the choice words I had about Riley, but it wouldn't have done any good. It just would have riled up the missus even more and I couldn't be one hundred percent sure that Charlie wouldn't have overheard.

I pulled up in front of the pre-school and Bella walked Charlie in. She let out an exhausted breath when she got back into the car. I grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles.

"I have a feeling this is just going to be a shitty day," she said, rubbing her eyes with her free hand.

"Don't think about it that way, baby. Why don't I come pick you up for lunch, I'll buy you a sandwich."

She smiled, sort of, and nodded. "That sounds like a very nice idea."

When I dropped her off, I gave her soft peck on the side of her mouth. "I'll pick you up at noon."

"Alright. I'll be ready."

XXXXX

Three and a half hours later, I pulled back up in front of Bella's office. She was waiting and almost took off the door to my car trying to get in.

"Shit, Bella."

"Just fucking drive," she grumbled.

Apparently she was still in a pissy mood.

"Can I talk without you biting my head off or should I just keep quiet?"

"You're fine. I just needed to get out of there," she said, leaning her head back against the seat.

"What happened?"

"Cammy's being a complete bitch this morning. She's antagonizing me every chance she gets."

_Cammy. There's that name again. Why the fuck does that sound so familiar?_

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, I don't. I want to forget about it for half an hour."

"Ooookay."

I tried to distract Bella by telling her about a patient that we had in who had accidentally shot himself in the right nut a few weeks ago while out target shooting. How the fuck that happened I'll never know. He was supposed to refrain from sexual activity for six weeks, but he said that he didn't realize that meant his girlfriend couldn't give him a blowjob. Whatever she did, his stitches got torn and he ignored it, causing the wound to get infected. It was fucking nasty and now he had to refrain from all sexual activity involving his dick for eight to twelve weeks. We pretty much had to list everything he wasn't allowed to do. Idiot.

In any case, all I succeeded in doing was grossing her out and she dropped the second half of her sandwich onto her napkin. Probably should have waited for that story until we weren't eating.

When we got back to her office I ran around to her door and opened it before she had a chance to. She stood up and I pressed her against the car, needing to feel her against me.

"What are you doing?" she asked with a slight smile.

"If I can't cheer you up by telling stories of other people's stupidity, then I'll just have to kiss the pissiness out of you."

Bella snorted, but didn't protest as I started molesting her with my mouth.

"Mmmm, you taste like pickles," I chuckled.

She hit my chest. "You shit. If you're concerned about my breath, then you should refrain from kissing me after I eat."

"I'm not concerned about your breath. I love the way you taste," I grinned and waggled my eyebrows at her." Her ears started to turn red, but she was still smiling.

I had succeeded in cheering her up. Score one for me.

She was full on laughing now. I glanced up over the roof of the car for just a split second and then had to do a double take. My eyes widened and my stomach dropped.

_Oh fuck!_

The girl staring at me from across the parking lot was familiar. Way too familiar. What was her name? Chrissy? Cassie? All of the sudden it was like a fucking freight train hit me going one hundred and ten miles per hour.

_Cammy. Motherfucker!_

She was approaching us with a smirk on her face. I was frantically searching for escape routes, but could see none. Even if I jumped in the car and left now, she would see that I was leaving Bella and I had no doubt that the bitch would tell her all about that night. I couldn't let her find out from someone else, especially not from Cammy herself.

"Hey, where are you?" Bella asked, pulling my face down to meet hers.

_Shit, why did this have to happen? Of all the fucking women I could have fucked that night it had to be the one making Bella's life a living hell already._

I let Bella kiss me, but my eyes were still scanning our surroundings. I heard a throat clear behind me and Bella huffed before pulling back and peering out from underneath my arm.

"What the fuck do you want?" Bella scowled. I still hadn't turned around. I was being a total chicken shit, but I couldn't help it. I felt like a deer caught in the headlights.

"I just came to say hello to Edward. I didn't realize he had company," Cammy said in a very false sweet voice. I looked down at Bella and saw confusion in her eyes. "You left so quickly the other morning, I didn't ever really get a chance to thank you properly," she purred.

I was still pressed up against Bella and I felt her body completely tense up. I closed my eyes willing it all to be just a fucking nightmare, but the moment I felt her start to shake, I knew it wasn't.

"Please, Edward," she begged. Please tell me you didn't."

I couldn't speak. Why? Because if I did, I would have to admit to her that I had done exactly what she feared. Bella slipped out from under me and took a few steps away.

"Oh, yes he did," Cammy laughed. "Jesus Fucking Christ, Bella. When I asked you if your man had gotten tired of you and looked for pussy elsewhere, I was kind of just trying to get a rise out of you. I had no idea that I hit the nail on the head. Seriously though, if you want Luke so bad, I'm sure we can work out a trade?"

_What?_

Now it was my turn to be confused.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I asked angrily.

"Oh, she didn't tell you? I caught little miss perfect here trying to seduce my boyfriend, our boss, the other day."

I looked over at Bella a little shocked. This new revelation completely shoved the fact that it was me who was in the hot seat to the back of my mind.

"Shut the fuck up, Cammy," she screeched. "I wasn't doing anything of the sort."

"Oh please. You were practically shoving your tits in his face."

"I was not. I caught him staring down my shirt and I got on his case about it."

"He was doing what?" I barked.

Bella unleashed a fiery glare that almost made me piss myself. I was in a shitload of trouble.

"I should go back in, I really don't want to be late," Cammy sneered. "It was so good to see you again, Edward. If you ever want to play again, you know where to find me."

"Fuck you!" I retorted. "I wouldn't have touched you with a ten foot pole if I had been sober."

"Sure, loverboy, you keep telling her that."

Cammy turned and sauntered into the building swaying her hips as if that would somehow make her sexy. Fucking skank.

When I turned back to Bella her head was hanging, her eyes on the ground.

"Why didn't you tell me about Luke?"

"What?" I heard the increase in octave, but like the idiot I was, I didn't heed the warning.

"That fucker is sexually harassing you and you didn't think I'd want to know about it. What else has been going on that you haven't told me about?"

"Are you fucking kidding me? You're trying to turn this shit around on me?"

_Oh fuck, pedal backwards, asshole. FAST._

I grabbed her shoulders, trying to pull her to me. I wanted her to calm down. I needed to know that we were okay. I needed her to tell me that she loved me.

"Get off me," she snapped.

"Bella, I..."

"Edward. I need you to let. me. go."

I did as she asked, slowly letting my hand trail down her arm.

"When?" she asked.

Oh shit! I was pretty sure that even though it was before we got together that the date was going to piss her the fuck off.

I opened my mouth to try and answer her, but I just shook my head. I could see her eyes glossing over with un-shed tears.

"A while ago."

"That's not a fucking answer. When did you fuck her?"

"July," I mumbled, hanging my head a little, but keeping my eyes trained on her.

"July?" I watched her face as she thought about my answer and the moment that it registered, the color completely drained.

She blinked slowly and a a tear trickled from the corner of her eye and down her cheek. She turned her head away from me and wiped the tear away with her thumb as she sniffled.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I don't know what happened."

"She said the other morning? What did she mean the other morning?"

"She's fucking lying. The one and only time was right after I got back."

"The night you found out about Charlie?"

I nodded. "I don't even remember it, Bella. I was upset and I did what I had always done, I drank myself into oblivion. I didn't even remember her name. It wasn't until just now that I put two and two together."

Bella was gnawing on her lip so hard I could see the skin peeling away with every pass of her teeth.

"Were you safe?"

I swallowed thickly. "I think so."

Her eyes widened incredulously. "You _think_ so?"

"I...I don't know. She said we were, but I was too fucked up."

_Shit, this can't be happening. I am so fucking screwed._

Bella's eyes were swimming in tears. Seeing her like that was ripping my heart to shreds.

"Bella, please," I pleaded, almost on the verge of tears myself. "We've come so far since then. I know it was stupid, but I am a different person. I can't lose you over something like this. I know I should have told you, but I forgot."

She laughed, but there was no humor behind it. "You forgot? How do you forget fucking somebody? You know what, don't answer that."

A look that I didn't understand crossed her face.

"I have to go back to work and so do you," she sighed. "We can talk about this later."

I reached out to her, but she shook her head. "Not right now, Edward, please? I'll see you in a few hours."

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you too," she said, as she began to walk away from me. She looked so defeated, her words pained. There was no way that I was going to let this ruin us. She was my life and I would fight for her as long as I had to.

BPOV

I watched as Edward got into his car. He glanced up and gave a sad smile before he turned on the ignition and drove away. I was so completely mindfucked by what had just happened I didn't even see what was waiting for me just inside our office door.

"Awww, did the lovebirds have a little fight?" Cammy's slimy voice tisked as I walked past her.

I turned abruptly. "You stupid fucking cow. Mind your own business."

"Oh, come on. It's not my fault that he came to me to satisfy his needs."

"You don't know what you're talking about," I seethed. It was taking everything I had not to beat the shit out of her, but I knew that I would probably lose my job if I did.

"I know that your Edward has a nipple piercing that makes him fucking horny as hell. I know that he has a thick, long, cock and virtually no need for recovery time. I know what his cum tastes like and I know exactly what he sounds like when he's shouting my name in ecstasy."

"Yeah, well from what I understand you know that kind of information about a lot of guys."

Her face dropped a little. "Whatever. The fact is that you obviously can't satisfy him."

I knew that I didn't owe her an explanation of what Edward and I were, but I needed to wipe that smug look off her face. She thought that he had cheated on me with her and she loved the idea.

"You know what? Whoever or whatever Edward decided to do before we got together isn't really an issue for me, but I wouldn't go around bragging it. It must really chap your ass that you weren't memorable enough for him to even give you a second thought."

She frowned at me. "Don't fucking lie just to make yourself feel better, Bella. It's pathetic. I'm not stupid. How old is your kid? Three, four? Has he been straying the entire time or just for the past few months?"

"Are you seriously calling _me_ pathetic? That's fucking rich. It doesn't fucking matter. Whatever he did with you, he was free to do. We weren't together then."

"Oh, so you were just a slut then? You got yourself knocked up by some guy and roped him into a relationship? Nice, Bella."

"You are certainly not in a position to be accusing anyone of being a slut," I laughed humorlessly. I wanted to tell her I knew all about all the men she had bedded and her fucked up box of souvenirs, but I couldn't, not just yet. I didn't know what she would do with them if she knew that Luke had told me and if Edward had fucked her, it was likely that she had a picture of him. The thought made me sick, but I had to keep it to myself.

"You are such a bitch," she sneered.

I ignored her and went to sit down at my desk. I had taken her down a notch and I wasn't about to engage her in any more teenage bullshit.

Luke came back from lunch about ten minutes later. He noticed the tension between Cammy and I, but didn't say anything. He simply quirked his eyebrow in question. I waved him off and we spent the rest of the afternoon in near silence, only talking when absolutely necessary.

XXXXXX

Edward was waiting for me at three-twenty that afternoon.

"Hi," he greeted cautiously.

"Hi." I wasn't ready to talk about anything yet, plus we had to pick up Charlie, so I didn't say anything more.

The ride home was almost painful. I put Edward's XM on the kids' music channel for Charlie, but it didn't help much. I could see Edward glancing at me out of the corner of his eye every couple of minutes.

"Please, stop. We'll talk after he goes to bed," I said quietly so that only Edward could hear me.

"Just tell me we're okay," he said just as quietly.

"Edward, the last thing you want to do while I'm still upset is ask me to answer a question like that."

I had calmed down considerably over the last few hours, but it still hurt to think that he had sought out sex with a random slut in response to finding out that I had given birth to his child. Regardless of what Cammy may or may not have done to increase his state of intoxication, I had no doubt that he would have fucked her.

I tried to shake the thoughts from my head, because I knew that he wasn't that person anymore, but it was hard. I knew that I'd get over it, I didn't have a choice. I loved him too much. And that's what I needed to focus on.

XXXXXXX

"Charlie, you need to take a bath tonight and get all of your stuff together for tomorrow." I said sitting down on the sofa after cleaning up the night's dinner.

"Where am I going?"

"Gramma Esme and Papa Carlisle want to take you to the zoo in Seattle."

"The one with da monkeys?"

I smiled. Of course he would remember the monkeys. "Yes, baby, the one with the monkeys. And the elephants and zebras too."

Charlie's eyes widened with excitement and he inhaled before letting out a squeak.

"Are you coming too?" He asked, bouncing up and down.

"No, sweetie," I said pulling him into my lap. "Daddy and I are going to stay home. This is a special treat just for you."

Charlie furrowed his brow and bit down on his lip. I heard Edward chuckle and I looked up at him.

"Sorry," he mouthed.

"What are _you_ gonna do?" Charlie finally asked.

_Oh, that's a good question, sweet baby boy. What are we going to do?_

I knew what the plan had been. Edward and I had both been looking forward to this time alone since the moment we knew it was going to happen, but I didn't know anymore. Cammy's words of how familiar she was with Edward echoed in my head and stabbed at my heart.

"We're going to do some boring grown-up stuff and miss you," I provided.

Charlie wrinkled up his nose, but it turned into a squeal as Edward swooped him up from behind.

"Let's go, buddy, time to clean that bellybutton out."

"My beweybutton's not dirty," I heard Charlie giggle just before the water for the tub turned on.

I continued to sit on the sofa running through my thoughts. I needed to sort them all out and figure out what I was going to say to him. Conversations such as these always go so much better when there's some kind of outline. That's exactly why I hadn't called Riley back yet. He had been texting me daily for over a week and I had no idea how to respond to him. I had my family to focus on and I knew that Edward wouldn't just suddenly be okay with Riley returning to our lives. And I wasn't even sure if that's what I wanted. I should have known that sex would make things difficult if not impossible, but hindsight is always 20/20. Charlie had asked about him a few times and I just explained that Riley was really busy with school.

After Edward bathed Charlie and got him ready for bed, I moved in for the tuck-in. I read him _The Little Engine That Could_, his new favorite book that had accompanied his emerging obsession with trains, and sang to him as his eyes grew heavy.

I could feel Edward's gaze on my back, but he turned and left the room just as I stood up to leave. My footsteps felt heavy as I went to join him, but if we wanted to move past this, we needed to talk.

He was sitting down at the kitchen table when I reached him. I sat down across from him and stared at my hands, picking at my fingernails.

"Bella, I know you're mad at me..." his voice suddenly broke through the silence.

"I'm not mad at you."

"You're not?"

"No. I'm not."

"Then why are you..."

"I said I wasn't mad at _you_, Edward. I didn't say I wasn't upset."

Edward looked at me in confusion.

I swallowed and pursed my lips together before speaking. "I'm upset at the situation. Like I told Cammy, we weren't together and you had every right to do...whatever, with whomever, you wanted. But that doesn't make the knowledge that you were with her any easier."

"Why would you even go there with her. It's none of her fucking business."

"Because I'm fucking human, Edward," I snapped. "She was standing there with this...this smile on her face thinking that you strayed from what I had to offer to indulge in something better with her."

"But you know that's not true," he protested.

"Of course I do, but she didn't. I couldn't sit there with her every time we worked together and let her gloat. Do you know how immensely painful it is to knowing that I'm your girlfriend and yet she knows your body better than I do? "

Edward reached across the table and grabbed my hand. "No, Bella, she doesn't. I told you I don't remember what happened with her, but I do know that I've already given you more of myself than I've given anyone else. The night that you told me about Charlie. I couldn't come to terms with what was happening. I had all these emotions flooding my system. More emotion than I had felt in years. The second I woke up I knew that I had made a mistake."

My eyes narrowed. "You don't remember anything?"

I had already suspected that something was off after the first time he said that in the parking lot. Luke had said that some of the guys in the pictures looked drugged. Working as a bartender, Cammy would have the perfect opportunity to spike his drink, or any other guy she wanted. But why?

Edward shook his head. "No. I remember her at the bar and I remember waking up at her place, but I don't remember going home with her and I don't remember anything that we did. Fuck, maybe we didn't even have sex. Maybe she's just..."

He stopped talking, probably because of the look that I was giving him.

"What?"

"How much did you have to drink?"

"I don't know, a lot."

"Enough to make you black out completely?"

I could see him thinking. "I don't remember, Bella. Why?"

I was trying to decide if I should tell him about what Luke had said about Cammy's souvenir box.

_Honesty Bella._

"Luke and Cammy used to date," I started to explain. "A few months ago, he found a box of pictures in her closet."

Edward's face suddenly went white.

I nodded. "The pictures were of men, in her bed. Luke said they were all naked and that they looked to either be completely passed out or drugged."

"Fuck," he gasped. "Did she have one of...of me?"

"I don't know. Luke doesn't know you so if there was, he wouldn't have recognized you."

"You think she drugged me?"

I shrugged. "We'll probably never know."

"Why the fuck would she keep something like that?"

"She told Luke they were both souvenirs and insurance policies."

Edward looked like I had just slapped him. "For what?" His voice had increased an octave and he looked panicked.

"She's fucked up, Edward. I don't know what she's doing. We can speculate all we want to."

We both had to take in deep breaths, but Edward kept a firm hold on my hand.

"You said you think you were safe?"

"She said we were. There was ah...evidence that we were. I got fully tested afterwards."

I stared at Edward for a moment. He had such a distraught expression on his face and I just wanted to pull him to me.

Edward stood up and helped me to my feet. He towered over me.

"Do you want me to go?" he asked sadly.

I looked up at him. The fear in his eyes that I was going to walk away from him was extremely evident. I lifted my hand to his jaw and he bent down, meeting me in a slow and sensual kiss.

"I love you," I whispered.

"You forgive me then?" he said as his lips rested against my temple and his arms slid over my shoulders.

"There's nothing to forgive. This is yet another bump in the road, right? We've survived a shitload more than this already. If I let this destroy us, then she wins. I'm not about to let that bitch win. You're mine, Edward Cullen, and I don't intend on ever letting you go."

The tension that he was holding in his shoulders relaxed and he squeezed me tighter and I'm fairly certain I heard him mumble what sounded like "Completely yours," against my skin.

"Do you want to come for breakfast in the morning?" he asked, changing the subject.

I nodded. "We'll be over first thing."

I walked Edward to the door. I didn't necessarily want him to leave, but I thought that maybe it was best. With our emotions as chaotic as ours had been all day, I couldn't guarantee that we'd be able to control ourselves and I knew that Edward was wanting to do things the right way.

"Do you still want alone time with me tomorrow?" he asked almost shyly.

I couldn't help but laugh. "Is that what you're worried about?"

He looked at me sheepishly. "No. Yes. I don't know what the right answer is."

_My poor confused man._

I grabbed his collar and yanked him to me. "Yes, Edward, I still want to spend tomorrow with you. All alone, by ourselves."

"Naked?" he asked pressing his lips against my chin.

There was mischief in his eyes, but behind it was still a little bit of concern, maybe that I had changed my mind. I needed to put his thoughts at ease.

"Possibly," I replied coyly.

He kissed a line up my jaw until his mouth was at my ear. "I love you, more than anything, never forget that."

"I won't," I whispered.

Edward pulled away and I listened to his heavy footsteps make their way down the steps before I shut the door.

I needed to spend the next few hours getting my head on straight; allowing myself to get past who he used to be. He had proven to me beyond a doubt that he belonged to me and Charlie. And come tomorrow, I would make sure that he had no doubt, that I belonged to him.

EPOV

_Fuck my life._

That Cammy bitch was the worst mistake of my life, well her and the four fucking years I wasted with Tanya, but knowing that it was possible that she fucking drugged me, made me see red. Like Bella said, we'd probably never know. I drank a lot that night, but enough to make me completely forget where I was and everything that had happened. What the fuck was she up to?

Thank fuck Bella wasn't mad at me. I briefly wondered, however, if the anger would have been better than the hurt and disappointment that was written all over her beautiful face. God, I was the biggest dipshit. I even managed to get myself banned from her bed for the night. I almost got down on my knees and begged her to let me stay with her, but I understood that she needed some time. Didn't make the ache for her lessen any, but what could I do? When I was leaving, I just couldn't help myself. I had to ask her about our alone time. I had already made a plan that would encapsulate the intensity of my feelings for her, hopefully ending in us making love the entire night. I was petrified she would no longer want me, but she did. Thank fucking God, she did.

When I woke in the morning, I was fucking cold...and lonely. One night, one fucking night in her bed and I wanted to spend the rest of my life there. The thought of how I had woken up just one day prior made my acutely aware that I would be taking care of my own morning issue by myself again. I hadn't even opened my eyes yet, but I shoved my hands into my flannel pajama pants and gripped myself tightly. I didn't even hear the door when it opened.

"Am I interrupting?" Bella's voice asked, making me practically jump out of my skin.

She was standing in the doorway.

"Fuck, baby, no. I, uh, well, you know how it is in the morning. Come on in, you want to do it for me?"

I meant it as a joke, but the look on Bella's face told me she hadn't actually heard me.

"I haven't been in here in a long time," she said, biting her lip.

It only took me a second to figure out why she looked almost pained at the idea of coming into my bedroom. I shot out of bed, pitching a full tent, and went to her, wrapping my arms around her.

"Jesus, Edward," she laughed as my hard-on poked her in the navel.

"I'm sorry," I groaned.

"It's fine, like you said, I know how it is for you in the morning."

"That's not what I was apologizing for."

"Oh."

"I don't want you to be afraid of my bedroom."

"I'm not afraid of it. It just brings back a lot of memories." I could hear a slight tremble in her voice, but she tried to play it off. "You're mom has breakfast ready."

"Oh, okay. I'll be down in a minute."

She started to leave, but I grabbed her and pulled her back to me, wrapping her up in my arms.

"Good morning, gorgeous girl."

I felt her smile against my chest. "Good morning, horny boy," she laughed.

I playfully pushed her out the door and smacked her ass.

I joined them downstairs after a quick shower and a shave. I didn't indulge in any self pleasure. I needed a fucking release, but I would wait until it was Bella who gave it to me.

"What are you doing today?" I asked Alice. I saw Jasper roll his eyes next to her and I snorted.

Alice glared at him, obviously already knowing how he felt on the subject, whatever it may be.

"We're going house hunting," Alice announced.

"Really?" Mom asked.

"Yes. I figure, we're adults and it's time to move out from under our parents roof."

Jasper mumbled something under his breath and I saw him jerk as though he had been kicked under the table.

"Well, that's wonderful news. I mean, we'll miss you of course, but you're not planning on moving far, are you?"

"No, Mom, of course not. It wouldn't make any sense to go far with the firm and Jasper's job and all."

When breakfast was over, Alice made her way out of the kitchen and I stayed behind, helping Jasper clean up.

"What was that all about?"

"Do you know what kind of houses she's looking at?" Jasper scoffed.

I chuckled. "I can imagine."

"The only houses she's willing to even consider are over half a million dollars. We can't afford a house like that on our salaries. We're making good money, but not that good."

"She's got a trust fund, Jazz," I supplied.

"I know that, but shit, Edward, we're twenty three years old, why on earth would we need a huge expensive house right now?"

"Maybe she wants to fill it with babies," I snickered.

Jasper flashed me a look that shut me up pretty quickly.

"Can you keep a secret, man?" he said in a hushed tone.

"From who? If you're asking me to keep it from Bella, then no, I can't."

"I trust Bella. Can you keep it from Alice?"

"Of course."

"I asked your dad last week if I could marry her."

"Dude, seriously? That's fucking awesome. I'm assuming he said yes."

Jasper grinned. "Of course he did."

"When are you going to do it?"

"I don't know. I've got the ring and if I don't do it soon, she's going to find the fucker."

"Well, let me know if there's anything I can do," I offered.

"Thanks, Edward," he said slapping me on the back.

XXXXXXX

A little while later, Bella and I stood in the driveway as my parents and Charlie drove away. I moved myself directly behind her and slipped my arms around her waist.

"How are we this morning?" I asked brushing my lips against the shell of her ear.

She tilted her head up and looked up at me. "We...are perfect."

"Really?" I asked, my voice cracking. I cleared my throat. "Really?" I tried again.

Bella laughed and turned in my arms. "Yes, really." Her hand came up and stroked my freshly shaved jaw. Her smile faded, and she gazed into my eyes longingly. "You are not the same person that you were even a few months ago, Edward. I know that. I trust you completely, with our son, and with my heart."

I felt a wave of emotion hit me square in the chest at her words. There was a finality in her voice that assured me of her conviction. She was mine and I was hers and nothing would ever come between us again. I kissed her softly, careful not to take it too far, considering we were still in the middle of the driveway in broad daylight.

"So what are we doing today?" she sighed as I pulled away from her.

"I've got plans for you. I want to show you something."

Bella wiggled her eyebrows at me. "Well, that sounds promising," she teased.

I shook my head. "Damn it, woman. Go get your shit, and meet me back out here in five minutes."

She winked at me before wandering nonchalantly away towards her apartment.

I went back inside to make the phone call, letting our hostess know that we were on our way.

XXXXX

"Where are we going?"

"I'm not telling."

"Well, that's not fair."

"It's a surprise. If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise anymore now would it?"

Bella huffed. "Fine." I let out a low chuckle. Even annoyed she was too fucking cute.

I drove South on the 101 until just before Boagchiel State Park. I turned on an old dirt road that looked like it disappeared into the forest, but it just kept going. Just as Bella was about to lose her patience the trees cleared and a gigantic house appeared in front of us.

"What is this place?" Bella gasped.

"I used to come here a lot when I needed to think," I told her.

"But, what is it."

"This is Mrs. Jane's house."

Bella looked at me skeptically. "Who's Mrs. Jane?"

"Come with me," I said climbing out of the car.

Bella held my hand tightly as we approached the front door to the house. It was an old English manor house that didn't appear as though it belonged in these parts. The driveway circular and was covered in pea gravel with a fountain in the middle. The fountain didn't appear to be working anymore, but it was still a magnificent three-tiered bowl fountain made of limestone.

There was ivy growing up trellises and drain pipes all over the house and a heavy mahogany door was placed right in the center. I used the brass knocker and waited.

Bella wasn't quite sure. She was tugging nervously at her lip with her free hand.

The door opened and I couldn't help, but grin.

"Edward, my dear boy, get in here, it has been too long?" I was enveloped into the warmest of hugs and had to let go of Bella as the tiny little woman with the thick English accent yanked me forward.

"I was at school, Mrs. Jane. You know that."

"Of course you were. Have you become a handsome doctor like your father yet?"

I laughed. "Not yet, Mrs. Jane. I still have to go to medical school."

It was about at that point that the little old woman noticed Bella.

"Oh," she squeaked, her eyes widening. "I'm so sorry, dear. I'm hogging this boy. I just haven't seen him in so long."

"It's okay," Bella said softly.

"It most certainly is not. Edward, introduce me to this lovely young lady already."

"Bella, this is Mrs. Althea Jane, lady of the manor," I joked as Mrs. Jane scowled at me. "Mrs. Jane, this is my Bella."

"_Your_ Bella?"

I nodded with a grin.

"Well, she must be something if you're bringing her to your safe spot, hmmm? You've never brought anyone here before."

Bella looked at me curiously.

"You take her through, dear and I'll make us some tea, yes?"

"Thank you," I said kissing her on the cheek.

"Your safe spot?" Bella asked as I grabbed onto her hand.

"I'll show you."

I led her past the grand staircase and through a hallway that led to the back of the house. A pair of heavy French doors stood between us and one of my most favorite spots in the world. I couldn't believe I hadn't been back here in so long. It should have been the place I came when I found out about Charlie. It would have been a much healthier way of coping with the shock. I opened them up and Bella gasped.

"Oh my God! This is...this is..."

"I know," I sighed.

We were staring at an enormous glass conservatory. The ceiling was domed looking out on the wilderness surrounding us, but also opening up to the sky above. On clear nights, you could see the stars shining so brightly you'd think they were close enough to touch. All around us were plants. Greenery and brightly colored flowers. It was kind of like a tropical greenhouse with virtually any type of flower you could imagine. I started walking and Bella followed.

"When I was in high school, Carlisle wanted me to do some volunteer work. He thought it would be good for me. The summer before Junior year, I was at the hospital when Mr. Henry Jane was brought in. He was in full cardiac arrest and never recovered. Carlisle was worried about Althea. They had moved out here twenty years ago from Dorchester, England. Well, I guess twenty-five years ago now. They had this house built and they lived here all by themselves. All their family was still back in England. He had me drive her home that night. She invited me in for tea, and she was so sweet, I just couldn't refuse. She brought me into this room and I fell in love."

"I can see why," Bella breathed.

"You haven't seen the best part."

I led Bella through the 'garden' as Mrs. Jane liked to call it, and towards my own personal paradise. I could tell the moment that she spotted it. She stopped dead in her tracks and her jaw dropped.

There was another set of glass doors that you almost couldn't see. They were nearly invisible. On the other side of them was a 1905 Louis XV Steinway piano. It was made of African mahogany and had been fully restored.

I opened the doors and closed them quickly once we were inside. Whereas the air in the main conservatory was humid and warm, the air in the much smaller piano room was balanced. Both rooms were climate controlled.

"Needless to say that when she showed me this room, I nearly shit myself," I laughed. "I started coming back a couple times a week. I would play for her while she tended to her plants. It became the only place that I was truly happy and relaxed."

I opened up the door when I saw Mrs. Jane approaching with the tea tray.

"This is stunning," Bella said as the old woman set the tray down on a side table.

"Well, dear. I told my Henry that if he was going to move me all the way across the world and away from my family, he was going to have to build me a conservatory. So he did."

"_Your_ Henry?" I teased.

"Yes, boy, _my_ Henry. When you are married as long as that man and I were, you earn the right to ownership."

I laughed. "Mrs. Jane, I have something to tell you."

She looked between Bella and I and clapped her hands together. "Oh, are you getting married sweet boy?"

"No, Mrs. Jane, not yet anyway," I said winking at Bella. "But we do have some other news."

She put her wrinkled old hands on her hips. "Well, out with it then."

I could feel butterflies in my stomach. I had told tons of people about Charlie and yet, this woman standing in front of me had the ability to make me feel like a little boy. I was extremely nervous.

"Um, well, I, Bella and I have a little boy."

She opened her mouth and then closed it again. I continued.

"His name is Charlie. He's three years old and he's absolutely amazing."

I lifted Bella's hand and grazed my lips against her knuckles.

Mrs. Jane's eyes widened. "Well I...Edward, you've been writing to me since you left for school and you never once thought to mention that you had a son?"

I looked over at Bella. I hadn't really thought about this part of the conversation.

"Um..."

"That's my fault," Bella said, taking the tea that she was being offered.

"How is that your fault, dear?" Mrs. Jane asked, sipping her own cup.

"I...I didn't tell him about Charlie until a few months ago."

Mrs. Jane choked.

"It's a complicated story, Mrs. Jane," I explained. "One that we have had to come to terms with."

"It must be a very complicated story indeed," she said in a matter of fact tone.

"I fell in love with Bella a long time ago," I admitted, slipping my arm around my waist.

The room was quiet as Mrs. Jane appeared to study the both of us.

"She's your muse?" she asked abruptly.

I froze, suddenly remembering an intensely private discussion I had had with the old woman shortly before graduation.

"Edward Anthony Cullen, _this_ is the girl you wrote for all those years ago?"

Bella looked up at me in surprise. "You wrote for me?"

"I, uh...yeah, kind of."

Mrs. Jane grinned like a Cheshire cat. "Oh, dear, you've had this boy wrapped around your finger for a very long time."

I cleared my throat. Not that Bella didn't already know how I felt back then, but Mrs. Jane had seen me at a particularly vulnerable moment, completely at the mercy of the music that poured from my soul.

"So, um, Charlie," I said, trying to re-direct the conversation. "He's an amazing kid Mrs. Jane."

"I'm sure he is," she said softly. "I'd love to meet him."

We spent the morning in the conservatory talking about Charlie and school. Mrs. Jane asked Bella questions about herself and regaled us with stories about her life, growing up in England when World War II broke out. She was just a little girl, but she seemed to remember things so clearly. She told us about her four children and twelve grandchildren and even her seven great-grandchildren. The entire family was supposed to be coming over for Christmas this year.

She offered to make us lunch and we gladly accepted as long as we were allowed to help. Afterwards, she left us alone while she tended to her 'garden'. I sat down at the piano and began to play. I smiled. It was perfectly in tune as it always had been. Bella sat next to me on the bench and leaned her head against my shoulder.

"This place is perfect."

"I know. I've always loved it here."

"Why haven't you been back since?"

"I don't know."

I wish I had more of an answer than that, but I didn't.

It was three o'clock before we left Mrs. Jane's house with a promise to come back soon with Charlie. By that point, I was so relaxed I almost forgot what was planned for the rest of the evening. Almost.

"I want Chinese food," Bella said rubbing her stomach after it had growled loudly.

"You're hungry already?"

"Yes."

I handed her my iPhone. "A Taste of the Orient's number is programmed in there. Call it in and we'll pick it up on the way home."

By the time we got home with food in hand it was almost five. Jasper's truck was still gone, meaning that they were probably still out house hunting. Poor fucker.

I followed Bella up the stairs and into her apartment. We sat down on the sofa, setting the Styrofoam containers on the coffee table and grabbing our chopsticks. She took a few bites and then looked up at me.

"Thank you for sharing Mrs. Jane with me," she smiled.

"It was my pleasure, I knew you'd like it there."

"I really did. It was like a little vacation. I feel so relaxed."

"I'm glad. I wanted to take you to the place that served as my sanctuary. A place where I poured my heart out on a regular basis. Mrs. Jane was always there for me with a cup of tea and a willing ear."

"She's seems like such a sweet woman."

"Yes, she is." I smiled as the memories of her advice on everything from dating to convincing my parents to buy me car came back to me. Obviously I ignored her dating advice. Yes, another sign that I was a complete and total idiot.

"What did she mean, I'm your muse? Bella asked, pulling me from the past.

I coughed on the noodle that had just slid down my throat and looked up at Bella.

"You already know how I felt about you," I said softly.

"She said you wrote for me." Bella set down her plate and moved closer to me. I did the same, opening my arms as she climbed into my lap, placing her knees on either side of my thighs, effectively straddling me.

"I did. I wrote for you a lot." I placed an open mouth kiss on her throat and slid my hands down to rest on her hips.

"What did you write?" Bella asked, reaching behind my head and toying with the hair at the nape of my neck.

"I don't remember," I fibbed, dragging the tip of my nose up her jugular and nipping at her jaw.

"Why don't I believe you?" she breathed and then let out a gentle moan as I scraped my teeth across her earlobe and then sucked it into my mouth.

"Because you're a very smart woman," I smirked, pulling back to look at her.

Her eyes were heavy with desire and I pulled her towards me. "I wrote about us, in music," I whispered against her mouth, not quite touching it with my own. "I wrote about the innocence of my love for you." I slid my hand up her spine. Her back arched, pushing her perfect breasts against my chest. "I wrote about the hope that you would come to me." I slid my other hand up her ribcage, feeling her breaths as she began to pant. "I wrote about my need to make you mine and the anger and frustration of not knowing how to do it." I could feel her heartbeat beating furiously matching the rhythm of my own.

"And how did it end?" she gasped.

"It hasn't." I captured her mouth in a searing kiss. Our lips molded to each other and I ran my tongue over her bottom lip, begging for entrance. She whimpered against me and opened up, allowing me to take what I needed and give her everything I had.

We hadn't even started moving our bodies, but the heat between us was overpowering.

_Fuck, I need her._

"Bella, I can't wait any longer, please,"I begged. "I am so fucking ready."

She shook her head and I didn't wait for a verbal response. I swooped her up and carried her into the bedroom, not even bothering to shut the door. I set her down on the floor and her hands were immediately on me. Her nails scraped against the skin of my abs and rested on my hips. She took a deep breath and lifted her arms above her head. I slowly peeled the shirt from her body. As much as I wanted the woman naked, I wanted to savor this moment. Never again would we have this moment.

I tossed the shirt onto the floor and reached for her. As I cradled her head, I leaned in, taking her plump lower lip and sucking on it gently. I refused to break eye contact with her as I let my hands move over her neck, across her shoulders, and down her arms. Gripping one of her hands in mine, I let the other one trail up her hip, my thumb brushing against her stomach and ribcage before landing just below her breast. Then I let it wrap around her back and danced my fingertips up and down her spine.

I felt her shiver just before her body broke out in goose bumps.

"Are you cold?" I asked pulling my mouth away from her lips and towards her neck again. I loved the feel of her pulse against my mouth.

"No," she breathed. "I just...I need to feel you. I need you closer; on me, inside of me."

Never in my life, had I heard words so sexy, so sensual. Words that could set me on fire. Bella was made for me.

I let go of her hand and let her pull my shirt up over my head. There was a slight chill to the air, but the moment she pressed herself against me, I was enveloped in her warmth and I craved more.

My hands made their way back around the front and I snapped open the button to her jeans. I pulled them over her hips and kneeled on the floor to slide them down her gorgeous legs. I kept my eyes trained on her face to make sure that this is what she wanted. I knew that she desired me, she didn't hide that, but I needed to make amends, I needed to make it right. This was the first time I had ever made love to a woman, any woman. The fact that it was Bella that I was giving myself to, only made the experience that much more intense. She stepped out of her pants and kicked them away quickly just as I ran my hands all the way back up, caressing her calves and the backs of her thighs and reveling in the silkiness of her skin, before cupping her ass.

I was face to face with her lace covered center. I could smell her arousal and I licked my lips in anticipation. I was hungry for what only she could give me. I kneaded her backside and pressed my nose, directly against the soft fabric covering her warmth.

"Fuck you smell good."

She was wearing a simple pair of white lace boy shorts, but I found them exceptionally erotic.

I stuck my tongue out, licking at her; wanting to taste her, to drink from her. But it wasn't enough. I needed more.

Slipping my fingers into the back of her panties, I pulled them down the same way I had her jeans without removing my gaze from her gorgeous pussy. When I finally did glance up, her pupils were dilated and her chest heaving. She was waiting for me. She loved my sorry, fucked up ass despite all the mistakes that I had made and I was going to show her exactly how much she meant to me. I lifted her right leg up over my shoulder and drove my tongue into her listening to her cry out as she grabbed at my hair.

_Fuck, I think I've just died and gone to heaven._

"Ugh, Edward."

I used my thumb to pull back on the hood of her clit, exposing the swollen flesh and flicked my tongue against it rapidly. She responded by bucking her hips into my face almost violently. This was motherfucking heaven, it had to be; my face between Bella's legs, my tongue buried in her pussy.

Without warning she gripped my hair tightly, almost ripping it out by the roots and let out a wail as I tasted liquid gold.

"Oh shit," she gasped. "That was fucking incredible."

"You want me to do it again," I grinned, wiping my chin with the back of my hand.

"Yes, I do, but right now, I need you to come up here."

I did as she asked and stood up. She immediately pushed her tongue into my mouth effectively tasting herself.

_Holy Jesus, please don't let me blow my load before I have a chance to get inside of her._

"You taste good, don't you?" I mumbled against her mouth.

I heard her giggle and then her hands were on my button.

"Take these off, please."

The jeans I was wearing were loose enough, all she had to do is push them down a little and they dropped to the floor. I kicked them off to join the pile of clothes and then swiftly pulled off my boxers.

Bella squeaked as my erection sprang free. I smirked and followed her as she scooted up the bed.

Using my teeth I slipped first one strap of her bra and then the other off of her shoulder and down her arms. With a quick flick of the wrist, the whole thing fell away, revealing to me those beautiful mounds with their perfect little peaks.

I stared down at the gorgeous woman beneath me and took in a very choppy breath. She was everything at that moment; the little girl who I had my first crush on, the teenage girl whom I desired, the innocent that I destroyed, the woman who bore my child, the one I hated and feared. She was the saint who had forgiven me and now she was the only person I ever wanted to love entirely; the one I was ready to give my soul to.

" Edward?" she called out to me, tilting her head to the side and caressing my cheek with her thumb. A look flashed in her eyes. One that told me that she understood how much what we were about to do would change our lives.

I bent my head and breathed hot air across her neck before lowering myself to my elbows and taking her head between my palms.

"I love you," I whispered, ghosting my lips over hers.

She smiled up at me.

"I love you too."

"I want to do very, very dirty things to you," I continued dragging the tip of my nose across her cheek.

"Then do them," she urged tilting her head to the side.

"Oh, I will, trust me, but first, I want you to feel me. I want you to know in every move I make, that I want you and only you. Forever."

Bella whimpered when I brought my hand to her breast and applied slight pressure to her nipple.

"I don't ever want you doubting that you own me; every part of me. You already own my head my heart and my soul. And in a few minutes, you're going to own my dick as well."

I pressed myself against her and my cock slid against her clit.

She lifted her hips and I almost slipped inside of her. The head of my dick had pressed just past her outer lips. It took all of the control I had not to keep going. I wanted to feel her naked pussy gliding over me, wrapping me up in slippery warmth.

"Oh, God, Bella, hold on," I grunted.

"What?"

"I want to go bare with you, but I can't. I gotta get a condom."

Bella pulled her lip in between her teeth. "I'm completely covered, if that's what you're worried about."

"That's not what I'm worried about, baby. I...I still have to get my second HIV. I think I'm clear, but I can't take the risk, not with you." I didn't want to make love to her with a barrier between us. For the first time in my life, I wanted to be bare. But I wasn't stupid and I wouldn't take any more risks. Especially when it came to Bella. Once I got the final all clear, I would be able to give all of myself to her. I hoped that she would understand and watched her for any sign that she didn't, but it never came.

"Top drawer."

I just stared at her for a second.

She shrugged and a faint blush tinted her cheeks. "I bought them last week when you told me we were going to be alone this weekend. Just in case."

I smiled crookedly at her. "You are so fucking amazing."

I reached over and opened up the drawer. Sure enough, an unopened box of magnum condoms sat right on top. I sat back on my knees and ripped into the box, pulling out a row and tearing one off before tossing the box back onto the nightstand.

_I hate these stupid motherfucking things._

My hands were shaking as I tried to open the foil packet.

She obviously noticed my predicament and reached up, placing her hand on top of mine and pulled the packet from my grasp. She opened it and slowly rolled the condom onto me without breaking our gaze.

Bella lowered herself back down to the bed and I followed.

Her eyes burned with intensity and I almost lost my breath. I was right there, at her entrance. I grasped one of her hands in mine, threading my fingers through hers and resting them together next to her head. My other hand cradled her cheek. I pressed my lips against hers softly.

"I love you," I whispered with complete adoration.

"So much." She inhaled sharply as I pushed my hips forward. We both whimpered at the sensation as I slowly slid the entirety of my length inside of her. The feeling was so fucking incredible. She was warm, wet, and so fucking tight. For years, this is what I had been dreaming about. Not just being inside of her, but feeling her. The emotion in her eyes as her body stretched to accommodate me was like nothing I had ever witnessed. This woman was put on Earth for me and me alone and she knew it just as much as I did.

I felt Bella's grip on my hand tighten, her head pressing against the pillow and her mouth opening.

I was overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment that I hadn't really even started moving. I was all the way inside of her and although my body was telling me to fucking move, I couldn't. The sooner I moved, the sooner it would be over and I never wanted this to end.

BPOV

Jesus Christ he felt so good. My eyes rolled back into my head as he pushed all the way in. His thickness rubbing against all of my sensitive flesh at once. He was so gentle and loving. It had never been like this. Ever. No one else had held me like he was, like I was the most important thing in his world. This wasn't just about sex or getting off. For us, this was about an emotional connection to each other; one that we had both been longing for.

When our hips connected I expected him to pull back out, but he didn't. He didn't move. He was breathing heavily. His eyes were closed and his jaw was clenched. I could almost see him shaking.

I didn't know what was wrong, but I needed to make sure that he wasn't having regrets. The last time he had closed his eyes and it wasn't for a good reason.

"Edward, what's wrong?" I asked, concerned that I was losing him.

His eyes popped open, piercing through me. "Nothing, oh God, Bella, nothing is wrong. You feel so fucking amazing. It's just so much, too much. I'm afraid to move."

I squeezed my inner muscles and watched as his mouth dropped open. I needed him to remember who he was; who I was and what this was about. Finally claiming each other entirely.

"Oh fuck," he gasped. No longer able to hold still, he pulled out until I could feel just the tip of him inside of me. His chest was still heaving and he was staring at me.

"Show me," I begged, reading the emotion that radiated from every inch of his body. "Show me how much."

He nodded, grabbing my other hand and raising them both above my head. This position put more of his weight on top of me, pinning me to the bed as his mouth met mine.

He pushed back in and I raised my hips to meet him. He was so slow at first, but as our tongues touched he started to speed up. Every time he thrust into me I felt the burn of passion, the intensity, the love. He never took his eyes off of me, never closed them for more than the split second it took to blink. My body writhed against his, moaning, gasping and panting; begging him to make me his.

I felt that tightening in my lower body and knew that it wouldn't be long.

"Faster, Edward, please. I need you so fucking much."

Edward gripped my hands even tighter, making me wince, but as he began thrusting into me faster and harder, grunting his pleasure, and whispering words of desire, I forgot about anything other than our impending release.

When it hit me, I cried out. Profanities spewed from my mouth as my back arched a good six inches off the bed. Edward let go of one my hands to support my back as he continued to pound through my orgasm. I felt pressure against my lower back and heard him take in a huge breath of air just before I felt him start to pulsate inside of me. He let out an almost deafening roar. The fire in his eyes was all-consuming, piercing directly into my soul and causing another huge orgasm to rip through my body. I had never in my life climaxed so powerfully.

Watching him lose himself to me changed everything. This was the connection that had been missing from our relationship. That power that you know you hold over someone who loves you and recognizing that they hold the same power over you. As he came down from his post orgasmic high, he allowed his body to rest on top of mine. We lay like that, with him still inside of me until the emotion of what had just happened caught up with me. I felt it coming from my stomach, up into my chest and into my head. My eyes ached as I tried to push it back, but I couldn't. The tears poured down my face and I sobbed loudly.

Edward leaned back, wincing as he pulled out of me. His hand went to my face, his knuckles stroking my cheek.

"No, no, no, no!" he cried. "Please, Bella, no. Don't cry. I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?"

I leaned into his touch and reached up to pull him back to me. "I'm fine. You didn't hurt me; they're happy tears."

"Don't do that to me," he groaned, as he sat back on his heels. I watched as he gingerly removed the condom and pulled a tissue from the nightstand, wrapping it up and tossing in the metal waste basket. He then wiped his hands before laying back down and pulling my back into his chest.

"I'm sorry. I just never expected it to be so intense."

Edward buried his face in my hair. "That was fucking amazing."

I turned in his arms so that I was facing him. "Was it everything you expected it to be?"

"So much more," he smiled lazily. His eyes peeked open. "Um, I hate to sound clichéd, but was it good for you?"

I giggled. "Did it sound like it was good for me?"

Edward flashed his crooked smile.

"Are you fishing for compliments, Cullen?"

"Who me?" he feigned innocence.

"That was, by far, the most incredible, mind blowing experience I have ever had," I whispered, kissing his lips lightly. I felt his dick twitch against my thigh.

"Again? Already?"

"Impressed?" he smirked and cocked an eyebrow.

"I am completely in awe, baby," I teased. "I had no idea that your cock could do such amazing and wondrous things."

He rolled me onto my back. "You remember my promise to do dirty, dirty things to you?"

"Yeah," I grinned, biting down on my lower lip.

"I think it's time I showed you what I meant."

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**AN: Aaaaaannnnddd breathe. I should add a _To Be Continued_ there. At over 14000 words, it was time to stop. I can already see a few questions that will be coming my way and I will do my best to answer them. **

**Another crucial chapter for our couple. Was Cammy the foretold woman? Hmmmm. We shall see. **

**Please let me know your thoughts. This has been building for so long I hope it lived up to expectations.**

**This chapter REALLY took it out of both me and Mollie, so I am considering taking a tiny break b/c of the holiday. I don't feel like I've spent much time with my family. If I don't update with a new chapter next week, check out my profile b/c I will be doing an outtake to make up for it. Most likely it will be Edward's "first date" with Charlie when he took him to see Toy Story 3, but if you have something that you really want to read about, either send it in the review or PM me.**

**No Rec this week. I was so late working on the chapter, I forgot to choose one.**

**A link to the picture and description of the Steinway in the conservatory is profile page. **

**Next chapter: B & E's night has just begun**


	23. Getting Comfortable

**AN: Okay, well here we go. Thank you all so much for your holiday wishes. I hope everyone had a wonderful New Year.**

**Now, back to our regularly scheduled programming.**

**Thank you to everyone reading and reviewing. I read every single one. I haven't been very good at replying to earlier chapter reviews, but I'm going to try and do better with that.**

**Thank you to Mel for my gorgeous pictease as well as the one on my blog and for being my super duper pre-reader. Thank you, as always, to my super-beta Mollie for everything you do to make me confident that I am posting my best.**

**If you haven't checked out the outtake, it is now posted on my profile. It is EPOV of the first father/son outing he and Little Charlie had as well as his reaction to the "I love you, daddy." My plan is to definitely do more of the outtakes so stay tuned.**

**The usual disclaimer applies. This chapter is still seriously rated M. Please abide by the guidelines for such a rating.**

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Chapter 21: Getting Comfortable

EPOV

"I think it's time I showed you what I meant."

Bella's eyes were on me and her lower lip was tucked in between her teeth.

"I think I know what you meant," she grinned.

I smiled crookedly at her and just barely shook my head. "You have no idea," I crooned.

I slid my hand down, over the curve of her ass and hooked her thigh, draping it over mine and leaving her open. My now fully erect cock settled itself between her legs and she rolled her hips into me. I pushed her back into the mattress with my own body as I claimed her lips. I stayed there, kissing her fairly chastely still clutching her leg firmly to my body. She kept trying to grind against me, but I was holding my body in such a way that she wasn't getting what she needed.

I heard her growl softly in frustration and couldn't help but chuckle.

"What's the matter," I asked huskily, moving my mouth to her chin and scraping my teeth lightly across her skin.

"Don't make me promises if you're not going to follow through," she huffed.

I grinned, pushing her chin up with the bridge of my nose and kissing her throat.

"Who says I'm not going to follow through?"

She thrust upwards with her hips and I pulled mine away again.

"Edward!" she warned.

"I like you frustrated," I breathed, tracing my tongue along her collarbone.

"Well you're about to miss your window then."

I lifted my head. She was glaring at me. I untangled myself from her body so that she could move. "Roll over," I whispered.

Bella did as I asked and I moved to straddle her calves.

"Get on your hands and knees."

She sucked in a huge breath, but didn't hesitate. She simply pulled her knees up and lifted her body so that she was on all fours. I leaned forward, draping myself over her, feeling her small body arch into mine. I gripped her hips and all I wanted to do was plunge into her, but my plan for her was so much better than that.

"Put your hands on the wall," I ordered, as I removed my weight from her. She didn't even question me. Her back straightened and her lean body stretched, her breasts lifting as she raised her arms.

The second her palms were firmly planted above the headboard, I let go of her hips, trailing my hands up her side and around to cup her breasts.

"Your skin in so fucking soft," I breathed, pressing my mouth against her shoulder.

Her response was a soft mewl as she pushed her ass out towards my crotch.

"What do you want, Bella?" I asked, holding her to me.

"I want you to fuck me."

Just what I wanted to hear beautiful girl.

"Are you sure?" I asked, nipping at her neck.

"Did I stutter?" Bella retorted turning her head back to look at me. The sexy little smirk that graced her face told me that she was taunting me.

"I just want to make sure you know what you're getting yourself into."

"It's you getting yourself into something, not me," she grinned. "But if you don't hurry the hell up, I'm going to have to take care of myself."

I groaned at the image that popped into my head. "Oh, baby, I would love to see that...someday, but not right now. Right now, you belong to me."

I reached over to the nightstand, grabbing what I needed and tearing into it. Bella was still watching me. I sat back on my heels and slid the condom on as quickly as I could with my right hand. I tilted my head and licked my lips.

_What a fucking view._

Bella's ass was directly in front of me. When I gently ran my hands over it she shifted her knees slightly further apart giving me the perfect vantage point of where I wanted to be.

It was like her body was calling to me.

_What the fuck am I waiting for?_

I sat up, lining myself up with her pussy. She turned back towards the wall and bowed her head.

"Do you trust me, Bella?" I asked, in a low, breathy voice. I needed this. I need to know that we were on the same page; that she knew that all I wanted was to make her feel good and loved and cherished regardless of what we were doing.

"Yes." Her voice was soft, but left no doubt. I kissed the spot between her shoulder blades and entered her with a swift, but oh so blissful, push into her warmth.

_Fucking heaven_

"Is this what you wanted?" I grunted as I pulled out and then slid back in.

"God, yes."

I was working at an agonizingly slow pace, making sure she felt every inch of me.

"Edward?"

"Hmmmm?"

"Fuck me harder, please."

I grinned. "Your wish, my love."

I pulled out one more time and slammed back into her. My hips slapped against her ass adding to the symphony of the porn-star like sounds she was making.

"Oh fuck, baby, I love the way your pussy feels. I can't wait to fuck you bare."

Bella couldn't answer. Probably because of the force I was putting into each and every thrust. All of the sudden, her hands came off the wall and wrapped around the back of my neck as her head rested back on my shoulder. It was slightly more difficult to move that way, but it didn't stop me. My hips rhythmically pumped against her. One hand was curled up, gripping her breast, the other slid down and started rubbing wet circles around her clit. I dragged my tongue up the side of her neck and bit down on her ear.

"Uhhh," she moaned pleasurably. "I'm so close, Edward. Don't stop, don't stop, don't st...ah ah ah ah!"

_I love that fucking sound; the sound of my girl cumming so hard, she can't tell which way is up. My new favorite sound._

Her back curved, forcing her backside closer to me and her head harder against my shoulder.

Before her orgasm completely subsided, I placed my hand on her upper back and guided her to the mattress so that she was in a ball. I continued my movements and moments later I joined her in complete euphoria.

I collapsed onto the bed, stripping myself of the rubber and tossing it on the floor. I'd get it in the morning.

"Jesus Christ," Bella said, her chest heaving as she straightened out her body and curled into my side.

"Fuck!" I looked down at her and smiled crookedly. "Wow."

"Yeah."

I maneuvered the comforter and sheets around and we climbed underneath them. Bella nuzzled into the crook of my arm, her head resting on my chest.

"I love you," I sighed.

"I love you too."

We didn't say anything else. What else was there to be said? Bella was my every fantasy rolled into one tiny package. She could go from sweet and shy to kinky little minx in a matter of seconds.

As I listened to her breaths even out, I started to drift. My mind wandered to just how much what we had just done meant to me. The first time had been slow and loving and everything we needed it to be. It didn't erase the past, but it sent us in a new direction. An amazing direction. The second time was raw and passionate. Bella acknowledging her trust in me; the trust that I wouldn't hurt her even when it got a little rough, it was everything to me. This was uncharted territory for both of us and trust was key.

I buried my nose in her hair, inhaling her scent. She smelled of lavender and sex. The perfect combination to put me to sleep. Within minutes, I was out.

XXXXX

I woke the next morning when I felt the sheets slipping across my naked torso. I didn't need to open my eyes to know what was happening.

"Come back here," I groaned reaching for Bella. I managed to grip her hip and pull her backwards enough for me to wrap my other hand around her waist. I yanked her to me and heard her giggle as I nuzzled my nose into her hair and planted a kiss just behind her ear.

"I need to get up," she said.

"No you don't. Charlie's with my parents in Seattle, remember."

"Yes, Edward, I remember," she said, amusement lacing her voice. "Believe me, I remember, but I still have to get up."

"Why?" I whined.

"Because I have to pee."

I grunted in response and reluctantly let her go. But not before flipping her over and pressing my lips firmly against hers. I watched as she walked, completely and unabashedly naked, to her bathroom.

I threw my hands behind my head and stared up at the ceiling.

_Hands down, the best fucking night of my life._

I heard the door click across the room and watch Bella come out of the bathroom.

"Holy Fuck!" I breathed out.

Bella stood before me, her hair pulled up into a wild ponytail, a short, navy blue satin robe wrapped around her body. Her palm rested against the wall just above her head level.

"Come here," I demanded.

Bella shook her head. "No."

"Isabella!" I growled, sitting up.

She grinned at me. Her eyes were alight with mischief. I saw her inching her way towards the door and jumped up off the bed to block her escape route.

She laughed and snorted a little before covering her mouth. I looked down to see my morning wood pointing directly at her.

"Something funny?" I asked cocking my eyebrow at her.

She laughed even harder. "No," she managed to get out between her short little gasps of air.

"Really?"

I started stalking towards her. She backed up a little. I could see the nervousness in her eyes, but it was the kind of nervous you get when you're in one of those haunted houses and you know something is going to jump out at you, but you can't wait for it.

_Yeah, my girl wants to play._

"You do realize that there's no use in running, right?" I asked, sticking the tip of my tongue out between my teeth. The closer I got, the more she backed away.

"Oh, there's definitely a use," she teased.

I suddenly lunged for her, but the little vixen was quick. She screeched and jumped up and over the bed, throwing open the door and running out into the hall. I chased after her in all my naked glory. I didn't give a shit, when I caught her, the clothes would have just gotten in the way anyway.

She was pretty fast, but I was faster; and there was nowhere for her to go.

I caught her at the end of the hallway just before she reached the living room. I twirled her around and pushed her against the wall, my lips instantly crashing down on hers and then trailing down her neck to her collarbone, which had been exposed by her exertion.

"And what's the use," I begged, pressing my body against her and fighting with the tie on her robe.

"It gets you all fucking riled up and dominant," she gasped as one of my hands found her naked backside under her robe and I squeezed.

"You want me to dominate you?" I asked, slipping my fingers through her legs and finding her soaking wet core. I ran them up and down her slit, teasing her.

_Oh, I do believe the possibilities are endless._

I wanted to cry. Was it even conceivable that my Bella was into some of the kinky shit I'd always fantasized about?

"I just want you," she cried out when I plunged two fingers inside of her. "Ah, Edward."

I worked her for a few minutes before pulling my fingers out.

"Wha...what are you doing? Why did you stop?"

I sank to my knees in front of her and lifted up her robe, which I still hadn't managed to untie. I nudged her legs further apart and then looked up at her. She had this look of anticipation on her face, waiting for me and my magic fucking tongue. I think I started to drool. I dove in, swirling my tongue around, drinking her wetness up. I sucked her clit between my lips and listened to the little noises escaping her as she ran her fingers through my hair. I wasn't even going to need my fingers to make her cum, she was so fucking ripe and ready.

As one hand held her thigh, just above the knee, the other slid up and started working that tie again. This time I was able to loosen it. The moment she cried out from her orgasm I pulled my mouth away and stood up. I practically ripped the robe from her shoulders and lifted her off the ground, pinning her back against the wall.

"Edwaaaard," she moaned.

"Fucking, shit!" I growled as I realized that I didn't have a condom. I closed my eyes and rested my head against her shoulder, my chest heaving with my uncontrolled breaths. I felt Bella shifting against me, pulling her robe from where it was barely hanging from her wrists. I groaned in frustration. My dick was absolutely aching with the need to be inside of her. I was about to give up; to beg her to let me do it without one, even though it was my fucking rule, when I felt her slip something into my hand.

I lifted my head and opened my palm.

"What are you a girl scout?"

"Are you complaining?"

"Fuck no," I muttered.

I glanced between Bella and the prophylactic in my hand, trying to figure out how to keep her where she was, open the condom, and get it on. I looked at her and smirked.

"Hold on tight."

She wrapped her legs around my waist and put her forearms on my shoulders. I reached down with one hand and pulled on my dick so that it would rest comfortably in the upright position between us. I thrust my hips against her, holding her in place. She squeaked and looked down.

"Holy shit! I can't believe that thing fits inside of me."

I chuckled and took my hands off of her so I could get myself situated. It's not like she hadn't seen the thing before. Was she just now realizing how big it was?

As I was opening up the condom, Bella dug her heels in and started rubbing her pussy against me. She was spreading her juices all over my cock and creating amazing friction.

"You're tempting fate," I hissed.

She kept going, bringing her head close to mine and I could feel her breath against my cheek. "How so?"

I turned my head so that our lips brushed against each other. "I'm about to forget about the fucking condom and just plow into you," I threatened playfully.

Bella lifted herself up and when she slid back down, it was right over my cock.

"Ahhhhhhhh," I groaned, gripping her hips. I was inside of her. Not entirely, but I was there. She was purposely still holding herself up. If she loosened the grip her legs had on me at all, she would impale herself completely. I was warring with myself, desperately wanting to make her lose her balance so I could fill her

"Baby, don't tease," I said through gritted teeth.

She lifted herself back up and off of my dick, her expression apologetic with a hint of amusement.

"I'm sorry. I just can't wait to feel you cum inside of me," she moaned.

_Fucking Christ. I'm not going to last if she keeps talking like that._

I didn't waste any time. It took me approximately five seconds to slip the rubber on before I repositioned myself and rammed her down onto me.

She yelped and I groaned. I was buried really fucking deep.

I looked into her eyes waiting until she was ready for me to go. I needed her consent, because I was going to go hard and fast. I would never have her like that again without making sure that's how she wanted it.

And want it she did. The second I saw her eyes flicker, I pulled out, slamming back into her. Her fingernails dug into my neck and I went again and again, relishing in her not so silent cries for harder, faster, make me cum, Edward, PLEEEEEEAASE.

I looked down and watched as my dick slid in and out, in and out. Oh fuck, it was beautiful. My thrusts became urgent as I felt myself start to tighten. I needed to get her there fast. I was so distracted by making my girl cum, that I didn't even notice as several frames fell from the wall I held her against, cracking and shattering.

"Oh, God, Edward...so fucking good."

"Bella, baby, I..." I was panting so hard, I couldn't even get the words out.

"Just go," she urged.

I wanted to wait for her, but I couldn't. I was already there and I couldn't force it back.

"Are you sure? I want you to..."

She nodded. "I will, just go."

I lost my hold on myself and stalled my movements just briefly. I held my breath as I came, letting out weak, strangled noises, and then continued to thrust. I slid my hand down to where we were joined and gently pinched her swollen nub. That was all she needed to throw her over the edge. Her walls squeezed my still throbbing cock, pulsing and throbbing, and oh so good. My legs gave out and I fell to my knees, taking Bella with me. Our bodies were slippery with sweat.

"Good morning," she giggled.

"No, great fucking morning," I replied, resting my forehead against hers.

After a shower and a blow job, which ended up with me finger fucking Bella until she practically fucking screamed her lungs raw, we got dressed and made our way over to the main house. Bella was out of coffee and I'll be damned if we both didn't need that shit.

I dragged Bella into the house behind me. We were laughing and kissing and groping. We stumbled into the kitchen, completely oblivious to our surroundings. I pulled her to me and my hand was just about to slip its way into the back of her pants when I heard a throat clearing.

Bella's eyes widened and I grimaced. We turned our heads to find Jasper and Alice sitting at the dining room table. Alice had a cup of coffee in front of her face, but I could see her shoulders shaking in laughter. Jasper, too, was trying to suppress his amusement and failing miserably.

His lips pursed and he made smacking sounds. His hands fidgeting, scratching at the side of his head and then the back of his neck.

I let go of Bella and chuckled as I saw her face flush with embarrassment.

"Uh, Good morning?" I said, making it sound like more of a question than a statement.

Jasper nodded and looked at Alice who suddenly burst out laughing.

"What the fuck? It's not like I've never walked in on you two making out before," I scoffed.

"Yeah, uh, you might want to check to make sure all the windows in the apartment are closed tonight," Jasper grinned.

_Oh shit!_

Bella's jaw dropped and her face went from simply pink to almost crimson.

"Oh my God," she whispered.

"So, yeah," Jasper chuckled.

Bella suddenly bolted from the kitchen and out the front door. I followed her quickly glaring at Jasper on my way out. When I caught up to her, she was staring at the second floor of the garage. Sure enough, there were two windows open. One of them was in Bella's bedroom, the other just off the kitchen.

"Oh, oh, oh," Bella cried, turning and burying her face in my chest.

"Don't worry about it, baby. At least they know how passionately we feel towards each other." I was trying to keep my the laughter out of my voice, but it was really fucking difficult.

"Shut-up," she groaned smacking my chest half-heartedly. "Do you know how embarrassing this is?"

_This quick Cullen._

I absolutely did not want her to feel any bit of embarrassment about our...activties.

"Did Alice ever tell you about the time Carlisle walked in on them?"

Bella's head snapped up. "No!"

I grinned wickedly. "Come on back inside, Bella.

When we got back to the kitchen I poured two cups of coffee and Bella and I took our seats across from Jasper and Alice.

"We weren't trying to listen," Alice said quietly. "But you made it kind of hard not to."

I looked at Bella and winked. "So, Alice, I thought you could tell Bella a little story," I smiled.

Alice tilted her head. She looked over at Jasper who shrugged.

"What story?"

"Well, I think it's only fair that, having thoroughly embarrassed my girlfriend, that she get a little something in return, don't you?"

"What are you talking about?" Alice asked, narrowing her eyes at me.

"Thanksgiving weekend, two years ago."

"Uh..." Jasper choked.

"Oh, no, no, no," Alice said, shaking her head.

"Oh, come on, it's funny."

"It was not funny at the time, and it is not funny now, Edward."

"It's kind of funny...now," Jasper said quietly, staring down into his cup and trying not to show Alice his amusement.

Alice shot him a look that would have turned the polar ice caps into a giant swimming pool.

"I'll tell the story then," I grinned.

Alice put her head in her hands. "Fine," she acquiesced.

Bella looked at me curiously.

"So we were all at the Brownstone in Boston for the long weekend," I started. "Rose, Em, Mom, Dad, and I went out to dinner on the Saturday night. Jasper claimed he was sick and Alice stayed home to take care of him." I glanced over at Jasper who was smirking.

"Well, Carlisle started to feel bad in the middle of the meal. He thought maybe he was coming down with what Jasper had."

Jasper snorted and Alice glared at him.

"I offered to drive him home and when we got there, the lights were all off, so we figured that Allie and Jazz were in their room."

Alice sighed and shook her head.

"I went into the kitchen and Carlisle went into the back sitting room to get something or other and the next thing I know, I hear screaming and swearing and Carlisle comes flying into the kitchen like his fucking pants are on fire. I thought that there was a burglar so I go running into the back room with one of Mom's monster carving knives. Carlisle tried to get me to stop, but he couldn't get the words out before I got in there."

"Okay, okay, you get what he walked in on, that's enough," Alice said, her eyes wide and pleading."

"I don't think so, little sister," I laughed.

Bella was glancing between us, not really knowing who to look at.

"I get in there and Jasper is buck naked with just a pair of cowboy boots and a Stetson on trying desperately to untie a naked, hog-tied Alice while she's flopping around on the floor."

Bella burst out laughing. "Oh my God, are you kidding me?"

I shook my head. "I was completely speechless for a second before I had to turn around and walk out. It was one of those 'what the fuck did I just see' moments," I laughed. "Carlisle was absolutely mortified."

"I was mortified," Alice screeched. "And now I'm mortified again, thank you very much."

"Oh, Alice," Bella gasped through her tears. "That is the funniest, most embarrassing thing I have ever heard."

"Yes, thank you, Bella," Alice pouted, crossing her arms across her chest.

Jasper was grinning. "Let's just say, that was the last time we tried that while co-habitatin with the family," he drawled.

Alice punched his shoulder.

"Oh, I feel much better now. Thank you, baby," Bella said leaning her head against my arm and rubbing my thigh.

Of course, her hand being that close to my dick made it jump in excitement. She must have felt it twitch, because the next thing I know, she's stroking me through my jeans under the table.

"Yeah, well, whatever. I could tell some embarrassing stories about you too, but I'm going to take the more adult route and keep my mouth shut," Alice huffed, seemingly unaware of what was happening practically right under her nose.

Jasper wasn't so clueless though. His eyes met with mine for the briefest of moments before he pulled her up. "Come on, darlin, we've got more house huntin to do today."

Alice looked at him oddly, probably wondering why he was suddenly so interested in looking for a house, before giving in and walking out of the room. Jasper allowed her to go in front of him and turned to face us.

"Just some advice," he grinned. "I don't recommend using restraints in family common areas, it's not always as easy as you think."

I couldn't help but let out a bark of a laugh. Sometimes Jasper could be really fucking funny.

The minute he was out of the room, Bella was in my lap.

"Well, hello there."

"Hi," she cooed, grinding herself against me.

"You're a little bit insatiable aren't you?"

"Just a little bit," she giggled holding up her thumb and index finger to show me just how little.

"We'll have to wait until Jazz and Allie leave," I breathed into her ear.

Bella let out a whiny little groan and wrinkled her nose. "I don't wanna."

"You know she's going to be back in here before they leave, do you really want her and possibly Jasper walking in on us when I'm buried in your..."

Bella's mouth connected with mine. She pushed her tongue into my mouth, but when I went to wrestle with her, she pulled back.

"Are you teasing me or are you just being mean?" I asked.

"Just trying to get your attention."

I grabbed her hand and placed it on my jean covered cock. "You've had my full attention for the last eighteen hours." I grunted when she squeezed me. "Well technically it's been a hell of a lot longer than that, but who's counting." I threw my head back and just let myself enjoy her stroking, but suddenly she stopped.

I opened my eyes when she leaned backwards. She grabbed a banana from the basket in the center of the table. She flashed me an angelic smirk; yes, there is such a thing, and began peeling the skin back, plucking the naked banana from its shell. My mouth fell open as I watched her tease the tip with her tongue before slipping her mouth over it. She was performing fellatio on a fucking banana while sitting on my lap. I couldn't bring myself to stop watching her do it. She bobbed her head even further and I gaped as most of the banana disappeared down her throat.

"Don't you have a fucking gag reflex?" I asked, stunned.

She shook her head and pulled the banana back out, still fully intact.

"Well, why the fuck haven't you done that to me?"

"I've taken you pretty far back."

"Not that far," I pouted.

"Well I guess I know what I'll be doing for the rest of the morning then," she laughed and then shoved the banana back through her lips.

"We're heading out," Alice said, peeking her head around the corner. Bella jumped and nearly choked, but managed to remove the banana from her mouth.

"Okay, have a good time," Bella said genuinely, just before she took a huge bite of the banana.

I whimpered.

As soon as I heard the front door slam shut, I stood up, taking Bella with me. I would have taken her right there on the table, but I thought twice about it. The last time I'd done shit in the public areas of my parents house, I'd gotten caught. It wasn't the same and I knew that, but nevertheless, I figured I'd take her back to the apartment. She squealed as I threw her over my shoulder and ran outside. I glanced around, noticing that Jasper's truck was still in the driveway. The bastard was laughing at me. I flipped him off, but didn't slow. I couldn't get her to her apartment fast enough. I burst through the door and locked it quickly before setting her down and attacking her mouth. We made it as far as the kitchen, but I was too impatient. I lifted her onto the counter top and stripped off her shirt. My hands were like magnets to her lacy bra covered tits. I cupped them, pushing them up and together, watching as those perfect little mounds moved around. My lips attached themselves to the space between them.

"Fuck, I can't get enough of you," I murmured against her skin.

"Get me naked then," she demanded.

"Yes ma'am." I snapped open the button of her jeans and she lifted her butt up off the counter so I could slip them off. Bella frantically tugged at my Henley to get me to take it off. If I could have ripped the sucker from my body, I would have. I was pretty fucking strong, but not that strong.

I was just about to relieve Bella of her bra, when we heard a honk. I looked at the clock and saw that it was already almost noon. What the hell had we been doing all morning? Oh...yeah.

Bella leaned over to look out the kitchen window. "Oh, shit!" she yelped, pushing me away and jumping off the counter, scrambling to collect her clothes that I had tossed all over the kitchen floor.

Carlisle's Mercedes was pulling into the driveway as Jasper and Alice were driving out. I was pretty sure that the honk was for our benefit. No doubt that this was the first place Charlie would come looking for us.

Bella groaned.

Once we were both dressed, we slipped on shoes and made our way outside. Mom had Charlie's door open and had just let him loose when he spotted me.

"Daaaaaaddy!" he squealed jumping into my arms.

"Uhf," I grunted catching Charlie's knee a little too close to the goods.

I heard Bella giggle behind me. "Be careful with your daddy, baby."

"Sorry, Daddy," Charlie smiled sheepishly. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, buddy."

I kissed his head and handed him to Bella

"Hi, Mommy," he mumbled as he buried his face into Bella's shoulder and squeezed as tightly as he could.

"Did you have a good time?"

"Uh huh."

"Are you going to tell me all about it?"

He nodded and then furrowed his brow. "I'm hungry first."

"Okay, let's go get you some lunch," my mom smiled. Bella set Charlie down and Esme took his hand, leading him inside.

I put my arm around her shoulders as we went to follow them in.

"If he's not a little more careful with that knee, he's not gonna have any brothers or sisters," I joked, but then stopped suddenly when I realized what I'd said. "Uh..."

_Oh, fuck, what did I just say?_

Bella didn't say anything. I took a chance to glance at her and saw her staring straight ahead, her lips twitching at the corners.

"I...that just came out," I tried to explain.

"It's okay, Edward," she said quietly.

I would have given anything to have known what she was thinking at that moment. I could have asked. I should have asked. But I didn't. I just kept my arm draped over her and escorted her inside. Did I want more kids? I hadn't really ever thought about it. I don't even know why I said it. I loved having siblings so it only seemed fair that Charlie should have them too.

I thought about Bella. I thought about making love to her and creating another baby. I could see the joy in her eyes as she told me and the emotion of watching her belly grow round and swollen. I could just imagine Charlie's excitement as we prepared him to be a big brother.

"What are you smiling about?" Bella asked.

"Hmmm, I'll tell you later." I wasn't quite ready to tell her that I'd already started planning our future. I knew that she loved me and that she wanted to be with me, but I didn't want to freak her out and I was certain if I started talking about more babies and everything else that came along with that, she'd probably panic.

By the time we got into the kitchen, my mom had already pulled out the fixings for sandwiches. I reached into the fridge and grabbed myself a beer.

"Want something?" I asked Bella. She shook her head no. "Mom?"

"No thank you, dear."

"So, how was it?" I asked, planting myself next to Charlie at the island.

"I saw the monkeys," Charlie said excitedly.

"You did?"

"Uh huh. And bears. And a wion."

"A wion?"

He nodded. "Wow, I'm not sure I've ever seen a wion."

"He's at the zoo, Daddy. Gramma and Papa can take you too."

My mom and Bella both giggled.

"What else did you do?"

"I went on da...da..." Charlie scowled. "What was that cawed again?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, sweetheart," Mom said, cutting the crusts off of his peanut butter and jelly sandwich before she set it down in front of him.

"Da thing that went around. Wif the horsies."

"Oh, the carousel."

"Yeah!" he grinned. "And we eated ice cream."

Charlie bit into his sandwich like it was a fucking raw steak and he was a starving animal.

"I'm making turkey and roast beef as well, would either of you like one?" Mom asked.

"Esme, you don't have to do that. You've been in a car for three hours."

"It's no bother, Bella, I'm making one for myself and Carlisle anyway." She waved her hand in the air.

"I'll have a roast beef," I grinned. Bella frowned at me.

She started to make her way around the island to help, but my mom stopped her.

"Don't even think about it," she warned with a smile. "Sit your butt on that stool. Do you want turkey or roast beef?"

"Turkey please," Bella acquiesced.

As Charlie was finishing up his sandwich, his head started to sag and his blinks were getting longer.

"Did he sleep in the car at all?" Bella asked, taking one last bite of her sandwich before picking him up.

"No, he talked. All the way home, he talked," Carlisle chuckled.

I put my hand on the back of Charlie's head and smiled gently at him as he laid his head down on Bella's shoulder.

"I'm going to go put him down for a bit," she said, turning. Instinctively I leaned in and kissed the side of her mouth tenderly.

"I'm going to go check in at the hospital," Carlisle excused himself.

I stood with my back against the counter top sipping my beer. "Something on your mind there, Mom?" I asked, feeling her eyes on me.

"Come sit with me," she said. I let out a puff of air. That's what she said when she was about to either lecture me or tell me bad news. I wondered which it would be this time.

I sat down, taking a big swig of my beer before meeting her gaze.

"I am so, so proud of you. You know that don't you?" she said, grabbing my free hand and rubbing it in between her slightly cooler, smaller ones.

I didn't know how to respond. I lowered my eyes and stared at an invisible spot on the table, waiting for the big "but".

She put her hand on my chin, forcing me to look at her again.

"I love you, Edward. You are my son, my baby. I see you with that little boy and...you are so amazing.

I swallowed, but still didn't say anything.

"I think you should know that the entire time we were gone he talked about you."

I smiled unconsciously, "He did?"

"Uh huh," she nodded. "He talked about how you played pirates with him and how you read to him. He talked about you teaching him to play the piano and pretending to be Darth Vader so he could stab you with his light saber. He might have even mentioned something about you showing him how to pee like a big boy. I'm glad to hear that the cheerios worked." Mom smirked and I chuckled.

"He loves you so much, Edward."

"I love him too," I sighed.

"And you love Bella." It wasn't a question.

I nodded. "Yeah, I do."

Mom looked at me. I couldn't read the expression on her face.

"I am so sorry," she whispered. I could hear the emotion in her voice and saw her eyes gloss over. "I should have told you that a long time ago."

"What are you sorry for?" I asked, my face scrunched up in confusion.

"I'm sorry for a lot of things. For not paying more attention to you when you were a teenager. For not insisting that you get rid of that vile Tanya girl. For not saying anything to you after the dozens of times I caught you staring at Bella with a look of longing on your face."

My mouth gaped open at her.

"Yes, I saw it, Edward. But I guess I never recognized it for what it was. You never really spoke to her other than to tease her. You seemed so content with your life that I figured I must have imagined it. You were such different personalities."

Mom took a sip of water.

"But most of all, I'm sorry for doubting you. When Bella first told us about Charlie, my instinct was to be furious with her. I never for a moment doubted her like your father did. I don't know why, something just told me that you two had...been intimate. And I was soooo angry with her, Edward. But when she told us what happened, how you took her, I..." My mom inhaled shakily.

"The more I thought about it, the more I wondered who you even were. I knew she hadn't told us everything, but what she did tell us was brutal enough. I mean, whatever happened between the two of you was bad enough for her to lose all faith in our entire family."

By this point I had set my beer down and was pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Do not think for one moment that I forgave her so quickly. Every time I laid eyes on Charlie I was reminded of how much time was stolen from us. I should have told you about him the moment we found out, but I was afraid. I was afraid that we would lose even more. She was not the same little girl that she had always been and we didn't know her anymore. I didn't know if she would take him and run and I wanted so desperately to be a part of that little boy's life that I was willing to turn my back on you; my own child."

My mom blinked a long, slow blink and I saw the tears slipping from the corners of her eyes.

"Alice and I agreed that we would give Bella one week to tell you after you returned. She had begged us to let her tell you herself and we thought maybe that was best, that it should be her that you heard it from. I didn't think you'd take it well, but I had no idea that you would respond the way that you did. What I saw in your eyes when you came home the next morning was not the man that I raised. I couldn't help but wonder where I had gone wrong. My insecurity as a mother was taken out on you. I should have supported you and talked you through it and I'm sorry."

I encompassed my mom's hand in both of mine and brought it to my mouth. My chest was tight with emotion. My mom had always been so strong, so sure of herself. Watching her lose herself in front of me broke my heart.

"You had every right to doubt me," I assured softly. "I doubted myself for a long time. I never even contemplated having children and suddenly I was a father to a little boy that I didn't know; forever connected to an experience that I did not want to remember. I...I said some horrible things. I don't blame you for your reaction, Mom, I don't. Especially now."

She smiled sadly at me. "You've come such a long way. You are so good with him." She looked up at me. "And you're so good with Bella."

"Good with Bella?"

My mom raised her free hand to my jaw and cupped it gently.

"You're good together and you're good as a family. The man you are with them is the man that I always thought you'd be."

"Thanks, Ma. They really make me happy. "

We sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Carlisle returned.

"That son of yours can eat, let me tell you," he said pulling a can of Coke from the fridge and popping the top.

"I know," I chuckled. "I think he's going to rival Emmett with that appetite."

"I think he already does. You know he ate almost an entire rack of ribs for dinner last night."

I glanced over at my mom. "Uh, that must have been an interesting dinner."

She rolled her eyes. "You're father's idea, of course. I tried to get the barbecue stains out of his shirt, but all I had was the bathroom sink and I didn't have time to send it to the hotel laundry. I put it in a plastic bag, I'll go get it.

My mom returned with the bag and I headed back to the apartment. When I got there, I found Bella snuggled up in Charlie's bed with him. Both were fast asleep. I don't think I would have figured out she was up there with him if it hadn't been for her mumbling something about not denting her car.

I spent the next couple of hours tidying up and washing two loads of laundry and the sheets from Bella's bed.

That night, after Charlie went down, Bella and I sat on the sofa. The television was on, but I couldn't tell you what was playing. Bella was curled up into the corner, with her legs pulled up underneath her and a blanket covering her. I was fiddling with my iPhone, adding apps that I thought Charlie would think were cool. Yes, I realized that he was three, but that didn't mean that he couldn't enjoy a little supervised iFun.

Bella shifted and stretched her legs out towards me. Without thinking, I put my hand on her bare foot and started rubbing. I felt her staring at me and when I looked up, her eyes were trained on where my thumb was pressing firmly into the sole of her foot. I smirked to myself and set my iPhone down on the coffee table. Bella's tongue flicked out to wet her lower lip. Her eyes went back to her book, but I'm pretty sure she was finding it difficult to concentrate. She kept closing her eyes every time I hit certain spots.

And then the sounds started. They were nearly silent, but I heard them. The whimpers, the moans, the sighs. They were so reminiscent of when I was inside her that my dick immediately sat up and took notice. You'd think my hands were making love to her foot, the way she was reacting.

I slid one my hands up her calf, under the sweatpants she was wearing and massaged the muscle.

"Do you have any idea what you're doing to me?" she asked in a light, husky voice.

"I think I have some idea, yeah." I dragged my nails gently down her leg.

"I'm trying to read?"

"I can stop if you'd like."

"No! Please don't stop. That feels fucking amazing."

"I think I've heard that before," I said waggling my eyebrows and her. "If this is how you are with just a foot massage, I really think I should try a whole body massage."

Bella's chin dropped and her eyes got this intense and hungry look to them.

_I think I just said the magic word._

If I didn't think I'd have looked like a total douche, I would have totally fist bumped myself.

My hand slid back up her leg, bypassing her calf, over her knee and finally resting on her thigh.

"Ya know, it's kind of hard to do this with those pants on," I complained.

"Edward, they're sweats," she scoffed with a smile.

"Yeah, but...but it would be easier if you just took them off."

"Things usually tend to get harder when I take off my clothes," she giggled.

"Shit, things get hard when I just think about you taking off your clothes."

I returned my hand to her calf, just under her knee and gave a firm tug. She squealed as she was taken off guard, her whole body shifting towards me. Her book flew out of her hand and landed on the floor with a thud.

"Look what you did," she accused. "You just made me lose my place."

"Awww, I'm so sorry," I lied, getting up and crawling over her now that her back was flat against the sofa.

"No you're not."

I kissed her cheek, her jaw, her chin, her nose; essentially everywhere but her lips.

"Gimme your lips," she growled, turning her head to try and capture them with hers.

"I am giving you my lips."

"Nuh uh."

"I am, see." I kissed her forehead, her temple, and then the spot in front of her ear."

She huffed and I snickered before finally giving in, taking her soft, plump lower lip between mine.

"Mmmm, you taste like chocolate. Why do you taste like chocolate?" she asked.

I shrugged. "I must just naturally be sweet."

"Bullshit, where are you hiding the chocolate?"

I laughed. "I'm not hiding any chocolate, Bella. Now come back here."

"I'm going to find that chocol...mpfh."

I wasn't about to tell her I had a secret stash of Hershey's kisses in my coat pocket. She allowed me to probe her mouth with my tongue. I felt her hand snake down and I figured she was going to start stroking me. That is until I felt her hand slip into my pocket.

"I don't have any chocolate in there," I laughed. "But move your hand a few inches to the left and you'll find something just as sweet."

"You're a pig," she teased trying to push me away, but failing entirely. "Can I please have some chocolate?" She batted her eyelashes at me in an overly dramatic way.

"Fine," I huffed. "But you have to close your eyes."

Bella did as I asked and I leaned back to grab my coat from the back of the sofa, pulling a chocolate kiss from my pocket.

"Keep them closed," I purred, returning to my position on top of her. I peeled the foil from the kiss and grabbed the tip with my teeth. I leaned in and shook my head back and forth so that the kiss brushed against her lips. She opened her mouth and I gently placed it on her tongue, sealing it with my own.

"So good," she moaned. I wasn't sure what exactly was so good as she pocketed the chocolate in her cheek and stroked my tongue with hers.

My hand wandered from her face, down her arm, to her hip. I fingered the waistband of her sweats and then slowly started to pull them down. I didn't know how Bella would feel getting naked with me on the couch with Charlie just in his room so I was a little hesitant.

"I'll go get the baby monitor," she said as if reading my mind.

"Do you just want to move to the bedroom?"

She bit her lip with a look of contemplation on her face before nodding. I rolled off of her and helped her up before following her to the bedroom.

We undressed each other; every move deliberately made, every touch making me love her even more. Her fingertips danced across my over-heated skin causing me to shiver and break out into goose bumps.

"You are so beautiful," she whispered, placing a kiss on my chest just over my heart.

"Can I make love to you?" I asked, brushing a wayward strand of hair from her face.

She smiled, silently agreeing.

I pulled the comforter and sheets down on the bed and brought her down with me.

We moved together, pushing, pulling, giving and taking. This was love. Pure, unadulterated, unequivocal love. Nothing would ever compare. Bella's mouth fell open in ecstasy, with barely more than high pitched sigh. I quickened my pace until I too, was tumbling and trembling, falling only for her.

I cleaned myself up and rolled back over, wrapping my arm around her waist. Her eyes were closed, but her lips were twitching in satisfaction.

It was then, while watching her start to drift into sleep that I realized that I had no idea if she expected me to stay or go. Yes, I had stayed the night before, but now, now our relationship had changed.

"I can't...I don't...I don't want to leave." My voice sounded weak and pathetic. "Can I stay with you?"

"Yeah," Bella breathed sleepily. "I don't want you to go."

I let out a puff of air in relief and held her closer as we both let sleep claim us.

XXXXXX

"What is that?" Bella asked as she wrapped her arms around my waist and snuggled into my side.

It was Tuesday and my mom had just come to the apartment to bring me my mail. She and Bella sat talking for an hour while I avoided the contents.

I turned the envelope over in my hand and waited for her reaction.

"Um, wow. Are you going to open it?"

"I don't know if I want to know."

She frowned "Why wouldn't you want to know?"

"This could change so many things," I sighed. My heart had sped up and was causing me to feel a little bit dizzy.

"Yes, it could, but I love you no matter what it says. Nothing will change that."

_God I hope so, beautiful girl. I cannot do this without you._

I rubbed my hand up and down her arm and kissed the side of her head.

"Do you want to do it for me?" I asked with pleading eyes.

Bella smiled softly. "No. I think you need to do it, Edward."

I nodded, gulped, and grabbed the letter opener. I took one more look at Bella before pulling out the contents of the letter. I read it slowly.

"Holy shit!" Bella whispered.

Holy shit indeed.

_Dear Mr. Edward Anthony Cullen,_

_I am pleased to inform you that you have been selected to interview with Columbia University's College of Physicians and Surgeons._

_Based on your impressive qualifications, you are eligible for admission, however, the final decision on your acceptance will be made by a panel of physicians, surgeons, alumni and faculty._

I read the rest of the letter carefully.

"When did you apply?"

I looked at her sheepishly. "I applied to Columbia and Harvard before I left Boston. I applied to Duke, Johns Hopkins, and UW about a week after you told me about Charlie."

I watched as Bella swallowed, her eyes were hesitant and almost fearful. I knew what she was thinking. UW was the only school that was on the west coast.

"Columbia's one of the best medical schools in the country," she said in a quiet voice.

"Yeah, it is."

I continued to stare at the piece of paper in my hands. It started to shake a little and I realized that my hands were trembling.

"Bella, I..."

"I'm really excited for you."

We both spoke at the same time.

"When do you have to go for the interview?"

I looked down at the paper again. "I don't know. I have to call the number. My guess is probably a few weeks."

She bit her lip, nodding.

"I...I can tell them no."

Bella's head snapped up and she looked horrified. "You will absolutely not do that," she scolded.

"Bella, if you don't want me to go. There are plenty of medical schools closer that I can apply to."

"Don't!"

"What?"

"Don't do this to me."

I stared at her. What was I doing?

"Do what to you?"

"Go and do your interviews. Make a decision based on what you want to do. Then we'll talk about it. You've got ten months before school starts, right?"

I nodded and pulled her around so that she was in front of me. "I'm not going to leave you," I promised.

"And I'm not going to hold you back."

"You're not holding me back."

"If you don't go to that interview, then I won't believe you."

"I applied there before I knew."

"It doesn't matter. You applied there because you thought that it would be a great school to go to."

"Are we really arguing over this?"

"No, we're not. You're going to go to that interview."

I pinched the bridge of my nose with one hand. "You're being a pain in the ass."

She pulled away. "You're the one being a pain in the ass. I'm not fighting about this anymore."

"And if I say no?"

She smiled antagonistically at me. "What's the worst thing I could do to you right now?"

_Fuck, she wouldn't._

"You wouldn't."

"You want to try me?"

I grabbed her wrist and pulled her back to me again. I locked our gazes. I didn't believe that she would cut me off. The passion between us was too intense. Her craving for me was just as strong as mine was for her. But I could see that she was serious about the interview. This was something that I would have to do.

"Okay."

She sighed and leaned into my embrace. "Thank you."

I hummed. "I'll call tomorrow."

XXXXX

The next two weeks absolutely flew by. I had gotten interview letters from Harvard and Duke as well and set up the interviews all for the same week. I would travel to Duke first, then up to Columbia and finally to Harvard. I had ten days before I left; right after Halloween.

"Bella, why don't you come with me? My parents can watch Charlie," I sort of whined as I was doing the dishes. I had spent every single night at the apartment; always getting up before Charlie. Sometimes I would still be there when he woke up, but sometimes I would already be out.

"I can't," Bella sighed. "There's too much to do at work."

Things had been going okay for Bella at work. Apparently Cammy had opened her nasty ass mouth to their boss, Luke, and told him how she fucked me. Bella said that he'd just about lost it. He put Bella on Monday, Wednesday, Friday shifts and Cammy on Tuesday, Thursday shifts so they never saw each other. Even their staff meetings had been nixed. Bella didn't talk about it much and I didn't pry. I think she was trying to find out exactly what Cammy was doing. She said that she was pretty sure that it was something illegal, but couldn't prove it. I was considering actually having a talk with Chief Swan. It would mean probably facing his anger about what I had done, but I didn't trust Cammy and if she was drugging men, she needed to be fucking stopped.

"Luke can't miss you for a week?"

"No. He's not getting any other help really and if I leave, even for a couple of days, he'll fall behind."

I finished the last pan and set it in the drainer before drying my hands on the hand towel.

"Baby, I just want to spend time with you." I moved behind her, looking around me. Charlie was sitting in the living room banging two cars together and making crashing noises. I reached around and cupped her tit, rubbing my thumb over her nipple until I felt it perk up.

"Mmmmm," I hummed, letting my breath waft over her ear.

She shivered and shifted. It took so little for me to turn her on. The sex had been absolutely amazing. Bella had gotten her period for one of the weeks and refused to let me touch her, but she was really generous with giving me pleasure. And we made out like a bunch of horny teenagers every chance we got. Once that was done, she was a complete fucking wild cat; always meeting me where I needed her. But at the same time, there were moments where we were soft and gentle and loving. I no longer felt emotionless. Instead, I was usually consumed with emotion. I adored making love to her. The little whimpers of pleasure, watching her lose herself as I held her as close as I possibly could. The unhurried release. We'd had to keep it down so that we didn't wake Charlie up and we hadn't yet ventured out of the bedroom for fear that he would catch us, but we were due for some alone time. My mom had been busy in Seattle with some uber-client and my dad had picked up extra shifts at the hospital because one of his colleagues had gotten pneumonia. Alice and Jasper had signed a contract on a house on the outskirts of Port Angeles and Emmett and Rose were still acting really weird.

We had taken Charlie to meet Mrs. Jane and then taken him back because he was so enamored by the conservatory that he had a fit about leaving. I'd never seen anything like that before. Bella said it wasn't entirely unusual, it just came in short bursts. It freaked me the fuck out and I almost had a mini-meltdown myself, but Bella talked me through it; and then comforted me that night. Mrs. Jane just sat back and snickered at me as I tried to carry a thrashing Charlie back out of the house and then strap him in his seat.

"Luke said we should be done by Christmas. Maybe afterwards we can use the gift your parents got me for my birthday," Bella said, interrupting my thoughts.

I kept massaging her breast, plucking at her nipple until she pushed my hand away.

"That's getting annoying."

"You being all done sounds really good. A trip to Vail sounds even better," I mumbled before planting a kiss on her neck and turning away. "Do you want me to get Charlie into bed?"

She looked up from the papers in front of her. "Uh, yeah, thanks, baby."

I got Charlie into his pajamas and sat down to read him a book. When I was finished he yawned and looked up at me.

"Daddy, do you wiv here?"

"Um..."

_Fuck, how do I answer that question?_

"Uh, not really, buddy, kind of?"

Charlie bit his lip. "I remember Riwey."

At that, my stomach jumped into my throat. "I do too, Charlie, now it's time to go to bed."

I wasn't trying to dismiss his thoughts, but what was I supposed to fucking say?

"I wike you here, Daddy," he said burrowing into my chest.

"I like being here too, buddy."

I lifted him up into his bed and kissed him goodnight before leaving the room.

Bella was still staring intently at her papers. I sat down beside her and waited until she acknowledged me.

"Did he go down okay?" she asked tilting her head in my direction but not looking away.

"Yeah, I guess."

She looked over at me in question.

"He asked me if I lived here."

"Oh. What did you tell him?"

"What was I supposed to tell him? I honestly don't know where the fuck I live."

"Uh..."

"He also asked about Riley."

"Fuck!"

"Well, not so much asked about, but mentioned him."

"He's done that a few times lately."

"I didn't know what to say."

"I don't know anymore either."

"Did you ever deal with him?" I asked, slightly irritated by the mere mention of the guy who wanted my family.

"I texted him that I would let him know when I was ready to talk and to please stop texting me."

"_When_ you're ready to talk?"

"Yes, Edward, _when_ I'm ready. I'm not getting into this with you again."

I opened my mouth to gripe, but the next words out of her mouth stole the words right away.

"So do you want to move in?"

"Wait...what?"

She smiled shyly.

"Did you just ask me to move in with you?"

She tucked her hair behind her ears and I could see the tips were all red. "Yeah."

"Like, all the way? Are you serious?"

"Like, take up half of my closet with all your shit serious," she joked.

I grabbed her by the back of the neck and pulled her to me.

"Are you done with work?" I asked breathlessly.

"I can be."

I stood up, bringing her with me. "Good, let's go to bed."

"Is that a yes?"

"That's an absolutely, motherfucking yes," I grinned.

XXXXXXXX

**A/N: So, yeah. Are you getting used to the fluff? Are you? LOL. We have a little drama headed our way and a certain little tart will be reappearing soon. You knew it was coming.**

**Reviews are always appreciated and you do know how I love to tease :o)**

**NEXT WEEK: We find out exactly what Cammy has been up to.**

**Oh, and UP has been nominated for TWO Hidden Star Awards. Best Kiss and Best All Around Story. Thank you to whomever nominated me. **

******ALSO: This is being added after the update b/c I got the notice this morning. ;-D UP was also nominated for The Twinklings Walk of Fame Mistress of Mystery award. The link is also on my profile so you can see the other nominees too. Again, thank you to whomever nominated me. **


	24. The Other Point of View

**AN: ****Thanx to everyone who is reading, reviewing, alerting, and favoriting. I got a whole bunch of new followers on twitter too so thank you to all of you as well.**

**Thank you to Mel for pre-reading and Mollie for beta'ing and making this and every chapter better than I ever expected.**

**If you see me rec'd somewhere, please let me know. I'm always wondering.**

**I would call this a transition chapter, but there's still a lot going on. Again, this story is rated M for a reason. **

**Stephenie Meyers owns everything Twilight. I own Cammy and her psychotic tendencies. LOL.**

XXXXXX

Chapter 22: The Other Point of View

BPOV

Holy Shit! If I had been told three months ago that I'd be such an insatiable nympho, I would have laughed. Not just laughed, but probably rolling on the floor, huge gasping breaths, not so sexy guffawing, laughed. It's not that I didn't enjoy sex, I did, but I had no idea that it could even come close to what Edward and I had done. And I wanted more. More, more, more.

I was really nervous when he asked me if I trusted him. I didn't know what he was going to do, but I knew that he wouldn't hurt me. I had no doubt in that. And there was something about the way that he held me and touched me that made me crave the rawness of being fucked. Passionately fucked. And as hard as he pounded into me, his grip remained gentle, making me feel secure.

I was getting tired of the fucking condoms though. I had an IUD in place, so me getting pregnant again wasn't an issue; although, when he slipped up about Charlie having brothers or sisters, my heart did a little dance. I always wanted more children, but had never been in a place where I was actually actively thinking about them. Now that he had planted that thought permanently in my brain I couldn't help but dwell. I found myself wanting to give him the experience. It would never make up for all he missed out on during my pregnancy with Charlie or his birth, but it would go a long way in helping us heal.

I tried really hard not to think about how different things would have been in the delivery room if I had told Edward. It was usually at night, when I had little else to distract my thoughts, that I was unable to hold back the floodgates of emotion; and I let myself cry.

I didn't know what the future held for us. I did, however, know that I wanted to be with him and I wanted Charlie to always have his daddy around. But when that envelope arrived announcing his interview with Columbia, I couldn't help but be worried. New York City was on the other side of the country.

There was no way that I would allow him not to go. It wasn't an option for him to stay here simply because of us. We would figure it out. We would make it work.

I went into work on Monday to find Luke sitting at my desk. When I approached him with what I'm sure was a curious look on my face, he smiled nervously.

"Everything okay?" I asked, opening up the bottom drawer and setting my purse inside.

He stood up to relinquish my chair. "Uh, yeah."

Somehow I didn't believe him. "Why don't I believe you?" I asked skeptically.

"I had a confrontation with Cammy this weekend. She was trying to get me all riled up and it worked. I almost completely lost the plot."

I grimaced. "That bad, huh?"

He nodded. "Yeah, uh, she told me that she, um..."

Understanding hit me hard. "She told you that she slept with my boyfriend."

Luke's frown deepened. "Yeah. You knew?"

I nodded. "Yeah. I found out on Friday."

Luke just stared, waiting for me to continue. When I didn't he decided to ask.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I shrugged. I was trying to be nonchalant about it, but truth be told, I was still really irked by it. Yes, I hated that he had run off and fucked some random chick as a response to finding out I had had his child, but I was more bothered by the fact that it had been Cammy. She was fucked in the head and I had a strong suspicion that she was doing something illegal. I just had no proof. And she was going to rub my face in it, I just knew it. I wasn't looking forward to her vicious brand of torture. "We weren't together when it happened and we've talked about it. We're good."

That's all he was getting.

"I changed her schedule."

My head snapped up to look at him. Was he serious?

"She's not going to let up on you, Bella and like I said last week, I can't lose you. She's got some insane notion that you and I are having an affair and she's on the war path. I told her she's not to come in while you are here. She'll work Tuesdays, Thursdays and the occasional Saturday."

I nodded my head in relief. At least I wouldn't have to spend all day getting insulted and bullied.

"I'm assuming you told her that she was wrong?"

"I did, but she doesn't believe me."

I looked at Luke, trying to read his expression. He appeared pretty apologetic. "I'm sorry, Bella. I never intended for this to happen. I made a mistake and now you're paying for it. I made it really clear that she was to stay away from you. I'll do everything I can to make sure you don't have to deal with my shit."

"Is she threatening you?"

"Of course, she's threatening me," he sighed. "I could lose my license for sleeping with her and she knows that."

"That's why you can't fire her."

Luke closed his eyes and shook his head. "I'm a fucking idiot."

I stayed silent. I didn't disagree, but I was certainly not one to pass judgment on making mistakes.

Tuesday morning, I started my period. Of course, when Edward and I were finally at a point where not only did we want to tear each other's clothes off and fuck like animals, but we actually could act on it, my monthly 'gift' would appear. At my six week post-natal appointment I had discussed birth control options with my OB. Since I was nursing, she recommended a non-hormone form of birth control. I didn't want to deal with pills or shots, so I opted for the Paragard IUD. Unfortunately, it made my period go from three to four days to around six days.

Edward said he didn't care, that we could do it in the shower if I didn't want to make a mess. He actually seemed quite turned on by the idea, but it was a little scary for me. I just wasn't ready for that. Not yet anyway.

Instead, I spent a lot of time either on my knees or between his legs in some way. Sucking, stroking, licking. Yeah, I was becoming an expert at the art of the blow job, or at least the art of giving Edward Cullen a blow job. Finding out his likes, his dislikes, and his "Holy fuck, I'm gonna fucking cum!" triggers had become my mission.

True to Luke's word, I did not see Cammy for the rest of the week. I didn't know how to approach Luke about finding out more about her. It seemed morbid and masochistic, but if she had something on Edward, she could be dangerous. I had no idea what she was capable of. At one point, I even sunk to rummaging around her desk, pretending to be looking for an article that I needed. I was looking for anything that could tell me...well anything. I found very little, apart from an envelope addressed to a Camille Jenks. There was no address, no other personal information, just her name. At least, I assumed that was her name.

Edward had been spending every single night in my bed. The feeling over having him wrap his whole body around mine the second I climbed into bed was both comforting and annoying. He was one of those hot sleepers. The kind whose body temperature seems to rise way too many degrees when they fall asleep. I very quickly overheated and if he fell asleep before me, I had trouble escaping.

I did love having him there though. We never really discussed what his staying there meant. I worried how Charlie would react. He loved his daddy and I knew that. He had also seen us being exceptionally affectionate, but how would he feel if he walked in one night and found Edward and I in bed together? Would he freak out? He hadn't climbed into my bed with me in weeks, but I knew that it would happen again at some point. We needed to talk to him about it.

Edward received another interview invitation on Thursday, this one to Duke. Duke. As in North Carolina, Duke. Shit. I knew he had sent in those applications a while ago and that's why he was getting his invitations from them first, but it still made me all sorts of nervous. I didn't tell him that though.

Over the weekend we made our way back to Mrs. Jane's house. She had been so excited when Edward called to ask if we could bring Charlie over.

When we got to the door, Edward lifted Charlie up to reach the brass knocker. Charlie grasped it and let it drop.

"You have to do it harder than that, baby," I laughed.

"Are you talking to him or me?" Edward waggled his eyebrows.

"You'll know when I'm talking to you," I smirked.

"Dully noted."

Charlie grabbed onto the knocker again and this time he slammed it against the door good and hard.

"Atta boy," Edward said, setting him down and grinning proudly.

We waited for a few moments and then the door creaked open. Mrs. Jane stood in front of us with a gracious smile on her face.

"Oh, I'm so happy that you came back," she said looking between Edward and I. And then her gaze lowered, and lowered, and lowered. I knew the moment that her eyes landed on Charlie because her face registered surprise, awe, and excitement. Not surprised to see him, but the same surprise everyone who knew Edward had when they saw how much Charlie looked like him.

"And who do we have here?" she asked, bending a little.

Charlie leaned back and grabbed onto my leg, burying his face against my thigh.

"Oh, you're shy?"

Charlie nodded. Edward and I both snorted.

"Don't let him fool you Mrs. Jane. Give him twenty minutes and he'll be running around this house like he owns the place," I chuckled.

"Oh will you?"

I tried to walk, but just like every other time that he did that, I couldn't do it without a whole lot of effort. "Charlie, baby, I can't walk. I need you to let go."

Charlie shook his head. Edward fixed the problem by lifting him up into the air and onto his shoulders. "I got this."

Mrs. Jane backed into the house and Edward followed, ducking down so that Charlie's head wouldn't hit the top of the door frame. I put my hand on the small of Edward's back and closed the door behind me.

Charlie was looking around, his mouth open.

"I have some cookies that need to be frosted," Mrs. Jane said, looking up at Charlie. "Do you know of anyone who might want to help me?"

Charlie nodded, licking his lips.

"Oh, goodness, you mentioned food," I laughed.

Edward pulled Charlie down.

"Who do you think would help me?" Mrs. Jane asked him.

"Me," Charlie said in a timid voice.

"Do you like cookies?"

He nodded again.

"Well, why don't you follow me and we can do it together."

She reached her hand out and Charlie took it. He looked up at me and I nodded with a smile, reassuring him that it was okay. We had started talking to Charlie about strangers. I'm not sure how much he really understood, but he was shy enough at first that I didn't think he would go with anyone he didn't know.

Edward wrapped his arm around my waist as Mrs. Jane and Charlie disappeared into the kitchen. "Wanna come with me?" He asked kissing the side of my head.

"I'm not having sex with you in Mrs. Jane's house, Edward," I joked.

He scoffed. "What kind of pervert do you think I am?"

"I know exactly what kind of pervert you are," I giggled.

"I still have a few tricks up my sleeve."

I hummed. "Where are we going?"

"I have something I want you to hear."

"Yeah?"

He nodded and led me into the conservatory. When we got to the piano room, he pointed towards the lounging area. "Sit," he ordered. "Relax."

"I am relaxed."

"Relax some more."

I did as he told and sat down, crossing my legs and spreading my arms out over the back of the sofa. I closed my eyes and heard the piano bench scoot across the floor. A minute or so later, a gentle melody started flowing through the room. It was soft and sweet and a little bit curious. I had obviously heard Edward play before, but never like this. Every note was perfectly placed. The music began to speed up and I opened my eyes to watch him. His fingers were dancing across the keys fluidly and I noticed that he wasn't reading any music. I watched, completely intoxicated by his passion. The music took a dark turn; an anguished turn. I could hear it; I could feel it. And I could see it on his face. His expression was pained, his eyes glazed over. And then the tune turned somber, accepting. Finally, the notes turned peaceful, playful, and I don't know how he did it, but they even sounded a little sexy.

His fingers slowed as he brought the melody to a close. I didn't even have to ask what that had been. That was our story; our past and our present and maybe even a little bit of our future.

When he stopped playing, he dipped his head, resting his chin on the chest. I stood up and put my hands on his shoulders before sliding them down and over his chest. When I pulled them back up I grabbed his jaw and tilted his head back so that I could kiss his mouth.

"That was beautiful," I murmured against his lips.

He turned his body and pulled me into his lap. "I told you." He kissed my neck and I tilted my head for better access.

"You told me what?"

"I told you that I have loved you for a long time."

I ran my fingers through his hair from the nape up his neck upwards. "I believe you."

"I'm glad, because that is the best way for me to express it to you."

"Have you added to it or is all of that what you had written before?"

"I've been adding for the last several weeks. Charlie's been listening to it for me."

I felt his mouth open against the skin just below my ear and his tongue swept over my flesh lightly. I might have moaned a little.

"Is he a good critic?" I asked, trying not to let my voice shake.

"Very good," Edward mumbled, his hand sliding into the neckline of my dress. His fingertips caressed my nipple over the top of my bra.

"Are you really feeling me up in Mrs. Jane's conservatory?" I giggled.

"Mmmhmm."

"Are you concerned at all about getting caught?"

"Nope."

"Why?" He was all too assured of himself.

I felt my body vibrate a little as his laughter escaped. "I asked her to give me half an hour with you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Mmmmm," was his response as he continued to grope me. His hand slid down my side, over my hip, and to my knee before working its way back up between my legs. He pressed his palm against my core and I gasped a little.

"Edward!"

"Don't worry about it. We've got at least fifteen minutes before they get here and if I know Mrs. Jane, probably another ten on top of that," he assured. "Mrs. Jane will make lots of noise to let us know that they are approaching."

"I already told you I'm not having sex with you here."

"I'm not trying to have sex with you. I just want to make out a little," he grinned.

I wanted to argue with his logic, but I couldn't. My mind was a complete puddle of mud with him rubbing me the way that it was.

I did manage to push his hand back out from underneath my dress. "Hands above the waist then, Mr. Cullen."

He chuckled lightly and grabbed my chin, rubbing his nose against mine before placing a gentle kiss on my lips; then another; then another. He deepened the kiss, lavishing my tongue with all sorts of affections.

I was lost to him in that moment. Forgetting where we were, only that I was in his arms and he was making my head feel like it was about to disconnect itself from my body.

I must have been making some sort of noises because Edward suddenly started laughing.

"I'm sorry, I've just never heard you make that sound before," he snorted.

"What sound?" I asked, slightly offended.

"I don't know. I can't describe it."

I scoffed. "You're imagining things."

"No, I'm not. Seriously, it was almost like a high pitched purring sound."

"Shut up," I said, trying not to smile.

I shifted off of his lap and stood to straighten myself up so that I looked and felt appropriate.

"How are you going to get rid of that before Mrs. Jane gets back here?" I laughed, pointing at his very obvious erection.

He looked down and adjusted himself. "I've got a particularly nasty series of images that should take care of it. Just give me a few minutes."

"I see." I sat back down on the sofa. "Play something else for me?"

Edward was still playing when Mrs. Jane came in carrying a tray with three tea cups, a tea pot, a glass of milk, and several icing overloaded cookies on it. Sure enough, I heard her long before I saw her. She was talking in a loud, dramatic voice, but lowered it when she saw that we were not in a compromising position; at least, not anymore. Charlie was bouncing up and down behind her, obviously extremely excited about his work.

"Wow, those look amazing," I said enthusiastically.

"I did that," Charlie grinned.

"And you did a fabulous job, love," Mrs. Jane cooed at him.

We talked and snacked for a while before Charlie stood up and started examining the piano. He looked down at his hands and then proceeded to wipe them on his pants before climbing onto the bench. He ghosted his fingers over the keys and then looked back at Edward, silently asking for permission to touch. This was something that Edward had taught him recently. Never touch a piano without asking first.

Once getting his approval, he went on to play a few songs that Edward had taught him. Mrs. Jane's eyes lit up, her mouth curving into an amazed and appreciative smile as we listened to him play. The songs were simple and crude, but absolutely perfect in their own way.

When Edward went to join him on the piano bench, Mrs. Jane rested her hand on my knee.

"In all my years, I don't believe I have ever seen anything quite as extraordinary as that man and his son," she whispered so that only I could hear her.

"What do you mean?" I asked curiously, turning to face her.

"Well it is obvious that they are father and child, you would have to be blind not to see that, but there is something there, some connection between them that cannot be simply due to their genetic relations."

I glanced over and watched as Edward moved Charlie's fingers into position on the keys.

"The emotion in his eyes every time he looks at that boy of his or hears his name is so intense it hurts. I feel it in my bones."

I didn't question what she meant. I had seen it so many times before that I understood perfectly.

"It rivals the way he looks at you, dear," she smirked.

I covered her hand with mine and leaned my head against her shoulder. Mrs. Jane was so warm, so caring. Part of me wished we never had to leave her. But unfortunately, we did.

"We should probably be heading out," I said, standing up and rubbing my hand on Edward's forearm. "Charlie needs to take a nap this afternoon."

He looked up at me and nodded. "Come on, Charlie, it's time to go home."

"I don't wanna go." It was a statement. It wasn't a whine, it wasn't a cry. Hmmm, this could get interesting.

How did I know? I knew my son. He would whine and cry and fuss when he didn't get his way or he didn't want to do something, but it was on rare occasions that he dug his heels in, and those occurrences always started out with a statement.

"I know you don't, buddy, but you need to get some food in your belly and take a nap." Edward wasn't alarmed...yet. He didn't see what was coming. I think that Mrs. Jane saw it though. She looked over at me with wide eyes and a knowing smile.

"I don't need a nap," Charlie whined, tears welling up in his eyes.

"Yes, you do."

"No."

"Charlie." Edward warned.

Charlie crossed his arms over his chest and stuck his nose in the air, all the while refusing to look at Edward.

I opened my mouth to scold him, but felt Mrs. Jane's hand on my arm.

"Let's see how he handles this," she whispered, nodding at Edward who was looking at Charlie with a furrowed brow.

"Come on, buddy." Edward went to put his hand on Charlie, but the little guy jerked away and scowled at Edward.

Edward looked over at me. "It's all you," I said, opening up my hands in surrender.

You would have thought I'd drowned his puppy with the look he gave me. He obviously did not want to have to scold Charlie, much less in front of Mrs. Jane.

Instead, he reached out and swooped Charlie into his arms. "This is not open for debate, we're leaving and you're coming with us."

Charlie started thrashing around in Edward's arms, trying to break free.

"I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go," he chanted over and over again while he squirmed and wiggled.

Edward's eyes met mine and I could see that he was not comfortable, but I couldn't bring myself to intercede. This is something that was part of being a parent and he was going to have to get used to the more difficult behavior. It's not like it came so frequently, but he still needed to know that he could do it.

Charlie was hitting out blindly, landing a few tiny little punches on Edward's face and chest as we walked through the conservatory and into the main house. I could hear Mrs. Jane chuckling to herself beside me as we walked arm in arm.

Edward got Charlie into his seat, but the little bugger managed to unbuckle himself three times before Edward laid the smack down.

"Charlie, knock it off," Edward said, raising his voice. "Either stop unbuckling yourself or you won't be able to touch the piano for a week."

"Never?" Charlie cried, his eyes full of panic.

"Not at all."

"Ever?"

Edward looked back at me.

"He has no idea how long a week is," I explained quietly. He turned back.

"Please, just behave yourself," Edward begged. "We'll come back soon, I promise."

I don't know if Charlie heard the desperation in his daddy's voice or what, but he nodded his head and allowed Edward to buckle him in one last time. Both Edward and I kissed Mrs. Jane goodbye and she ducked into the car to plant one on Charlie's cheek as well.

The trip home was almost completely silent. Edward's brow was furrowed and his jaw tight. I put my hand on the back of his neck and started scratching in an attempt to calm him, but I could see that he was upset by Charlie's temper tantrum and trying very hard to hide it.

It wasn't until that evening that I finally approached him about it. After putting Charlie to bed, I went into the bedroom and found Edward sitting on the edge of the bed, his elbows resting on his knees, his head in his hands.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He looked up at me and sighed. "What's there to talk about?"

"Hmmm, I don't know, maybe surviving your very first major Charlie meltdown?"

"Is that what I did?"

"You did fine, Edward."

"I yelled at him." The corners of his mouth were turned down. He looked so upset. I needed to help him understand that it was all part of parenting.

"You raised your voice, yes, but you handled it well. Sometimes it happens. He wasn't listening, he wasn't behaving. It's not going to be the last time, trust me."

"I don't want to do that again."

I sat down next to him. "I can't guarantee that it won't happen again."

"I feel horrible."

"You want me to make you feel better?"

Edward's head tilted, his gorgeous green eyes meeting mine. "And how would you go about doing that?" he asked with a curious grin.

I slid over a little closer to him and set my hand on his upper thigh. "I'm sure we can think of something," I purred.

Edward wasted no time pulling me into his lap, my knees on either side of his legs.

"Are you uh, uh..." he looked down and motioned towards my crotch.

I lifted my eyebrows. He was so fucking cute when he was embarrassed.

"Are you asking if I'm all done with my period?" I laughed.

His cheeks tinged pink. "Uh, yeah."

"Why yes, I am. Thanks for asking," I teased.

I felt his hands tighten on my hips. We hadn't made love all week and I was dying to get his cock inside of me. I pushed him back and he moved both of us towards the headboard.

I unbuttoned his jeans and sat back on my heels as he wiggled his way out of both them and his boxers. Stripping my dress up over my head, I was left in my red satin bra and panties.

I retrieved a condom from the drawer and ripped open the package.

"When are you going in for your test?" I grumbled as I slid the latex over his swollen cock.

His mouth was open and his tongue darted out to lick his lips as I put pressure on him.

"Uh, oh, uh..." he stuttered. "Whe...whenever you wa...want me to."

"Tomorrow?" I asked sweetly, wrapping my hand around him and pumping lazily.

"Yeah," he choked, ever so slightly moving his hips against my hand.

"Good," I whispered, removing my hand from him and discarding what was left of my clothing.

Edward pulled off his shirt and watched me as I returned to my position. He went to move me, but I stopped him.

"I want to ride you."

And cue the sexy crooked Edward Cullen smile. "By all means, baby," he said lying back down and throwing his hands behind his head as though getting ready for a show.

If he wanted a show, I'd give him a show. I lifted myself up onto my knees and dragged my hands up my sides. I pulled my hair out of the ponytail that it was in letting it cascade over my shoulders and down my back. Edward's tongue darted out, wetting his full bottom lip and I felt that familiar stirring between my legs. I brought my hands to my breasts, gripping them firmly, pushing them together and scraping my nails over the tops as I allowed them to fall back into place. I stuck one of my fingers in my mouth, wetting it thoroughly before trailing it down my body towards where he was waiting to enter me. I swirled it around my clit a few times, never taking my eyes off Edward, whose own eyes were glued to what I was doing.

I gripped his cock and circled it around my opening, teasing both him and myself with what was to come. Pun absolutely intended. Finally, I slid him in, easily, almost reverently.

"You fit perfectly," I whispered as I began to rock my hips back and forth against his.

"Ah...so tight, so good," he grunted, his hands making their way to the back of my neck. He pulled me down for what I assumed would be a kiss, but apparently he got distracted and his mouth found my sensitive nipple.

_Two can play at this game._

As he licked and suckled at my breast, I stuck my thumb down to where we were connected, wetting it with my arousal, and brought it back up to his nipple, the pierced one, and started rubbing my own little circles.

Edward hissed and let go of my breast as he realized what I had just done. His mouth let out a whole bunch of garbled noises and he started thrusting up to meet me.

He wouldn't last long, I knew it, but to sweeten the pot, I leaned down and traced his barbell with my tongue, tasting myself, before sucking it into my mouth

"Holy, motherfucking shit, Bellllllllaaaaaa." His face scrunched up, his jaw clenched and his hips froze mid thrust as his surprise orgasm completely consumed him.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck."

I loved watching him cum, especially when it was unexpected and intense. The fact that I had done that to him gave me a sense of power. It was thrilling.

Once he had come back down, he relaxed a little bit. He opened his eyes and grinned.

"Give me two seconds to clean up and I'll take care of you," he promised.

I wasn't concerned. Did I want to cum? Absolutely. But if I didn't, the feeling that he had given me by allowing me to see him do that, would tide me over.

I climbed off of him and watched as he wandered, naked at as a jaybird, to the bathroom. His ass was fucking gorgeous. I wanted to lick it. Not the actual ass part, cause that would have been kinda gross, but I definitely wanted to run my tongue over those chiseled cheeks.

I was jolted from my ass fantasy when he turned around and I was graced by an even better one. A still semi-erect penis walking towards me. It wouldn't take me long to get that bad boy back at attention.

Edward cleared his throat. I met his amused eyes and blushed.

_Yes, my love, you just caught me staring at your glorious cock, now bring it back over here and make me scream._

I must say, the man did not disappoint. He covered my body with his own and rolled us so that I was, once again, situated on top of him. I furrowed my brow in question.

"I like to watch your tits bounce," he shrugged.

I may or may not have added a little extra umpf to my motions as he gripped my hips and helped me get to where I needed to be. And in the process, he was once again taken off guard when he exploded shortly after I did.

"Shit, I owe you an orgasm," he breathed as I rocked us out of our bliss.

"Shut-up," I smacked him playfully. "You give me more than enough."

"You gave me twelve this week, while I gave you none. I owe you."

_Twelve? Really?_

"You were counting?"

"Uh huh."

"That seems like a lot."

"Depends on who you're asking," he joked.

"Do you feel better now?" I cooed, lifting myself off of him. I sucked in a little air through my teeth at the sensitivity of my nether regions and settled down next to him, lying my cheek against his chest.

He laughed, making my head bounce with the vibrations.

"What was I upset about again?"

I smiled and nuzzled in closer. "No idea, babe."

XXXXX

The following week Edward got a letter from Harvard. Of course he'd get an invitation from there. He was a legacy and an alumni. Plus, there were a good many staff members who already knew him. That one hit me a little harder than the others. He had roots there; friends. People who loved him and supported him; who were a part of his life while I hid his son from him; robbing him of his own flesh and blood.

These moments didn't come as often now. The moments when I would sit back and rip myself apart for all the bad decisions that I had made. But they still came. As painful as it was I had to remind myself of those words I said to Edward in the beginning. I did the best that I could with the information that I had. He had his life, his girlfriend, and an acceptance to do his undergraduate degree at an Ivy League college. I never expected him to be the father that he now was. How could I have? I believed that he wanted nothing to do with me, that he hated me. I wanted him to be happy and I never believed that he could be that with me and Charlie, especially if he gave up his dreams for us.

As those letters kept arriving I swore that I would do anything and everything that I could do to make sure he didn't give up his dreams. I had no idea what that would entail, but it didn't matter.

Edward called all three schools and arranged for his interviews to be held in the same week so that he wouldn't have to keep travelling back and forth. He would be heading out two days after Halloween. I had less than two weeks to prepare myself.

Halloween, shit. I was going to have to figure out a costume for Charlie. His pre-school was having a little festival and they requested a "non-scary" costume. I had to ask for clarification on the request, because some kids could be afraid of clowns, or dogs. His teacher, Miss Bobbi laughed at me. Apparently, they just meant no blood or gore or scary zombie masks. Huh. I wasn't aware that toddlers wore such costumes, but I suppose that it was a good rule to have. On top of that, Emmett had begged me to let him take Charlie trick-or-treating. He already had his costume all planned out. Emmett, not Charlie. How could I deny a twenty-four year old man with dimples who was on his knees and batting his eyelashes with his hands clasped together? Yeah, I lost that battle really fast. Rose just laughed at me and shook her head. She knew full well her husband's charms.

I gave up trying to find out any info on Cammy. Luke was less than forthcoming. I don't know if he didn't want to tell me or if he didn't know. He said he really didn't know that much about her, only what was on her resume. They had rarely spent any time at her apartment and she had lied to him about so much, he didn't know what was truth and what were lies.

I didn't get any indication that she was out for blood. I had four hang ups on my phone from an unknown number and I had gotten a dent in my car in the parking lot, but those could have come from anywhere.

I did ask my dad if there was any way to do a background check on her. I didn't tell him why though. He said that he could do one, but wouldn't until I told him what was up. I would have told him, but I didn't want to put Edward in that position. If they found out something on her and raided her apartment, who knows what they would find. Even though it was out of my dad's jurisdiction, they would have extended him professional courtesy. If my dad found out what Edward did, he'd be mad at him all over again. They had been on civil terms, my dad never fully accepting him, but not giving him any shit. I did not want to rock the boat. For all our sakes.

Most of the weekend was relaxing and uneventful; it rained all day on Saturday. Charlie, Edward and I spent it in our pajamas, lounging around the house, building forts, and eating pancakes and sausage for lunch.

And then came Sunday. The night that a monumental decision came spilling out of my mouth without previous thought. I was so trying to avoid a discussion with Edward about Riley that my mouth starting talking without my brain approving the words first.

Not that I regretted asking Edward to move in. I just wish it had been done in a different way. Too many of our huge discussions took place as a result of Riley's influence and I had done it once again.

As we made love that night, I pushed all thoughts of my lost friend out of my head to deal with another day. Edward was my future and I didn't intend to ever risk that, but I couldn't just ignore the one person who had supported me unconditionally for four years. Well, it had seemed unconditional at the time. I didn't know any more.

Edward didn't want to waste any time moving in, but we absolutely had to discuss it with Charlie first. When we woke in the morning, we sat him down during breakfast.

"Charlie," Edward started. "Do you remember yesterday when you asked me if I lived here?"

Charlie nodded, stuffing a bite of oatmeal into his mouth.

"Would you like it if I did live here with you and Mommy?"

"Yeth," he grinned with his mouth full of goo.

"Maybe we should wait until he's not eating," I grimaced. I hated it when anyone talked with their mouths full and was determined to teach my son not to, but I couldn't very well scold him for doing it since we were asking him questions while he ate.

Charlie swallowed and took a huge swig of his milk before he opened his mouth again. "Will Auntie Alice make your room into a junga too?"

Edward snorted. "No, buddy. Uh, I would, I would be staying in mommy's room with her."

Charlie looked at me and then back at Edward. I couldn't read the look on his face.

"Wike I did when we wived wif Grampa?" he finally asked.

"Exactly like that," I said, blowing out a puff of air. Relief flooded over me that he didn't start asking questions about Edward having his own bed. Now at least I knew that he understood that we would be sharing a bed.

"Okay," he shrugged and dug into his bowl for another huge bite of his breakfast.

I looked over at Edward. He looked just as relieved as I felt.

Not wanting to waste any more time, Edward started packing up boxes as soon as he got home from work as Charlie helped him.

A few days later Edward took the morning off , as did Esme, to finish bringing over the last of his things.

After two hours, I was getting a little agitated. Box after box littered the apartment. Edward's clothes were sprawled out over the bed, and since it had rained the night before, he had tracked mud all over the floor.

I was on my hands and knees trying to scrub a particularly stubborn spot out of the carpet when Edward brought in about the fiftieth box. This one was huge.

"What the hell is all that?" I asked groaning. I had no idea he had so much stuff.

"It's my stuff," he grinned.

"Uh, I see that," I said, standing up and pointing at the label on the box that read Edward's stuff.

"How much more 'stuff' do you have?"

He set the box down on the table and grabbed my waist. "You wanna see more of my stuff?" he whispered huskily in my ear.

I slapped his shoulder. "You and your dirty mind."

He let me go, laughing and picked the box back up.

"Seriously, Edward, we don't have that much more room."

"I've got one more after this, chill out woman."

I blew out a loud breath, causing a piece of hair that had fallen into my face to flutter around and then settle back down where it had started. I pushed it back behind my ear.

Charlie bounded in carrying a stuffed black and brown dog.

"What is that, sweetie?" I asked curiously.

"I founded it in Daddy's room."

Edward swaggered out from the master bedroom. "What did you find, buddy?" he asked.

"Dis." Charlie held up the tattered old dog.

"Oh my God, I haven't seen that in years," Esme gasped walking into the living room.

"What is it?" I looked over at Edward. He was actually blushing, like he was embarrassed.

"That was Edward's woofy," Esme cooed. Grinning wildly at him.

"Your...'woofy'?"

"Zip it, you," he growled at me playfully, bending down to Charlie's height.

"That, Charlie, was my favorite toy in the whole wide world when I was your age."

"Reawy?"

"Really."

"I took him everywhere with me. I slept with him. I even think I took him into the bath once or twice."

Charlie's eyes lit up and he looked up at me, but then frowned. He bit his lip and kissed the little dog before handing it to Edward.

"Here, Daddy, he's your woofy."

Edward pursed his lips. It was like his mouth didn't know what it wanted to do. It was tilted downwards, but I could see there was a hint of a smile there too.

He took the dog from Charlie's grasp, stared at it for a moment and then kissed it, just as Charlie had before handing it back to him.

"Would you like to take care of him for me?"

The grin that spread across Charlie's face could have lit up half of Washington state. I looked up at Esme who was watching the interaction with watery eyes and a smile.

She met my gaze and I couldn't help but smile back at her. This was Edward at his finest. It was those little intimate moments with Charlie. Sometimes the two of them acted as if there were no one else in the room and my heart felt so warm and so full.

"Thank you, Daddy," Charlie nodded taking back the offered dog. "He can be friends wif Bluey."

Edward laughed. Bluey was the little blue dog that Charlie took everywhere with him. It had been a gift from Riley, not that I would tell Edward that. But I wasn't about to take that thing away from him and break his little heart simply because I had fucked up.

Edward stood up and ruffled Charlie's hair right before Charlie disappeared down the hallway, presumably to introduce Woofy and Bluey.

"You do realize that he inherited your hair, right? The more you do that, the crazier it's going to get."

Edward smirked. "Yeah. I do. I hear that he has a girlfriend at school, maybe she likes it that way."

I tried to glare at him, but I couldn't. Charlie's teacher had told us that a little girl in the pre-school class had been following Charlie around for the last couple of weeks calling him 'her prince'. She even kissed him. When I asked how Charlie responded, she said that he simply smiled and handed her the toy that he was holding.

"I'm gonna go get the last box," Edward said, kissing first me, on the lips, and then Esme, on the cheek."

I looked around the living room at the boxes that were scattered.

"What does he have in there?" I mused out loud.

"Edward's a closet pack rat, obviously," Esme chuckled. "He's kept all sorts of things."

I opened up one of the boxes thinking that maybe I could start packing things away. The first one held shoe boxes and when I opened the top of one, I gasped.

Sitting on the top of a pile was a picture of me. I couldn't have been more than fourteen at the time and I was sticking my tongue out at the camera. I pulled it out and studied it. I didn't remember having it taken. The next one that I noticed was a picture of me and Alice. We were at the local swimming pool when we were about twelve and Emmett was threatening to push us in. That was the summer after I moved here. I remember that because he actually did push me in, but I clung to him and managed to bring him with me.

The next one was a group photo. We were older, maybe sixteen or seventeen. Alice, Rose and I were sitting on a picnic table bench, the boys were behind us, sitting on the table. Jasper was behind Rose, Emmett behind me, and Edward behind Alice. What stuck out for me though, was the fact that Edward was not looking at the camera like the rest of us were. He was looking at me.

"What are you looking at, sweetheart?" Esme asked, leaning over me.

I wordlessly handed her the pictures. "Wow." It was all she said. It was all she needed to say. There were more. There were lots more. Of me, of me and Alice, of just us girls, and the whole group together. I wasn't in all of them. Some of them just had Edward with Emmett or Alice. There were several with the whole family. But I was utterly stunned that he had any of me at all. Some of them I hadn't even seen before.

At that moment, Edward walked through the front door. He froze when he spotted his mother and I with the photos in our hands.

"Uh...What are you guys doing?" he asked.

I bit down hard on my lower lip. I had no idea if he would be mad at me for going through his things.

"I...I just thought I could try and put some things away," I stuttered.

Edward looked a little on edge. A little nervous, a little irritated. It was the kind of look a guy would give his mom or his girlfriend when they found his porn stash.

"I'm going to go see what Charlie's up to." Esme patted my arm and excused herself.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know what this was."

"Bella, I...I don't know what to say. I wasn't stalking you, I promise."

What?

"They're copies of the ones Alice had on her computer and in her photo album."

"Why do you have them?" I shoved my thumb nail into my mouth and bit down nervously.

"I, uh, I wanted to remember you the way you were, before I...before we..." Edward swallowed.

Oh!

"You took these after that?"

"When we moved. I took them off of her computer when we moved to the east coast. I never did anything with them, I just wanted them. I didn't think I'd ever see you again so I wanted to remember you like that."

He pointed to the photo that was on the top of the pile in my hand. It was one of me and Alice, sitting on the gate of my old Chevy truck, our arms intertwined, our eyes bright. We were laughing.

I dropped the pile of photos back in the box and pulled him to me, pressing my lips against his.

"I love you so much," I whispered, pressing my forehead against his. His arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer.

"When I took those, I never thought you'd love me back," he sighed.

"Mmmm, but I do."

"I know."

We stood there for a few minutes, just holding each other until we heard the pitter patter of little feet headed down the hallway.

"I'm hungry," Charlie announced, completely unaware of the moment Edward and I had just had.

I let go of Edward and reached my hand out to our son.

"Let's go get some lunch then, yes?"

XXXXXXX

Cammy POV

"Come on, baby, you ready to party?"

"What?"

"We're here. Let's get you out of those clothes."

I reached for his jacket and shoved it off his shoulders. His t-shirt was tight, showing off his defined arm muscles.

"I...I can't do this," he muttered.

"Of course you can, baby," I said, grabbing his cock through his jeans and rubbing him firmly. "You are more than ready to do this."

I could see the hesitancy in his face, but he was slipping. The longer I worked him, the less his resolve to push me away. Finally, he grunted and reached for me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him, licking at his bottom lip before diving into his mouth. His hands were all over the place at once. I felt them slip to the backs of my thighs and grinned. He was mine.

As I removed my tongue from his mouth and began dragging it over his scruffy jaw I felt his hands move higher, pushing my tight leather skirt up so that it bunched at my waist.

I allowed him to lift me up and wrapped my legs around his waist. I brought my hand to his cheek and smiled at him. I couldn't stop for long though or he might have regained his composure. I needed him worked up, horny, completely consumed with lust.

"I wanna feel that beard of yours scratching up my pussy, you think you can handle that?" I purred in his ear.

"Fuck!" he groaned as I ground myself against him.

It took me all of three minutes before we were naked on the living room floor, his face buried between my thighs. I wish more of them were up for eating pussy. Most of them were too eager to dip their wick.

_Jesus Christ he really knows what he was doing. Can I pick them or what?_

Minutes later, I found myself bent over the arm of my couch, being pounded into relentlessly.

He was moaning and grunting while I was screaming. They liked that. They all like that. Even if they didn't remember it the next morning, in the moment, they were fucking kings and I was their every fantasy.

I finally got him to the bedroom and turned on my little secret. This one would require extra footage. He would do anything to keep his little missus from discovering his mistake. There's no way she'd put up with his infidelity again. She'd take their kid and run.

He was sprawled out on his back on top of my bed, buck naked and hard as a rock. I grinned to myself.

_If they only knew._

His eyes were closed, but they popped open the moment I sank down onto him. He gripped my hips as rolled my them. I fully intended to do all of the work, but he flipped me quickly, lifted my legs up to his shoulders and thrust wildly until he released.

_Well that worked out better than I anticipated._

When it was all said and done, he collapsed, completely passed out. I took the mini DVD out of the camera and labeled it before shoving it into my souvenir box.

I felt no guilt as I laid myself back down beside him. I never did. These guys deserved it. Every single one of them. Attached men only go to bars after a fight when they're looking for an easy revenge fuck. Vince had taught me that.

_Motherfucking bastard._

So that's what I gave them. But I wasn't about to let them get off without paying some sort of consequence. Some I blackmailed into giving me things; money, cars, you name it, depending on their status or the strength of their relationship. Sometimes it took me months to do my research, but the fear in their eyes when I re-appeared in their lives, was worth it. Sometimes I would just send the evidence to their wives and girlfriends. I didn't need to see the reaction, just the knowledge that the fuckers were getting what they deserved was all I needed. Occasionally one would escape me or they'd break down and confess before I had a chance to bring them down. I growled at the thought. I might not be able to destroy them, but I could sure as hell make their lives a living hell.

I glanced over at the naked body next to me and smirked. Was I a bitch, undoubtedly, but I loved every minute of it.

XXXXXXX

**AN: So you got to see a little bit about what happened for Bella in the time that EPOV kind of skipped over including Charlie's meeting with Mrs. Jane. A LOT is going to be happening next chapter.**

**So what do you think about Cammy's POV? I don't know if I'll do it again, but it needed to be done. There's some info that would never come out reading in just E and B's POV.**

**Reviews are always appreciated.**

**NEXT WEEK: What happens when Edward goes out of town? **

**Rec: Through the Oak Door by struckatthesky: One kiss sparks the clues, but what do they all mean? Bella dreams of her future self, knowing the life she lives ends in tragedy. How can she change her story when she already knows the ending? The door is there, but where is the key? AH, ExB, Rated M**

**This one is a little creepy, but so well written. I highly recommend. :o)**


	25. A Little Patience

**A/N: Hello peoples. You are all still hanging in there with me. That's a good thing, b/c things are about to go all shades of crazy. **

**Thanks as always to my lovlies, Mollie and Mel, who did some extra special work with me this week. I have tons of news that I will post after the chapter.**

**For all those who are pimping me and UP, I can not thank you enough. ;o) **

**Oh, and the song: _Patience_ by Guns N' Roses. You have to listen to it when you get to the part. Trust me, it makes all the difference. I've linked youtube on my profile. :o)**

**I tinker after I get it back so any mistakes are all mine. **

**Do I really need to do another disclaimer? You all know who it belongs to and it isn't me. **

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 23: A Little Patience

BPOV

If Edward and I thought that moving in together would increase the time we spent as a family, we picked the wrong week to do it.

Life absolutely fucking exploded around us. Luke's computer had some sort of malfunction and erased two weeks' worth of data. We had the IT people on the phone for four hours trying to help us find a way to get it back only to be told we were out of luck. I still had a hard copy, but that meant at least three full days of re-entering all of the information; which meant extended days.

"God Damnit!" Luke yelled as he threw a dry erase marker across the room.

I startled, but responded without looking up from what I was doing. "Does it help to throw things?"

"Yes," he growled.

"Oh, then by all means."

"It's supposed to back up every Tuesday night. How the hell does it just decide to stop backing up?"

"I don't know, Luke, but it really doesn't matter at this point. Just sit your ass down and start inputting. Edward's coming back to get me at nine and I'm going home."

"Are you coming back tomorrow?"

I looked at him with an 'are you stupid' look. "Tomorrow's Thursday."

"I know, Bella, and I can tell her to stay in the Library, but I just can't get this all done in time without you."

I shook my head. "Give me what I can do from home and I will. Charlie's not in school tomorrow and Edward's going to be home in the morning. I'll skip the park and work all morning."

Luke gave a semi-relieved look and sat back down at his desk to work.

I was completely taken off guard when I heard a knocking a few hours later. Edward was standing over me, his fist pressed against the desk.

I smiled. "Hi," I said, letting out a breath.

He smiled crookedly. "You ready to go?"

"No, but I'm leaving anyway," I laughed without humor.

I stood up and grabbed my coat. "Oh, hey, Luke, this is Edward. Edward, this is my boss, Luke."

Luke threw out his hand and Edward met it firmly. I saw Luke flinch a little and knew that Edward was paying him back for ogling my chest. I tried to cover my smile with my hand.

"Sorry for keeping her like this," Luke apologized once Edward had let go. "She's my saving grace, I don't know what I'd do without her." He shook his hand out and shoved it down below the desk.

"Ditto," Edward said, throwing his arm over my shoulder and kissing my temple.

"Same. Have a safe drive. And Bella?" I turned to face him. "Thank you."

"No problem, Luke. Give me a buzz in the morning and we'll touch base."

"Will do."

Edward's arm slid down my back, his hand resting on my hip as he allowed me to exit in front of him. It was with just the slightest hint of territorialism and I had to bite my lip to keep from giggling.

"So what the hell happened?" he asked in the car on the ride home.

"I have no freaking clue. Luke's computer is supposed to back up once a week, but for some reason it hasn't been. We lost all the data input for the last two weeks. Not to mention the methods section that took him six days to perfect."

"Shouldn't he have a back-up somewhere else?"

"He did. He had a flash drive that he backs up every night, but he can't find it."

"What do you mean, he can't find it."

I shrugged. "He can't find it. I don't know. He said it should have been in his bag. It wasn't there. He checked everywhere. He even drove home to search his house before we started re-inputting all of the data, but...nothing."

"Fuck, that sucks."

"Yeah. You're telling me. How was your day?"

"Busy. You'd think there was some announcement on TV that they had found a cure for the common cold and the PA free clinic was the only place to go. It was a fucking madhouse."

"How was Charlie?"

"Fine. Carlisle was off so he went to pick him up. I made spaghetti with meatballs for dinner."

I grinned. "Oh yeah? How'd that work for ya?"

Edward scowled and looked sideways at me. I suppose I hadn't ever explained some of the rules of dinner to him. Never give a three-year-old pasta sauce and slurping noodles at the same time. Well, at least not our three-year-old. You're going to be finding sauce in hidden places on both of you for days.

"I think that white shirt my mom bought for him last week might be a goner."

I choked back a laugh. "You let him wear a white shirt while eating spaghetti?"

"You know, you could make me list of do's and don'ts."

"I could, but it's so much more fun this way," I snickered.

Charlie was asleep by the time we got home and I followed shortly, having absolutely no energy for sex. Edward offered to relieve my tension with his mouth, but I couldn't even muster up the drive for that. I'm pretty sure that falling asleep while my boyfriend's tongue was inside of me would be considered a huge sexual faux pas.

That's how the next two days went as well. Edward took Charlie to the park with Esme on Thursday morning so that I could work and then he spent the rest of the day in front of the television watching movies. I felt horrible about that, but sometimes that's just the way it had to be. Despite four cups of coffee, I fell asleep on the sofa before Edward even finished putting Charlie to bed. I did wake up in my own bed the next morning so he must have moved me at some point.

Edward had taken on such an active role with Charlie. He didn't seem afraid to do what needed to be done or to try new things. We had a become a right little family, doing what normal, healthy families did. I had learned to rely on him and found that I actually enjoyed having a partner in parenting. Something I had always been afraid of before. People probably never would have believed that we had started out on such unstable ground.

I had promised to take an hour to have lunch with Edward on Friday, but at eleven fifteen I got a phone call full of profanities.

"Someone broke into my motherfucking car!" He yelled frantically.

"Uh, what?" Was my brilliant response.

"My fucking car. Someone smashed in the window. The stereo's gone, the seats are torn to shreds. They even took Charlie's fucking car seat."

"Did you have anything important in there?"

"I don't know. I don't think so? Right now I'm too fucking pissed off to even remember."

"Did you call the cops?"

"Yeah, they're on their way. Fuck, Bella, I don't even think the thing is drivable. The steering wheel is all pulled out and hanging. There are wires everywhere. It even looks like someone tried to set it on fire."

"Holy shit. Are you okay?"

"Physically, yes. Mentally, if I ever find the fucker who did this, I'm going to rip him a part and burn the pieces."

"I'll call your mom and see if she can bring my car up. Just calm down and don't yell at the cops. It's not their fault and I don't want to have to bail you out of jail again."

The line was silent for a minute and then I heard Edward chuckle quietly. "Thanks a lot for that."

"Hmmm. I'll call you back in a few, okay?"

"Thanks, baby."

I hung up and rubbed my eyes. I couldn't help but smile to myself despite the situation. It was nice that we could joke about things that had once caused so much tension.

"What happened?" Luke asked from beside me.

"Someone broke into Edward's car. Took the stereo, the car seat, completely destroyed everything."

Luke grimaced. "Oh, crap!"

"Yeah. When it rains, it pours, and right now it feels like we're in the middle of a torrential downpour."

The rest of the afternoon went by at a snail's pace. I called Esme and she agreed to drive my car up to Edward. They would go get Charlie and run some errands before picking up Edward and then coming to get me.

The police had bagged and tagged everything they could from the car and then had it towed to their impound. They were going to do a second sweep and then Edward could decide if he wanted it towed to the local fix-it shop or to the scrap metal dump. Apparently whoever it was did more damage than Edward thought. The brake lines had been cut and something had been poured in the gas tank. A hooker who had been sitting just outside the clinic said she saw a guy in a dark hoodie and jeans peering in the windows, but that was all the lead they got.

When we got to the apartment, I sat down on the sofa and Edward collapsed practically on top of me. "This has been the shittiest week ever."

I ran my fingers through his hair. "Yep. It has."

"Please tell me it's over," he mumbled burying his face between my boobs.

I giggled. "Are you happy right there?"

He nodded and I didn't need to see his face to know that he was grinning. "Your body is my happy place."

"My body or my boobs?"

"Your whole damn body. Some places are happier than others, but right now, I'm good."

Charlie came into the room and stood next to where Edward and I were cuddling. Edward looked up as Charlie forced his way into my lap. The three of us sat together, Edward nuzzled into me and Charlie driving a little matchbox car all over the curves of his daddy's shoulders and head and occasionally onto me.

The next week was similar in craziness, although, we managed to avoid any huge disasters. Edward's car was a total loss. They would have had to replace too many vital parts, including the engine. I had no idea what had happened to it, but they said that if Edward had managed to actually get the car started, it could have exploded.

He managed to sell it to the scrap metal shop for about a thousand dollars. Apparently they were being generous, but considering it was a forty-thousand dollar car, I thought he got ripped off. The insurance company was offering him thirty-five, based on blue book value, plus a few extra hundred for the items that had been stolen out of it.

We planned to go shopping for a new one over the weekend.

Luke and I finally got caught up with all the work and he handed me an additional flash drive so that we both had a copy. I was to download everything that we had done at the end of every work day.

Saturday morning we headed over to my dad's place. Edward and my dad spoke quietly for a few minutes and I couldn't help but wonder what had transpired between them that they could speak in such an intimate manner. Their hands were still clasped from their handshake, but Dad's other hand was on Edward's shoulder and his head was bent in, listening and then speaking. He patted Edward on the shoulder firmly when they broke apart.

"What was that all about?" I asked as we headed to Seattle for the day to go look at a few car dealerships.

"What?"

"You and my dad?"

"Nothing. I asked him to check out a few things for me."

"About the car? What's he going to be able to see that the PA cops didn't?" I glanced at him, but since I was driving, I couldn't really see his expression.

"Don't worry about it, Bella, it's no big deal."

"What aren't you telling me?"

Edward grabbed my hand and kissed my knuckles. "If and when it becomes important, I will tell you. I don't want you to worry about anything right now, okay?"

I huffed, but agreed. "Do you know what Rose is planning to dress Charlie as for Halloween?"

"No, why would I know?"

I pursed my lips. "She won't tell me. I thought maybe Em would have said something to you."

"No," he grumbled. "He'll barely talk to me these days."

"That's weird."

"I know."

We went to the Volvo dealership, the Mercedes dealership and the BMW dealership. Edward absolutely refused to get a minivan.

"What exactly gave you the impression that I wanted a minivan?" I asked him with annoyed curiosity.

"Uh, I don't know. I was just...just making sure."

I shook my head. "It's your car, get what you want."

Edward hummed and pulled me into his side as we entered the first dealership.

Six hours later, we were heading home, Edward having purchased a BMW X5 in Deep Sea Blue Metallic with Leather seats and everything he could possibly want added in. I had to admit, it was a fucking beautiful car, but completely unnecessary. And $68,000. It was being shipped in from an out of state dealer and would be delivered just after Edward left for his interviews.

"What exactly gives you the impression that this car is going to be safer than your last one?" I asked as he signed the paperwork.

"Mrs. Cullen, the safety ratings are fantastic on this car," the salesman, Oscar, said assuredly.

Edward coughed out a laugh and covered his mouth with his hand. "Yeah, _Mrs. Cullen_, the ratings are amazing," he snickered.

I chose to ignore the jump in my heart rate at being called 'Mrs. Cullen' and focused on, or rather tried to focus on, what I had meant.

"I'm talking about the fact that your last car got completely vandalized and could have killed you."

"Oh, the X5 has a top of the line security system. It..."

"Thanks, Oscar," Edward said holding up a hand. "I can handle Mrs. Cullen from here, thanks. Can you give us a moment."

"Oh, yeah, sure." Oscar stood up and shut the door behind him.

Edward yanked me into his lap. "Do you think he'd mind if I fucked you on his desk?" he asked attacking my mouth with vigor.

"Uh, I don't know," I panted, trying to keep up. "But I think I would, since the blinds are wide open and I don't need all those men out there ogling my ass. Or any other part of my body. What the hell has gotten into you?"

Edward stopped kissing me and rested his head against mine. "Phewf. Ah, nothing. I just appreciate you thinking about the safety of the car, that's all."

I stared at him skeptically. "Yeah...right."

I slipped off his lap and back into my own seat just as Oscar knocked timidly on the door.

"Everything okay in here?" He looked a little pink in the face and slightly embarrassed. It was almost as if he had overheard our conversation.

I looked over at Edward and he nodded. "Mmmhmm. Let's get this show on the road."

XXXXXXXX

Halloween.

It always seems like such a good idea when you're a kid. You get to dress up like something you've always wanted to be. And then all you have to do is knock on a strangers door and they give you candy. As a teenager, it's a way to create a little mischief. To dress in skimpy little clothes and pretend that it's perfectly okay that your ass is handing halfway out and your boobs are on display for any and all the guys to fantasize about. It's a time to let loose and enjoy the forbidden alcohol that so and so stole from his parent's secret stash.

As a parent, it's a whole different story. It's a time to spend way too much money on a costume that they're only going to wear for one night. You have to worry about what sorts of creeps are hanging around watching your kid and what exactly may be in that candy that they're handing out. Then there's the whole idea of the candy itself. Charlie's three-years-old. I can give him one piece of candy and he's happy. Why does he need a fucking orange pumpkin bucket?

I stood at the sink in the main house, grumbling to myself as I poured myself a glass of water. I never went to prom so Alice insisted that Edward and I dress as though we were going together. The catch, it was like we just stepped out of 1986. The dress she had me wearing, she had picked up at a vintage shop in PA for $40. It was a bright pink one shouldered knee length dress. The one shoulder strap had ruffles and the neckline was sweetheart style. It was sequins from the neckline down to the hips where it had a slanted waistline. Some of the sequins were different colors making them look like roses. From the waistline down were ruffles. Three fucking tiers of ruffles. I don't even know why I let her talk me into dressing up. I was taking my kid trick-or-treating and then going home and trying to hide all the candy so that he didn't OD on sugar.

She didn't even try to talk me into heels though. Instead, she included a pair of matching flats that looked like ballet slippers that she had dyed. Whatever, the whole damn thing was going back to the shop when I was done.

I heard a high pitched sound and turned around just as Alice wandered into the room pulling Jasper behind her. She was dressed like a monkey. She was wearing a little brown body suit with a tan belly and she had a hood with two little ears peeking out the top. To finish it all off, she had a little tail. she looked like Curious George.

Jasper, oh my. Jasper was dressed as a giant banana.

I snorted...loudly. "Where are _you_ going?"

"Well, we're going with you first, and then we're going to a party for one of Jasper's colleagues," Alice grinned.

Jasper didn't look quite as happy. Edward chose that moment to come into the room. He stopped dead in his tracks and stared at Jasper and Alice.

"Holy shit!" He choked.

"Don't," Jasper warned.

I bit my lip as I watched Edward's face light up just before he barked out a laugh. He bent over. "Oh Fuck, Jazz, how did she talk you into that one?"

Alice scowled at Edward. "I did no such thing."

Jasper cleared his throat and looked at her accusingly.

"Okay, so I might have promised him a little something...as encouragement," she smiled sheepishly.

"Do I even want to know what that is?" Edward grimaced.

"No sir, you probably do not," Jasper said, waggling his eyebrows and sticking his tongue out through his teeth.

Edward covered his ears and approached me, pressing his face against my head.

"Make them stop," he pleaded.

I pulled away and appraised him. He was wearing a white tuxedo top and jacket with black slacks, and a pink cummerbund and bow-tie that matched my dress. On his feet were black and white Nike's.

He grinned. "Don't I look handsome?"

I coughed. "Oh, yeah, baby, you look hot," I attempted to feign seriousness.

"But, nothing compares to you," he crooned.

"Not quite the right decade, but close, sweetie," I said patting his cheek and stepping away.

Just then, Emmett walked into the room and nearly fucking lost it.

"Oh shit, Jazz. What did you let her do to you?"

"Shut the fuck up, _Peter_," Jasper taunted.

"Hey, at least I can fly."

"It's true to life," Rose smirked wrapping her arms around her husband. "He really is the boy who never grew up."

"Well, not yet anyway," Emmett smiled, kissing Rose on the forehead.

Rose stepped away. She was dressed as Tinkerbell and wore a short green mini-dress. Her hair was pulled up into a French twist at the back of her head and she was covered in glitter from head to toe. On her feet she wore matching green peep toed pumps.

Emmett, of course, was dressed as Peter Pan, complete with green tunic, tights, and the little hat on his head.

"I see now," I said, shaking my head.

"See now what?" Alice asked.

"Charlie!" I shouted.

Within minutes, my son bounded up from the basement and into the living room where we were all waiting. He was dressed as Captain Hook. He had a plastic hook in one hand and a sword in the other. A little black handlebar mustache was drawn over his upper lip.

"Awwww, little dude, you look soooo awesome," Emmett smiled, bending down to straighten Charlie's hat.

"Can I tell you a secret?"

Charlie nodded.

"You're gonna have a cousin."

My eyes grew wide as I looked at Rose. She smiled and nodded. "Oh, my God, are you serious?"

Alice squealed. Charlie looked around at us completely confused, having no idea what a cousin was.

"Auntie Rose is going to have a baby," I tried to explain to him.

Edward and Jasper high- fived Emmett and hugged him tightly. Emmett whispered something into Edward's ear that I couldn't hear and Edward nodded with a smile.

"How far along are you, when are you due?"

"We're only ten weeks. We're due June twenty-second."

"Hey, that's right after my birthday," Edward cheered. "A niece or nephew for me and Bella and a cousin for Charlie is the perfect birthday present."

Again I was hit by the unconscious way Edward spoke of our relationship. Rose must have noticed it too, because she caught my eye and winked.

"Do Mom and Dad know?" Alice clapped her hands.

"They've known for weeks," Rose rolled her eyes. "I swear, Esme is a witch."

"Well, you were trying right?" I asked.

"Yeah, but we've been trying for months. She took one look at me and started freaking out. We had only known for about two days."

Charlie had obviously grown bored of the conversation. He was holding onto Edward's hand and trying to swing himself. Edward appeared to be completely oblivious that he was being used as a jungle gym. He was too busy chatting with Emmett and Jasper.

"Are you okay with all of this, Bella?" Rose asked, softly placing her hand on my elbow.

I furrowed my brow. "Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

"I just...um."

_Oh. OH!_

"No, oh, hey, I'm good, Rose. It's good. I'm happy for you."

"Dudettes, we got's to go if Little C here is gonna get the best candy."

We all started to file out, but were stopped by Esme as she ran in dressed like a Geisha.

"Wait, wait. I have to get a picture," she insisted holding out her camera. We all posed and then she had to get four hundred photos of Charlie before we actually got out the door.

"Say Cheese," she said as Edward kissed my cheek.

"Thanks, ma," Edward groaned. "Don't get too crazy wild tonight."

Esme scoffed. "We're going to a party at the hospital administrator's house, I'm not sure getting crazy is in the cards."

"So who's attending to the patients at the hospital?" I asked.

"I don't know and I don't care. For the first time in years I have Carlisle all to myself on Halloween."

I completely understood Esme's position. Well, maybe not completely, but I understood. Being the Chief of Police, my dad was always being called in on special occasions and holidays. It was frustrating and I remember being really sad. Especially the Christmas Day when I was fifteen that he got called away from opening presents for a house fire. He apologized profusely and said he'd make it up to me, but I still spent the next four hours crying my eyes out.

Once we finally made it to the actual trick-or-treating part, I couldn't deny that I was having a good time. The six of us, laughed and joked and drank beer and hard liquor out of a brown paper bag as we walked from house to house with Charlie. Well, five of us drank, Rose declined for obvious reasons.

Once he figured out how it all worked, Charlie was literally shouting "Trick-or-Treat" before he even made it up to the doorstep and rang the doorbell, but the moment he was faced with the person handing out the candy, he forgot what he was supposed to say.

We all kept sneaking candy from his bucket and eating it along the way. Note to self, chocolate and beer doesn't really taste good together.

An hour later, we found ourselves back at the house. Rose and Emmett headed out to their party back in Port Townsend and Alice and Jasper to theirs.

Charlie had fallen asleep on Edward's shoulder on the walk back and neither one of us could be bothered enough to strip him of his costume, so we simply removed his hat and boots and put him into bed.

Edward closed the door to Charlie's room and followed me into our bedroom. He took off his coat and flicked on the iPod dock, fiddling around for a few minutes before soft music started playing.

I laughed. "Guns & Roses, Edward?"

He nodded. "It's our prom, we need to dance. And can I just tell you how much I fucking love you for knowing that?"

"It's all in the whistle," I teased.

He grabbed my hand and started to sway with me. As Axel Rose began to sing, so did Edward.

x

_Shed a tear 'cause I'm missin' you_

_I'm still alright to smile_

_Girl, I think about you every day now_

_Was a time when I wasn't sure_

_But you set my mind at ease_

_There is no doubt_

_You're in my heart now_

_x_

"Oh my God," I squeaked as he held me close. The words were so perfect for us.

x

_Said, woman, take it slow_

_It'll work itself out fine_

_All we need is just a little patience_

_Said, sugar, make it slow_

_And we come together fine_

_All we need is just a little patience_

_x_

His lips caressed my ear with his warm breath and I felt like I was about to melt.

_x_

_I sit here on the stairs_

_'Cause I'd rather be alone_

_If I can't have you right now_

_I'll wait, dear_

_Sometimes I get so tense_

_But I can't speed up the time_

_But you know, love_

_There's one more thing to consider_

_x_

_Said, woman, take it slow_

_And things will be just fine_

_You and I'll just use a little patience_

_Said, sugar, take the time_

_'Cause the lights are shining bright_

_You and I've got what it takes_

_To make it, We won't fake it,_

_I'll never break it_

_'cause I can't take it_

_x_

Edward swung me around and dipped me, kissing my cleavage as I squealed during the instrumental. He brought me up slowly and grinned.

x

_I Been walkin' the streets at night_

_just tryin' to get it right_

_hard to see with so many around_

_you know I don't like_

_being stuck in the crowd_

_And the streets don't change_

_but baby the name_

_I ain't got time for the game_

_'cause I need you_

_Yeah, yeah, but I need you_

_Oooh, I need you_

_All this time._

_x_

The song ended and Edward stopped moving.

"You're very romantic, you know that?" I giggled.

I felt the zipper on the back of my dress being drawn down, but his eyes never left mine.

He slipped the dress from my shoulders, letting it fall to the floor at my feet leaving me in a strapless bra and panties.

"I have to admit, I'm a little nervous," Edward smiled crookedly. "It being my first time and all."

I laughed. "Are we going all out then?" I asked. "Playing the role to perfection?"

Edward waggled his eyebrows. I unsnapped his cummerbund and bow tie and started unbuttoning his shirt. When he was left in just his slacks, I unbuttoned them and then stepped back to admire.

"Where are you going?" Edward asked confused.

"Nowhere," I smiled walking to the edge of the bed.

Edward pressed his naked chest against my back and ran his hands up and down my arms, tickling the skin and causing me to break out into goose bumps.

"Are you _really_ nervous?" I asked.

"Yes," he whispered.

"Why?"

"I'm afraid of messing up."

I turned in his arms. "Messing up what?"

"With you. I'm always afraid of messing up with you. Of not doing things the way you like. Of not treating you the way you deserve."

I put my hand on his chest and climbed up onto the bed on my knees. I pulled him with me.

"Never be afraid of that. We can't go through life expecting not to mess up with each other. As long as you love me, we can get through anything together."

He crawled after me, laying me down before stripping us both of the rest of our clothing.

I reached over to get a condom, but Edward grabbed my wrist to stop me. I couldn't read his expression when I looked back at him questioningly. He shook his head. Did he not want to have sex with me or was this simply him playing the part?

"We don't need it," he said in low, seductive voice. "I wasn't playing a role when I said it was my first time or that I was nervous."

I watched his face and let what he had just said sink in.

_We don't need it? First time? Oh shit! Oh, oh, oh._

"Really?" I asked finally understanding what he was telling me.

He nodded, his lips turning into a cheeky grin.

"Everything is okay?"

He licked his lips, nodding again just once and then tilting his head.

My heart was suddenly beating really fast. A million questions were running through my head, but the moment Edward's lips met mine they were all silenced. I had no doubts, no fears that could ever compete with my love for that man.

"When did you find out?" I mumbled against his lips."

Edward sighed. "Heidi put it in my bag on Friday, I guess. I didn't find it until this morning. Can we stop talking now? You're kind of ruining the moment."

He brought his mouth back to mine and I hummed in agreement.

I had thought Edward felt amazing with a barrier between us, but the feel of him sheathing himself entirely within me without one was almost more than I could bear.

"Ooooohhhhhh fuck!" he moaned. "This is...this is...I can't. Bella, I gotta go hard. I'm sorry."

"Okay," I whimpered, sliding my hands underneath his and letting him get a little leverage. Edward went hard alright, but his every movement was done with purpose and seconds before he came, I lost myself to the metaphorical white lights and fireworks that accompany extremely intense orgasms.

When we both had regained our breath. Edward growled.

"Fuck, Bella, I'm sorry."

"You're sorry?"

"I've been having sex for almost ten years, you'd think I'd be able to at least go ten minutes; give you multiple orgasms; you know, be a super stud and all that."

I laughed and slapped his chest. "You liar," I feigned anger. "You told me this was your first time. Now I've given myself to you only to have you tell me you've been having sex for ten years?"

"Edward dug his fingers into my ribs, making me squirm and squeal."

"I love you more than you could ever know," he whispered, settling down into my side.

"I know," I joked lazily.

XXXXXXXX

Wednesday came way too fast for my liking. Edward's plane was scheduled to leave Sea-Tac at one in the afternoon, so at seven-thirty, we were all gathered in the main house to say our good-byes. Jasper was going to drive him up in his truck and then pick up some piece of antique furniture that Alice had bought. It saved them $250 in shipping and would only cost about $75 in gas so it was a win/win for everyone. They were scheduled to close on their house on Friday and Alice had spent two weeks buying new furniture to fill their house.

"I miss you, Daddy," Charlie said, squeezing Edward's neck tightly.

"I'll miss you too, buddy. But I'll be back before you know it, okay?"

Charlie nodded.

"You'll take care of your mommy for me until I get back?"

Charlie nodded again. "Uh huh."

"Good. I love you."

"I love you too."

I always found it odd that 'love' was one of the few words where Charlie could actually pronounce the 'l' sound.

Edward set Charlie down and Alice grabbed his hand.

"You be good," Alice said, patting Edward's cheek. "And be careful."

Edward smiled and kissed Alice softly. The look that passed between them didn't escape me. I swallowed thickly. I would have to ask Alice what that was all about, but right now I was simply trying not to bust out crying.

The minute Alice and Charlie were out of the room, Edward's arms wrapped around me, holding me to him so firmly that I could barely move.

"I don't want to go," he breathed into my neck.

"You have to go," I said, trying not to cry.

"No I don't."

"Yes, you do."

"Why?"

"Because this is your future," I sniffled.

Edward pulled back and looked at me. He put his hands on my face, cupping my jaw and brushing his thumbs across my cheeks. "No, Bella, it's not. This isn't just about me anymore, You have to know that. I don't exist without you and Charlie. I don't have to do this, because it doesn't matter, I won't be going without you. This is not my future, this is _our_ future."

The tears that had been welling in my eyes, finally tipped over and spilled down my face. Edward caught them with his thumbs and wiped them away.

"Don't cry," he whispered, kissing my lips gently.

"I can't help it," I kind of hiccoughed. "You can't just say things like that."

"I'm gonna miss you the most."

"And that," I cried. "Stop talking."

"I'll call you when we get to Seattle."

"Okay."

"I love you."

"So much," I whispered.

Watching Edward leave was incredibly hard. It felt like someone was ripping my heart out and putting it into a food processor. It didn't feel right.

I kind of slept walked through the rest of the day. Dropping Charlie off at school, attempting to analyze the data at work. Edward called me at lunch to tell me that he was boarding his plane and would call when he got into Durham. His first interview was on Thursday, right about the time that Charlie and I would be at the park. I didn't even remember the drive home.

Edward called just after six, having just landed in DC. He had a quick layover and wanted to say goodnight to Charlie since he wouldn't land in North Carolina until after eight. I was a little jealous that the two talked so long that I didn't get a chance to, but I sucked it up for the sake of my child.

After I read to Charlie and kissed him goodnight, I avoided my bedroom. Edward called again when he touched down, but he had to grab his rental car and drive to his hotel and he sounded exhausted so I told him to just get some sleep and call me the next day after his interview. After I hung up I watched TV, I played Bejeweled, took a shower, watched more TV. Finally around one a.m. I forced myself into bed only to jump right back up and sleep on the sofa.

Was I being pathetic? Yeah, probably. I'd spent four years on my own; just me and Charlie for the most part. But Edward was a part of us now. For the last few weeks, even when we didn't get to spend more than a few minutes together during the day, I knew that when I crawled into bed at night, his arms would automatically encompass me. I didn't want to sleep in my bed without him there anymore.

All morning, as Charlie zigged and zagged around the park with Carlisle chasing after him, my mind was in North Carolina. Specifically in some office or classroom on the Duke University campus.

When my phone buzzed I jumped to look at it, excited at the prospect that he was done already. What I read made me feel a little nauseous.

**Bella, I've had enough of the avoidance. I'm coming down there. If Edward wants to kick my ass fine but I need to talk to you. ~Riley~**

I reacted quickly without really thinking. I couldn't very well let him come to the home that Edward and I shared. I didn't want to disrespect Edward by allowing that. I also didn't think it was fair for Charlie to have to see Riley after so long and then not know if and when he would ever see him again.

**No. Don't. I'll be up in Seattle tomorrow. I'll meet you for coffee. We can talk then. ~Bella~**

His reply was almost instantaneous.

**That's fine, but if you don't show up I'm heading straight to Forks. ~Riley~**

I sighed. Edward wouldn't be happy, but I didn't have a choice anymore.

**Starbucks Pike Place Market. 2:30. I'll be there. ~Bella~**

I bit my lip. How the hell was I going to tell Edward?

A few hours later my phone buzzed again. I smiled to myself when I saw who it was.

"Hey, baby, how are you?"

"I'm going fucking crazy," Edward practically snarled.

"Why?" I asked alarmed.

"I can't see you, I can't touch you, I can't taste you."

I laughed. "Jesus Christ, Edward I thought something was actually wrong."

"Something _is_ wrong. The questions they asked were really fucking hard. I fucking need you. I can get you on the red-eye out of Sea-Tac to JFK if you can get your shit together in the next forty-five minutes. Both of our flights get in at 9:30. I can meet you in the terminal and you can come with me. My interview is at noon and then we can have the whole weekend in the city before we head up to Boston."

_Shit, he has it all planned out._

"I can't," I whimpered.

"Yes you can. I don't care how much it costs, I will pay it."

"No, I mean, Luke and I have got a huge meeting with the University department heads in Seattle tomorrow morning."

"Damn it," he groaned.

Ugg. He was already agitated. He was not going to take my news well, but I couldn't hide it from him.

"I need to tell you something."

"What?"

"Riley sent me another text."

"I swear to God, Bella, I'm going to file a restraining order against that fucker the second I get home. In fact, I'm calling your dad."

"Edward, stop."

"Did he not get the message? Does he really think that I'm playing around?"

"I told him I'd meet him."

"What?"

Edward's voice was raging and I flinched.

"What the fuck did you just say?"

"I told him I'd meet him for coffee while I was there."

"Why the fuck would you do that?"

"Because I need to."

"Really, Bella? You need to? You put this off intentionally, didn't you? You were waiting for me to leave. That's why you encouraged me to go."

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard, Edward. Of course I didn't. I've been ignoring him for a month. He texted me this morning and said he was coming here whether I wanted him to or not. Would you rather he come to the apartment?"

"No, I don't want you seeing him at all."

"Why?"

"Because he's an asshole."

"Or is it because you don't trust me?"

Edward was silent, making me question whether I had hit the nail on the head.

"I do trust you."

"Then trust me to handle Riley. We're meeting in a public place. I'm not bringing Charlie. I'm telling you about it before it happens."

"What are you going to tell him?"

"The truth. That you are and will always be the only man I love."

Edward sighed and I didn't need to see his face to know what was there.

"I wish you would wait."

"Will you let me do it on my own if I do?"

"No."

"I can't have you starting a fight, Edward."

"And I can't have that motherfucker thinking that because I'm out of town that he can make a move on my girl."

"He doesn't even know you're out of town, I didn't tell him."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why didn't you tell him?"

"Because it's none of his business. It shouldn't matter to him whether you're here, there, or anywhere in between. I'm yours. Only yours."

"Fuck!" he muttered under his breath. "I hate this. I shouldn't have left."

"Please don't. Yes, you should have left. Luke wants to leave by three-thirty and I'm meeting Riley at 2:30. I'll ask Luke to hang out so if I need him, he's there."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Edward. I promise you everything will be fine. If nothing else, I can get some closure."

He made an unhappy sound, but then grunted out a 'fine'.

We talked for another hour about his interview before he had a quick chat with Charlie and then got off the phone to go get some dinner.

That night I cuddled up with my son in his bed, setting my phone alarm to wake me, just in case.

I had to head out extra early on Friday morning. Jasper and Alice were both taking the day off to sign on their new house and offered to take Charlie to school, pick him up, and look after him until I got back from Seattle.

Edward called me on the drive to tell me that he had gotten into JFK and was heading over to the University. Since I wasn't able to fly out there, he was just going to head up to Boston and stay in Carlisle and Esme's brownstone for the weekend. He seemed a little distant and I didn't know if he was distracted by the fact that he was about to do another interview or from knowing that I was going to be meeting up with Riley.

I pulled into my office at half past seven. Luke and I were meeting there and then I was driving us to Seattle where we would meet with the Psychology department heads at twelve-thirty.

When I got to my desk, there was an unmarked envelope sitting on top of my desk calendar.

"What's this?" I asked Luke as I picked it up and turned it over.

"I don't know. I just got here about ten minutes ago."

I tore open the corner and slid my finger underneath the edge hissing as it sliced through the tip of my finger. "Shit!" I shoved the tip of my finger in my mouth and sucked on it.

"You okay?"

"Yes. Paper cut," I sighed pulling my finger from my mouth and holding it up as if he could see the cut from twenty feet away.

I finished opening the envelope and fished out what was inside.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I screamed, dropping everything onto my desk as if it had burnt me.

Luke jumped out of his chair. He practically sprinted to me and reached for the papers, but I snatched them up.

"NO!" I said pushing him away and snatching up the photos.

"What the hell? What is it?"

I wasn't sure if I should start crying or go hunt that bitch Cammy down and ram my fist down her throat. I was equally devastated and furious at the same time.

"Luke, if that bitch ends up dead, I will be the first one to celebrate" I growled.

"Not the first one," Luke grumbled before realization of what I was holding hit him. "Oh, fuck, Bella. Are those what I think they are?"

I nodded, gripping the photos tightly in my hand, refusing to actually look at them. All I had seen was Edward's face and naked body. I couldn't tell you if he was awake or asleep or any other detail, including if he was...aroused or not. I could only imagine that they must have gotten worse.

I counted the corners. There were four photos all together. There was a post it note stuck to the back of the last one that read.

_ Bella, this one's my favorite._

I shoved them all back into the envelope. Luke was looking at me hesitantly.

"Are you going to be able to do what we need to do today?"

I scowled at him. "Of course I fucking am."

He held out his hands in surrender. "Look, I'm just asking. This meeting is important."

"I know it is. So does she." The realization that Cammy was attempting to throw me off my game pissed me off even further.

Luke sighed. "She's just trying to fuck with you."

"Yeah? Really? What gave you that impression?" I ran my shaking hands through my scalp and pulled at my hair. "Well I'm gonna fuck her up the next time I see her, then we'll be even."

I wasn't sure if I had ever in my life been as angry as I was in that moment. Not even Edward in his worst moments had tempted the violence that I felt towards that woman. I wasn't a violent person, but if she had walked into that room at that moment, I wouldn't have hesitated in ending her.

"Let's, um, let's go, Bella."

I put the envelope into my bag with the rest of my things and stormed out of the office with Luke following me.

We arrived in Seattle about half an hour before our meeting and grabbed sandwiches at a little bistro across the street from the building where we would update our funders on our progress and potential findings.

It was pretty basic and everyone seemed to be thrilled with what we were doing. One of the professors asked where Cammy was and Luke was able to brush off her absence saying that she wasn't well. Just the mention of her name made my blood boil and I had to bite my tongue to not make a completely inappropriate comment.

Afterwards, we drove to Pike Place. Luke and I discussed all sorts of things, mostly about him. I was actually surprised to find out that he had been married for ten years, but they divorced a year before when she decided to tell him that she didn't want children. It had devastated him and he had only taken off his wedding ring when he started dating. He didn't mention who he had started dating, but I knew the answer.

_Stupid, fucking bitch._

At a little after two, we headed to the Starbucks and waited. Eventually, I saw Riley come in. He went to the counter and ordered himself a drink before spotting me.

"Hi, Bella," he said quietly as he stood over the table.

I looked up and smiled sadly. "Hi, Riley."

I stayed seated so as not to encourage him to hug me. I knew that's what he wanted.

"This is Luke, my boss," I explained motioning to my left. "We had a meeting at the University today."

"Hey," Riley said offering his hand in greeting.

Luke shook it and then looked at me. "I'll just be over there. Let me know when you're ready to head home."

"Thanks," I nodded.

Luke got up to leave and Riley sat down in his seat. He took a sip of his coffee.

"Thanks for meeting me," he mumbled.

"You didn't give me much of an option."

"Well, you weren't giving me much of one either. Edward must be keeping you on a tight leash."

"You know what, I don't have to do this," I said, standing up and getting ready to leave.

"Wait," Riley almost yelped. "Look, I'm a little bitter. I can't always help what comes out of my mouth, you know that."

I sat back down, noticing that Luke's eyes were on me. I shook my head at him to let him know that I was okay.

"It was my decision not to communicate with you. What you said to me was cruel and hurtful."

"Bella, I am so sorry. You have to know that. I would never intentionally hurt you like I did. I was just upset and it all just came spewing out."

"I get that, Riley. I do, but you crossed a line. You crossed a lot of lines."

"I know I did. I was desperate. I was losing you."

I took a deep breath and let it out again. "You never had me."

Riley's eyes closed tightly and he swallowed. "I had you as a friend."

"And that's where it should have stayed. I never should have let it go. I knew that when you suggested it, but...but at the time it, it just worked."

"When did it stop working?"

"I don't know."

"Cause before Edward started playing daddy, it seemed like it was working just fine."

I could hear the venom and jealousy in his voice, but all it did was tick me off.

"Look," I snapped. "If all you're going to do is sit here and criticize me for being in love with the father of my child, then you can go fuck yourself."

"I don't understand how that happened. How is he so different from that guy you hated."

"I hated him because it hurt less than admitting that I loved him. The more I told myself and everyone else what an asshole he was, the easier it was to justify keeping his son from him. But I was wrong, Riley. I was really. Fucking. Wrong."

"You weren't wrong."

"I was. You don't know his story. You don't know what happened to him. And you throwing it in his face that you were there when he wasn't, was completely repugnant."

Riley stared at me, his mouth open as if he were going to respond, but he stayed silent.

"Do you know how often I regret taking that from him? Do have any idea what I would give to go back and let him be there for his baby's birth? I can see it in his eyes when he looks at Charlie. The love he has for his little boy is devastating."

"What about the love I have for him, Bella," Riley choked. "I was there. And no, I guess that I didn't ever earn the right to be called his daddy, but that doesn't mean that I wouldn't do anything and everything that his daddy would do for him."

"YOU. ARE. NOT. HIS. FATHER!"

We were garnering attention now. Several people around us were whispering and pointing. Luke was once again watching us and looked like he was prepared to step in if I needed him to.

I lowered my voice again. "I am sorry that I let you believe that you could fill that role for him. I am sorry that I couldn't be what you needed. And I am so, so sorry that I've hurt you. But Edward is my life; he's _our_ life, and I am unequivocally in love with him. There never has been and never will be anyone else for me."

Riley's head sank and he rubbed his eyes.

"Okay."

I waited for him to continue, but he didn't.

"Okay? That's it? "

"What else do you want me to say. That I'm happy that you've chosen him over me? That I wish you all the luck and love because you both deserve it? That's not how I fucking feel. I feel like you've strung me along for four years 'just in case' no one better came along."

"I never strung you along," I countered. "We agreed, Riley. We agreed that if either one of us felt more or if we felt something for someone else, it would end. You lied to me. You can't throw it back in my face now."

"I didn't lie to you, I just didn't tell you."

"It's the same fucking thing?"

"It's not. But it doesn't matter anymore. I love you, Bella. And if this is really what you want; if he is really what you want, then I'll stay back. I won't interfere."

"That's what I want," I sighed.

"Um, will you tell little man that I love him?"

"I'll tell him that you said hi. I don't want to confuse him, Ri."

He nodded. "Will I ever get to see him again?"

I bit my lip. "We need time to grow as a family, but I won't let him forget you."

Riley's eyes were glossed over as though he were about to cry, but he didn't.

"Luke and I need to get back."

"Yeah. I'll, um, okay. Look, tell Edward that I'm sorry I was an asshole. I'm not sorry I punched him; he deserved it after what he said, but I'm sorry that I said all that shit."

"Okay. Uh, what exactly did he say?"

I had almost forgotten that Edward hadn't ever told me what he really said.

"He said that he was taking back what was his and that me and my...that I couldn't compete."

I nodded. I could fill in the blanks. Edward was staking his claim, even before he told me how he felt. I couldn't really be mad, because it truth, that's exactly what he had done, but I would definitely have to think up a way to give him a little bit of shit for it.

Riley set his hand on top of mine hesitantly and looked at me once before standing and walking away. There was no 'goodbye' or 'see you later'. Not even a glance backward as he exited the shop.

"You ready to go?" Luke asked, resting his hand on my upper back.

I nodded, not quite sure if I could actually speak at the moment. I wasn't sure what it was meant to feel like to let someone you cared about go, not knowing if you'd ever see them again. It was an odd mixture of relief and pain.

"Yeah, let's go."

XXXXXXXX

When we got back, there was a shiny new BMW sitting in the driveway. I smiled, knowing how excited Edward would be when he got home.

There were also a whole slew of other cars including my dad's cruiser. I decided to head in to the main house, knowing that everyone would be gathered there. I heard laughter and chatter the moment the door opened and found not only all of the Cullens and my father, but Jake and Claire as well.

"Hey, baby girl," Jake boomed, running up to me and swooping me up into a giant bear hug.

"What are you doing here?"

"I saw them at the Thriftway," Esme explained. "Told them I wouldn't take no for an answer."

"Yeah, she wasn't very nice about it either," Jake winked.

"Oh, hush, you," Esme scolded.

I kissed Claire on the cheek and nuzzled Charlie's neck. He was sitting on a kitchen stool eating a bowl of angel food cake with strawberries.

"So, what's the occasion?" I asked, stealing a strawberry and popping it into my mouth.

Alice grinned and put her hand up to her chin. "I have no idea," she said wiggling her fingers.

"Ahhhhhh!" I screamed running over to her, completely ignoring the giggles and laughter around me. "Serious?"

"Serious," Alice chirped.

"Oh my God! Congratulations," I said hugging both Alice and Jasper tightly.

"Edward didn't tell you?" Jasper asked.

"He knew?"

"Yeah, I told him a while ago that I was gonna do it. I thought for sure he wouldn't be able to keep it from you."

I wrinkled my nose and shook my head. "Nope. He didn't tell me."

"Babies and weddings and medical school. I think I've hit the mother's jackpot," Esme laughed.

"Speaking of medical schools, have you heard from E today?" Emmett asked.

Huh. Wow. I had been so wrapped up in the drama of the day that I hadn't even noticed that I hadn't heard from him since he got into New York.

"Yeah, he called this morning when he got into JFK."

Carlisle furrowed his brow. "You haven't heard from him since then?"

I shook my head. "I don't think so, unless he texted me and I didn't hear it."

I pulled my phone out of my purse and looked at it. It was completely dead.

"Oh, shit. Uh, guys I'll be right back."

I ran out the door and to the apartment. I was in such a hurry to plug my phone in and call Edward that I didn't even notice that the door was unlocked.

I rummaged through "the junk drawer" and finally pulled out my power cord. It took about five minutes until my phone would power up enough for me to turn it on, but when it did, I groaned.

_16 missed calls_

_12 missed text messages_

_8 voicemail messages_

"Fuck!" I shouted.

I scrolled through them. Four of the missed calls were from blocked numbers, but the rest were all from Edward.

The text messages started out fine, but then turned frantic.

**Hey, baby, about to head into my interview. Wish me luck. ~E~**

**Just got out. That was grueling. Will call. ~E~**

**Hope you're okay. Heading up to Boston now. Love you. ~E~**

**Where the hell are you? I miss you. ~E~**

**In Boston. Getting worried. Call me. ~E~**

They went on and on getting more upset. Most of them sounded worried, and then I hit the last one, sent about a half hour before I got home.

**Going out. Will be out late. Don't wait up for a call.**

"Shit, shit, shit."

I dialed Edward's phone frantically.

_This is Edward, you know what to do._

"Edward. Damn it." I started. "My phone must have died and the day was so crazy I didn't even realize it. Please call me."

I sent a text too, hoping that maybe it would get to him faster.

**Phone died while in Seattle. I hope your interview went okay. I miss you. I love you. Call me. ~Bella~**

I went back to the main house without listening to my voicemails. I assured everyone that Edward was fine and that my phone had just died, but inside my gut was twisting. He was mad. He knew I was meeting with Riley and then I never responded to his messages.

Charlie and I hung out for another couple of hours before heading back to the apartment. The entire time I was on edge. This wasn't good.

Nothing seemed out of place when we walked through the door. It wasn't until I stepped into his room to get his pajamas that I noticed that something was off. His drawers were pulled open and there were clothes missing from all of them. I looked around the room, noticing other little bits and bobs that were missing, but I couldn't peg exactly what they were.

I ran into Edward's and my bedroom to see if anything was missing from there and was nearly knocked backwards by the sight in front of me. The room was trashed. Curtains pulled down, comforter across the room, sheets torn up. Pictures that had been on the wall were smashed and glass was littered all over the place. I threw my hand over my mouth to keep myself from screaming.

I booked it back to the living room, picked up Charlie and ran as fast as I could, barefoot, to the main house. Everyone was still except for Jake and Claire and they all stared at me and what I'm sure was my pale or maybe even green face. I felt like vomiting.

"Bells?" My dad called me.

I handed Charlie to Rose. "Take him out, please," I begged. She nodded and headed down to the basement.

"What's the matter, sweetheart?" Esme asked in a tone that I could tell was hiding fear.

"The apartment," I choked out. "Someone broke into the apartment."

"What? Who?" Alice asked.

"I...I don't...I don't know."

"Are you sure?" Carlisle looked unsure.

"Yeah. I'm sure. Some of Charlie's things are missing and my room is destroyed."

"Destroyed?"

"Let's go look," my dad said to Carlisle. The two men left along with Jasper and Emmett and I sat with Esme and Alice, trying to control the need to freak out. Esme made me a cup of decaf and sat next to me, running her hands through my hair and whispering words of comfort that I didn't really hear.

What seemed like hours later, but was probably less than twenty minutes, all four men appeared.

"I've called it in," Dad said.

"How is that possible?" Esme murmured to her husband.

"No one was home for a huge portion of the day."

"But why not hit our house too? That would have been far more lucrative."

I didn't hear Carlisle answer.

"I'll go put Charlie to bed upstairs, okay, sweetheart?" Esme cooed in my ear.

All I could do was nod. I needed to call Edward again, but my phone was still plugged in, in the kitchen.

"Daddy, can you go get my phone and charger please? It's in the kitchen."

He nodded and when he came back, I could see the lights from additional police cruisers outside. I tried calling Edward again, with no response.

"Baby, I need you to call me. I think someone broke into the apartment," I sobbed. "Please?" I added softly before hanging up.

It took three hours for the police to do everything that they needed to do. By the time they cleared the apartment, it was after midnight and I refused to go back. Alice offered me some of her pajamas and I curled up in the guest room and fell asleep.

I was woken up at seven a.m. by my phone's very loud ring tone.

"Bella?" Edward's voice was scratchy and raw like he had just woken up. "Bella, oh God, baby, I am so sorry."

XXXXXX

**A/N: Okay. I told you we were about to get crazy. Life is shaking up for our little Cullen clan.**

**The link to the G&R song and to the photo of Edward's new car as well as Bella's "prom" dress ****are on my profile.**

**So Voting has been opened for the Walk of Fame Awards: I have been nominated for Mistress of Mystery and the Scallywag award. Cause you all know you were hatin on Edward for the first half of this story. LOL. the web address is: twinklingswfa (dot) blogspot(dot) com**

**Also, I have been nominated for a golden lemon award: SQUEEEEE. Thank you to those who nominated me for the Safe Sex Can Be Sexy Too award. Voting is open there too so go to it. www (dot) goldenlemonawards (dot) com**

**I have also submitted a o/s for the Fandom Against Domestic Violence. For those who don't know, I work with a DV shelter and it's a cause close to my heart so please donate and you can get a whole lot of awesome reads, including mine which is called THE INVISIBLE LINE.**

**NEXT WEEK: EPOV. Edward's Interviews, night out and his return home. **

No rec this week: But I know a few of you were concerned about my rec a couple of weeks ago not having updated in a while. But SweetVenom69 is back and has updated Bittersweet Irony so check it out.


	26. Have a Little Faith

**AN: You all really f*cking amaze me. So yeah, an early chapter.**

**I know I took you for a loop that last chapter, but I hope you understand that it is all part of the story that I am trying to tell. ****I told you this was going to be a crazy ass roller coaster ride and I meant it. And for those asking, www(dot)mcafee(dot)cc / Bin / sb (dot) html. These are the characteristics of a sociopath. The link is also on my profile.**

**I'm feeling a bit sappy today:**

**To Mel: My trusty pre-reader, banner maker and pictease expert, thank you. I appreciate you soooo much, especially when it's 3 am for you and you're still up doing shit for me. LOL.**

**To Mollie: My fic-wife. Thank you for always encouraging me (and giving me suggestions on how) to take it to the next level and for making sure my ass doesn't chicken out. You all will understand when you get through the chapter. LOL. I luvs you darlin!**

**To everyone who is following me anywhere, being 'vocal' or just reading quietly, my thanks. Whether you're happy with what I'm doing here or not, it takes time and effort to read, and I will always appreciate that you have given me that.**

**Okay, I have never gone to a medical school interview. I did as much research as I could and I still have no idea if this is how it would go, so you might have to grant me a little bit of creative freedom.**

**Oh, and this chapter is DEFINITELY rated M.**

**The usual disclaimer applies.**

XXXXXXX

Chapter 24: Have a Little Faith

EPOV

I didn't want be on that fucking plane. With all the shit that had been going on, something didn't feel right.

I was sitting in business class. Not quite the luxury of first class, but not back in cabbage class either. Once we were airborne, I fucked around on my laptop, trying to keep myself distracted. I looked over some practice questions for the interviews and thought about possible answers. I started to watch the in-flight movie but found myself dozing off. That is until the little old man next to me started talking about his grandkids. I let him talk. I had a new appreciation for bragging about your family. I told him about Charlie and how precocious and full of energy he was. I might have even let it slip about how amazing and patient my wife was. I was kind of liking the whole Mrs. Cullen thing.

I called home when my plane landed in DC. I had a short layover and I knew that by the time I got into the Raleigh/Durham airport that Charlie would already be in bed. I wanted to make sure that I said goodnight. The little sucker talked my ear off. I didn't understand half of the things he said, but I "oh yeah'd? and "wow, cooled" at the appropriate moments. At least, I think I did. I couldn't help but think of the first few conversations that we had, when he would barely talk to me at all. This was definitely a nice change.

Unfortunately that left no time for me to really talk to Bella. I could hear the disappointment in her voice as I told her I had to turn off my phone.

The second flight wasn't much better than the first, although, I kind of missed the little old man. Instead I was sitting next to a very grumpy businessman who kept looking at me like I was an insect buzzing in his ear, even though the only thing I said to him was "hi".

Again, I called Bella when I hit the ground, but I was fucking exhausted. How? I don't exactly know. I really was just sitting on my ass for the majority of the day, but I felt like a zombie and couldn't really concentrate on what she was saying.

By the time I checked into my hotel room, I was literally dead on my feet. I didn't even brush my teeth. I stripped down to my boxers and slipped between the sheets, falling asleep immediately.

I woke up at seven the next morning; East coast time. I briefly wondered if my body had somehow adjusted to wake up at the same time that I normally did to get up with Charlie, but quickly squashed the idea. Most likely, I was awake, because I hadn't slept well to begin with. I didn't realize how much I would miss the warmth of Bella's body lying next to me.

I showered, dressed in a pair of khaki's and a button down, grabbed my keys, wallet, and phone, and made my way out in search of coffee and a pastry. I stared at my phone, wondering how pissed Bella would be if I called her so early. I decided not to chance it. Instead, I spent an hour looking at flight schedules and trying to figure out how to convince Bella to come to me. Then I wandered around close to campus in an attempt to get a feel for whether or not this is where I wanted to be or where they might want to be.

Finally, it was time for my interview. A man met me in the hallway outside of the interview room.

"Mr. Cullen. Thank you for coming. I'm Dr. Samuel Littleton."

"Hello, Dr. Littleton, I'm Edward."

"Well come on in. I'll introduce you to the panel and we'll get started alright?"

I nodded. " I'm honored that you're considering me for admission."

"Well, with your qualifications, it was hard to ignore your application. Your combined score on the MCAT was definitely higher than we're used to seeing. And of course, your letters of recommendation and references spoke very highly of you."

I swallowed and sat down. There were seven people in that room. Five men and two women.

"So we have myself of course, I'm head of the interview committee. Dr. Justin Winger is head of cardiology at Duke University Medical Center. Dr. Lisa Abernathy, alumni, psychiatrist, and instructor."

Dr. Littleton introduced the rest of the panel which included two more instructors, one of whom was a practicing physician, while the other was a molecular researcher. The other two were both alumni and practicing surgeons.

"Why don't you start out by telling us why you've decided to go into medicine." Dr. Littleton began.

I took a deep breath. "Well, my father is a physician. He's really been the biggest influence in my life. He married my mother when I was seven and adopted my siblings and I a few years later. I've watched him care for people over the years. The way his eyes light up when he talks about his job amazes me. He is the most genuine, the most thoughtful man that I know."

They all took notes and looked up at me and then took a few more notes. The scratching of their pens against the paper was nerve racking.

"So what made you choose this program to apply to?" Dr. Winger asked.

"What's not to find attractive about Duke? I'm not going to lie, the prestige that comes along with a medical school degree from Duke is appealing."

Several of them chuckled.

"But, I'm also interested in the way that you've set up your curriculum. I've actually thought about pursuing an additional Master's degree in either public health or business administration."

On and on the questions went. Asking me about my undergraduate experience and why I thought that they should choose me over the other 1000 applicants. Asking me how I was with blood, what I thought was the most pressing medical issue of the day, and how my friends would describe me. I answered the best I could, but when they asked me one question I got held up.

"I'd like to know what are the best and worst things that have ever happened to you," Dr. Abernathy asked, pushing her glasses up onto her face.

I blew out air trying to figure out how exactly to answer the question. They all waited patiently until I could gather my thoughts.

"This is a hard one. Not so much because I don't know the answer, but because it still hurts to think about," I breathed. "I made a mistake as a teenager and I ended up hurting someone that I cared deeply about. It is, by far, the worst thing that I have ever experienced. But, it was also the best. I found out a few months ago that I am a father. She gave me a son. She's helped me grow as a man, as a father, as a partner. I am a different person, a better person, because of her; because of them."

I had read that using the term partner instead of girlfriend was preferred in these types of gatherings, but it just felt weird. I would have called her my wife again, but I had put that I was single on my application and I wasn't sure embellishing would look very good to the interview panel had they discovered it.

"And how do you intend to balance medical school with a family?" Dr. Littleton asked.

"I honestly don't know," I laughed. "It's something I've never had to do before, but I know that I have an incredibly supportive family. I know that this is something that they all understand that I need and want to do."

"And your partner understands the commitment that will be required?"

"I believe she does, yes. She was a single mother for three years. She's one of the toughest and most resilient women I think I've ever known."

It was hard to tell by the looks on their faces what they thought of my confession. None of them appeared to be allowing me to read them.

"Do you mind if I ask why you just found out about your son? Please understand that I'm not trying to be nosy, but I believe it's important in understanding your character," Dr. Abernathy asked again. Leave it to the psychiatrist to dig into my psyche.

"It's okay," I said. "We were very young and immature and we made a lot of assumptions. There was horrible miscommunication and we both paid the price for that. We understand that now, but we can't go back. We can only move forward and learn from our mistakes."

They all scribbled on their pads of paper. I thought I saw a few smiles, but, of course, I couldn't be sure.

Dr. Littleton stood up. "Edward, thank you for coming in today. I know this can be a grueling process. I appreciate your time and your honesty."

"Thank you, sir. For the opportunity."

We smiled and I shook hands with every member of the interview committee. I got about thirty feet out the door before I was dialing Bella.

Just the sound of her voice was enough to calm me, but I still tried to convince her to fly out to me. I wanted her, I needed her. Of course she couldn't. I knew that she was busy with Luke and their research, but I had completely forgotten that they were supposed to present their progress report to the university powers that be until she mentioned it. I was not, however, expecting the next words that came out of her mouth.

All sorts of errant thoughts ran through my head when she said Riley had texted her again. The fucker couldn't just let sleeping dogs lie.

To say that I was pissed off when she said she was meeting with him would have been a gross understatement. I was ready to fly the fuck home and completely blow off the rest of my interviews.

I trusted her. Of course I trusted her. It was him I didn't trust. He wanted my girl and it appeared he wasn't going to back down or go away easily. But I didn't have a choice. I had to let her have her closure.

Eventually, and reluctantly, I let her and Charlie go so that I could head out to dinner. I grabbed a Big Mac and fries at McDonald's, eating it in the hotel room before crashing.

The next morning I gathered my shit, grabbed myself some continental breakfast and headed to the airport to fly to JFK. This time on the flight I had a couple of college co-eds sitting next to me, babbling non-stop. I tried to at least pretend to sleep. Unfortunately their incessant chatter and apparent weak bladders wouldn't allow it. I swear, every fucking five minutes one of them was touching my arm to ask me to move so they could get out. I had no problem mentioning my "wife" and son to them when they asked me if I wanted to go out clubbing with them in the city. I should have done that earlier, because they didn't bug me to get up again after that.

As I made my way through the airport in New York City, I couldn't help but think about the possibility that Bella and I would have different ideas about our future. She had said that it was "my future." What would she say if I decided that I wanted to go to school on the East coast? She wanted me to make the decision based on where I really wanted to go, but she didn't realize that I didn't want to go anywhere without her so if she wasn't willing to go, neither was I. This all seemed like a huge fucking waste of time.

That is where my mind was when I called her to tell her I had landed. She was on her way to work before heading to Seattle with Luke. I didn't want to think about her meeting with Riley. I knew Bella loved me and that she wouldn't go back to him, but my jealousy was a little overwhelming and I just needed to get off the phone before I snapped at her.

Meeting with the Columbia College of Physicians and Surgeons interview panel was similar to that at Duke.

I was met by Dr. Charlene Draeger in the hallway and escorted into a room with nine people, including Dr. Anali Verma, Chief of Surgery, Dr. Timothy Haden, practicing psychiatrist and instructor, and Dr. Fran Weinberger, a recent graduate and intern.

"Hello, Mr. Cullen. Thank you so much for coming in today. Let's go ahead and get started."

The panel asked some of the same questions that the Duke panel had asked, so those were pretty easy. Why I wanted to be a doctor and such. My answer to why I chose to apply to Columbia was similar to why I chose Duke. The reputation and prestige were definitely a turn on.

Some of the questions were a little harder.

"If you had to choose to give a transplant to either an upstanding elderly member of the community or a 20-year-old drug addict, who would you choose?" Dr. Verma asked me.

"I would have to make that decision based on the case," I said confidently. "I think it's important to get a full background and history on each patient before making those types of life-altering decisions. How long has the young patient been an addict, what type of drug and what led to the addiction. The health history of the elderly patient. If we were to give him or her a transplant simply to have it fail or to have some other organ failure. It's not an answer I can give you in an interview room."

They scribbled, just as the Duke panel had done.

"Mr. Cullen," Dr. Draeger said. "We are a very research intensive program. Is research something that you're interested in?"

"I like working with people. I like the interaction that I get to have with people, because every day is different, but I agree that research is extremely important. Every day new treatments are being discovered to treat those people that I like to work with so much. Being a part of that research would be an exciting and rewarding experience for me as well."

An hour later, I was beginning to run low on energy. But of course, they had to ask the inevitable family question. This time, it came from Dr. Weinberger, the intern.

"Tell us about your family. How do they feel about your decision to go to medical school?"

"I have a partner, Bella, and a three-year-old son. Of course, my son is really too young to have any input, but he likes the idea of Daddy being a doctor. He asks me all the time if I want to be a doctor like Papa when I get older." I smiled to myself as I thought about him.

"Bella is exceptionally supportive. She knows how much I want this and encourages me every step of the way. The rest of my family is close knit. We talk daily and someone is always available to provide a helpful hand or a willing ear."

"Does your partner understand that she may essentially be a single parent for the duration of your medical education and internship? The amount of time that you will spend studying and in the medical center can really take its toll on the family," Dr. Haden asked.

"We've been through a lot together already. I think that there would be very little that could tear us apart at this point," I smiled.

I asked a few questions myself including how students were evaluated, about their mentoring/advising system and any suggestions for how to survive the medical school experience. They all thought that was funny, but I hadn't really meant it as a joke.

When I got out of the interview I tried calling Bella, but she didn't answer. Then I tried texting her. She didn't respond so I figured she must be in her meeting.

As I was about to leave the building, I was stopped by Dr. Weinberger.

"Don't let them scare you off, Mr. Cullen," she said with a shy smile.

"I'm not sure I understand what you mean."

"I got pregnant when I was fourteen. My family was furious, not just because I was young, but because my boyfriend was Italian Catholic. I had the baby, Georgia, and ended up having to get my GED. My family wasn't very supportive. Danny and I broke up and got back together so many times it was ridiculous, but when I was nineteen, he asked me to marry him and I did.

Our families weren't happy and pretty much abandoned us. We were so broke it wasn't even funny. But I managed to get a scholarship to the State University of New York. It took me six years, but I graduated Summa Cum Laude with a degree in Molecular Biology. By the time I applied to medical school, I had three more kids. The Columbia interview panel told me not to bother; that there was no way that I could balance medical school with four kids. But I did. And now I'm doing just fine as an intern as well."

I stared at her. This woman had succeeded in doing things against the odds. I was in absolute awe.

"I'm not going to tell you it's easy, because it's not," she sighed. "Danny and I have separated twice, but that whole saying what doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger, is absolutely true. So have faith."

I didn't know what to say to her, so I simply mumbled out a thank you before turning to go.

My plan was to head up to Boston straight away. Being in the comfort of my parent's old brownstone would be much better than staying in a hotel. It would be nice to meet up with some friends I knew were still in the area too. Most of those born and raised in Boston rarely went too far.

I dialed my buddy Brian and he answered instantly.

"Edward! What's up, brother. Long time no hear."

"Yeah, I know. I'm shit with e-mail."

"You need a facebook page, man."

"No. The last thing I need is to have people cyber-stalking me. I've burned too many bridges."

Brian laughed. "Yes you have. So to what do I owe the pleasure of a phone call?"

"I'm in New York."

"No shit?"

"No shit. I just finished up my medical school interview with Columbia and I'm heading up to Boston until Monday. You up for a drink at O'Shay's?"

"You know I am. I'll drag Chelsea along, I'm sure she'd love to see you."

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea," I chuckled. "We didn't leave on such good terms."

"Whatever, Ed. She adores you, she'd forgive you for anything."

"I'll give you a call when I get in."

"Cool, see ya."

I hung up the phone and dialed Bella again. I got her voicemail...again.

I tried to reach her for the next four hours as I drove. With every message left unreturned I was getting more worried and really fucking agitated. It was six when I hit Boston. She should have not only finished her meeting with the university, but also with Riley.

By nine o'clock, I was just plain pissed. I send Bella a text message telling her I was going out and not to wait up for a call. Douche move? Yes. I almost instantly regretted it, because with my history, Bella would have to wonder what I was doing. But she was the one not returning my messages. She hadn't tried to call me all day, not even to see how the interview went. For all I knew, Riley could have convinced her to sleep with him just one last time.

Did I really believe that? No. I trusted Bella, but once the thought flitted through my head, it was hard to get rid of.

Brian and Chelsea showed up on my doorstep at a quarter after nine. Brian and I fist pounded and did the whole dude hug before I looked at Chelsea sheepishly. She had her hands on her hips and what I liked to call the bitch brow in place. It really wasn't all that surprising that she and Rose were such good friends.

"Hi," I said quietly.

"Hi. Why do you look so different?"

I shrugged and we stared at each other before I finally smiled my crooked smile at her.

"Oh, fuck you, Edward Cullen, you don't play fair," she moaned before pulling me into a hug.

I waggled my eyebrows at Brian over her shoulder and he laughed.

"Am I forgiven then?"

"Telling my big brother that Brian popped my cherry when I was eighteen was a dickhead move, Edward," she frowned. "You know it landed him with a broken nose?"

"Oh shit, really?" I snickered.

Brian shrugged and punched my arm.

"Yes. And if he didn't look so cute with that little bump, I'd be making sure he paid you back for that," she grinned. "But if we make you any cuter, you're going to have to go into hiding."

I let her go, turning her around and putting my arm around her shoulders as we walked out down the steps.

"Dude, are you seriously flirting with my girlfriend right in front of me?"

"Nah, I'm making amends," I laughed.

We walked just like that to O'Shays, a pretty decent sized Irish pub a few blocks down the road. My arm stayed around Chelsea while Brian held her hand on the other side. I didn't care what it looked like, these guys had been my friends. Chelsea had spent the first couple of years begging me to get rid of Tanya. She called her a "skanky ho who wasn't right in the head."

Chelsea was a nurse in a psychiatric hospital. I was of the firm belief that she and Bella would get along really well.

It took me all of five minutes to realize that I was in a shitload of trouble. The same crew that had hung out at O'Shays when I was in school, was the same crowd that hung out there now. I wasn't on good terms with a lot of them. I was pretty sure that I was going to get punched or slapped at least once.

"Don't worry, man. Chelsea and I will protect you," Brian joked as he took in the look on my face.

"Yeah, thanks."

They did just that, deflecting several advances of past flings. Chelsea wasn't very big, but she managed to successfully threaten a very pissed off boyfriend of a girl I had...distracted. A year after the fact and the fucker still had it in for me. In the middle of all of this I realized just how much my life had changed in the few months it had been since I left. I looked at my phone, no messages.

"I'm going to get a drink, you need one?" Brian asked.

I held up my beer. "Nope, I'm good. Where'd Chels go?"

Brian nodded his head. I saw Chelsea standing next to a guy laughing.

"Who's that?"

"Her high school boyfriend," he shrugged.

"You don't get jealous."

"No. Why should I?"

"I don't know. She's talking to other guys. I mean, he's had his hands on her at some point, right?"

Brian looked over at me and squinted his eyes. "You got something you're not telling me?"

I shrugged. "I have a lot of things I haven't told you yet."

"Let me go get my beer and we're gonna have a little chat."

I nodded and watched him go. I looked back over at Chelsea. As much as I trusted Bella, I wasn't that secure in myself.

"Hey, stranger."

I jumped a little at the sound of the voice and turned to see a very pretty, very familiar face staring back at me.

"Hi, Amber," I smiled half-heartedly.

Amber was a girl I had hooked up with multiple times over my undergraduate career. She was about 5'7", long and lean with light brown hair and green eyes. She was a fitness fanatic and a complete flirt. I should have anticipated her next move, but my mind was too preoccupied with the fact that it was after seven in Forks and I still hadn't heard from Bella.

Amber moved in close and I had to turn my head quickly to avoid her as she tried to kiss my mouth. She pulled back and stared at me questioningly.

"Uh, yeah, sorry, I...I've got a girl back home."

"That never stopped you before," she purred, trailing her finger up and down my arm.

I grabbed her wrist gently, but firmly and removed it from my body. "It's stopping me now," I said bluntly.

She furrowed her brows and pouted her lips. I'd seen her do this many times to get what she wanted. It had always worked. But not this time. I wasn't that man, that guy; whatever the hell I was before, I wasn't him. I met her gaze straight on.

"Holy fucking shit!" She shouted over the music. "Edward Cullen is in love? Like, real live love?"

I grinned sheepishly and glanced down into my beer before l looked back up at her.

"Well, shit," she sighed. "She's a lucky woman."

I wanted to say some cheesy shit about me being the lucky one, but it didn't matter. Amber didn't care.

"Are you here to stay or are you just visiting?"

"I've got an interview at Harvard Med on Monday. If I move back, they'll be coming with me." I said this confidently. I didn't know if Bella would want to come with me or not, but I knew, without a doubt, I would not be leaving her and Charlie. Ever.

"They?"

"We have a little boy," I told her before taking a big swig of my beer.

Amber's mouth dropped. "Uh...wow. So, you're like, a total DILF then?"

I choked, nearly spitting my drink all over her. She giggled and I raised my eyebrows at her.

"You know, Daddy I'd like to..."

"I know what it means, thanks."

She licked her lips looked me over from head to toe. "Wow, off the market. Who woulda thought?"

I cleared my throat, a little uncomfortable. I could feel her eyes on me as my own darted around the room, hoping she'd get the message. She did.

"Well it was nice to see you anyway," she smiled. "Good luck on your interview."

"Thanks," I nodded.

_Three, two, one..._

"Did you seriously just turn down Amber 'the yoga instructor' Tracie?"

I nodded and took a sip of my beer. I picked up my phone and checked it again. Nothing.

"Dude, what is the matter with you?"

"Life changes," I said simply. "I had to grow up at some point."

"Yeah, but Amber? You said no to Amber? You've never said no to Amber."

"What-the-fuck-ever," I scoffed. "This coming from the guy who's been completely pussy-whipped over the same girl for four years."

"True," Brian sighed, glancing over at Chelsea like the sap that he was. I couldn't help but laugh at the love-sick fucker. I wanted to tell him about Bella, but the topic never came back up because Chelsea dragged us over to talk to Derek...the ex. Oh joy!

After another half-hour of beer, loud music, and really annoying chicks trying to get my attention, I'd had enough. I checked my phone for the four-hundredth time and slammed it back down on the table.

"Fuck!"

I turned to Brian. "I'm going home," I scowled.

He looked at his watch. "It's not even eleven."

"I know and I'm sorry, man. I'm just not up for this."

"Alright. Well, give me a call, maybe we can meet up this weekend. Meet up for a round."

He swung his arms like he was swinging a golf club and I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah," I laughed. "Night."

I walked the four blocks to the Brownstone, picking up a bottle of Jack Daniels at the corner liquor store on my way. I may not have been in the mood to party it up at the pub, but I was certainly in the mood to get shitfaced. I had no idea what Bella could possibly be doing this late, but I didn't want to think about it anymore. I knew it wasn't the best way to handle my emotions, but being by myself, in a big empty house was depressing as fuck. I missed my family. I shouldn't have left without them. I should have tried to schedule the interviews during a time when they could have come with me.

_How am I going to make it another three days?_

I spent the next two hours drinking half the bottle and watching The Godfather on DVD, since the cable wasn't hooked up. I must have passed out, because I woke to extremely bright lights pouring in through the windows and a raging headache.

I was still in my clothes from the night before and I fucking reeked of alcohol. It had been months since I drank that much and my body was protesting violently. My stomach churned and I barely had a chance to get to the mini-bar sink before I puked up everything that had been in my stomach.

_Shit, when was the last time I ate?_

I looked at my watch and saw that it was just after nine in the morning. The very first thing I thought about was Bella.

I searched my jeans pockets for my phone.

_Nope._

I looked around the couch, thinking that maybe it had fallen in between the cushions. Finding nothing, I moved on to the coat I had been wearing. Not there.

I tore around the house, frantically searching for my phone.

"Arrrggg, where the fuck is it?" I roared to the empty room causing my brain to feel like it had just splintered.

The house phone had been disconnected for months. I had no way to call anyone to find out where my phone was or to call Bella to make sure that everything was okay. I really needed to fucking apologize for leaving such a punk ass text message.

I flopped down on the sofa and put my hands on my head. I don't really know how much time passed, but eventually I heard a knock on the door. I stood up and staggered my way, squinting at the even brighter light that assaulted my eyes when I opened the door.

"What?" I grumbled to the shadow of a person that stood in front of me.

"Hey man! Wow, you look like shit."

"Oh, hey. Thanks. I'm trying to find my fucking phone."

Brian held up his hand. "You mean this?"

"Oh, fuck, Christ, thank you." I grabbed the phone out of his hand.

"Yeah. You left it on the table last night. Someone by the name of Bella called you. And there were a couple of others too."

"Did you answer it?"

"Uh, no. Chelsea almost did though."

"Fuck. That would have been bad."

Brian chuckled. "So, dude, is this Bella chick the one who has your balls in a vice?"

I couldn't help but smile. "It's more than that."

"No need to explain," Brian smirked. "I feel the same way about Chels."

"She had my kid."

Brian choked. "What? You have a fucking kid?"

I nodded.

"When did that happen?"

"He's three and a half."

"Fuck, Ed, and you just found out?"

"Yeah."

"And she's your girl?"

"She's my life. So is he."

"Wow... Why am I just finding out about this now?"

"I don't know," I mumbled. "You wanna come in? It's really fucking bright out there."

"No, I don't," Brian laughed. "I'm supposed to be at the gym in twenty minutes. I just thought you'd be missing that."

"Yeah, I was, thank you."

"No problem, man. Go, have some coffee. And take a shower, you fucking stink."

I raised my hand and shut the door as he turned around and walked down the cement steps.

I sighed in relief. Now, it was time to call home. I went through my missed messages first. There were three text messages. Only one from Bella though.

**Phone died while in Seattle. I hope your interview went okay. I miss you. I love you. Call me. ~Bella~**

_Well, fuck me. I should have figured it would be something like that._

The other text messages were weird.

**Edward, you need to call home ASAP. ~Dad~**

And one from an unknown number that simply read.

**Found you**

I shook my head and pulled up my voicemail. Bella again.

_"Edward. Damn it. My phone must have died and the day was so crazy I didn't even realize it. Please call me."_

I felt like an asshole for sending her so many texts. The last one was completely uncalled for now that I knew what had really happened. I began to prepare myself for a completely pissed off girlfriend when the words of the last message ripped through me.

_"Baby, I need you to call me. I think someone broke into the apartment. Please."_

_What the fuck?_

My shaky fingers scrambled all over the face of my phone, but eventually I got the number right.

I didn't even wait for her to talk when I heard the line connect.

"Bella? Bella, oh God, baby, I am so sorry."

"Edward?"

"Are you okay? Is Charlie okay? What happened?"

"Hold on," she said. I heard shuffling around and then she was back on the phone. "Where the fuck have you been?"

Oh shit, she was pissed. Even in her sleep addled state, she was Really. Fucking. Pissed.

"I went out with Brian and his girlfriend Chelsea to a pub down the block."

"Yeah, I got that message. The one where you told me not to wait up. Don't worry, I didn't."

_Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!_

"Shit, Bella, I know I shouldn't have sent that text, but you didn't reply to any of my God damn messages. How else was I supposed to respond?"

"How about by calling your fucking mother or father, or sister, or brother. They were all here, Edward.

"I left my phone at the bar and the house phone isn't turned on. Brian brought it back to me this morning. Give me a fucking break here. It's not like I did it on purpose."

I heard Bella chuckle humorlessly. "You know what? I'm too fucking exhausted for this conversation right now. I have to talk to the police this morning and try to salvage what's left of our bedroom."

"Fuck, Bella. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, we're fine. We slept at your parent's last night. Why the hell do you sound so funny?"

"I got fucking shitfaced. I've got the hangover from hell."

The line was silent for way too long. "Bella?"

"I'm here."

"I'm sorry. I was pissed off that I couldn't get a hold of you. I was worried and you didn't get back to me. I thought you were ignoring me."

"I thought you said you trusted me."

"I do."

"Then what were you worried about?"

"I...I don't know. Fuck, hold on, my head is killing me. I can't think straight."

I stood up and went into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of Advil and popping a couple in my mouth. I turned on the faucet and stuck my head under it, slurping up enough water to swallow before putting the phone back up to my ear.

"Okay."

"So, you got pissed off and decided to go to a bar and drown yourself in liquor again? How did that work for you last time?"

_Ouch! Low blow, but well deserved._

"Fuck, Bella, no. I called Brian while I was still in New York to see if he wanted to go grab a beer. I couldn't relax because I hadn't heard from you. I grabbed a bottle of Jack on my way home. I drank half the bottle and passed out on the couch."

"Look, I don't mean to be a bitch, but you really need to find a better way to handle stress," she sighed.

"I know."

"Well, while you were out getting yourself shitfaced, I was dealing with the fact that someone broke into the apartment."

"Last night? While you and Charlie were there?"

"No. Yesterday some time. While we were all out. Some of Charlie's things were taken and our room was destroyed."

I was trying to wrap my alcohol riddled mind around what Bella was telling me. "Wait, they took Charlie's things? Like...what? Does he have anything that is really valuable? Did they take anything else?"

"I don't know. I'm supposed to go through things today and see what's missing."

"The TV? The stereo?"

"Nothing was touched in the main rooms. Just Charlie's and ours."

"That's fucking weird. You called the cops?"

"My dad did. He was here when I discovered it."

"Discovered it? What do you mean discovered it?"

"I didn't notice it until I went to put Charlie to bed."

"How do you not fucking notice that someone broke into the house?"

"Because it wasn't obvious until I saw our bedroom. Why are you being such a dick?"

"Because I'm three thousand miles across the country and can't do shit. I'm coming home."

"No, Edward, we're fine. Stay, do your interview. Besides, I'm thinking that I might want to go get shitfaced myself tonight."

"Are you trying to piss me off? Cause it's fucking working. I can reschedule," I snapped. I knew I had no right to be angry, but she was coming at me with claws drawn. It was instinct to protect myself by lashing out.

"Why?" Her voice cracked. She was upset. My heart melted; my anger faded.

"Because believe it or not, baby, I actually want to make sure you both are safe. You and Charlie are everything to me and if something happened to you, I couldn't survive. Do they have any idea who it might have been?"

"I do."

"Who?"

"When I got into work yesterday, there was an envelope on my desk."

My stomach knotted up real tight, the alcohol threatening to make another appearance. I couldn't talk. I didn't want to know. Because I already knew.

"Are you going to ask?"

"No."

"I haven't told my dad yet."

"He already knows."

"What?"

"I told him what happened last week."

"And you're still alive?"

I chuckled. "Yes, baby, I'm still alive. He did a background check on her, but I don't know what he found yet."

"That's what you were talking to him about last weekend?"

"Yeah. I went into the station on my way home one of the days you weren't with me. I figured he couldn't kill me if he was surrounded by other cops, right?"

"Hmmm, I wouldn't have taken the chance, but obviously you were right," she grumbled.

"Well, I told him everything. He was surprisingly not that angry. But he said there wasn't much he could do because it was out of his jurisdiction and there really wasn't any proof."

"You do realize that when my dad is calm, he's usually pretty fucking pissed off, right?"

_Uh, oh shit!_

"Shit, I should have told him about the photos."

"Go ahead. He already knows there's a possibility. I told him that Luke found photos of other guys. If she's the one who broke in, that's got to be enough evidence to put her in jail, right? Or to at least search her apartment? I'm not exactly looking forward to facing him once he sees them, but at this point, what choice do I have?"

"Fuck," Bella whispered.

"What?"

"Do you think she could have been the one to trash your car?"

I thought about it for a moment. "The hooker said it was a guy."

"No the hooker said she saw a guy poking around, she didn't see who actually did it."

There was no way I was getting through the rest of the weekend, much less my interview at Harvard with the shit that was going down back home. If it was Cammy and not something totally random, then she had gone from simply crazy to psychotic and I wasn't comfortable.

"Bella? Will you please consider jumping on a plane with Charlie tonight and coming to Boston? I'm not going to be able to do this if you don't."

Bella was silent for a few seconds. "I'll talk to my dad and call you back, okay."

I sighed in relief. "Just give me the go ahead and I'll book the tickets."

"Give me ten minutes."

XXXXXXXX

I stood at Logan International Airport literally twiddling my thumbs. I was attempting to see how fast I could make them circle each other. It helped ease the anxiety I was feeling waiting for my family to come through the security gates.

Finally I spotted them. Charlie had on a little green turtle backpack and Bella carried the diaper bag.

"Daddy!" Charlie squealed, running up to me and jumping into my arms.

"Oh, I am so happy to see you," I groaned, hugging him tightly in my arms and rocking him back and forth.

"Daddy, I went on an airpwane."

"I know," I chuckled.

Bella stood back, biting her lip. I grabbed her upper arm and pulled her to me, kissing her head and nuzzling my face into her hair.

"Thank you," I whispered softly.

She glanced up at me. "We're going to have a little talk later," she said seriously.

I nodded. "Yeah, I know. How was the flight?" I asked, setting Charlie down and grabbing the diaper bag off of her should, nearly falling over. "What the hell is in this thing?"

Bella laughed. "Everything I thought I might need to keep a three-year-old entertained on an 8 hour plane trip."

"Oh. Did it work?"

"Eh. He fell asleep on the flight to Chicago and I just let him run up and down a ramp for the entire hour there. We colored, we ate snacks, we watched a movie. It could have been worse. Considering he's never been on a plane before, he did surprisingly well."

"Wow. How is it possible that he still has so much energy?"

"It's only seven in Seattle, Edward."

_Duh, I'm an idiot._

"Are you hungry?"

"I am!" Charlie piped up. I snorted. "Of course you are, buddy. That was a silly question."

I grabbed Bella's hand, kissing her knuckles. "I love you."

"I love you too," she smiled.

We collected their bag and Charlie's car seat that Bella had checked through and made our way to the car. On the way home, I picked up some take out from an Indian place.

"Wow," Bella gaped as we pulled in front of the brownstone. "This is it? The money pit?"

I snorted. "Yeah, how'd you know about that?"

"Your mom told me a while ago. She told me about Em getting stuck in the floor."

I grabbed everything out of the trunk while Bella pulled Charlie out and we got inside.

"The heat's still on, but it's set on low because we're not here anymore. It's high enough that the pipes won't burst, but not enough to cause a huge bill every month. There's no phone or television."

"Are your parents going to keep it?"

I shrugged. "Don't know. I suppose it all depends on where we end up for medical school."

Bella stared at me for a moment and then smiled shyly.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Nothing."

I set the bags down on the floor and turned on the lights. We sat down at the dining room table and I grabbed plates before pulling the food containers from the plastic sack.

"What's dis?" Charlie asked, holding up a veggie pakora.

"That's a Pakora, buddy. Dip it in that red sauce there," I said pointing to one of the tiny dipping containers. "And taste it. It's good."

His face lit up as he ate it. "What's dis one?"

"That's a chicken Pakora. It's good too."

We went through the entire meal that way. Charlie holding something up and me explaining what it was. He wouldn't touch the lamb though. Not after I told him that a lamb was a baby sheep. The look of horror on his face was absolutely comical.

At a quarter past eleven, Bella insisted it was time for him to go to bed. I took them up the stairs and showed them the bedroom. First pointing out to Charlie where we would be, and then pointing out where he would be. Finally I made sure he knew where the bathroom was.

"You get to sleep in Uncle Emmett's bed," I said as Bella pulled his pajamas from the bag.

"It's reawy big," Charlie whispered.

"Well Uncle Em, is a big guy," I whispered back.

Charlie nodded and allowed Bella to dress him. After brushing his teeth, he climbed into the huge bed. He looked so tiny in it, I was almost afraid he'd get lost.

"Can you read to me, Daddy?"

I turned to face Bella and she handed me a book that she had been holding.

"I'll be in the other room," she said, kissing Charlie and heading out.

It took Charlie exactly six pages before he was out like a light.

When I got back to my old bedroom, Bella was standing next to the bed with her back to me searching through her purse.

I slipped my arms around her waist and pressed my chin into her shoulder.

"I missed you so fucking much," I sighed before pressing my lips against her soft skin.

She tilted her head, giving me more access. "I missed you too. It's hard to sleep without you these days."

I allowed my hands to wander under her shirt and across her stomach. When I went to unbutton her pants, she stopped me.

"We need to talk."

"Bella," I groaned as she turned in my arms and then sat down on the bed. "I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"You can't just do that, Edward. You can't assume the worst and send me nasty text messages and voicemails when you don't get your way." Her voice was harsh and she sounded hurt.

"What the fuck did you think I was going to do?"

"I didn't know."

"You must have had some idea or you wouldn't have gotten so ticked off."

I sighed.

"Do you have any idea how it made me feel to read that text? You don't exactly have the greatest reputation for being able to control yourself when you get upset."

With that comment I exploded. I knew that I wasn't the most rational of guys all of the time, but I was fucking trying. All the time, I was trying. Sometimes it was like she didn't even see how fucking hard I was trying.

"What about fucking Riley?" I roared. I realized quickly that I needed to tone it down if I didn't want to wake Charlie. "How was I supposed to feel about you meeting up with your lover while I was out of town?"

"He's not my lover, Edward. He's my friend."

"He WAS your friend."

"No, he IS. Even if I never see him again. Do you know what I said in that coffee shop? Do you even care? I told him, fuck, I told the whole damn place, that you were the only man that I have ever and would ever love. That _you_ were Charlie's father and _you_ were our world. And you didn't even fucking trust me. Instead you go out to your old drinking grounds. And you know what? Not once did I ever consider that you would cheat on me. Not once did I question what you would do if you ran into an old hook-up. And don't try to tell me that it didn't happen. I know you too well."

She had me there. She trusted me implicitly even though I had done my best to make her question it. And yet, even with her constant reassurance, I had assumed the worst.

I got down on my knees in front of her. " I know. I was a dick for sending you the messages. I was frustrated and worried. I'd just driven four hours and..."

Bella was looking at me with a pained look in her eyes.

"And I have no excuse," I continued. "I was an asshole. I knew that the message would get to you. I was looking for a reaction."

"Do you plan on doing that every time we argue? Every time we disagree? Cause you basically told me to go fuck myself because you were going out drinking."

"No. I don't. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking of the repercussions."

"Obviously." She sighed and ran her hand through my hair. "Edward, you can't do this anymore. You have a child. Your problems aren't going to get solved by going drinking."

"That's not what I was doing. I made the plans with Brian before I even left New York."

"I'm not talking about going out. I'm talking about the half a bottle of Jack Daniels that you pounded. My guess is that had you not drunken yourself stupid you would have realized earlier that your phone was missing."

I thought about that. Yes, I probably would have.

"I trust you, Edward. I trust the man that you have become. But I don't trust the man that you were; the one who makes rash decisions and leans on alcohol in some stupid attempt to make everything disappear. That is the man who brought Cammy into our lives. I don't know how much of this fuckery she is involved in, but I know that she is a sociopathic bitch and she is doing her damnedest to make my life a living hell. I can't handle that man and...I don't want to. "

I swallowed thickly. In all honestly, I didn't trust that man either. But like I said, I wasn't him anymore.

We sat in silence, me on my knees resting my head on her thigh and her trailing her fingers through my hair, scratching my scalp. Finally I looked up at her.

"I can't tell you that I'm going to be perfect. I'm still an asshole...a lot. I'm still moody and broody and I have a temper that I can't always control. But I can tell you that you and Charlie mean everything to me. You already know that, but I'll tell you a million times a day if I have to. I want you, always; forever, and I won't ever intentionally do anything to jeopardize that again."

Bella face softened and she cracked a small smile and crooked her finger. I lifted myself off the ground and pressed my lips against hers.

"You better not," she warned. Her tone was playful, but I knew that she was serious.

I crawled on top of her, relishing in the smell of lavender and vanilla as I lavished her with gentle kisses. We undressed each other slowly, purposefully. But the purpose wasn't to fuck, have sex, or to make love. We simply wanted to be close; to reconnect. I held her in my arms as tightly as she would let me all night. This is where I wanted to be. Regardless of where I went to school, as long as she was in my arms every night, I was where I belonged.

XXXXXX

Bella and I woke the next morning to Charlie climbing into bed with us. Luckily he didn't even try to wiggle under the covers, he simply snuggled up in between us and fell back to sleep. That allowed both Bella and I to at least put on our underwear.

I dozed off and on for the next hour and a half before finally getting up. I threw on some flannel pants and padded barefoot to the kitchen to start the coffee pot. Bella followed a few minutes later, kissing my back as she ran her nails across my chest. I shivered and captured her lips.

"I feel better with you guys here," I told her quietly.

"I feel better here," she sighed, rubbing her eyes.

"Did you go through the apartment?"

She shook her head. "I didn't have time to clean it up, but I did a quick run through."

"And?"

"And, I don't know. I don't know exactly what's missing. Charlie has too many clothes and toys to pinpoint what is gone and it doesn't look like anything was taken from our room. Everything was just...fucked up; thrown around, shattered, ripped."

"Do you really think it was Cammy?"

"I have no idea. I can't imagine that it would have been anyone else. If it was random, they would have taken the valuable stuff, or robbed your parent's house."

I hummed in agreement. It wasn't random. "Did you tell your dad your suspicions?"

Bella nodded. "I told him about the pictures too. I had to give them to him, but he made me copies."

"What the fuck for?"

"I didn't know if you wanted to see them or not."

"Did your dad look at them?"

Bella nodded sadly.

"Did you look at them?"

"No. I didn't want to see them. My dad thought that was a good idea."

I pinched the bridge of my nose. "I can't believe she took fucking photos," I growled.

We both turned our heads when we heard the scuffling of little feet. At the same time, the coffee pot beeped its readiness.

We spent the morning at a little bakery that my mom had frequented and then I took Bella and Charlie on a mini-tour of Boston. For lunch we met up with Brian and Chelsea at the bistro that Brian's uncle owned. I was right about Bella and Chelsea. They hit it off amazingly. They talked all about all sorts of psychology shit. Stuff I didn't understand. Apparently I wouldn't be going into psychiatry.

Chelsea doted all over Charlie. Both she and Brian just about shit themselves when they first saw him. Brian just kept looking at me and shaking his head. When Bella got up to take Charlie to the bathroom, they both pounced.

"Dude, you fucking scored with that woman. Why the hell did you waste your time with anyone else?" Brian scoffed.

"No shit, Edward. She is absolutely perfect for you," Chelsea added. "I have never seen a woman who can keep your ass in line like that."

I rolled my eyes. "It's always easier when you're sitting over there. Things weren't always like this for us."

"Well I love her," Chelsea said, popping a mint into her mouth. "I think you should marry her, bring her to Boston, and have more beautiful babies for me to play with."

I snorted. "Have your own beautiful babies, Chels."

"Yeah, well...someday."

I glanced at Brian and he was pretending to look at something out the window.

"In any case," I said, changing the subject. "I don't know where I want to go to school so moving to Boston is a moot point right now."

"Oh, come on, Ed. You know you want to come back."

I glared at him. "Do you remember what happened at O'Shay's the other night?"

"Which part?"

Chelsea hit him in the chest with the back of her hand. "The part where half the girls in the bar tried to find out if he lived up to his illustrious reputation," she clarified for me.

"Oh. That."

"Yeah. That. I'm not sure I can invite Bella into the viper's lair. They'll try to eat her alive. I wasn't exactly on my best behavior around here."

"Shit, Edward. Everyone has to move on eventually. They'll figure it out and leave you alone."

"Eh, I don't know," Chelsea frowned. "Women can be so catty. Jealousy is not a pretty thing. If Harvard is an option, talk to her. She obviously knows what you were like. Make the decision together." She smirked. "What a concept huh?"

I flipped her off and she snickered. "Besides, from what I can gather, I think she can handle her own."

We all shut our mouths as Bella and Charlie came back.

Bella and Chelsea exchanged numbers before we said goodbye and they were already texting back and forth as I drove us to the New England Aquarium for the afternoon.

I picked up a pizza on the way home and we sat watching Fantasia. It was the only kid friendly DVD we had in the house. Alice had packed up her collection of Disney movies, but apparently forgot that one.

Charlie didn't last long since he hadn't napped that afternoon so about fifteen minutes in, I transplanted him into bed.

"Are you nervous about tomorrow?" Bella asked as I massaged her feet. She had a thick blanket over her and was snuggled into one side of the sofa with her legs stretched out.

"A little. It's always nerve racking doing an interview, but I think I've got the hang of it. I guess we'll see. Are you okay missing work tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I told Luke that there as an emergency and I needed to go out of town for a few days. I have some things that I can work on."

"Can I be one of those things you need to work on?" I said, trying to seduce her. Fuck, it had been five days since I'd been inside the woman. I needed her. Now.

She came at me so quickly that we both fell onto the floor, but even that wasn't enough to stop us.

"God, I want you so fucking badly," I growled, practically ripping the shirt from her body. She leaned up, grabbing my lower lip between her teeth and biting down. She let go when I went to pull my shirt over my head and I could taste the faintest bit of blood. Instantly her lips were on my nipple, licking and sucking and tugging at my barbell. My eyes rolled back in my head and I grimaced as my cock strained painfully against my jeans.

"What about Charlie?" she asked between pants.

"Emmett used to put a bell on my mom and dad's door so that he knew when they were coming out of their room. Saved them all the embarrassment of having them know what his and Rose's fucking sounded like. I put the bell on Charlie's door."

Bella smirked at me. "Planning this were you?"

I chuckled. "Not this, exactly, but yeah, I've fucking missed you. You're body's my happy place, remember?"

"Yeah," she breathed. "I remember."

I got my jeans unzipped and partially pulled over my hips before Bella's hand was on me. I was beginning to think that she was more desperate than me. Her hand gripped me tightly as I wrestled with her jeans. I pulled them, along with her underwear, down as fast as I could. Neither one of us was completely naked when she positioned me at her entrance. I pushed into her causing her to let out a whimper.

"Jesus Christ," I groaned as her pussy walls clamped down on my dick. "You always feel so fucking good, but you have no idea...right now...oh, God."

I couldn't even get a full sentence out. I thrust into her hard and saw her wince.

"Are you okay? What's the matter?"

"The floor."

I looked around and grabbed the blanket that she had been using on the sofa. I pulled out of her and laid the blanket down. It was thick enough to provide a barrier between her back and the floor. Of course, when I saw her kneeling in front of the coffee table trying to finish taking her pants off, I had an entirely different idea.

"Turn around, baby," I said. I managed to finish undressing myself and then licked my lips. I lay on my back and slid my head between her legs. I must have taken her by surprise when I began licking her, because she squeaked and her whole body jerked.

I wrapped my hands around the backs of her lower thighs and sucked her clit into my mouth. She bucked her hips and bit her hand.

"Fuck, that feels incredible," Bella gasped.

I allowed one of my hands to leave her body and wrapped it around my swollen, weeping cock. Having my mouth on her was always a fucking turn on and I needed a little friction before I imploded. As I stroked myself, I worked her pussy with my tongue until she was pulsing all over my face. She leaned forward on the table, trying to catch her breath and I slid out from underneath her.

Curling my naked body over hers I pressed my chest against her back and placed a firm, wet kiss against her neck before pulling my hips back and quickly entering her from behind.

"Do you know how much I fucking love you?" I asked, slowly beginning to push into her. "Do you know what I would do if I lost you? You are my fucking life. I will die before I let anything happen to you." With the force of my next thrust, the table shifted forward far enough that she had to brace herself on the floor. I watched myself sliding back and forth, in and out of her gorgeous fucking pussy, loving the sight of her slickness all over my cock. The slippery sounds were fucking music to my ears. I ran my hand over the curve of her butt cheek. I couldn't help the overwhelming urge to have her that way; for her to surrender herself to me in every way. But I didn't know if she'd let me, if that was something she'd want too. I needed to test the waters. I slid out of her slowly and cautiously rubbed the tip of my dick over her ass. I felt Bella tense and pull away slightly unsure of what I was doing.

"Edward?" She turned her head, looking at me a little nervously.

"Shhhh, baby, I won't," I panted, biting my tongue at just the thought. "But that doesn't mean I don't want to. I want everything with you, but only if you want it too."

I let out an unexpected breath. "Do you? Want it, I mean?"

I continued to run my cock over her entrance, mesmerized by the look of my pre-cum glistening against it. Bella didn't respond.

I finally forced myself to return to her front entrance, making sure to press my cock against her clit a few times before pushing back into her.

"Bella?" I was starting to get nervous. Her head was down and she didn't appear to be responding to me. "Fuck, baby, I'm sorry, you don't have to. It's not something I need, I just..."

"I haven't...ever," she interrupted, finally lifting her head back up. "I...I've never even thought about it."

"I haven't ever done it either. But fucking Christ I want to do it with you, only with you."

"You haven't?" Her voice had increased in pitch as I held onto her hips, just feeling the friction as I moved inside of her.

"No. I...I...it's not something that I could ever give. I never wanted it from anyone else. Just you." I felt the blood swelling the head of my cock and had to pull back a little so I didn't lose myself. "I've never really cared for anyone to trust me enough."

I leaned back onto my heels and pulled her up so she was sitting in my lap backwards. She turned her head, wrapping her hands around my neck and pressing her lips to mine. I opened my mouth and her tongue entered, meeting mine as though they were long lost lovers. They danced erotically around each other, pulling and pushing, hard and soft while she continued to rock me inside of her. When she pulled her face away from mine, her eyes were closed.

"I want you to have me completely. But not here; not now," she whispered. "Maybe when we can get away. When it's just the two of us. When we can take our time."

I moaned lowly in anticipation even though I had no idea when that would be. "Okay."

"I need you to go harder, Edward, please?" she begged. "You're killing me."

_I love it when she asks me for that._

I moved us back into position with her forearms on the floor, her ass against my pubic bone. And then I obliged her. I'd give her anything she asked. Over and over again, I gave her everything I had. My balls slapped against her backside along with our muted grunts, groans, and whimpers. I felt her start to tighten and figured if I was going to push the boundaries a bit, I needed to do it. I didn't want her to be scared, not with me.

I reached down, collecting wetness on my finger and put pressure against her back entrance as I continued to fuck her. She tensed for only a moment and then relaxed again once she realized I couldn't possibly be trying to get my cock in there.

"Is this okay?" I practically begged.

"Yes," she squeaked. I smirked to myself, but stopped abruptly and moaned loudly when she pushed back against me. Fuck, she really did want this. Even when she was nervous about it, she still wanted it.

I closed my eyes and pushed my finger inside. Absorbing the higher pitched moan that Bella let out. It was so fucking tight, even around my finger. It was so intense and more intimate than I could have ever imagined. I had no idea how I was actually going to be able to get in there. I was going to have to make sure she was ready and go really fucking slow. Bella came almost immediately, pulsing around me and triggering my own climax. I emptied myself inside of her as she collapsed to the floor. I yanked the blanket that I had spread out so that it covered our sweaty bodies.

"God damn, baby. Thank you," I sighed, pulling out of her and trying not to drip everywhere.

"You're welcome," she laughed. "But I think I should be thanking you."

"Did you like that?" I asked quietly, pulling her hair back from her face so that I could see her expression. "That was okay?"

Her cheeks pinked and she bit her lip. "More than I thought I would," she admitted.

_Fuck yes! That is a good motherfucking sign._

We laid there for a few minutes before making our way upstairs to the bedroom. She carried our clothes and I walked behind her, draping the blanket around both of us so that we didn't get too cold. Not the easiest way to walk, but it worked.

She went to grab a washcloth, but I stopped her. She smiled as I took it out of her hand and ran it under the warm water. I helped her clean up, running the cloth over her thighs and between her legs. I wanted to take care of her, to make sure she knew just how much I loved and appreciated her. When I was done, I tossed the washcloth in the sink. Bella grabbed my chin and lifted herself onto her toes, peppering my chin, jaw and lips with soft kisses.

We slipped into our pajamas before falling into bed. I pulled her close, running my hands over every inch of exposed skin.

"I love you," she whispered.

"So much."

XXXXXXXX

Monday morning was a little stressed. We had breakfast and coffee at the bakery and then I dropped Bella and Charlie off at the Boston Children's Museum before heading off to Cambridge.

The Harvard interview went just like the others. Similar questions, similar answers. The weight that was off of my shoulders the second I walked out that door though, was so fucking rewarding.

I met Bella and Charlie at the museum shortly when I was finished and we had a late lunch. I was originally supposed to be flying out that night, but when I made Bella and Charlie's flight reservations I changed my outgoing flight to Tuesday morning so that we could all fly together.

That night as Bella sat reading her book in bed and I sat staring at her reading her book in bed, her phone rang.

Bella picked it up. "It's your sister," she announced.

I smirked. "It's your phone."

She flashed me a playful sneer and answered.

"Hello, Alice, what are you doing this fine day?" she smiled. But that smile very quickly faded.

"Oh God, are you kidding me?"

"No. Oh shit."

"What?" I mouthed.

Bella held her finger up.

"Oh my God. Oh fuck. How did it happen?"

"Well, what the fuck _can_ you tell me?"

"No. Shit, I'm sorry, Alice. I'm just freaking the fuck out right now."

"Yeah, okay. We're coming home tomorrow, tell my dad to call me if he finds anything out."

"I will. I love you too."

Bella hung up the phone and just sat there staring at it.

"What the fuck is the matter?" I asked, my heart starting to race.

Bella's face was ashen. I watched her swallow. "Uh...there was...there was a fire."

"What? Where? At the house? At the apartment?" I could hear the panic in my voice.

Bella shook her head. "No."

She didn't elaborate, she just sat there with her mouth open.

"Bella?" I practically shouted.

She shook her head and lifted her eyes to meet mine. "Cammy," she choked.

XXXXXXXX

**AN: Okay, so I warned people on Twi'd, twitter, and FB about this cliffie. We deliberated and debated a lot and apparently, this was better than the ending I had originally so this is the one I went with. By the way, you can now find me on facebook at Littlecat Fanfiction. I know, I know, look at me getting all high tech and shit. :o) But I've made some fab new friends over there who talk really dirty and make me blush, so it was totally worth it!**

**And the Smexin? Well, E & B are a normal, young, healthy, very sexual, very passionate couple. They've hinted at their interest in getting a little kinky before, so this was a natural step for them. Will I go there? I don't know yet.**

**NEXT WEEK: Well, duh, we'll find out what exactly what Cammy has done.**

**DON'T FORGET TO VOTE FOR BOTH THE GOLDEN LEMON AWARDS AND THE WALK OF FAME AWARDS: Links are on my profile page.**


	27. Burning Desire

**AN: I'm gonna try to make this short, but as I tell people all the time, I'm a wordy bitch so 'short' is a relative term for me. **

**Thank you to everyone for reading and reviewing. I don't always address questions in my replies, but it's not b/c I'm ignoring them, it's b/c I can't really answer w/o revealing too much. I do read them all though. Actually, I read them at least twice. :o)**

**Thank you to Mel and Mollie who, on top of everything they do on a regular basis, helped me through this chapter, which was really, really difficult. **

**I have had one of those weeks that just feels like everything is falling down on top of you and you are completely powerless to stop it so I am completely surprised that this chapter is even going up today, but I will always do my best to try to stick to the posting schedule. **

**The usual disclaimer applies**

**XXXXXXXXX**

Chapter 25: Burning Desire

BPOV

"It's your sister."

"It's your phone," he said, smirking all sexy like. For a moment I thought about ignoring the phone call and jumping him. He had been staring at me for the last half hour, watching my every minuscule move as I sat reading. I knew he was thinking about it, especially after last night. But as another ring echoed through the room, I decided that I should probably answer it.

I made a face at him and pressed the answer button.

"Hello, Alice, what are you doing this fine day?" I asked sweetly.

"_Oh, thank Jesus, Bella. I was worried you wouldn't answer. You will never believe what is happening." She didn't wait for me to ask any sort of a question. Her voice was high pitched and completely freaked out. "Your dad called about half hour ago looking for Edward's cell number. He said he tried to reach you earlier, but couldn't._"

I tried to figure out when he would have called. This was the first time I had heard my cell ring all night.

"_Apparently, he and a couple of his guys got called into Port Angeles to help out with this huge fire investigation. A whole apartment building completely lit up._"

"Oh God, are you kidding me?"

"_Yeah. He said it was horrible. There were people just standing in the street in their bare feet watching their homes go up in flames._"

"No! Oh shit!"

"What?" Edward asked silently.

I held up my finger, asking him to wait a second.

"_Yeah, and guess who lives in the fucking building_?"

Again, she didn't wait for me to answer.

"_Camille Jenks. Isn't that the crazy Cammy chick who works with you? The one you think broke into your apartment? The one Edward. . . ._"

She didn't finish her sentence. I had confided in Alice about everything I thought Cammy was doing. This, of course, was all after Edward had admitted to her that he had slept with the psychopath the night he found out about Charlie. Alice had simply rolled her eyes and called him an , as I packed for the trip to Boston, I explained my suspicions; that Cammy had been the one to tear apart the apartment. Why? I had no fucking clue.

My heart jumped up into my throat and started beating wildly. What the hell did this mean? Was it all just one big fat coincidence? What had happened that my father found it so necessary to get ahold of me? Of course, I didn't voice any of that out loud.

"Oh my God. Oh fuck. How did it happen?"

"_I don't know. I can't tell you that._"

"Well, what the fuck can you tell me?"

"_Stop yelling at me. I'm telling you everything I can. All I know is what your dad told me in the three minutes he had me on the phone. They've been going over a checklist of the occupants. He said Cammy is the only resident unaccounted for and there's at least one body. He asked me to call you and Edward ASAP._"

"Shit, I'm sorry, Alice. I'm just freaking the fuck out right now."

"_I know you are. I'm sorry too, Bella. I know you guys are trying to get away from all this shit, but your dad wants you home._"

Shit! Why?

"Yeah, okay. We're coming home tomorrow, tell my dad to call me if he finds anything out."

"_Of course. I love you. Give Edward and Charlie hugs from me_."

"I will. I love you too."

I hit the end call button, but I couldn't wrap my mind entirely around what she had said.

"What the fuck is the matter?" Edward growled.

I felt sick and yet at the same time, a sense of relief was rolling over me. "Uh...there was...there was a fire."

"What? Where? At the house? At the apartment?"

"No," I whimpered.

"Bella?" he yelled.

I finally started to get my thoughts together. "Cammy."

"What about her? What did she do?"

"There was a fire at her apartment building. They found a body."

"Hers?" Edward's voice had gone up a notch.

I shrugged. "I don't know." I relayed what Alice had told me almost word for word, but it didn't make any more sense the second time.

"Fuck!" Edward breathed out, rubbing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose.

I looked over at him. "Are we all packed for tomorrow?"

"There are a few things here and there, but yeah, pretty much." He tugged at my arm and I scooted closer to him and lay down. His arms were instantly around me, providing warmth and comfort.

"My dad wants us to come home."

"Okay. Well, we're on a morning flight, that's about the best we can do right now."

I nodded slightly and closed my eyes. They felt so heavy that I couldn't even be bothered to open them again. Instead, I allowed the feel of Edward's chest rising and falling against my back to lull me into sleep.

XXXXXX

I have to say that the flight home was much easier than the flight over. Having Edward help me keep Charlie occupied was a lifesaver. We sat him in the seat between us. I watched as he tried to teach him rock, paper scissors and laughed when Charlie's little thumb kept sliding out expertly from under his during thumb wars.

"You're a slippery little sucker," Edward chuckled ruffling Charlie's hair. Charlie grinned proudly.

When he started showing signs of being tired, we moved him to the window seat wrapped up in his blankie, a pillow between his head and the airplane wall. With our son snoring slightly next to me, I leaned into Edward. He put his arm around my shoulders and pressed his lips against my head.

"It's gonna be fine, baby," he murmured gently, rubbing his hand up and down my arm.

"How do you know?"

"If she's gone, then at least she can't hurt us anymore."

"I really just want her to be gone." I whispered almost to myself.

Edward didn't say anything for a minute or two. He just held me tighter.

"I know that sounds awful, but she's so fucked up. I have no doubt that she's the one who erased Luke's data files. And your car and the apartment. I just. . ."

"I understand that, baby. I do too," Edward soothed. "I don't think it makes us horrible people. If anything, it makes us human."

He put a finger under my chin and lifted it, gently brushing his lips across mine before taking my lower lip and sucking on it. I moaned a little and felt him smile before moving his mouth to my ear.

"This is neither the time nor the place for those sounds," he purred. I nodded and he pulled back, smiling crookedly and kissing my nose. I was almost in awe that he could be so composed about the whole thing and briefly wondered if it was all a show. Was he really as collected as he appeared or was he being strong for my sake? Either way, I couldn't help but appreciate having him to lean on.

I rested my head against his chest and played with the collar of his shirt, occasionally reaching up and scratching the hair at nape of his neck. It made me smile when he tilted his neck to try and encourage my fingers to explore a little more of his skin.

Charlie woke up about half an hour before the plane landed in Chicago. We walked quickly to the other side of the terminal and then spent an hour running him up and down the moving sidewalks in an attempt to exhaust at least a small amount of the energy that he had regained from his two hour nap. It was completely futile though. He bounced up and down from take-off to touch-down.

Edward looked a little exasperated at times, but he handled it well. When I tried to demand that Charlie sit down and be quiet for the fiftieth time, Edward took him back to the steward's lounge and let him jump around back there.

By the time we reached SEA-TAC, my nerves were completely shot. I gripped Edward's hand tightly as he carried Charlie on his other forearm towards the baggage check. He glanced over at me and furrowed his eyebrows.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine," I grumbled, trying not to let my agitation and exhaustion turn me into a raving bitch.

"Where did you park?" Edward asked as we grabbed his bag off the belt.

"Uh. . . ."

_Shit. Where did I park?_

I had been in such a fucked up state of mind that I hadn't really been paying attention.

"Bella?"

"I don't remember," I admitted.

"What do you mean you don't remember?" Edward looked at me in disbelief.

"I don't fucking remember," I growled.

"Wally Park? Master Park? You have to remember something."

I squinted, trying to conjure some inkling of a memory.

"God damn it, Bella. How do you not remember where you parked the fu. . ." We heard a tiny little sneeze and Edward and I glanced over at Charlie who was wiping his nose with his sleeve and watching our interaction with his lip in between his teeth.

"I'm sorry," I said quietly. "Just give me a second." Apparently Edward's nerves had also been been through the ringer today, he was just a little bit better at hiding it.

He pulled me to him, wrapping an arm around my waist and breathing against my neck. This had become something he liked to do this when we argued in front of Charlie. He said that Carlisle and Esme had done it when he was little and it helped him get over the fear that had been instilled in him from listening to Esme and Edward Sr. fight.

Being that I studied child behavior, I knew that it was important for Charlie to see that even though we sometimes fought, we still loved each other. Being a child of divorce, it was even more important. It made me extremely happy to know that, as parents, we were on the same page.

"I think that I parked in the garage. Long-term? I wasn't sure whether three days was considered long or short and I didn't want to get the car towed, but I was in a hurry."

Edward chuckled and let me go. "They wouldn't have towed the car, baby, it just costs more to park in short term."

I stared at him, five seconds ago he was mad at me and now he was laughing. I couldn't help but be amazed at how far we had come in a matter of months.

"Well I didn't know that," I huffed in a playful pout. "Before Saturday, I hadn't been on a plane since I was a kid."

"We're going to have to fix that," he murmured, putting his hand on my hip. "I'll take you anywhere you want to go." He smirked at me and I saw his tongue dart out to wet his lower lip.

The double entendre made me smile. Luckily, with the lack of tension in the air, Charlie's attention had been diverted to a little girl who was throwing a screaming fit across the room.

"Promise?" I grinned, waggling my eyebrows at him.

Edward hummed and pushed me forward, pinching my butt and making me jump. I slapped his arm before grabbing Charlie's hand. "Do you remember where we parked, sweetie?"

"Number four," Charlie chirped, holding up three fingers.

Ah, yes. I had wanted to park on the floor with the skywalk so that I remembered where I parked.

"Smart boy," I smiled.

It still took us about twenty minutes to find the car, but eventually we were settled in and heading home. I let Edward drive my car. My eyes felt heavy and I didn't even want to take the chance of driving in that state.

"I'm gonna call my dad and let him know we're on our way," I said, reaching into my purse and grabbing my phone. I looked at my phone and saw that I had three missed calls and two messages. Two of the calls were from my dad and the other from an unknown number.

"Why the hell are these just coming through now?" I asked no one in particular.

Edward just shrugged. "Maybe you need to upgrade your service."

His solution to everything. If it's not fast enough, shiny enough, new enough, get a new one.

"I don't need new service, I need the one that I have to work," I scowled.

I quickly listened to the messages, both from my father asking me to call him as soon as possible.

I called the home phone first. I don't know why, I was fairly certain that my dad was at the station. I was more than surprised when he actually answered.

"Oh, hey, dad."

"_Bella,_" my dad said tiredly. "_Are you all landed?_"

"Yeah, we're in the car now. We should be home in about three, three and a half hours depending on how many times we have to stop."

I looked back at Charlie who was drinking water from his sippy cup and staring out the window.

"Do you have any information?" I asked turning back around and lowering my voice.

I saw Edward angle his head so that he could hear at least my end of the conversation.

My dad was quiet. "_Yeah, Bells, I do, but I think we should talk about it later_."

"Can you just tell me if it was her?"

"_Sweetheart, I'll explain everything when you get home, okay. After Charlie goes down._"

I wanted to protest, but something in my dad's voice stopped me. "Okay. I'll call you when we get to the apartment."

"_The apartment is still a wreck, Bells. Head to Esme and Carlisle's and we'll talk there, okay._"

I nodded even though I knew he couldn't see me.

"Anything?" Edward asked.

I shrugged. "Something, but he didn't want to talk about it over the phone."

"That doesn't sound good."

The drive seemed a lot longer than usual. We stopped for a quick bite to eat once we got off the ferry at Bainbridge Island and then had to stop two more times because Charlie had to pee. I dozed off here and there as Edward had put some classical music on, but as we pulled into the driveway at just after seven, I almost felt like it had gone too fast. Even though I wanted to know what had happened, I was dreading it all the same.

"Wow," Edward gasped, staring at his new BMW. "That's a gorgeous car."

I smiled. "You wanna go look at it?"

He shook his head. "I'll look at it tomorrow in the light."

Carlisle and Esme were the only ones home since Alice and Jasper had started staying at their new house. When we walked through the door, Esme was quick to wrap us all up in her arms as though she hadn't seen us in weeks.

She bent down, snuggling Charlie before letting him go to jump into Carlisle's arms.

"How was everything? Good?"

Edward nodded. "It was good, Ma, thank you."

"Your interviews? How'd they go?"

She pulled me towards the kitchen, apparently expecting Edward to follow, which of course, he did.

"They were difficult, but I survived."

"Is that all I'm going to get out of you?" Esme huffed, pulling a chair out for me and glaring at Edward. Carlisle had Charlie sitting on the island and thought he was being sneaky about slipping him those mini-marshmallows as he made him a cup of hot cocoa.

I caught his eye and he flashed me a cheeky grin. Sometimes I forgot that Edward and Carlisle weren't biologically father and son. They had so many of the same mannerisms.

"I don't know what to tell you, mom. I went in, they asked me a bunch of questions, I shook a bunch of hands and then I left. I have no clue how it actually went."

Esme set a cup of coffee down on the table. "It's decaf, sweetheart. I know you've had a long day."

"Thanks, Esme," I sighed, inhaling the delicious aroma.

Her hand ran down the back of my head. "My pleasure, darling," she smiled as she went to retrieve a cup for Edward.

"Oh, I need to call my dad," I said, remembering the conversation that had been on my mind for the last three hours. I picked up my steaming mug and left the room only for a few moments. My dad said he'd be over in about an hour, long enough for us to put Charlie to bed.

"So how were Brian and Chelsea?" Esme was asking as I returned to the kitchen.

Edward chuckled. "As ridiculous as ever."

Esme smiled and shoved Edward's shoulder. "Oh, they're such a cute couple. They've always been so affectionate and giddy with each other."

"They're good. I think Chelsea and Bella are smitten with each other," he teased.

I pursed my lips, not denying the fact that I really had clicked with Chelsea.

"Oh, she's a good girl, Bella. I can imagine that you and she would get along. She's a psychiatric nurse."

"Yeah, that's what she was saying," I nodded, sipping on my coffee. "I like her. She doesn't seem like the type to put up with any shit," I looked sideways at Edward. He was looking up at a spot on ceiling and trying not to smile. Chelsea had told me about some of his and Brian's antics over the years including how she reamed them out for using gorilla glue to attach random items to the walls, floors, and ceiling of her apartment after a night of heavy drinking. Bastards, I would have been pissed too.

"Hmmm," Esme hummed in agreement. "Are there any signs of wedding bells?"

Edward choked on his coffee and shook his head. "He's dragging his feet. And before you ask, I don't know why and it's none of my business."

"Well, you're a wealth of information aren't you?" Esme joked.

Edward laughed. "It's not my place to feed your gossip, mom."

Esme huffed in irritation, but the twinkle in her eyes and the smile threatening the corners of her mouth told me she was anything but.

I loved watching him interact with his parents in such a playful manner. It made me think about how Charlie and I would be as he grew older. I hoped that we would be close just as we were now. I cherished the moments when he'd crawl into my lap and randomly pepper me with kisses and 'I love you, mommys'. There was always that fear that I would screw him up somehow. Edward and I were living proof that even kids with good parents could choose the wrong paths and make the wrong decisions.

"Would you like me to put Charlie down?" Esme asked, changing the topic as Charlie let out a huge yawn.

"I'm not tired," he mumbled, already half asleep.

"You're never tired," Carlisle laughed tweaking his nose.

It was fairly early, but seeing as Charlie had spent the last three nights adjusting to East coast time, it was probably past his bedtime.

"That would be wonderful, Esme. Thank you."

We said our goodnights and Esme and Carlisle took Charlie up.

"I'm so tired," I whined, leaning my head against Edward's shoulder.

"Why don't we call your dad and ask him to come tomorrow."

"We gotta go back to work tomorrow."

Edward groaned.

"Besides, aren't you even a little bit curious?"

"I'm really fucking curious, but I can wait."

I shook my head. "No, I need to know now."

Twenty minutes later, my dad was standing at the door.

"Hi, Daddy," I said throwing my arms around him. It didn't matter how old I was, his hugs would always give me comfort.

"Hi, sweetheart. How was your trip?"

"It was, um, good." I looked at Edward over my dad's shoulder and he winked at me, making me blush. He could be so fucking inappropriate at times.

We settled into the living room. Edward got himself and my dad a beer and a glass of water for me.

"So?" I asked, my anxiety finally overwhelming me.

My dad took a deep breath. "They found her."

"Cammy?"

He cleared his throat and frowned. "Yeah."

"Is she. . . . ?"

My dad nodded. "She is. The fire originated in her apartment. It was a too hot for the firefighters to get in there right away. By the time they did, she was already dead."

I flinched at the actually verbal confirmation of her death. I had all sorts of questions, but I was almost afraid to ask.

"Did she suffer?" Edward asked, stealing one of those questions right out of my brain.

"I have no idea," my dad shrugged. "It's still under investigation and they need to do an autopsy to determine the cause of death."

"How the hell did it happen?"

My dad ran his hand over his face. "Bells, there really isn't very much I can tell you at this point. All I know is that there was nothing salvageable, everything in that apartment, and several others, was completely destroyed."

"Everything?" I asked, looking over at Edward. He met my gaze and an understanding passed between us.

"Yeah, everything. Nothing that you told me can be confirmed or denied. If there was any evidence, it's gone."

"Shit," I swore. I didn't know how to feel about this news. On the one hand, I wanted her to be held accountable for what she had done, even in death. I wanted the world to know exactly who she was. I wanted to know exactly what the fuck she had done to my boyfriend. But on the other hand, it was over. She was over. I didn't have to worry anymore; waiting for her to do something to destroy us."

My dad thumped his fingers against the table. "Edward, son, I need to ask you a question."

Edward looked up at him in confusion.

"Do you know anything about this fire?"

Edward furrowed his brow. "How would I. . .?"

"I have to ask."

"No. I didn't know anything about it until last night when Alice called Bella."

My father let out a breath. "Good, I didn't think that you did, but I needed to ask." He slid an envelope across the table to me. "You gave these to me as a daughter asking her father's opinion on a very sensitive subject matter. Seeing as I can't really tell who the girl in them is, I'm just going to give them back to you. They are more personal than anything else and I can't really see how they would benefit the investigation."

I took the envelope and slid it towards Edward. He refused to touch it. I knew that I never wanted to see them, but I still didn't know if Edward did. Once he made the decision, I wanted them gone; shredded, torched, I didn't care as long as I never had to worry about them again.

"As far as I'm concerned, the Port Angeles police and fire investigation squad can handle this on their own from here on out."

I stared at my father. The look of steely determination on his face was astounding.

"That being said," he frowned. "I had to tell them that you both knew her. They'll probably be calling you in tomorrow to rule you out as possible suspects."

"Do you really think it wasn't an accident?" Edward asked, startling me.

"That's up to them to determine. I would like to believe that it wasn't, but if what you said was true, then there really is no telling."

"You didn't tell them what you knew?"

"I didn't need to. The neighbors were all too eager to tell the PA sheriff about all the men she traipsed in and out of that apartment; the screaming, the fighting. Besides, like I said, I have no proof of anything. I'd lose a little bit of credibility if I told them that I heard from my. . . . from Edward, who heard from Bella, who heard from her boss. . . Well, you get the point."

Yes, I guess I did. I'm not sure that gossip would be a very good source of information.

"I have to warn you, Bells. Your boss is also on their list. I believe they talked to him today."

"Luke? They think Luke might have done this."

My dad shook his head. "I only heard bits and pieces, but no. He has an air tight alibi. If I even suspected he was guilty, there would be no way I would let you go into work again."

"Me neither," Edward growled.

This was going to make for an interesting conversation at work in the morning.

"Okay, time for me to get home. I have to be in at the station by five-thirty tomorrow and I need to get some sleep." Dad stood up and clapped Edward on the back.

"How'd your interviews go, son?"

This was new. It was the second time he'd done it; called Edward 'son'.

"I think they went fine, sir," Edward said, his eyes flickering to me briefly before returning to my dad. Apparently he had noticed the same thing.

"Good, good."

We walked my father to the door and said our goodnights before heading up the stairs to get ready for bed. I still had my overnight bag so I didn't have to go back to the apartment for anything. Edward pushed open his bedroom door and wandered in, but I stopped in the doorway.

I could feel my heart rate increase as I stood, staring at his bed. Edward pulled a pair of pajama pants from his dresser and turned to face me. I can only imagine what my face looked like.

"Jesus Christ, Bella, what's the matter?" he asked, his face reflecting confusion and worry.

I felt my teeth pierce the flesh on the inside of my lip and instantly recognized the coppery taste that flowed over my tongue.

"Oh, shit, baby I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking," Edward sighed, taking two long steps towards me and wrapping his strong arms around my shoulders.

"It's okay, I'm okay," I said, taking in a few short breaths.

"Bella, if you don't want to sleep here, we can sleep in the guest room, it's not a problem."

I shook my head, I needed to do this. It was a completely irrational fear. "I'll be fine."

"Baby," he whispered.

"I'll be fine, Edward," I assured softly.

It's not like anything was the same. The bed was covered in white sheets. A fairly new blue and brown striped comforter sat neatly over the top. And things were so different now.

Edward held my hand and walked me to the bed. I sat down and watched as he stripped out of his clothes and slipped on his pajamas. My eyes roamed over his body, taking in the black ink of his tattoo before scanning his bare chest. His chiseled pecs with their silver adornment, the toned abs and narrow hips that formed a perfect V shape. He was simply perfection.

I met his eyes. Normally, if he had caught me ogling him like that, I would have seen lust and passion in his eyes. But at that moment, all I saw was love and understanding.

"Come on, love, let's get ready for bed." He held out his hand for me again and kissed me softly when I rose.

We finished getting ready for bed, Edward taking my pajamas out of my hand and giving me one of his t-shirts to sleep in instead. I slipped it over my head and Edward bent down, dragging my panties down my legs and then running his hands up and down the backs of my thighs before standing up again. He pulled the sheets back and we climbed in together.

His body instantly molded around mine. Holding me close and tight. His breath was warm on my ear as he whispered softly his adoration and love. I could feel him growing hard against me, but he never pursued his need. He simply cradled me as though I was the most precious thing in his world.

The anxiety of where we were began to fade away; replaced by something entirely new. This wasn't the place that held so many painful memories for me; not anymore.

Sometime in the night, I rolled over in Edward's arms. His hands glided over my naked backside and up my spine, pulling the shirt up with it until I was naked. I removed Edward's pants and straddled him, lowering myself onto his thick length. We made love slowly, passionately. He allowed me to take as much as I could before giving in and emptying himself inside of me. I swallowed his grunts and he muffled my cries. It was the most tender of moments we had ever had. We lay there, facing each other silently until we both drifted back into sleep, not stirring again until we heard a soft knock on the door in the morning.

Esme cracked the door open. "I'm sorry," she apologized, "but it's seven."

"Thanks, mom," Edward groaned.

I heard the door click shut and Edward shifted his morning wood away from where it was poking me in the thigh.

His lips met my forehead and he sighed. "Back to the grindstone, I guess."

I reluctantly removed myself from his embrace and stood up, stretching my naked body and padding to the bathroom.

XXXXXX

"I need a fucking vacation," I said after we had dropped Charlie off at pre-school. We were driving the BMW, but I was dropping Edward off and parking it at the University office. There were cameras in the parking lot and if I opened the blinds, I could actually see it from my desk. Even with Cammy gone, Edward wasn't taking any chances. "A real one," I added.

"A few more weeks and then you're done, right? I'm taking a month off at Christmas. We can go somewhere."

I nodded and stepped out of the car to switch places with him once we had reached the clinic.

"Maybe we can take Charlie to a real beach," Edward said, bending his head to capture my mouth in a kiss. "And we still have Vail. I've got all sorts of things I want to show you in Vail." He smiled crookedly and I couldn't help but melt a little. He always seemed to know exactly what I needed.

"I'd like that," I sighed, leaning my head against his chest before pulling away and climbing into the driver's seat.

"I'll pick you up at four."

I walked into my office tentatively.

_This is going to be really fucking weird._

Luke was sitting at his desk. His eyes were trained on his computer, but they weren't focused. They held a faraway look as if he were completely lost inside his head.

I cleared my throat softly as I entered the room and he glanced up at me.

"Good morning, Bella," he said almost robotically.

I set everything down on my desk and then leaned against the edge.

"I guess you've heard?"

I nodded. "My dad got called in on the investigation. He called us while we were still in Boston. Are you okay?"

Luke shrugged. "I don't know how I'm supposed to feel. The woman was a nightmare, but at one point, I really did care about her."

I started to wrinkle my nose in disgust, but caught myself and pretended to itch my nose instead.

"I talked to the cops yesterday. They asked me where I was at the time of the fire, what her state of mind was. They asked me if there had been any problems."

"And what did you tell them?" I asked nervously. My father may not have divulged anything too damaging, but Luke? He certainly could have.

"I told them that we had dated briefly. That it ended because I found out she was sleeping with other men. That she had been causing trouble here at the office, but that she didn't seem suicidal."

He looked up at me and met my eyes. "I had to tell them about you and Edward. I'm sorry, Bella, I didn't have a choice."

I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. "It's okay, Luke. We figured as much."

"I didn't tell them all that much, I don't honestly know anything, Bella. I don't know what she was doing with those photos and from what I understand, everything in that apartment was charred beyond recognition, including. . . . They had to use fucking dental records. He choked a little when he said it.

I grimaced. This was more than I wanted to know.

"Her ex-husband and his new wife were at the station. I didn't hear what he said, but he didn't look upset at all. He almost looked relieved."

"God, I just. . . . thank God my parents were having a family dinner. Normally I would have been home alone. They would have thought that I. . . that I could have done that."

"Luke, why don't you take a few days off," I suggested, taking in the deep purple bruises under his eyes.

"And do what?" he snapped. "Think about it some more? I've already thought about it more than I wanted to. Besides, our final report and presentation is December seventh. If we want to be done by then, we need to start putting it all together."

I nodded. I understood his need to throw himself into his work. It was probably keeping him sane.

We spent the rest of the day working in virtual silence. I turned on my iPod and listened to music all day to keep the quiet from killing me.

About mid-day, we were interrupted by a strong knock on the door. I looked up and saw a man in a suit standing in the doorway followed by a uniformed police officer.

"Isabella Swan?"

"That's me." I started to stand up, but Luke stopped me.

"It's okay, Bella, I'm going to go get some lunch, you can stay in here. . . if you like." He looked up at the investigator who nodded.

I sat back down and motioned for the investigator to come in and sit down. He pulled a chair up next to my desk. The uniformed officer continued to stand at the door.

"Good Afternoon, Miss Swan," he said in a strong, but non-aggressive tone. "I'm Detective Benjamin Laurent. I guess you know why I'm here?"

"Yes, I do."

"I just have a couple of questions for you. I know that you have been out of town for the last several days, but we do need a few things clarified."

I nodded.

"What was your relationship with Camille Jenks?"

I scoffed. "I didn't have a relationship with her. We work together." I looked up and bit my lip. "Well, worked."

"But she had a relationship with your boyfriend, Edward Cullen." It wasn't a question.

I stared at him coldly. I knew that this was coming, but hearing him call what she did to him a relationship made my blood boil.

"Ms. Jenks had a. . . .night with him over the summer."

"They had a sexual relationship?"

"No." I laughed humorlessly in an attempt not to bite his head off. "Not a relationship. We don't know what happened. He can't remember anything."

Detective Laurent furrowed his brow. "Can't remember anything?"

"No, nothing. He went to the bar where she worked and the next thing he knew he was waking up in her bed."

"And how did you react to that?"

"I didn't. We weren't in a relationship at the time. I didn't find out until the day they met here at the office."

"And you were angry?"

"I was upset, yes. Not necessarily angry. I knew she'd rub it in my face. But like I said, we weren't a couple so. . ."

Detective Laurent looked down at the pad of paper in his hand.

"You have a child with Mr. Cullen and you weren't together?"

"That's a long story. One that has nothing to do with Cammy or whatever the hell she was doing."

I didn't mean to snap at him, but seriously, how Charlie came about was none of his business.

"Edward and I started dating months after his night with her. It had no bearing on our relationship."

"And you left on Saturday morning to head to Boston?"

"Yes. Edward was going through his medical school interviews. Our apartment got broken into and we decided that in order for him to concentrate on his interviews, that our son and I would join him."

"And the Forks Police Department is handling that break-in?"

I nodded silently.

Detective Laurent reached into his pocket and handed me a card. "Thank you Ms. Swan. I appreciate your cooperation."

He said this like I really had some sort of option. I waved him out and stuck my ear buds back in. I had lost my appetite.

When it was time to pick up Charlie, I headed over to the pre-school. We went to the coffee shop and I ordered him a hot chocolate as we sat and waited for four o'clock to come around.

As Charlie slurped at his cup, I looked around at the people surrounding us. There were two older women chattering together and eating scones, a teenage couple giggling and flirting, and a businessman reading a newspaper. I stared at him. Or rather, I stared at the paper he was holding. On the front of it was a picture of a building on fire. The headline in dark bold print read.

**FIRE DESTROYS APARTMENT BUILDING: 1 DEAD 4 INJURED**

I swallowed, trying to force my latte to stay down. When I finally ripped my eyes away, they darted to the next table where a this guy, probably not much older than me, caught my attention. He smiled at me and winked. He was attractive, I guess. Nothing compared to Edward, but I could certainly appreciate that other women would have reacted to him. At the same time, the tiny hairs on my arms and the back of my neck started prickling. Something about him creeped me out and I looked away quickly without returning his smile.

I glanced down at my watch. Noticing the time, I gathered up our things. The businessman was doing the same. He set the paper down on the table and turned to leave. As I passed by the table, I snatched up the front page section and folded it up, shoving it into my shoulder bag. I didn't know if I'd ever read it, but I decided that if morbid curiosity got the better of me, I should at least have it just in case.

After picking up Edward, we drove home. My dad was going to take Charlie to the diner while Edward and I cleaned up the apartment and assessed the destruction. We still had to give the police a full list of items that we thought might be missing. I told him about Detective Laurent. Apparently, he had also stopped by the clinic to talk to Edward. I mentioned Luke's reaction, and his apparent melancholy over her death. He didn't understand.

"We should all be throwing a fucking party," he said, after we dropped Charlie off.

"Edward!" I scolded.

"Look, Bella, I'm not going to mourn that psycho. If she was after any of those other guys like she was after me, then the police are going to have a really fucking long list of suspects."

"Would you have killed her if you'd had the chance?"

"No, of course not. But there was only so much she could have done to me; to us. If she had openly threatened you or Charlie, I don't know, maybe I would have been capable of something like that. Can we please stop talking about this? I'm done with it. It's over."

He threaded his hand with mine and kissed my knuckles.

I sighed. "Yeah, you're right. It's over."

XXXXXXXX

EPOV

I stood in the doorway of our bedroom with my mouth open.

_How the fuck did this happen?_

Bella was in Charlie's room, going through his things and trying to figure out what, if anything, was actually missing. It was always hard to tell because his shit was everywhere.

I pinched the bridge of my nose.

_What a fucking headache_.

The whole day had been a headache. From the moment I got into the clinic, people had been on my ass. Dr. Oleander, Heidi, they were all asking for one thing after another. It was possible that, after a week off, that I had just forgotten what it was like to be in a busy medical office, but fuck, it was exhausting. Then, just before lunch, Detective Laurent walked through the doors. I have to say that it was kind of funny to see a few of the petty criminals scatter as he and another cop approached the front desk.

They asked me question after question about my "relationship" with Cammy. What-the-fuck-ever. I explained how that one night happened and then that she worked with Bella. What else was there to tell? She really hadn't fucked with me much and I hadn't even seen the pictures so, in reality, I couldn't comment on them. He handed me his card and said he'd be in touch if he had any further questions.

Staring at the mess in front of me, I didn't even know where to start. I entered the room tentatively. There was glass all over the floor. Luckily, I hadn't taken off my shoes so I wasn't worried about stepping on it, but I didn't want to grind it into the rug if I could help it.

I started by picking up some of the clothes. Holding them up, I saw that the majority of them were Bella's. It looked like someone had taken scissors to them, or a knife. A few of my clothes were also ripped apart, but not nearly as many. I ran to the laundry room and grabbed a basket to put the destroyed clothes in. That way we could record them and submit a copy to the insurance company.

I lifted a blouse from the dresser and nearly shit myself. The words "**FUCK YOU**" were carved deeply into the wood. I briefly wondered if the Chief's men had seen that or if it had been overlooked.

"Bella?" I shouted. "Can you bring me the camera?"

"Yeah," she yelled back. I heard her feet coming down the hallway.

"Don't come in here, baby," I warned, pointing down to her bare feet. "There's glass fucking everywhere."

"Yeah, I know," she said holding out her hand.

I also had another reason that I didn't want her in there. I knew she'd see it eventually, but I figured if I told her before she saw it, the shock of such a blatant symbol of aggression wouldn't be as abrupt.

"Thanks. Any headway in there?"

She shrugged. "Hard to tell. I'm working on it. Why the fuck is it all my clothes?" she growled, leaning over and lifting her Rolling Stones t-shirt out of the basket between her thumb and forefinger. "Shit, this was my favorite."

"I don't know, baby," I sighed. "I'll find you another one, okay? You're probably going to have to go get some new clothes though. There's not a whole lot that's salvageable," I grimaced as I took in her irritated expression.

She tossed the shirt back down and turned around, stomping loudly and swearing back down the hallway.

I took a picture of the words along with some of the other damage. I made my way through the room as quickly as I could. After the clothes, I straightened up the mattress which had been flipped over and sliced right down the middle, some of the foam center pulled out. I grabbed the sheets and threw them into the hallway. They would have to be thrown out.

I went back to the far side of the room and picked up some of the books that had been pulled off the bookshelves, throwing the ones that were ripped apart into my basket so that I could make a note of the names to replace them. I also picked up one of the pillows that was lying on the floor and tossed it onto the naked mattress. Thank God Bella had insisted on getting the hypo-allergenic pillows. If they had been down, we would have had fucking feathers everywhere.

I picked up a few knick knacks and opened the drawer to the bedside table to throw them inside. When I looked down, there was a used condom in the corner.

Fuck, when was the last time Bella and I used one of those? Had that been there for weeks? Gross.

I went into the bathroom and grabbed some tissue, picking the rubber up and holding it away from me before tossing it into the trash can.

"Fucking disgusting," I grumbled as I washed my hands.

_God I am so happy that we don't have to use those anymore._

I finished cleaning everything up, cleaning the fingerprint dust, sweeping the wood floors and vacuuming up as much of the glass as possible from the area rug.

"Baby I want to get the rug professionally cleaned before we move back in here," I said as I entered the kitchen, where Bella was breaking open a bottle of wine.

"How fast can we get them in here?"

I wrapped my arms around her waist, and pushed my chin into her shoulder. She poured the wine into two glasses and put one up to her mouth, tasting it and letting out a soft sigh.

"Eager to have a little privacy after only one night?" I teased, swaying us back and forth.

Bella giggled, setting down the glass and turning around to face me. "Something like that," she murmured as she pressed her lips against mine. I swept my tongue over her lower lip. The rich flavor of the wine only added to the sweetness that was my girl and I moaned.

"The way you taste right now makes me want to strip you naked and fuck you on the counter top."

Bella opened her mouth and I took the opportunity to claim it with my own. She met me half way and our tongues danced erotically around each other; slowly, languidly. If there were such a thing as tongue porn, this would certainly win some sort of award.

"I have a feeling I could taste like fried liver and you'd still want to strip me naked and fuck me on the counter top," Bella chuckled when she pulled away to catch her breath.

"Mmmm, fried liver, so sexy," I breathed against her soft skin. I pushed my hips forward, letting her feel just how turned on I was. Like she didn't know already.

I let my thumbs brush over her hip bones, once, twice, three times, before I hooked them into her waistband. I lowered myself to my knees, keeping my eyes trained on her face as I slid her pants and underwear down her creamy thighs, leaving her bare directly in front of my face. She grabbed her wine glass, tipped her head back, and took a large gulp. A little drop escaped and trickled down her chin. I stood up quickly dragging my tongue over the drip and then capturing her mouth once again.

Taking a quick sip from her wine glass, I returned to my position on the floor and lifted her leg so that it hung over my shoulder.

"Fuck," I growled as I darted my tongue out to flick against her very swollen little clit. I felt her jerk a little at the contact, but she steadied herself with one hand on the counter and one on the back of my head.

"Is the door locked?" Bella gasped as I started drawing wet figure eights over her hot spot.

"Mmmhmm." I wasn't about to stop what I was doing to actually use words. She tasted so fucking good.

"Are you sure?" she squeaked.

Apparently I needed to show her just how sure I was. I plunged into her, intent on giving her the best tongue fucking that she'd ever had.

"Unf, Edward," she cried out, gripping the back of my head tightly. Her knee buckled slightly and I had to clamp my hand around her upper thigh to support her until she regained herself.

"Oh, oh God. Ah, oh, Fuck."

I grinned up at her, my tongue still thrusting, my thumb making its way to where she needed friction. I watched her eyes roll back into her head and her mouth fall open as she tried to control the force of her impending orgasm.

I was torn between wanting her to cum on my face and wanting to stand up and impale her so she could cum on my cock. I was so fucking turned on it would probably only take me a few thrusts before I was joining her.

"Get up here and fuck me," she demanded, sliding her leg from my shoulder and yanking me upwards. I stood quickly, struggling with my belt. She slapped my hands away and I crashed my mouth against hers as her hands expertly unbuckled me, letting my jeans drop to the floor. I shoved my boxers down, but didn't bother stepping out of them before I lifted her ass up to the edge of the granite and did just as I had imagined. Her warmth encapsulated me. I pulled her forward so that I was holding her up almost entirely. She leaned back, resting her elbows on the counter, mewling with each and every thrust.

I could feel beads of sweat dripping down my forehead, but I couldn't tear my eyes from the sight in front of me. The site of my cock, covered in essence of Bella, sliding in and out of her body fluidly, rapidly. I made sure that my pelvis hit her clit every time since my hands were too busy holding her up. We both were swollen, throbbing, and finally pulsing together. I leaned over her, burying myself as deep as I could, resting my forehead against hers as we grunted and cursed our way through our orgasms.

"Oh, you fuck so good," Bella sighed, her chest heaving up and down.

"That must be why you love me so much," I said, bending down to pull up my pants and grab hers from the floor.

"Must be," she teased.

I helped her slip her pants back on and it hit me that I hadn't gotten to see her tits at all during that little escapade.

"Fuck, baby show me your boobs."

"What are you, fifteen?" she laughed, jumping down from the counter.

"I wanna see your tits."

"You see my tits all the time."

"Yeah, but I like to lick 'em and suck 'em." I started growing hard again and grabbed myself. Bella's eyes widened.

"Jesus Christ, Edward. Are you ever not hard?"

"You're like my own personal brand of Viagra," I groaned trying to pull her closer.

She pulled away, playfully fighting off my advances. I almost had her, when we heard the doorbell ring.

"Fuck!" I grumbled, realizing that our private playtime was officially over.

Bella slipped away from me and swung her hips dramatically as she walked to the door.

"You better knock that off," I warned. "I can't be responsible for what happens when you seduce me."

Bella giggled and turned the corner.

_Crazy woman. Crazy, beautiful, amazing woman._

I went to follow and appeared just as Bella's dad came into view.

"Your son has been properly fed and safely delivered into the arms of his doting grandmother," he joked when she opened the door. "I wasn't sure where you were at with this place so I went ahead and took him there."

"Thanks, dad. How was dinner?" Bella stepped aside and motioned for him to come in.

"It's how dinner usually is with Charlie. He couldn't sit still, he had to pee too many times, and he made a mess with his food."

I would have thought that he was agitated had it not been for the grin that was plastered on his face.

"You loved every minute of it, didn't you?" Bella laughed.

"Of course I did."

"Chief," I nodded and stuck out my hand.

He grabbed it firmly. "Edward."

"I've got some things I wanted to show you," I said, leading him into the living room. "We did an inventory and I took some pictures of the damage."

"Do you mind if I run over real quick and take Charlie a fresh pair of pajamas and a few other things?"

"No, baby, go ahead," I said kissing her head.

That was actually an excellent plan. I had needed to talk to the Chief about a few things without Bella hearing anyway.

"Daddy, make sure you say goodbye before you head out, please."

"I will," he responded, taking the beer that I was offering him.

We both watched as Bella grabbed a few things out of the laundry room and put on her coat and boots before leaving.

The apartment was silent for what seemed like an eternity. He was waiting for me to initiate discussion.

"Hey, Chief?" I called out, my nerves making a sudden appearance as he turned his head to look at me.

He raised his eyebrows in question and I took that as my cue to continue. "Can I. . . can I ask you a question?"

He nodded once.

"Um, can we sit?"

"Sure, son," he said approaching me and sitting down on the loveseat opposite me. "What's on your mind?"

_Shit, I probably should have thought this out in detail._

"Um, I was kind of wanting to discuss something with you."

His face showed no sign that he was anticipating what I was about to ask. He simply stared, waiting for me to continue.

"I've been thinking a lot about things lately," I started out, trying to sound sure of myself. "About medical school and where I might go."

More silence, more staring.

"I. . . well, Bella asked me to choose the school that I wanted to go to and. . . .if that happens to be on the East coast. . . . I'd like to have your permission to take Bella and Charlie with me."

The Chief snorted. "You are asking the wrong person, Edward."

"No, I know. I know I need to ask Bella, but I thought that if. . . if you supported the decision, that she would be happier to go. I won't go without her and Charlie, but I worry that she'll just agree with whatever I ask and she'll be unhappy leaving without your blessing.

I watched as his mouth twitched and he frowned.

"Edward, I'm going to tell you this because I think it's something you need to know."

I swallowed. Looking into the solemn face of Chief Swan felt like standing at the pearly gates, waiting to find out whether I would be saved or damned for all eternity.

"You have not been my favorite person for many, many years. In fact, you've pretty much been number one on my shit list."

I opened my mouth to speak, but he held up his hand to stop me.

"I didn't like you before I found out that you were Charlie's father. You were an arrogant, promiscuous, smart mouthed little prick who thought you could get away with anything because of your popularity and wealth. You pushed the boundaries and you plucked my nerves. And to find out that you were the one to take my daughter's innocence and that you never looked back. . . I wanted to hunt you down and break every bone in your body."

I felt my stomach turn. This conversation was not going the way that I had hoped.

The Chief took a huge swig of his beer and sighed.

"I understand that we all make mistakes, son. Hell, I've made my fair share. I wasn't much older than you were when Renee told me she was pregnant. I was scared shitless. I thought my life was over. Obviously it wasn't." He glanced down and his hands as they fiddled with the label on his bottle.

"Bella is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I know better than most how important a father is in a child's life. When she refused to tell me who the father was, I just assumed it was some boy at school. She was so heartbroken and ashamed. She couldn't look me in the eye for months."

It was a little odd hearing about Bella's initial reaction from someone other than her. It hurt. It hurt all over again knowing that if I had just reached out to her, things would have been different.

"But I'm not an idiot," he continued. "When I did the math, I knew it was someone from here, I just didn't know who. I actually cornered Mike Newton. Almost had the little shit pissing himself until he admitted to me that Bella had never let him touch her and he didn't know of anyone who she had."

He ran his hand over his mustache. "I did everything I could to try and convince her that even if the father didn't want the baby, that she should at least give him the chance. And I did it again after I discovered that you were that father."

"You are a good father, Edward. You've surprised me at how quickly you've taken to your role. When Bella first told me how you reacted, I thought for sure that you would abandon her, abandon them. That is why I gave you such a hard time. I had no faith in you."

I was concentrating hard on what he was saying, trying to read into his words, find something behind them to give me a clue.

"But you have proven me wrong. I am not too proud to admit that," he said finally looking up at me. "My daughter is happier now than she has ever been. I see that sparkle back in her eye that I've missed for so long. And I have you to thank for that."

"So, in other words, I will support whatever decision that you and Bella make together. But if you fuck it up, son, you need to either run really fast, or expect for me to show up on your doorstep with my shotgun and be prepared to take your punishment."

I opened my mouth and closed it again several times. I was pretty sure that I looked like a fish who was gasping for air, but I couldn't figure out how to put all the words in my head into sentences. Finally, I managed something intelligible.

"Chief," I started, his name coming out a little choked. "I. . .Love. . . your daughter. I have always loved your daughter. But as a kid I never knew how to tell her. I guess hindsight is always twenty-twenty. There's all sorts of things I should have, could have, done differently, but I didn't." I ran my hand through my hair, probably making it stand on end. "I want to protect her. I want to protect them, from anything and everything that could ever hurt them. I swear to you that I will do just that, always."

I dropped my hands to my lap, fiddling with them and trying to build up the courage for what I was going to say. It wasn't a question, but I wanted him to know where I stood.

"I want to marry Bella, Chief," I practically whispered. "I don't know when. We still have so much to work out and through. But I do know that she is it for me. I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with her."

He hummed. His eyes pierced through me and I shifted awkwardly. He didn't give me a verbal answer, but again, I never asked him a question. Instead, he slapped his hand against my back and stood. He chugged down the rest of his beer.

"So, did you manage to clean this place up?"

"Yes, sir. I wanted to show you something though."

I lead Charlie back to our bedroom and lifted the jacket that I had set on top of the dresser.

He let out a puff of air as he stared at the violent words.

"Wow. What exactly did you do to cause this kind of anger?"

"I have no idea," I admitted. "Your guys didn't see this?"

"My guess is that they did. I'm not an active part of the investigation so I don't know everything. Something about conflict of interest," he grumbled.

"Oh, well, I've taken some pictures anyway. I'll transfer them onto a flash drive and drop them off for you tomorrow. Bella has a list of things that she thinks are missing. I think she wants to put it into Excel so I'll just put that onto the drive as well."

I grabbed a few things that Bella and I might need before bed and her dad and I headed over to the main house for him to say goodbye and for me to settle in for the night.

XXXXXX

About half an hour later, Bella, Charlie and I were all in our pajamas. I sat down on the sofa in the basement and Charlie climbed up into my lap.

"Hi, Daddy."

"Hi, buddy," I said, kissing the top of his head.

Bella sat down next to us and curled her legs up underneath her.

"Everything okay?" she asked as she snuggled into my arm.

I thought about it for a moment and felt my lips turn up almost unconsciously. "Yeah, baby. Everything is fantastic."

**XXXXXX**

**AN: See, no cliffie this week. Aren't you proud of me?**

**So...Cammy is gone. Yes, this has been the plan for quite some time. For everything there is a reason. **

**Are we done? Uh...no. I have a lot of people asking how many more chapters and although I do not have a concrete number for you, I will guesstimate at about 5-8 more.**

**So hit that little button and tell me what you think. Is it all over? Have we dealt with the black aura? Can they now live happily ever after? (tapping chin) Is there something I've forgotten? ;o) lol. **

**NEXT WEEK: We actually will be jumping to our little family's first holiday together. Thanksgiving at Mrs. Jane's house. **


	28. Family First

**AN: Okay, I know this is not really late, b/c it's still Thursday(at least it is where I am), but I still feel like it's late. I apologize. I was lacking in motivation and energy this week. **

**Thank you for all of your wonderful reviews and messages. I read them all and appreciate every single one. You guys really make this worth doing. And your support means the world to me as I learn how to take a story from start to finish. **

**Mel, you have dealt with my last minute pic tease requests and chapter submissions so well. I can never thank you enough. **

**Mollie, I'm running out of ways to say what you mean to me. LOL. You'd think I'd be better with words, but after these huge ass chapters, my mind starts to turn to mush. **

**The usual disclaimer applies. Hope you like. **

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 26: Family First

The days following the fire and Cammy's death were kind of surreal. We stayed in the main house until a new bed could be delivered and the rugs could be cleaned to pick up any residual shards of glass. Edward had insisted we get a new dresser as well. At first I didn't understand why, but then he showed me. The words etched into the top of the solid wood must have taken time and a lot of anger. I still didn't understand why Cammy was so upset with us. Shouldn't it have been the other way around? She was the one fucking with us. I could only assume that it had more to do with her insistence that I was sleeping with Luke than anything to do with Edward and I. Regardless, it didn't matter anymore. At least, I didn't think it did.

I couldn't get past the feeling that I was being watched and maybe even followed. I had spotted the guy from the coffee shop who had winked at me around Forks twice. He didn't look at me, he didn't even acknowledge my existence, but I was pretty sure it was him. The first time was at the diner. He came in while Charlie and I were having a breakfast date with Jake and Claire. He sat at the counter and had a cup of coffee and a pastry. I tried to focus on the fact that Jake was attempting to get my son to try hot sauce on his eggs, but it was harder than I anticipated.

The second at the Thriftway on Friday night. I had left Charlie with Edward so I could get a full grocery trip in without any "help". Every time I looked up he was at the end of my isle. He had a basket full of things so it's not like I could say he wasn't shopping, but it just felt weird.

I hadn't mentioned it to Edward yet. I didn't want him to think I was completely paranoid and insane. If I kept seeing him or if he tried to talk to me, I would definitely tell him. I briefly wondered if Edward was being trailed as well. Of course, if that was something he noticed, chances were that he wouldn't just leave it; he'd confront whoever it was and I'd inevitably hear about it.

About four days after the fire, we got more information. Although my dad had excused himself from the case, he was still able to get information from his buddy who was one of the investigators.

When the autopsy came in, he called me. "Are you sure you want to hear this, Bells?" he asked hesitantly.

I was lying on my back on the sofa. Charlie was taking a nap and Edward was in the kitchen, but came out and sat down with a magazine, leaning his back against the cushions.

"No," I shrugged, even though he couldn't see me. "Just tell me though, please?"

"She suffered blunt force trauma to the head. They believe that she was unconscious, but alive at the time the fire was started. Her lungs. . ."

"I get it, dad," I grimaced, not needing to know the exact details of what was seemingly a gruesome death. "So, she was murdered?"

I wasn't sure how to feel about that. It didn't surprise me at all. There had to be some pissed off men in her life. If she stalked them like she was stalking Edward, someone was bound to get pushed too far.

I sat there trying to figure out what their findings meant for Edward and I. We had been questioned, which obviously meant that they knew we were tied to her. Were we really in the clear just because we weren't in town? There's more than one way to commit a murder and it doesn't always require using your own hands. Is that why we were being followed? Were we being watched by the police? Shit, I was beginning to think this whole ordeal wasn't entirely over.

"They're ruling it a homicide, yes," my dad confirmed.

"Do they have any suspects?" I really didn't know why I was asking. Maybe I was just curious. Maybe I just needed to know the facts so that I could put my mind at ease. I was still feeling a little uncomfortable in the apartment and I had the distinct feeling that things weren't entirely wrapped up concerning the break-in.

"They're still investigating. They have a list. I'm not sure where they are on it though."

"Do they know how it was started?"

"There wasn't any accelerant found. It appears that someone tried to make it look like an accident. There was candle wax found near the bed and the window. That's where the fire originated."

"Oh God, Dad, that's horrible," I choked. As psychotic as the woman was, did she really deserve to die that way?

"Alright, Bells, I need to get back to work."

"Okay, I love, Dad."

"Love you too, kid."

Edward looked up at me from his spot on the floor. He was reading some sort of medical journal. I looked at the title of the study over his shoulder.

**Depression, Stigma, and Suicidal Ideation in Medical Students**

"What is that?" I asked.

"It's Carlisle's copy of The Journal of the American Medical Association from a couple of months ago."

"That's a bit morbid, isn't it?" I asked, wrinkling my nose and nodding at the article.

"The whole thing is about medical students and residents. He thought it would be good for me to read."

He flipped back and I saw another article talking about Burnout and Professional Conduct. Shit, is that what we had to look forward to?

I sighed heavily and stared at the ceiling. There were all sorts of things I should have been doing, but I just couldn't find the motivation. I noticed Edward's cell phone on the coffee table.

"Gimme your phone," I said throwing my hand out and nearly smacking him in the head.

"What?"

"May I have your phone, please?" I tried again. "I'm bored."

"Where's yours?"

I lifted just my head and looked across the room. "I don't know, but I'm too lazy to go look."

Edward shook his head and chuckled before picking up his phone and handing it to me.

"Can I snoop?" I asked, knowing that he wouldn't care, but figuring I should ask anyway.

"Uh huh," he answered mindlessly, flipping the pages of his journal.

I poked around, looking at his applications, his calendar, his notes, his contacts.

"You do realize that I'm looking at everything, right?" I asked, my fingers fumbling around on the screen.

"I got no secrets from you, baby," he said, the corner of his mouth lifting into that sexy smirk of his.

"We'll see," I challenged playfully. I hit his text messages folder and opened it up. Most of them were from me, but there were also a whole bunch from Alice and Emmett, a few from Brian, Jasper, his parents and. . . .

"Edward?" I said sitting up.

"Hmmm?"

"Who is this from?"

I held the phone out for him to see. He tilted his head, but his eyes didn't leave the journal.

"Edward?"

"What, baby?"

"The phone?"

He finally looked over. His eyes narrowed as he stared at the screen. "Uh. . . I don't know."

"You don't know," I repeated, not asking a question. "Do you know what it means?"

"Someone was looking for me?" he shrugged. "I don't know, Bella. I didn't really pay much attention to it." He looked back down and flipped a page.

"Edward, this is from the night of the break-in."

"What?"

Seriously? The man was not paying attention to me at all.

"The night of the break-in. . . to the apartment."

He was quiet for a minute before turning back to look at me. "You think it's related?"

I rolled my eyes. "What else would it mean? Was someone looking for you in Boston?"

He grabbed the phone from me and studied it. "No, it was sent at midnight East coast time. I was either completely passed out in a drunken stupor or well on my way. No one would have been looking for me other than you."

I frowned at him. He thought he was being funny. "Well I didn't send it."

"Well then who the fuck did?" he asked, finally understanding what I was getting at.

I threw my head backwards. "That's what I've been asking, dumbass!"

"Shit, should we show your dad?"

"I don't know. I mean, if it was Cammy, she's dead, right?"

"Maybe we can see if he can trace it?"

"Oh God, Edward," I gasped as a sudden thought hit me. "Maybe that's why they've been following me. If they're tracing Cammy's phone calls and texts to you. Maybe they think I got jealous and killed her."

Edward snorted. "Yeah, that's totally something you'd do." And then it was like what I'd said finally sank in. He flipped around so that he was on his knees facing me. "What the fuck do you mean that's why they've been following you? Who's following you?"

_Whoops!_

"I. . . I don't know. I think there's a cop trailing me."

"A cop?"

"Yeah, um. . . I think. I don't know. I've seen a guy around."

"Bella, there are less than twenty-five thousand people between here and Port Angeles. Isn't it possible that it's a coincidence?"

"Well, yeah, that's what I was thinking at first, but it just seems weird."

"Besides, your dad would tell us if you were under surveillance."

"Not if he didn't know."

"Okay, now you're just being fucking ridiculous. Enough with the conspiracy theories, baby. We have enough drama in our life without creating any more."

He chuckled and flopped down next to me, pulling me to him and kissing my head. "Nobody's following you. Nobody is after us.

I took a deep breath. Edward was right. I was being ridiculous.

I leaned against his chest, relishing in the sound of his heartbeat and the feel of his hands running through my hair. The apartment was almost completely silent for a few minutes save for our breathing.

"What do you want to do, Bella?" He asked softly. Of course, my stupid ass thought he was talking about right then.

"I don't know," I sighed. "We can't do anything until Charlie wakes up. Unless you want to get someone to babysit."

"That's not what I meant."

I furrowed my brow and sat up straight.

"What do you want to do with your life? School? Work?. . . . Me?"

I felt my mouth turn up a little and I pulled my lip in between my teeth.

"Well. . . . Um, well, I'd like to go to grad school; get my Masters, maybe my PhD in Child Psychology."

This was the first time we'd actually talked about my plans. So much focus had been placed on Edward and his medical school career that I had taken a step back. I hadn't actually thought about it in months.

"Would you do research?"

I shook my head. "No. I don't think so. I think I might like to do therapy. Become a pediatric behavioral specialist. It's not that I don't like what I'm doing with Luke, I just don't think I could do it forever."

To be honest I was getting tired of sitting in the office staring at my computer all day. I knew that there was also research that could be done out in the field, but I just couldn't even imagine myself doing it.

Edward nodded. His knee started bouncing and I knew he was nervous about something. I watched him, waiting for what I knew he wanted to say.

"Doyouwantmorekids," he blurted out so quickly it took my brain a second to catch up.

I thought that we had had that conversation, but then I realized that, no, we hadn't. I thought about it the day that Charlie nearly nailed him in the nuts, but nothing was said out loud.

"Yes, I do," I admitted. "Not right now, but someday." I thought about the experience of being pregnant again, the morning sickness, the cramping, the ever expanding waistline. As miserable as it sounded on paper, I actually enjoyed the physical aspect of being pregnant. Just the fact that my body was capable of creating another human being was mind blowing. And, the idea of Charlie being a big brother? Now that was a thought. How could I ever love another person the way that I loved my son? I'm not sure that I had that much in me.

"Someday," Edward repeated quietly. "With me?"

I tilted my head, not quite sure what he was asking. "I don't understand," I said,

"Um, do you wanna have another baby with me?" Edward's body was tense, his face unsure.

Was he really questioning that? It may not have been ideal, but he had already given me the most precious thing in my life, why wouldn't I want him to give me another one eventually? Assuming that we survived the medical school experience, I wanted nothing more.

I shifted so that I could look him straight in the eyes. He looked so much like Charlie; so young and innocent. I put my hands on either side of his face and brought my lips to his. "Who else would I be having a baby with?"

"No one," he growled, resting his hand on my stomach. "I want to be the only one to put a baby in there."

I started laughing, but a sudden rush of emotions hit me and I let out a hiccuping sob.

"Aww, Bella, I'm sorry," Edward groaned, kissing away the tears that had begun to fall out of nowhere. "I didn't mean it. I. . . well, I did mean it, but . . . aww fuck!"

"I'm okay," I continued to laugh-cry. "I'm, it's just hormones and stress."

"Hmmm, want to take a shower?"

I shook my head and wiped my nose with my sleeve in a move that I had repeatedly told Charlie to stop doing. "No, perv. And sex doesn't solve everything."

"No, not everything, but hormones and stress, it definitely solves those things," Edward joked, kissing my nose. The move was tender, not seductive. He knew I wasn't going to say yes, at least not this time.

XXXXXXX

Sunday found me sitting in a little bridal boutique with Esme and Rose. We were watching Alice try on dresses and 'ooohhhing' and 'awwwwing' at the appropriate times.

"When is the actual date, Alice?" I asked when she came out in a mermaid style dress with ruffles along her hip. I wrinkled my nose.

"No?" she asked turning to face me. My eyes shot to Rose who was flat out grimacing and Esme who was shaking her head furiously.

"Please, please, please, tell me I'm not going to be eight months pregnant," Rose begged. "I cannot wear high heels with swollen hobbit feet and I have to wear high heels with a bridesmaid's dress."

"No, honey," Alice soothed. "I wouldn't do that to you. I could just see you going into labor during the reception. Spending my wedding night in the waiting room of the maternity wing is not my idea of romantic," she giggled. "We're thinking fall, just as the leaves are beginning to change."

"Oh, darling, that will be so beautiful," Esme said warmly.

"Not in that dress though," Rose snorted.

Alice agreed and went back to change into another dress.

"So what's going on with you and Edward?" Rose asked, pulling a nail file from her purse.

"What do you mean? We're fine."

"I mean have you guys talked about getting married?"

I saw Esme's head tilt a little out of the corner of my eye. She was trying very hard not to show how much she really wanted to know the answer to that question.

"Ha, no," I scoffed. "We haven't even been together for three months, Rose. You and Emmett were together for how many _years _before that actually happened? Jasper and Alice too."

"Yeah, but we were just kids when we got together. Besides, Alice and Jasper have really only been back together for two years."

"What do you mean 'back together'? They've been together forever."

Rose shook her blond locks. "They broke up about three months after moving East. Jazz didn't stay in Boston, he went to New York for school."

"That was not a good time for Alice," Esme chimed. "As much as she said it was important for her to, oh, what did she call it? Ah yes, '_explore her independence as a woman not attached to a man_.' She had a hard time with it."

This was news to me.

"How did I not know this?" I asked, completely taken off guard.

Rose shrugged. "Alice doesn't like to talk about it. I think she figures if she doesn't, it never happened. Crock of shit if you ask me, she was a pain in the ass for the entire time."

I couldn't imagine Alice without Jasper or vice versa. It just seemed. . . wrong.

"They decided to date other people. Ugh, do you remember that guy Carl she brought home for Easter that first year?" Rose asked, looking over at Esme.

Esme nodded. "I was so afraid she would actually fall for him. He was so smooth, but he actually had the gall to rest his hand on my hip while I was standing next to him. I almost had to hold Carlisle back from punching him in the nose. Oh, he was horrible."

Rose laughed. "Yeah, well, they broke up because he grabbed my ass a few weeks later when they came to visit. Emmett 'encouraged' him to go away."

"Oh, well that explains a lot," Esme laughed lightly.

"In any case," Rose continued. "I mean, you guys may not have been together very long, but you've already been through more than most couples. The betrayal, the separation, the hatred, the love. You have a child together and you live together. What exactly is holding you back at this point?"

I sighed and took a deep breath. "It's not that I wouldn't want to, but. . . . "

Esme's hand reached over and grabbed mine. Comforting my rising anxiety.

"It's just that, you say we've been through everything, but we haven't. He's reading these articles about medical school and how it can cause depression and anxiety. It can tear families apart. We don't know that we're going to survive that. I don't want to put Charlie through that; to give him the hope that his parents are going to live happily ever after."

"Have you talked to Edward about any of your worries?" Esme asked kindly.

I shook my head slightly. "We've talked about some things, but he has enough on his plate right now."

I was a little surprised at how easy it was to say this to Rose and Esme. As honest as I wanted to be with Edward, I didn't want him to change his medical school plans due to my anxiety about what may happen.

"He already thinks that, Bella. In another year, he's not going to remember a time when Edward wasn't there. You can't put your life on hold because of what might happen. I'm not saying rush into it. I'm just saying that you guys are strong. You're strong as individuals, you're strong as a couple, and you're strong as a family. Whenever you guys are ready, I say go for it."

"Go for what?" Alice asked stepping onto the bridal platform in a huge poofy princess gown.

"Nothing," I mumbled. "Oh, that one's pretty."

I needed to change the subject. It seemed like there had been too many conversations about the future lately. I knew it needed to be talked about, but it freaked me out a little too much.

Three hours and about thirty dresses later, I was in desperate need of a coffee. Rose looked like she was going to rip somebody's head off and Esme was practically falling asleep next to me. That all changed when Alice stepped out of the dressing room.

"Oh," I gasped.

Esme's hand covered her mouth and her eyes got all teary.

"That's the one," Rose said almost under her breath.

The dress was a Satin A-line with beading on the bust and trailing down the side. The waist was a faux wrap and the sleeves were capped lace. The train was minimal, but it was absolutely perfect. Alice looked stunning.

"Don't cry, mom," Alice whimpered, staring at her reflection in the mirror and seeing Esme almost lose it.

Esme grabbed a tissue from the coffee table in front of us. "You look so beautiful, sweetheart."

"This is definitely my dress," Alice grinned.

"Would you like to try on some veils?" The attendant asked.

"I don't think I want a veil," Alice said, shaking her head. "I'd like a tiara though."

I laughed. Of course she did.

XXXXXXXXX

The rest of the week was a complete whirlwind. Luke and I were in overdrive trying to pull everything together for the presentation and final report. We had three weeks left, but I was only working Monday the week of Thanksgiving and taking Wednesday and Friday off. I offered to come in on Tuesday as well, but Luke said not to worry about it.

I felt like I had to keep one eye on him at all times. He wasn't dealing with Cammy's death like I thought he would. He was pretending as if nothing had happened. It was easy enough for me, because I never saw her so it's not like I missed her at work, but Luke still saw her regularly. It was as if he were refusing to acknowledge that she was gone; or that she even ever really existed. He must have had stronger feelings for her than he let on.

And then there was my stalker. Now he was also the guy from the parking lot of the University satellite building and the playground across the street from Charlie's preschool while we were waiting for Edward to be done with work. He was definitely fucking following me. I just didn't understand why.

In any case, I'd had enough. While Charlie was playing with another little boy from his class I stormed over. He was sitting on a picnic table dressed in a black leather jacket and loose jeans. He wasn't looking at me at first, but was smoking a cigarette and staring up at the sky.

"Why the fuck are you following me?" I snarled when I got close enough that I knew he could hear me.

His eyes shifted towards me and he smirked. Taking a long drag of his cigarette, he didn't say anything at first, he simply stared at me. He blew the smoke up into the air and rested his elbows on his knees.

"What gives you the impression I'm following you?" he asked smoothly.

"There's no way that you're not. Port Angeles is small, but it's not that small. And Forks? I'm gonna call the fucking cops next time I see you."

"Hmmmm, okay," he shrugged.

I gaped at him. _Okay?_

"Who _are_ you?"

"You're yelling profanities at me and threatening to have me arrested for sitting on a picnic table enjoying a cigarette. I'm not about to tell you my name." He tilted his head, his eyes piercing mine.

I clenched my jaw in anger, grinding my teeth together violently.

"Stay the fuck away from me," I warned. "My father's a police chief. He'll put your ass in prison before you can say stalker."

He didn't look affected. He looked bored; and a little annoyed.

"You should keep a better eye on your kid," he said nodding towards the playground where Charlie was now talking to a teenage girl.

"Fuck you!" I snapped, turning on my heel and practically sprinting away. My heartbeat was thundering in my chest. There was something wrong with that guy.

By the time I got back to the playground, the girl was laughing.

"Sorry," she smiled. "He tried to kiss my little sister and she pushed him."

"Oh, God," I groaned. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. I just made her apologize. She can be a bit aggressive sometimes," she explained. "He's a cute little guy."

"Thank you." I was trying to be polite, but I was a little on edge.

"Is that his dad?" She pointed to the guy, who still hadn't moved from his spot on the table. He lifted his hand as if to say hello and smirked again. I shuttered.

"Absolutely not. I have no idea who that guy is. I was telling him he needed to leave if he didn't have a kid here."

"Ew," she wrinkled her nose. "Anyway. Lily, we need to go home," she called. I watched as the dark haired little girl shot Charlie a pouty scowl and darted towards her sister. My son just grinned after her.

"You too, Charlie, let's go get daddy."

I didn't want to talk to Edward about my stalker in front of Charlie. I knew he'd get upset and yell at me for confronting the strange guy, but I couldn't help myself. What else was I supposed to do, let him keep following me?

I sat in the car on the ride home and planned out what I was going to say.

"Are you fucking insane?" Edward growled after I had put Charlie down for the night?

"I had to say something."

"Yeah, you did, but not to him. Why didn't you call me?"

"And what would you have done?"

"I would have come over there and kicked the fucker's ass."

I sighed.

"If you see him again I want you to call me. I'm gonna talk to your dad. This is fucking bullshit."

"Okay," I acquiesced "Whatever we need to do."

XXXXXX

"Fucking hate this shit," I mumbled to myself as I lifted the lid on the toilet in the master bedroom.

_And I thought it was only little boys who couldn't aim._

I scrubbed the bowl and wiped down the surfaces with a Lysol wipe before picking up the trash to empty it.

"Ewph," I groaned.

_What the fuck?_

I peered into the can for a few minutes before carrying it out into the living room.

"Hey, Edward?"

"What's up?" he asked, as he wiped down the kitchen counter. We were attempting to clean the apartment since it hadn't had a good scrub down in a while.

"What the hell is this?" I asked tilting the can to show him.

He screwed up his face in disgust. "Ew, yeah, I found that in the drawer when I was cleaning up the bedroom."

_The drawer? What the fuck was it doing in the drawer?_

"When?"

"After the break-in?"

"As in last week?"

That made no fucking sense at all.

"Yeah?"

"Edward, we haven't used condoms in a month. Do you really think I would let a nasty used one sit in the drawer for that long?"

"It was _my_ drawer."

I stared at him with what I hoped was a '_are you fucking kidding me_' look.

"Um. . . I don't know what to tell you."

I looked back down at the condom. Fucking gross. "Give me a plastic baggy," I groaned.

"What the fuck for?"

"I'm a cop's daughter, Edward. If this isn't ours, who else's would it be? Last time I checked, a condom goes on a guy. Maybe Cammy had someone help her."

"And she fucked him in our room?" he asked in disbelief.

I grimaced. That was an extremely disturbing thought.

"Why would she do that?"

"Because she's a psycho," I spit before realizing what I'd said. "Because she _was_, a psycho. If she had help, maybe we can still catch him."

"What if it is ours? Are you really going to give it to your dad to test?"

"Oh my God, no!" I screeched. "I'll take it in to the station. Leland's supposed to be the lead on the case."

"We're going to be really fucking embarrassed if it's ours."

"Yeah, but at least we'll know."

XXXXXXXX

EPOV

Thanksgiving Day. Mrs. Jane had invited us to spend it at her house since she was '_lonely and missed having her family and friends around to spend the holidays with_.' She was a smart woman. She knew very well that not only could Bella and I not resist that, but neither could my parents. We were to be there at nine a.m.

I lay awake, on my side, watching Bella's back rise and fall as she took heavy breaths. I loved watching her sleep, especially when she was topless, as she was just then. It was all in the curvature of her body. The length of her spine and the planes of her delicate muscles. I could almost tell you when her dreams were calm and when they were not by the tensing and relaxing of those muscles.

I lifted my finger and began tracing patterns across her shoulder blades. Her skin broke out in goose bumps almost immediately, but there were no signs that she had woken up. I made a trail down her vertebrae and when I reached where the sheet met her lower back, I pushed it away so that I could see the dimples just above her ass. They were practically begging for attention. So, leaning forward, I pressed my warm lips against her chilled skin. She let out a soft moan. I smiled against her skin and continued to pepper her with affection.

She shifted slightly and I knew she was awake. I lifted my head and saw that her beautiful face was now turned back towards me. I leaned away and tried to look apologetic.

"Hi," I grinned sheepishly.

"Hi," she whispered.

She shifted again, this time onto her side, exposing her perfect pink breasts to me. I watched as her nipples puckered and hardened from the sudden temperature change. I licked my lips, more out of habit than anything else. I returned to tracing patterns across her skin, this time up and down her arm and across her collarbone as we stared at each other in comfortable silence. When I cupped her chin and brushed my thumb across her cheekbone, her eyes closed and I scooted myself towards her so that my body was flush against hers.

With naked skin pressed to naked skin, of course I got hard. To be honest I was already hard. I was always hard in the morning, but I was always hard for my girl so I guess I would say that I got harder.

She giggled and nuzzled her head under my chin, trying to steal the warmth my body was radiating. I ran my hand up and down the back of her head, stroking her hair before burrowing it in further. I gripped it lightly and pulled her head back so that I could see her face.

My lips met her lips in a very lazy and languid kiss. The tips of our tongues toyed with each other, but never fully wrestled together. We just enjoyed being in each other's arms.

It wasn't until we began to hear the tell-tale signs of Charlie stirring that I sighed and let her go.

"You stay in bed, I'll get him," I said as I pulled on a pair of sweatpants and kissed her once again.

"Hmmmm, I'll get up too," she sighed, sitting up and stretching her arms above her head. I heard a noise and Bella's eyes widened in amusement.

"What was that?" I asked, somewhat alarmed.

"You tell me," she laughed.

"What are you talking about?"

"That came out of you."

_It did?_

"It did?"

"Yeah. It was like a chest growl, rumble thing. I have no idea how you did that."

Apparently I didn't either since I hadn't even realized I'd done it.

"Huh."

"What were you thinking about just then?" Bella asked. She must have had some idea because I could see the tips of her ears redden and her cheeks flush. I moved closer to her; close enough to run the back of my fingers across her cheeks, following the blush down her neck.

"I was thinking dirty, dirty things that will need to be addressed," I flicked my thumb over her nipple and watched as her back arched, forcing her further against my hand. I bent down and sucked it into my mouth and then let it go with a dramatic popping sound. "later."

"Edward," she whined as I stood up. I didn't look back at her as I left the room. Leaving Bella sexually frustrated for a little while, almost always ended up well for me. I tried not to do it too much, because I didn't want her to catch onto what I was doing, but it usually meant she'd attack me the first chance she got, regardless of where we were. The last time was right after her period finished last week. She was horny as all hell after still not letting me touch her for almost an entire week and I purposefully made sure we didn't get a chance to scratch her itch. It resulted in her taking a detour after dropping Charlie off at preschool. She parked in the back of an abandoned warehouse, near a wooded area and launched herself into my lap, unbuckling my belt and impaling herself onto me in record time. Fuck, it was hot. She came almost instantly and then again before I emptied myself into her. That ended up being a fantastic fucking day. She came back at lunch and we returned to the same spot to do it again.

I entered the kitchen trying to think of other things so that the tent that I was pitching would decrease in intensity before my son made his way out. Sure enough, by the time I heard his little feet padding down the hallway I was all calmed down.

"Hi, little man," I smiled.

Charlie looked at me for a minute with a confused expression, but before I could ask him what was the matter he walked over to me and reached up without a word. I picked him up and he laid his head on my shoulder. I loved it when he did this. He wasn't entirely awake yet and he was pretty much just slumped over on me. I could feel his tiny little breaths against my shoulder. He had Ruffy in his hands and I could feel the fur rubbing against my neck as I worked to get the coffee going before Bella came out.

"Can I put you down, buddy?" I asked, realizing it would be much easier if I had both hands. He shook his head against my shoulder. I could have just done it anyway, but it really wasn't hindering anything, just making it slower. It was Thanksgiving Day; I could afford to be a little slow. I had a hell of a lot more to be thankful for this year.

I managed to pry Charlie from around my neck and sat him down at the table with a sippy cup of orange juice while I cooked him up an Egg-in-the-Basket. He was dipping the bread into the yoke when Bella wandered out. She was dressed and her hair was wet and pulled up to the top of her head.

"Hmmmm, coffee," she purred, wrapping her arms around my waist and kissing my pierced nipple. My cock twitched; Bella laughed.

"Feeling better?" I teased, figuring, just like me, she'd had enough time to calm down. I took a swig of my coffee.

"Much," she sighed. "No thanks to you. I had to take care of myself."

I choked on the scalding hot liquid in my mouth. "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!" I ran over and shoved my mouth under the faucet, collecting as much cold water as I could to calm the burn. Probably not really the way that you're supposed to fix it, but momentarily, it felt better.

Once I no longer felt like my throat was being torn to shreds I glared at her. "You have got to be shittin me?"

She stuck her tongue out between her teeth and shook her head. "A girl's got to do what a girl's got to do," she grinned. "Next time...you should think about following through."

She pushed past me to grab herself a cup of coffee and an English muffin. I stood there gaping at the little vixen who had just managed to restore me to full mast.

"Better go take care of that," she said, palming me on her way into the dining room to sit down next to Charlie. She didn't get very far. I grabbed her wrist, holding her hand on me and rubbing it up and down before I let her go.

She snorted and walked away, shaking her head. I went to take a shower.

XXXXXX

About an hour and a half later, we were in the BMW heading south to Mrs. Jane's house. My parents were behind us with Alice and Jasper. Emmett and Rose were behind them and all the way in the back I could just make out the lights on the top of Chief Swan's cruiser.

Mrs. Jane greeted us all and welcomed us in. Neither of my siblings or their significant others had been there before so they spent the first ten minutes in awe of everything around them. Mrs. Jane showed us into the den where she had a 42" flat screen television set hanging on the wall.

I opened my mouth, but no words came out.

"My son and his wife are coming for holiday for six weeks starting next month. I figured he was going to want me to have a telly anyway, I might as well get one early so you gentleman can watch your American Football," she said, answering my unasked question.

Charlie and Mrs. Jane took the chief, Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rose on a tour of the house while my parents, Bella and I pulled grocery bag after grocery bag out of the car. There were a few things that were pre-made, but my mom insisted that she wanted everything as fresh as it could be.

Mrs. Jane had set out a few brunch items. A quiche, some square sausage sandwiches (which were something that Henry apparently adored), orange juice, champagne, bagels with cream cheese, and few more things. There were also two carafes of coffee, a pot of tea and cream and sugar.

I sat down on the overstuffed sofa and pulled Bella into my lap, burying my nose in her hair, which was still pulled up at the back of her head. "You smell good," I whispered. Apparently it was loud enough for my mother to hear.

"You two better behave yourselves," Mom wagged her finger at us playfully.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I grinned innocently.

"Sure you don't," she scowled. But even with her lips pursed, my mom couldn't hide her delight that Bella and I were so comfortable with our public displays of affection. Fuck, if Bella would let me hump her leg in public I probably would, but I had my doubts that she'd actually be okay with that.

It wasn't long before the rest of the group joined us. We watched the tail end of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade so that Charlie could see Santa Claus. He jumped up and down and danced in a circle as some teenage pop star sang and gaped as the big man himself waved from his perch. After that, we put on the Lions vs. Patriots game which had already started. I was watching Charlie try to teach Mrs. Jane how to play rock, paper, scissors. It was actually quite amusing. I have a feeling she already knew what she was doing, but she listened to Charlie's instructions carefully anyway.

"Son, can you come in here please?" Carlisle called from the kitchen.

"Yeah, Dad, two seconds," I shouted back. I stood up groping Bella's ass before turning around and heading to see what Carlisle wanted. I didn't even wait around to see her reaction, but smiled to myself when I heard the slightest growl erupt from her throat.

"What's up, pops?" I asked.

I surveyed the kitchen and found Jasper, Emmett, and the chief all sitting around. Jasper looked unsure, Em looked excited, and the chief looked. . . . absolutely petrified.

"What's going on?"

"I've decided this year you boys should finally learn how to make a proper Thanksgiving dinner. It's time to dress the turkey."

"Huh?"

"Cook, son, cook the turkey."

"But. . . . why?"

"Because it's not nice to assume that your wife is going to do it for you," Carlisle said, giving me a pointed look. "Remember the year we didn't actually have a turkey, just side dishes?"

Emmett and I nodded. We had all come into the dining room after goofing around and watching football all morning. We sat down at the table only to find that there was no turkey.

"Well that's because I assumed your mother was taking care of everything. She decided to prove her point that she didn't actually enjoy spending all morning in the kitchen by herself by leaving the turkey to me."

"How is that fair?" Emmett asked. "How were you supposed to know? And we all suffered because of it. Imagine a Thanksgiving without a fucking turkey."

Carlisle ran his hand through his hair, looking a bit sheepish.

"Because I actually asked him to do the turkey, but he apparently wasn't listening to me," my mom interrupted as she breezed through the kitchen to fill the carafe she was holding with a fresh pot of coffee.

Jasper laughed. "Rookie mistake, Carlisle. How long had you guys been together."

I snorted, knowing the answer to that question.

"Six years," mom said flatly.

"Oh shit," Jasper laughed.

"So do you understand why it's important to learn how to do this?" Carlisle asked.

"Um, yes. I guess." No, I really didn't. Bella loved to cook. She'd probably kick me out of the kitchen if I even tried to help.

Carlisle must have read the look of doubt on my face. He leaned in, whispering. "A little advice, son. Take care of your woman and she'll take care of you."

"Dad!" I shouted. There was no subtle insinuation in that advice, he was flat out telling me that if I did this I was guaranteed to get laid.

"Esme and I thought it would be a good idea to trade holidays," he continued as if he hadn't just shocked the shit out of me. "The men cook for Thanksgiving and the women for Christmas."

"Awesome!" Emmett cheered.

"Wonderful," Jasper sighed.

"Uh..." Bella's dad looked almost green. "I can't cook," he mumbled.

"No better time to learn, Chief," I grinned and clapped him on the shoulder.

I don't think he was amused. For the next hour and a half he kept bumping into me, stepping on my toes and elbowing me 'on accident'. The smirk on his face and the twitching mustache gave him away though.

Eventually, as the rest of my family finished up with their dishes it was just me and the chief. I was mixing up some dough in the electric mixer and had just put the ingredients in when I turned around and was greeted by the whirring of the mixer on high and a face full of flour.

"Whoops."

I closed my eyes and coughed.

"Daddy!" I heard a sweet voice scold.

"It was an accident!" he defended.

I heard her hand connect as she smacked his shoulder. "Go," she said.

He chuckling as he left the room. At least I think that's what he was doing. I couldn't actually see since I still had my eyes shut.

I felt Bella's fingertips brush over my face, and over my eyes.

"You can open them now, baby," she whispered.

I cracked my eyes open, peeking through my eyelids to see my girl standing in front of me, her lip in between her teeth, but a big smile spread from ear to ear.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

"You look kinda sexy covered in flour," she giggled.

"Pfft. I look sexy all the time." I caged her against the island by placing my hands on either side of her.

"True."

I leaned in and rubbed her nose with mine. Our kiss started out slow, but very quickly became a mauling as I wrapped one hand in her hair and the other around the back of her neck.

We slowed down, remembering where we were and that there were any number of people that could walk in on us.

"Did you have fun making dinner?" Bella asked when I wrapped my arm around her waist.

"Oh, yeah, it was so much more fun than watching football and sneaking boob and ass gropes."

"I hope you're talking about my boobs and ass," Bella chuckled.

"Well, let's see. What are my other options?"

"Edward," she frowned.

"Hey, you brought it up. Excluding the guys, cause, um. . . just no! My mom and sister, uh another no, that's gross. Mrs. Jane, she's as close to a grandmother as anyone I've ever known, so. . . yeah, still gross. Rose?"

"She'd beat the shit out of you if you touched her," Bella snorted.

"I must be talking about your boobs and ass then."

I kissed Bella's soft lips again as we both snickered.

"Oh my Lord, you two!"

Mrs. Jane was standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips.

"We weren't doing anything," I cried.

"Don't give me that tripe. The poor girl was spotless before she came in here and now she's covered in flour."

I looked over at Bella. Mrs. Jane was right, she was filthy. I grinned and turned to grab a dish towel from the drawer. Wetting it down, I wiped the flour from her face and neck. While she used her hands to shake the flour dust out of her hair, I ran the cloth over her tits as slyly as I could, keeping my eyes trained on the ceiling above.

Bella scoffed and took the cloth from me, wiping it over my face and neck just as I had done for her. I thought that maybe she was going to try and cop a feel just to get me back, but she didn't.

"Go watch your footyball," Mrs. Jane said. "I'll do the last loaf."

"Are you sure? I can finish it up," I started to protest.

"No, dear, I'll be fine. I think your son is looking for a new arm wrestling competitor."

"Well at least let me clean up this mess," I offered.

Mrs. Jane shot me one of those mother or grandmother looks that pretty much told me to get the hell out of her kitchen. I obliged, but at the last minute I stuck my palm flat against the counter top. Time to get the chief back. I wrapped my arm around Bella's waist and grabbed her ass firmly, leaving a very clear hand print on the black pants she was wearing. She squeaked, but had no idea what I had just done.

When we entered the room Charlie was in a battle of strength with my brother.

"Daddy, I'm stronger dan Emmie!" Charlie shouted just as the back of Emmett's hand hit the table.

"Of course you are," I laughed. "What's the score?"

"Twenty-four, twenty-four," Jasper offered.

"Really? Nice. How much time left?

"Fourth quarter just started," Bella's dad mumbled, leaning forward in his chair.

I turned to face him and saw the death glare that he was giving me. I grinned.

"You think you're funny, son?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, sir," I chuckled, giving myself away.

"Oh, dear lord," Alice snorted.

"What?" Bella asked looking around. "What did he do?"

Alice stood up and grabbed Bella's shoulders. "Have you seen your butt lately?" she asked, her eyebrows raised.

Bella turned her head over her shoulder, eyeballing my handy work.

"You jerk!" she shouted, slapping my shoulder.

I jumped away, rubbing my shoulder and winking playfully at her as she brushed her ass off.

"Daddy, can you arm wessa wif me?"

"Oh, I don't know," I pretended to think. "You might hurt me."

"Pweeeeease? I won hurt you. I promise."

I looked around the room. Everyone was watching us in amusement.

"I suppose so."

I sat down on the floor opposite of my son and watched as his little arm readied itself.

_How the hell do I do this?_

I had to maneuver my arm in such a way that it was angled uncomfortably, but at least it was at his level.

"Ready?" Charlie asked.

"Ready."

"GO!"

For a few minutes I adjusted the force I was putting to either have me or to have Charlie winning. It took very little effort, but I sure did make it look like it did. I scrunched up my face, growled and grunted.

Charlie put his other hand on top of mine and stood up putting everything he had into bringing me down.

"Oh, ah. You're. Just. Too. Strong." I groaned, my arm slamming down onto the table.

"Yay!" Charlie yelled, jumping up and down. "Mommy, Mamma, I'm stronger dan daddy!"

"I know you are, baby." Bella giggled catching him as he jumped into her lap. Carlisle and Charlie both gave him a high five and Alice stole a kiss.

"Oh, I see how it is." I pretended to be upset as I shooed Alice over so I could sit next to my woman. Once I was seated, with my thigh firmly pressed against Bella's, Charlie reached over and put his hand on my shoulder.

"It's okay, daddy. Maybe you should drink more miwk."

Bella snorted.

"More milk?"

"Mommy says miwk makes you big and strong. You need more miwk," he shrugged.

The whole room broke out into laughter and snickers at my expense.

"Yeah, buddy, I suppose I do."

XXXXXXXXX

The whole house was filled with the amazing aroma of mouthwatering foods. Turkey, stuffing, green bean casserole, candied yams, mashed potatoes and gravy, freshly baked bread.

We sat down at the dinner table, which had two leafs in it to make it large enough for all of us Mrs. Jane sat at the one end. On one side sat Rose, Emmett, Jasper, Alice and Chief Swan. The other head was left empty, in memory of Henry. Then Carlisle, Mom, Charlie, Bella and me.

"So what are we thankful for?" Emmett asked.

I rolled my eyes. Were we really going to do this?

"Well I am thankful for all of you joining me," Mrs. Jane said. "Not being American, Henry and I didn't really celebrate Thanksgiving. We went to the homeless shelter and served dinner there. I continued doing that after his passing, but this year I felt like, as important as it is to do my mission work, it's also important to spend the holidays with family. So that is what I'm doing."

"I'm thankful for the ability to grow life. At least, right now I am," Rose snickered.

"I'm thankful I've got such powerful swimmers!" Emmett boomed.

"Oh, my God," I heard my mom groan.

"I'm thankful for my beautiful soon-to-be wife." Jasper kissed Alice's head.

"And me for my soon-to-be husband," Alice smiled. "And for finding my best friend again, and for my nephew." I saw Bella smile, but when she bowed her head, it faltered.

"Oh, me too," Emmett interrupted.

"Uh, I. . . I'm thankful for my daughter and grandson. I'm thankful that they are happy and loved."

Chief Swan cleared his throat and indicated that he was done.

"Well I'm thankful all our family is safe and healthy. . . and growing," Carlisle chuckled. "I'm thankful that I've gotten to experience being a grandfather for the first time and can't wait to do it again."

I looked at Bella. Her face was paling. I put my hand on the back of her neck and she glanced at me, giving me a weak smile.

My mom looked over the table with a huge grin on her face. "I am so very thankful that we are able to celebrate this year with everyone. I am thankful for Bella and of course, our sweet little boy, who has brought so much joy and laughter to our lives. I am thankful that my children are all finally happy and growing up and becoming parents themselves. It is an amazing thing to be a part of."

"Do you want to say what you're thankful for," Mom asked Charlie.

He shook his head. "I'm hungry."

Everyone chuckled, except for Bella, who now looked like she was going to be sick.

"Are you okay?" I whispered.

"Uh huh," she said unconvincingly. "Can you go first?"

"Um, okay. I'm thankful for this gorgeous, amazing, wonderful, feisty woman next to me who puts up with my silly ass and loves me despite all of my. . . less attractive qualities. And of course for the little spit-fire miniature me over there." I reached around Bella and tugged at Charlie's unruly hair. "I'm thankful that our family is helping us through this journey and haven't killed us yet. And I'm thankful for our future."

I had a whole bunch more that I wanted to say, but it needed to be said to my girl alone. I grasped Bella's hand under the table and squeezed it. She was trembling.

"Oh, uh, my turn," she stuttered. "I'm thankful that Mrs. Jane has so graciously welcomed us into her home today."

"Here, here," Carlisle said lifting his glass, but not drinking from it.

"I...I..I'm thankful that you all have been so wonderful to Charlie and me. That you've taken us in and surrounded us with love and friendship."

I looked around. Smiles were softening as everyone noticed Bella's emotion. But no one said anything.

"I'm thankful that I have found the love of my life where I never expected it and that he has been such an incredible father and partner."

She bit her lip. "I'm thankful for a whole bunch more, but I think if I keep going, my child is going to start gnawing on the table," Bella chuckled lightly. She was deflecting, but it worked. For almost everyone. Of course I noticed, and so did my mom. She was staring at Bella with a sad look on her face, but she masked it quickly as glasses were raised.

We ate and talked and ate some more. After dinner the women did the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen so that we could watch the end of the second game; the Cowboys versus the Saints. At about five we headed home. Not necessarily the smartest thing to do as Charlie fell asleep about ten minutes in. That meant he was going to be up very early.

"Hey, baby," I rubbed my thumb over Bella's knuckles as she sat in the passenger's seat of my car.

"Hmmmm?"

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing, why?"

"At dinner. . . "

"Oh," she sighed. "It's nothing. I just got hit with a giant dose of regret."

I didn't need to ask her what she regretted. I got hit with the same thing, frequently. I wondered if there would ever be a time when we didn't chastise ourselves for our immaturity and mistakes.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Bella. We promised to be honest about this shit. How do we ever move past it if we can't even talk about it with each other?"

"There's nothing to talk about. I will always regret not telling you when I found out I was pregnant. I will always feel guilty for stealing the first three years of Charlie's life from you and your family. There is nothing that we can say or do that will change it and it makes me sick. It makes me angry and hurt."

I was almost at a loss for words. Almost.

"How do I make you understand?" I sighed. "Everything that we have been through, Bella has brought us closer. Of course I would have wanted to know back then, but we were kids. There are so many 'what ifs' and 'should haves'.

I pulled into the driveway in front of the apartment and turned to face her, cupping her cheek in my hand.

"I am thankful that we didn't tear each other apart in the beginning even though we both wanted to. I am thankful for every word you said to me to force me into understanding what I left behind. You have given me the most precious, the most amazing gift and I am thankful that it is you who is the mother of my child."

I could feel the emotion in my throat and I swallowed thickly. Bella had tears slipping from the corners of her eyes and I leaned forward, kissing them away. I rested my lips against her forehead lightly and whispered against her skin.

"We've been through too much already to live with all that regret. I know that it will never completely go away. Trust me when I say that I really fucking know. But we need to try and leave it behind as much as we can. It's too hard to plan a future if we can't let go of the past."

Bella hiccoughed and I felt her fingers wrap around the side of my neck.

"I know. And I'm trying. I'm just scared."

"What are you scared about?" I asked, pulling her over the console and into my lap.

She settled down so that she was straddling me, her chest pressed against mine.

"That it's going to get harder. That we're not going to make it," she whispered as if by saying it out loud, it would come true.

I rested my hand on her hips before sliding them around the small of her back.

"We'll make it, Bella. I love you. You love me. We have Charlie, yes, but he is only part of our bond. Our bond is here," I said placing my hand on her heart. There's nothing that can tear us apart. Not anymore."

"What if love isn't enough. It wasn't for my parents."

"We are not your parents, Bella. They obviously were not meant to be together. We are."

She didn't say anything else. Instead she buried her face into my shoulder. I wanted to give her comfort and assurance. I wanted to give her anything she needed to know that I would do anything to hold onto her forever. I knew that only time could prove what I was saying to her as truth, but I hoped that deep down inside she understood the depth of my love for her.

XXXXXXX

BPOV

I had absolutely refused to go shopping on Black Friday. So had Rose.

"This baby is making me tired all of the time," she had grumbled. "There is no way I'm waking up at the ass crack of dawn to get a few bucks off of a DVD."

So we were leaving that to Alice and Esme. It was a good thing too, because when I woke up at five a.m. to Charlie climbing into bed with us, I was a little grumpy. I turned on the television to let him watch Little Bear while I buried my head into his father's pillow, thereby waking him up in the process.

Edward had bought the television after the break-in. He said it was so that we could watch movies and not have to worry about falling asleep on the sofa. I think it had more to do with the porn collection I found in box in the storage room when I was looking for some old clothes. Horny bastard.

I managed to stay away from the shops for a couple of days, fearing the masses of people who were now officially in the holiday shopping mood. However, on Sunday, I finally gave in and Edward, Charlie, and I made our way to the Port Angeles mall. The clothes I had been wearing for the last couple of weeks were pre-Charlie clothes and although they still fit for the most part, I was a little curvier in places and they were tighter than I would have liked. Pants are not supposed to leave a seam indent in your skin, at least not one that doesn't go away.

"You want a coffee?" Edward asked as I entered Express.

"Yes, please," I answered, kissing him softly and practically pushing him towards the Starbucks.

I wandered around for about five minutes, picking up things here and there. I was able to grab a handful of clothes that I didn't have to try on, because they were the exact same things I had owned before. Classic things like jeans and a couple of plain t-shirts. I also grabbed a few pairs of dress pants and a button up or two.

I was looking at the clearance rack when I heard an all too familiar voice cackling not too far away.

"Oh, my God, you are so lucky. Do you really think he'll be jealous?"

"Of course he will," another voice purred. "He's always had a temper. He won't be able to stand seeing me with another man."

_Fuck! What the hell is she doing here?_

I tried not to move. My back was partially to the two women and I hoped to God that they didn't notice me.

It's not that I was afraid, it's just I didn't want to get into it with either one of them while Charlie was with me. And I just needed to escape without being seen before Edward came back. He had made it perfectly clear how he felt about Tanya on more than one occasion. The problem was that they were in between me and the door.

"Oh, look Jess, it's Isabella. You know, that shy girl we went to school with." I heard her voice titter.

Fuck, I'd been spotted. Not only that, she was trying to get to me. She knew I could hear her.

"Poor thing hasn't changed much, has she? Still pretty homely."

"What are you doing?" I heard Jessica hiss.

Tanya said something to Jess that I didn't hear before talking out loud again.

"Maybe we should go say hi."

"Whatever!" Jessica snarled. "I'm not saying anything to that little bitch. I don't care what you do, but you're doing it on your own."

Jessica stormed out the door.

_One down, one to go._

Charlie was standing a few feet away from me playing with the jewelry.

"Oh, my goodness, Isabella?"

I closed my eyes and clenched my teeth.

"Tanya. I haven't seen you around for a while."

_Why the fuck am I even attempting to be civil?_

"Oh, yeah, well, I'm back visiting my parents for Thanksgiving. They moved to this huge house outside of PA after I graduated. You know, I went East with Edward, but I was just so unhappy over there. I finished up school in Tacoma. I just don't get back here as often as I'd like. Are you still in Forks? God, I'd probably kill myself if I had to stay there."

I didn't say anything. I didn't even try to play nice. The bitch was trying to provoke me and it was working. I should have walked away then, while she was in mid-babble, but I didn't. I glanced over at Charlie again to find him eyeballing the lip gloss stand.

Tanya followed my gaze. I turned back to see a flash of a sneer on her face, but very quickly replaced it with an amazingly fake grin.

"Awww, how sweet. Are you a nanny?" she cooed, taking in Charlie.

He looked up at her and she faked a gasp. "Oh, Bella, I didn't even realize. You must be Edward's nanny. I'd heard through some of our friends in Boston that he had had a baby with a dreadful girl; one of his mistakes," she sneered.

"She's trying to trap him or something like that. I guess he said she's a horrible, nasty little bitch, but he's been trying to play nice so that he can take her to court and get full custody. You know, make her think he loves her; lull her into a false sense of security. She actually thinks she's good enough for him." Tanya let out a cackle, staring at me as if she could see right through me. "As if! One night stands mean nothing to him. They never have."

She knew exactly what she was doing. She knew that I wouldn't be able to respond without completely exposing Charlie to something I wouldn't want him to see. And I knew she had to be lying. Edward wouldn't ever say those things. They simply weren't true. Did she really believe that I was buying her ignorance regarding Charlie's parentage?

"It's so wonderful that he was able to hire you to take care of the little guy. Working for the Cullen's must be nice. They've always been my family, you know? I didn't want to end things with Edward, but I don't do the whole long distance relationship thing. I don't know though, now that he's back, I'm sure he'd be totally up for getting back together. I've always felt that we were soul mates."

She leaned in as if she were about to tell me a secret. I backed away a little, but not enough.

"And he never could resist me. We were always so passionate and intense." She giggled and winked at me, but it was all a show.

The way she looked at me when she said this told me more than any of her words ever could. There was pure, unadulterated hatred in those eyes. The smiles and friendly gestures were warnings in disguise. She was challenging me.

I was too stunned to react. The rage that I was feeling was indescribable. Every inch of my body felt like it was on fire. My fists were balled tightly and I was pretty sure that my fingernails were going to draw blood from my palms. If my son wasn't standing next to me, I would have ripped every single blond hair out of her head and shoved them down her throat. Who the fuck did she think she was fooling?

I needed to get out. . . . immediately.

I saw Edward coming into the shop. He froze when he saw who I was talking to. Even from twenty feet away I could see the darkness completely consume him. I started to panic.

We made eye contact and I shook my head a little, hoping that he understood that I didn't want him to cause a scene. I saw a wicked smirk cross his face and closed my eyes.

_Fuck, what's he gonna do?_

I set the clothes I was holding down so that I could intercept if I needed to. His steps were purposeful and I tried not to look at him as he approached us. I could see the exact moment that Tanya noticed him as he brushed past her. Several emotions played across her face. Surprise, excitement, fear, lust and anger. They were all there.

Edward set his coffee and a paper bag down on the display table next to me and slipped his free hand around my waist, offering me mine. I reached for it and he pulled it back, teasingly.

"Ah ah," he said, licking his lips to let me know what he wanted. He was completely ignoring her. My gaze flickered to her. She was standing awkwardly with her hands on her hips, glaring.

I smiled and bit my lip as his mouth descended on mine.

_Holy shit!_

He certainly didn't hold back. When I opened my mouth to take in a slight bit of air he plunged his tongue in. I almost dropped my drink. We were definitely putting on a show. Luckily there weren't that many people in the store, but out of the corner of my eye I could see a couple of women watching us with mouths open. Yeah, it was a fucking hot kiss.

I pulled back and stared at him wide eyed. "To what do I owe the pleasure?" I giggled.

"I fucking missed you."

"You were gone for all of fifteen minutes," I smiled.

"Too long," he breathed, coming back in for more. I put my hand on his jaw to stop him and stared into his deep green eyes. He closed them for just one moment before turning. Charlie had abandoned his attempt to get the cap off at least one of the lip glosses and found his father's leg.

Edward lifted him in the air. "I got something for you," he said, picking up the paper bag and pulling out an oatmeal raisen cookie.

Charlie's face lit up. "Cooooookie," he squealed.

"What do you say?" I prompted.

"Fank ew, daddy," Charlie grinned through a mouthful of cookie.

A clearing throat reminded us that we weren't alone. Edward's jaw tightened as he finally looked at Tanya.

"Hi, Edward. Long time no see," she purred.

He raised his eyebrows. "For good reason. What the fu...hell are you doing here?" He looked at Charlie as he corrected his language. Charlie appeared completely oblivious, but he usually did. It wasn't until later when he repeated something or asked a question that we realized that he had actually heard every word.

"Well that's not nice," she pouted. Her lower lip came out and she batted her eyelashes.

I rolled my eyes. Her display was disgusting and completely transparent.

Edward set Charlie down and took a step towards Tanya. Her eyes lit up for a brief moment.

"Don't play stupid, Tanya," he said so low that I could barely hear him. "I know exactly what you are. You knew all about my son with Bella and you decided not to tell me. Did you think that if I could give you a baby that I'd magically love you? That I'd give you my heart?" Edward's lips curled into a sneer. "Wake the fuck up. I could never give you something that has always belonged to Bella."

Tanya's face looked as if she didn't register a single word he'd said, until she glanced at me. So much fury, so much rage. And then it completely disappeared when her eyes returned to him.

"Oh!" she said throwing him a wink.

_What the fuck?_

"Of course. I. . . I'm sorry, Edward. I know I should have told you, but I didn't know for sure. I just didn't understand how someone could keep a child from his father. I mean, it's such a cruel and heartless thing to do. I'm so happy that you were able to find him. I always knew you'd make a wonderful daddy."

Edward and I just gaped at her.

"I should probably go. I'm supposed to have a date tonight," she said, attempting to be coy. "It was wonderful to see you, Edward. I plan on sticking around for a while so I'm sure we'll run into each other again."

She turned to face me one more time and plastered an extremely fake smile on her lips. "Bella."

And then, she left. Leaving Edward and I completely confounded.

I picked up the clothes that I was buying and paid for them quickly.

When we were out of the store, Edward finally spoke.

"What exactly did she say to you?" he growled.

"A load of shit," I mumbled. "She wants you back."

Edward stopped short. "Excuse me?"

I stopped as well and took a deep breath. My nerves were still frazzled from the encounter. "Can we talk about this later?" I asked tilting my head to Charlie who was watching us with curiosity.

Edward ran his hands through Charlie's hair and tweaked his nose.

"Yeah," he nodded. "We can."

He threaded his hand through mine and pulled me close as we started walking again.

"Never. Going. To. Happen," he whispered staunchly into my ear.

"I know, Edward." I assured.

_Now all we have to do is convince her of that._

XXXXXXXXX

**AN: So...The queen 'B' arrives. What do you think about her? **

**I know, I know, an entire 13000+ word chapter and no lemon. Sorry bout that! Thought I'd give you all a week to cool down. ;o)**

**So I hope some of your questions are starting to get answered; bit by bit, they will be, I promise. Of course, there is so much more, but I do A LOT of set-up for things. **

**Thank you to whoever nominated me for the shimmer award for BEST LEMON! Of course, I announce that on a chapter where there isn't one. LOL. Oh well. The link for voting is on my profile page. **

**Also on my profile page for those of you who didn't see it on my blog, Alice's wedding dress is posted Under chapter 26. **

**I haven't had any time to read this week, but one story that I'm enjoying right now is SpyGames by Jenn1987: Powerful and successful, Isabella Swan held the world in the palm of her hand. Unfortunately for her, so did Edward Cullen.**

**I don't think I've rec'd it yet. LOL. In any case, It's good. B & E are business competitors who just can't resist the temptation of driving each other crazy. Check it out. Oh, and I don't always have my rec's on my favorites lists, but I am working to update that.**


	29. Arresting Developments

**AN: I'm gonna make this quick since I am soooo freaking late. **

**Thank you as always for all the reviews, even those who aren't happy with where this is going or where it has gone. I appreciate you reading. I'm here to tell my story and that's what I'm doing. This has definitely been a learning experience for me. **

**To Mollie and Mel, of course, my dolls, who have helped me despite RL getting in the way. Lots of hugs and kisses.**

**Disclaimer: As usual**

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 27: Arresting Developments

EPOV

This could not be happening. Where the fuck did that bitch come from? There was something seriously wrong with her. Did she think I was playing a game? Did she not remember me telling her to stay the fuck out of my life?

My mind was racing as I drove home from the mall with Bella seated beside me, completely lost in her own thoughts. I wanted to comfort her; to put my arms around her and make sure that she wasn't dwelling on what that fucking cow had said. And I had no idea what kind of garbage had come out of her mouth before I got there.

"Baby, are you okay?" I asked, reaching over to put my hand on her thigh.

She covered my hand with her own. "I. . . Yeah, I'm just confused and frustrated. And trying very hard not to tell you to turn around so I can go back there and rip her head off. What is wrong with her?"

I shook my head. "I have no fucking clue," I said quietly.

"It's like. . . like. . . I don't even know how to respond to what that was like."

I squeezed her thigh.

"She has completely lost her mind. What exactly did you do to her?"

_Uh, what?_

"What the fuck do you mean, what did _I_ do to _her_?" I asked incredulously. I know I wasn't exactly the world's best boyfriend to Tanya, but fucking Christ, I couldn't be solely the one responsible for what she had become, could I?

Bella grimaced. "Shit, that's not what I meant, Edward. I know what she did to you. I just meant. Crap, I don't know what I meant. I'm all messed up."

She rubbed her eyes with her free hand.

"When we get home, you're going to tell me what she said," I said firmly. "Word for word, Bella."

She nodded and let out a long, slow breath. I looked over to see her close her eyes and lean her head against the window. I don't know if she actually fell asleep, but she remained silent for the rest of the car ride. Instead, I listened to Charlie singing a song about a frog in the backseat.

Despite all of the bullshit, I couldn't help but smile as I thought about his innocence. I was thankful that he was young enough that he wouldn't worry about what was going on around him. At least he didn't seem to.

As we got closer to home I looked in the rear view mirror, noticing Charlie's head leaning against the headrest of his car seat. He had a thousand mile stare in his eyes and every time he would blink I wondered if they would open again. I decided not to chance it and took a slight detour.

"Where are we going?" Bella asked lifting her head. Apparently she hadn't actually been asleep, she'd just been ignoring me, or at least that's what it felt like.

I tilted my head backwards and saw her look at Charlie.

"Oh. Good idea."

One trip around the block was enough. By the time we got back to the house five minutes later, Charlie was dozing peacefully.

After putting him into his bed, I joined Bella in the living room. She was pulling her new clothes out of the bags. I sat down on the sofa and turned on the television, making sure the volume was low so we could talk.

"Did you get what you needed?" I asked.

"Some of it. I still have a few things to buy, but I'll do it some other time. I can also order online too if I need to."

I waited for her to start the conversation. I didn't want to force her to talk, but I needed to know what Tanya had said to her. Bella was withdrawing from me, I could feel it. I didn't like it, but I wasn't sure exactly what to say or do.

After ten minutes of her shuffling around and not saying a word, I'd had enough. When she passed by me, I grabbed her wrist. I saw a flash of irritation in her eyes, but it was quickly replaced with acceptance.

I patted the cushion next to me and she sat down, curling her leg up underneath her.

"What did she say to you?" I asked softly, resting my hand on her knee.

"She was just trying to get to me."

"Bella?"

"She was talking out of her ass, Edward. It's not like I believed any of it."

I stared at her, letting her know I wasn't going to allow her to let it go. "What. Did. She. Say."

"She asked me if I was Charlie's nanny."

"Why the fuck would she ask you that? She's known for years?"

"Of course she has. She was trying to play dumb. She said that you told some of your friends in Boston that you were pretending to love your son's mother so that you could get full custody."

I clenched my jaw shut, grinding my teeth as she continued to tell me what Tanya had said to her. Of course it was all bullshit. She was part of my family? Are you fucking kidding me? My family loathed her. And all the bullshit about her breaking up with me because she didn't do long distance relationships?

By the time Bella was done, I thought for sure I had broken a tooth, or ripped all my fucking hair out.

I stood up and started pacing the floor. "You know she's fucking lying, right? You don't actually believe any of that fucking nonsense, do you? I mean...Ahhhhhhhhh. God fucking damn it." I bellowed.

"Shhhhh, Edward, Jesus Christ, keep your voice down," Bella griped. "No, I don't believe a word she said, I already told you that."

"Then why have you been so fucking quiet since we left? You've been shutting me out for the last hour and a half."

"Just because I don't believe it doesn't mean it didn't bother me. And I haven't been shutting you out. Am I not allowed to just have a few moments inside my head to process how I feel? Fuck."

I wanted to throw something. I wanted to break something. I wanted to fucking punch the living shit out of something.

"I gotta go for a run," I growled. "If I don't get some of this out I'm going to fucking burst."

Bella rolled her eyes and I bit my tongue not to lash out at her. "Just go," she mumbled.

I changed as quickly as I could, grabbed my iPhone and arm band and practically bolted out the door. I started out pretty quickly, barely feeling the pavement under my feet. I had probably gone about three miles before I even started to breath heavily. Miles four and five, I started to feel the muscles of my legs as they stretched out underneath me. By mile six, I had a nice sweat dripping from my head and down my neck. By mile seven, a lot of the tension that I had been harboring had faded. I was still angry and frustrated, but the adrenaline that had been coursing through me was exhausted and I no longer felt the urge to destroy things.

I made it back home just over an hour after I left. I needed to apologize to my girl. I knew she had to have been feeling just as wound up as I was and I just left her. I didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. I remembered hearing my mom tell Carlisle once or twice that she just needed to be left alone. I'd like to say that's what I was doing when I took off; giving Bella some space to deal with things her own way. But in all honesty, I took off because I needed to give myself space. I should have stayed. I should have let her vent, scream, cry, do whatever she needed to do. She's the one who was verbally assaulted, not me.

_Fuck, I'm a dick._

I took off my now muddy running shoes and set them aside before making my way into the living room. My sweet girl was lying on the sofa, fast asleep. Her hands were tucked under one of the pillows and her legs were curled up into her chest. Her face, which was usually so calm when she slept, appeared troubled. Her mouth was turned down into a frown and her forehead was furrowed. I hated seeing her like that. Especially when it was because of me.

I covered her with a blanket and bent down in front of her. "I am so sorry, love," I whispered before kissing her temple softly. I could have kept talking, but what would be the point of making an apology when she couldn't hear me.

My clothes were drenched with sweat and I stunk to high heaven. After turning on the shower, I stripped down and stepped in. The hot water ran over my now aching muscles soothing them temporarily. I hadn't stretched at all before my run and they were screaming in protest.

I had just started washing my hair when I heard the door to the bathroom latch and moments later I felt soft hands touching my back. She didn't say a word as she lathered my shoulders with body wash, or when she reached around to cover my chest. But eventually I couldn't let the silence continue. I grabbed her hands and held her to me. Her cheek rested against my back for only a moment before I turned to gather her up in my arms.

"I didn't mean to just leave you," I murmured against her now dripping wet hair.

"It's okay. It was probably best that we have some time to ourselves."

"It's not okay. I was frustrated; I was angry." I trailed my fingers up and down her spine.

"Well at least you didn't go get drunk."

My fingers stopped moving and I closed my eyes. I knew that she didn't mean it to be harsh, but it was like a slap in the face.

"Damn it," I heard her groan softly. "I seem to be having trouble with my verbal filter today. That was supposed to come out as a good thing."

I pulled back, cradling her head in my hands. "It is a good thing, baby."

Bella reached up on her tip toes and pressed her lips against mine. It was when her naked breasts pressed up against my chest that it suddenly dawned on me where we were. And we were fucking naked.

"Mmmmm," Bella moaned as my dick grew hard against her. I had to pull my hips away for a minute to get it situated in a more comfortable position. It was my turn to moan when she slipped her hand around me and started pumping slowly.

"What. . . about. . . Oh, God, that feels good."

"Baby monitor's sitting on the counter," she said, sliding down my body.

My eyes rolled back into my head as she took me into her mouth. I ran my hand through her hair as she built herself a steady rhythm. I couldn't think about anything other than what she was doing to me. Thoughts of Tanya and all of her bullshit disappeared; everything, but my girl disappeared. I needed to see her. I looked down and watched as she brought her lips to the tip, focusing on the head for a few minutes before plunging me back in. The sight was fucking gorgeous. I wasn't going to last long. I was about to lose it.

"Oh, baby," I gasped as she took me all the way back into her throat. I slammed my hand against the wall behind her bracing myself so I didn't fucking collapse. I felt her swallow around my cock and that was it. I held my breath as I pulsed forcefully into her mouth. She took it all and swirled her tongue around my shaft as she released me.

When she stood up, I rested my head against her shoulder. "You are so amazing," I panted.

"I know," she said lightly.

I put my hand on her hip, hoping that she would be favorable to a full round, but she smiled and shook her head.

"Why not?" I whined.

"Charlie's been rustling around for the last couple of minutes. We don't have time."

I listened carefully and sure enough I heard a waking toddler crackling over the monitor. He was talking to himself, or to one of his stuffed critters.

"How did you know that? I didn't hear anything."

"Mom ears," she laughed. "Besides, I'm guessing it was probably a lot harder to hear anything when your focus was on your dick in my mouth."

I chuckled and groaned at the same time . "Yeah, you can say that. But shouldn't your focus have been on my dick in your mouth too."

"Women are much better at multitasking," she winked just before stepping out of the shower. I heard her brushing her teeth and then she left the bathroom altogether.

_Thank God for the multitasking._

I finished up my shower and got dressed. Bella was bundling Charlie up.

"We're going to go play on the play set," she explained as she pulled up the zipper on his coat.

"You want to pway wif us, daddy?" Charlie asked all wide eyed.

_How the hell do you say no to a face like that?_

"Sure I do," I nodded. "I always enjoy pwaying wif you."

I wrapped my arm around Bella's neck and leaned in. "And I especially enjoy playing with mommy," I whispered, letting my breath fan over her ear.

I was trying to be seductive, but Bella just scoffed and pushed me away. "You are such a dork," she laughed.

"You wound me, woman," I feigned being offended while clutching at my chest.

We spent the next two hours running, climbing, sliding, swinging, and laughing. I pushed both Bella and Charlie on the swings, making sure to keep Charlie's lower despite his constant requests for 'higher, daddy, higher'. Yeah, sorry, buddy, I learned my lesson the first time.

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I pulled it out.

**Are you coming over for dinner? ~Mom~**

I looked up at the house and saw my mom standing at the back door. I waved and laughed when I saw her waving back.

"Hey, you wanna go to my parent's house for dinner?" I asked Bella with a crooked grin.

"I don't know if I'm up for that kind of trip, baby," she played along.

"I do, I do," Charlie chirped. His legs were pumping as hard as they could to keep himself going since I had stopped pushing him.

"Two against one," I smirked.

"Did you actually ever want to get lucky again?" Bella asked, shaking her head.

I bowed my head. "Sorry," I sniffed.

Bella jumped off her swing and approached me with a smile. "I love you."

I wrapped my arms around her and rocked us back and forth. "I love you too, baby. Don't ever doubt that."

"I won't."

I felt her squeeze me tightly before she let me go.

"Come on, Charlie, Gramma and Papa are waiting for us," she said, as she walked towards the house.

I swooped my son up and put him on my shoulders before chasing after Bella. He giggled and laughed as I made over exaggerated movements so that he flopped from side to side.

Mom was waiting for us at the door. "Oh, it's cold out there," she shivered. "Get in here and get warm."

I set Charlie down and he shed his coat, leaving it at my feet before walking away with my mom.

I looked at Bella. "Really? Cause, I'm pretty sure if it had been me to leave my coat on the floor like that, Mom would have had my ass."

Bella laughed and picked up the coat, setting it on the back of the sofa, along with hers and mine after I handed it to her.

"He's cuter than you," she teased.

I scoffed, but I couldn't deny it. My kid was fucking adorable.

"Your cheeks are all pink," I said, placing a kiss on either side.

"Your nose is all pink," she responded, pressing her lips against the tip.

"Awww, aren't you two sweet."

I groaned and buried my face into Bella's neck. "Make her go away," I mumbled.

Bella laughed. "I'm going to go help your mom."

I scrunched up my face in protest, but let her go. I turned around and found my sister sitting on the sofa drinking a can of Sprite.

"Hey," I smiled, sitting down next to her.

"Hi."

"What are you doing?"

She let out a long sigh. "Thinking."

"About what?"

"About you."

I must have looked confused because she laughed a little and continued. "You amaze me, Edward."

"How so?" I really didn't have any idea what she was talking about.

"I honestly never thought that you would be this person. The one sitting here next to me. You have become this incredible, nurturing man. And I don't just see it with Charlie, I see it with everyone; everyone you've tried to push away."

"I wasn't trying to push you away," I said quietly.

"Maybe not, but you did...and it hurt. It hurt really, really bad."

I lowered my head.

"I've always known that you weren't the asshole you wanted everyone to think that you were. You were always a good brother. But I saw the way you treated girls. I heard what you said about them immediately after they. . ." when she didn't continue I glanced up and saw her biting at her thumb nail.

I nodded to let her know that I understood what she meant. Right after they'd give me what I wanted, I usually trash talked them. I had no respect for the girls who gave it up so easily, but that didn't mean I wouldn't take what they were offering.

"I didn't know what changed when we went to Boston. I mean, it was like, all of the sudden you shut us out and I didn't understand why."

I thought back to when we first moved east. I remember the guilt I felt every time I looked at Alice, knowing what I had done to Bella.

"Physically you were still there. You still laughed and joked and did what you'd always done, but emotionally? You stopped talking to me, Edward. I had always been your confidant, but then, poof," she threw her hands up in the air to emphasize her point. "I had to hear from Chelsea every time something happened; or Emmett, or even Rose. Everyone else knew before me when you tossed Tanya out and why."

"I'm sorry, Allie, I didn't realize." I hung my head shamefully.

"No, I get it now. Now that I know what happened with Bella I understand completely. I spent years parading her in front of you, figuring you'd eventually get used to her being around and your obsession with her would disappear. I thought that you had." Alice shook her head.

"I'm not going to apologize for not wanting you to pursue her. I can't. She was my best friend. I was trying to keep her safe, but in retrospect, I did the exact opposite."

I put my arm around my sister and she rested her head on my shoulder. I squeezed her tightly trying to comfort her. This had obviously been bothering her for a while.

"I'm sorry I interfered. I'm sorry I didn't see what she could have been for you. I'm sorry I wasn't a better friend for her after we left."

"It's not like you could have known," I sighed.

"No, but if I had really tried; I mean, really tried, she would have eventually told me about the pregnancy."

We were silent for a few minutes, letting her apology linger.

"What is it about the holidays that makes us all sappy and apologetic," I chuckled.

"I don't know," Alice sniffed. "Are you all sappy and apologetic too?"

I snorted. "I have spent the last four months being all sappy and apologetic, I'm getting used to it."

I felt her vibrate in silent laughter against me.

"It's kinda nice to have my brother back."

"It's kinda nice to be back." I teased. "So, I need you to do me a favor."

It was time to change the subject.

"Sure, what's up?"

"Bella and I ran into Tanya."

Alice's face gave nothing away, but her eyes burned and her body tensed. "Tanya?"

"Yeah. She's lost her fucking mind," I growled.

Alice cleared her throat and looked away from me as she took a sip of her soda.

"I know, okay, I know she's always been a little on the crazy side."

"A little, Edward? She took out my bedroom window with a fucking brick when I asked you not to let her sleep at our apartment anymore."

I grimaced. How could I possibly let that woman terrorize my family for as long as I did?

"She was going through my purse in the middle of the night. Did you know that she sent Jasper texts from my phone telling him that I was happier without him and he should just stay in New York?"

"What?" This was news to me. Neither Jasper nor Alice had ever told me about that.

"Yeah, those last three months when he refused to talk to me. She had been sending him texts from my phone. Graphic ones. And not good graphic ones."

"Well why the fuck didn't you say anything?"

"I did, Edward. After I finally figured out what was happening I voiced my suspicions to you on several occasions."

I balanced my elbows on my knees and buried my face in my hands.

"You cannot let her get to Bella. I'm not even kidding when I say that she will do everything in her power to tear you two apart. She swore to me, on her way out the door that last time, that you two were soul mates and that you would go back to her once you realized it."

"That's what she told Bella too."

"You let her get that close?"

"I couldn't help it. I was getting coffee and when I came back they were already talking."

"Well I hope you put her in her fucking place."

"I tried, but it's like she didn't get it. She kept winking at me like we had some sort of secret. Besides, I couldn't go all out, Charlie was there."

"Well you need to. . ."

"Alice!" I snapped. "I know what I fucking need to do. Now please listen to me. If she comes anywhere near the house when you're here, I need you to call the cops. They're already keeping an eye on things because of this fuckhead that seems to be following Bella. I don't think she'll do anything, but I don't want her anywhere near Bella and Charlie. Or me, for that matter."

"Have you told Mom and Dad?"

"I'm going to. I'm sure they'll enjoy hearing just how much they made Tanya feel a part of this family."

Alice's nose wrinkled in disgust and I had to laugh.

"Come on, sis, let's go see if we can get some grub." I stood up and reached my hand out. She grabbed it and I pulled her up easily. I threw my arm around her and she elbowed me in the ribs.

"Moooooom, Alice elbowed me," I whined as we entered the kitchen.

"Did not, he tried to smother me with his big, heavy arms."

"She's lying."

"Am not."

"Are to."

"I'm re-thinking this whole other baby thing, Edward. I'm not sure I can handle the sibling rivalry stuff." Bella frowned before realizing what she had said. Then her hands flew to her mouth.

"What?" Alice and my mom both yelped at the same time.

"Oh shit, that's not what I meant," Bella groaned.

"Are you pregnant?" Alice squealed.

"No!" Bella shouted as I barked out a huge laugh.

"You are!"

"I'm not. Oh my God. I am not pregnant."

"What's pwegnat?" Charlie asked.

"Something mommy is not. Edward?"

"What?" I snickered.

"This is so not funny."

"I think it's hilarious," I snorted.

"Bella?" My mom said. I couldn't help but notice that she actually sounded kind of hopeful.

"I am not pregnant, Esme. I have an IUD.

"What exactly is an IUD?" Alice asked.

I would have made fun of her for not knowing, but I didn't actually know either. I probably should have googled that shit, but I never got around to doing it.

"Charlie, can you go find Papa Carlisle and Uncle Jasper and tell them it's time for dinner please?" Bella asked.

Within second Charlie was racing down the hallway to Carlisle's office, shouting out his name."

"It's a form of birth control that they put into my uterus. It lasts for up to ten years."

"So, you have to wait ten years to have another baby?" Alice asked, frowning.

_God I hope not._

Bella shook her head. "No. If I want to have another baby, I have my OB-GYN take it out. It's to prevent accidental pregnancies."

She bit her lip. "I love Charlie and I wouldn't trade him for the world, but I wasn't about to take any chances."

She looked guilty when she said this. It was fucking ridiculous to feel bad about wanting to prevent another pregnancy regardless of how we felt about Charlie, but I pulled her to me and kissed her head simply to let her know that I understood.

"So what's for dinner, Ma?" I changed the subject.

"Oh, I made Grandma Cullen's Chicken Cacciatore."

Charlie returned with Carlisle who was followed by Jasper and everyone sat down at the table. I poured some red wine for everyone and set out a sippy cup of milk for Charlie.

"Mommy are you my nanny?" Charlie asked about halfway through dinner.

Bella's fork hit her plate with a loud clang, making me and everyone else flinch.

"Where did you hear that, sweetheart?" My mom asked, confusion plastered all over her features.

"Dat wady in da store said mommy was my nanny."

"What Lady?"

"Um, let's not. . ." I shook my head trying to indicate that it wasn't a good time.

"No, baby, I'm not your nanny. A nanny is someone who takes care of other people's kids."

"Wike Riwey?"

_Oh fuck. This is getting worse and worse._

Alice was looking wide eyed between me and Bella. Jasper had his head down, studying his food. My mom and Carlisle glanced at each other and then at Bella, me and Charlie.

Bella swallowed and I thought for sure with the amount of force that she was putting on her fork that it was about to bend in half. "No, Charlie. Riley is just mommy's friend."

I saw Charlie's little mind working and decided it was time to step in. "Tell Gramma and Papa about the game we played outside," I prompted.

Charlie took a deep breath and started explaining all about the how he was Nemo and I was Marlin and mommy was Dori and we had to find him because he was lost.

I felt Bella's hand slip into mine under the table and she squeezed it tightly. I squeezed back turning to her and giving her a reassuring smile.

"Thank you," she mouthed. I winked at her and went back to eating, my hand remaining intertwined with Bella's.

When dinner was finished, Bella and I took the plates into the kitchen while Jasper and Alice took Charlie down to the basement.

"What's going on?" My mom asked as she and Carlisle sat down at the island.

"Tanya," Bella breathed out.

My mom's eyebrows raised in surprise. "As in Denali, Tanya?"

"That's the one," I grumbled.

"What. . . . I don't understand. She's in town?"

"Who knows," Bella answered. "She said she was visiting her parents for the holidays and that she was sticking around."

"So, what does that have to do with you being a nanny?"

"She was being a bitch," I snarled. "She's known about Charlie for years, but pretended that she didn't. She asked Bella if I had hired her to be Charlie's nanny."

I repeated what Bella had told me to my parents only needing her to help me out a few times. When I was done, my parents had the same reaction that Alice and I had. Shock, confusion, irritation, anger.

"Wait, so, she thinks that after the shitty relationship the two of you had and the way that it ended that you. . . still want to be with her?" Carlisle asked, completely dumbfounded.

"I showed her how likely that was when I got there," I explained. "But it's like she didn't get it. Like she actually believed her own story."

"You need to stay away from that woman," Mom said firmly.

"We know," I agreed. "I'm really hoping we won't see her again.

XXXXXXX

Monday mornings always suck. When the alarm started blaring in my ear at six a.m. I wanted to throw the fucking thing across the room.

"Turn it off," Bella groaned, rolling over to face away from me. I slammed my hand against the snooze button, knowing that in nine minutes I'd have to do it all over again.

I reached over, wrapping my arm around her waist so that I could bring her closer to me. She grunted, but otherwise let me move her. I snaked my hand under her t-shirt and up her ribcage to grope at her tit.

"Stop," she grouched, trying to shake me off. I let my hand drop to her stomach and instead I ground my morning wood into her ass.

"Edwaaaard."

"I want you," I said in a gravelly '_I just woke up_' voice.

"You always want me. I'm too fucking tired," she mumbled. " Let me sleep."

I continued my groping and grinding, slipping my hand into her sleep pants a few times to try and get her to respond. Each time she grabbed my wrist and moved my hand to the safety of her stomach.

With one last attempt she rolled away from me and got out of bed. "Fine, I'm getting up."

I let my head fall backwards onto the pillow.

_Well that's the exact opposite of what I wanted._

I listened to Bella's annoyed fumbling; stomping feet, closing drawers louder than she really needed to and finally, practically slamming the bathroom door. . . and locking it.

"Fuck," I growled.

The rest of the morning was just as shitty. Charlie woke up with a snotty nose and a wet bed and refused to eat anything other than potato chips and milk. In our attempts at getting our shit together, I ran into Bella, who had a scalding hot cup of coffee in her hands. She spilled it all over her arms and her shirt and then dropped the mug, shattering it. Her skin welted up immediately and I had to run to the main house for the first aid kit.

_Note to self: Buy first aid kit for the apartment. Oh, and a fire extinguisher. We don't have one of those either._

Bella changed and I rubbed some of the cream over the angry red burns. She tried to play it off like it was no big deal, but I could see it in her face that it really fucking hurt. Seeing her in pain like that made me feel like crap. I went to kiss them better, but thought better of it. I was afraid of hurting her further so I just hovered my lips above her skin instead. She smiled slightly at the gesture before returning to the frantic morning pace.

We finally got out of the house about ten minutes late and Bella had to drop me off at the clinic before taking Charlie to pre-school so I wouldn't be late again.

If I thought my day couldn't get any worse, I was wrong. My first patient was a two-year-old with a crayon bit shoved up his nose. Every time I got anywhere near him with the tweezers he started shrieking like a fucking banshee.

"That's why I brought him here," his mother, who couldn't have been more than eighteen, said timidly.

I ended up having to call Heidi in to put him in the papoose and hold his head. I swore right there and then, that if I could avoid it, I would never, ever, allow Charlie or any other kids Bella and I had in that fucking thing. The poor baby was screaming and crying. He was scared out of his fucking mind. And I had done that to him.

I finally got the crayon out and tried to make him feel better by giving him a sucker, but he refused to even look at me. I felt like shit and ended up having to take a fifteen minute break.

When I got back in I had to watch as Heidi stuck a huge fucking needle in some guy's dick to take a sample from an infected spot. That shit hurt my junk and I was just watching. . . and wincing. Then, I got puked on by an eight year old who had obviously had SpaghettiO's for lunch.

My lunch was spent locked in the shower room trying to erase the stench from my nostrils. Luckily, Heidi brought me back a burrito from the burrito-mobile that frequented the warehouse across the street.

I got about two fucking minutes to check in with Bella and make sure that she was okay and that her burns weren't blistering before I was called back in.

"Edward?"

"I gotta go, baby, I'll see you in a few hours."

I hung up and Heidi handed me a chart. "She requested you. Laceration to upper thigh, you want me in there with you?"

I frowned. I had four patients who frequently requested me and I wasn't looking forward to a single one of them. "Let me take a look first. I'll let you know."

She nodded. I didn't even look at the name on the chart before opening up the door. Big. Fucking. Mistake.

"So, what can I do for you today, Ms. . .Oh fuck!"

"I would think you'd know my name fairly well by now."

Tanya was sitting on the table in front of me, naked from the waist down.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

"She told me to take off my clothes."

"Here, Tanya? What the fuck are you doing here? This is a free clinic for people who don't have any fucking money," I growled, throwing one of the paper blankets at her. "Jesus Christ, cover yourself up."

"It's not like it's anything you haven't seen before," she huffed. "I don't have a doctor nearby. I cut my leg and heard you were working here. I can pay you."

"So go to fucking Urgent Care."

"But I don't know anyone at Urgent Care," she whimpered. If I didn't know her as well as I did, I might have felt sorry for her, but I didn't.

I backed up and opened the door. "Edward!" she screeched. "I don't want the whole fucking world to see my pussy."

I ignored her completely and stepped out into the hallway, shutting the door. "Heidi?" I called.

She poked her head out of the file room.

"I need you."

"Aww, honey, I need you too," she teased. When I didn't return her amusement she frowned. "What's the matter?"

I ran my hands through my hair. I was torn between excusing myself from her case or sucking it up and being a professional. I really, really wanted to go in there and tell her fuck off, but I also didn't want to lose my position.

"Can you supervise while I examine and suture this wound please?"

"Yeah, sure. Is everything okay?"

"It's alright, I just would rather someone be in there with me."

I opened the door and let Heidi enter first. Tanya had covered herself with the blanket. "Ms. Denali, this is Heidi, she's here to supervise and assist.

"Hi," Tanya said flatly.

Heidi nodded and grabbed a pair of non-latex gloves for both herself and for me.

"Thanks," I said under my breath.

"Lie back on the table, please."

Tanya did as I asked. She had a gauze pad stuck to the inside of her upper thigh. It was probably two inches away from her twat. Thankfully, she had put her underwear back on in the few minutes that I had been in the hallway. I didn't want to go anywhere near her crotch if I could help it.

I lifted up the gauze and Heidi handed me a fresh one soaked in Bactine. I cleaned the wound and wiped it down.

_Motherfucker!_

I glanced up at Heidi and she lifted an eyebrow. She had definitely seen the same thing.

"How did you get this?" I asked.

"Oh, you know, I was hanging out with a friend of mine and he bumped me into something that had a piece of sharp metal poking out."

"This is an awfully clean cut for an accidental injury."

"Hmm," Tanya shrugged.

Heidi handed me the suture kit and I bent down. "This is gonna hurt a little."

"I remember a few times you've said that before," Tanya laughed.

I had to pull back. I should have just stabbed her and let her learn for herself, but I was a professional. "You have to stay still, please," I ground out.

"Ow," she squeaked as I ran the needle through her skin.

_Good, at least I'm not making the experience pleasurable for her._

"So you two know each other?" Heidi asked, breaking the silence that I was hoping would last the rest of the visit. Fuck.

"We were high school sweethearts," Tanya piped up. "And college. We dated for four years."

I snorted.

"Oh?" I could feel Heidi's eyes on me, but I didn't look up at her. I needed to get this fucking wound closed and get the hell out of the room.

"We were not sweethearts," I grumbled.

"I thought we were going to get married and have babies too, but seems like fate had other plans for us," Tanya sighed. "At least for the time being."

I could feel my blood pressure rising and my hand started to shake slightly.

"I think it's probably best for you to stay quiet if you want this to be a clean suture," I warned.

"You've given me plenty of scars, Edward, what's one more?"

I stopped what I was doing and sat up straight.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Sorry, I know I'm not supposed to talk about in front of other people" she bent her head as if she were embarrassed.

I looked up at Heidi, completely confused. She had a questioning look on her face. I didn't respond to Tanya, instead I went back to work on the wound.

"You're all done," I said standing up throwing away the needle and gloves. Heidi stopped me just outside the door.

"I have to talk to her, Edward," she whispered.

"What? Why?"

"That was some heavy insinuations she made."

"You can't honestly believe that I would. . ."

"Of course I don't, but I can't just pretend I didn't hear that."

"She's a fucking lunatic."

"I'll keep that in mind."

Heidi knocked on the door and then disappeared back into the room.

I wanted to put my ear to the door like a little kid, but I was afraid to. Instead I went to the front.

"Sharon, that woman that just came in here, Ms. Denali?"

"Yes," Sharon smiled. "She said she was friend of yours."

"She's not. And she's filthy rich, with insurance. If she ever comes in here again, direct her to Urgent Care or the hospital, please."

"Oh, but, she said you told her to come here."

"I didn't," I scoffed.

I had to see another patient, but by the time I got out, Heidi was waiting for me in the break room.

"Are you cheating on Bella?" she asked directly.

"What? No? Is that what she told you?"

"Look, I know this is personal shit, Edward and I don't mean to pry. I talked to her because I have an obligation to do so when things like that are said. She said you never physically hurt her, but that you lied and cheated on her for years, even knocking Bella up behind her back."

I couldn't exactly deny that, but I wasn't about to give Tanya any credibility. "We had a fucked up relationship. She was just as guilty. I've loved Bella since I was twelve. It's only ever been her for me."

"That woman seems to believe that you're planning on leaving Bella as soon as you get custody of Charlie."

"I told you she's a fucking lunatic."

"So you and Bella aren't having any problems?"

"We're having all sorts of problems, but not with each other. Trust me when I tell you that we're going to get married and have a whole bunch more babies."

Heidi smiled and did the girly silent squeal thing before grabbing my face. "Good, because I like you guys together. She's good for you."

Yeah, she certainly was good for me.

XXXXX

"She did what?" Bella yelled as she pulled shit from the pantry to start dinner.

"Don't worry about it. Heidi was in there with me."

"She was in there when Tanya spread her legs for you? God, I can't believe you saw her fucking coochie."

"That's not what happened. No, she wasn't, but I didn't get within five feet. I didn't even look. I turned around and got Heidi to supervise as quickly as I could."

Bella wrinkled up her nose. "Why couldn't someone else have done it?"

"Someone else could have, but I was trying to be professional. If I'm working in the ER I can't not treat a patient because I might have a personal issue with them."

"But you're not working in the ER yet, Edward. You're a volunteer at a free clinic. Next time, get someone else to do it. Please."

"Hopefully there won't be a next time. I told the front office to send her to Urgent Care or the hospital."

"How the hell did she even know where you worked?"

_That is an excellent question._

And then I remembered. "You said she was with Jessica at the mall, right? She probably told her."

"Oh, yeah, the other one," Bella grumbled.

She was slamming things down, obviously upset and for good reason. I slid my arms around her waist and held her tightly.

"Fuck, baby, I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry you're having to deal with my shit. If you want to leave, say the word and we'll go."

"Go where?" she asked in a defeated voice.

"Anywhere you want."

"I've got my work?"

"Which will be done after next week."

"You've got your work."

"I can volunteer anywhere."

"Our families."

"They'll understand."

"It's not that easy."

"We can make it that easy. I want you happy. I want you safe. I want you to be able to walk down the street and not be reminded of what a fucking asshole I've been."

"Right now, I'm okay," she said turning around to face me. Let's get through the holidays. You've got an interview at UW next week too right?"

I nodded. I had gotten my interview letter from UW a few days before Thanksgiving. I had also received my interview letter from John's Hopkins, but hadn't done anything with it yet. I had set my UW interview for the day that Bella was scheduled to present their study findings with Luke so that we could ride up together.

"Let's get through the holidays. Let's go on a vacation; and then we'll make a decision."

"Speaking of," I grinned crookedly. "I secured our dates to Vail."

"Really?" Bella's eyes lit up.

"Uh huh. They had a cancellation about thirty seconds before I called and we have December 30th to January 5th all to ourselves."

Bella hummed in my arms. We were so wrapped up in each other that we almost didn't notice the little hands that pawed at our legs. I looked down and laughed.

"Me too," Charlie grinned.

Bella and I lifted him together, bringing him into our snuggle.

All too soon, Bella pulled away, transferring Charlie completely to me so that she could finish making dinner.

Charlie and I made our way into the living room and I turned on the television set to Glee. Charlie was more interested in his little people, but he did get up and dance every time a song came on.

The doorbell chimed and Charlie jumped up. "I wanna get it!" he said racing away.

I knew the deadbolt was locked so he couldn't actually get the door open, but I didn't want to take any chances.

"Charlie, you need to wait for me," I called as I stood up.

I found him at the door, his little fingers desperately twisting the lock. I put my hand over his and bent down.

"You cannot open the door without me or mommy standing right next to you, do you understand that?" I asked.

He nodded, his lip slightly protruding and trembling. I put my thumb on it and smiled at him. "I'm not mad at you. I just want you to be safe. We don't know who is on the other side of that door, okay?" I removed my thumb and grabbed his chin.

"Okay, daddy," Charlie said, immediately sucking his lip in between his teeth.

"Good."

I stood up, unlocking the deadbolt and opening up the door.

"Grampa!" Charlie screeched, his face instantly lighting up as he dove into Chief Swan's arms.

He caught the little boy and lifted him up.

"Hey, Chief," I smiled. "Come on in."

"Nice lesson," he said quietly as he entered. "No time like the present to teach him that."

"The fact that I even _have_ to teach him that, makes me incredibly sad."

"I know, son," he said, removing one hand from around Charlie to pat me on the back. "Every parent has those moments. Just wait until you have to talk to him about sex!"

He stopped walking, setting Charlie down and looking me directly in the eyes. I was covering my mouth with my hand, trying to hide my laughter, but it wasn't working. My shoulders were shaking as I failed miserably to control myself.

"Hmmm," he said, his mustache twitching.

He didn't have to say what he was thinking; I already knew. I was probably the last person who should be giving anyone, including my own son, the sex talk.

"It's a good thing we have a while to figure that one out," I snorted. "Bella's in the kitchen."

"Hi, Daddy," Bella grinned as we came around the corner.

"Hi, Bells."

Bella wiped her hands on a dish cloth and came over to hug her father. "What's going on?"

"I've got the DNA results from the. . . uh. . . prophylactic."

Bella raised her eyebrows. "You mean the condom?" she teased.

Chief Swan cleared his throat, looking both uncomfortable and annoyed. "Yeah, that. It seems that Ms. Jenks was the one who broke into your apartment. Well, at least she was one of the perpetrators. They found her DNA on the outside."

"And on the inside?" I asked hesitantly.

"Came back to a guy named James Hunter. Arrested for petty theft last year in Tacoma. I didn't bring the file with me, but do you think you could stop in at the station tomorrow?"

"I'm working tomorrow instead of Wednesday, but we can stop by on our way home. Why?" Bella asked, glancing over at me.

"I think he might be the guy who's been bothering you. He fits the description you gave me. If you see him again, you need to call me. DO NOT approach him."

The chief had been extremely upset when I told him about Bella's encounter at the park with the creep. As unsettling as it was though, there hadn't been any real proof that he was actually following her. We lived in a relatively rural area and were always running into familiar faces. He hadn't approached her and there wasn't anything that could tie him to her in the slightest. Until now. If this guy's jizz was found in a condom in our house, we had the evidence we needed to go after him.

"I'm serious, Bells," he warned.

"I know, Dad. I won't."

"Wait, so this guy is connected to Cammy?" I asked finally putting together everything that was going on.

"Appears that way."

"So, have they talked to him about the fire?"

Chief Swan shook his head. "They haven't located him yet. The lab results just came in today so they're still trying to put things together, but it might explain some things."

"Things?" Bella questioned.

Her dad sighed. "I can't discuss the details I know and they've stopped giving me additional ones for some reason, but I think they're close to making an arrest in the case."

Well, I guess that's good news.

"Do you want to stay for dinner, Chief?" I asked.

He nodded, looking almost grateful that I had move the topic of conversation.

"Sounds good. What are we having?"

XXXXXX

BPOV

I walked into my office on Tuesday with a good feeling. I had one week until our presentation to our funders at the University of Washington and then I was done. I could leave Luke and all of his connections to Cammy. I could sit down and figure out what exactly I wanted to do with my life and I could start making those plans with Edward.

Unfortunately Luke didn't seem to share my enthusiasm. He was deep in thought when I sat down at my desk, not even acknowledging my arrival.

"Luke, are you okay?" I asked.

He jumped slightly and looked kind of like a deer in the headlights for a brief moment before smiling softly.

"Oh, hi, Bella. Yeah, I'm fine. It's been a rough few weeks, but I think it's all going to work out, you know? The study is just about wrapped up. I think we're good to go until the presentation next week."

"Really?" I asked, genuinely excited.

"Yeah. I mean, we still need to talk about how it's all going to be presented, but other than that, you're free."

I leaned back in my chair and let out a huge breath. "You have no idea how wonderful that sounds right now. We have had so much shit happening to us lately. I need a freaking vaca. . . ."

The door to our office flew open suddenly, crashing against the wall. My head shot up as four police officers, weapons drawn, flooded into the room.

"Police. Hands up, both of you."

My hands were up in the air faster than I ever thought possible. I was absolutely petrified. Three officers, including detective Laurent, stood with their guns trained on Luke while the other had his pointed straight at me.

_What the hell is going on?_

I looked over at Luke with wide eyes, expecting to see him in a similar state, but he wasn't. Instead, his head was bowed and his eyes were shut.

_Oh Fuck._

"Luke?"

He didn't respond.

"Get your hands up," one of the officers demanded. He was still several yards away and seemed to be prepared for anything."

Luke slowly raised his hands into the air, just above his head. The officer closest to him inched forward. "Stand up," he said nudging his gun in an upwards motion.

I watched, completely stunned, as Luke did as he was told.

"Hands clasped behind your head, slowly."

_Oh my God!_

I was pretty sure I was going to puke at that moment. My heart was racing and I could already feel the sweat dripping down my neck. I looked up at the officer who still had his gun pointed at me. His expression was apologetic and I knew at that moment that they weren't there for me.

The instant Luke's hands were behind his head, the three remaining officers descended on him. One grabbing him roughly and cuffing him behind his back. The fourth lowered his weapon so that I was no longer staring into it's barrel.

"Lucas Alexander, you are under arrest for the murder of Camille Jenks. Anything you say or do can be held against you in a court of law."

**XXXXXXX**

**Ahhh! Who saw that coming? What happens now? Is that really a cliffie? I didn't intend for it to be, but I guess it depends on your definition. I'm adding this after the posting just b/c there's been some confusion between Ms. Jenks (i.e. Cammy aka Camille Jenks) and Mrs. Jane. Mrs. Jane is in no way a part of anything bad!**

**You're getting some answers, but are they the right ones? :-P Just remember I like my twists and turns.**

**Please allow me a little creative freedom with how much contact E has with patients. He's received training and certification, but he's not a doctor yet. I realize that in real life he probably wouldn't be able to do some of these things, but for the sake of the story, I gave him a little extra responsibility. Thank you!**

**Yes, again w/ the lack of citrus. Many of you are fine with that, some are missing it. As much as I like writing them, it just didn't fit this chapter.**

**Oh, and check out the inspire awards: inspiredfanficawards . blogspot . com / ?zx=45c9cdc5aebfde93 UP has been nominated for Favorite Villian for Cammy (LOL) Favorite Edward (Who woulda thought when we started this huh?) And Favorite Angst. I'll put the link on my profile. Thank you for the nominations. :o) **

**Rec: Quiet Storm by SexyLexiCullen: My eyes went wide. He was about to show his-. "Let me see it baby," I moaned, ready for it. He smiled and pulled out a gun. "See?" I screamed, falling from his lap, and landing in the garbage that fills my living room.**

**I've been reading this one for the last two days. Bella is independent, stubborn and completely broke. Edward is a bad, bad boy who cannot decide what he wants. Alice and Jasper are completely ghetto, Rose is a pregnant ex-stripper. Needless to say, I'm enjoying myself. **


	30. Holding it Together

**AN: Okay, here we go. I'm not sure what to categorize this chapter as so I'll just leave it up to you all. :o) **

**Thank you, as always for reading and reviewing. Again, I realize that these chapters must take some time to read and I always appreciate that you give me the opportunity. **

**Thank you to D. Pattinson for rec'ing me in her story The Hot Corner. Please let me know when you do see me rec'd somewhere. I don't always realize it when it's done and I do like to thank people for pimping me. Saying that, there are a lot of you who rec me regularly on twitter, facebook, and just word of mouth. I don't know everyone's names, but I want you to know how much I appreciate it. **

**Thank you to Mollie and Mel for always keeping me on track and sane. I heart you both big time.**

**This Chapter has some seriously M rated material. Please, please, please don't go there if you're not old enough. I've put (~~~) in front of and at the end of the section. **

**Disclaimer as usual. No copyright infringement intended. **

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 28: Holding it Together

* * *

_"Lucas Alexander, you are under arrest for the murder of Camille Jenks. Anything you say or do can be held against you in a court of law."_

"Wh. . .what's going on?" I begged as they continued to read Luke his rights on their way out the door.

The officer closest to me holstered his gun. He must have been in his early thirties, tall and thin with sandy blond hair and dark eyes. I saw him exchange a look with Detective Laurent just before he left the office.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Swan. You weren't supposed to be here," he said softly.

"What do you mean I wasn't supposed to be here?"

_How long have they been planning this?_

"We were under the impression that you didn't work on Tuesdays."

"I don't, I switched days. You. . . you couldn't have fucking warned me?"

"Your father's going to kill me." I heard him mumble to himself.

"You know my dad?"

His head snapped up. "Yes, sorry, I'm officer Stevens. Your dad is a friend of mine. He's really not going to like this though."

I narrowed my eyes in question.

He smiled awkwardly. "Um, we were trying not to involve you, but in some things we had no choice."

"What the hell are you talking about? I thought Luke had an air-tight alibi?"

"You thought that because that's what we told your father," Detective Laurent said, returning to the room. "We needed time to put everything together and if he even suspected that your boss was involved in this, there is no way he would have allowed you to come back. We didn't want anything to tip him off before we had our warrant."

"I still don't understand. Luke couldn't have done that. He's not a murderer."

"Look, there's not a lot we can tell you right now, but we have a witness who put him there within half hour of when that fire started. We have our guy." Detective Laurent shifted and shook his head. "It's unfortunate that you had to be involved in this."

"I just had a fucking gun pointed at my head and that's all you can say?" I screeched.

Officer Stevens winced, but covered it quickly when Detective Laurent turned his head to look at him.

"Like I said," he frowned. "It's unfortunate, but there are precautions that we have to take when making an arrest. You have my card if you have any questions?"

I nodded, my mouth still wide open in shock.

"Good. Officer Stevens, will you assist Ms. Swan in anything else that she needs?"

"Yes, sir."

Detective Laurent scanned the room one last time before his eyes landed on me. He tipped his head, turned and left.

I stared after him and then at the empty doorway. My breath caught and then stumbled. My chest ached. My eyes burned.

"I. . . I. . .I just had a fucking gun pointed at my head," I choked out.

I couldn't think straight. I couldn't regulate my breathing. It felt like I was going to have a heart attack. My heart was beating frantically against my chest like it was trying to rip its way out.

"Is there someone I can call for you?" Officer Stevens asked quickly, probably realizing that I was about to completely lose it.

"Uh, um, Edward. I sh. . . should call my boyfriend."

I reached for my phone, but Officer Stevens stopped me. "Would you like me to do it?"

_No, not really._

But, I was afraid that the minute I heard his voice, any semblance of composure that I still had would disappear.

I nodded my head and he slipped the phone from my hand.

"Is it under Edward?"

Again, I nodded.

I saw him hit a button and the phone lifted to his ear.

"Yes, hello, this is Officer Kyle Stevens with the Port Angeles Sheriff's Department, is this Edward? Sir. Sir, calm down. She's fine." He glanced at me. "She's a little shaken up so she asked me to call you. I'm not at liberty to discuss that over the phone." I watched as he held the phone away from his ear and I could hear Edward's voice shouting.

"Sir, please. I understand that you're upset, but if you could just come pick her up. . . Yes, we're at her office."

He looked at the phone for a moment with a confused and somewhat annoyed look on his face before handing it back to me. "I believe he's on his way."

"Okay," I whispered, wrapping my arms around my body to keep from falling apart. My whole body was trembling. I closed my eyes and waited.

XXXXXXXX

EPOV

Sometimes I loved filing days. After Monday's bullshit, I had never been so happy to be shoved back into the dusty room.

Apparently Heidi had talked with Dr. Oleander and given him the rundown of what had happened with Tanya. Needless to say, when I got into the office that morning, he told me that if and when she ever returned, not to even acknowledge her; he would take care of it.

"He's had his fair share of crazies," Heidi explained as I poured myself a cup of coffee. "He had a woman a few years back claiming that he had impregnated her while she was here getting looked at for some stomach pains."

"Fuck, are you kidding me?"

Heidi shook her head. "There was a huge review panel and he had to have a physician cover for him. We had to search through our files. Luckily the visit where she claimed to have gotten pregnant was one in which Jackie was there for."

Jackie was one of the other nurses who worked for the clinic part-time.

"It was a mess, but it turned out that she had made three other similar claims over a four year period. Charges were dismissed and, of course, she never actually had a baby either. You just need to protect yourself, Edward. Don't be stupid, you don't want to mess up your medical career because of some crackpot."

"Thanks," I shrugged.

"No problem," she smiled. "Now go file."

I spent about fifteen minutes looking through the piles of paperwork sitting in a tray and trying to alphabetize them. It was easier that way, since the charts were all in order by last name. I was sitting on the floor with my legs out in front of me when my phone buzzed. I grabbed it, looking down and seeing Bella and Charlie's smiling faces back at me.

"Hey, baby," I cooed.

"Yes, hello, this is Officer Kyle Stevens with the Port Angeles Sheriff's Department, is this Edward?"

_What the fuck?_

I looked back down to my phone. The call was definitely being made from Bella's cell phone. My heart jumped up into my throat.

"Why the fuck are you calling from my girlfriend's phone? Where is she?" I snapped. "Let me talk to her. Is she okay?"

"Sir. Sir, calm down. She's fine." "She's a little shaken up so she asked me to call you."

"What the fuck do you mean, she's shaken up? What the hell happened to her?" I stood up quickly knocking files to the floor in my near state of panic. Every possible scenario passed through my head. Car accident? Something medical? She was a healthy twenty-three year old woman, what kind of medical problem could she have had? Fuck! Had something happened to Charlie?

"I'm not at liberty to discuss that over the phone."

"You better fucking tell me something," I bellowed. This fucker was starting to piss me off. I couldn't give two shits if he was a cop, I wanted some fucking answers.

I looked up and saw that both Heidi and Sharon were staring at me with wide eyes. I must have been yelling pretty loud if Sharon could hear me all the way at the front of the office.

"Sir, please. I understand that you're upset, but if you could just come pick her up. . ."

"You have no idea how fucking upset I am right now. Where is she? At work?"

"Yes, we're at her office."

I hung up the phone, not even bothering to say goodbye.

"I gotta go," I said, jumping up and practically running to the break room to get my shit.

"Yeah, we heard," Heidi said, following me. "What's going on?"

"I don't know. Um, can you tell Dr. Oleander. . . ."

"You're fine, Edward," he said coming into the room. "I'm guessing by all the foul language and shouting that just came out of your mouth that it's an emergency, so go."

Normally I would have cared if he was upset, which it didn't seem like he was, but at the moment, I did not. All I could think about was getting to Bella. I had no idea what 'She's a little shaken' meant.

I bolted out the door and into the car. It's not like Bella's work was that far away, but it seemed like it took for fucking ever to get there.

There was one cruiser sitting in the parking lot. There were a few people milling about, but nothing too out of the ordinary.

_She's okay, he said she's okay. But I didn't hear her voice. They always say that, don't they? And then you get there and they tell you that they're sorry for your loss._

What the fuck had happened?

I threw open the door to her office. My heart was in my fucking throat. Bella's head snapped up and her bloodshot eyes met mine. It looked like she'd been crying. Some part of my brain registered that there was a cop sitting on Luke's desk, but I just couldn't fucking care.

"Bella?" I breathed. I had no idea how it happened, but a fraction of a second later and she was in my arms, melting into my body as though we were no longer two separate people. Her hands slipped into my coat and her fingers beneath my scrubs, practically clawing at me in her attempts to get closer.

"What happened, baby?" I asked softly in her ear. "Are you okay?"

"No," she whispered. "I'm not."

She didn't say anything else and I looked over at the officer for some sort of explanation. Officer Stevens, his name was on his tag. This was the man who called me.

"Lucas Alexander was arrested for the murder of Camille Jenks. I believe she was known as Cammy?"

I stared at him.

"Uh, Luke killed Cammy?" I asked in disbelief. I didn't completely trust him with my woman, but a killer? Really?

"All the evidence points in that direction."

Okay, so Luke was arrested. That didn't explain why my girl was so completely distraught.

"Baby, I don't understand."

She started mumbling against my chest. I didn't understand much, but I did understand two words 'gun' and 'head'.

"Gun? Who had a fucking gun? Luke?" I could feel my heart pounding in my chest like a fucking steel drum at just the thought. I would go to the jail and kill the motherfucker with my bare hands.

Bella shook her head, but didn't say anything else. I looked back up at Officer Stevens.

"She wasn't supposed to be here," he said flatly. "When we make an arrest, we have to take every precaution necessary to make sure that we don't get caught off guard."

_Every precaution? What exactly does that mean?_

"What the fuck did you do?" I snarled.

I felt Bella's grip on me tighten, her fingers digging into my skin even further. That shit would have hurt, but I was too pissed off to even register the pain.

"Motherfucker, tell me you did not point a gun at my girl."

"Watch yourself," he warned.

"Edward, it's not his fault. It's his job," she cried. "It just scared me."

I wanted to fuck him up, and if he weren't a cop, I probably would have; but Bella was right. He was just doing his job. I couldn't fault him for that no matter how much I wanted to.

I closed my eyes, rubbing my cheek against the top of her head. "Are we done here? Do you guys need anything else from her or can I take her home?"

"Take her home," he nodded.

Bella let go of me and reached down to grab her bag. She looked at Luke's desk. "Can I take his computer?"

"No, our tech guys will need to go through it before it can be released."

"But. . ." Bella swallowed thickly. "I. . I'm going to need it for the presentation."

I wanted to laugh at her, but I had a feeling she was simply trying to hold her shit together by focusing on what still had to be done, regardless of the situation with Luke.

Officer Stevens sighed and handed Bella a card. "Call me tomorrow and I'll see what I can do. They might be able to transfer what you need onto a flash drive."

"I thought you had everything on your drive?" I asked.

"Except the PowerPoint presentation. I just need the presentation."

She was completely in a daze; on autopilot. I couldn't help but wonder when it would break. Hopefully not in the car.

Charlie didn't have school on Tuesdays so he was at home with my mother. I got Bella situated in the passenger seat and called my mom.

"Hello, sweetheart, how is your day going so far?"

"Hi, mom, uh, not so good. Bella's boss got arrested."

"What?" Mom's voice was suddenly several octaves higher than usual.

"Yeah, it's a long story, but Bella's not in a good place. We're coming home, but can you hold onto Charlie."

"Of course I will, Edward. Is Bella okay? Is there anything you need?"

"No, mom, thank you. Just keep a hold of him. I'll come get him in a bit and explain."

"Take as long as you need, sweetheart."

"Thanks, ma."

I hung up the phone and climbed in behind the wheel.

The car ride was uncomfortable; physically, it was uncomfortable. Bella's grip on my hand was painful. I'm pretty sure that if she could have been on my lap, she would have been. She didn't say anything, just stared, and squeezed.

_God Damn, she's squeezing really fucking hard._

"Bella, baby?"

She looked at me silently.

"My hand, baby. You're crushing my hand."

"Sorry," she whispered flatly, instantly loosening her grip enough to make it stop hurting. "We should get Charlie."

"My mom's gonna keep him for the afternoon so we can decompress a little," I explained.

"She doesn't need to do that. If we're home, he should be with us."

I glanced over at her. "You really want Charlie to see you like this?"

"Like what?" she asked defensively.

"Baby," I said, taking a deep breath. "I get that you want to be strong and pretend that nothing happened in there, but you had a gun pointed at you. Give yourself a couple of hours to deal with that before going back to being super-mommy, okay?"

I could see her staring at me in my periphery, several emotions flitting across her face before she turned away and looked back out the window.

When we pulled up to the house I ran around the other side of the car and opened the door, grabbing her hand and pulling her to the apartment before she could even think about going to the main house.

She didn't fight me. I ushered her up the stairs in front of me and used my keys to open the door as she waited.

We got inside and I went to lock the door. When I turned back around, Bella was on me. Her arms wrapped around my neck, hands in my hair, pulling and pushing me closer to her. Her lips crashed against mine, teeth, tongue, Bella.

"Edward," she begged. "I need you."

Her voice was so desperate, so lost. I couldn't deny her. I could never deny her. Anything she wanted, I would give and right now, she wanted my body to consume hers.

I wanted her too. The idea that anything could have threatened her made me crazy with need.

(~~~)

I didn't hesitate. I pulled her sweater up over her head and unsnapped her bra so fast you'd think I'd ripped the sucker off. My hands cupped her and she moaned when my thumbs brushed over her already hardened nipples.

"Fuck, Bella," I grunted when her hand gripped my dick through my scrubs.

"Yes. Please fuck Bella," she said urgently, pushing my shirt up.

Once I was shirtless, she went in for the kill, kissing, licking, sucking and biting. We hadn't even got out of the fucking foyer yet.

I slid my hands down her back, over her ass, and rested them on the back of her thighs before picking her up. I heard her shoes hit the ground and slipped out of mine as fast as I could. She didn't let up on me as I walked us to the bedroom, tripping on something and nearly killing both of us on the way. My hand landed flat against the wall and Bella's legs had to tighten themselves around my waist so that she didn't fall, but not once did her mouth leave my body.

By the time I made it to the bedroom, she was frantic. I crashed into the new dresser and set her ass down on top of it. She let go of me and lifted her hips as I stripped her of her pants and panties. I didn't even get to see what she was wearing, only that they were red and looked like they might have lace on them. Within seconds, my pants were pushed down to my thighs, my dick sprang free and I slammed into my girl so hard her head hit the wall behind her.

"Fuck, baby, I'm sorry, are you okay?" I cringed, pulling out of her slightly.

"Yeah, don't stop, just go, go." Her heels dug into my ass in encouragement and I ploughed back into her. She let her hands slip down to the edge of the dresser, bracing herself against my thrusts.

I grabbed the back of her knees and pulled her all the way to the edge.

"Fuck, you feel so good," I groaned. "You always feel so fucking good."

"Harder, Edward, God, go harder."

I didn't think I could go harder without hurting her and I swore I'd never hurt her again. As it was, I wasn't sure that she wouldn't have any marks. Even the dresser was slamming against the wall with the force I was putting into it.

I looked down and watched myself sliding in and out of her.

"Fuck that's hot."

Bella's tongue darted out, wetting her lower lip. I wanted to fucking taste those lips. I was just about to do it too, but her hand distracted me. I watched as it slid downwards towards where I was still rapidly pumping in and out of her.

Her eyes were dark when she met my gaze, like she was possessed. It was a little bit fucking scary. And then she wrapped her thumb, index, and middle finger around my cock adding pressure every time it slid from her pussy.

"Ung," I grunted. "You can't do that if you want me last."

"I want you to cum on my tits," she mewled.

_Um. . . say again?_

"Should we get your ears checked?" she asked in a sarcastic pant.

Shit, I'd said that out loud. Manic fucking apparently took away my ability to talk to myself in my head.

"Mmmm, Edward, stop thinking, just fuck me."

I looked up at her again and she was smirking at me.

"You want me to fucking cum on your tits?"

She nodded.

I sped up. She still had her hand between us and it was fucking killing me. I felt myself growing harder and swelling. I was gonna burst, but not before she did.

"Move your hand," I demanded.

"Not until you're ready to cum."

"Move. Your. Fucking. Hand." I growled.

She finally relented and my thumb went right to her clit, rubbing circles and pinching gently.

"Oh, Ahhhhhh. Fuck, Edward. I'm gonna . . . ."

Her hands flailed a little, knocking a few things off the dresser before she finally found purchase on the edge again. I felt her pussy grip me as she cried out a whole slew of profanities; her head falling backwards and her eyes rolling back into her head.

I grimaced, forcing myself to hold back until she had ridden out her orgasm. But the moment she started to relax I pulled out, wrapping my hand around my extremely swollen cock and pumping as I came all over her.

She jumped a little at first impact, her eyes snapping open, but she watched with great pleasure as I continued to unload everything I had.

She had this sexy little smirk on her face when our eyes finally met.

"Is this what you wanted?" I grunted.

She looked back down to her front. My cum covered her belly button, her ribs, her breasts and dripped from the peaks of her nipples. She lifted her finger and swiped it over one of the still tight little buds. I watched her tongue swirl around before she sucked it into her mouth and moaned.

"Bella," I warned. Forget about recovery time, I hadn't even gone limp yet.

"Wanna take a shower," she purred. "I'm feeling kinda dirty."

_Fuuuuuuuuuuck._

She didn't wait for me to answer. She pushed me backwards a little, just enough to slip down off the dresser and then sauntered her gorgeous, naked ass into the bathroom. Just before she disappeared through the door she turned to look at me over her shoulder.

"Are you coming?" she asked, biting her lip. The double entendre was definitely intended.

I felt like getting down on my knees and thanking God for giving me this woman. Not only was she smart, and loving, and an amazing fucking mother to my son, but she was my sexual soul mate. Oh who the fuck was I kidding? She was my soul mate in every way.

A part of me recognized that this was her way of forgetting the turmoil of the last few days, but I was okay with that. I would take her where she needed to go for as long as humanly possible.

And so I did. I'm not sure if I felt dirtier going into the shower or coming out of it. First there were Bella's tits covered in me, then there were Bella's tits all soapy and sudsy and slippery. I couldn't help myself. She practically offered them up to my dick on a silver platter. She was sitting down on the shower bench and I thought I was going to get a blowjob. She looked up at me, batting those long dark lashes of hers as I dragged the head of my cock up and down between her breasts, ready for whenever she planned to take it in her mouth. She grinned wickedly and curled her shoulders forward, pressing them together with her arms, surrounding me with slick plump flesh. I paused what I was doing just long enough to understand. I cocked an eyebrow at her.

"Getting a little adventurous are we, love?"

"You make me want to try new things," she purred as I began thrusting myself at an agonizingly slow pace.

I'd seen it in porn movies, but God damn, my cock between her tits was one of the sexiest fucking things ever. I wanted to take a fucking picture. And the sensation was almost more than I could handle, the soap making me slip back and forth with ease.

Bella leaned back a little, resting her head against the wall. I straddled her so that I could get some leverage to go faster. We were both watching the sight as I started to titty fuck the shit out of her. Her body shook every time I pushed forward. Her nipples were peaked and my fingertips were drawn to them. She let out this little whimpered moan when I brushed my thumbs over them., pinching them gently.

One of her hands was resting on the back of my thigh while the other was somewhere else. From the look on her face and her slightly opened mouth, I assumed it was in the vicinity of her pussy.

_Next time I'm filming this shit so I can see everything!_

"Are you fingering yourself?" I asked smugly.

"Yes," she squeaked. "Ah, ah, ah," she cried out, her back arching, pressing her tits and with them, my dick into a new position.

I felt the hand that had been pleasuring herself with cup my balls, squeezing firmly, and I was done.

"Bella, I'm gonna cum," I grunted. I started to pull away hating that I had to leave such a perfect place, but she stopped me by grabbing my ass and leaning her head forward, her tongue darting out to flick at the tip.

It was at that moment that I wondered if I was fucking dreaming. This shit just doesn't happen. But fuck, if it was a dream I was gonna make the most of it.

"In your mouth?"

"Yes, please." She smirked up at me, knowing that she was shocking the shit out of me.

I slid my dick back between her tits in three hard, fast thrusts before I exploded straight into her waiting mouth.

"Fucking Christ, what are you doing to me?" I said under my breath, the aftershocks of my orgasm making my whole body twitch.

If I had thought the woman was done with me, I was so, so wrong. She was absolutely insatiable.

"Baby, you're gonna kill me," I practically whimpered as she bounced off my dick nearly an hour later. We were both covered in a sheen of sweat. I could see beads trickling down the sides of her neck, next to the little curls that hung at the nape.

"You want me to stop?" she asked incredulously, slowing her movements.

I gripped her hips urging her to keep going. "Fuck, no, don't stop. Never, stop." I whispered the last part to myself.

As much as I loved being inside of my girl; couldn't get enough of her, I was getting really fucking tired. And hungry. She had completely worn me out.

_How is that even fucking possible?_

Bella's rocking sped up, her hands pressed firmly against my chest, and her fingers curled making her fingernails dig into my flesh.

"Can you get there one more time?" she asked in a hoarse whisper.

Could I? I'm sure I could, with her tight little body hovered over mine, her eyes pleading 'just one more time'. I felt a surge of blood flow straight down as I sat up, latching my mouth onto her neck and bucking up into her.

I bit into her skin gently as I came, feeling her tense with her own release.

She rolled off of me and fell back onto the bed.

"Oh my God," she groaned.

I couldn't fucking move. I just lay there, completely exposed, my dick finally flaccid.

(~~~)

"I think I'm broken," I said, letting out an almost painful chuckle.

She started laughing. "I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for, love?" I turned over onto my side so I could face her.

She was still laughing. "For taking advantage of you. I just. . . . I just. . ."

"Never apologize for that," I scoffed. "That's what I'm here for."

Bella turned her head to look at me. "You're here for me to fuck your brains out when I can't deal?"

I nodded and flashed her my crooked smile. "Did it work?"

She smiled and nodded. "It helped."

"It helped me too."

She bit her lip and frowned. "Now you're making me feel bad for getting all grumpy on you yesterday morning."

"Don't feel bad, baby," I soothed. "I'd rather you tell me '_no_' than not enjoy it."

"It's not that I wouldn't have enjoyed it. I was just tired and grumpy. Not in the right frame of mind for a morning romp," she smiled, her eyes asking me to understand. Of course I understood. Well, sort of. I was always in the right frame of mind for a morning romp, but whatever.

I cupped her cheek with my hand and leaned it to kiss her forehead. "Seriously, Bella. Are you okay?"

Her eyes glazed over with moisture. "That was one of the scariest fucking things I've ever gone through," she said softly. "I kept thinking that at least Charlie had you. I mean, rationally I didn't think they wouldn't actually shoot me, but what if someone got a little trigger happy? It happens in movies all the time."

"I'm sorry you had to be there for that, baby. I'm guessing your dad had no idea that shit was going down today?"

"I don't think so. Detective Laurent said that they purposely told him that Luke was in the clear so that I didn't accidentally give anything away."

"That's stupid."

Bella shrugged. "I like Luke."

I didn't say anything. She already knew that I was not his biggest fan, especially after she caught him staring at her tits, but the dude didn't deserve what Cammy had done to him either.

Bella snorted. "He had actually just told me that he thought everything was going to be just fine; right before they busted through the door with weapons drawn."

"Maybe he didn't do it," I offered.

Bella shook her head. "He _looked_ guilty, Edward. He didn't even try to fight it."

"Maybe it was an accident."

I was grasping at straws. There were a lot of people who had a reason to want to kill the bitch if she was really trying to destroy their families. But all that evidence was destroyed. Luke was the only real connection that could be traced other than me. Fucking idiot. Of course I had no place to talk.

Bella looked at me hopefully. "Yeah, maybe. Do you think that can be used as a defense?"

"I'm not a lawyer, baby. I would think so, but I don't know. Let's hope he has a good defense attorney. What are you going to do about the presentation?"

"I'm going to ask our funders if I can do it by myself, I guess."

"You really want to do that?" I asked raising my eyebrows in surprise.

"I've worked my ass off for four months, of course I want to do it," she snapped.

"Okay. I was just asking."

She sighed. "I'm sorry, Edward, I'm just frustrated. . . and frazzled."

"I gathered."

We both stopped talking as I stroked Bella's arm with my fingertips. I let them trace downwards over her hips and stopped when I saw the faint discoloration from where I had gripped her while slamming into the dresser. I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth.

"Don't," she whispered, her hand covering mine.

"Bella. . .I"

"It's not the same and you know it."

"I don't care, I was too rough."

"I needed it like that," she soothed. "You did exactly what I wanted. I like the gentle, passionate love making, but goddammit, Edward. I needed to be fucked hard. I've got bruises all over my body from simply walking into things. These. . ." she used both of our hands to trace over what would certainly become angry purple bruises. "These just remind me of how passionate we are."

"I love you so fucking much, Bella. I can't stand the thought of hurting you.

She smiled. "I love you too. You didn't hurt me."

The room was silent except for our breathing. Until my stomach growled loudly.

Bella smiled. "Do you want to go get Charlie and get some lunch?"

I looked at my watch. "It's already one, baby; my mom's probably already fed him. Do you want to go out though?"

She nodded and stood up, wincing and putting her hand flat against her pussy.

"Ouch," she yelped almost silently.

"A little sore there?"

"Yes," she squeaked.

"Want me to massage it for you?" I laughed.

She picked up a pillow from the end of the bed and threw it at me before waddling her way to the bathroom. I watched her ass and then lay back on the bed putting the pillow over my face.

Once we were dressed, I called my mom. Charlie was indeed fed and lying in my parent's bed waiting for a nap time story.

"Is everything okay?" Mom asked.

"Um, yes and no. We're going to go grab some lunch and then we'll come home and explain."

"Alright, sweetheart. I love you."

"Love you too, ma."

The diner was actually pretty busy for being after the typical lunch hour. Bella and I grabbed the first available booth right in the middle. She rested her hands on the table and I threaded my fingers through hers, bringing her knuckles to my lips and kissing them softly.

Despite her attempt to pull herself together, she still looked freshly fucked and I was pretty sure I did too. I hadn't even bothered to try and tame my hair before heading out.

Bella confirmed my thoughts. "You've got sex hair," she giggled.

"You do too," I smirked.

"What? I do not, I brushed it."

She tried to pull her hands away from me, but I wouldn't let go. "I like it that way. You look extremely sexy." I winked at her.

A shadow loomed over the table and both Bella and I were greeted by none other than Mike Newton. The expression on his face made him look constipated. Either he was extremely uncomfortable or he really was constipated.

"What can I get for you?" he asked flatly.

"When did you start working here?" Bella asked, without answering his question.

"Last week. The company I was working in Seattle filed for Chapter 11 and I lost my job," he grumbled.

He was staring at our joined hands and it suddenly crossed my mind that this was the fucker who spread rumors about taking Bella's virginity.

She either sensed my sudden rage or read the expression on my face, because I felt her grip tighten on me.

"Two waters right now, please, Mike," she scrambled. "Like, right now."

His eyes flickered to her and then to me. I watched as they widened. Motherfucker was catching on.

He quickly disappeared and before I knew it, Bella was no longer across from me, but next to me.

"Edward, calm down," she soothed, her hand rubbing my thigh.

"I'm gonna kill that motherfucker," I growled.

"No you're not. I should be the one getting all pissed off. It's me he lied about."

"Bella, you have no idea what it did to me when he said that about you. And you weren't even my girl back then. Right now, I'm thinking he needs to be taught a lesson."

She leaned back and tilted her head. "Are you jealous?"

"Of what?" I scoffed. "I'm the one who gets to touch you." I grabbed the back of her neck and pulled her close, gently placing a kiss on her jaw. "To taste you," I dragged my tongue up to her ear. "To feel your naked body against mine. Every. Single. Night." I sucked her earlobe into my mouth and bit down, causing her to whimper as though we hadn't just spent the last few hours fucking each other silly.

I smirked as two waters were set down in front of us.

Bella startled and pulled back. I could see the tips of her ears turn bright red before the blush slipped down, blanketing her cheeks and neck.

"Are you ready to order?" Mike asked, refusing to make eye contact with either of us.

_That's right, douchbag. Know your place._

Bella cleared her throat. "Can I get a grilled chicken sandwich with no mayo, please?"

Mike nodded. I was silent. Bella looked over at me and furrowed her brow. I didn't look at her. I kept my eyes on Mike, waiting.

After a couple of minutes he finally gave in and made eye contact with me. "Well, Mike." I sneered. "First of all, I'd like for you to apologize to Bella."

"Edward," Bella sighed.

"For what?" Mike asked. His mouth said one thing, but his face told a whole different story. He knew exactly what I was talking about. I knew what guilty defiance looked like.

Bella's head snapped up. "What do you mean for what?" she asked, her voice a little higher than usual.

"I didn't do anything."

I went to stand and Mike stepped away from the table. Bella gripped onto my arm and pulled me back down.

"You know what, forget it," she huffed. "I don't need your sorry ass apology. Just bring me my fucking chicken sandwich."

"And a cheeseburger with extra cheese."

He stared at us, his jaw tight as if he wanted to say something.

"And if I find that our food has been. . . . disturbed in any way," I warned.

He swallowed and shook his head, indicating that he understood.

The rest of lunch was uneventful. Mike, however, clocked out before we were finished, leaving another waitress to take care of us. I made sure that she would be receiving the tip and not him before handing her a fifty to pay for our twenty dollar meal.

When we got back to the house, Charlie was still asleep. Carlisle had just gotten off shift and was sprawled out on the sofa in the living room with his arm over his face and his feet in my mom's lap. She had her laptop resting on his shins and was typing furiously.

When we walked into the room, she looked up. I could see she was itching to ask Bella if everything was okay, but she didn't. She set her laptop on the coffee table and moved Carlisle's feet so she could stand up. Carlisle grunted softly and opened his eyes, focusing on us.

"Hey, what happened?" he asked in an exhausted voice as he sat up.

Bella blew out a puff of air. I didn't want her to have to go through it again so I asked her to go make some coffee. She squeezed me thankfully and disappeared into the kitchen.

"Bella's boss got arrested for Cammy's murder this morning. The cops didn't realize she would be there and pulled a gun on her."

"What?" Carlisle yelled.

"Oh, my dear lord," Mom gasped.

"She's dealing, so just, don't say anything about it. If she wants to talk about it, she will."

My parents nodded and when Bella came back into the room with a tray of coffee filled mugs, we all sat down. Carlisle told us about some administrative controversy and mom told us about this remodel project on a twenty million dollar house overlooking Puget Sound that she was bidding on.

Not too long after that, Charlie made his way down the stairs and curled up into Bella's lap. I watched her carefully as she buried her nose in his hair and held onto him tightly. Her eyes glazed over a few times, causing her to close them, but when she opened them again, all hints of sadness were gone and she smiled with the rest of us as Carlisle made Charlie laugh hysterically by tickling his ribs. I pulled my phone out and made a recording just so I could set that as the ringtone for whenever I got a call from home. Best. Sound. Ever. Well, almost the best sound. Bella made some pretty fantastic sounds herself.

Before we made our way back to the apartment, Carlisle took Bella into his office.

"What was that all about?" I asked, once we got outside.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out two pills. "Ambien. He wants me to sleep," she whispered.

"Oh. Yeah, that'd probably be good."

"Said that I was looking a little pale."

"You're always pale," I laughed. "We live in Washington and it's winter."

She bumped my shoulder with hers, pushing me away playfully. I wrapped my arm around her, rubbing her shoulder and pulling her close.

After dinner, I watched as Bella took the pill and then went back to get into her pajamas. After twenty minutes I peeked in and saw her lying in bed. I couldn't tell if she was actually sleeping or not, but didn't want to disturb her just in case.

Chief Swan called shortly after. He was livid. I could practically feel the phone melting as I spoke to him. He was really fucking pissed off.

"She's okay," I assured. "My dad gave her an Ambien to help her sleep so she's in bed."

"Okay?" he seethed. "How on Earth is she okay, Edward?"

How do I tell the Chief that I let his daughter fuck me raw all afternoon to ensure that she released as much pent up emotion as possible?

"Trust me, Chief. We've been working through it all afternoon. She's tough."

"I know she's tough, son," he said, thankfully not reading too far into my explanation. "But I've seen cops who break down after having a gun pulled on them, just keep an eye on her is all I'm saying."

"You know I will."

I heard him take a deep breath. "Yes, I do. I'm glad that she has you," he said quietly.

Hold up. Did he just say what I think he did?

"You are?"

He chuckled. "Yes, Edward, I am. But if you tell anyone I said it, I'll firmly deny it."

Wow.

"Uh, thanks, Chief," I stuttered a little.

Well how the hell did that happen? Chief Swan had been first in line to bury my ass a few months ago and now he was. . . supporting me?

"Have her call me in the morning. She still needs to come in and look at some photos."

I wrinkled my nose. "Can't she do it next week?"

"No. I don't want to take any chances. The sooner we figure out who this guy is, the better."

I nodded unconsciously even though he couldn't see me.

Once I hung up the phone I went in to check on Charlie. He was sitting on his bedroom floor in nothing but his CARS underpants.

"What are you doing, buddy?" I asked.

"Reading," he said very matter-of-factly.

"Oh yeah?" I asked bending down to see that he did, in fact, have a book in his hands.

"Uh huh."

"Do you think maybe you can get in your pajamas and then I can read with you?"

He rubbed his eyes and stood up without saying a word. He pulled out a pair of mismatched PJs and stripped down.

"Brush your teeth and go pee. I'll wait for you here."

"K, daddy," he sighed heavily.

About three minutes later, just as I was getting myself comfortable in the bean bag, he reappeared and I knew that there was no way that his teeth had actually gotten clean. I didn't, however, bother sending him back to do it properly. I was too fucking tired from my afternoon of. . . .well, of fucking, and Charlie looked like he might not last past a few pages. So I opened my arms and welcomed him as he snuggled down beside me.

I started reading, but didn't get very far before Charlie looked up at me.

"Mommy doesn't feew good," he said quietly.

"No, mommy doesn't feel good," I agreed.

"Does she have an owie?" He bit his lip, looking somewhat distressed.

"No, buddy, mommy's just tired. She had a bad day." I brushed some rogue hairs from his forehead. Sometimes, when I looked at him like this, I was still amazed at how much he really did look like me. His eyes were the exact same shade of green, his hair identical, right down to the texture.

"Can she be better tomorrow?"

I smiled down at him. "I hope so. But don't you worry about it, okay?" I poked my finger at his nose. "I'll take care of mommy."

He nodded and looked back at the book, waiting for me to continue. Within a few minutes, he was fast asleep, slumped against my chest. I lifted him into his bed, kissed his temple, and went to look in on my girl.

It was still early, but she was fast asleep, probably thanks to the Ambien.

I stripped out of my clothes and threw on a pair of pajama pants. I could have stayed up and putzed around for a while, but I was exhausted and I could probably do with a good night's sleep. After brushing my teeth I climbed into bed, careful not to make too much noise.

Bella shifted and, almost like a magnet, her back found my chest and my arm draped itself over her waist. I kissed her just below her ear and she mumbled something that sounded like "Edward, get the chickens out of the hot tub."

I chuckled. "I'll do that, baby."

XXXXXXXX

I had to go into work the rest of the week. I didn't want to, but Bella insisted. With me getting ready to take nearly a month off, it was probably best that I sucked it up.

She drove me to Port Angeles on Wednesday. Charlie had school and Bella had an appointment. She also needed to go into the Sheriff's station to see if she could get her hands on the PowerPoint that she and Luke were supposed to be presenting the next week. I didn't know how she was going to handle that, but I had faith that she could.

"How'd it go?" I asked when she picked me up at the end of the day.

Bella shrugged. "Fine."

"Your appointment?"

"The nurse practitioner thinks I'm anemic. She confirmed what your dad said; too much stress and not taking care of myself like I should be. I got sent to the lab and they did some blood work. It should be back in a few days."

"You should be taking an iron supplement; you don't eat enough red meat or greens. Maybe a multivitamin."

She nodded. "Is this what I have to look forward to the rest of my life? You giving me tips on how to take care of my health, Dr. Cullen."

She wanted to play this game, I could play too.

"Why yes, Mrs. Cullen, you do," I teased. If she was going to use my future name, I was going to use hers. "I love you and I want you around for a long time so if lecturing you about not taking care of yourself is what I need to do, it's what I will do."

I looked at her and saw her lips twitch a little, but I wasn't sure if it was meant to be a smile or a frown.

"Did the Sheriff's office give you what you need?"

She reached around her neck and pulled out a lanyard. Attached to it was her flash drive. "Yup. I called the school too."

"And?"

"I spoke to Dr. Stalworth. She's the head of the Psych Department. I explained what had happened. She was upset, but she said that she would speak with her colleagues. She didn't want to see all the work that we did completely discredited."

"Well that's good isn't it?"

"Yes, I hope so. She's supposed to call me tomorrow."

"Your dad wants us to stop by the station on our way home."

Bella groaned. I reached for her hand. "I know, baby, but let's just get it over with."

I pulled into the station just as the sun was setting. Chief Swan was at his desk.

"Hi, Grampa," Charlie yelled from across the room.

"Charlie, don't shout," Bella shushed. Chief Swan opened his arms and welcomed his overenthusiastic grandson.

"Hi, Bella." A guy about her father's age, but a little rougher around the edges stepped up. He was shorter than me with a slight beer belly and a bald head.

"Hey, Leland," Bella smiled at him. "You ready to take a look at some photos?"

She wrinkled her nose. "Do I have a choice?"

I heard Chief Swan mumbling under his breath.

"It shouldn't take long, sweetheart," Leland assured, putting his hand on her upper back.

I raised my eyebrows at him and he chuckled.

Bella sat down in a chair and Leland handed her a stack of photos. I looked over her shoulder. She flipped through them quickly and then stopped.

"Uh, I think this is him," she said holding the photo out.

I looked at it. The guy had shoulder length blond hair, blue eyes and a light beard. He looked slightly familiar, but, of course, I had no idea why.

"You think?"

"Yeah, I mean, he didn't have long hair or a beard, but his face is the same. His eyes."

I watched as Leland looked over at the chief and nodded.

"Is that him? That's the guy who broke into our apartment?" I asked.

"That's the man whose DNA was found, yes. Now it's time to connect the dots," Leland said, taking the photos back and setting them on his desk.

"Is that it? Is that all you needed?" Bella asked, standing up.

"Yeah, Bells. Just remember what I said, okay? If you see him again, call me right away."

Bella rolled her eyes, but acquiesced nonetheless.

XXXXXXXX

I had never been so happy to see a Friday in my entire life. The week just needed to be fucking over. We had a few days to relax before my interview at UW and Bella's presentation, in which the funders unanimously agreed to let her do solo. Fuckers wanted their money's worth despite Luke's precarious situation. I guess I couldn't really blame them.

Luke had been arraigned, but bail had been set too high for his pay grade and he had been sent to the Clallam Bay Corrections Center. Bella wanted to go see him after the presentation, but the idea freaked me out. We agreed to disagree on the matter until after it was done.

As we passed by the center of town I noticed the annual Christmas tree being decorated at Tillicum Park. After dinner I couldn't help myself.

"Let's go get a Christmas tree."

"Right now?" Bella asked, looking at me like I was crazy.

"Yeah, why not?"

"Uh, because it's getting late. It's dark, it's cold."

"It's six o'clock, Bella. We can have a tree all picked up and back home before Charlie's bedtime. I can set it up tonight and we can decorate it tomorrow.

"I know, but this is your family's first Christmas with Charlie. Won't they want to do this together?"

"This is _my_ first Christmas with Charlie. . . and with you. I want it to just be the three of us."

The look on her face was almost ashamed, but I didn't want her to look like that. I grabbed her hand.

"Come on, let's go."

Bella smiled at me. "Your parents are going to kill us."

"No they won't. They'll understand. This is about us. Sometimes we need to focus on just you, me, and Charlie and not everyone else."

"I agree," she said, biting her lip. "But do you really think your mother is going to be okay with this?"

I sighed and enveloped Bella in my arms. "When are you going to get the picture?"

"Why don't you explain it to me," she said, her fingers toying with the collar on my shirt.

"You and Charlie are the most important people in my world. I love my parents, I love my siblings. But nothing," I grabbed her chin making sure she was looking directly into my eyes so she could see just how honest I was being. "Nothing, compares to the love I have for the two of you."

She reached up on her tippy toes and I felt her soft lips connect with my jaw. "That's not really fair you know," she pretended to pout.

"Why?"

"Because anything I say now will sound weak and Hallmark-like."

"So don't say anything," I responded pressing my lips against hers, effectively shutting her up.

She hummed against my mouth, "Okay, let's go."

XXXXX

The Christmas tree lot was fucking busy. I suppose that shouldn't have surprised me considering that it was three weeks before Christmas, but it did. Bella pulled in and parked her car, which we had driven because there was no way in hell I was tying a tree to the top of my Beamer.

I hadn't been there in years, but it was exactly the same. They took a field and turned it into a kid's Christmas fantasy. There were red, green, and white twinkling lights strung overhead; rows and rows of Christmas trees of all sizes, shapes and varieties. They had a reindeer petting zoo and in a small cabin, they had set up a little toy shop where everything was under five dollars. And, of course, right smack dab in the middle was the set-up for the jolly man himself.

"I have to pee," Bella said crossing her legs like she was five.

I looked down at her and laughed. "I think there's one in the toy shop," I pointed.

"Charlie, do you have to go?"

"No," he said, his attention anywhere but on his mother.

"He went right before we left," I explained when Bella looked skeptical.

"Okay, I'll be right back."

Bella disappeared through the throngs of people and I turned back to Charlie who had a death grip on my hand. His eyes were trained on the big fat bearded man.

"Who's dat, daddy?"

I bent down so that I was at his level. "That, son, is Santa Claus."

I smiled to myself and tried not to laugh. I sounded exactly like Carlisle.

Charlie's face looked unsure and he leaned into me. "I don't fink I wike him," he whispered.

"You don't?"

He shook his head.

"Why not?"

"He wooks scary."

I chuckled. "He's not supposed to be scary, buddy. He brings you presents."

Charlie turned his head. His face was so close to mine that my eyes nearly crossed, but I could see his expression.

"Presents?"

I nodded slowly.

"I wike presents."

I heard footsteps behind me and lifted my chin to find Bella looking down at us.

"I feel better," she sighed.

"Good." I stood up, feeling Charlie lean away from me, but just slightly.

"Have you never told him about Santa Claus?"

"Of course I have," she scoffed.

"He just asked me who that was."

"He was two last Christmas, Edward. I'm sure I have the photo in one of my boxes. I sat the child on that man's lap and watched him cry for the five minutes it took to get the picture."

"That's horrible."

"I know," she laughed.

"No wonder he's afraid of him."

"He's afraid of him?"

I nodded. "I think so. Charlie, do you want to sit on Santa's lap and tell him what you want for Christmas?"

Charlie shook his head 'no' furiously.

I looked back up at Bella. "Well I'm not going to force him," she shrugged. "Are you sure, baby?"

"Uh, huh," he said, watching as a little boy about a year old was pulled off of Santa's lap screaming and wailing.

We spent forty-five minutes looking at trees. This one was too tall, that one was too short. She didn't like the longer needles, but the short spiky ones hurt when you touched them. I indulged her completely, simply enjoying the fact that my son didn't seem to understand his mother's pickiness either. There were a few people around that we had gone to high school with or we had known since we were kids. They just couldn't help themselves and had to come over and say hello. It felt like they were fucking analyzing us.

I probably would have noticed the girls who were oohing and aahing all over me and Charlie if it hadn't been for all the assholes eyeballing Bella. She did look really fucking cute in a pair of skinny jeans, her calf high UGGS and bundled up in her winter coat. She had a wooly hat with a bobble on the top and ties hanging down and was wearing a pair of knit fingerless gloves.

_What the fuck is the point of fingerless gloves? Isn't that the part you're trying to keep warm?_

Her nose and cheeks were all pink and she smiled and laughed when she spoke to them. I wanted to shout 'Back off. She's mine, fuckers!' but I didn't think that would go over well so I just shot them a murderous glare and they made their exits pretty quickly.

After we found "THE PERFECT" tree, I paid the guy to strap it to the top of the car and Charlie and I made a quick trip to the toy store where I gave him a few bucks to buy a porcelain paint-your-own 'I love you, Mommy' ornament and a little hot wheels car, for him, not me.

Of course, on the way home, he had one of those rare mega tantrums, screaming that he wanted to see Santa.

"Of course," Bella mumbled as her hands gripped the wheel tighter. We both completely ignored him. Even though I really wanted to turn around and yell at him to knock it off, I didn't. The only thing I needed to do was make sure that he kept his seat belt clipped for the entire ten minute drive, which he did. I was getting better at dealing with these little episodes. I didn't get as freaked out as I used to. I still didn't like them, but at least I kept my own shit together.

The little guy was tired; we both knew it. Bella took him in and put him to bed while I sat down on the floor in front of the sofa and turned on the television, flipping through the channels mindlessly.

A few minutes later I was distracted by Bella's jean covered pussy as she stood in front of me with her legs on either side of my knees.

"Well, hello there," I grinned, not looking at her face at all.

She bent down on my lap straddling me. "Well, this is good too," I joked.

She made a face at me and stuck out her tongue.

"Are you offering that to me? Cause if you're not, I suggest you put it back in your own mouth before I take complete ownership."

She giggled and kissed me. Hard. Our noses pressed up against each other and she grinned as her lips played with mine.

Her hands were in my hair, scratching and pulling. Her hips began rocking and I was sucking furiously on her neck, just above her collarbone.

My mind drifted to all those douchebags who were eyefucking her and I sucked harder.

"Edward!" she screeched, pulling back and looking down, trying to see what I had done to her.

"I'm sorry," I laughed.

"Jesus Christ."

"It was an accident." I lifted up my hands in defense as she made to slap at me.

"No it wasn't, you ass."

"It was, I swear."

She pursed her lips together in disbelief and I took the opportunity to lean forward and press mine firmly to them.

"Do you forgive me?" I asked against her mouth.

"I thought you said it was an accident," she said, lifting her eyebrows.

"Mmmm. Yeah, I did say that, didn't I?" I pushed her backwards and climbed on top of her.

I heard a noise and looked up. "Oh shit!" I yelped, jerking my body backwards and falling to the side.

Bella's head twisted and she sat up quickly.

"Charlie, baby, what's the matter?"

Thank God we weren't fucking naked.

Charlie didn't say anything. He just stared at us. He was holding Ruffy in his hand and he let out a big yawn. "I'm not tired."

Bella righted her clothes and reached for him. "Come on, let's go back to your room and I'll read you another story okay?"

"We're not done," I warned with a grin as she walked away. She added an extra sway to her hips and disappeared down the hallway without looking back.

_Fuck._

I adjusted myself in my jeans and winced at just how fucking hard my girl made me. And I still had to bring in that stupid tree. I sighed, stood up and threw on my boots and coat.

I managed to get it off the roof of Bella's car, up the steps and into the apartment, but that was it. I couldn't be bothered to do anything else and we didn't even have a stand anyway. I left it in the foyer and made my way back to our bedroom.

When I got there my jaw dropped. Bella was laying buck naked on her stomach. Her feet were crossed at the ankles and dangling in the air. She appeared to be reading a book, but I knew better. I closed the door and turned the lock. She looked back over her shoulder and flashed me a coy smile.

"Charlie asleep?" I asked removing my shirt.

She nodded.

"Are you sure? Like, dead to the world asleep?" I flicked open the button on my jeans and let them slide down my legs before stepping out of them.

She nodded again.

I removed my boxers and watched her lick her lips as my raging erection was released.

"Good," I said, walking towards her. "Cause there's no way in hell you're gonna be able to keep quiet with what I'm about to do to you."

I covered her body with mine, pressed my chest against her back and my dick against her ass. As jealous as I could be, there was no way in hell that I doubted. Bella was mine.

BPOV

I held the envelope in my hand and bit my lip. I had been waiting for this. It had been months and I had almost forgotten. Edward had asked about it once or twice, but I didn't have anything to tell him. I didn't know.

I opened it carefully and pulled out the two copies of the paper within. The grin that spread across my face made my cheeks ache. I officially had my first Christmas present for Edward. I ran my fingers over the lettering of the new birth certificate.

_**CHARLES ANTHONY SWAN CULLEN**_

XXXXXXXX

**AN: See, I thought it was a bit fluffy, but there's other stuff too so I confused myself. LOL. **

**This is my style of writing. Life is not one big drama. It's ups and downs and all arounds. But next week you will get a few more answers. There are still a lot of things to be addressed, but they won't all come at once. I always thought it was annoying in crime shows when everything was supposed to be solved the same day as the crime. DNA tests and fingerprints come back instantly. And by the time the sun sets, they have a confession. Um, not gonna happen. I won't draw things out longer than they need to be, but everything needs time to be worked out. **

**I always debate whether or not to explain why I wrote things the way that I did; certain behaviors or responses that my characters have. You all are not in my head and I am not in yours so we may be on completely different planes. I'd like to, but at the same time I think that if you have questions, it's probably better to either ask in a review or PM me. That way I don't ramble about something in my ANs that may not have crossed anyone's minds. Make sense? **

**What do you think Edward will think of his Christmas gift? The Swan Cullen is not hyphenated, it has simply moved from being his surname to being a second middle name. **

**Reviews are lovely. You all have been very kind to me, so thank you. Also, if you have ideas for an outtake that you might want to see, please send it along. I have a few ideas myself, but I want to hear what you all want to read.**

**I can also be found on twitter: littlecat358 Or facebook, Littlecat Fanfiction.**


	31. Lives Intertwined

**AN: Hello, hello. **

**I'm wanting to thank everyone for your wonderful reviews and thoughts and theories. I sit back and watch the Twilighted thread light up and think "Wow, there really are some fantastic theories going on." So thank you ladies for keeping me entertained. :oD**

**To Mollie, who saved me this chapter. She does it every chapter, but this one in particular. LOL. Much love, darling. **

**To Mel, As usual, you give me the confidence to put my chapters up week after week. You don't complain when I e-mail you at 2 in the morning. You are indeed, my super-pre-reader. **

**Disclaimer as usual. On with the show. **

**XXXXXXXX**

Chapter 29: Lives Intertwined

BPOV

I slid the birth certificates back into the envelope, deciding that I'd hide it in our bedroom as soon as Edward was awake. I didn't want to take a chance on him discovering it before Christmas.

Charlie padded in, yawning and rubbing his eyes.

"Hi, mommy," he said tiredly as he climbed into my lap.

"Good morning, sweetie. Did you have a good sleep?"

"Uh huh."

"Do you want some breakfast?"

He nodded and rested his head against my chest. I took the moment to bury my nose in his hair and inhale. My little boy. I closed my eyes, holding him close. Things had changed so much for us in the last six months. We went from living in a one-bedroom apartment in Seattle with few friends and even fewer family, to sharing a bed at my father's house, to this. Edward was not only a part of our lives, but he was at the center of it; as a father and as a partner. We were surrounded by family who loved us and cherished us. We had a future. A future that I could have never imagined.

I must have been holding on too long, because Charlie started to squirm. If I could have held him there all morning, breathing him in, I would have. But he wasn't having any of it. He slid out of my arms and out of the room.

Taking a deep breath, I got up to make breakfast. I left the pile of mail and bills that had accumulated during the week on the table; stealing the envelope with the birth certificates and sliding it between two cookbooks where it couldn't be seen.

When Edward finally dragged himself out of bed, Charlie and I were sitting down eating.

"Morning," he grunted.

I tilted my head back so that he could press his lips against mine. They were warm and tasted of mint toothpaste. I squeaked when he bit down gently on my lower lip and was rewarded by a crooked grin when he pulled back. The man could make all of my bits tingle with very little effort.

"Good morning, buddy," he said running his hand through Charlie's hair.

"Hi, daddy," Charlie said with a mouthful of eggs.

Edward chuckled.

"Coffee's made and there's eggs and bacon in the oven."

"Thanks, baby."

When Edward came back in with a plate and mug, he sat down next to me. "What's all that?"

I wrinkled my nose. "Bills."

"Which ones?"

"Most of them."

Edward raised his eyebrows at me, silently calling me a smart ass.

He reached for them, but my hand darted out to stop him.

"What?"

"They're not all household bills, Edward."

"So."

I huffed. "I don't want you to see how much I owe."

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

I was getting tired of this one and two word conversation.

"Because they're my responsibility and there's no reason for you to worry about them."

Edward just stared at me. I tried to go back to eating my breakfast, but my eggs were now cold. Instead I pushed them around on my plate.

"Bella?"

I didn't answer him.

"Bella, this is ridiculous. I haven't paid a single bill since living here which means that you've been paying them all."

I pursed my lips. I was hoping that this wouldn't come up. I probably should have hidden the bills before he woke.

"I haven't even gotten my cell phone bill," he said narrowing his eyes.

_Uh oh!_

He looked over at our son, who was driving a car along the grain lines of the table, but his head was tilted, telling us that he was listening to us.

"Charlie, buddy, why don't you go get yourself dressed."

Charlie didn't say a word. He just slipped slowly from his chair, zooming his car through the air.

Once he was out of sight Edward turned an angry eye on me.

"You've been paying my fucking bills?" he whisper-yelled.

"It's not like you have that many of them."

"That's not the point," he growled. "Have you been paying them?"

I rolled my eyes. "I don't pay rent and I haven't helped your mother in months. How else am I supposed to feel like I'm not taking advantage?"

"You're fucking family, Bella. You don't have to pay rent. I don't pay rent either." He pinched the bridge of his nose, a sure sign that he was getting increasingly agitated. "Where are you getting the money to pay? You weren't making that much working. What other bills are there?" He grabbed the pile before I could stop him.

"Phone, cable, my credit card?" He held out his statement.

"I haven't paid that one."

"But you were going to." It wasn't a question, so I didn't answer him. Instead I looked away.

"You don't have to pay for my shit, Bella."

"I know I don't."

He looked through the rest of them which included my own credit card as well as my student loans and my car payment.

Edward let out a groan. "We're getting a joint account."

"Uh, no, I don't think so," I snorted.

_So not going to happen!_

"Don't be so difficult Bella. It'll be for household shit, okay? I'll put enough in to cover everything for the apartment, plus groceries and anything that Charlie needs."

"Edward," I groaned, rolling my head back onto my shoulders.

"This isn't up for discussion anymore. I get that you want to be independent and that's fine, but this is bullshit and you know it. We are in a committed relationship. We share a child, we share an apartment, we're going to share expenses. If you want to contribute, contribute, but for God's sakes, please let me take care of my family."

"I'm not going to sit back and let people accuse me of being after your money."

Edward let out a puff of air. "Is that what you're worried about?"

I nodded. "I am so tired of being the target of everyone's gossip."

"_Poor Bella was barely making ends meet and now she's managed to suck Edward into taking care of her_," I mocked in a higher than usual voice.

Edward's expression was a mixture of confusion and anger.

"Nobody thinks that," he protested

"You thought it." I said it so quietly I wasn't sure he heard me. He did.

"That's not fair," he said sadly, his face looking like I'd just punched him in the gut. "I had just gotten the biggest shock of my entire life. I was angry and irrational. I didn't think about anything I was saying at the time. I didn't really believe it then and you know I don't believe it now." He stared directly into my eyes. "Right?"

I nodded. I knew he wasn't concerned about my financial intentions. But that didn't mean other people weren't out there spreading rumors. Gossip spread like wildfire in Forks and all it would take is one jealous bitch to light the match.

Edward must have read my mind.

"Who gives a shit what they think, Bella? I know the truth, you know the truth; everyone that matters, knows the truth."

He wrapped his large hands around mine. "What we do financially is our business and our business only. It's not like you're dripping in diamonds and wearing fancy clothes. We live over my parents garage and shop at Wal-Mart and Costco for God's sake."

"That's because there's nowhere else to shop around here," I mumbled petulantly.

"Regardless," he said pointedly. "You and Charlie are just going to have to get used to having access to enough money to make you comfortable. I'm not asking you to let me buy you a house overlooking Puget Sound. I'm asking you to let me make life a little bit easier for all of us"

I could have argued out of pure stubbornness, but it wouldn't have gotten me anywhere. I knew that look on his face and if I pushed it, he would end up paying off my bills all on his own just because he could.

"Fine," I acquiesced.

"Fine," he sighed. "We'll go over to the bank this morning and set it up."

"What about the tree?"

"We'll go the bank and then we can go drive up to the Wal-Mart in P.A. and get a stand and some decorations."

_Well I guess he has everything planned out. Jerk._

I didn't mean to be so antagonistic, but it was hard. I had taken care of myself and Charlie for years and I wasn't used to letting anyone else do it for me. I wasn't just wary of the gossip, I was afraid of losing myself.

"I'm gonna go take a shower then if we're going out."

I picked up my plate and went to leave, but Edward grabbed my hand. I turned to face him, looking into his gorgeous emerald eyes as he brought my wrist to his lips and kissed me gently, never diverting his gaze.

"I love you, Bella."

I felt my lips twitching involuntarily and I gave in. "I love you too," I smiled.

XXXXXX

Setting up the account had been fairly easy. We left Charlie with Esme, telling her we'd pick him up before we headed to Port Angeles. He was thrilled because she immediately took him into the piano room to practice. He was getting really good. He could already play several songs including the theme song from Star Wars. That was his favorite.

The bank was quiet, as it usually is on Saturday mornings. There were two tellers, one of whom doubled as a personal banker. We opened the account and Edward transferred an ungodly amount of money into it from his personal account.

I knew that he'd inherited a large chunk of money when Edward Sr. died. Alice had told me all about it when we were in high school. Some sort of insurance policy worth millions. It was distributed between the three kids in separate trust funds that matured when they hit twenty-one. And Esme inherited a bit as well in an account that she refused to touch.

"You put too much in there," I grumbled as we walked back to the car.

"Arg. You are driving me insane, woman. Don't worry about the fucking money, please!"

I gritted my teeth and huffed.

"I'm not asking you to spend it all, Bella. I just want it to be available to you if you need it. Christ."

We didn't talk about it anymore after that. We picked up Charlie and drove to Port Angeles in virtual silence. Well, Edward and I were virtually silent, Charlie talked the whole way. It's not that I was mad, I was just frustrated and I didn't want to argue anymore. Edward snuck a sideways glance at me and chuckled as Charlie said something about how his friend Logan got in trouble for looking up Chrissy's skirt.

I smiled back. This was a good day.

We spent well over an hour picking out decorations for the tree. Neither one of us had any so we needed pretty much everything. We got Charlie some new clothes as well since he was beginning to outgrow his 3Ts, and a pair of new winter boots.

When we were finished, Edward paid. I didn't complain simply so that I could show him that I was going to try and be a little less stubborn.

"That wasn't so bad now, was it?" he joked, nudging me with his shoulder.

I pursed my lips. He was so not funny.

As we were walking out of the store I heard a motorcycle engine gunning and I looked over to find the source. I froze.

Was it him? The guy that had been following me? I hadn't seen him in a while and I couldn't really see his face. There was girl on the back of the motorcycle. I couldn't see her face at all either since it was turned away from me and buried into the back of his leather coat. They were too far for me to really be sure of anything. I watched as they pulled away, her arms wrapped tightly around him, blond hair blowing in the wind.

"Idiots," Edward mumbled.

"What?" I gasped.

He nodded towards where the motorcycle had been. "No helmets and there's still melting snow on the ground? That's an accident waiting to happen."

He looked at me and tilted his head. "What's the matter?"

"I think that was him."

"Him? Him who?"

Edward stared at me for a moment until the light bulb clearly went off.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" he growled.

"I don't know. I didn't get a good look. Maybe?"

"That doesn't make sense. I mean, who was the girl? If he's obsessed with you, why would he be running around with someone else?"

He was right, it didn't make sense. "You know what, I'm just being paranoid," I said shaking my head.

He put his free arm around me, his other hand holding onto Charlie as I pushed the cart towards the car. "I'd rather you be paranoid than caught off guard," Edward murmured.

The ride back was a little more animated. I sang Christmas songs with Charlie while Edward laughed. Charlie didn't really know the words to the songs, but he tried. He caught on to the chorus' pretty easily and sang loudly during those parts while mumbling through the rest of it.

When we got home, Edward got the tree all situated. We waited until after lunch and Charlie's nap before starting to decorate. By that time, the light outside was starting to fade.

We worked well as a team. Edward put things on the top, I put them in the middle, and Charlie hung everything on the bottom. I tried to take pictures of everything I could while still participating in the decorating. I may not have had any pictures of them together from previous years, but I would certainly be taking an abundance of them this year.

My phone rang and I took a step back to answer it. The tree was a chaotic mess, but I didn't care, it was still beautiful. Charlie was very focused on his task and every time he managed to get an ornament to stay on a branch, he grinned proudly.

"Hello," I laughed.

"Hey you," Alice's voice piped. "What's so funny?"

"We're decorating our Christmas tree."

"You're what?" Alice screeched.

I held the phone from my ear. "Jesus, Alice, tone it down a bit, will ya?"

"You're doing that without us?" This time she sounded hurt.

"We're doing ours just the three of us. Just like you and Jasper will do yours by yourself and Rose and Emmett will do theirs. Your mom's already planning to do the big family tree tomorrow night after Sunday dinner, okay?"

Alice was quiet for a minute. "Okay," she huffed. I could practically see her with her puppy dog eyes, her lower lip all stuck out and her foot stomping on the ground.

"Jeez, Alice, you're starting to sound more and more like Charlie every day.

She giggled. "I haven't seen you guys in forever. Mom told me what happened with Luke, but she didn't give me the deets. I neeeeed deets, Bella."

I grimaced. I didn't want to talk about it anymore.

"I don't have any deets, Alice," I mimicked her voice. "He got arrested while I was there. The cops said they had evidence of his guilt. What more can I say?"

"You don't know anything?"

"Not yet."

I turned my back to Edward and Charlie. "I want to go visit him this week; after the presentation."

"Really? Edward's okay with that?"

I snorted. "What do you think? It doesn't matter. He did all that work on the study, he deserves to know how it goes. If I can get a little bit of information while I'm at it, then bonus for me."

"Hmmm. Right. Well, anyway. I just missed you. Do ya wanna do lunch this week?"

"Sure. I'm free every day, but Tuesday."

"Oh, oh, oh, maybe you can see the new house. I've almost got it completely decorated."

"I'd love that, Alice," I agreed.

Alice and I chatted for a few more minutes before we hung up.

"How's my sister?" Edward asked, coming to stand next to me.

"She's fine. Nosy as usual. Complaining that we were doing this without her."

"Whatever, she'll get over it. She and Jasper put up their tree the day after Thanksgiving."

"Well that explains why she only threw a mini-fit," I laughed.

We watched Charlie put one last bulb on the tree and step back to admire his handwork.

"Ready for the star?" Edward asked.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" Charlie cheered, jumping up and down.

Edward lifted him up and I handed him the star to put on the very top of the tree. I snapped a picture. It took him a few tries, but finally he got it. Edward plugged it into one of the strands of lights and we were ready. I flipped the switch to turn out all the overhead lights and Edward hit the button to turn the tree lights on. It was just dark enough outside to get the effect of the twinkling lights.

Charlie's expression was fantastic. Edward's arm snaked around my waist and he kissed my temple. Our son was completely mesmerized.

The previous year we had spent with my dad, but he was a bachelor. He didn't get all into the holiday spirit. He put up a smaller tree with white lights and a few monochromatic bulbs. We couldn't put Christmas presents under the tree because he would most certainly rip into them when we weren't looking. It didn't really matter. Charlie was too young to really understand anyway.

This year was different. Charlie was so much more interested in the lights and the colors and the idea of presents. He was going to be surrounded by his parents and his grandparents, his aunts and uncles. I shivered at the thought of how many gifts the child was going to have to open.

I thought about telling everyone to only buy one present for him, but considering that this was their first Christmas with him, my request would have fallen on deaf ears. I'd let them have this. They deserved it. He deserved it.

XXXXX

The next evening we entered the Cullen house to find a massive tree in the corner of the room.

"Holy. . . .That is the biggest Christmas tree I've ever seen," I gaped. "How big is that thing?"

"Twelve feet," Carlisle grinned.

"Too big," Esme mouthed at me.

I snickered. Carlisle looked at his wife. "There's no such thing," he smirked.

"Says you," Esme retorted playfully.

"Gross, oh, oh, that's just . . . ewww, gross," Alice squealed from the sofa.

"What's gross?" Edward asked, walking into the room with Charlie on his back.

"You really don't want to know," Alice shuddered violently.

Jasper and I exchanged amused glances. Hey, they weren't our parents. Carlisle was pretty hot and Esme was beautiful. And, well, their teasing was probably a lot less disturbing to us than it was to the Cullen kids.

"Yo, yo, yo," Emmett's voice bellowed down the entryway. "The partay can begin, family."

"Emmie!" Charlie squealed, wiggling his way down Edward's back and throwing himself into the arms of his enormous uncle.

"Wazzup, my man?"

"I guess I know where I stand in the pecking order," Edward huffed jokingly.

"Your first in my pecking order," I teased, sticking my tongue out between my teeth before placing a light peck on his pouty lips.

"Now, come on. First them and now you two? Just stoooooop," Alice whined. I turned to face her about to give her the what for, but when our eyes met, she just winked.

"Where's Rose?"

Emmett rolled his eyes. "She's obsessing."

"About what," Esme asked, concerned.

"She can't fit into her size six's anymore and refuses to buy anything bigger so she sucked it up and bought some maternity clothes."

Alice scoffed. "Rosalie Cullen, get your beautiful pregnant ass in here!"

Rose stepped into the room. She looked absolutely fabulous. She had on a pair of dark skinny jeans, four inch stilettos and a grey sweater. Looking straight on, I never would have been able to tell she was pregnant, but when she turned to the side, I saw her bump and grinned.

"Oh, Rose, it's so cute," I cooed.

She hummed. "I'm just not used to it, okay?"

"Ah, Rose, you look beautiful, quit yer bitchin," Edward said sarcastically.

Rose shot him the evil eye, but I could see her mouth fighting a smile.

Sunday dinner was full of playful banter and teasing. Charlie ended up with mashed potatoes in his hair and Emmett swore that he had nothing to do with it.

"You know, payback's a bitch, Em," Edward laughed. "I've got six months plus to plan out all the things I'm gonna teach that niece or nephew of mine."

"What?" Emmett shrugged with a cheeky grin on his face.

Afterwards, Esme made apple cider and mulled wine and Charlie helped her make gingerbread cookies while the men fought about the best way to string the lights onto the monster tree. The girls and I sat back, giggling and laughing. They respected my request not to talk about Luke or the James guy following me. I just wanted to have a nice family night, uninfected by outside bullshit.

Alice put on Christmas music and danced around with a giggling Charlie in her arms. I looked over and saw Edward and Jasper tip beer bottles towards each other with smiles on their faces. Emmett was sitting on the sofa next to Rose with his hand on her barely there belly.

"Knock knock. Anybody home?"

I'm sure that my eyes must have popped out of my head as I jumped from my seat. My dad entered the room, still in uniform.

"Dad! I didn't know you were coming."

"Yes, well, I didn't know if I'd be able to, but Leland's taking the shift so. . .well here I am."

My dad made his rounds and before I knew it, he was standing next to Edward, who handed him a beer. He leaned in, put his hand on Edward's shoulder and spoke to him quietly. I watched as they interacted. There was no longer any tension between the two. In fact, they looked quite comfortable in each other's presence. My father looked him directly in the eyes as they spoke. Edward frowned, but nodded.

_Hmmm, going to have to ask what that was all about._

It didn't last long though. My dad said something else and Edward laughed and clapped him on the back.

It was only a matter of time before we were all on our feet adding bobbles and homemade ornaments to the Cullen monster tree. Emmett held Charlie on his shoulders to reach the higher parts. Alice flittered around taking pictures of everyone, occasionally using the video mode.

I stuck my tongue out at her, squealing when Edward grabbed me around the waist and dipped me so far that my head nearly hit the ground. He waggled his eyebrows and me and pressed his lips against my collarbone before bringing me back up.

I stumbled a bit when he let me go, the blood rushing to my head.

"Whoa there, sweetheart," he laughed, holding out his arms.

"Jerk," I pouted, childishly pushing him away.

Alice handed the camera off to Esme who proceeded to snap about two-hundred photos in a matter of minutes.

"Oh, my goodness," Alice squeaked. "I forgot about this one."

I turned to see her holding a laminated piece of paper with a string attached to the top.

"What is it?" I asked, squinting.

She brought it closer to me and turned it to face me. There was a picture of Edward as a little boy and a hand print.

"Oooooh."

**Edward Masen: Age 4 ½**

I had forgotten that Carlisle didn't adopt Emmett, Edward, and Alice until Edward was seven.

Charlie reached for the ornament in my hand and looked at it.

"Das me," he announced.

I laughed. "No, that's your daddy, baby."

He shook his head. "No, das me."

"I remember when you made that," Esme smiled. "That was in pre-kindergarten. In Chicago."

"I don't remember that," Edward said, taking the ornament and looking at it. "You wanna hang it on the tree for me, Charlie?"

Charlie nodded.

It took us a while, but eventually the entire tree was covered in ornaments. I collapsed onto Edward's lap. Everyone relaxed into quiet conversation, drinking their wine, cider or beer. The music was still playing softly and a fire was simmering in the fireplace. Charlie was lying with his head on Rose's knee. She stroked his cheek and hummed unconsciously. His eyes were glazing over; his blinks getting longer and longer. Eventually they just stayed closed and Edward and I called it a night. We wrapped our son in a blanket and carried him back to our apartment.

"What was it my dad said to you?" I asked as we were climbing into bed.

"When?"

"When you brought him the beer? You looked. . . unsettled."

"Oh," he frowned. "He said that they might have found a link between us and James Hunter, but they'd know more this week."

"A link. Like, maybe I've met him before?" That idea was a little scary. I didn't remember ever coming into contact with him before, but I supposed it was possible.

Edward snuggled into my side and nuzzled his nose against my cheek.

"Don't worry about it, baby. We'll figure it all out."

His words were so convincing I couldn't help but believe them.

XXXXXX

Monday morning found me sitting in the doctor's office waiting for Sheryl, the Nurse Practitioner, again. My blood tests had come back and she wanted to talk to me.

I was called back into one of the little rooms, the nurse's assistant frowning when she'd seen that I'd lost two pounds in less than a week.

"You're going to disappear soon if you keep that up," she said. I wasn't sure if it was a joke or a warning. It wasn't such a big deal. You couldn't even tell really.

I waited impatiently, my knees bouncing, fingers tapping. I played Angry Birds even though there was a sign on the back of the door that clearly said PLEASE TURN OFF CELL PHONES.

Finally, the door opened.

"Hi, Bella," Sheryl smiled as she stepped into the room.

"Hi," I almost whimpered.

_She's smiling right? She wouldn't be smiling if I was dying._

"So, we were right. Your blood test shows that you have a B12 deficiency and iron deficiency anemia. That's probably what's causing the exhaustion and headaches too. With the heavier periods that you experience because of your IUD and the fact that you really don't have an iron rich diet, it's not really a surprise."

I nodded.

"Plus, you've been under such stress, Bella. You need to start taking better care of yourself or you're going to end up getting very sick. You're not going to be useful to anyone if you're lying in a hospital bed."

She brought out a pad of paper and started scribbling. "I'm going to prescribe you an iron tablet. You should take it with some Orange Juice. Vitamin C helps with the absorption. You need to increase your red meat intake. Not by a lot, but from what you said you rarely eat it so just add a meal or two each week, maybe some eggs. Lots of spinach or kale. Dried peaches and apricots are really good too. And I want you to get a multivitamin. Actually, believe it or not, a good prenatal vitamin would do wonders for you."

I just looked at her as she was speaking to me. I hated pills. Big ones, small ones, they were all the same; always getting stuck in my throat.

"Don't look like that, Bella. Once you get your levels back to normal you can come off of the iron supplements and just work on getting it in your food, but for now. . . you need to do this."

"I think I'd rather be pregnant than anemic," I mumbled.

She laughed. "You'd still have to take them." Her face then turned confused. "Wait, are you going to be trying to get pregnant."

"No," I yelped. "I just. . .nevermind."

"I would recommend that you not even think about it until your levels stabilize. Your body can barely support you right now, much less someone else."

"I'm not thinking about it," I protested.

She looked at me with an analytical look on her face.

"I'm not!" I sort of laughed.

"Okay, well, I want you back here in six weeks for another draw."

"Uh huh," I agreed reluctantly.

She handed me my prescription and opened the door. "I'm serious, Bella. Vitamin deficiencies are not something to mess around with."

I dressed quickly and bolted, stopping only to schedule my next appointment.

I stopped by the pharmacy, picking up my prescription, along with the prenatal vitamins. I guess I didn't really think about it when I set them on my bathroom counter top.

"Beeeeeellllllaaa," Edward yelled when he got home from work.

I ran into the bedroom in a panic. "What?"

He held up the bottle. "Uh," he choked. "Are you? Um, shit, are you fucking. . . ?"

Does he actually look anything other than completely petrified?

"Oh, God. No, Edward, I'm not," I stumbled.

"Then, um, what are these?"

I stepped in front of him and took them out of his hand. "They're prenatal vitamins, baby. Sheryl, the nurse practitioner thought that they'd be the best thing for me. I'm taking iron supplements too."

"Anemia?"

I nodded. "And low B12. She said that the stress is probably at the root of it. It's affecting my eating and sleeping. That's why the anemia, weight loss, headaches, all of it."

"Hmmm. I don't want you to stress," he said, cupping my jaw in his hands. "Let me take care of you."

"You do take care of me."

"You need a little TLC," he smirked.

I laughed. "Always an angle isn't there?"

He chuckled and then straightened up. "I'm serious, Bella. Let me be the worrier for awhile. I promise, as soon as you feel better I'll let you have some of it back if you really want it, but for right now, just give it all to me."

That night, Edward and I made love; slowly, affectionately. He took his time touching every inch of my skin. He was calming me before the big day. It worked. . . well almost. I was lulled into a warm place, wrapped up in his strong arms and just about to drift into a peaceful oblivion when the most horrible sound ever pierced through me.

Edward just about hit the ceiling. "Fuck! What the hell?"

He threw on a pair of boxers that were on the floor next to the bed and stumbled out of the bedroom and down the hallway. I groaned and buried my head under a pillow.

Five minutes later, Edward was back, holding Charlie in his arms.

"He wouldn't let me put him back down," he whispered. "I think he had a nightmare. He said the dog bit him?"

"Huh," I said tiredly, motioning for him with my hands. My brain wasn't capable of any more thought than that.

Edward handed him to me and he curled up in my arms, snuggling down with a slight smile on his lips.

"I think we just got played," I laughed.

Edward chuckled and climbed into bed on the other side of Charlie. His arm draped over our son's body and rested on my hip. Before I knew it, both boys were snoring lightly, bad dreams all but forgotten.

XXXXXX

The next morning I slept on the way to Seattle. I was exhausted. Charlie's midnight visit to our bed was riddled with kicks and punches and even after Edward was able to get him settled back into his own bed, I had trouble falling back to sleep.

Edward parked the car in the visitors lot and walked me to the classroom where I would be doing my presentation. I was so freaking nervous I was nearly hyperventilating.

"You'll do fine," he soothed with a gentle kiss to my lips. "You know this shit."

I nodded and stuck my thumb nail in between my teeth.

"Don't do that," he scolded, pulling my hand from my mouth. "I'm supposed to start out at the Health Sciences building, but I guess there's some sort of tour and a meet and greet. Just text me when you're done, okay?"

"Okay," I whispered.

I tried to hold onto his hand as he began walking away, but eventually I had to let go or we'd both be late. I opened the door with my messenger bag slung over my shoulder to face a panel of seven people. In the back of the room sat two young women. They were giggling and talking to each other, but smiled at me as I started to set up.

"Oh, hi, Bella," Dr. Stalworth smiled. "You're right on time."

She introduced the panel, finally landing on Dr. Alec Weaver. He was the one providing most of the funding for the study and he made me exceptionally nervous. He was an older gentleman with bright blue eyes and grey hair. His face was bearded and he wore glasses.

"Welcome, Ms. Swan," he said briskly. He wasn't giving me confidence that he was supportive of letting me do this.

"Thank you." My voice sounded weak and unsure.

"We're sorry that you're here under such circumstances."

I nodded and smiled faintly.

"But it is fortunate that you have been such an integral part of this study enough to present before us today."

I could feel my hands starting to shake. I had no idea if I was going to do this right or not. Obviously Dr. Stalworth sensed my anxiety.

"Don't worry, Bella," she smiled. "We understand that you weren't expecting to do this on your own and that you have never presented before. Just do your best."

She turned around to face the girls at the back.

"Bella, this is Amy and Desiree. They are some of our top undergraduates who are looking at the graduate program. We were hoping that you wouldn't mind having them here to observe."

My eyes widened. What the hell? I was already nervous and they wanted me to be some sort of an example?

"Um, no, that'll be fine," I squeaked out.

"They understand that you haven't been the primary on this study. They are simply here to witness what a presentation might look like."

I swallowed and bit my lip as I set up my laptop and opened up PowerPoint. I had my notes, I had my laser pointer, I had everything I needed; now all I needed was to suck it up and give a kick ass presentation.

Forty-five minutes later I walked out of the room and collapsed into a chair in the hallway. I was exhausted; physically and mentally exhausted.

I heard the door open and click shut next to me and leopard print kitten heels came into my line of sight.

"Hi, Bella," Dr. Stalworth's voice said quietly. "Would you like to come with me for a moment?"

She said it as though it was a request, but I really wasn't sure I had the option. I stood up and followed her through the hallways.

"Have a seat," she smiled waving her hands towards the chair that sat opposite her desk.

I did as she asked and sat down. My knee was bouncing erratically and I chewed on the tip of my thumbnail.

"Are you going to put my out of my misery?" I asked nervously.

She rested her elbows on the desk and clasped her hands in front of her. "You did wonderfully. You were put in such a horrible and frustrating position and you not only handled it professionally, you were amazingly thorough."

I let out a huge puff of air and Dr. Stalworth laughed.

"I'm sorry, Bella."

I met her gaze and saw a sadness that I didn't quite understand.

"Umm. . ."

"I've known Luke for a long time. He was a student of mine in graduate school."

She hesitated for a moment and then continued. "I also knew Cammy."

_Oh._

"I don't know what happened. I'm not sure I want to know. I'm just sorry that you had to deal with the fallout."

She had no idea.

"What are your plans for your educational future?" She asked, changing the subject quickly. "Do you intend on going forward with graduate school or are you looking for employment?"

"I'm not quite sure, to be honest. I'd like to go back to school, but. . ." I stopped.

_But what?_

"I think I'd like to pursue a PhD in child and adolescent psychology," I admitted.

"You seem unsure," she said squinting her eyes at me slightly. "Is there something stopping you?"

Was there something stopping me? No, not really. Edward was in full support of me going back to school, but how could I possibly do that? With him in medical school, we were barely going to see him as it was. Add to that graduate school for me. We'd be lucky if we remembered what each other looked like after that, let alone spend quality time with Charlie.

"No, not at all. It's just a matter of figuring out the details."

"Of course," she nodded. "Well, I highly recommend that you apply to our program here. I think you would do well and we would be happy to have you. You already have more experience than a lot of our applicants. If you choose to go somewhere else, I would be happy to write you a letter of recommendation as would several of my colleagues."

"Thank you. I do appreciate that. I suppose I should probably start figuring all that out," I chuckled.

"You should know that this study is still eligible for publication despite Luke's current situation. I will be submitting it on behalf of the department as well as the funders. You will be considered a secondary author and your name may be published alongside Luke's. Is that something you're comfortable with?"

_Well shit, I never thought about that._

"Uh, I. . . yeah, I guess so. I hadn't even considered that," I admitted.

"Okay, well, I'll be in touch. I just wanted to let you know how much we appreciated you stepping up. Everyone on the committee was impressed as were our two undergraduates. You represented yourself with utmost dignity and professionalism, so thank you."

Inside I was squealing like a twelve-year-old fan girl. At least I hoped it was only inside. I wasn't so sure after she started chuckling at me.

We said our goodbyes and the second I was out of the building ,I was texting Edward. He didn't respond right away so I figured he must still be in his interview. I made my way over to the Health Sciences building.

I had no idea where Edward would be so I just sat in the lobby and waited. I was waiting a really long time. An hour later, he finally texted me.

**Are you done? ~E~**

**Yes, I'm done. In the Health Sciences lobby. ~B~**

**I'll come get you ~E~**

About five minutes later he sauntered into the lobby. He looked so freaking sexy. He was wearing a pair of black slacks with a green long-sleeved button down shirt and a black tie. His hair looked like he'd been running his hands through it all morning, which he probably had.

"Hey, baby," he purred, wrapping his arms around me.

"How did your interview go?" I asked, pecking his lips lightly.

"Fine. How'd your presentation go?"

I frowned. "That's all I get? Fine?"

Edward sighed. "Fine. It went just like the others. They asked me questions, I answered them. Then I asked them questions about their program. We went on a tour, I met with some of the other faculty members, we said goodbye and shook hands, and. . . ta da! All done."

"You're such a smart ass."

He grinned and wrapped his arm around me. "Now, how was your presentation?"

"It went well, actually."

"Why do you sound so surprised?"

"I don't know. I just. . . I wasn't so sure. I was really nervous. I was afraid I'd screw up and start swearing or something."

Edward chuckled. "You don't give yourself enough credit."

"Dr. Stalworth asked me what I was planning on doing from here."

Edward looked at me. "And?"

"And, I think it's time for me to take the GRE and hope my scores are good enough to get me into grad school."

"Okay," he nodded. "Your scores will be good enough, I have no doubt."

"Well, I've got time. I probably won't be able to get into a program starting next fall, but maybe the year after. That'll give me time to study and you time to settle into school."

Edward stopped walking and turned to face me. He looked at me in question.

"I'm okay with wherever you want to go, baby. If you want to go to Harvard, I'm okay with that. If you want to stay here, close to family, I'm okay with that too. Charlie and I will go with you."

"What about what you want?"

"I just want to be with you. I want us to be a family. Once we know where we're going, I can apply anywhere."

Edward looked troubled.

"This is how relationships work, baby. We have to make compromises."

"Explain to me how I'm compromising. I get what I want regardless. I go to the school of my choice and I get to come home to you and Charlie every night."

"So, I make a compromise now. You'll have plenty of opportunity to make them in the future, trust me. You're all those steps ahead of me, Edward. It doesn't make sense for us to do things any other way."

I watched his eyes as he mulled over the thought. "I just don't want you to always think that what you want should come second."

"I don't," I assured before flashing him a grin.

"Okay, we'll sit down this week and talk pros and cons of each school. Sound good?"

I nodded and lifted myself onto my tip toes to kiss his chin.

"Good. Let's go get some lunch. All the other applicants are meeting with some of the current med students in the lounge. They've ordered some sandwiches."

"Uh, I can't go in there, I'm not an applicant or a med student," I protested leaning backwards. "Why don't you go and I'll go to the student center and get something."

Edward rolled his eyes. "Don't be ridiculous. I already asked, Bella. There's no way in hell you're going to eat lunch by yourself, sweetheart. They're fine with you joining us."

His eyes shifted a little. I grabbed his chin; he was hiding something.

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked suspiciously.

"Um. . . ." he hesitated. "I thought it would be less confusing and a little bit more professional if I just told them you were my wife."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You're doing that a lot, you know?"

He grinned crookedly. "You and I both know that you're more than that to me. Besides, girlfriend sounds so. . . high school; wife sounds so much more dignified."

"Ha," I snorted. "You are incorrigible."

He reached out his hand for me. "Come on, _dear_, let's go schmooze."

I grabbed it and followed him down the hallway.

XXXXXXX

"I'm going, Edward."

"Bella, come on," he growled in frustration.

"No, he deserves to know."

We had been fighting about it for nearly three days.

"He's in jail. He's in jail for killing someone, Bella. He doesn't deserve anything from you."

"I'll pick you up at four."

Edward growled at me and got out of the car. "You're just gonna leave Charlie with Jake all day?"

Charlie's pre-school had a teacher work day and was closed. We had dropped him off at the reservation on our way to Port Angeles.

"Jesus, Jake hasn't seen him in weeks. He was practically begging me to bring him by so yes, I'm going to let them have some time together. They'll be fine. Go to work."

Edward shut the door a little more firmly than he needed to and I was about to leave when his knuckle rapped at the window. I rolled it down.

"I love you. Be careful." He sounded resigned.

"I love you too. Where is it that you think I'm going? I'm gonna be surrounded by cops and security guards. It's Luke, baby. I've spent the last five months alone in a room with him and he has done absolutely nothing to me."

"He stared at your tits."

"Oh my God, get over it. Lots of men stare at my tits."

"Are you trying to make me feel better?"

"No. Go to work."

Edward leaned in, kissing me quickly before turning to go into the clinic.

I had to hang out at the coffee shop for a couple of hours before I could head to the prison. Visiting hours didn't start until ten. I was a little nervous. That is where I had seen that James character first. I kept my eyes open, but didn't see him.

I made it back to Clallam Bay fairly quickly and checked in. My dad had pulled a few strings in getting me in. Luke had put me on the visitors list, but technically there should have been a waiting period before I was approved.

We weren't allowed to be in the same room. Instead, I was brought into a room with these little cubicles. Each one had a beige phone hanging on the wall and on the other side of the glass was an identical set up.

I sat down and waited. A few minutes later, Luke came in. He shuffled his feet as though they were chained together. His hands were chained, I could see the cuffs. He wore an orange jumpsuit. A white tag across his chest had a DOC number on it.

He sat down and the guard un-cuffed him and stepped back. I picked up the phone and he did the same.

"Hey," I said quietly.

"Hi, Bella," Luke sighed.

Silence.

_Well what the hell do I say now?_

"Um, I did the presentation on Tuesday."

One corner of his lip turned upwards. "How did it go?"

"It went fine. Good. They were impressed with all the work we did."

I went on to tell him the questions that they asked and about how Dr. Stalworth had offered to write me a letter of recommendation.

"I wish I could write you one, Bella, but I'm pretty sure it would be more detrimental than anything else," he said sadly. "You were honestly the best assistant I've had."

"It's okay, Luke. I'll survive."

"Do you know where you're going to apply?"

"No, not yet."

We sat in silence again for a few minutes until the guard gave a five minute warning. Then Luke spoke again.

"I'm pleading guilty," he blurted.

"You're what?"

"I. . . it was an accident. She threatened to go to the board. She said she was going to report me for sexual harassment. She was going to lie, Bella. She was going to tell them that I forced her to have sex with me so that she could keep her job."

Luke was talking frantically. He looked almost frightened.

"So you fucking killed her?" I gaped.

"No. . . yes. She was screaming at me. I grabbed her wrist and she slapped me. She told me I was loser who had to sink to sleeping with my graduate students and lonely, desperate little assistants to get laid. I lost it, Bella. I...I...Oh, God," he choked, going very pale. "There was so much blood."

He squeezed his eyes shut as if that simple act could erase the scene from his memory. "I freaked out. I knocked over a candle and the curtains caught fire. I...I didn't know what to do so I just ran. I went to my parent's house. I didn't know she was still alive or I would have pulled her out of there."

Luke's hands were in his hair and I was pretty sure that he was about to pull clumps out. The expression of devastation on his face almost made me want to cry.

I sat there with my hand over my mouth. Never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined Luke being capable of something like that, but I guess everyone has their breaking points.

"You need to stop talking now, Luke," I warned. I didn't know who was listening, but I wouldn't lie for him if they called me up to testify.

"I've already told them this. They're charging me with third degree assault and involuntary manslaughter in exchange for my plea," he said, taking a deep breath to try and steady himself.

"How many years?" I swallowed.

"Forty-eight months for the manslaughter and an additional three for the assault charge. Plus, I'm going to lose my license." Luke's speech was unwavering, but I could see the anguish in his eyes.

He sort of laughed humorlessly and shook his head. "You know, I actually cared about her, Bella. At one point, I thought that maybe I could fall in love with her. I was an idiot. She played me for a fool and I let her."

I stared at him, completely confused by his statement. Cammy was cold and callous. How on earth could he ever have fallen for that?

The guard approached behind him and Luke sighed. "I'm sorry, Bella."

He hung up the phone and stood up, letting the guard replace his cuffs before he hobbled back through the door.

When I was back in my car, I texted Edward.

**Everything's okay. I'm on my way to the rez. Love you. ~B~**

I didn't get a response right away, but as I was pulling up to Jake's house, my phone buzzed.

**I'm glad. We can talk tonight? Love you too. ~E~**

I typed out a quick response as I stepped out of the car.

**Yes, got some interesting info. I'll be with Jake. ~B~**

**Okay, can't wait. Have fun. Tell Jake I say hi. ~E~**

I knocked on the door and waited. A few minutes later Billy opened the door.

"Why hello, stranger," he smiled widely. "What's your name again?"

"Ha ha, Billy. I know it's been a while, but life, ya know?" I stepped inside. rubbing my already freezing hands together. The little cabin provided some much needed warmth.

"Yes, I do know. I also know that you and Charlie have a new man in your lives."

"Well, kind of," I shrugged.

"From what your pops tells me, you're happy."

I nodded. "I am. Charlie is too. Edward's a good man."

Billy hummed. "Jake and Charlie are on the beach."

"Really? It's freaking cold out there."

Billy laughed. "He's all bundled up, sweetheart, don't worry. Claire's on a knitting kick. She made two hats for him."

"Two?"

"He insisted on wearing them both," he grinned.

"Ah, yes. Why doesn't that surprise me?"

"Go. They shouldn't be far."

I walked down to the beach and saw Jake and Charlie sitting on some logs, a roaring fire in the pit in front of them.

"Hey, baby girl," Jake greeted as I approached.

"Mama, Me and Uncka Jake made a fire."

"I see that, baby. You did an excellent job."

"And Cwaire maked me two hats!" he said holding up two fingers with one hand while the other hand held the rest of his fingers down.

"I know, they're both on your head. Are they keeping you warm?"

Charlie nodded, tugging them down over his ears.

"Did you say thank you?"

"Ummm, I fink so," he said, biting his lip.

"He did," Jake chuckled. "He was very polite."

"If nothing else, my kid's got manners, right?" I laughed.

"That he does," Jake sniffed. You do what you need to do?"

I sat down next to him and leaned into his shoulder. "Yup."

"How did it go?"

"Uh, it went. He's pleading guilty."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

We didn't say anything more. That's part of why I loved Jake so much. He very rarely pushed an issue. We sat there for a little while longer before going to meet up with Claire for lunch.

"She makes you happy," I stated as we walked back to Jake's.

"Yes, she does," he smiled a little shyly.

"Have you told her you love her?" I grabbed his hand, threading my fingers through his and swinging our arms.

"No."

"I think you should."

Jake just sighed.

"She loves you too. I can tell."

"Yeah."

And that was it. We spent another hour at Jake's and then our way up to Sequim to Costco. By the time we were done, it was time to pick up Edward.

He was unusually quiet on the way home. Much to my chagrin, Charlie fell asleep, not having had a nap. I was able to tell Edward what Luke had told me though.

He just nodded.

"What's the matter with you?" I asked.

Edward swallowed and glanced at me. "Your dad called me this afternoon."

"Okay."

"They found out more information about your stalker."

"Oh, well that's good news, right?"

"Mmmm," Edward hummed.

"So, what's the information?" I asked tilting my head curiously.

"He went to Harvard. He was expelled a little over two years ago after he assaulted a professor."

"Harvard?" I gasped. "Do you know him?"

Edward shrugged. "I don't know. He looked a little bit familiar in that mug shot. I've been trying to place him all day and. . . I just can't."

"So, he just happened to go to Harvard while you were there and is now following me? I don't get it. Why would he have sex with Cammy, and in our room at that? That would be one hell of a coincidence," I said disbelievingly.

"I don't know what his connection to Cammy is," he frowned. But, they don't think it's a coincidence, Bella. They think he's after you, because of me."

XXXXXX

**AN: **

**Ah, so a few things laid to rest for you all. No, Bella is not pregnant. Yes, Luke really did kill Cammy, but not intentionally. Like Bella said, everyone has their breaking points. Unfortunately for Cammy, she pushed him over the edge. **

**A few hints here and there and Bella and Edward finally addressing some things about their future. Woohoo.**

**Okay, so I really have to take a week off next week. I have been suffering from really severe exhaustion due to a few medical issues (nothing too serious, but something I need to take care of) Doctor said it might get worse before it gets better. I just don't want UP's quality to suffer b/c I'm too tired, ya know? I'll still be working, b/c I love writing, but I'll be doing it at a slower pace for the next week or two.**

**NEXT CHAPTER: Will be Christmas and we might even get a little bit into that Vail Vacay! Enjoy the calm. ;o)**

**REC: An Undefined Affair by jayhawkbb: Bella, recovering from a broken heart, meets Edward, who isolates himself emotionally. Their attraction is immediate, but can they be friends and lovers - without the love? BxE, all the regs, some drama, some funny, lemony, language AH**

**This was rec'd to me by my PLF girls and I am really enjoying it. Edward is the Executive Vice-President of a Software company and Bella works for an ad agency handling the account. There's an instant connection, but neither one does serious relationships, so they agree to a friends with benefits situation. Well, we all know how that usually works out. LOL. I don't think I can do it justice, so just go read. I don't think it's getting nearly the amount of attention and reviews that it should so go check it out. :o) **


	32. Everything That I Am

**AN: Oh, it feels like it's been forever. LOL. Thank you so much everyone for all of your support these past couple of weeks. I am feeling so much better. You have no idea.**

**Every single review means so much to me. I apologize if I missed anyone. FFnet was acting up and kept giving me the message that I had already responded when I didn't remember doing it. Again, I am not as good at responding to reviews from earlier chapters, but I do try. Please know that I really do appreciate them. **

**Thank you Mel for pre-reading and all the other stuff you do for me. LOL. I'm keeping you busy these days. :o) **

**Thank you Mollie for being my beta extraordinaire. I swear I'll find the source of those phantom commas one of these days. LOL.**

**All mistakes are mine cause I did some tweaking on my own.**

**So, this chapter may require some tissues for some people. And because I know a lot of you are waiting for the ball to drop with all the twists and turns, I want you to sit back and relax this chapter. This is an enjoyable time of year for our little family. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own. **

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 30: Everything that I am

EPOV

"Edward?"

"Hey, Chief, what's up?" I asked, wondering why Bella's dad was calling me in the middle of the day.

He cleared his throat. "When you and Bella were in here looking at those mug shots, did you recognize James Hunter?"

"Um, he looked a little bit familiar, yeah, but I don't know from where. I mean, he could have been a patient here at the clinic."

"No, I don't think so," he mumbled.

"Why? Have you found out who he is?"

"Not exactly, but we have found out some information."

"What information?" I asked quickly. If he knew something, he needed to tell me.

"Could you have met him in Boston?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to remember the guy's face. "Maybe? I don't know, Chief. I'm sorry." I was silent for two beats before I finally processed what he had just asked me. "Wait, why? Is he from Boston?"

"James Hunter was expelled from Harvard two years ago for assaulting a professor. He served two months in jail and then disappeared. He still has a P.O. Box in Boston, but the last time he picked up his mail was some time last spring."

"Shit, Chief. I'll try and remember."

The line was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. "Son, I have to ask you this."

_I don't like the sound of that. _

"I know that you are a different person now than you were, but is there any way you pissed someone off bad enough for them to want revenge?"

"Revenge? What kind of revenge?"

Chief Swan sighed heavily. "The kind that would cause him to go after Bella?"

_Oh, Fuck!_

"You think he's after Bella because of something I did to him?"

"It's a theory, yes."

"I...I pissed off a lot of people, Chief."

I could practically see the disappointment on his face through the phone.

"That's what I thought. Alright, Edward. You keep thinking about it. I can't work on the actual break-in, but I can work on trying to find out who he is and where he is now. I'll keep you up to date."

"Thanks, Chief."

"Oh, and Edward?"

"Yeah?"

"If you can help it, don't let my daughter out of your sight."

Damn it! At least Bella was away from the jail and with Jake now. I trusted Jake to look after her; and Charlie too.

"I won't, Chief."

And luckily I would be able to keep that promise, because my vacation started the second Bella picked me up that afternoon. I wouldn't have to go back until January and hopefully, by then, they would have caught the fucker and we'd have our answers.

The next ten days flew by. It was too cold and wet to go to the park, but we spent a lot of time at that bouncy castle place. On one of the days that Jasper and Alice joined us, I may or may not have groped my girl in one of the dark corners of the inflatable obstacle course. We were supposed to be racing Charlie, but he had already exited and had convinced Jasper to jump with him in another bouncy. There were no other kids where we were and we were hidden well enough. Bella, of course, squealed and tried to push me away, but I saw the look in her eye. She wanted it.

"I'm gonna have to rent one of these aren't I," I groaned as she escaped my clutches and took off, wobbling through the rubber obstacles.

"You're such a perv," Bella giggled when I caught up to her, grabbing her waist and kissing the back of her head.

"Mmmm," I hummed. "Yeah, I am."

"He's gonna make a wonderful daddy some day," Alice said absentmindedly as we watched Jasper pretend to body slam Charlie.

I saw Bella slip her hand into Alice's and give it a squeeze. Alice looked at her and smiled before letting go and joining her fiancé and nephew.

"I have a feeling Charlie's going to have lots and lots of cousins to play with," I laughed.

"I hope so," Bella sighed.

XXXXXXX

During the two weeks leading up to Christmas, Bella and I cashed in two babysitting certificates with Rose and Emmett, leaving Charlie at their house overnight while we went out. We figured we might as well take advantage before a) The baby arrived and b) we left the area if that's what we were going to do.

The first time, I took Bella out to dinner and a movie in Port Angeles. On the way home, she was all frisky and started rubbing me through my jeans. Again I was amazed at how perfect the woman was for me.

"Fuck, baby, you gotta stop. I can't fucking think while you're doing that," I moaned, making sure to keep my eyes on the road and a firm grip on the wheel.

"I wanna suck your cock so bad," she mewled.

God, the way she said it, I almost didn't need her to put her mouth on me. I could have cum in my pants. But what would the fun have been in that? When she lowered her head to my lap and began unzipping my pants I had to pull over. There was a turnoff up ahead that I knew was secluded. Jasper, Alice, and I used to go there to smoke up in high school. Well, Jasper and I smoked up, Alice was our designated driver. I didn't actually know where it went, but I was pretty sure that we wouldn't be spotted. The last thing I needed at that moment was for a cop to stop and try to help us.

_Thank you for the help, officer, but no, the Chief's daughter has everything under control._

The gravel crunched beneath the tires as I made my way slowly into the trees. When I couldn't see the headlights from the cars on the highway anymore, I stopped. I turned off the lights just as Bella was pulling my dick out of my pants and enveloping it with her mouth.

_Warm, wet, oh, so fucking good._

My hands gripped her hair and my hips thrust upwards. Over and over again I fucked her mouth. When she opened her throat and swallowed around the tip I knew I had to stop.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck. I can't. . . Ugh, Bella, I don't want to cum in your mouth," I grunted.

That was sort of a lie, I did want to cum in her mouth, but I wanted to cum inside of her a whole lot more.

Bella slowed down and then stopped, pulling her mouth from my still aching erection. "Why?" she frowned, wiping the corner of her mouth with her thumb.

The moonlight was just bright enough to let me see her gorgeous face, which was looking a little irritated at the moment.

I looked at her bare leg, which was now bouncing agitatedly on the floor. I suddenly had a fan-fucking-tastic idea. "Fuck, baby, get out."

"Uh, e. . .excuse me? What the hell, Edward?"

I opened my door and then turned back, grabbing her chin in my hand and kissing her roughly. "Get out," I repeated gruffly.

I heard Bella huff, but I wasn't worried. I tucked myself back into my boxers, cause, it was kind of cold out and I didn't want any shrinkage before I got back to business. I ran around the back of the car and popped it open, smiling as I spotted the fleece blanket that was stuffed in the corner.

"Edward, it's fucking cold out here," Bella growled, wrapping her arms around herself. She hadn't put her coat on yet because it was in the backseat of the car. All she was wearing was a long-sleeved, knee length sweater dress. She took one look at the blanket in my hands and shook her head. "If you think I'm fucking you on the ground out here, you're crazy," she laughed.

I smirked at her. "No, not on the ground."

"Then where?" she asked, completely confused. I grabbed her hand and pulled her to the front of the car, lying the blanket on the hood. "I don't want you to burn your tits."

"My tits? Why would I bu. . . Oh!" She gasped as I spun her around and pressed her upper body against the hood.

I put my hand down next her head and leaned over her. The heat from the engine was warming everything up nicely. "I'm gonna fuck you just like this. Is that okay with you?" I asked, letting my breath fan out across her ear.

She nodded and I could see that lip of hers get pulled in between her teeth.

"Fucking gorgeous," I whispered, running my hand down her back and over her ass. When I reached the edge of her dress I dragged my fingers up the inside of her thigh. I pushed her panties out of the way and she arched her back slightly as I touched her core. I began to tease her flesh, which was becoming wetter by the second, and with my other hand I readied myself. I stroked my dick a few times, just to make sure.

_Yup, we're good to go!_

Of course I was. I was always good to go when it came to Bella. I didn't give her any warning before I thrust myself into her. As good as her mouth felt, her pussy felt a thousand times better.

"Ugh, Edward," she whimpered as her body was forced into the hood with a thud.

Normally, I probably would have been panicking a little and the possibility of denting my brand new car, but at the moment, inside of my girl, I couldn't give two shits about the fucking piece of metal.

"You like it?" I asked, pulling back out slowly before pushing back in again.

__

Say yes, say yes, say yes.

"Uh huh!" she moaned. "More, please, Edward, I need more."

__

I'll give you more, my love. I'll give you So. *thrust* Much. *thrust* More.

"Fuck, I love you," I growled.

"Edwaaard," she cried out. "I ca...I can't...faster, go faster. Ahhh!"

I sped my movements while continuing to hold Bella to the hood with one hand against the middle of her back. The other one gripped her hip as I pounded into her relentlessly. Her hands were clutching at the blanket beneath her as she submitted herself to me. I could feel her getting close. I bent my knees and changed my angle slightly causing her to cry out as she came. Within seconds I joined her, feeling her orgasm completely milking my cock.

A flock of birds were obviously disturbed by our noises, as they took off, flapping wings and screeching in annoyance.

I rested my hands on the rapidly cooling hood on either side of her, bending down to kiss the damp skin at the nape of her neck. My chest was heaving from the exertion, as was Bella's. I righted her underwear and pulled her dress down before helping her stand. Her legs were a little wobbly and I couldn't help but laugh.

"You okay there, baby?"

"Yes," she squeaked out, adjusting herself and running her hands through her hair. "Are you?" she smirked.

I grinned. "I'm more than okay. Right now, I'm fucking fantastic. You ready to go home?"

Bella nodded. "That might have been the best pit stop ever," she giggled.

_Note to self. Hood sex with Bella is fucking amazing! Definitely putting that one on the 'to do again' list. Preferably in the summer when I can strip her down and do it naked._

XXXXXXX

The second time we left Charlie was to go out dancing with Alice and Jasper, Jake and Claire. I was a little nervous. Mostly because we had yet to go out dancing without some sort of drama. But it turned out that my fears were unnecessary. I silently laughed at myself that I had once questioned whether Jake was Charlie's father. The way they interacted left no room for any doubt that they were just friends. We drank, we danced, we had a good time and Bella and I fucked like rabbits when we got home.

We were taking every chance we could get to be together, because when Charlie was at home it was becoming harder to find time for just the two of us. He had, for some unknown reason, begun waking up in the middle of the night and climbing into bed with us. Every night. And suddenly, he decided that he wasn't going to take naps anymore.

What the fuck? Kids can do that? One day, they're all about the naps and the next. . . ?

Other than the two nights we had when Charlie was with Em and Rose, we hadn't had sex at all. We had just about given up on doing it when he was there, because we were afraid of him interrupting.

"Bella, we gotta do something about this," I said seriously as I stared down at our little boy sleeping between us. "I can't stand not being able to touch you at night."

"What do you want me to do? I can take him back to his own room, but he'll just be back here in an hour anyway."

That's the way it had been. In one night, I replaced him into his bed no less than five times before I gave up and just let him stay.

"I think we need to talk to the pediatrician. This can't be normal. Do you know how fucking awkward it is to wake up with a boner when your kid's lying next to you?"

Bella snorted. "No, Edward, I really don't."

"Don't laugh," I protested. "This is serious shit."

"It's a stage, Edward. He'll grow out of it."

"How do you know?" I worried.

Bella sighed and reached for my hand. "I don't. I'm completely guessing."

"You're killing me, baby," I groaned. "At this point, I'm ready to try and make a go of it in the hour that it takes him to get back here."

"Are you really that desperate?"

"To get inside of you? Always," I nodded. "We're not an old married couple, Bella. We should be doing it every day, not once a week."

Bella burst out laughing and then covered her mouth with her hand when Charlie stirred. "Every day? I think you might be delusional, sweetie. We may be young, but I think once a day might be pushing it a little."

"I'm not delusional, I'm fucking horny," I huffed. "I walk around with a fucking boner all day long whether you're with me or not. I think about you and _BAM_, I get hard. We've done it more than once a day before."

"Uh, yeah, but not every day."

"Whatever. Point is, I like to touch you. I want to feel you. I can't do that when there's a three and half year old between us. I feel like a creep."

Bella offered me a sweet smile and then jerked her head. "Come over to my side."

I stared at her for a minute trying to figure out what she was saying.

"Behind me, Edward. This side of the bed."

I gaped at her.

"You're not getting lucky," she laughed, reading my expression perfectly. "But you can cuddle with me. And when you wake up, you're boner will only be between you and me."

I was out of bed and on her side faster than she could blink. I didn't want her to change her mind. Not that I really thought she would. She liked me close as much as I liked to be close to her.

She gently moved Charlie over so that I could fit in behind her. I threw my arm over her waist, buried my nose in her hair, inhaled lavender and vanilla and fell asleep about forty-five seconds later.

XXXXXXX

A few days before Christmas, Bella and I left Charlie with my parents and headed to Seattle with Jasper, Alice, Rose, and Emmett. We were all doing last minute Christmas shopping. It was easy enough to find some things in Port Angeles, but not everything. And I still had no idea what I was going to get for Bella.

I'd gotten her several little things, but I had no idea what to get her for a big gift and she'd made me promise not to spend more than a couple hundred bucks. I probably would have completely ignored her request if I hadn't known that she was using her own money to buy me a gift and I knew that she couldn't afford a whole lot.

We separated from the rest of the group, agreeing to meet up at California Pizza Kitchen for lunch.

"I need to get some stocking stuffers," Bella said on our way back into the mall after our second trip to drop off bags to the car.

I looked at her blankly.

"For Charlie's Christmas stocking, Edward. You know, Santa Clause needs to come visit and all that."

"Oh."

"Did you think that Santa would really come and fill his stocking for him?" Bella giggled.

_I am a complete idiot._

I'd never really thought about it. Here I was twenty-three years old and every Christmas for my entire life I'd gotten a stocking. I mean, I'd always known it was my parents; well from about nine- years-old on I did, but it just never crossed my mind that they actually had to put thought into it ahead of time.

"So. . . is Santa visiting the apartment and the house? Cause I know my parents are definitely getting a visit."

"I hadn't thought about that," she frowned.

_At least I'm not the only one._

"Um, yeah, I guess. I want Charlie to wake up and see that he visited, not have to wait until we're dressed and ready to go over to the house."

I shrugged. "Okay. What kind of things do you get for a kid's stocking?"

We spent the next half- hour buying knick knacks and thingy-ma-bobs for Charlie.

I was starting to panic about what to get Bella. She must have already had my present though, because she seemed completely relaxed. She was drinking a caramel macchiato and holding my hand, swinging our arms like a couple of kids when her phone rang.

We stopped and she set her coffee down on a bench to answer.

"Hello? Yeah. Almost. We've just been getting stuff for Charlie's stocking. Huh? Really? No, I didn't know that. Yeah, thanks. Twenty minutes. Okay, bye."

"What's happening?" I asked.

"Alice says we're supposed to get stuff to fill each other's stockings too." Bella picked up her coffee again and took a drink.

_Oh, this is too easy._

"Don't worry, baby, I was planning on filling your stocking," I smirked.

Bella choked. "Jesus, Edward."

She tried to pull away from me, but I refused to let go of her hand, instead I gripped it tighter and pulled her to me. In an instant, her back was against the railing, my hands on either side of her, caging her in.

"Edward," Bella hissed. "Everybody's looking at us."

I glanced around. She was right, almost everyone who passed by us was staring.

"I don't care. It's not like I'm molesting you." I grinned. "I can if you want me to though."

"Funny," she scowled. "Come on, let's go get some lunch. I'm sure we can get stuff to fill each other's stocking later."

I just kept smiling at her, running my tongue over my teeth. I wasn't going to let her go until I broke her. She was going to smile or we'd stay where we were all day. She pulled her lip into her mouth and I knew I had her.

_Three. . .two. . .one. . ._

"Okay!" she laughed.

I chuckled in triumph and kissed her nose before releasing her.

When we got home that afternoon Bella picked up the mail and brought it inside. She was reading something when I entered the kitchen.

"What's that? A Christmas letter?" I asked, glancing over her shoulder.

"Uh, yeah, sort of," she said softly.

I looked at it briefly before grabbing the rest of the mail.

Hold up. Is that. . . ?

I leaned back over and looked at the letter again. I scanned the first few sentences.

_Motherfucker!_

Bella turned her head to look at my face, which was only inches from hers.

"What the fuck, Bella?"

"Calm down. Here," she said, handing me the letter. "Read the whole thing."

Part of me wanted to rip it up instead of reading it, but something told me that my girl would not appreciate that.

_Dear Bella,_

_I'm hoping that by even starting to read this letter that means you might be willing to read the whole thing and just hear me out. I'm not writing to cause any trouble. It's just that, this is Christmas. I haven't missed a Christmas in four years._

_I've been thinking a lot lately. Ever since our talk in the coffee shop a couple months ago, I've been trying to figure things out. Trying to pinpoint exactly where I went wrong. Where we went wrong. I couldn't really figure it out though. I suppose it was when we took our friendship to a place that it shouldn't have gone. Yes, I admit that now. It shouldn't have gone there, but it did, and I don't know how to go back to what we were._

_We've already talked about a lot of this and I don't want to dwell on it. But I hope that someday, we can get past this. Maybe someday, we can figure out how to be friends again. That you and Edward can forgive me for the horrible words I've said to you both. It was only recently that I figured out that by saying the things I did to Edward, that all I was doing was hurting you. Metaphorically kicking you when you were already down._

_There is no excuse, but I hope that Edward can put himself in my shoes for just a moment and realize that I was angry and desperate and clearly not thinking of the consequences of my words and actions._

_Please believe me when I say that I want you to be happy and I know now that Edward really is the only one who can do that for you. As much as I tried to ignore it, the moment you told me that Charlie called him daddy, I knew that you would only ever be his._

_I have sent a little gift for Charlie. I am hoping that you'll let him have it. It's nothing big. It's that build your own wooden train set that he asked me for before you moved back to Forks. It says 5+ on the box, but I figured if he had help building it that it would be okay._

_I know you said that you didn't want to tell him that I loved him because it would confuse him, but I do. Just let him know that I'm thinking about him. Please. That's all I'm asking._

_I hope that you guys have a Merry Christmas._

_Love, Riley._

I held the letter tightly in my hands and looked over at Bella. Her eyes were watery and the moment our gazes met, they overflowed, dripping down her cheeks.

"I really fucked that up," she sobbed.

I set the letter down, pulling her to me with one arm while my other hand pinched the bridge of my nose. As much as I wanted to hate the guy, I sort of understood. If she had chosen him over me, I would have been a complete douche as well.

My feelings towards Riley were completely conflicted. It wasn't his fault that things worked out the way that they did. I couldn't blame him for falling in love with her. Not really. He had taken care of her when I couldn't. He had been there for Charlie. And that's where the conflict came in. I hated that he had been there. I hated that he was there for those four Christmases and I wasn't.

I didn't tell her that it would all work out, because I didn't know if it would. I still didn't want him hanging around. Despite what he wrote, I didn't trust him. Maybe someday things would be different, but not now.

"Can we give Charlie the train?" she sniffed.

"Yeah, I think that'd be fine," I conceded, kissing her head.

Later on that night, after Charlie had gone to sleep, Bella and I settled down on the sofa.

My head was in her lap and she was unconsciously playing with my hair as we watched a movie. Well, Bella was watching the movie. I was lying on my back with my eyes closed. It felt so good to have her fingers gently running through the strands, sometimes tugging on them, sometimes scratching her nails against my scalp.

"Is your dad coming over on Saturday?" I asked

"No. He has to work Christmas morning. Everyone else has spouses or younger children so he volunteered," she responded. She was trying to hide her disappointment, but I could hear it in her voice.

I couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if we hadn't been here. Would he have had to work, leaving Bella and Charlie to celebrate all on their own? Would they have spent it with Riley? He said he'd never missed a Christmas.

_MotherfuckingGodDamnit. Stop thinking about that shit._

"Did he have to work last year too?" It was the easiest way to ask without really asking. I opened my eyes to see her reaction.

She nodded. "Yeah, he did, but Leland actually covered until ten so dad got to spend the morning with us. Then Charlie and I went to the Reservation and had dinner with Jake and Billy over at Sue's house. It was nice."

"Are you going to miss them this year? Do you want to head over there after dinner?"

Bella smiled. "My dad said he'd be off by five and wants us to come over. I'm sure he'd love to have Jake and Billy over for a small get together. I think Jake's going to ask Claire to marry him."

I looked up at her. "Already? They've only been dating a few months, haven't they?"

Bella chuckled. "Yeah. He said he doesn't want to wait, he knows he wants her forever so there's no point."

"Wow."

I had nothing more to say. Is that all it took to propose? I knew that I wanted Bella forever, but was I ready to pop the question? I already called her my wife to people who didn't know any better, but if I asked her, would she say yes? Fuck, that was a big step. It would happen, I knew that, but now? Six months ago we were screaming at each other; expressing our anger and pain, intent on causing hurt. We had come so far, but was it far enough?

The thoughts were completely swamping my mind. It must have shown on my face, because I felt Bella's thumb rubbing my forehead between my eyes.

"What's got you so concerned?" she asked softly.

"Huh?"

"You're frowning and look kinda constipated."

I laughed. "Shut up."

She bent down, peppering my face with little pecks before pressing a firm, but chaste kiss against my mouth. In that moment, all my insecurities seemed to vanish.

"Do you wanna go to bed and fool around a little before our perfect little cockblock wakes up?" I asked, flashing her my crooked smile.

"Maybe he'll sleep through tonight?" I think she meant it as a statement, but her face told me she had absolutely no confidence that it might happen.

I wrinkled my nose. "Maybe. You wanna see how far we can get?"

Bella jumped up, letting my head hit the sofa as she ran back to our room, stripping her clothes from her body on the way.

"You're gonna regret that," I threatened playfully as I strode purposefully after her.

Sure enough, we were interrupted not twenty minutes later, just as Bella's hand had made its way into my boxer shorts.

"God damnit!" I groaned, hanging my head in frustration. But when I saw my son, wrapped in his mother's arms, sniffling and with tears dripping down his cheeks, I couldn't stay that way.

I reached out. "Give him here," I mumbled, scooting back so that I was sitting up against the headboard.

Bella handed him to me. He reminded me of one of those baby orangutans at the zoo the way he clung to me.

"What's the matter, buddy," I whispered, stroking his hair as Bella climbed back into bed.

"I'm scared," he whimpered.

"Of what?" I glanced over at Bella but she shrugged her shoulders and shook her head.

"Of da monsters."

"Monsters? What monsters?"

"Da ones dat got me."

"Buddy, there's no such things as monsters."

"Uh huh."

"Charlie," I said holding him tightly. "I promise you, no monsters are going to get you, okay?"

He sniffed loudly and shook his head, effectively wiping snot all over my bare chest. Gross.

Bella giggle-snorted and handed me my t-shirt that was at the bottom of the bed.

"You need to try and sleep in your own bed, buddy," I tried.

Charlie shook his head 'no'.

"Would it make you feel better if I slept in there with you?"

Charlie lifted his head, looking at me with sad, tired, little eyes. Then he nodded.

I took a deep breath.

_Guess I'm sleeping on the floor tonight._

XXXXXX

The next two nights we were actually able to get Charlie to stay in his room. Of course, the first night Bella spent about three quarters of the night in his bed with him and the second night I had to sit in the rocking chair next to him until after midnight. I tried to get up three times, but each time, regardless of how quiet I thought I was being, he startled and started crying.

Christmas Eve, Emmett and Rosalie as well as Jasper and Alice came down to spend the night. We all went to the ten o'clock Christmas church service along with Chief Swan and by the time we got home, Charlie was fast asleep.

Bella slowly peeled off his little suit and put on his pajamas, careful not to wake him. He did wake up while we were trying to put the presents under the tree, but Bella was able to coax him back to sleep while I filled her stocking; the actual, not the metaphorical.

Alice had suggested that I fill it with little scented candles and chocolates. I also added some bath soaps and some Chapstick because she was always chewing on her lip and I wanted to make sure it stayed soft and. . . well, un-chapped.

In the morning, I woke first. The sun was just starting to peak through the curtains. Bella was on her back, one arm above her head, eyes closed, eyelids fluttering.

And there was no little body between us. Or anywhere in the bed.

I turned onto my side, letting my hand glide over her stomach. She shifted slightly in an attempt to get a little closer to me.

"Mmmm."

"Are you awake?" I murmured.

"No."

I grinned and rubbed myself against her leg. "I am."

She giggled. "I can feel that."

I pressed my lips against her shoulder. "Merry Christmas, gorgeous girl."

She rolled herself over to face me. "Hi."

Resting my forehead against hers, I breathed her in. Even first thing in the morning she smelled so good.

"Do you want me to go make some coffee?" I asked, brushing her hair away from her face.

"Yes, please," she mumbled, burying her face into the pillow.

I reluctantly pulled myself out of my soft warm bed and got up to start the coffee pot. By the time it was finished, Bella had walked in, carrying Charlie in her arms. I got him a sippy cup of milk and took him from Bella so that she could get her mug.

"Hey, big man, Merry Christmas," I smiled.

"Hi, daddy," he yawned.

"Has he seen?" I mouthed. Bella shook her head, smiling.

"Come on, buddy, let's go into the living room."

I set Charlie down and he followed me out of the kitchen rubbing his eyes. When he opened them fully, it seemed to take him a minute to really see the sight in front of him. His eyes quickly went wide, his mouth dropping.

"Woooow!"

I threw my head back in silent laughter.

"You must have been a very good boy this year for Santa to bring you all this stuff," Bella said dramatically. I don't think Charlie was listening to her though. His eyes were set on the wooden train table that was all set up with the track and the trains.

"Is dat for me?" he asked in amazement.

"I think so, buddy," I nodded. "Unless you think Santa brought it for me!"

Charlie looked at me for a minute, confusion on his face before he grinned.

"Noooo, daddy. Santa Cwaus brought it for me."

Bella laughed and sat down on the sofa. I sat down next to her, resting my hand on her thigh. "Do you want to do this now and then head over?"

"Yeah," she nodded.

We watched as Charlie ripped open his gifts from us. Each one got about five seconds worth of attention before he moved on.

Bella and I opened our gifts. Little things like CD's and books. And then she handed me another.

"A Kindle?" I said, smiling. I'd been wanting one for months, but never got around to buying one.

"I thought that maybe you could download some of your medical textbooks on it so you could study anywhere without having to lug around ten pound books."

I leaned over and kissed her softly. "Thank you, baby, I love it."

She scratched her chin and bit her nail. "I've, um, I've got something else for you, but I thought I'd give it to you later?"

I smirked. "Really?"

She nodded and bit her lip.

"I look forward to it then," I winked.

I nervously handed Bella my gift. After lamenting to my mother about not knowing what to get her, she explained to me that Bella was the type of girl who valued something from the heart more than something new, flashy or expensive.

After I asked her how the hell that was supposed to help me, I followed her into her bedroom while she retrieved a box from her closet. Inside, were dozens of pieces of jewelry. Necklaces, earrings; even My Grandma Masen's engagement and wedding rings.

"If you want to get her something such as jewelry, may I suggest you go with an heirloom?" she asked. "This all was left to you kids when your grandmother passed. Alice has chosen what she wanted and I figured you boys wouldn't be interested in it just yet."

But it wasn't the jewelry that caught my attention, at least not for immediate use.

Bella opened up the package. "Edward, it's beautiful."

"Do you like it?" I asked quietly.

"Oh, I love it," she whispered.

It was the box that held all the jewelry that I was fascinated by. It was solid mahogany about 12x12, with a red velvet lining. It had been hand-made by my grandfather Masen. He gave it to my Grandmother on their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary to hold all of her keepsakes in. It was in perfect condition. On the inside of the lid, on a small silver plaque was the inscription.

To my darling Elizabeth,

There are no words that

can adequately express my

love and devotion for you, my wife.

You are my everything.

~Henry~

Underneath that plaque, was one that I had commissioned from a keepsakes shop in Port Angeles. They were nice enough to inscribe and install the plate in the same day.

My beautiful Bella,

I've been waiting for you for so long

You have given me love

You have given me life

Everything that I am belongs to you

~Edward~

Bella wiped her eyes and sniffled a little. I pulled her into my lap and dragged my nose up the side of her cheek kissing her temple before nuzzling into her neck.

"I love you so much, baby. Merry Christmas."

Bella wrapped her arms around my chest. "I love you too, Edward. Thank you, this. . . this means more to me than you know."

We continued to sit like that as Charlie played with his toys. There was wrapping paper everywhere, but neither Bella nor I could be bothered picking it up.

And then Bella pulled out the package from Riley.

"Um, Charlie," she started. "There's another present for you. It's from Riley."

"Is he coming?" Charlie asked, eyes wide.

Bella smiled sadly. "No, baby, he couldn't come, but he sent you a present to let you know that he's thinking about you."

"Where is he?"

"He's in Seattle."

"Why?"

"Because that's where he lives."

"Oh. That's where we wived too, right, mommy?"

"Yes, Charlie. That's where we used to live."

"But daddy didn't wiv wif us."

"No, but he lives with us now."

I saw Bella take in a deep breath.

"Why don't you open the present, Charlie," I nudged.

Charlie ripped open the paper and grinned as he saw what it was. "It's a train. I wike trains, mommy."

"I know you do, baby. Maybe we can draw him a picture to say thank you. What do you think?"

"Okay. I can draw him a picture of da train."

"I think he'd like that."

I saw Bella tearing up again and squeezed her hand. She smiled back at me before standing up.

"You ready to go to Gramma and Papa's house?" she asked, rubbing her eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Charlie said, jumping up and down.

We all dressed quickly and made our way out the door.

When we got to the house, Bella opened the door and Charlie bolted ahead down the hallway. We heard a huge squeal before we even stepped foot over the threshold. I chuckled and set down the armload of presents I had in my hands.

I knew that Christmas morning in the Cullen household was always insane. I knew that my parents were most likely going to spoil Charlie. But this was a whole new level.

Bella's mouth stopped mid-sentence, hanging open in shock. Then I heard her teeth come together violently, her jaw clenching.

I wrapped my arm around her waist. I had no idea if she was going to be upset by this and I wanted to calm her before the shit hit the fan.

"Are you fucking kidding me," she said in complete shock. Her head turned and she looked at me. "Seriously? Edward, this is out of control."

I grimaced, taking in the scene in front of me. She was right, it really was complete overkill.

There must have been two hundred presents sitting under and around that tree. There were even presents in the tree. Charlie was rooting around looking at all the ones that were not wrapped. Jasper was bent down next to him pointing at things and talking to him.

"Uh. . ."

"Hi guys," Alice smiled, coming out of the kitchen. "Merry Christmas."

She hugged first me and then Bella. When she stepped back she frowned. "What's the matter?"

"What's the matter?" Bella echoed, not looking away from the living room.

Alice turned around. "Oh, yeah, I know. It didn't look quite this bad when it was just mom and dad's presents, but when we unloaded ours and Em and Rose unloaded theirs, it just kinda exploded."

"Kinda exploded?"

"Wow, Bella. Do you need some coffee this morning?" Alice teased.

I squeezed Bella's side and she shook her head as if she were coming out of a daze.

"Yes, coffee would be good."

Alice turned around. "Mom and Dad are in the kitchen. Rose and Em are still. . . in their room."

Alice wrinkled her nose and I did the same. Gross. She then reached out her hand, calling for Charlie who galloped over to her, before disappearing into the kitchen.

Jasper stood up from where he had been and lazily strolled towards us. "Merry Christmas, sugar," he smiled, landing a kiss on Bella's cheek. "Edward."

"Jasper," I greeted, giving him a one armed hug and a slap on the back. "Isn't Mama Whitlock all up in arms that you're spendin Christmas Day down here your first year back?"

Jasper laughed. "She's alright. She understands. Besides, we're headin over there tonight until Tuesday. She'll have plenty of time to harass us about grandbabies."

I chuckled. Jasper made eye contact with me and then tilted his head slightly towards Bella.

"You okay, baby?" I asked, tucking a strand of hair that had escaped her ponytail behind her ear.

"This is just a lot to take in," she smiled sadly, biting her lip. "I mean, I know everyone is trying to make up for time lost, but I just don't. . . I don't want to sound ungrateful or unappreciative, but this is way too much, Edward. Charlie doesn't need all this. He needs us, his family, not a mountain of presents. Last year I think he got a total of seven presents. I'm afraid to even ask how many of those are for him."

_Probably well over half._

"I know, baby," I tried to soothe. "Just give them this year and I promise that next year, we'll go more low key, okay?"

I understood Bella's hesitance. She was around a lot when we were kids, but never on Christmas day. She never saw the madness that ensued. There were two times a year that my parents really bought us things, Christmas and birthdays. We got a more than decent allowance that enabled us to buy what we wanted, but those two days, we were spoiled rotten. I guess I couldn't really be surprised that they'd do the same for Charlie.

Unfortunately, that's not how Bella's family did things. She was raised by a single parent who was a public servant. She had been bringing Charlie up as a single mother and a student. No wonder this scared the shit out of her.

I groaned and ran my hand through my hair. "I'm sorry, Bella."

"Don't be sorry," she chuckled. "I'm not mad. It's just a little. . . shocking. I don't think I've seen this many presents in my lifetime, much less in the same place at the same time."

"If it makes you feel any better, I bet the majority of my parent's gifts are educational."

Bella laughed. "That makes me feel a little bit better. Thank you."

I walked Bella to the kitchen and when we entered we were greeted by the sounds and smells of Christmas morning. My mom was making waffles. There were freshly baked blueberry and chocolate scones and cinnamon rolls.

"Did you get up at three this morning, Mom?" I asked.

"No. I did not," she said shaking a fork at me. "Merry Christmas, sweetheart," she smiled, pulling me to her.

"Merry Christmas Ma," I grinned back.

"Bella, honey, Merry Christmas."

Bella's response was muffled by my mother smothering her in tight hug.

"Santa Cwaus comed to my house too," Charlie told Carlisle animatedly.

"He did?" Carlisle said, his eyes wide in feigned surprise. He finished buttering the scone in his hand and handed it to his grandson.

Charlie took a big bit. "Uh huh. Hefphbrinkmeprethnts."

"Charlie!" Bella scolded. "Don't talk with your mouth full."

Charlie held his hand in front of his mouth and spit his partially chewed scone into it.

I wrinkled my nose in disgust and laughed at the same time.

"He bringed me presents," Charlie said clearly now that his mouth was empty.

"I've gave birth to an animal," Bella mumbled, shaking her head.

Carlisle took the disgusting mess from Charlie and handed it to my mom, who was holding out a paper towel for him.

He leaned in real close to Charlie. "Next time you can finish swallowing it, son," he whispered. "I'll wait."

Charlie nodded and took another bite, making a big show that he was chewing and swallowing. Everybody laughed.

"Merry ho ho ho!" Emmett said loudly as he entered the room with Rose following behind him.

"Das what Santa Cwaus says," Charlie beamed. "Ho ho ho."

Emmett ruffled his hair. "It sure is. I saw all those presents in there. Do you think any of them are for you?"

Charlie nodded frantically. "Dere's an airpwane and a big truck. Aaaaaand, somefing else." He bit his lip and furrowed his eyebrows. "I can't remember."

"Well, let's go look," Emmett said scooping him up off the chair. "Are we ready to do this?" He turned to look at the rest of us.

Everyone nodded, grabbing plates of food and coffee before heading into the living room.

For the next hour and a half it was a whirlwind of cheery music, flying paper, laughs, giggles, squeals, kisses and hugs.

The morning was absolutely perfect.

XXXXXX

BPOV

Charlie's haul was ridiculous, but not as bad as I expected. There were a lot of individually wrapped books and CD's of kid's music. Alice and Jasper got him this really cool Imaginext Batman Cave with all the bits and bobs that went along with it. Edward looked almost as excited as Charlie did opening that one.

Emmett and Rose got him a soccer ball and net, as well as a basketball and one of those plastic basket ball hoops that can get bigger as he does.

"When you get a little bit bigger, we'll get one installed in Gramma and Papa's back yard, okay?"

I shoved my thumb nail into my mouth and started chewing on it. I looked over at Edward. He must have felt my gaze on him because he met my eyes and winked. He was reassuring me that everything would be alright. He knew what I was thinking. We didn't know if we were staying in Washington or going back east. Regardless, we wouldn't be in Forks.

_How on Earth are they going to take it if we leave? They had to have known that it was a possibility. . . . right?_

I was distracted by my thoughts when Carlisle set a package down in front of me with a thud.

"What the heck is this, a lead weight?" I laughed.

"Something like that," Esme grinned. "We thought you and Edward could use this."

Edward stood up and came to sit next to me and Charlie flopped down in his lap.

"Oh my goodness," I gasped as I peeled the paper back, revealing a top of the line double shot espresso machine.

"Excellent," Edward moaned, gently caressing the box.

I used my thumb to wipe his chin.

"What?" he asked, confused, wiping his sleeve over his chin.

"Just thought I'd help you with the drool," I joked. "Do you two need a moment alone?"

Edward pushed my shoulder. "Zip it woman, you know you're just as orgasmic over this thing as I am."

"Was ogasmic?"

I glared at Edward, my lips twitching. "It means happy, baby," I explained. "If we get called into his preschool because he tells his teacher how orgasmic he is, you're in trouble," I whispered.

Edward snickered.

I watched as Esme opened our gift.

"Oh!" she gasped. "Oh, my. Oh, this is. . ."

Esme teared up as Carlisle stood up and unfolded the blanket. I had made a collage of Charlie's pictures from the day he was born up until a few weeks ago and sent them into a company that had it printed onto a blanket. It may not have been exceptionally practical, but I knew that they'd love it.

"Now I have my beautiful grandbaby's face all the time," she fawned. "Thank you so much."

She leaned over and hugged me and then Edward.

Once all the gifts were exchanged, the women retreated to the kitchen to uphold our end of the holiday cooking bargain. Esme prepared two honey-baked hams while we worked on getting all the side dishes ready.

We sat down to good food, good wine, and good company, stuffed ourselves completely and then we disappeared down into the basement while the men cleaned up.

Later on that evening, we made our way to my dad's house. Billy, Jake and Claire were already there with Pizza and beer.

"My kind of family," Edward laughed, accepting a beer and a man hug from my dad.

Claire was standing off to the side, shifting her weight from foot to foot nervously. One look and I knew.

"Let me see it," I grinned.

She didn't hesitate. She threw her hand forward. Jake had outdone himself. It wasn't the biggest diamond in the world, but it was so clear. Perfect for Claire's tiny little hands.

"Oh my God!" I squealed hugging her tightly while my dad and Edward congratulated Jake. I turned and threw myself into his arms. "I can't believe you're getting married," I mumbled into his collar.

"I know, me neither," he chuckled.

"Do you know when? Have you talked about it yet?"

"I don't know," Claire shook her head. "It's gonna be small, on the beach so maybe once it warms up a little outside."

"Oh, that's gonna be so beautiful, I can't wait."

After we ate, we sat down in the living room and exchanged gifts. This time, it was much more subdued. Jake had made Charlie a dream catcher.

"That keeps the monsters away," he said, looking at me.

"It does?" Charlie asked, wide eyed.

"Yup. No more monsters."

My dad disappeared for a moment and rolled out a police car three wheeled tricycle with a big bow on the top.

"Wow," Charlie said, jumping up and sitting down on the trike. "Dis is cool."

By the time we headed for home, Charlie was zonked. He had spent the entire evening "driving" his police car all over the house making these extremely annoying "woo woo woo" sounds. I sarcastically thanked my father before kissing everyone goodbye and wishing them a Merry Christmas.

Edward put Charlie into bed, making sure to hang the dream catcher from the post, while I got ready for bed. I stripped down to my underwear and put on a button up pajama shirt.

I felt Edward's arms surround me and leaned back a little.

"I'll be right back," I whispered, before heading into the closet.

When I came back out, Edward was sitting on the end of the bed. He was still wearing his jeans, but they hung open at the zipper and his chest was bare.

He had a lazy smile on his face and was leaning back onto his hands.

It was definitely time for his last present.

XXXXXXXXXXX

"Here," Bella said in an uncharacteristically shy voice, handing me a flat box covered in blue wrapping paper with silver snowflakes on it.

"What's this?" I asked, completely confused.

"It's a Christmas present, Edward," she snorted. "Open it."

"Why am I opening it now?"

"Because I want you to."

"Is it something dirty?" I asked, waggling my eyebrows at her and sticking my tongue out through my teeth.

She smacked my arm, giggling nervously. "Just open it."

I carefully removed the paper, aware that Bella was watching my every move. Whatever it was, it was important.

There was simple box and I opened it and pulled out what looked like a picture frame.

I stared at the frame, my brain trying to process what I was looking at.

"Is this real?" I asked tentatively, looking up at Bella.

"It's absolutely real," she smiled.

"He's mine?" I whispered, tracing my finger over his name.

"He's always been yours, Edward," Bella said gently.

"But. . .but legally? He's mine legally?"

In my periphery I could see Bella nodding her head. "He's yours in every way possible."

"When did you get this?"

"A couple of weeks ago. I wanted to surprise you."

I was completely speechless. It was like everything slowed down until time just stopped. I couldn't breathe. The knot in my throat was so tight, I couldn't swallow.

Charles Anthony Swan Cullen.

Mother: Isabella Marie Swan.

Father: Edward Anthony Cullen.

My baby. My child. My son. He was mine. Nobody would ever again question who his father was.

I felt Bella's hand on my cheek and it was only then that I realized that I was crying. My vision blurred as a big fat tear dripped down to the tip of my nose and fell, splashing against the glass.

"Are you happy?" Bella asked softly.

I opened my mouth but no words came out. I took in a deep, wobbly breath. "Baby, this is. . . this is, hands down, the best gift I have ever gotten in my entire life." I choked back whatever it was that was in my throat and looked up, meeting her eyes and watched them light up as a grin the size of Texas appeared.

"Really?"

I lunged forward, wrapping my hand around the back of her neck and smashing my mouth against hers.

I continued to hold the frame in my hand as Bella responded eagerly. I didn't want to put it down. I didn't want to let it go just in case it disappeared. But it was real. Bella said he was mine in every way. No one could take that away from me.

Our mouths were working frantically against each other, teeth clashing, tongues intertwining. I glanced over and reluctantly let go of the birth certificate. Right now I needed to show this woman how much I loved her; how much I cherished her. I needed to make sure that she never, ever had a doubt in her mind that I was hers and she was mine and one day, hopefully soon, she would be my wife.

I pulled my hand back and placed it on her cheek. Our kisses became slower, less frantic. I rested my forehead against hers. Our eyes bore into each other, like our souls were merging together.

"Make love to me," I whispered.

Bella didn't answer with words. Instead, her hand moved to her shirt, unbuttoning the top few buttons. I sat back on my knees and allowed her to finish. When she was done, her shirt lay slightly open, revealing a path of skin from her neck, down between her breasts, and over her navel. She wore simple white cotton panties and she had never before looked so beautiful and so sexy. One of her legs was bent and I ran my hand along her soft skin from her ankle, over her knee and up her thigh.

"There is nothing in this world that I desire more than you," I murmured, leaning back over her and placing soft kisses along her jaw and beneath her ear.

I peeled back one side of her shirt, exposing her breast. Her nipple immediately hardened, begging me for some affection. I balanced my weight onto my forearm and cupped her breast, passing my thumb over the tip a few times. Bella's chest was rising and falling quickly as her breathing sped up. She gasped when I pinched the little bud lightly and rolled it between my fingertips.

"I love the way your body responds to me," I smiled at her. I felt her hands in my hair and a little pressure as she tried to encourage my mouth a little further south. I chuckled, but obliged, taking her nipple in between my lips and then massaging it with my tongue.

Bella whimpered.

"What do you want, baby," I asked, trailing my hand down her ribcage to the edge of her panties. I ran my finger back and forth between the fabric and her skin.

"I just want you," she sighed.

I'd give her everything I had. She was my love; my life. "You have me," I whispered.

I finished slipping off her shirt and leaned back on my heels so that I could remove her panties. She put one of her feet against my chest and lifted her hips as I slipped them down her smooth legs, leaving her bare beneath me.

I took off my pants and boxers and leaned back over her. I slid into her tight, wet, warmth, watching her eyes roll back into her head and a beautiful smile grace her lips.

I pushed her hands up above her head and she grabbed the slats of the headboard. Wrapping my hands around hers, I rocked into her. Against her. With her.

I felt everything. It was like I was tripping on acid without all the swirling colors. My whole body was hypersensitive to her. The feel of her hardened nipples against my own, every internal spasm sent me closer and closer to the edge.

_Marry me._

I didn't say the words out loud. I held them in. It wasn't the time. Not with everything going on. Not with the fucking stalker still out there. Not on the day that her friend proposed to his girl. I was selfish. I didn't want to share that moment with anyone else.

Bella's breath caught, her back arched upwards and her teeth wrenched down on her lower lip as she tried to silence the sounds of her orgasm.

In less than a week, she wouldn't have to. We'd be in a condo in the Rocky Mountains, surrounded by snow, trees, and people we'd never see again. She could be as loud as she wanted.

I grunted through my release, emptying completely inside of her. I rolled off of her, enveloping her into my arms.

"I love you, Edward."

"I love you too, Bella."

_Marry me._

XXXXXXXX

"What is the matter with her?"

"She's just emotional, son. Let her have her moment."

I looked at my watch. "It's been ten minutes."

Carlisle chuckled.

"Look at his face."

Carlisle laughed harder.

"I've got to do something about this. He's going to think something's wrong."

I had just shown my parents Charlie's birth certificate. Carlisle was thrilled seeing his last name on that document. He hugged me and told me how proud he was.

My mom? Well, my mom was suddenly rendered insane. She broke down. . .completely. She was currently sitting on the sofa, bawling her eyes out, holding Charlie on her lap, her arm around Bella, rocking back and forth, back and forth.

Bella had teared up at first, but now she looked almost scared. Charlie looked confused and slightly irritated.

I walked over and bent down in front of them. "Mom?"

Her red, swollen eyes met mine and she grinned. "I'm so happy for you," she choked out.

"I know you are, ma, but. . . you have to let go, now."

Charlie reached for me and I was able to snatch him from my mother's grip only to see her wrap that arm around Bella's other shoulder, drawing her into a tight embrace.

"Help. Me," Bella mouthed, silently, over my mom's shoulder. Her eyes were wide and pleading.

Carlisle's laughter was no longer contained.

"Es, honey, why don't you let Bella go and we can start lunch," he said. He pried her fingers from Bella's shoulders and helped her up, directing her towards the kitchen.

"OhmyGod," Bella said, exasperated.

"Why's Gramma so sad?" Charlie asked, frowning.

"She's not sad, buddy, she's happy."

He bit his lip. "But she's crying."

"Sometimes people cry when they're happy," Bella sighed.

"I cry when I'm sad."

"Yes, you do, but Gramma's happy," I promised.

"Weeellll, why's she happy?"

I looked at Bella.

_How do we explain this?_

Bella shrugged.

"Charlie, do you know what your name is?"

He looked at me with a '_duh_' look on his face. The one that reminded me so much of Bella. I laughed.

_My kid is a fucking smartass. At three. Go figure. _

"Can you tell me what your whole name is?" I asked, smiling.

He blew out a long breath. "Charles. Anfony. Swan," he said with a nod.

"That's right. And my name is Edward. Anthony. Cullen."

"You have Anfony, just like me!" Charlie said excitedly.

"I do. And do you know what? You know that piece of paper that your mommy was showing Gramma and Papa?"

He nodded.

"That paper says that you also have Cullen on the end of your name, just like me."

Charlie looked contemplative for a moment and then frowned. "Um, I'm not Charlie anymore?"

"No," I chuckled. "You're still Charlie, but now you're Charles Anthony Swan Cullen."

"Oh. Okay. I'm hungry."

Bella giggled. "Go in and see if Gramma has lunch ready, baby."

I set Charlie down and he ran towards the kitchen. "Do you think he understood that at all?"

"You did a great job, Edward. He'll get it."

"That's a long fucking name. How's he ever going to learn to write that?"

Bella smiled widely. "I suppose as long as he can spell Charlie and Cullen, we're all good."

I leaned forward, resting my forehead against hers. "Thank you," I whispered.

"My pleasure," she whispered back.

XXXXXXX

"Come on, Bella, we gotta go!" I shouted as I put the last bag into the car.

I looked over to see her with a death grip on Charlie. He squirmed a little and I could see he was losing patience with his crazy mother. I jogged over and pried him from her clutches.

"You be good for Gramma and Papa, okay, buddy?"

"Okay, Daddy."

"I love you." I said, giving him a hug.

"I love you too." I felt his arms tighten and squeeze me. They shook a little from the force he was putting into it and I chuckled.

I set him down and he slipped his hand into my mom's. My heart stuttered a little at the thought that I it would be a week before I felt his little arms around me again, but I pushed it back. If I lost any semblance of control, I would never get Bella out of there.

"He'll be fine, Bella," mom soothed, kissing her cheek. "Go. Enjoy yourself."

Bella nodded, but her face looked pale and her eyes were sad.

I wrapped my arm around her waist. "Baby, we have got to get on the road or we're going to miss our flight," I urged.

She reluctantly let me turn her towards the car. I opened up the door and she got in.

_Maybe I should lock the door until I get in so she doesn't try to escape._

I chuckled at my crazy thoughts. I'd definitely be in trouble if I did that. The last thing I wanted to do was piss off my woman when we were about to spend six days alone. I had extended the original gift that my parents had given Bella by two nights because that's how long the party that canceled had it for and the resort wouldn't give it to me any other way. I was okay with that, but it seemed to make Bella panic a little.

About twenty minutes outside of Forks, Bella gasped. "I think I forgot my swimsuit. You said there was a pool, right? And a hot tub? I'll need my swimsuit."

"You didn't forget your swim suit, Bella. I watched you pack it," I said, shaking my head. "Besides, we don't really need swimsuits." I turned my head and smirked at her.

She looked slightly panicked.

"He'll be perfectly fine with my parents," I sighed.

"I've never left him for this long before," she whispered.

"I know," I said, reaching for her hand. "It'll be good for both of you. It's not even a week, Bella. Please try to enjoy it."

"I will," she said softly. "I'm just. . . nervous."

"We can call home every day. Mom's taking the whole week off."

"We're going to miss New Year's."

"We're not going to miss New Year's. We're just going to be spending it in Vail."

I saw her glare at me out of the corner of my eye. "You know what I mean."

"He's three, baby. It's not like he's going to even stay up til midnight. Let's go out. Let's get drunk. Let's make love all night and sleep all day."

"You sound like a fucking song," she laughed.

I furrowed my brow in thought. "I think that might be a song actually."

The rest of the drive was much better. Bella seemed to calm down a little. We got to the airport, checked in, ate lunch, since apparently the airlines decided that they weren't going to feed people anymore, and waited in the gate area until boarding.

It wasn't until we were on the plane that she started to freak out again.

"Edward?" she said, gripping my thigh as the plane taxied out to the runway.

"Hmmm?"

"We don't have wills."

I looked up from the SkyMall magazine. "What?"

"We don't have wills."

_What the fuck is she talking about?_

"Wills, Edward," she frowned, obviously reading my clueless expression. "As in, who's going to take care of Charlie if the plane crashes."

I barked out a laugh and covered my mouth with my hand when the guy in front of me turned and scowled.

_Asshole._

"Baby, the plane is not going to crash."

"How do you know?"

"I just do. We don't need wills."

Bella angled her whole body towards me and scowled.

_Oh shit. I think I said something wrong._

"How can you say that? Of course we need wills. How will anyone know what to do with him if something happens to us?"

"Okay," I said, trying to appease her. "As soon as we get home, we'll go see the family lawyer and get wills drawn up, okay."

"But what if the plane. . ."

I pressed my mouth to her lips to shut her up. She was simply panicking. Nothing a little bit of love couldn't handle.

_And if she really needs me to, for the sake of her sanity, I'll take her to the bathroom and make sure she's completely calmed down._

"The plane will be fine, Bella," I said firmly once I had pulled away. I adjusted myself at the thought of mid-air sex and went back to my magazine.

We touched down in Denver without having to resort to any bathroom trysts.

_Damn It._

We picked up our rental car and drove the three hours to Vail. Bella called home to check on Charlie. He was, of course, just fine. Enjoying his very own "staycation".

Finding the Cascade resort was fairly easy and it only took us a few minutes to get checked in. The condo was like a fucking house. Scratch that, it _was_ a fucking house. It had three bedrooms and two baths; a full kitchen, living room, dining room, and a huge stone gas fireplace. I think it was bigger than our apartment.

"Why on Earth did your parents think we needed something this big?"

"Well," I started. "If you remember correctly, we weren't together when my parents got you this. Maybe they thought you'd bring a friend who wouldn't share your bed."

Bella scoffed. "You're mother knew exactly what she was doing, Edward."

I laughed. "Yeah, she probably did. Are you hungry? Do you want to go get some dinner?"

Bella nodded and then yawned. It was only eight Seattle time, but the whole day of travelling had been exhausting. As much as I wanted to make the most of our nights alone, Bella really didn't look up to fooling around.

We ate at a little bistro down the street. I chatted with the waiter who told us the best bar in town to go to for New Year's. He recommended we get there early though if we wanted to actually sit down.

When we got back to the condo, we changed into our pajamas. Within moments of sitting down on the sofa to watch a movie, Bella was asleep in my arms. I carried her to bed and curled up next to her.

I watched her sleep, ghosting my fingertip over her forehead, cheek, and lips. She was so beautiful.

"Marry me," I whispered.

XXXXXXXX

**AN: See, I told you, nothing to worry about. I could not, would not taint this first holiday with drama. Let them have their moments. Next chapter the answers begin to fall into place.**

**As always, I would love to hear your thoughts. **

**NEXT WEEK: Edward recalls where he's seen James Hunter before. **

**So, I believe that I will be allowed to post my o/s that I did for the Fandom Against Domestic Violence tomorrow 3/18/11. It's called The Invisible Line. Summary: Edward and Bella, friends since high school, are very close. So close, that the line between friendship and something more is often blurred. Will they ever cross the line or will they always teeter on the edge of what could be. It's a kinda playful and I had so much fun writing it. I would love for you to check it out. **


	33. Connections

**A/N: Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your reviews and PMs. Fanfiction was total fail this week, as many of you know, and I'm still not getting everything sent to my e-mail so I do apologize if I didn't respond.**

**Thank you for everyone who has read The Invisible Line. I'm absolutely loving your response and it was rec'd on www(dot) tehlemonadestand (dot)blogspot (dot) com so thank you. I'm working on review replies for that as well. **

**Mollie worked her magic on this chapter. You all really would be amazed at the before and after beta difference. LOL. **

**Mel is my wonderful pre-reader. She also was very kind to set up that videoteaser on Youtube for me. Link is on my profile page (Credit for clip goes to Showtime's 'Shameless) :o)**

**This Chapter has a Maturity rating. Please abide by the guidlines set out by Fanfiction . net**

**It has been requested that I warn you of impending drama, so I will make sure to do that. **

**Disclaimer: As always, Stephenie is the money maker. **

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 31: Connections

BPOV

I was slowly roused from an amazing sleep by. . . Hmmm, I actually didn't know what caused me to wake up. There was no child in my bed, no Edward groping my girly bits. It appeared that I was waking up simply because my body was ready to wake up.

_What a concept!_

I didn't want to open my eyes. I really wanted to go back to my dream. A dream that was rapidly fading from memory. A dream that started out with Edward asking me to marry him.

I tried, I tried really hard, squinting my eyes tightly shut; burying my face in the soft pillow, but it wouldn't come back. And all I could remember was the words. "Marry me" coming from the sweetest lips in the whole universe.

I whimpered and rolled onto my back, giving up. It wasn't going to come back.

_Damn It!_

I reached over, intent on encouraging Edward to cuddle with me, but my hand hit an empty bed and cold sheets.

I lifted my head, confused.

_Where the hell did he go?_

"Edward?"

No answer. I looked at the clock. It was ten o'clock.

_Holy shit, how did I sleep so late?_

"Edward?" I called out a little louder.

Still no answer. I climbed out of bed, stretching my arms over my head and padding my way down the stairs and into the main living area.

Everything was silent.

"Edward, are you here?"

_Apparently not._

There was a pot of coffee brewing and there were two newspapers, a Vail Daily and a Denver post sitting on the table. He must have just gone out somewhere. I searched around in the cupboards and found a mug, pouring myself a cup. I sat down at the table and read the headlines of the newspapers, flipping through to see if anything newsworthy caught my eye.

_Nope. News is just as boring here as it is back home._

I threw the newspapers to the side and looked around. It was very odd to be by myself. It was kind of creepy. It had been a long time since I had truly been entirely alone.

From the moment Charlie was born, I almost always had him with me. People came and went and Riley was there for me frequently, but it was nothing like my life since returning to Forks. Over the last several months I had grown accustomed to being a part of a big family. But more than that, I had grown accustomed to having a constant and consistent partner in Edward. I knew that he would be back soon, but I was still slightly on edge.

Picking up my coffee, I wandered to the back patio and opened the door. The sun was shining and the sky was a gorgeous shade of blue. It was very deceiving. I was expecting it to be mild outside, but when I opened the door it was actually quite cold. I grabbed a throw off the sofa and wrapped it around my shoulders before actually heading outside.

Silence. There were only few birds chirping and a slight breeze rustling the trees. I looked over and noticed that there was a hot tub sitting on the corner of the patio. It was not hidden from the other decks and patios surrounding us.

_Well, crap, there goes the hot tub sexing._

I tried to think about my dream, but nothing other than those words came back to me. I thought about Edward and how far we'd come over the last several months. How far he'd come from the boy I'd known as a teenager. He was still cocky, he was still an ass. . . at times, but he was such a good man. I remembered those exact words coming out of Esme's mouth the night I told him about Charlie. "_He'll come around, Bella. He's a good man_."

He was, indeed an amazing man and an amazing father. And someday, I hoped that he would be an amazing husband. _My_ amazing husband.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't hear the patio door open behind me.

"Hey, you," Edward purred in my ear as his arms slid around my waist, making the blanket cling to me even tighter. "How long have you been up?"

I tilted my head up to see him. "Not long, twenty minutes or so. Where did you go?"

"I went to pick up some breakfast. You looked so peaceful I didn't want to wake you." He kissed the side of my face and we stood there looking into the trees for several minutes.

"Let's go eat before it gets cold," he said pulling me backwards.

We ate slowly, enjoying our time to just be with each other. I had split emotions. I missed my baby, but I liked being able to just focus on myself and Edward.

After breakfast, I led him upstairs and into the bathroom. I turned on the shower and slowly began removing my pajamas. He watched me wordlessly, his eyes soft and admiring. Once I was completely naked, I undressed him, making sure to run my fingertips over his skin in places I knew were sensitive. He moaned lightly, but continued to let me direct where we were going. Stepping under the heated spray felt like heaven. I felt Edward step in behind me and press his lips against my shoulder. I tilted my head and closed my eyes while his hands ran up and down my arms.

He covered my body in soap and sank to his knees. I almost felt like he was worshiping me as he expertly cleansed every last inch of my flesh. We continued on, soaping, sudsing, licking, sucking. By the time we were even beginning to be satiated, the water was running cold.

We had agreed that there would be no plan for our trip. There were things that we wanted to do, like take a gondola ride up to the top of the mountain, but I refused to be on a schedule. This was our vacation and I didn't want to be bound to an itinerary.

We bundled ourselves up, me in my snow hat with the bobble on top and fingerless gloves that Edward loved to make fun of, and wandered around Vail Village.

There were ski bunnies all over the place wearing skin tight "ski" pants and puffy jackets; their hair all quaffed and make-up heavy.

Then there were the locals. The rich kids and ski bums that didn't give a shit. They wore their baggy boarding clothes and swaggered like they owned the place. Most likely they really did own the place or their parents did.

Edward kept his arm around me as we moved from shop to shop. Seriously, these people had to have some insane money. Patagonia, North Face, fur shops, art galleries, jewelry places where the cheapest piece was ten grand. My God. And the whole place looked like something out of a movie.

I saw the ski bunnies eyeing up Edward, but I didn't care. Especially when I felt his hand slip down to my butt and grab me firmly when a group of giggling co-eds walking behind us made a comment about his shoe size. Following that, I heard the words "lucky bitch" grumbled from one little tart's mouth.

I turned abruptly to face her, making Edward grab onto me tighter. "You have no idea," I smirked before grabbing his hand and continuing to walk.

I could see Edward laughing out of the corner of my eye and he brought our joined hands up to kiss my knuckles.

"I really do love you, you know that?"

"Yes, I do," I smiled back at him.

We stopped for coffee and muffins mid afternoon. Since we had eaten breakfast so late, we figured something light would tide us over until dinner. Edward had made reservations at a Tuscan restaurant called Cucina Rustica. It wasn't fancy, but it was still very nice.

The lights were dimly lit and there were candles on the table. The atmosphere was casually romantic with a roaring fire in the middle of the dining area. Edward and I shared a bottle of red wine and talked about what we might bring Charlie back as a gift. We discussed Rose and Emmett and how their lives were going to be changing in just six short months.

Just after we finished our dinner, while we were waiting on a piece of chocolate cake to share, Edward took a deep breath.

"Are you okay?" I asked, grabbing his hand across the table.

He nodded and smiled, but he looked nervous. I continued to watch him, waiting for him to say what was obviously on his mind.

"Bella, I think we should leave Washington."

I blinked rapidly at him, watching his jaw tense and his eyes squint in worry. I wasn't sure what I was expecting, but that certainly wasn't it. I swallowed the lump that was in my throat and opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Taking a sip of wine, I looked him in the eye.

"Um, okay. When, exactly, are we talking about?"

"I'm talking about for school," he said quietly. "UW has great programs for both of us, but we need time to be a family, just you, me and Charlie. We can't do that in Forks and I'm not even sure we can do that in Seattle. There are a lot of. . . connections around us that we need to move past."

I knew that one of those connections was Riley and I felt a flash of irritation grip me.

"There are a lot of. . . 'c_onnnection_s' in Boston too, Edward," I scowled.

"Then we won't go there," he sighed. "We can go to New York or North Carolina or I can scrub them all and apply to a whole new set of med schools. We can look at schools that will work for both of us. We have so many possibilities and I don't want us to give them up because we're worried about what our families will think."

"They moved back to be closer to Charlie," I said, almost whimpering. "How can we take him away from them so soon?"

Edward shook his head. "No, they didn't. My brother and sister made the decision to move before they even knew about Charlie and my parents would have eventually moved back anyway. That's why they never gave up that house. My mom always wanted to go back. We're not taking him away from them, we're making a decision for us. But I need you to be a part of that decision. You keep deferring to me and it's driving me fucking crazy. I want you to be happy, baby."

I bit my lip. The thought of leaving my dad and the Cullen's hurt my heart. I always knew it was a possibility, but I never allowed myself to really consider it until I knew what Edward wanted to do, and then I would follow him. But he didn't want me to just follow him, he wanted me to stand with him.

He was right. Of course he was right. But why couldn't I tell him that he was right?

He gripped my hand a little tighter.

"Bella? Please say something," he whispered. There was a tone to his voice that seemed to startle me from whatever stupor I was in. It was panicked and desperate.

"Yeah," I squeaked. "I. . .You're right. I think it'll be good for us...to get away; to stand on our own. It's just scary to think about. I've gotten so used to having everyone around."

Edward nodded in understanding.

"We can move back. If we decide it's not working we can transfer. I just think we should give it a chance."

The waiter set down a huge piece of chocolate cake with chocolate ganache. There was a strawberry and a mint leaf perched on top with a drizzle of chocolate sauce dripping down the sides. Two dessert forks rested on the plate and I grabbed one of them before looking back at Edward and smiling.

"Okay. Let's do it."

"Really?" He smiled back at me, the tension melting from his face, neck and shoulders.

I nodded grinning. "When we get back home we can start looking at programs for me and when you get your acceptance letters we'll figure out where we're gonna go."

Edward picked up his fork, his eyes practically sparkling.

We had made a decision. One that would be hard, but was the right one for us, as a family, in the long run.

He fed me pieces of the cake and I giggled as the sauce dribbled down my chin. He caught it with his finger and sucked it into his mouth. The action made me cross my legs and clench them together tightly.

Edward grinned wickedly. He knew exactly what he was doing to me. We didn't talk about anything else heavy. Everything else could wait until we got back home. This was our vacation and we deserved to enjoy it.

XXXXXX

After dinner, we made our way back to the condo to get ready for the night out. We were heading to the Samana Lounge for the evening and from what we'd heard, things could get a little crazy.

I was looking forward to getting a little crazy. So was Edward. All the way back he kept whispering about all the things he wanted to do to me. I wanted to push him away and bring him closer at the very same time. He was making my body tingle with the naughty words and warm breath. I nearly pushed him down in the snow and had my way with him right there on Main Street, but I didn't.

"Do you think it's possible to make someone cum by simply using words?" he asked as we walked in the front door. His voice was gravely. Suggestive; seductive. I could feel his lips brush against my ear and I shivered.

"I don't know, Edward," I laughed, almost nervously as I took off my coat and hung it on the coat rack.

"Can I try?"

I glanced at him to see if he was serious. I should have known he was. Pervert. I pressed my body up against his, resting my hands on his chest.

"If anyone can, it would be you," I giggled. "You. . . have a dirty mouth."

"You love my dirty mouth," he smirked.

"I love the things you can do with that dirty mouth."

We reached the kitchen and he frowned. "Wait, I was talking about making you cum with my words, not the other way around."

"Turnabout's fair play, my love," I winked, pulling a bottle of water from the fridge.

Edward growled and grabbed the water bottle from my hands, setting it down on the island. He pinned my arms behind my back and pressed his chest against mine.

"I'm gonna use this dirty mouth to do things that will make you scream," he said huskily.

"Promises, promises," I taunted, trying to ignore the fact that my nipples were hardening and I was throbbing between my legs. I wanted him to touch me, but instead he let me go.

"Go get ready," he laughed, smacking my ass.

I blew out a loud puff of air in frustration and stomped my way up the stairs.

I took my dress into the bathroom and started to primp. I had shown it to Alice online and she gave it the New Year's Eve seal of approval. I had to use that tape that makes sure the dress stays in place so that my boobs wouldn't pop out. When I was pretty sure I was ready, I opened the door and walked out. I slipped on my heels and went to find Edward.

He was downstairs sitting on the edge of the sofa with the remote control in his hand. He looked absolutely delicious. He was wearing dark gray slacks and a deep purple button up, no tie. He glanced over at me and then back to the television.

I was about to get offended when his eyes snapped back to me.

"Holy shit," he laughed. "Bella, you can't go out in that."

I frowned and looked down at myself. "Why not? Is it that bad?"

"Bad? No, baby, it's not bad." He stood up, approached me and grabbed my hand, placing it on his crotch. He was hard; really hard. Like, ready to fuck me to the moon hard.

"That was not like that before you came down those stairs. I'm about to throw you over my shoulder and go all caveman on your ass. You woman, me man, we. . ." He made a rude gesture with his hand simulating sex and I laughed.

"How the hell am I supposed to keep my hands off you all night while you're wearing that dress?"

I gripped his cock and started rubbing him up and down. "That's the beauty of it, Edward. You don't have to."

He groaned as I leaned in, lifting up onto my toes and pressing my open mouth against his neck. I dragged my tongue over his Adam's apple and up to his chin. When my mouth was directly over his, I let go of his dick.

"If we don't leave now, we're never going to make it out of this condo," I whispered.

He put his hands on my ass and thrust his hips towards me, trying to get some friction since I had removed my hand. "Good, I don't want to go now."

I slapped his chest and tried to pull away, but he had a nice tight grip on me. He licked his lips and smiled crookedly.

"Don't mess up my hair," I teased. "How am I supposed to compete with all those snow bunnies if you mess up my hair?"

"What snow bunnies?" he grinned, leaning down and kissing my jaw.

"You're smooth," I giggled.

"Smooth enough for you to forgo going out?"

"Not that smooth. Let's go."

Edward huffed, but didn't put up a fight. He grabbed my jacket, helping me put it on before donning his own.

When we got to the club, there were quite a few people already there, but we still got in easily and found a seat. Edward got us drinks and we sat talking and listening to the music.

There was a couple next to us who we started chatting with. Adam and Samantha. They were a little bit older than us and had two kids who were with the grandparents in Denver. This was their first night out in months. They were still very affectionate with each other. She was practically on his lap and his hand was resting very high up on her thigh. I saw her jump once and gawk at him while he tried not to laugh. Then her face tinged pink so I knew he had to have done something under the table.

They agreed to watch our table for us while we danced. Edward wasn't kidding. He couldn't keep his hands off me. I had to smack him away twice when they slipped under my dress and tried to sneak into my panties. He just laughed, sticking his tongue out between his teeth and kept dancing.

As much as the thought of him fingering me in the middle of the dance floor was a turn on, I wasn't about to show all these people my cum face. Edward got the hint and although he continued to be extremely handsy, he kept it to the outside of my dress.

As midnight approached, people were passing around noisemakers and bead necklaces. It was noisy and people were acting crazy. It was absolutely fantastic. It was very easy to get swept up by the excitement. We were drinking heavily and laughing.

The bartender rang a bell and shouted out that there was one minute to midnight. We were sitting at our table. Edward had pulled his stool around right next to mine and we were facing each other, my knees between his. I reapplied my lipstick and watched him frown.

"You don't need that."

"I do," I said nodding my pretty intoxicated head up and down. "I want to look pretty at midnight."

"You look fucking amazing, baby," he growled lightly.

"Five. . . .Four. . . Three. . . Two. . .One. . . HAPPY NEW YEAR." Everyone was screaming, shouting and cheering; drinking and kissing.

I was staring into Edward's eyes.

"Bella," he whispered. I could barely hear him over all the noise around us.

"Kiss me," I demanded. "It's the New Year, you have to kiss me."

The corner of Edward's lips turned up and his tongue darted out over the bottom one. He angled his head and captured my lips in a gentle kiss, his hand cradling my jaw and thumb brushing over my cheek.

The kiss was sweet and warm, with a gentle pressure that still managed to take my breath away. Only the tips of our tongues touched, never pushing further, just softly caressing each other.

"Wow," I said, taking in a deep breath when he drew back.

Edward's emerald eyes were boring into me with an intensity that I had never seen before.

"Bella. . . I. . .," he closed his eyes and swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing slowly.

"What?" I asked, reaching up and wiping my lipstick from his mouth. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter," he said, opening his eyes again and grabbing my hand and kissing the inside of my wrist. "I want to ask you something."

At that moment, a huge guy came barreling into me, knocking me from my stool and onto the floor.

"What the fuck?" Edward roared, getting to his feet.

"Sorry, dude," the big guy laughed drunkenly. He was swaying on his feet and I yelped when he stepped on me.

Samantha shoved him away and helped me up and away as Adam joined Edward in their stand against the big guy.

"Don't fucking apologize to me. I'm not the one you just knocked down."

The big dude glanced over at me and laughed. "What, you mean the little hooker you've had your paws on all night? Whatever, man."

I watched as Edward's face turned red in fury. His eyes narrowed and his jaw tightened.

"Edward, don't," I begged, grabbing his bicep. "I'm okay. I'm tired, let's just go home."

The big guy's friends were also trying to pull him back. This would not end well for anyone if we let them start throwing punches.

I could see Edward's fists bunched tightly into a ball. The muscles all the way up his right arm were rigid as though he were about to strike.

"Baby, please," I whispered. I didn't care what some drunk idiot said about me, all I knew was that he had at least three inches and a good fifty pounds on my boyfriend.

Edward looked at Adam who shrugged, silently saying that he would back him up whatever he decided to do.

Edward spit at the guy feet. "You're not fucking worth it."

Next thing I knew there was a scramble. Bodies were being shoved around, including me and Samantha. There was shouting and swearing. Stools were flying and tables were being shoved around violently as a mass of male bodies collided.

The bell on the bar started ringing over and over and then I heard the bouncers shouting.

I watched as the bouncers pulled the big guy off of Edward and gasped when he turned to face me. His hair was wild, his clothes disheveled and there was a trickle of blood coming from his nose and out the corner of his mouth.

He sniffed and wiped his nose with the side of his hand. "Fuck!" he yelled angrily.

One of the bouncers came up and put a hand on Edward's shoulder. He flinched and almost threw another punch, but stopped himself when he realized who it was.

"We're going," Edward snapped. "I didn't fucking do anything though. Do you see that mother fucker bleeding? No, I'm the one whose fucking bleeding here."

The bouncer handed Edward a paper towel and laughed. "Relax, man, I saw it all happen. That fucker's been tanked and causing trouble for the last hour. And if he had called my woman a hooker, he'd have lost a fucking nut."

I grabbed the paper towel from Edward's hand reaching for his face. He winced when I touched his mouth.

I leaned in so that only he could hear me. "You promised to use that mouth to make me scream," I whispered. "How the hell are you gonna do that now that it's all busted up?"

I stuck out my lower lip, emphasizing my pout. Edward bent down, tugging at my lip and whispering in my ear.

"My tongue works just fine, Bella." And to make his point, he stuck it in my ear, making me squeal.

"Gross," I shuddered.

We spent another hour hanging out and drinking with Adam and Samantha before saying our goodbyes and heading back to the condo. We walked, or rather staggered, through the chilly streets. There were still a lot of people out and about and we could hear sporadic fireworks being set off somewhere in the distance.

When we got into the condo, Edward turned on the fireplace and poured us some wine that he had picked up when he had gone out that morning.

"I need to get out of this dress," I whined, sitting down on the sofa.

"I agree completely," Edward murmured, handing me a glass and kissing my shoulder. "Let me help you."

His hand slid up my thigh, pushing my dress up and over my ass. I took a gulp of wine and watched him kiss his way across my neck and down between my breasts. I giggled when he nipped playfully at my nipples through my dress before continuing downwards.

I set my wine down on the coffee table next to his. If he was gonna keep going, I was going to spill.

"I believe I have a promise to fulfill," he smirked, using both teeth and hands to pull down my panties.

I threw my head back and grabbed at it hair as he buried his face between my thighs.

"Ouch," he yelped, pulling back and touching his face with his fingertips.

I snapped my neck up and looked at him. "See, I told you!"

"I'm fine, baby, relax," he slurred slightly.

I brushed my thumb over his mouth and he kissed it gently. "It's okay, I promise," he smiled, lowering his head back down.

I let my head fall back as he dipped his tongue between my folds. I twitched when he started flicking his tongue rapidly and bucked my hips when he sucked my clit in between his teeth.

He didn't use his fingers, just his mouth to bring me to that place of complete and utter bliss.

"Fuck you taste good," he murmured, kissing my pubic bone.

I hummed lightly, letting the endorphins completely take over my body.

He didn't complain about any pain, but I saw him trying to discreetly adjust his jaw when he took a sip from his wine glass.

I sat up and tried unbuttoning his shirt. My fingers were fumbling because I wasn't exactly sober and it felt like it was taking me forever. When I finally finished, I peeled it down his arms. He reached for the hem of my dress, which was bunched around my waist, and started pulling it up.

When he got it to my breasts I felt a sharp sting.

"Ow, ow, ow," I yelped.

Edward's yanked his hands back and held them up in front of him.

"What did I do?" he asked, slightly panicked.

I pulled the dress down a little so that I could get to the source of the pain.

The tape!

"What the fuck is that?"

I separated the tape from the dress on both sides and then finished removing it, leaving myself completely naked except for four strips of tape surrounding my boobs.

"It's boobie tape," I giggled, grabbing the corner and wincing as I started to rip it off.

"What the fuck is boobie tape?"

I got the first piece off and handed it to him. "Would you rather that every guy in that place got a good look at them as they popped from my dress?" I asked sarcastically.

Edward pulled his mouth back into a snarl and I laughed.

"That's what I thought. It keeps the girls undercover," I shrugged.

Edward helped me remove the last piece and then placed gentle kisses all over the red welts in his attempt to soothe them. Or at least that's what he started out doing, but he quickly got distracted and his kisses turned into licks and made their way to my nipples.

After removing his pants and boxers he looked down at me.

"Turn over," he said, his voice thick with lust. I did as he asked and felt his arm wrap around my hips, yanking me upwards so that my ass was in the air. I felt his cock slide between my legs, but it didn't slip in. He coated the tip in the wetness that was increasing exponentially and just played with my lips, thrusting up against my clit. I was gonna cum. There was no doubt in my mind that what he was doing was going to make me come undone.

"Baby, Oh. . .I. . I. . I'm gonna. . ."

And then he pulled back and the pressure that was building faded.

"What. . .?" I turned my head just in time to see him return to what he was doing.

"Just trust me," he smirked. "I'm gonna make you feel so good."

Three times he did it. Building me up just to pull away as I was about to spill over the edge.

I was getting irritated. I wanted to cum. I wanted him to cum.

"Please. . ." I begged. My arms were too tired to hold myself up anymore so I sank down to my forearms.

Finally, he slid in. Starting out slowly and then increasing his speed. It didn't take me long to be back at the top, ready to fall.

"You're gonna want to hold on," he panted.

I gripped the edge of the sofa with my finger tips and his hips slammed against my ass. And when I fell, I fell hard. I screamed as the orgasm ripped through my body almost knocking me into unconsciousness.

Edward gripped me tightly and grunted a string of profanities before falling over on top of me.

He was heavy, really heavy, but I couldn't complain, so I just started laughing. Which made him laugh. He got up, holding his hand out, leaving our clothes where they were as we made our way to the bedroom.

XXXXXXXX

The next morning, we both slept in. I woke, completely naked and lying on my stomach with Edward's arm slung over my back. He was snoring lightly and completely dead to the world.

I didn't want to get up. I wanted to spend the first few hours of the New Year wrapped in his arms. But I had a raging headache and I really had to go to the bathroom.

Reluctantly I slipped out from under his arm and climbed out of bed. He groaned and turned over, but didn't wake. I squeezed my eyes shut, my head was pounding.

Too much alcohol. Shit!

I could smell it seeping from my pores and I needed to get it off. I had a nasty film covering my teeth as well since I hadn't brushed them in my drunken, horny stupor.

I stood under the hot spray and took a deep breath. I took my time lathering and rinsing my hair and then putting conditioner in it. I wasn't interrupted and I didn't have to hurry, because there wasn't anyone waiting for me to do anything. It was exceptionally relaxing.

When I finally finished, I opened the curtain slightly and got ready to turn off the water. I was startled by the fact that there was someone else in the bathroom with me and I let out a squeak. Edward's back was to me as he stood in front of the toilet taking a pee.

I giggled, and then snorted. "Um, Edward?"

"Huh?" he grunted.

"Are we gonna become one of those couples who share everything?" I grinned.

"What?"

He obviously wasn't awake yet.

"I don't know. Are we just going to start taking shits in front of each other now? I'm just curious."

Edward flushed the toilet and turned around. His eyes were barely open. "I guess so, if you want to."

I couldn't control my laughter. He just looked confused. "Nevermind, baby. I'm just teasing you."

"Don't turn off the water," he grumbled sleepily. "In fact, why don't you just stay in there with me."

I looked down at my fingers. "My fingers are all pruny."

"So?"

"So, If I stay in any longer my skin is going to start peeling."

Edward grabbed a towel and held it out as I stepped onto the bathmat. Wrapping it around my body, he leaned in for a kiss. He still smelled strongly of alcohol so I pressed my lips against his firmly instead of opening my mouth.

"I'll be out in a minute," he frowned.

I dressed in jeans and a sweater, put on wool socks and made my way downstairs. A few minutes later, Edward came down wearing jeans. He was in the middle of pulling a long sleeved shirt on over his head and he had his socks in his hand.

"Let's go out for breakfast," he said, much more awake.

At the mention of food, my stomach growled loudly. Edward laughed.

"Now will you kiss me properly?" he asked, letting out a minty fresh breath over my face.

I giggled and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him to me in a sloppy, wet, over-the-top tongue kiss.

He chuckled against my mouth and pulled away, wiping my slobber from his mouth. "Uh, thanks."

"My pleasure," I grinned. "Let's go, I'm hungry."

We called home on the way to the little diner down the street.

"Hi, Mommy!" Charlie chirped when Esme handed him the phone. I heard her in the background prompting him.

"Happy New Year," he shouted so loud I had to hold the phone away from my ear.

"Happy New Year to you too, baby. Did you stay up late?"

"No."

"You didn't? How come?"

"Cuz Gramma said I had to gota sweep."

"Oh, well Gramma knows what she's talking about," I laughed. "Do you want to talk to Daddy?"

"Yeah!"

I told him that I loved him and handed the phone to Edward. I listened to him to talk to Charlie for a few minutes before saying goodbye.

After breakfast, we strolled leisurely hand in hand through the Village, which was packed with people. It appeared that with it being a holiday weekend, half of the state of Colorado was taking advantage of the gorgeous weather.

"Let's go ice skating," I said, jumping up and down when I spotted the rink.

"No," Edward said bluntly.

"What? Don't say no."

"Okay, I don't want to," he said shaking his head.

I frowned. "Pleeeease?"

Edward groaned. "Bella, I'm gonna look like a fucking idiot on ice skates."

"No you won't. They have hockey skates, look at that guy." I pointed at a man who had just come from the rental hut. He had a pair of hockey skates in one hand and two pairs of teenie weenie little skates in his other hand. He sat down on a bench next to two little girls and started to help them get the skates on. "If he can do it, you can do it," I grinned.

"If I do this, you have to try snowboarding tomorrow."

I grimaced. I don't even care what I look like on a snowboard, I know I'm gonna fall down and it's gonna hurt.

"What if I break something?" I whimpered.

"So you're afraid of breaking something while snowboarding, but not while ice skating?" Edward laughed.

"I _know_ how to ice skate. I don't know how to snowboard," I explained, sounding like I was twelve.

"That's the deal, baby. I will get on the skates if you get your sweet ass on a board. I don't know how to do either so you're one step ahead of me."

"Ugh, fine," I conceded. "But if I break something, you know I'm gonna be one big whiny baby, right?"

Edward rolled his eyes and pulled me towards the rental shack.

I held his hand as he stepped out onto the ice. He was wobbly and spent the next hour slipping and tripping all over the place. More than once he pulled me down with him when he hit the ice.

"Stop doing that," I shrieked as I fell on top of him for what felt like the zillionth time.

"I can't help it," he laughed. "I told you I was gonna look like an idiot."

"Well you don't have to make me look like one too."

Edward wrapped his arms around me and kissed my cheek. "Let's go sit in the hot tub," he whispered in my ear.

I readily agreed and we turned in our skates and headed back to the condo. On the way, we stopped by a little mini-market and grabbed a few things that we would need so that we could throw together a few meals without going out. We also stopped by the liquor store and grabbed a couple more bottles of wine and a bottle of tequila.

"What are you planning on doing with that?" I asked Edward.

"I plan on licking it off every surface of your body," he smirked, tossing a lemon down next to the bottle.

I swallowed, feeling more than just a little turned on. "O. . .okay," I stuttered.

Edward snorted and paid the cashier, a young guy whose mouth was gaping widely.

His eyes shifted over my body, spending an inappropriate amount of time at my tits. They were covered, but it didn't matter. By the look on his face you'd think I was standing in front of him naked.

Edward's hand appeared in front of my face and he snapped his fingers. I looked over, but he wasn't looking at me.

"Dude, eyes up here," he warned the kid. "In fact, eyes completely away from her."

The cashier shook his head and mumbled an apology.

When we reached the condo, we raced upstairs and threw on our swimsuits. I slipped into the bathroom, knowing that if I undressed in front of Edward, we'd never get to the hot tub and my sore muscles were begging me for the soothing warmth.

When I got downstairs, Edward had the cover off the hot tub and the bubbles running. He was standing up, but he had obviously dipped himself. His hair was wet and water was dripping down his toned abs. The barbell in his nipple was glinting in the sunlight. I had a flashback to that first time I had seen it. When I was so mesmerized by the drop that made its way down into the waistband of his jeans. The feel of the metal under my hand and the sound he made when I flicked it. Before all of this. Even then, when he was an asshole all the time, my body couldn't deny that it wanted him, that it craved his touch.

I squeezed my thighs together and Edward raised an eyebrow at me.

"Are you coming?" he asked with a crooked smile.

He held out his hand for me and I joined him, sinking down into the water and relaxing instantly.

There was no touching at first, not really. Edward sat opposite me, his feet resting on the bench on either side of my thighs, mine, between his legs, dangerously close to his cock.

I tilted my toes forward and grazed him, watching as his eyes darkened and his tongue darted out, wetting his lower lip.

"Do it again, Bella," he warned.

"Do what again?" I asked innocently.

A few minutes passed and I pressed my foot forward. Edward's reflexes were fast and before I could actually make contact he yanked my foot. I slid off the bench and under the water, my nose flooding. Edward pulled me back up so that I was straddling his thighs. I coughed and sneezed, trying to get the water out.

"I warned you," he said, resting his hands on my ass, letting his fingers stray beneath the edges of my bikini.

"You do know that there's no privacy in this thing, right?" I sniffed and pinched my nose, looking around to see if anyone else was out and about.

He nodded. "I do, but they still can't see what's happening under the water."

He slipped his fingers around and inside of me, making me gasp out and lean into him. I continued to rock my hips, fucking his hand and trying not to make so much noise that the neighbors found it necessary to investigate. Edward's mouth covered mine when I came, swallowing up any sound that I wanted to make.

When I went to reciprocate, he shook his head. "That was just for you, baby."

I frowned, but he just smiled. "I have something else in mind for later, don't worry."

We got out of the hot tub not long after that and fell asleep, snuggled down under the thick comforter of our bed. Even with all the sleeping in, I was exhausted.

I woke to Edward stroking my back with his fingertips. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, fully dressed.

"Come on, sleeping beauty, it's time to get up."

"Where are we going?" I asked, groggily.

"It's dinnertime."

I sat up quickly. "You let me sleep all afternoon?"

"No, I didn't let you. I've been asleep with you. I just woke up about less than an hour ago."

"Oh!" I sighed. "Why are we so tired."

"I don't know, baby. The altitude, the alcohol, the fact that it's the first chance we've gotten in months to just relax and not worry about anything."

I wouldn't say that I wasn't worried about anything. It made me nervous to be so far away from my son. It made me nervous that we hadn't heard or seen anything from that James guy in weeks. Maybe he had just given up on following me. Maybe he figured getting back at Edward wasn't worth the risk of getting caught, if that's the reason why he was following me in the first place. My dad was a police chief. He had to know that. He had to know that by messing with me, he was attracting a whole lot of extra police attention.

"Bella?"

Edward reached for my hand and intertwined our fingers. "Get dressed, baby. I'm fucking starving."

XXXXXXX

It was late, very late.

"Edward, it's after midnight, where are we going?"

"It's a surprise, come on."

I followed him down to the main building, but instead of going in the main door, Edward led me to a side door with a code lock. He punched in the code and we entered into a room. Not just any room, the pool room.

The air was warm and humid. There was a low hum and the sound of trickling water.

"What are we doing?" I whispered, my eyes darting around. I was sure we were going to get into trouble.

"Swimming," Edward laughed.

"But it's supposed to be closed," I protested. "And we don't have our suits."

He turned his head and smirked. "I made arrangements. And we don't need our suits."

"What do you mean you made arrangements?" I asked suspiciously.

"I made friends with the night manager," he winked.

_What the hell does that mean?_

"What'd you promise her?" I asked, the teasing obvious in my voice.

Edward let out a barking laugh, which echoed off the walls of the pool room. He covered his mouth and then looked back at me.

"I didn't promise _him_ anything. I gave him a little incentive and he gave me the after hours code and promised we'd have the pool all to ourselves."

"What kind of incentive?"

"The kind that will let him take his boyfriend out for an extremely nice dinner," he said, looking at me pointedly. "Are you done asking questions now?"

I scanned the room. The shades on the windows that covered three walls were all drawn shut. There were no windows visible from the hallway so really, no one would be able to see us.

"But there's a security camera," I said, pointing to the corner of the room.

"There's actually two," Edward confirmed pointing to the opposite wall. He picked up a towel from the cart behind him and pulled one of the tables over so that it was right under camera. He stood up on it and threw the towel so that it covered the lens. He did the same for the other camera. "See, now no one can see us."

He came back to my side. "Now. Take off your clothes."

He had all of his bases covered. How could I possibly say no? Why would I want to?

I stripped my clothes from my body as Edward did the same. I finished first and entered the water. It was heated, but still chillier than I expected as it hit the underside of my breasts. I heard splashing and turned to see Edward swimming, naked, towards me.

I reached for him as he got closer to me, grasping onto his shoulders. He stood up, his mouth descending onto mine in a fiery kiss. There was no hesitancy as I opened my mouth to him, allowing his tongue to stroke mine passionately.

As I hitched my leg up over his hip, one of his hands slid around my waist, resting on the small of my back. The other reached up to caress my breast; his thumb flicking deliciously against my nipple before sliding over my ribcage, hip and finally sliding down my thigh.

I moved my hands down to his chest and pushed away from him

"Where ya goin?" he asked with his seductive crooked grin.

I didn't answer him. I simply smiled and turned around, diving under the water. When I turned onto my back, kicking my legs out in front of me, I saw him dive under the water and come towards me. Before he reached me I turned around again and swam back to him.

He met me halfway underwater, and grabbed my face, kissing me with his mouth closed. We surfaced and I took a breath and he plunged his tongue into my mouth, tilting my head and leaning me backwards.

I wrapped my legs around his waist and felt him enter me. I whimpered and he groaned.

"So good," he sighed.

It was such a weird sensation, being weightless and having Edward inside of me. I had to actually focus on moving up and down on him as there was no gravity to assist. It was slow and sensual, igniting all of the nerve endings from the top of my head to the tip of my toes and centering between my legs. His mouth pressed against my shoulder and I could feel his teeth bite down gently.

I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him against me as I came suddenly and violently.

"Oh, ah, ah, ah, Edward," I cried out, my voice carrying and bouncing around the room.

He slowed his thrusts to let me ride out my orgasm, but continued his oral assault on my shoulder, moving up my neck to below my ear and across my jaw.

When my body stopped twitching and pulsing, he sped me up again. Every time I lifted upwards, my breasts would come out of the water and the cool air made my nipples almost painfully hard.

Edward grunted and growled.

"I promised the manager I wouldn't."

"Wouldn't what?" I panted, still bouncing up and down on him.

"Uh, ah, I. . . that I wouldn't. . . Oh, fuck. That I wouldn't finish in the pool."

"Huh?" I was distracted from what he was telling me by the fact that his hands were now on my ass, holding me to him; himself inside of me.

"Stay here for just a minute," he said huskily. "Just. . . just one minute."

I reached for the wall as he slid out of me and swam towards the steps. He climbed out, still full mast and jogged away. He really did mean a minute, because he reappeared quickly, coming over to my side of the pool and reaching down to help me out. My whole body broke out into goose bumps and I shivered.

"Where are we going?" I asked as he led me behind a tiled wall.

My question was answered when he grabbed me and pressed me up against said wall, underneath a spray of hot water. The showers.

He lifted me up, pushing inside of me again and again, until we were both crying out.

"When we buy our first house, it needs to have a pool," he laughed, setting me down.

"A bouncy castle? A pool? What's next, a climbing wall?" I joked.

"Can we fuck on a climbing wall?" he asked, looking fairly serious.

I shook my head, grinning. "I don't think so."

"Then, no, no climbing wall."

I giggled as he handed me a towel.

We dressed quickly and Edward pulled the towels from the security cameras before we ran back out the side door, heading for our condo.

XXXXXXX

The rest of our vacation went by too fast. I made good on my promise to attempt snowboarding. I sucked. Big time.

Monday I spent the day at the spa and that night, Edward made good on his promise to lick tequila from my body. We also went to a place that evening that I never knew could be so incredibly erotic and intense. The control Edward had over my body and his was nothing short of spectacular.

I was so sore on Tuesday, however, that we spent almost the entire day in bed, watching television. Edward had food delivered and we took a long hot bath together and fell asleep early.

Wednesday morning we made our way back to Denver. I wasn't quite as nervous on the plane ride home as I was on the way there, but I still had a slight panic attack when we hit turbulence. The old woman next to me explained that flying out of Denver was always bumpy because of the wind stream coming over the mountains. I wasn't sure if that made me feel better or worse.

Once we hit the ground in Seattle, we couldn't get home fast enough. I'm pretty sure Edward was going close to ninety miles per hour most of the way.

I started taking off my seat belt as the car pulled into the driveway. Edward's eyes darted over to me.

"Please just wait until I stop the car before you bolt," he chuckled.

"I will," I said wrinkling my nose like a petulant teenager.

He shook his head with a smile.

The instant the car was put into park I was out the door. It's not that I didn't enjoy our vacation, but I missed my baby. I didn't wait for Edward. I knew he was behind me somewhere.

Throwing open the front door of the main house, I shouted. "Hello?"

"Moooooooooommmmmy!" I heard Charlie scream distantly. Seconds later I heard footsteps and just as I reached the stairs heading to the second floor, a little body came flying at me, jumping from at least the third step up.

"Umph," I grunted.

"Hi, Mommy. You're home."

"I _am_ home, baby, did you miss me?"

"Uh huh, where's my daddy?"

_Nice. I'm chopped liver now._

"Who's looking for me," Edward shouted from the front door.

Charlie's eyes lit up and he squirmed out of my arms. "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy."

I hung my head as I watched him run towards where Edward was standing.

"It's okay, sweetheart, he's just in a daddy phase," Esme soothed as she walked down the steps towards me.

"I know," I sighed, watching as Edward tickled Charlie into a fit of giggles. I was only sort of jealous. It totally gripped my heart watching them together. Charlie had lived the first three years of his life without his daddy, it was only fair that I give that to both of them, but it still stung a little.

"He'll always be a mommy's boy deep down," she said, reaching out to pull me into a hug. "Did you have a good time?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "It was really nice. Thank you so much."

She smiled. "It was my pleasure, sweetheart. You look well rested. Did you get to do any skiing?"

I laughed. "We tried to snowboard."

Esme's eyes got wide. "Really? How'd that go?"

"Uh, well. I'm pretty sure I've been banned from the mountain for my colorful language. I fell really hard on my butt in front of a ski school group and I think they all learned a few new cuss words," I said, looking a little embarrassed.

Esme laughed. "Whoops."

"Yeah," I chuckled. "It's okay though, I was pretty much done after that. It was cold and I was sore and grumpy. And Edward and his ridiculously athletic self picked it up faster than me."

"Did you try the spa?"

"Oh, Yes," I sighed. "On Monday. It was incredible. So relaxing. I was putty the rest of the day."

I looked over at Edward who was now hanging Charlie upside down by his ankles. He glanced up and winked at me. Of course, I blushed.

"How many nights did he actually stay in his own bed?" I asked, biting my lip.

Esme laughed and shook her head. "One, maybe two."

"I'm so sorry, Esme," I groaned.

"Don't be silly, Bella. All three of my kids went through the same phase. He'll grow out of it and we'll all miss it eventually."

I felt a twinge of guilt, but pushed it back.

"Put that child down and come give your mother a hug," Esme scolded Edward playfully. "You're going to give him a headache."

Esme and I both gasped as Edward swung Charlie upwards and caught him behind his back before setting him down.

"Did you think I was gonna drop him?" Edward smirked, giving Esme a hug. "Hi, Mama."

"Hi, baby. You had a good time?"

"We had an excellent time. What's been going on here?"

Esme frowned a little. "Charlie, sweetheart, can you go get Papa Carlisle for me, please?"

Charlie didn't respond, just took off running towards Carlisle's office.

"What's the matter?" Edward asked.

"Your father had a run in with Tanya at the hospital yesterday."

"What do you mean a run in?" I asked.

Esme looked between us. "She was brought in after a car accident, but she was relentless. Asking about you and telling him how much she missed being a part of the family." Esme rolled her eyes and scoffed. "She kept saying that she was sorry she left, but she couldn't handle Harvard anymore."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Edward practically snarled. "That little bitch has the nerve. . . does she really think that I wouldn't tell you what she did?"

Esme shrugged. "I don't know, honey. Carlisle tried to excuse himself, but she refused to see anyone else. Every time someone else tried to examine her she started screaming that she'd only let Carlisle touch her."

"She's fucking insane."

"She clearly doesn't understand that you and Bella are serious," Esme said, shaking her head.

"Oh, I think I made it perfectly clear to her that Bella and I are serious," Edward scoffed.

"Well, in any case. I think Carlisle brought the point home."

"How?" I asked curiously.

Esme smirked and then looked a little bashful. "He. . might have. . . called you our daughter-in-law." She looked at me and tried not to smile.

Edward laughed loudly. "He told her we were married?"

"Not in so many words. She kept on and on about how she wanted to get to know Charlie seeing as he was your son and all. He's not allowed to really less loose on a patient, but he couldn't take it anymore. He told her that we were excited to have Bella as a daughter-in-law and that we were looking forward to her giving us more grandchildren."

I snorted. "Wow."

I could see Edward watching me out of the corner of my eye, as if he were gauging my reaction.

"What?" I asked, biting my lip.

"Nothing," he said quietly.

Esme stared at him, her mouth slightly open before breaking into a huge grin.

"How. . . uh, she seemed to understand then?" Edward asked.

I didn't understand what had just happened.

"She threw a temper tantrum," Carlisle answered from the hallway. "Knocked over a cart and stormed out of the hospital without being discharged. I think she got the point."

Somehow I doubted that.

EPOV

We were home. It all went by so quickly. Bella and I had definitely become closer; physically, emotionally, sexually. We were in a whole new category after our trip to Vail. And I nearly asked her to marry me. Like, actually said the words. . . to her. . . when she was awake.

She looked absolutely stunning on New Year's. I didn't want to share her. She didn't even notice all the guys eye-fucking her, or if she did, she didn't let on, but I definitely noticed. I made sure they all knew that she was mine.

I was pissed at that dude who had interrupted my moment, but at the same time, almost thankful. I didn't have the ring and I hadn't talked to her father. I needed to do it right and as romantic as it would have been asking her at midnight, there were things I needed to do first.

And then he went and called my girl a hooker. If she hadn't been begging me to leave it alone, I would have fucked him up; put him in the motherfucking hospital.

As it was, I didn't want to end up in jail for assault. That would have really pissed Bella off, cause with it being a weekend and a holiday, I probably would have been there all weekend.

Ice Skating was a pain in my ass, literally. It fucking hurt, but it made Bella happy. It made her smile and laugh. It was so fucking worth it.

The pool was a stroke of genius. I wasn't lying to Bella, I slipped the night manager a couple of bills and smiled crookedly and he was putty in my hands. All he asked was that I didn't cum in the pool, which I didn't.

Snowboarding was fun. I fell, yes, but not as much as Bella. When she started swearing at the little kids who were in the boarding ski school I knew it was time to call it a day. I called the spa and set her up with a massage, a pedicure and a facial for the next day.

While she was doing that, I was out preparing for my night of ultimate seduction. I really was going to lick and suck that tequila from her body, but I refused to get drunk. I needed to have my wits about me. She needed just enough to keep her relaxed. I was hoping she'd trust me enough. And she did. And it was absolutely, fucking amazing.

I loved that woman more than life itself. I was going to be talking to Chief Swan as soon as I could.

As much as I enjoyed our vacation. I was extremely eager to get home. I tried to play it cool, but I was just as anxious as Bella was to get to Charlie. I missed the little guy more than I thought I would. I mean, I knew I would miss him, but when he jumped into my arms I realized just how much.

That night we had dinner with my parents and then took Charlie back to the apartment. Bella and I both put him to bed that night; watching him as his eyes fluttered closed in my arms before putting him into bed.

I lay down next to Bella and wrapped my arm around her.

"It's nice to be in our own bed," she murmured.

"Yeah," I agreed, kissing her shoulder. "It is."

After that, Bella was quiet and I let the feel of her body rising and falling lull me into a very deep sleep.

XXXXXXX

"Edward?"

_Why do I even let her in here anymore?_

"Edward?"

"What?"

"I'm asking you a fucking question."

"What do you want?" I growled.

"Do you ever fucking listen to me?"

_No, not really._

"Is that the question you're asking me?"

"No, you asshole. I asked if you'd take me to campus."

"What the fuck for? It's Saturday."

"I have a study session."

I looked up and shook my head. There was no way she was going to study looking like that. She was wearing low slung skinny jeans, five inch hooker heels and a low cut sleeveless blouse. Her tits were pushed up so high it wouldn't take much to make them pop out.

I chuckled. "Sure you do?"

I should have cared that she was fucking him, but I didn't. I always kept my shit covered.

"Are you gonna take me or not?" she huffed.

I looked at my watch. It was too early to hit the bars looking for pussy. If she was gonna keep hers occupied, I'd go find someone new to keep me company, like I always did.

"You need to get a fucking car," I growled.

"Why? You're my boyfriend, Edward. You're supposed to enjoy doing nice things for me."

What a crock of shit. I hadn't enjoyed doing anything for her since we first started dating and even then it was questionable. She was there because of the nice things she did for me. Like sucking my dick.

Her foot was tapping the floor angrily. I stood up and grabbed my keys and phone.

"What the fuck-ever, Tanya. Get your shit and come on."

"You are a real fucking asshole, you know that, Edward?"

I smiled. "Yeah, I do."

I drove Tanya over to campus and parked just outside the library. I saw that fucker standing next to his motorcycle smoking a cigarette looking smug as all hell. Dirty, hairy motherfucker. He could have her. I was gonna throw her ass to the curb soon anyway.

Tanya leaned over the center console and pressed her lips against mine. She tried to deepen the kiss, but I wouldn't let her. I pulled away. I avoided her tongue in my mouth if at all possible.

Why the fuck do I keep on with this charade?

"I'll see you tomorrow. I don't know how late this session is gonna go," she sneered. I'm pretty sure she was trying to make me jealous.

Yeah right. I'm sure I'll be real jealous while I'm banging some tight little pussy into her headboard.

"Hey, James," she squealed just before slamming my car door shut.

XXXXX

I woke with a start, sitting straight up and scaring the shit out of Bella.

"What?" she yelped.

"Fuck!" I yelled, grabbing my hair. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

"Edward, you're scaring me. What's the matter?"

"James." I growled.

Bella's eyes went wide.

"That scruffy motherfucker!"

"I. . . I don't understand," she squeaked.

Bella had her hands on the back of her head, her elbows pointing forward.

"That's the dickhead who was fucking Tanya. Her fucking study partner."

Bella opened her mouth and then closed it again.

"I only saw him once, maybe twice, but that has to be him."

"Where. . .how did you figure that out?"

"Dream. Memory. I don't know what the fuck it was."

Bella reached for me, but we were both startled by the cry coming from the baby monitor.

"Fuck," I groaned.

"Edward?"

"I'll go get him, I don't think I'm going to be able to get back to sleep anyway."

I heard Bella sigh heavily as I got out of bed.

Charlie wasn't actually awake. He was whimpering and tossing and turning. I turned on some music and sat in the rocking chair beside his bed.

_What the fuck is Tanya up to?_

It was not a coincidence. There was no fucking way.

I spent the next four hours pacing the living room trying to figure out what was going on, but my mind just couldn't wrap around it. Did they stay in a relationship after I tossed her? Did he follow her back to Washington? But the condom had his DNA and Cammy's. How the fuck did Cammy play into it all. I was pulling my hair out trying to put together all the pieces.

By the time Bella came out of the bedroom, I had just about lost my mind.

Bella put her hand on my forearm.

"Calm down, baby, let's call my dad."

Calm down? She wanted me to calm down? Easy for her to say. Okay, maybe not so easy for her, but I was tired and grumpy and completely fucking confused.

We called Chief Swan and I explained my memory. Well, the part of it that identified James.

He told us to hang tight and he'd get back to us as soon as he knew something.

It was hard to focus, but Charlie deserved our attention after being away all week. We gave him a VAIL snow globe that we had bought for him and watched him shake it furiously to make it snow over the tiny little replica village.

We bundled him up and took him to Tillicum Park, all the time waiting for the call from Bella's dad.

Finally, late afternoon, as we sat at the diner having an early dinner, he called and asked us to come into the station.

When we got there, Chief Swan greeted us, giving Charlie a quick hug before handing him off to Amanda the receptionist.

Bella sat down and I pulled the chair from Leland's desk, flipping it so that I was straddling it backwards.

"So?" Bella asked anxiously.

He sighed. "We questioned Tanya Denali."

"Where is she?" I snapped.

He frowned at me.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"We found her at her parent's house."

"And?"

"She said that James Hunter was her study partner in Boston, but that she never had a sexual relationship with him."

"That's bullshit," I yelled.

Chief Swan shook his head. "She said he's been harassing her. Over the last year he's been calling and hanging up, following her. Said he even broke into her apartment."

"And you believe her?"

"She's describing the same kind of harassment that Bella's getting."

"She's lying."

"Edward," he sighed. "It entirely possible that he targeted Tanya and when he found about Bella, he switched focus."

I shook my head. "If that was the case he would have known that I dumped Tanya a long time ago. She's fucking with me; with us. Whatever he's doing, she's in on it. Did she even file a police report?"

Chief Swan rubbed his eyes. "No, she didn't, son, but that's not unusual. A large percentage of women who are being targeted never report it. There's no evidence to suggest that she's anything other than a victim. I'm sorry, but . . as of right now, there's nothing we can do."

**XXXXXXXX**

**AN: So what did you think of their Vail holiday? Makes me want to drop the kids off with Gramma and take a vacation. LOL. I didn't want it to be a total smutfest, because that is never what this story has been about, but at the same time...it's their first time away together and there was no cockblockage. ;o) This chapter, as titled, is about them connecting to each other, making them as strong as they can possibly be. **

**I know so many of you wanted him to propose. Hell, he wanted to propose, but believe me when I say that this really wasn't the right moment. **

**I know, I know. I continue to answer some questions and create more. You've trusted me thus far, I just ask that you please continue. **

**So...some of you who re-read(and maybe a few others as well) realized that I did introduce you to James in Chapter 20 (Fluff and Foreboding). Now we know who he is, it's just about letting you in to his motives, which is not easy because E & B don't know them and this is told from E & B's POV. **

**Okay, so I have never brought one of my stories full circle before and it is taking longer than I anticipated. The Devil is in the details and I write a lot of details. If I don't cover my bases, you are all going to be left asking WTF? Please have patience with me, this is a learning process. **

**As for the 'Night of Seduction' and ultimate re-connection. I didn't mean to leave you hanging. You all probably have guessed what took place that night, but I'm all about balance in my chapters and trying to make sure that your focus is where I need it to be. It was not a 'fade to black' I will be putting that evening as an outtake. That way, those of you who want to read it can and those who don't can skip it. I have one other outtake I'm working on right now and both will be posted as soon as they are ready.**

**Bella's NYE dress is on my profile page.**


	34. The Calm

**AN: Yay! It actually posted on Thursday. At least for me it did. LOL. It is a little bit shorter than usual though. **

**Quick and dirty: You all know how much I appreciate your reviews. There are still a few that I didn't get to, but I figured you'd rather have the chapter. Thank you also to everyone who continues to pimp me via facebook, twitter, other websites. **

**Many, many thanks to Mollie and Mel who were fabulous, as usual. And to Lexie 2516 for helping me out with some last minute pre-reading. :o) **

**Disclamier: I do not own and mean no infrindgement.**

XXXXXX

Chapter 32: The Calm

EPOV

I was fucking pissed.

I was so fucking pissed that I was about two seconds from hunting that bitch down and forcing her to tell me what she was doing and why she was doing it. She was fucking with my life, but what was even worse was that she was fucking with Bella's and Charlie's lives. Of course, there was nothing we could do about it because she was claiming to be a victim. What? Were they fucking kidding me?

I didn't buy it for a motherfucking minute. There was no doubt in my mind that she and James had been screwing at the time. She was obviously lying to the Chief about that. She had practically tried throwing it in my face, saying that if I wasn't careful she was going to move on to someone who appreciated her. I told her that if she was so unhappy with what we had to just fucking go. Then she told me that he couldn't do to her what I could.

I was fully willing to take responsibility for being an asshole to her. Regardless of the fact that it was the nature of our relationship, I should have put an end to it long before I did. Now she had involved my family and I was on the fucking war path.

"This is bullshit!" I yelled as I paced around our bedroom after Charlie had gone to sleep.

"Shhh," Bella hissed, taking off her shoes. "If you wake him up again you're going to have to just bottle that crap right back up while I get him back down."

I growled and ran my hands through my hair. "I'm just frustrated."

"And screaming about it is going to solve that problem?"

"No, but fuck, Bella I don't like not knowing what's going on."

"You know more than you did yesterday. At least you figured out who this James guy is."

"Yeah, but how did that help us? Where does that put us now?"

Bella flopped backwards and stretched her arms above her head. "I don't know," she sighed.

"I mean, if he's all up in her shit, then why does either one of them care about you?"

"Thanks," she scoffed.

"You know that's not what I mean, baby. I'm just trying to put it all together."

"Did you screw his sister?" Bella asked bluntly.

"What?"

"Or his girlfriend?"

_Shit, I hate talking about this stuff with her. _

"I. . .no."

Bella sat up, resting her hands in her lap. "You don't sound too sure, Edward."

"Christ, Bella, can we stop talking about this?"

"I'm not trying to piss you off," she said, shaking her head. "I'm trying to help you figure it out."

I sat down next to her, resting my head in my hands. "I don't know. Okay? I don't fucking know what I did to him. I slept with girls who had boyfriends, yes, but this guy never hit my radar as a jealous lover. And it was usually pretty vital to me to know who's fist had my name on it," I added.

I felt her hand rest on my back and her head on my shoulder.

"I'll figure it out, baby. I promise," I said, putting my hand on the side of her head.

"I know you will," she murmured.

We finished getting ready for bed and cuddled up together to watch some television.

Her cheek was resting against my bare chest and she yawned before letting out a heavy sigh.

"What are you thinking about," I asked, kissing the top of her head.

"Nothing," she mumbled, pressing her lips against my skin.

I tilted her chin up slightly so that I could see her eyes. "I don't believe you. Tell me what's wrong."

She took a deep breath. "I'm just tired of this. I'm tired of it all. I don't want to be afraid. I don't want to constantly be worrying about who's watching me or following me. I just wish I didn't have to think about it. Whatever you did couldn't be bad enough for him to be doing what he's doing, right? I mean, you didn't kill anyone did you? Like in that movie _I Know What You Did Last Summer_?"

My chest vibrated in amusement. "My driving record is spotless and as far as I know my homicide record is as well, reckless or otherwise."

"I'm joking, Edward, but I'm not. I can't live like this."

"They'll catch him, Bella. He can't be as smart as he thinks he is. He's already put himself in a position where you could identify him. It's only a matter of time."

"You have a lot a baggage, you know that?" she said in a voice that was just barely above a whisper.

I swallowed and nodded. "Yup, I do."

We continued to watch Grey's Anatomy until the credit rolled. Bella snuggled into me.

"I love you," she said against my shoulder.

"More than anything, baby," I replied, squeezing her tightly.

XXXXXX

Friday, Bella and I took Charlie to school and officially changed his name on their records. The director looked at us oddly, but I didn't care. It was none of her business why we had changed his name. I was just excited that there was one more place that he was officially mine. We also sent in the documents to have it changed on his social security card. I didn't have to return to the clinic until Monday so we decided to run to Costco and do some other errands. My mom had given me a list of things that she needed for Carlisle's upcoming birthday and Bella liked to stock up on mega boxes of snack foods for Charlie.

"What am I going to do when you go back to work and Charlie's in school?" Bella pouted as we pushed the giant cart through the warehouse.

I hadn't really thought about the fact that she wouldn't be returning to work too.

"What do you want to do?" I asked.

"I want to feel useful."

I looked at her face and saw her frowning.

"Have you thought about going through UW and finding another research job?"

"Yeah, cause that worked out so well the first time," she huffed.

"Look at it this way, what are the chances that it happens again?" I was trying to lighten up the mood, but even I couldn't laugh at myself.

"I already tried that back in November. There aren't any that are close enough. I'd have to travel to Seattle or Tacoma two to three days a week."

I hummed. "What about something temporary. Something flexible that will allow you to work the hours Charlie's in school."

"Like what?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. A bookstore, a boutique? Or I'm sure my mom could use some help. She said something not too long ago about needing someone to go to project sites with her."

"I'm not a designer, Edward," Bella said glumly.

"I know you're not. I don't think she's looking for a designer, more of like an assistant."

We were quiet for a little while just putting things in the cart and walking side by side.

"And you need to study for the GRE," I finally said, breaking the silence. "You don't _need_ to work, why don't you take the time to study?"

Bella looked at me her nose wrinkled. "You want me to study six hours a day three days a week?"

I laughed. "I want you to do what makes you happy, but yeah, I would like you to focus on yourself for once."

She rolled her eyes, but I could see her thinking. It wasn't entirely unreasonable. For the three months before I took the MCAT, I studied every waking second that I wasn't in class or sleeping. I never went out, I rarely got laid and I didn't see my family at all unless they came to me.

"It's just like doing research, baby. You've been out of school for almost eight months and there's no way you'll be able to study when Charlie and I are home."

"That's actually not such a bad idea," she acquiesced.

"You can do some research on Psych programs too; see what's out there."

She nodded pensively and we kept filling our cart.

An hour and four hundred dollars later, we finished up our Costco trip and headed back to the apartment to put it all away. I managed to get all the frozen stuff put away before she practically jumped me.

"This is the last day we have to mess around in the middle of the day, wherever we want," she panted, unbuttoning my pants and sliding down my body.

"You don't have to. . . oh, fuck. ." I groaned as her mouth enveloped me. "You don't have to explain to me."

She hummed and I jumped a little at the sensation. It felt amazing.

_I am seriously the luckiest motherfucker on the planet. _

Before I could finish, I laid her out on the kitchen floor. I took her pretty hard. So hard, in fact that I'm pretty sure she had tile burn on her ass. That's possible, right?

As usual, I worried that I was too rough with Bella. Worried that I'd hurt her, worried that she'd have some post traumatic flashback. But she never did. She liked it rough. Not all the time, but I could usually tell what she needed and gave it to her readily. This time it was playful rough. The kind when we couldn't look each other in the eye without laughing.

We didn't even get all of our clothes off. Bella's shirt was up around her neck, her bra pulled down around her ribcage, and her pants and panties were only halfway on. One leg was completely free, but I just couldn't be bothered to remove them completely so they were tangled up around her right knee.

I had gotten my shirt off, but my pants were still almost entirely on, pushed down enough so that I could get inside of her. I still had my shoes on and it would have taken up too much time to get everything off, so I didn't. The shoes provided good leverage. So good, in fact, that on one particularly enthusiastic thrust we slid across the floor so fast, her head slammed into the base of the cabinet.

Once I made sure she was okay, we both broke out into hysterics and I almost had to stop what I was doing until we could focus. Almost.

"Fuck, you're crazy," I gasped, hovering over her and not wanting to leave her body a second before I actually needed to.

She giggled. "I'm trying to keep it interesting."

I laughed. "You're doing a great job. How's your head?"

"Fine, how's yours?" She smirked and then wiggled her hips indicating which head she was talking about.

"Very satisfied. . . at the moment," I teased.

I grabbed my t-shirt, using it to clean up the mess as I pulled out of her.

"Ewww," she whined as I dripped a little.

"Sorry," I smiled, ducking my head and standing up. I helped her to her feet and she pulled her pants all the way off.

"I'm going to go clean myself up. Will you finish putting the groceries away?"

I nodded and smacked her ass, making her yelp.

On the way to pick up Charlie, we stopped by Carlisle's attorney's office. I had e-mailed him to ask what needed to be done to set up wills as well as a trust for Charlie. His response had been almost instant. Apparently it was fairly easy. . . in theory. We just needed to fill out the paperwork and have it all notarized. I was also planning on setting up an account for Bella just in case something happened to me. In the case of my death, she would inherit everything that I hadn't designated to go to Charlie's trust fund. She didn't know that was my intention and I wasn't looking forward to having that discussion with her either. I considered just keeping it a secret, but if she did find out, I'd be in even more trouble. It was better just to bite the bullet.

Carlisle got home at three and Mom showed up at five, dragging Alice with her. They hadn't even gotten into the house before we descended on them.

"Auntie Awice, I'm a Cuwen just wike my daddy," Charlie chirped, jumping into her arms.

"I know," she grinned. "That's my name too."

"It is?" Charlie asked, wide eyed.

"Well, for now. When I marry Uncle Jasper it will be Whitlock."

"Whipwock?"

I snorted. "He sounds like that dude from Earth Girls Are Easy. The guy Jim Carey played."

Bella backhanded me in the chest, but she was laughing too. It was funny.

Alice frowned at me and stuck out her tongue before turning back to my son. "Yup, Whitlock," she nodded. She carried him inside and they disappeared. Bella followed. I grabbed my mom's bag from her and swung my arm over her shoulders.

"Ma, can you guys look after Charlie while Bella and I work on some stuff?" I asked, kissing the side of her.

"Of course, sweetheart. What kind of stuff are you working on? Or is it none of my business?" I saw a glint in her eye and the corner of her mouth twitch. The women was impossible.

I shook my head and rolled my eyes. "Bella was freaking out on the plane about wills and guardianship plans," I explained.

"Oh," Mom gasped a little. "Wow."

"Did you have that for us when we were little?"

"Yes, of course. You had your trusts from Edward of course, but Carlisle and I set all the rest of that up when he adopted you."

"Who would have gotten us?" I asked, curiosity getting the better of me.

"At the time, my cousin Margaret. Up until you were fourteen. Then we changed it to Grandma Cullen."

"Cousin Maggie? Really? Whatever happened to her?"

My mom's face got a really sour expression. "She tried to seduce your father."

"What?" I laughed unintentionally. It's not that it was funny, it just took me off guard.

"Yes. You remember cousin Robbie's wedding right before your freshman year of high school?"

"Yeah," I nodded.

Emmett and I had gone around collecting all the abandoned glasses of alcohol and got ourselves pretty nicely buzzed that night.

"She got really drunk and trapped Carlisle in the bathroom. Let's just say that she thought she was giving him an offer that no man could refuse."

"I'm assuming he refused."

My mom scoffed. "Of course he did. In any case, after that we decided Grandma Cullen could care for you if anything happened."

"She was like ninety, Mom. She died when I was seventeen."

My mom laughed. "She was not ninety, Edward. She was sixty-five, my lord."

I shrugged and held open the door for her. Once everyone was settled, my parents and Alice disappeared with Charlie into the basement and Bella and I sat down at the island spreading the paperwork out in front of us.

About half hour later Alice appeared.

"What are you guys doing?" she asked, taking a soda out of the fridge.

"Wills," Bella grumbled.

"Wills? As in, I here do bequeath all my possessions, wills?"

"Sort of," I sighed. "More like who will care for Charlie if something happens to us. We're also setting up a trust for him and all that."

"Oh," she said quietly, popping the top of the can. "Um, so. . . who were you thinking would take care of him? I mean, if, God forbid, anything should happen?"

I glanced over at Bella. She bit her lip and nodded.

"We were actually going to ask you and Jasper if that's something you'd be willing to do."

Alice gaped at us. "Really?"

"Yeah," I confirmed. "You don't have to, but I just think. . . "

"OhmyGod," she interrupted. "No, um, I. . .I . . ." Alice was practically vibrating with energy. "I don't want to answer for Jazz, but. . . Oh, my God, really?"

Bella started laughing silently.

"Talk to Jasper about it, Allie," I grinned. "Maybe we can go out for dinner tomorrow night and discuss everything."

"Okay, yeah, that sounds good."

She bounded out of the room with her cell phone in hand. I looked over at Bella who now had her forehead against the table.

"You alright, baby?" I put my hand on her back and started rubbing circles.

"I don't want to think about all this. It's depressing," she moaned.

"Uh. . ."

"Shut-up, I know it was my idea. But it's freaking me out."

I blew out a loud puff of air. "I know it is, but we need to do it. Besides, I also need to make sure that if something happens to me that you are taken care of."

_There, done. I said it. Brace yourself, Cullen. _

Bella lifted her head. "Nuh uh, you're not allowed to go anywhere."

"I don't plan on it," I chuckled.

To my surprise, she left it there. She didn't argue with me at all.

I kissed the side of her mouth softly and felt her frown. I pulled back and looked at her unhappy face.

"Now what's the matter?"

_Maybe I was wrong.__ This is where she's going to give me a hard time. _

"Um, I don't have anything to leave you," she said quietly "I mean, financially."

I had to try really hard to hold back my snort. "I'm not worried about it, baby. I really don't need anything. . . 'financially'. This is all just a formality anyway."

I stood up and went to get a soda.

"Do you want one?"

Bella shook her head. She looked stressed out.

"Let's take a break," I said reaching for her hand and pulling her up. "Let's go downstairs and watch a movie with Charlie and my parents, or whatever they're doing down there."

She nodded, leaving the papers on the table and following me down into the basement where Carlisle was lying on the floor coloring with Charlie.

Mom was sitting on the sofa, her attention completely on the television. She was watching one of those cake making shows.

"I want to learn how to do that," she said excitedly. "I think I could. I have all sorts of ideas."

Bella's mood suddenly skyrocketed and she practically skipped over to the sofa, sitting down next to Mom and curling her feet up under her. "Oh, I want to do it too."

"We can learn together," my mom practically squealed. "Oh, I bet I could make one for Carlisle's birthday party."

I looked over to Carlisle who had been watching them as well. He turned his head, meeting my gaze before grinning widely and shaking his head.

"You'd think I was turning four, not forty-four," he laughed.

"Dude, Pops, you're really gonna be _that_ old?" I smirked at him. "You might as well buy yourself a walker and join the AARP."

I heard my mom scoff and turned to face her. She was glaring at me. Bella's eyes widened and I was startled when Carlisle bowled into me, knocking me to the ground with a thud.

"Oof," I grunted.

"Call me old again, son," he said towering over me, his foot resting on my stomach.

"You're old," I laugh-shouted. "Old, old, old. Owwwww!" I cried out as Carlisle increased his pressure on my stomach. Charlie was watching with wide eyes and a curious smile.

"What was that? I'm sorry I didn't hear you," Carlisle said loudly.

"See, first sign of old age, Dad. Hearing loss."

Carlisle started laughing. "I give up."

He held out his hand for me and helped me up. I swung my arm around him. "Don't worry, Dad, I promise I'm in the process of finding a very good old folks home for you and Mom."

"You watch your mouth Edward Anthony Cullen," my mom yelled, right as Carlisle pinched my side.

"Ouch!" I jumped. "I'm kidding, sheesh."

Carlisle pushed me away and went back to Charlie.

I laughed and flopped down next to them, grabbing a crayon and grinning at my son who was still kind of gaping at me. His eyes darting between me and Carlisle.

"Papa and daddy were just playing around," Bella said gently.

I ruffled his hair. "I was just teasing Papa," I chuckled.

"Cause he's owd?"

"Ha!" I snorted. "Yeah, buddy, cause he's old."

Carlisle scowled at me and then looked at my son. "I'm not old, Charlie. I'm just a grown-up, unlike your daddy."

I snickered and started coloring in the Spiderman book that Charlie was working on.

Alice joined us about twenty minutes later.

"Jazz is on his way over. He says he's up for dinner tomorrow night."

"Cool," I said, not looking up at her.

"We can't babysit tomorrow night," my mom announced. "One of my clients is throwing a party and I need to be there."

"That's fine, we'll just take him with us."

"No, we won't," Bella said making me look up at her.

"Why?"

"Not exactly kid friendly discussion, Edward. Alice, can you guys come over for dinner instead and then we can talk after he goes to bed?"

"Yeah, of course," Alice said looking between Bella and me.

I opened my mouth to respond to Bella, but Carlisle nudged me and shook his head. I looked over at Charlie who was doing that head tilting thing. Little bugger was listening to every word we said.

"So, how is it that you have a better social life than we do?" I asked Carlisle, slightly disturbed by the fact.

"We've paid our dues, son. Do you know how many functions we couldn't attend because we couldn't find a babysitter or because one of you was sick?"

"Or all three of you?"

"Oh, yeah," Carlisle nodded. "Do you remember that time we were supposed to go to that benefit for pediatric AIDS in Seattle? We figured we'd make a weekend out of it and got a babysitter who was willing to look after you all night. We got two suites and were all dressed and ready to go."

I frowned. I remembered that trip. I glanced at Alice who was turning pink with embarrassment.

"What happened?" Bella asked anxiously.

My mom made eye contact with me and smirked. "I went to hug Edward goodbye. . ."

"Oh, mom, please don't," I begged.

"What?" Bella shouted.

"He threw up all over my gorgeous navy blue silk Versace dress."

Bella's mouth fell open.

I groaned.

"And then he was followed by Alice and Emmett. Luckily, they missed me. We decided not to go, gave the babysitter our suite and tended to all three kids who were one hundred percent better by the time they woke up in the morning. Meanwhile, Carlisle and I hadn't slept a wink."

"Oh, shit," Bella laughed.

"It wasn't my fault, I was ten!" I protested.

"Me too," Alice squealed.

"Were you able to save the dress?" Bella asked.

Mom shook her head. "I sent it down to the hotel dry cleaning and they cleaned it up pretty well, but if you looked real closely you could tell. I ended up donating it."

Essentially, that's how the rest of the night progressed. Mom and Carlisle telling embarrassing stories and me trying to ignore them by spending quality coloring time with Charlie.

XXXXXX

The next evening Alice and Jasper showed up with appetizers and salad in hand for dinner at our place. Bella made baked chicken with asparagus, which Charlie absolutely refused to eat. I snickered at the horrified look on his face when he smelled it and Bella pinched my leg.

"Baby, just try it," she begged.

"I don't wike it," he shook his head.

"You haven't even tried it."

"I don't wike it."

"Bella, it's asparagus. I don't know a kid on this planet that likes asparagus."

"You're not helping," she sang sarcastically. "Charlie?"

She put his fork up to his mouth and he pursed his lips together tightly.

"Okay," she sighed dropping the fork with a clank.

Charlie grimaced and picked his fork up using his hand to rid it of the offending vegetable before stabbing a piece of chicken and shoving it into his mouth.

After dinner, Bella and Alice gave Charlie a bath and got him ready for bed while I shot the shit with Jasper.

"When are you gonna come see the house?" Jasper asked, taking a swig of beer.

"I've seen it," I told him.

"Not since we did all the changes."

Had we really not been to their house since they decorated?

"Dude, seriously. We're not inviting ourselves over, just say the word and we're there."

He nodded. "I'll talk to Allie and see when's a good time."

"How's all the wedding shit going?"

Jasper shrugged. "No idea. Allie talks and talks and talks about it, but until she sets a date, it just doesn't stick for me."

I laughed. "Isn't that something you two should do together. The date and all that?"

"I've already told her that I don't care. I just want to marry her, man. If she said tomorrow that she wanted to go to city hall tomorrow, I'd be there."

"Tomorrow's Sunday," I deadpanned.

Jazz punched my shoulder. "Shut-up fucker, you know what I'm sayin."

"I do," I nodded.

I sat there thinking about telling Jasper my plans to ask Bella to marry me. It wasn't that long ago that he was in my position. But they had been together for years. Even with their break-up, they had way more time together than Bella and I did.

"You gonna suck it up and ask her?" Jasper asked, startling me from my thoughts.

"What?"

_How the fuck did he know what I was thinking? _

"Bella." he laughed, shaking his head. "Brother, don't even try and deny that you're thinking about marrying that woman."

I looked around making sure that she wasn't anywhere in the vicinity. I could hear a faint murmur of voices from down the hallway.

"I almost did. On New Year's."

"Why didn't you?"

"Cause we were both fucking drunk."

"So?"

"I want to do it right, Jazz. I want us both to be completely sober so that she knows I'm serious. I want to ask the chief's permission."

He snorted. "Good luck with that one."

"Thanks," I mumbled. "You think he's gonna say no?"

"Are you not gonna ask her if he does?"

I sighed. "No. I'll still ask her."

"Then it doesn't matter. I don't know what the chief's gonna say, Ed. The man hated you with a passion, but. . . .but I don't think he does anymore. I actually think he kinda likes you."

"I hope so."

Jasper and I lightened up our discussion until the girls got back.

"He's so freaking cute, Bella. How do you ever discipline him?" Alice asked as they came into the living room.

Bella giggled. "I'm lucky he's a good kid. For the most part, I don't have to really discipline him. He knows the rules and when he forgets I remind him. But trust me, there are times where I honestly wonder where the hell I went wrong."

"No, that little angel doesn't throw temper tantrums," Alice scoffed.

"Oh yes, he does," I pitched. "He may not throw them often, but when he does, they are fucking spectacular."

"On that note," Bella said. "Let's talk business."

We all kind of sagged. Guardianship of Charlie with anyone other than Bella and I was not something that any of us really wanted to think about.

We spent the next half hour going over things. We'd have to sign everything in front of a notary. Luckily, the attorney's secretary happened to be one and we could all meet up at the office early in the week.

Once it was all finished, we sat and drank, laughed and basically just hung out. Jasper and Alice decided to stay at my parent's house since they both had been drinking; at about two a.m. we said goodnight.

XXXXX

"Bella, slow down," I groaned.

"I can't," she panted.

"You're going to wear yourself out."

"Shut-up, I need to concentrate. What's the matter, can't keep up?" she teased.

_Oh, she is so going to get it. _

I sped up to match her pace. "Where is all this energy coming from?"

"I don't know," she laughed. "I'm all worked up."

"About what?"

"Stop talking to me, I can barely breathe."

"Then. Slow. Down."

Bella halted abruptly.

"I didn't mean stop," I protested. "Come on, I can't just stop."

"Nope, I'm done."

"Beeeelllla!" I whined.

_God, I sound like Charlie._

"I feel much more relaxed now, thank you, baby," she smiled kissing me.

She began walking away from me back towards the house.

"That's the last time I take you out for a run," I yelled as I watched her ass sway dramatically.

I didn't know exactly what had gotten into her. I think it was from being cooped up in the house all week. On Monday, we'd met Alice and Jasper at the attorney's office and got all of our legal documents notarized before heading to lunch with them.

That was the last time I think she went anywhere. The weather had been horrible, making it way too cold for her and Charlie to get out on the days he wasn't in school. I came home from work on Thursday afternoon to find the apartment in ruins. Well, nearly. There were blankets spread from one end of the living room to the other, draping over furniture, lamps, even tacked to the fucking wall.

There were pots and pans all over the kitchen floor and a trail of toys starting into the living room and disappearing down the hallway.

"Bella?" I called out.

"Shhh," she said, poking her head out from the blankets.

"Why?"

She pulled the covers back even further to show me a passed out little boy curled up into her side.

"Fuck, he's asleep? How long's he been asleep?"

"Twenty minutes. We were reading The Cat in the Hat. I looked down and he was out."

"He's gonna be up all night. Are you going to stay up with him?"

"He's been running me ragged all fucking day, Edward. I just needed a half hour of silence."

I turned away and started picking some of the shit up off the floor, which only pissed her off. I couldn't fucking win.

She was a little better on Friday because she spent the day with my mom and sister getting ready for Carlisle's birthday. They were having a pretty big party and my mom and Bella really were trying one of those fancy cakes.

But on Saturday morning, the day of the party, she woke up agitated again so I suggested she take a run with me. The freeze had finally let up and even though it was still cold, it was dry and nice to get out. Charlie practically flew to the main house when I told him he was going to help Gramma with some last minute baking. The kid loved to cook.

Bella ran practically full speed for about fifteen minutes. She may have been little, but she was fast. And then she just stopped. My muscles protested. I was ready to stretch them out, but  
I couldn't very well let her go on her own. We were two miles from the house and James had been on my mind lately. A lot. Fucker was gonna try something. He'd been invisible for far too long.

And Tanya? Bitch was crazy. I'd spotted her in Port Angeles twice during the week. The first time she was standing outside a coffee shop smoking a cigarette. The second, she was coming out of the WalMart and appeared to be yelling at someone on her cell phone. Both times, I was in my car on my way home so I couldn't really stop and confront her.

_Or take her out. _

Besides, both Carlisle and Chief Swan had suggested that I avoid her if at all possible. I had to agree with them. It was obvious she wasn't afraid of lying and the last thing I wanted was for her to go and make some accusation that I had assaulted her.

I ran back, catching up with Bella easily. "Can we at least jog back to the house?"

She nodded and we went at a much more leisurely pace all the way home.

I let Bella shower alone so she could go finish helping with set-up. I needed a few minutes to myself anyway. I was going to ask Chief Swan for his blessing to marry his daughter and I was fucking nervous.

As the day progressed, the knot in my stomach didn't get any better. Jasper and I ran last minute errands for my mother and he tried to take my mind off of it by telling me about some asshole in his office who was caught fucking the secretary on the boss's desk after hours. I laughed and shook my head in the right places, but I couldn't quite push past the anxiety I was feeling.

I found myself wishing that Jasper could transfer some of his calm to me. Motherfucker was always laid back.

I momentarily forgot it all though when we returned to the house. My girl was sitting on the sofa, with our son in her lap. She was talking to him quietly and smiling. I watched as he put his finger up his nose and chuckled as Bella pulled it out, wrinkling her nose and shaking her head.

She must have heard me, because her head turned. Our gazes met and she flashed me a brilliant grin. My heart sped up, beating wildly in my chest just from one simple smile. Only Bella could do that to me. She was the only girl in my life that had ever elicited that reaction. And yet, even though my body was responding to her, my mind felt clear and relaxed for the first time in hours. She was my calm.

I grinned back and then let my mother drag me and the bags I was holding into the kitchen.

People began arriving shortly after four. I barely even got a chance to see my girl. She was flitting around the room saying hello to people; talking, laughing. No sign of the wound up woman she'd been for the last several days.

Carlisle walked around with Charlie attached to his hip for a while, introducing his 'grandson' to all of his colleagues and friends. None of them looked surprised, indicating that he had already told them, but I did see a few curious glances my way. There were pats on my back and several '_You've got a beautiful family_'s.

I saw Alice and Bella sneak a couple of shots at the bar that had been temporarily resurrected in the living room. Bella's cheeks pinked up from either the alcohol or the fact that she had been caught. She winked at me before setting her glass back down.

I sat down in a chair, watching all the people around me talking and laughing. I was going to miss it. The family get-togethers for birthdays or just for the hell of it. I could only imagine how Bella felt. She'd never really had that and now we were going to be leaving it behind voluntarily.

I knew it was going to be difficult, us being on our own. But unlike Bella, I'd never learned to be independent. Not truly independent. I'd never lived more than twenty minutes from my parents. Eventually, I wanted to settle close to them so Bella and I could raise our family; a big one; with them by our side, but first we needed to make a break. My parents had done it. Rose and Emmett had done it. Even Jasper and Alice had spent the summer after their reunion in New York, finding themselves as a couple again.

Chief Swan sat down next to me. "You look like you're thinking awfully hard," he chuckled.

I looked up and smiled. This was my opportunity. The man was here and in a good mood. I took a quick sweep of the room and saw Jasper who gave me sly thumbs up.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Yeah, uh, I sort of am."

He lifted his eyebrow at me waiting for me to elaborate.

_I guess it's now or never. _

I looked down at my hands and began twiddling my thumbs. "Um. . . Uh, I'd. . .I'd like to ask Bella to marry me," I said quietly.

When he didn't respond, I was forced to look up at him.

He was staring at me, making me even more nervous than I already was.

"Chief?"

"What?"

"Um. . ." I was at a loss. He knew that I wanted to marry her. I couldn't imagine that this was entirely a surprise. I guess I just didn't expect the silence. He gave me a break though.

"Ask me properly, son," he said gruffly. "You cannot ask to marry my daughter without looking me in the eye."

_Oh! Well shit!_

I closed my eyes for a moment and when I opened them again was staring directly into his eyes.

"Sir, I'd like to have your blessing to ask Bella to marry me." It definitely came out more confident than I felt and I almost wanted to pat myself on the back. Not that I wasn't positive that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, but I was a little worried that her dad wasn't on the same page. That he wouldn't think that I had proved myself enough.

He nodded and I watched his moustache twitch. "Much better," he said. "Now, as for your request. . ."

I held my breath, waiting for his answer. I was going to ask her no matter what, but I really, really wanted the chief to support me. I couldn't pinpoint exactly when it happened, but I found that I really kind of craved his approval.

"You guys haven't been together that long."

"I realize that, Chief, but. . ."

"You really need to learn when to shut your mouth," he chuckled.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"I have no doubt in my mind that you love my daughter, Edward. Or that you love my grandson. If things had gone differently, I do believe that you and Bella would have already been married."

I nodded. He was probably right.

"You've come a long way, son." He rested his hand on my shoulder. "And you absolutely have my blessing to ask Bella to marry you."

I breathed out a long forceful breath and smiled.

"I can't guarantee she's gonna say yes though," he added, wiping the smile from my face. I glanced up at him again, slightly panicked. Was there really a chance she'd say no?

"Oh, relax. I'm just messing with you," he laughed.

"Not funny, Chief," I griped.

He held up his beer. "Cheers."

I clinked my bottle against his.

"Don't screw it up, son. Cause if you do, your ass is mine."

I chuckled nervously, knowing that he really wasn't kidding.

We sat together, silently watching the guests until the chief got up to go talk to Carlisle.

Next thing I knew, Bella landed in my lap.

"Why hello there," she giggled.

"You're drunk," I said, not hiding my amusement.

"Noooooo. I'm not," she said, shaking her head. "I'm just a tiny bit tiiiiipsy." Her eyes lit up as she started singing that Tik Tok song by Kesha.

"Oh really? You're not drunk?"

She shook her head and then nodded. "Wait, I don't know how to answer that."

"Don't worry about it," I grinned.

"What were you and my dad talking about?" she purred, stroking the hair at the nape of my neck.

"Nothing," I said a little bit too quickly.

Bella frowned. "Are you keeping secrets from me?"

I decided to distract her. I was keeping a secret from her, but for very good reason.

"Come on, baby, let's go see if Carlisle is ready to cut his cake."

"Ooooooh, cake. I love cake," she said, nearly falling off my lap. I caught her around the middle and lifted her up into my arms. She squealed, but stopped as I slid her down my body. I saw her shift and bite her lip, giving me a coy smile.

"Behave yourself," I whispered. "I don't think my parents would appreciate it if we disappeared for a quickie in the middle of Carlisle's party."

"They'd never even notice," she assured.

I set her down and kissed her nose. "Later, baby. Let's go get some cake."

"I love cake!" she yelped.

_Yeah, she's drunk. _

XXXXXXX

James POV

"Tanya, I don't like this," I growled, laying out a line. I bent down and inhaled.

"You're going to kill yourself one of these days," she sniped.

I shook my head, sniffed and wiped my nose. "What the fuck do you care?"

She glared at me. "I don't."

"Then lay the fuck off."

"What don't you like, James?" she asked.

"This plan. The one you seem to have all the answers for."

I'm pretty sure she was playing me. We both had our agendas, but I think she wasn't completely honest about what hers was.

We'd played this game for a long time. When I first started fucking her she had no idea why I'd singled her out. She thought she was just that beautiful. Pfft. Yeah, she was hot; and she was smart, but that's not why I wanted her. That soulless motherfucker deserved to feel pain and I was going to be the one to take him down.

"Just stick to the schedule, James and it'll all work out."

"Yeah, for you," I snorted. "You're going to end up getting my ass arrested."

"You're not going to get arrested."

"So why am I the one who has to lay low and you get to be out and about?"

"Because you got caught," she sneered. "I told you not to let her see you. Now they're looking for you. It's not my fault you're an idiot. "

I grabbed her and pulled her to me. I knew she wouldn't say no. She never said no. She needed me too much. She was like my own personal whore. Willing to pay with her body to make sure she got what she wanted.

I grinned at her. She rolled her eyes, but didn't fight me. She was a decent lay as long as I took control. She didn't know what to do for shit when she was on top. Like it was that fucking hard to bounce on my dick.

She couldn't keep my attention though. I wasn't a fucking cheater. We weren't together and she was fully aware of what and who I did. She even encouraged it. Like that fucking bartender chick.

I was supposed to play a role. A cheating boyfriend whose woman was threatening to take the kid. That was apparently what would get me a golden ticket. She had a type. T told me not to drink what she put in front of me if I wanted to remember any of it. Sick bitch was into date rape. I would have fucked her anyway, but whatever.

I did a line, smoked a bowl to counter the effects and fuck me up a little, and made my way into the bar with sob story ready. I got a safe drink from a male bartender and then the game began. She listened for a bit and then placed another drink in front of me. When she wasn't looking I dumped half it on the floor.

I played the part; went all droopy and stumbling, let her drive me home and take advantage of me. Pretended that I couldn't, shouldn't, wouldn't. I should have been a fucking actor.

I'm not usually one to eat unfamiliar pussy, but when she mentioned wanting to feel my beard between her thighs I found my motivation.

The girl knew how to fuck. And she fucked hard. I felt it only fair to reciprocate. Once or twice I thought she might have suspected that I was playing her, but she never said anything. As soon as she fell asleep I was out. I grabbed four fucking condoms off the floor, no need to leave behind any evidence. The chick was into fucking dudes with families; I had no idea what she'd do with my jizz if she had it.

T came to pick me up at a 24-hour coffee shop down the street about twenty minutes after I called her to come pick me up. She practically slapped me when I shoved one of the used rubbers in her face. She was fun to fuck with, but she did ban me from her bed for a good week, which was bullshit cause she was the one who pointed me in that direction.

When that girl turned up dead, I actually thought T had done it. I even asked her. She scoffed at me and said that the bitch's death was not part of her plan. I sent a silent prayer to the motherfucker who did it though. The whore deserved it. She wasn't any better than Cullen.

When I targeted Tanya, I didn't know the nature of her relationship with Cullen. I knew they had been together for a long time. I overheard her telling a friend that she was waiting for him to propose. They'd been together for over three years and it was just a matter of time. Like three years was a huge accomplishment.

It's so fucking easy to stalk people these days. All I had to do was follow her to class one day and sit next to her. There were easily a hundred and fifty kids in the class and nobody even knew I wasn't supposed to be there. I befriended her, tutored her. At first that's all it was. She began to open up to me; tell me about her fucked up relationship with the douchebag who fucked me over.

It really should have taken me longer to convince her that what she needed to do was show him that she could get her rocks off somewhere else too. That should have been my first clue that my plan was going to fail. I did everything I could. I sent her nasty, filthy texts, called her at all hours and even tried to set it up so that he'd walk in on us. But none of it worked.

And then Tanya went home for a few weeks and I tried to re-strategize. There had to be some way to get to him. But then it all fell apart. She showed up on my doorstep. The fucker had thrown her out; ended it completely.

I was furious. Raging. It was over. I'd never get my payback. I spent nearly a week on a bender, snorting blow, drinking cheap liquor and fucking the shit out of Tanya, who also spent the entire week drunk and crying. Unfortunately it was the first full week of fall classes.

When I finally made it to my classes, one of my professors confronted me. I didn't even think about it. I beat the shit out of him. I was arrested and thrown into jail for two months. Tanya came to visit me once, told me that she was going back to Washington and to come visit her when I got out.

I never thought I'd do it. I figured there was no reason anymore. But when I got out, there was nothing left for me in Boston either. I had been expelled, disowned, abandoned. Eight months after I was released I found myself on Tanya's doorstep in Tacoma.

I never did go back to school. I got arrested one more time for trying to steal a camera from a pawn shop, but I tried to keep my nose clean. Figuratively, not literally. I was still shoving every last dime I could get my hands on up my nose. Luckily Tanya came from money. She was my own personal sugar mama.

She didn't date. I don't know why. I didn't ask questions. I got a job in a chop shop and for several months Tanya and I lived together. I didn't share her bed, I slept on the couch. We had weeks where we fucked and weeks where we barely even spoke.

Until _he_ came back. Tanya's friend Jessica, who was an excellent fuck by the way, came to the house squealing. He was back and had found out that he had knocked up some one night stand. I laughed my ass off. Served the fucker right.

Tanya wasn't so happy though. She was downright pissed actually. She became obsessed. . . again. She spent more and more time at her parents' house.

And then came the proposition. She laid out my job and promised I'd get my payback.

I was now balls deep in this scheme and as confident as I was in my ability, something was off. I'd done all my research this time. Cullen was definitely in love with this one and their kid meant everything to him.

I bent Tanya over and unzipped my pants. "You better not be fucking with me, T."

"Just do your fucking job and we'll never have to see each other again, okay?" she said through clenched teeth as I pushed into her.

"That's exactly what I'm counting on."

XXXXXX

**AN: Ummmm, Should I be hiding? I don't think I even have the brain power to do my normal author's note. LOL. I may be coming back and adding something. **

**Did James' POV help? There was no other way to do it, trust me, I've explored all avenues. Bella and Edward don't know any of that. Yes, I will reveal what is behind James' hatred. **

**Thoughts? Questions? Comments? **

**NEXT WEEK: See chapter title. ;oD **

**I'd give you a rec, but really, I haven't had a chance to read. :o( **

**Find me on twitter littlecat358 and on facebook as littlecat fanfiction. UP has it's own facebook group as well thanks to my darling IPlayDoctor WithCarlisle. :oD**


	35. The Storm

**AN:Okay, Yeah, you all called it. The Storm. Original? Maybe not, but finding chapter titles is not as easy as you would think. LOL.**

**I've had several request to have UP translated into other languages. I have not decided if this is something that I want to do, not b/c I don't really, really appreciate it, but because this is the first story that I have put up for public consumption and b/c I don't speak any other languages, it's hard for me to let it go. Please don't do it until you hear from me and make sure that your FFnet PM function is turned on. Thank you!**

**Thank you to Mollie (aka Thing 2), who, once again, has worked her extraordinary magic to make this baby ready to read. She patches the holes and smoothes out the rough bits. And I really am not sure I could do this without her. Mwah!**

**To Melee03, who made me that absolutely heartbreaking pictease. She and Lexie2516 pre-read this and calmed my nerves a bit.**

**I'm thinking 3-5 chapters and an epilogue left. This is probably more accurate than my 5-8 prediction like 10 chapters ago. LOL. **

**I'm gonna put a warning on this chapter. I promised I would. I don't know if you'll need tissues or a stiff drink but I will just say this: There will be a little heart fail in this chapter. Please just be prepared, hold on tight, read to the end, and trust me.**

**Disclaimer applies as usual. I do not own.**

BPOV

The two weeks following Carlisle's birthday passed by quickly. Edward had changed his hours at the clinic to accommodate our new schedule. Instead of taking Thursday mornings off, he was working from eight to two on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. He then picked up Charlie and brought him home. Tuesdays and Thursdays he was there from eight to four. It actually worked out pretty well.

I had ordered several study books from Amazon and had them delivered two days later. When I called Dr. Stalworth, she had suggested that I take the psychology specific GRE. To my surprise, I wasn't bored at all. I joined an online group of people also preparing for the exam and we discussed and tested each other. We also vented and griped. . . a lot.

"You wanna go to the music festival in PA this weekend?" Edward asked one morning as he shoved a piece of toast in his mouth. "Ithsuppothda be nith."

I lifted my head from the newspaper and glared at him.

"Thorry," he said, taking a sip of coffee before grinning. "Is this better?"

"I have a hard enough time teaching our son manners, I shouldn't have to teach his father too," I grumbled.

He frowned. "Why are you so grumpy this morning? Did I not pay enough attention to you last night?" he asked wiggling his eyebrows.

I bit my lip, trying not to smile. "I just need more coffee," I murmured, hiding behind my mug.

"Uh huh," he snickered. "I said it's supposed to be nice. Like almost sixty, nice. And they'll be bands playing all day."

"Yeah, that sounds like fun," I nodded. "Charlie will like the music too."

"Speaking of the little monkey. . . Charlie? Where are you?"

"I'm right here," Charlie announced coming into the room wearing a pair of pajama shorts and a shirt that was too small.

"What are you wearing, buddy?" Edward snorted.

Charlie looked himself up and down. "Cwose," he said matter of factly.

"Um. . ." Edward stood up. "It's a little too cold for those clothes, little man. Let's go change."

"But dis is my favrite," I heard Charlie protest as Edward led him down the hallway.

When they returned, Charlie was dressed in a much more appropriate jeans and a sweatshirt and Edward was wearing his scrubs. I licked my lips and looked him up and down.

It's not like I didn't see him in his scrubs practically every day, but Goddamn he looked good in them.

He caught me ogling and smirked. I stood up and helped Charlie into his boots and coat.

"Work hard at school, baby," I said, kissing his cheek.

"Okay, mommy."

I stood up only to find Edward at my back. "You want me to work hard today too, mommy?" he whispered hotly in my ear.

"I thought you always worked hard," I teased.

He kissed my neck and I felt him twitching against my ass. "I told you, I think about you and get hard. I can't help it." I could barely hear him he was talking so low.

"You're gonna give someone the wrong impression." I turned in his arms and let him wrap his arms around me.

"Am I giving _you_ the wrong impression?"

I giggled. "No, you're definitely giving me the right impression."

Edward chuckled and pressed his lips against mine. "We'll be home around three." Then he adjusted himself before stepping back.

XXXXXX

Saturday morning, we woke to Charlie lying perpendicular in our bed. His head was resting against my arm and his feet at Edward's chest.

Edward groaned when Charlie kicked him. He'd actually been much better and was only climbing into our bed about half the time. We usually didn't even notice him come in, he just showed up.

Edward opened his eyes tiredly. He reached his hand out and pressed his thumb against my lower lip. "Good Morning," he rasped.

I kissed his thumb. "Good morning to you. Is that a small child between us or are you just happy to see me?"

Edward started laughing, which made me laugh. "So funny," he snorted. "I'm always happy to see you, smart ass."

I rolled off my side of the bed, he rolled off his and we left Charlie snoring in the middle.

"Let's go have a coffee date," he whispered taking my hand and dragging me to the kitchen.

I giggled. Edward was being playful. I liked playful Edward.

We ate breakfast, Charlie joining us about twenty minutes later and then made our way to Port Angeles. Edward was right, it really was turning out to be a gorgeous day. There were going to be lots and lots of people out.

When we got there at ten, there was already a band playing. There were food vendors and tents selling everything from knick knacks and trinkets to instruments and their parts.

Edward and I walked hand in hand towards the main stage; with Charlie swinging on Edward's other side.

The festival was being held in a big empty lot next to the Harbor. There were plastic chairs set out everywhere but they were all filled so we just stood and watched. Edward held Charlie on his shoulders for a while and then let him down so he could dance.

I have always loved my son's definition of dance. He sort of looked like a windup toy that got stuck in circle mode as he swung himself around and around, flailing his arms and kicking his feet until he ended up falling down from being dizzy.

Edward picked him up by the arms and set him back down. "You okay, bud?"

Charlie nodded and then started doing it again.

We stayed and listened for a good while and then wandered around some more until we found a snack shack offering hot dogs and pretzels.

"I really need a new string for the piano," Edward said as we passed by the tent for Port Angeles Pianos.

"What's wrong with it?"

"I accidentally stretched the wire too tight when I was tuning it and it snapped."

I wrinkled my nose. "Shouldn't you let a professional do that?" I asked.

Edward put his arm around my shoulders. "I am a professional, baby."

"Yeah, a professional bullshitter," I joked.

Edward tried to look offended, but couldn't quite manage it. We entered the tent and I let my mind wander as Edward told the guy what he needed. While we waited for the guy to look something up Edward started flipping through a catalogue of pianos.

"I want to get one for our house when we move," he said longingly. "Not a big fancy one. Just something that I can keep working with Charlie on."

"Okay," I smiled appeasingly, not wanting to really think about leaving at the moment.

"I gotta go potty," Charlie said grabbing himself and jumping up and down.

I looked around. There were porta potties somewhere, but I didn't know exactly where and there weren't really any trees or bushes that we could hide behind.

"I gotta poop too," he added, putting his other hand on his butt.

"Fabulous," I groaned. "Edward?"

"What, baby," he asked not looking away from the catalogue he was looking through.

"Charlie has to go to the bathroom."

He tilted his head towards me, but his eyes were still planted firmly where they were. "Okay?"

"I'm going to take him to the pizza parlor."

"There's those rent-a-toilet things around here somewhere," he said, finally looking up and glancing around.

"Over that way," the sales guy said pointing off to the side.

"Can you wait two seconds and I'll come with you?"

I walked up behind him and put my hand on his arm. "I know that the catalogue is fascinating, Edward, but can I have you're undivided attention for like, one minute?"

The corners of his lips twitched and with his trademark crooked smile, he dramatically lifted his hands, turned to face me, and stared directly into my yes.

"Yes, baby, you can. What would you like to say?"

I giggled. "No, we can't wait, he has to go poo. I'm not going to let his tiny little butt sit on those nasty ass seats and I'm not going to hover him while he's taking a crap. I'm going to the pizza shop across the street. Is that okay with you?"

His smile faltered a little.

"We'll be gone less than ten minutes. Finish what you're doing, order the bit for the piano, and we'll meet you at the toy tent, okay?

"Bella. . ."

"I can't live my life like this, Edward. You are not my bodyguard and you should not have to escort us to the bathroom. We haven't seen or heard from James in a month. He probably just wanted to scare us."

I could see the indecision in his face, but finally he relented. I think the fact that Charlie's pee-pee dance was turning into a full on pee-pee, poo-poo fit was part of it.

"Fine, but keep your head up, your eyes open, and your phone in your hand."

"I will," I assured.

I turned and saw the look on Charlie's face. We weren't going to make it. I picked him and grunted.

"Geez, you're getting heavy," I laughed.

I ran, carrying him in my arms with my hands under his back and knees. I was afraid to put any pressure on his bladder or bowels at this point for fear of what might happen.

Bursting into the pizza shop, which was fairly busy, I ran to the counter.

"Bathroom?" I begged.

The guy rolling out dough laughed and pointed towards the back hallway. There was someone in there and I kept knocking and knocking until a very disgruntled old man came out.

"I'm sorry," I apologized as I pushed past him and into the bathroom.

We made it with no time to spare. I breathed out a sigh of relief and turned to lock the door as he relieved himself.

_Crisis averted._

We both cleaned our hands and strolled out of the bathroom and into the main parlor at a much more leisurely and comfortable pace. I avoided eye contact with the old guy who we had interrupted, who was sitting in one of the booths we passed.

"Okay, you ready to go find Daddy?" I asked smiling down at him.

"Uh huh. Daddy said he gonna buy me a toy," he chirped.

"Did he?"

Charlie nodded, the cheeky little grin on his face spreading from ear to ear.

I scoffed at my son. You'd think he wasn't just completely overwhelmed by toys after the Christmas he just had. But I had faith that Edward would keep it to one of those dime-store trinkets; a plastic kazoo or something.

We reached the first tent and I was distracted by a gorgeous little crystal music box.

I stopped to pick it up and look at it. Charlie was wiggling, yanking and pulling on my hand. Finally he freed himself from my grip.

"Don't go anywhere, baby," I warned, glancing at him sternly.

I examined the little box carefully. It was so delicate. Nothing too fancy, but you could see the gears inside and etched on the top were two interlocking hearts.

I smiled when I wound it up and it played I Will Always Love You; the song from the Bodyguard.

_Cheesy!_

I set the box back down.

"Okay, let's go." I reached my hand out, but Charlie didn't grab it. I looked down. He wasn't standing where I had told him to stay.

I looked to my other side. No Charlie. My heart stopped. Once it painfully restarted, it was beating so hard I could feel it in my ears. My stomach dropped.

"Charlie?" I called.

The woman in the tent looked at me with a concerned expression.

"Did you see where my little boy went?" I asked, my tongue feeling dry and suddenly too big for my mouth.

"No, I'm sorry," she shook her head.

"Fuck," I whimpered.

"Charlie?" I yelled. "Charlie."

People were looking at me as my panic took over. "Charlie?" There was nothing slow about the progression. My whole body felt like it was about to explode.

I ran a few tents up and then doubled back to make sure that he wasn't really just standing on the outside of the tent. If he was just hiding, we were going to have a serious talk.

_Oh God, oh God, oh God._

I started to feel numb. I couldn't feel anything but my heart which continued to thunder against my chest and my stomach, which was about to expel everything I had consumed in the last twenty-four hours.

Maybe he went back to the pizza shop.

I was really torn. I wanted to go back to see if he was there, but I was afraid to leave the spot where I had last seen him. I approached the girl at the music box tent.

"If he comes back here will you make sure he doesn't leave?" I begged frantically.

"Sure," she nodded. The look on her face was so sympathetic. I didn't want to look at it.

_There's no reason to be sympathetic, there's no reason. He's fine. He's just wandered off. I'm gonna feel like a complete idiot when he shows up at my side._

My legs felt like lead as I tried to run back to the pizza shop. It was like one of those horror movies where you're running towards something and the path keeps getting longer and longer, taking you further and further away.

I wanted to cry, but I couldn't. I needed to find my baby. There were too many people. He was probably scared and crying and wondering where I was and why I wasn't finding him.

I searched the pizza shop high and low, asking everyone in there if they had seen a lost little boy. I searched the bathroom and asked the staff to check the kitchen to see if maybe he had snuck back there.

With no luck, I exited the shop. It had been well over ten minutes. Edward was probably having a heart attack.

_Edward! Edward will know what to do._

I pulled my phone from my purse. My hands were shaking so hard I kept pressing the wrong buttons. Finally I managed to get to Edward's name and hit call.

"Bella? Where the fuck are you? You scared the shit out of me," he said, obviously upset. "That was way more than ten minutes."

"E. . . Edward. I can't find Charlie."

"What do you mean you can't find Charlie?"

"I. . . I can't find him. We were on our way to the toy tent and I stopped to look at something and he just disappeared."

All of the sudden, my vision blurred and I started hyperventilating. It hurt to breathe and I pulled the phone away from my ear, turned abruptly, and vomited into the alley behind me. I gasped for air and I could hear Edward's voice coming from the speaker. I put it back up to my ear, but couldn't talk.

"Bella, baby, you need to calm down," he said unconvincingly.

"I can't," I cried. "I. . . I. . . looked away for less than a minute. I d. . .don't understand where he could have gone."

"Are you sure he didn't go back into the pizza shop?"

"I looked. I've looked everywhere."

"Obviously not everywhere or you would have found him!" Edward snapped.

My lip quivered harder and the tears that I had managed to hold back escaped and flowed down my cheeks in steady streams. I choked back a sob, feeling the burn of bile rising back up my throat again as I looked at all the people walking around.

I knew that he didn't mean to yell at me. He was panicking just like I was.

"Shit, baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap. Where are you? I'm coming to get you. We'll find him, I promise."

I went to lean against the brick wall of the pizza shop, but was violently yanked backwards. I not only felt a pop, but heard it as well and the pain was excruciating. An arm encircled my waist and another around my neck as I was pulled into the shadow of the dark alleyway.

I tried to scream, but I couldn't. There was something covering my mouth and I started to get dizzy. I couldn't keep my eyes open and my body felt heavy and useless. My fingers stopped working, my cell phone dropped to the ground.

I couldn't think about anything other than my baby, who was lost in the crowd somewhere. Every other thought I should have had was fading quickly.

"Come on, baby girl. Just give in," I heard in my ear.

And then everything went black.

XXXXX

EPOV

"Bella? Hey, are you still there?"

Nothing. I could still hear the music and what sounded like the rustling of clothes so I knew her phone was still on, but she wasn't answering me.

"Bella?" I shouted.

Nothing.

There was a loud crash and then I heard a voice. I couldn't make it out, but I knew one thing for sure. It wasn't Bella's. Then the line disconnected.

I tried calling her back, but her phone just rang and rang. On the third try, it went straight to voicemail.

"Fuck!" I yelled, making a few people around me turn to look. Several parents who were standing with their open-mouthed children were giving me dirty looks.

I had no idea what to do. Charlie was lost in the crowd somewhere; Bella was freaking out and was no longer answering her cell phone.

I stared at my phone for a minute.

_What the fuck do I do?_

I scrolled through, finding the Chief's cell number quickly and hitting call.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Chief?" I asked, my voice breaking a little.

"Yeah, what's up, Edward?"

"I have a problem." I had no idea what I sounded like due to the whooshing in my ears, but it must not have been good.

"What kind of problem," he rushed out, obviously picking up on my imminent panic.

"I can't find Bella and Charlie"

"What do you mean you can't find them?"

"We're at the music festival. Bella took Charlie to the bathroom and we were supposed to meet at the toy tent and she never showed. I called her and she said that she lost him. Now I can't get a hold of her either."

I had no idea how it all came out because somewhere in the middle of my explanation, my heart landed in my throat. Something was wrong.

"She lost him? Did she find him?"

"I don't know," I yelled. "She's not answering her phone anymore."

"Well track it."

"Track it?"

"She has the 'MobileMe' application doesn't she?"

Shit, she does.

"I'm heading over there just in case, but track her phone. If she doesn't have Charlie, find the security tent and they'll radio all their guys to be on the lookout."

I got into the location app and typed in Bella's login and password. A few seconds later a google map of Port Angeles popped up showing me where her phone was. It wasn't moving.

_God, please let her have found him._

I zoomed in and found that her signal was coming from an alleyway just across the street from the lot where the festival was, next to the pizza shop they had gone to go to the bathroom. I made my way through the sea of people, pushing them out of the way rudely. I didn't care. I just needed to know that everything was okay.

When the crowd started thinning a little, I broke out into a run. My heart was hammering in my chest. The closer I got, the worse the feeling of dread.

I got to the alleyway and looked down into it.

Nothing.

"Bella?" I yelled. "Charlie?"

I closed my eyes and listened hard.

Nothing.

I searched around and my racing heart nearly flew out of my chest. Bella's phone was lying on the ground.

_Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit._

I picked it up and looked around.

Maybe it just fell out of her pocket.

_Yeah, right, fucker! You shouldn't have let them go by themselves. You knew something like this would happen._

_Security tent. I need to get to the security tent. I have no idea where the security tent is._

I pulled up a photo of Bella and Charlie on my phone.

"Have you seen this woman and child?" I asked the first few people that walked by me.

Each one shook their head and smiled apologetically.

When I got to the first tent, I asked where the security tent was and they pointed me towards the other end of the lot.

_Fuck!_

I kept to the edge of the festival so that I could move more easier, but there were just so many people. Twice I thought that maybe I had found Bella and grabbed these poor women. I apologized profusely and moved on. When I got there, a security officer eyeballed me.

"What can I do for you?" he asked.

I held up my phone. "I. . . I need to find my fiancee and son. They disappeared."

"They. . . disappeared?"

I nodded and swallowed. "My fiancée took our son to the bathroom. She called me half hour ago and said that she'd lost him; that he'd wandered away. Now I can't find her either."

"Does she have a cell phone?" he asked looking closely at the picture.

"I tracked it. It was on the ground. . . . in the alleyway back there." I pointed back towards where I had found the phone.

I was vibrating. Literally, my whole body was bouncing and numb. This was not good. There was a heavy feeling in the pit of my stomach and it slowly began churning.

"Please," I begged.

"How old is your son?"

"Three and a half."

"Your fiancée?"

"Twenty-three."

"What are their names?"

"Charlie Cullen, Charles Anthony, and Bella. . . um, uh. . I mean Isabella Swan," I stuttered. I was trying to get him accurate information, but my mind was all jumbled up.

His eyes narrowed. "Isabella Swan? As in Chief Swan's kid?"

"Yes," I nearly shouted.

_I should have mentioned that five minutes ago._

"I already called him, he's on his way, but he told me to come here and have you guys radio around to find them."

"Okay," he nodded.

I watched as he grabbed a walkie talkie.

"Attention all PA music festival security. We are looking for a missing mother and child. Mother is Isabella Swan, goes by the name of Bella daughter of Forks Police Chief Charles Swan. Twenty-three years old. Five foot. . .

"Four," I supplied. "About one fifteen, one twenty."

"Five four, about one hundred fifteen to one hundred twenty pounds. Long brown hair and . ." he looked at the picture. "Brown eyes."

I nodded when he looked at me for confirmation. "Also looking for a Charles Anthony Cullen, goes by the name of Charlie. Three and half years old. Brownish-red hair, and green eyes. They may or not be together. Ms. Swan reported that the child wandered off about thirty minutes ago. Please report back to security station when found."

_He said when, not if. That's a good sign, right?_

"Okay," he said putting the walkie back down. "I have twenty guys looking for them. If they're here, we'll find them." He handed me back my cell phone.

"Thanks," I said pretending not to hear the "if" in his sentence.

I waited approximately five minutes before I had to move. "I gotta go look for them," I said agitatedly.

"Give me your number. I'll call as soon as we get word."

I gave him my number and then took off towards the car. Maybe she was there.

On the way, I called Chief Swan.

"Did you find them?" he asked the second he picked up the phone.

"Not yet, Chief. I'm still looking. I found Bella's phone in the alleyway across the street."

"An alleyway? What would she have been doing in an alley?"

"I don't know," I nearly cried. "I went to the security. They're looking for them. I'm headed to the car to see if they are there."

"I'll be there in ten minutes. Meet me back at the security tent."

I picked up my pace, but it was pointless. They weren't at the car.

I took a huge frustrated breath and checked my phone to see if I had missed any calls, which I hadn't. I started back towards security going around the opposite side of the lot. It felt like every child I passed could be mine. Every woman with dark hair, was Bella. But every time I looked harder, I was wrong.

By the time I got there, Chief Swan was standing with four other guys, all in uniform. They were regular PAPD officers.

He looked up as I approached. His expression was a mixture of worry and anger.

"Nothing?"

"No. I didn't see them," I said quietly.

"What time exactly did they disappear?"

I scrolled through my phone. "Bella last called me at one twenty-three. Charlie had been gone for only a couple of minutes. The call lasted less than five minutes and then she just stopped talking."

"She hung up?" one of the officers asked.

"Um, no. I think she was talking to someone. I heard someone else."

"What were they doing by themselves, Edward?" Chief Swan yelled. "You swore to me you wouldn't let them go anywhere by themselves."

"She was going to the bathroom," I defended weakly. "There were people everywhere."

"That's no excuse."

"I thought they'd be okay."

"Well obviously you were wrong," he said, his voice hard and accusing.

"Alright, you two can hash this out later," one of the other officers said loudly. I looked at him and realized that he was the Port Angeles Chief of Police."

"Charlie, we're going to find them. It's barely been an hour. They are probably in one of the tents or the surrounding shops," he said firmly.

"No," I groaned. "No, she wouldn't just be wandering around if she'd found him. She'd come find me or leave a note on the car."

Chief Swan looked at me and then at the PA chief. "I am worried that this might not be a coincidence, Rick." He frowned.

Chief Rick nodded. "You think it has to do with James Hunter?"

I jumped. "Of course it does. If that fucker has laid one finger on them. . ."

"Edward, you're not helping," Bella's dad growled effectively shutting me up and dismissing me.

He was obviously angry with me. Of course he was. I had done the one thing that I had sworn I wouldn't do. I let her and Charlie out of my sight. And now they were missing.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. My head felt like it was going to explode.

"I've put out an Amber alert for Charlie," Chief Rick said, glancing over at me. "We're trying to find out the last known vehicle James Hunter had registered in Massachusetts. I've got a road block set up heading out of Port Angeles in both directions."

It was like watching a movie. I listened as all of the law enforcement made a game plan to completely cover the festival grounds and surrounding streets. People were gathering around, watching, whispering, wondering.

I wanted to scream at them to mind their own fucking business; to stop staring and go help find my wife and baby. And that's exactly what she was, I didn't need some fucking piece of paper to tell me.

"Edward?"

"Huh?"

I looked up and saw Chief Swan staring at me. He put his hand on my shoulder. "I need you here, Edward. I need you alert and in control. Please, please don't lose it." His voice was slightly shaky.

I tried to swallow, but my mouth was completely dry. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "I. . .I. ."

"Don't apologize. Not now."

"Okay," I said numbly.

"But when we find them; when we bring them home, you and I are going to have some words. How the fuck could you let them go?" he mumbled.

If he had said it at any other time I probably would have argued that he knew how stubborn Bella was and I certainly would have been intimidated by his words. But at this moment, I could do nothing but nod.

"Now, let's go find our kids."

XXXXXXXX

It had been two hours. No, not two hours; two hours, seven minutes and about thirty-six seconds, since I had last talked to Bella. We had scoured the music festival. We had searched the surrounding businesses top to bottom. We had checked every car, knocked on the doors of every nearby apartment.

And still there was no sign of them. With every second that ticked by a piece of my heart was stripped away like string cheese. This is what all my fucking around had done. Funny how when you're young, you never really think about how what you do will affect your future. Or maybe you just don't care. But when that past comes back to bite you in the ass, then you care. I never considered that I was actually hurting anyone. And even if I had, I don't know that I would have cared.

Chief Swan and I were sitting at the station, waiting. He was on the phone with Jake.

"There's nothing, Jake; not yet. No. There's no point right now, just stay home. Absolutely not! Tell him there's nothing he can do. I know that, but right now he needs to back off. Fine. I'll deal with it when the time comes. I'll call you as soon as we hear anything. Okay. Yeah, thanks. Bye."

He disconnected the call and set his phone on the desk.

I was tired of fucking waiting. I wanted to do something. "I'm going to get some air," I mumbled.

He waved me off without looking up. Instead he was watching the television. By watching, I mean, staring at the news ticker that was scrolling across the bottom of the screen with Charlie and Bella's descriptions and last known locations.

I had called my family. Carlisle was in surgery and promised to get there as soon as possible. I wasn't able to reach mom. Alice and Jasper were in Seattle and were driving back and Rose was violently ill. She told Emmett to come, but I told him to stay. He needed to be with his wife. I swore I'd call him the moment there was any news.

The day had started to cool significantly and I couldn't help but wonder if Charlie was out in it. He wasn't dressed for cooler weather. The nights were always below freezing.

I sat down on the steps and covered my face with my hands. I had never felt so helpless in my entire life. My world was crashing down around me and I had no idea if I was going to come out of the rubble intact. This was my fault. I had no idea what I had done, but it didn't matter. James Hunter wanted revenge. And he was taking it out on the ones I loved the most.

My mind swirled with theories. Regardless of what Tanya had said, the two of them had a relationship of some sort. Was he angry that I had treated her so badly? Angry that I tossed her? I couldn't imagine that. If he loved her, he would have been thrilled that I dumped her so he could have her to himself. Maybe she turned him away because of me. But then, the condom in our bedroom showed that he had been with Cammy. I couldn't imagine that he would be pissed off at me for treating Tanya badly and then turn around and cheat on her. That didn't make sense.

Cammy. Cammy. How the hell did she play into all of this? How long had he followed me?

Did the two of them bond over mutual hatred and decide that fucking with me and Bella would be fun? Destroying our things and having sex in our bed?

I couldn't do it anymore. I stood up and walked briskly to my car throwing myself into the driver's seat. I was about two blocks from the station when I looked in my rear view mirror and nearly crashed the car. Charlie's car seat sat empty. It shouldn't have been empty. This morning he had been in it, singing his ABCs and the Bumble Bee song while Bella showed him the hand gestures. He laughed; he giggled. He made his mother giggle.

_Bella._

I really fucking need her. I needed her to tell me that everything would be alright; that Charlie was safe and that they had simply lost track of time.

_Fat fucking chance._

I drove around, trying not to count the seconds as they ticked by. I scanned every face that was walking down the sidewalk and looked down every side street.

When my phone rang, I startled and accidentally knocked it to the ground. I had to pull over to pick it up.

"Hello," I answered anxiously.

"Edward, you need to come down to the station," Chief Swan's voice came through the receiver. I couldn't tell by his tone what was going on.

"Why?" I asked hesitantly.

"Charlie was just brought in."

"What?" I barked. Relief flooded through my system and I blew out an almost painful breath.

"He's okay?" I choked.

"Yes, son, it appears as though he is."

"Thank God," I whispered.

Closing my eyes I asked the next question. "What about Bella?"

I heard him breathing heavily and my heart sank. "Not yet. They weren't together."

_They weren't together. They weren't together. Fuck. Why weren't they together?_

"Wh. . wh. . who found him?"

"Edward, just get over here."

His tone left no room for argument.

"I'm on my way. Five minutes."

I wanted to be elated. I was elated. My son was safe and in a few minutes he would be in my arms, but. . .

But where is Bella?

I pulled into the parking lot of the station and bolted to the front door. Stepping into the hallway, I could hear the commotion inside and then I heard the voice that made my blood freeze.

"I'm not talking to any of you. Let me talk to Edward!" I heard her scream.

I walked to the door so that I could see in, but she couldn't see me.

"Ma'am, please calm down," one of the officers standing next to her said as he reached out to her.

"If you touch me again I'm going to press charges," she threatened.

"You can't talk to Edward right now, Tanya," Chief Swan told her.

"Why not?"

"Because he's not here."

"But he's coming back here, right? I mean, he has to come back because I found Charlie and brought him here."

She had found Charlie? Accidentally? I almost had to laugh.

"Miss Denali," I heard Detective Laurent start.

I'd heard all I needed to hear. "It's fine, I'll talk to her," I growled pushing my way forward.

Her eyes lit up when she saw me. "Oh, thank God, Edward. Please tell these assholes that I did not steal your child."

I lifted my eyebrows and scoffed. "Why? Why would I tell them that?"

She looked at me incredulously. "Are you kidding me? Why would I steal him? I found him, completely alone, wandering away from the music festival. It's obvious his mother either lost him or abandoned him."

I held back the fury that wanted to rip its way from my chest.

"Oh, you just found him? Well isn't that real fucking convenient?"

"I did!" she said, looking at me pleadingly. "Edward, please. You know I'd never do anything to hurt you. I found him. I knew who he was and I wanted to find you. I knew you'd be worried."

"And it took you two and half hours to turn him in?"

"We were looking for you at the festival."

"Bullshit," I yelled. "There was security all over that place looking for him, if he was there, we would have found him."

She frowned and looked frustrated.

"I don't know why nobody found us, but we were there and we were looking for you and then we walked down the street looking for you in the shops."

"Why didn't you take him to the security booth? It didn't cross your mind that if he was missing that we would have reported it?"

"I. . . I . . ."

I raised my eyebrows at her.

"You what?"

"I didn't think of that, okay? I was trying to help. I was trying to bring him back to you."

"Where's Bella?" I asked quietly.

Tanya laughed. "Why are you asking me?"

"Because, I don't buy for a motherfucking minute that you don't know. What did James do with her?"

"James? James who?"

"Tanya?" I warned.

She let out a loud gasp. "James Hunter? You think James Hunter had something to do with this?" Her voice was innocent, but I knew better.

I clenched my jaw.

"Oh, Edward, I'm so sorry. He's psychotic." There was a hint of amusement in her voice that made me want to rip her head off. "Do you really suspect he took her?"

"Where is she, Tanya?" I yelled.

"I don't know," she screamed back. "I don't know where she is. God! You can at least say thank you. I didn't have to bring your little bastard back to you."

White noise. That is what filled my rage-addled mind as I flew across the room. Her body slammed against the wall, my hand at her throat.

"Edward!" Chief Swan barked. His voice was fuzzy though and I couldn't see anything but the wide blue eyes of the woman in front of me. I always thought that the phrase 'seeing red' was a myth. It's not.

I felt hands on my shoulders; on my arms, but I held my grip. Tanya was gasping and choking dramatically, but I knew my own strength. I wasn't putting nearly the pressure on her that I wanted to.

"If he does anything to Bella. ANYTHING. I will make sure you spend the rest of your life paying for it," I snarled before letting her go and letting myself be dragged backwards and forced into a chair. Chief Swan sat down next to me, gripping my shoulder.

Tanya grabbed at her throat.

"Why didn't you care this much about me?" she screeched, tears starting to form in her eyes. "I did nothing but love you for years and it was always her! It should have been me. Charlie should be my baby, not hers. She doesn't deserve him, she doesn't deserve you!"

"And who does, Tanya? You?" I laughed angrily. There was nothing funny about this situation though.

"Yes, me! We were always supposed to be together. You were supposed to get it all out of your system. Sow your wild oats or whatever the fuck it is and then settle down with me. Not her. This. . ." she said widening her arms. "This was to show you how much I love you and make you realize how much you need and love me. I am the one who brought your son back to you. She abandoned him. She let herself get taken by that sick fuck! I hope you never get her back."

I'm not sure who moved first, but both Bella's dad and I were on our feet. Almost the entire Port Angeles police force was practically on top of us.

"That's enough!" Detective Laurent bellowed. "Get her out of here."

"Wait, where is she going?" I asked. "You're not going to let her go are you?"

"Sit down, Mr. Cullen," he ordered.

"I don't want to fucking sit down. I want to know where Bella is," I roared. "I want you to find my fucking wife!"

Tanya turned so fast she must have given herself whiplash. "What?" she gaped. "Your wife? When. . . How. . . I would have known. You _married_ her?"

Her voice was like nails on a chalkboard, I winced, but didn't respond to her. I didn't even look at her.

"Out!" Laurent ordered.

Tanya squirmed away from their grip, but she allowed herself to be taken away. To where, I didn't know.

I turned around and saw that Chief Swan was seated again with his hands over his face. It was then that I realized that I wasn't alone in this. Yes, she was the love of my life, but she was his only daughter. He had to be hurting just as much as I was.

"Fuck!" I groaned, collapsing back into the chair. "FUCK!" I gripped my hair and pulled as hard as I could.

"Edward?" My mother's voice called. I looked up and saw that she and Carlisle were standing at the entrance of the station, a cop holding them back and looking towards us. Detective Laurent nodded and the officer let them go.

"Oh, honey," she sobbed, wrapping her arms around me. "I'm so sorry. I was running errands and left my phone at home. Have they found them?"

I couldn't talk. I could feel myself about to lose it and that just couldn't happen. Not yet.

"Charlie's safe," Chief Swan said quietly.

I stood up.

Charlie. I needed to get to Charlie.

"And Bella?" Mom whispered.

I tilted my head to look at the chief. Our eyes met briefly before I closed them again and shook my head. "Not yet."

"Oh God," Mom choked.

The phone on Detective Laurent's desk rang and I jumped.

"Yeah. Okay. Great, I'll tell him. Thank you."

"What?" I asked anxiously.

"The therapist is on her way to talk to Charlie. We need to take him to the hospital."

"Hospital? Therapist?" Carlisle asked, anxiously. "Why? What happened to him?"

I squeezed my eyes together again and grit my teeth. I could feel the pressure building behind my eyeballs. The tears that streamed down my cheek couldn't be stopped.

"As far as we can tell, he's fine, physically. You're a doctor, Dr. Cullen, you know the drill," Laurent explained.

"Yes, I do, but right now. . .I'm a grandfather, nothing else."

"Where is he?" I asked.

"One of our officers took him next door. Ms. Denali wanted to speak to you and we thought it best that Charlie not be exposed to that. From the display the two of you just put on, I'm exceptionally happy that we took the precaution."

"Are you coming with us?" I asked, my voice almost unrecognizable with emotion.

Detective Laurent nodded. "Yes, I need to be there when the therapist talks to him."

"Do you want us to. . ." my mom's voice trailed off.

"Will you meet us at the hospital?"

She nodded and smiled sadly.

"Chief?"

He looked up, his eyes were red and bloodshot. He looked so much older.

"Uh, I'll drive myself. I want to be able to come back if. . ." he swallowed like he had something caught in his throat. "_When_ they find Bella."

I followed Detective Laurent out into the hallway and towards the office next door.

"Don't ask him any questions about what happened, Edward. Let the therapist do that."

"Why? I need to know what she did to him; what she said."

"You will. Leslie Ripley is the child psychologist, let her find out without scaring him. And whatever you do, don't tell him his mother's missing."

I glared up at him. "I wouldn't do that, I'm not a fucking idiot."

He held up his hand in apology and then shoved open the door.

Charlie was sitting at a desk coloring with a female officer. His head popped up and he grinned.

"Daddy," he cried, running towards me. I picked him up and held him tightly, the tears starting to spill again.

He leaned back, putting both his tiny hands on my cheeks. "Wassa matter, Daddy?"

"I was just scared because you were missing, buddy. But we're gonna be okay. Everything's gonna be okay."

I wasn't sure if I was trying to convince him or myself.

"Where's Mommy?"

_Shit, what do I tell him?_

The female officer that had been looking after him must have read the panic on my face.

"Your mommy's not here right now, sweetheart. You're daddy's going to take you to the hospital to see a doctor now, okay?"

Charlie frowned. "Do I hafta get a shot?"

I chuckled a little. "No, buddy, no shots."

We walked out to the parking lot and passed Tanya's car. I wanted to take a fucking brick to the windshield, but I was already worried about being charged with assault for attacking her.

I halted abruptly. There were toys in the back seat.

Detective Laurent was behind me and nearly ran into me. "What's the matter?"

I pointed to the car.

"Yeah? So?"

"Tanya doesn't have any kids."

"Okay?" He was looking at me like I was wasting his time.

"Why does she have toys in her car?"

"Would she have bought them for him?"

I narrowed my eyes at him. Did Tanya really seem like the type that would buy a child toys?

He looked at me for a minute and then back to the car. He pulled out his cell phone.

"Yeah, it's Laurent. Call Judge Kaplan, get a search warrant for Tanya Denali's car, one for her home and her parent's home as well. No, don't. Hold onto her until I come back. I want to be the one who questions her. Okay, thanks."

We reached my car and I buckled Charlie into his seat. The same seat that had seemed so empty half an hour before. I yanked on the buckle to make sure it was secure and pressed my lips against his temple, letting them linger long enough to make him pull away and wrinkle his nose.

"Daaaady," he whined, wiping his head.

I smiled. "I love you, buddy, you know that?"

He grinned. "I love you too," he chirped.

I stood up and saw that Detective Laurent had been watching the interaction. "You ready to go?" he asked more softly than I had heard him speak before.

"No, but I don't have a choice, do I?"

We climbed in and drove silently towards the hospital.

My parents and Chief Swan were already in the waiting room when we got there. Alice and Jasper had joined them, but I couldn't stop to talk to them. I was pulled straight into the Emergency Department and into one of the examination rooms.

"You're father is requesting to come back, is that okay?" the nurse asked peeking her head into the room.

"Yes," I nodded.

A few minutes later Carlisle sat down next to me. Charlie was on my lap, looking around nervously. He was oddly quiet.

The nurse came in and explained to him what she was doing as she took his temperature. She also took his weight and height and handed him a tiny little hospital gown to put on.

"Doctor Fitzgerald will be here in just a few minutes," she smiled softly.

I changed him into the gown, looking over his body to make sure there weren't any obvious injuries. He had bruises on his knees and shins, and a scrap on his elbow, but nothing out of the ordinary.

If Tanya had laid one hand on my child there was no force on this planet that would hold me back from destroying her.

When the Doctor came in, he let Charlie stay in my lap while he examined him. Detective Laurent remained in the corner of the room silently.

He looked over his entire body and asked him to stand up. He removed his gown and I froze when he moved to look at his genitals.

I felt Carlisle's hand on my back. "It's standard, son," he whispered in my ear.

"I know that," I mumbled. "Doesn't make me feel any better."

"You know that no one's supposed to touch your private parts, right Charlie?" he asked. "Only a doctor when you're getting a check-up and mommy or daddy if there's something wrong or to help you clean yourself, right?"

Charlie nodded. I remembered Bella telling me that she had gone over private parts with him, but it still scared the shit out of me to think about it.

"Has anyone else ever touched your private parts?" Dr. Fitzgerald asked.

Charlie shook his head no and I let out a relieved breath. I'd kill any motherfucker who touched my son. Consequences be damned.

"We're all done, Charlie," Dr. Fitzgerald smiled. "When you're all dressed there's a treasure box at the nurses' station that you can pick from, okay?"

Charlie nodded enthusiastically.

"Mr. Cullen, Detective, will you come with me?"

I stood up and handed Charlie to Carlisle. "Can you get him dressed please, Dad?"

"Sure," he agreed, taking Charlie into his arms.

In the hallway, the doctor looked at me. "There doesn't appear to be any physical injury. The therapist will be able to talk to him a bit more about it and can assess if anything was said or done to him. How long was he gone for?"

"Just over two hours." I frowned.

"And his mother's still missing?"

I swallowed thickly. "Yes."

"But he doesn't know?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Okay, well, like I said, physically he's fine and there weren't any behavioral triggers that would make me think that he was assaulted."

This was bordering on too much. I sucked in air and clenched my fists.

Both men looked at me. I'm sure they were waiting for me to explode. It was going to happen; it was just a matter of time.

The door opened and Carlisle poked his head out. Dr. Fitzgerald nodded that it was okay and the door was opened wider as Charlie bounded out and towards the nurses' station.

I watched as all the women fawned over him and tried to help him pick out a toy.

"Edward," Detective Laurent said, drawing half of my attention away from Charlie. There was no way I was taking my eyes off of him.

There was a woman standing next to him. She was short, brunette and probably late thirties.

"Edward, this is Leslie Ripley, the child therapist who is going to talk to Charlie."

"Hi," I said, reaching out for her hand.

"Daddy, wook what I got," Charlie shouted. He was holding up his hands and they both held items.

"What do you have?" I asked, bending down. "Issa tattoo, jus wike yours."

I laughed. "Just like mine?"

He nodded, eyes wide, smile in place. "Can you put it on me?"

I was going to answer, but the therapist, Leslie interrupted me.

"Hi, Charlie, my name's Leslie."

Charlie looked at me and I nodded encouragingly. "Hi," he said quietly.

"What else do you have?" she asked, pointing to his other hand.

"A dino. It says rawr!" he said, holding it up.

"Wow, that's so cool. Why don't we head over to this way and you can show me better."

She led us to one of the private family waiting rooms. It was small, but big enough for Detective Laurent and I to stand out of the way.

"Do you want to draw with me?" she asked as she sat down on one of the chairs.

Charlie bit his lip and nodded. Leslie handed him a piece of white paper and some crayons that had been on a bookshelf.

"I heard that you have had a very busy day," she said setting down some crayons. "Do you think you can draw a picture of your day?"

Again, Charlie nodded. He picked up a crayon and started drawing.

"Can you tell me about what you're drawing?"

"We wenta hear music," Charlie said, dragging his crayon over the paper.

"Oh yeah? And then what happened."

"I hadda go poop."

"Oh my goodness, did you guys get to the potty?"

He nodded. "Yeah, mommy made a big man mad."

I furrowed my brow. "What man?" I asked.

Leslie turned and shook her head at me.

"Sorry," I mouthed.

"How did she make the man mad?"

"He was in da potty and she knocked a wot."

"Oh, well, I bet you had to go real bad."

Charlie nodded.

"Where did you go after the potty?"

"Mommy wooked at a box."

"What kind of a box?"

Charlie shrugged.

"You didn't get to see it?"

"I got wost."

"Oh? How did you get lost?"

Charlie looked uncomfortable. I wanted to tell her to stop, but Laurent shook his head at me.

"I don't know."

"Did somebody pick you up?"

He nodded and then shook his head no again.

"Did somebody take you away from your mommy?"

"She said mommy got wost too."

"Who said, Charlie?"

"Daddy's friend."

"Oh?" I watched as Leslie picked up four crayons. Black, Brown, Red, and Yellow. "Can you tell me what color your daddy's friend's hair was?"

Charlie picked up the yellow crayon and handed it to her.

_Tanya. It could only have been her._

I rubbed my eyes. The bitch had taken him right out from under Bella. She had to have been prepared; watching, waiting for her chance.

I glanced at Laurent. He was taking notes, his face stoic and unrevealing.

"Did she tell you what her name was?"

Charlie shook his head.

"Were you scared when you were lost?"

Charlie shook his head no again.

"You weren't? Not even a little bit?"

He shook his head again.

"Well, how come?"

"Daddy said he'd fine me," he shrugged.

"He'd find you?"

"He said dat if I got wost wike Nemo, he'd fine me."

I took in a shaky breath and felt my eyes start to water again. I had no idea he'd actually remember me saying that.

"Wow. You have an awesome daddy, don't you?"

Charlie nodded and looked up to grin at me. I wiped my eyes and smiled back.

"Did you meet anybody else when you were lost?"

Charlie shook his head. "No."

"What did you and Daddy's friend talk about?"

He shrugged again.

"Did you talk about Daddy?"

Charlie didn't answer.

"It's okay, Charlie. If you remember, will you tell me?"

"Uh huh," he said blankly.

"Where did you go with Daddy's friend?"

"To da car."

"To her car?"

"Uh huh."

"Did you drive somewhere?"

"I don't know."

Listening to the conversation was making me sick. He wasn't giving us anything.

"Charlie, did Daddy's friend touch you or hurt you?"

My ears perked up.

"No, she towd me she'd not hurt me. She towd me she loved me."

Leslie frowned and sat back.

"She told you that she loved you?"

"Yeah, um. . .cause I was pieces of Daddy and. . ." he bit his lip and narrowed his eyes. "and she would care bout me. I want Mommy," he suddenly cried, his mouth trembling and his eyes filling with tears.

Leslie looked up at me, making eye contact. "I think we're done for now," she whispered.

I nodded and moved to pick Charlie up. He wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in my neck as he continued to sniffle.

"Can we take him home?" I asked, looking at Laurent as we walked towards the waiting room.

"Yes. I think that's a good idea. We'll let you know if we need anything further. Just keep an ear out."

"I'll tell my mom," I agreed.

"Edward?" he stopped me. "You need to go home with your son."

I turned my head as far away from Charlie as I could and leaned in to Laurent.

"If you think for one second that I'm going to go rest while some psychopath is doing God knows what to. . ." I wouldn't say her name. I was speaking in barely a whisper, but Charlie had sharp ears. ". . . to her; you are dead wrong."

"You need to be with your son," he said firmly. We started walking again and when we got into the waiting room, my family rushed us. I handed Charlie to my mother and turned to face Laurent.

"My son is safe; he's okay. His mother is not. If I can do anything for my child, it will be to bring his mommy home. So excuse me, but Fuck off!"

I turned to leave and realized that the entire waiting room was staring at me. Charlie's eyes were wide and for a moment I feared that he had heard what I had said. I hadn't realized that I had practically screamed the last couple of words.

I made eye contact with my mom, who shook her head minutely, telling me that she didn't think he had. I walked over to him and took him.

"I'm going to send you home with Gramma and Papa, okay?"

His face fell and my heart broke. "Is mommy at home?" he asked quietly.

"No, buddy," I rasped. "Mommy's not at home, not right now."

"Where is she?"

I felt another tear fall down my face and I wiped it away.

"Don't worry about it right now, okay? We'll be home soon, I promise."

I clenched my jaw to keep from sobbing as Carlisle took him from me again.

He patted me on the back.

"I need to give you the car seat," I mumbled.

We made our way out to the parking lot and I said goodbye to my family.

"Are you sure you don't want us to stay with you?" Alice asked.

"No." I shook my head. "There's not a whole lot to be done right now."

"We could play cards? Or. . . just hang," she suggested with a sad smile.

I kissed her cheek. "I'll be fine. I'll call you when I hear something."

"Okay." Alice hesitated.

"Sugar, there's nothing we can do from here," Jasper said into her hair.

"Can we drive around? Maybe look for her?"

"Sure, baby," he drawled. He tilted his head to me and I returned the gesture.

XXXXXXXXX

Time had never moved more slowly. It seemed like every time I looked up at the clock on the wall only a few seconds had past.

I could see the people around me trying to be sly about their glances. Whether they were worried or curious or annoyed at the fact that I was popping my knuckles or drumming my fingers, I don't know.

The sunlight began to fade, bathing the station in the haze of twilight before disappearing all together. I sat on a hard wooden chair with my feet propped out in front of me, my arms folded across my chest and closed my eyes. I was zoning in and out, attempting to push all of the horrifying thoughts about what was happening out of my head. I shifted position, sitting up and resting my elbows on my bouncing knees, my hands folded in front of my mouth.

The crackle of a nearby scanner made both Chief Swan and I look up.

"This is Officer Nicholas in pursuit of suspect vehicle heading East on the 101, two miles east of 7 Cedars Casino. Vehicle is a black 2001 Dodge Charger with Washington plates. Suspect is believed to be James Hunter, wanted in connection with the disappearance of Isabella Swan. All available officers please respond. Vehicle is approaching speeds of one hundred ten miles per hour. Suspect is considered armed and dangerous."

There was a flurry of activity as all the "available" officers grabbed their coats and guns and keys and flew out the door. I took my cue and did the same.

"Edward?" I heard Chief Swan call. He wasn't making a move to get up.

"I'll drive," I said without looking at him.

"Edward?"

I ignored him. I knew what he was going to say.

"Are you coming?" I asked, pausing. When he didn't answer me I started for the door.

"Edward, you can't go!" Chief Swan yelled.

"Like hell I can't," I snapped.

"Do you want to get her killed?" he asked, grabbing my arm. I hadn't even realized he was coming towards me. "Because that's exactly what could happen if you go out there. He wants _you_. He wants to hurt you for whatever reason and if you go out there, I have no doubt that he has the potential to take her out in front of you."

"I can't just sit here and wait, Chief. I can't," I cried.

"You're going to have to. We both are. I want to be out there just as much as you do, but I want my daughter to come home safe even more, so sit your ass down and let them do their jobs."

I leaned backwards and collapsed against the wall, sinking down.

"What if he kills her?" I whimpered. "What if he's already killed her?"

"Just. . . just get up, son." He held out his hand and pulled my sad, exhausted, pathetic body from the ground. Before I had a chance to react he pulled me into a hug.

There were no words.

This man. . . this man who had spent years hating me for what I had done to his daughter; who had wanted to kill me not so long ago, was now comforting me as we waited to find out if she was alive or dead. After a couple of minutes, he let me go and wiped his face, before we went back to Chief Rick's desk and sat down.

I waited. We waited. The station around us was eerily quiet. There were only a few people milling around; the administration staff and file clerks. All of the officers on duty had been called out to the situation with James.

The scanner had been turned off, but I couldn't stand it anymore, I needed to at least hear something. I shouldn't have ever asked the clerk to turn it back on. What I heard made my blood run cold.

"Suspect is in custody. Dispatch we need a bus for twenty-three year old female victim."

"Motherfucker," I cried, grabbing my hair and pulling. My whole body was shaking. I wanted to throw the scanner across the room, but then I wouldn't know.

"ETA four minutes," the dispatcher announced. "What's her condition?"

"Unresponsive, but breathing. Breaths are shallow. Pulse rate is low. Working to free her now."

"Free her?" I asked. "What do they mean, free her?"

I turned to look at the chief, but he just shook his head, his jaw slack.

"I just removed her gag. There are injuries to the face."

"Arms are now free, looks as though she may have a dislocated shoulder. Bus just pulled up. We're good. ETA at OMC is twenty-five minutes. Detective Laurent has suspect and will be returning to PAPD after he's examined for injuries."

I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Edward, son, let's go."

I nodded. I couldn't allow myself to feel relieved yet. I had no idea what he had done to her. Her father must have been on the same wavelength.

We drove back to Olympic Medical Center in silence. It only took us five minutes, which left us pacing outside of the ER doors. I heard the sirens long before I saw them.

Several doctors came out into the ambulance bay including Dr. Fitzgerald.

"This Charlie's mother?" he asked solemnly.

"Yes," I responded.

"Okay, I'm gonna need both of you to step back. You can follow us in, but stay out of the way. We need to assess her injuries before you can see her."

We both agreed, although I wondered if I'd actually be able to do it.

The sirens got louder and finally, the ambulance pulled up. Everyone rushed around as the doors opened.

"Isabella Swan, twenty-three years old. She's been unresponsive since we picked her up. Blood Pressure 80/50, heart rate 65. Pulse ox 85. Found bound and gagged, possible drug exposure."

I tried to see past them as they brought the gurney out of the ambulance.

"Laceration and bruises to the face, dislocated right shoulder."

Someone stepped away, I didn't know if it was an EMT, a nurse or a doctor, but whoever it was gave me a horrifying view. Bella's neck was in a brace, her head strapped to the gurney. Her eyes were closed and her face was speared with blood. Her shirt had been torn open and her right shoulder was purple and swollen.

She was so pale, almost blue. "Oh fuck!" I gasped, swallowing down the bile that had burned its way up my throat.

"Christ," I heard the chief breathe out.

The team of doctors rushed her inside. We followed silently. I didn't want to get kicked out and, to be honest, I was really too stunned to react. I watched numbly as they transferred her onto a bed and began to work on her.

They used scissors to slice through her jeans and shirt and removed them. Someone's fingers started prodding her ribs and abdomen. I could only assume they were checking for internal injuries. One of the doctors reset her shoulder with a pop and I winced. When they hooked up the monitors, loud beeps instantly filled the room. I listened to the sound carefully.

"Her heart rate's too low," I murmured.

"I know," Chief Swan answered.

I should have been paying attention to everything they were doing. I wanted to be a doctor for God's sake. I should have been, but I wasn't. I was focused on her chest; watching it rise and fall; listening to the heart rate monitor.

"She's stable," Dr. Fitzgerald said calmly, pulling off his gloves and tossing them into a waste bin.

"Why's she bleeding?" I asked quietly.

"She's got a couple of lacerations. The blood on her face is from her nose and lip."

"When will she wake up?" I heard the chief ask.

"I don't know. We're going to run some tests. It doesn't appear that she sustained head trauma, but we're going to do a CT scan anyway. Better to be safe. Initial examination doesn't reveal any internal bleeding, but again, the CT scan can confirm that. We. . . we're also going to have to do a sexual assault exam," he added cautiously.

I snapped my head towards him. "Was she. . . ?"

"We don't know. That's what we're hoping to find out. We need to do the exam as soon as possible though."

I cleared my throat. The thought that Bella was. . . I couldn't. . . It wasn't something I could process.

"This needs to be done, Edward," the chief murmured. "The sooner, the better."

I shook my head. "I don't want her to be awake for it. Please don't let her be awake for it."

"I'm just waiting for my nurse to finish with her patient. When she's ready, we'll do the collection."

I started to feel sick again. "Just. . . get it over with."

He nodded. "I've got some forms you need to fill out."

I followed Dr. Fitzgerald to the admitting desk and sat down to fill out Bella's paper work.

I wasn't prepared for what I encountered when I got back up.

James Hunter.

James Hunter was sitting on a bed in one of the rooms with a doctor stitching up his head. I didn't even think as I strode into the room. Our eyes met and his widened for a moment. He pulled away from the doctor and flailed, knocking over a few trays and sending things flying. He was fast, but not fast enough. Well, that, and the fact that he was actually handcuffed to the bed. And the cops standing to the side obviously hadn't been expecting me either.

I flew at him and landed one very nice fantastic punch to his eye socket before I was pulled backwards.

"MOTHERFUCKER!" I roared, thrashing against the guys who were holding onto me.

James squinted in pain. There was blood pouring down the side of his face from where I had re-opened what the doctor had just tried to fix. He licked his lips. The doctor was pressed firmly against the wall, trying to stay out of the way.

"What the fuck did you do to her?"

James looked down and then back up at me, his face breaking out into a horrible smirk.

"Nothing she didn't want me to do, man," he chuckled. "Man, your girl is smokin. Especially when she's mad."

I let out some sort of inhuman howl before finally being dragged from the room.

"You had better settle the fuck down," I heard my brother's voice loudly in my ear.

_My brother?_

"Emmett?"

"Yeah, bro. I'm not letting you go until you settle down, though."

I tried to get one more look at James, but they had closed up the room.

"I can't believe they let that asshole in the same building as Bella," I growled.

I took a few breaths and relaxed my body. I looked back towards the room.

"Don't," Emmett warned. "I don't want to have to lay you out in the middle of the ER."

"I'm not," I assured. "I'm just pissed."

"Yeah, you have every right to be, but now your ass may end up in jail right next to his for assault."

"He deserved it."

Emmett sighed and shook his head.

"What the hell are you doing here? I thought Rose was sick?" I didn't mean to sound ungrateful, I was just surprised.

"She was. She's asleep right now. Alice is with her. I stopped by the station and they said you were here with Bella. Why the hell didn't you tell us they found her?"

"Because all I was thinking about was getting to her and making sure she was okay," I snapped.

He raised his hands. "Relax, man. You look like shit. How is she?"

"Thanks a lot," I said sarcastically. "I feel like shit. She's fucked up. . . and unconscious. I have no idea."

I looked up as Chief Swan approached. "Emmett," he nodded.

"Chief."

"They, uh, they just finished the exam," he mumbled.

My heart started thumping.

"Was she. . ."

"No. She wasn't," he rushed out.

"Oh, thank God," I breathed.

"What?" Emmett asked, looking between us.

I ignored him. I didn't want to have to tell him that Bella had just had a rape kit done. Even if it was negative, that shit was personal.

"James Hunter is here."

"I know," the chief frowned. "Stay away from him, Edward. Don't get yourself into any trouble."

"Uh. . ."

He groaned and rubbed his eyes.

"Sorry." I felt like a child being scolded by my father, or a teacher, or. . . the chief of police.

"Are you really that much of an idiot?"

Emmett coughed and I glared at him.

"Yes," I admitted.

He took a deep breath through his nose and changed the subject.

"They're taking Bella for a CT and then she'll be taken to the ICU until she wakes up. It's eight o'clock. Why don't you go home."

"No!" I said flatly. "I need to know why he did this."

"You don't have to be here for that."

"I can't face Bella until I know exactly what I did to put her and Charlie in danger." I spoke slowly and clearly so that he knew that there was no way he was getting me to leave. "I want to be there when they question him."

He scratched his jaw and looked at the ceiling.

"That's not up to me."

"Then where's Laurent?"

He looked around. "I don't know."

"Bella's not going to wake up for a few hours?" I couldn't bear the thought of her waking up without me there.

"Probably not," he shrugged.

"I'm going to find him. Emmett, you wanna come?"

"Yeah, Ed, whatever you need," he said, patting me on the back.

"You'll call me if she starts to wake up?"

Chief Swan nodded. "Of course."

An hour later Emmett and I were back at the station trying to convince Detective Laurent to let us watch the interrogation.

"Fine," he finally agreed. "But you stay behind the glass and you keep your mouth shut or I will have you forcibly removed from this station. Do you understand?"

I nodded just once to show him that I understood.

He opened the door to the interrogation room and walked purposefully inside.

"Mr. Hunter."

James lifted his head and looked at Detective Laurent. He let out a sneering chuckle and rolled his eyes.

"You are in a lot of trouble."

"Yeah, tell me something I don't fucking know," he growled.

"Why don't you tell me something that I don't know instead."

"Like what? You guys always have the answers, right? That's why I'm here. What could I possibly have to tell you?"

"How bout why you abducted Isabella Swan?"

He shrugged and smiled. "You want me to give you my motive? Do you think I'm an idiot?"

"I think you got yourself into something you didn't anticipate."

"What-the-fuck-ever, dude. You don't know shit."

Detective Laurent sat down and slammed his hand flat against the table. James startled slightly, but didn't react otherwise.

"Let me tell you what I know. I know that you've been following Ms. Swan around for months. I know that you broke into her apartment, had sex with Camille Jenks in her and Mr. Cullen's bed and I know that you were found with her bound and gagged in your car."

I expected James' face to remain calm and cool. He knew what he was up against, but instead, his mask slipped.

"What?" he bellowed. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Which part, Mr. Hunter?"

"Who the fuck is Camille Jenks? I didn't fuck anybody in Cullen's bed."

"Oh no?"

"Fuck no," he shouted.

"But you admit to breaking into the apartment."

"I'm not admitting to any fucking thing."

"A condom with yours and Ms. Jenks' DNA was found in Ms. Swan and Mr. Cullen's bedroom. Would you care to explain how it got there if you didn't put it there?"

"First off. . .who the fuck is this girl I supposedly had sex with?"

I watched as Detective Laurent pulled a small photo of Cammy out of his folder and set it down in front of James.

"Ah, hell no. That's the bitch that died. She was sick. She drugged dudes with families."

"So how did a condom with your DNA and hers end up in the Swan/Cullen apartment?"

"I admit I fucked her, but it was at her place. I got the hell out of dodge and never saw her again. There's no way . . ." James' face shifted and he looked absolutely livid.

"That bitch!"

"What bitch?" Laurent asked.

"That motherfucking, two-faced lying bitch. I knew she had something else planned."

"Mr. Hunter?"

"Fuck no; she wants me to go down for it? I don't fucking think so." James stood up and started pacing.

"Mr. Hunter?"

"Tanya Denali. She planned the whole fucking thing."

"What thing?"

"She knew I wanted revenge on Cullen. She fucking knew I'd do anything to make him pay," he ranted angrily

"Pay? Pay for what, Mr. Hunter?"

James approached the glass that I was standing behind. It was like he was staring me directly in the eyes, but I knew that he couldn't see me.

His ice blue eyes were cold and calculating, but I wasn't prepared for the pain that seemed to be hidden within them. He closed his eyes and turned away again, sitting back down across from Laurent.

"Dude," Emmett murmured next to me.

"He stole my fucking life right out from underneath me."

"How exactly did he do that, Mr. Hunter?"

I watched him as he swallowed.

I scratched my jaw nervously, waiting for him to tell me what I had done. When he opened his mouth, I stopped breathing.

"He fucked my wife."

XXXXXX

**AN: **

**Uh. . . . .I don't know what else to say here. I'd love to hear your thoughts. **

**Next week is some BPOV.**


	36. The Aftermath of Assumptions

**AN: I had a whole bit written out here and then FFnet deleted it. B**ch. **

**Anyway. Thank yous go out to the usual suspects: Mol****lie, who helped me through the tears and frustration of this chapter when it just would not come together properly. She really deserves co-author credits on this one. **

**Melee03 did my Nemo pictease and of course, pre-reads, supports my emo ass, all of that. **

**LaMomo did a fantastic review of UP on tehlemonadestand(dot)blogspot(dot)com as well as some last minute pre-reading and comforting. :oD **

**There are all sorts of people rec'ing and pimping me out there including knicnort3. I give big kisses to you all.**

**Also, Mina Rivera made UP a beautiful banner. It's on my profile. Thank you, dear.**

**For everyone reviewing. Thank you, Whether you liked it or not. :oD **

**After last weeks high, this chapter's gonna start taking you back down. **

**Ever have one of those weeks where your confidence is super low? Yeah, that's me this week so please go easy on me. **

**If you notice any problems w/ the chapter format, please PM me right away so I can fix it. I've been having trouble with my upload tonight. Thanx.**

**Disclaimer as usual.**

**XXXXX**

Chapter 34: The Aftermath of Assumptions

EPOV

_"He fucked my wife!"_

My mouth fell open. I had done what?

Out of my periphery I saw my brother face me and I turned my head slightly to look at him. His expression had to have mirrored mine; shock and disbelief.

There was another detective on the other side of him. I was pretty sure that I had seen him with Laurent before, but I couldn't remember. He glanced at me and then his eyes quickly shifted back to James and Laurent.

"Dude, you were messin with married women?" Emmett hissed. His nose wrinkled up in utter disgust.

I shook my head slightly and swallowed.

"Edward? What the fuck?"

I looked back at James as if he had just sprouted two heads. The fucker had his hands over his face. Laurent was staring at him expectantly, but it looked as though he wasn't going to elaborate.

"I have never. . . there's no fucking way. I don't even know who the hell his wife is."

"So how can you say you didn't sleep with her then?"

"Because that's the one place I didn't go," I snapped. "Anyone with a ring was off limits."

"You actually had limits?" He asked mockingly. I scowled at him. "Maybe she didn't wear one, brainiac. Ever think of that?" he continued, lifting one eyebrow up at me.

I scanned my memory as far back as I could remember. Every girl I had ever screwed, even the ones I only messed around with. I tried to see every single face. Having a photographic memory was a huge fucking blessing when it actually worked. Some faces were fuzzier than others depending on how much I'd had to drink and names weren't always clear; but I knew for a fact that not a single one of them wore a ring, and I definitely never went into a conquest without knowing the game. I didn't pick up randoms. The community I travelled in wasn't that big. Everyone knew everyone else's business; who was single, who was attached, who was on the re-bound. There's no way I would have been fooled by a chick simply removing her ring.

I shook my head. "There's no way." I said confidently.

"Look, man, you've admitted that back then you didn't really care if they had boyfriends. I'm just sayin."

"Fuck you!" I barked, completely annoyed. "You make it sound like it was all me. I didn't pursue attached women. I didn't pursue any women; they came to me."

Even as the words came out of my mouth I realized just how lame they were.

Emmett snorted. "So, if you and Bella got into a fight and she decided to go out to a bar?"

"Don't fucking go there, Em," I growled.

"Maybe she has a few drinks and unintentionally flirts. Maybe some guy gives her a little extra attention thinking he can get a little pussy; tells her how gorgeous and sexy she is. Listens to her every word, making her feel so fucking special." His eyes were boring into mine intensely. I narrowed mine. He needed to stop before I ripped his fucking head off.

"Let's say she has a moment of weakness; the fight, the alcohol, the affection setting up the mood just right."

I could feel my nostrils flaring in anger as I breathed heavily. The simple image of Bella with anyone else pissed me off. The thought of some guy telling her what she needed to hear just to get in her pants, and low and behold, I was pissed off at the hypothetical man who would try to steal her from me."

"Fuck!" I groaned.

"That's what I thought," Emmett said smugly.

I punched him in the shoulder as hard as I could.

"Ouch. Fucker, what the hell was that for."

"For putting that fucking image in my head, asshole."

Emmett chuckled a little. "Serves you right."

"I didn't. . . I didn't think about that shit back then," I said seriously. "I didn't know what it was like. Bella's not just my girlfriend, Em, she's my life."

"I know that, Ed," he said patting me on the back. "I'm not justifying what he did. I'm just sayin you were an complete dick. You went to places you shouldn't have gone. Karma is a motherfucking bitch."

"I know, okay," I sighed. "But this is fucked up. Why wait all this time to get back at me? Why not just fuck me up and move on? Why take it out on Bella? She didn't do anyfuckingthing to him."

I looked back to the interrogation room as James lifted his head. His hands were shaking. He was obviously agitated and he couldn't stop fidgeting. He was definitely high on something. Or coming down from it.

"Is he high?" I asked incredulously. I could feel every nerve ending in my body beginning to tingle in fury. My fingers twitched and balled into fists.

I looked at the other detective. He shrugged. "I don't know. I'm only here to observe."

"He...he was driving one hundred and ten miles per hour with Bella in his car and he was fucking high?" My voice was louder than I expected, but I was I pissed. He could have killed her.

"Dude, you're gonna get us kicked out," Emmett warned. "If you want to hear what he has to say, you have to shut the fuck up."

As much as I wanted to argue, my brother was right. I was in this room simply because I had sworn to behave myself. One foot out of line and I would be tossed out on my ass.

"Can I get some water?" James asked.

Detective Laurent stood up and walked to the door. He opened it, poking his head through and looked at the other detective, who silently turned and walked out of the observation room.

"You listening closely?" Laurent asked me seriously.

"Yes, sir," I nodded.

"Do you know what he's talking about?"

I shook my head.

"Huh," he grunted. I was pretty sure he didn't believe me.

The other detective returned with a bottle of water and Laurent went back into the room, handing the bottle to James.

"Why don't you start at the beginning, Mr. Hunter," Laurent said, sitting back down.

"With what?" James sneered.

"How about we start with your wife? Tell me about her."

He shook his head. "I don't. . . What about her?"

"You tell me."

"I'm not playing fucking games with you," he snarled.

"I'm not playing games, Mr. Hunter. You just dropped one hell of a bomb in my lap. Where else would we start?"

"You want to know where to start? Fine. We'll start where she fucking cheated on me. Is that what you want to hear? She was the love of my life and she fucking betrayed me. For him! For all of his fucked up promises that he never had any intention of keeping."

_Promises? What fucking promises? I never made promises._

Laurent tilted his head. "So what happened?"

He groaned loudly and tugged at his hair. "I don't. . . I don't know. She left. I mean, fuck, I probably wouldn't have kept her anyway; not after he'd spoiled her, but she never gave me the chance to decide. It should have been my fucking decision to walk away, not hers."

"And you believe that she left you because of Mr. Cullen?"

"What the fuck are you trying to say? Of course she did." James' face was twisted up in anger. I could practically see his knuckles turning white from how hard he was clenching his fists.

"What makes you think that, Mr. Hunter?"

"She told me!" he snapped. "She said they'd been fucking for months!"

_What the hell?_

Emmett snorted. "Okay, now I know he's lying," he said shaking his head in disbelief.

My brother had a point. A good one. Whether James was lying his way through the interrogation or if his wife had actually told him that, there was no way I had actually had some sort of long-term fling with her. There were several girls I had been with more than once, but not for months at a time. Especially since this had all happened before I broke up with Tanya. As much as I fooled around on her, there was never an opportunity for me to have a regular girl, not that I would have even considered it anyway.

"She said that he'd shown her what she was missing out on by being married to me and she just didn't love me anymore," James continued.

"Mr. Hunter, help me out here, cause clearly I'm a little confused. How does your wife's decision to have an affair with Mr. Cullen factor into all of this? It sounds to me as though you're holding him responsible for the entire thing. Doesn't she bear any of the responsibility?"

"She never would have gone anywhere if he had just left her alone. There's no way she pursued him. He just has to have every fucking thing he wants whether it belongs to someone else or not. Everyone knew who he was and what he did. It was fucking disgusting."

"So you believed that your wife had an affair with Mr. Cullen and that's why she left you. Is that when you decided to get revenge?"

James scoffed. "I tried. I figured if he could take something of mine, I could take something of his."

"You tried?"

"If I had known that he didn't actually give a shit about her I wouldn't have bothered. She's been one big pain in my ass for almost three fucking years."

Laurent looked really confused.

"Who are we talking about?"

"Tanya," James said, disdain obvious in his voice.

"Tanya Denali?"

"Yeah," he grunted, rolling his eyes.

"When did you become associated with Ms. Denali?"

I listened as James described how he had come to confront me about screwing his wife, but discovered Tanya leaving my apartment in obvious disarray. Instead of the beat down he wanted to give me, he decided to take Tanya instead. I listened as he explained how he'd tried to get me to catch them. He sent sexual text messages and marked her. Fuck, I'd never even noticed that she was marked. Maybe that wasn't so surprising; my eyes were usually closed.

I kind of felt sick to my stomach that I had actually kept sleeping with Tanya knowing that she was with someone else. I kept my shit wrapped up, but it was still a disturbing thought. Especially now that I was with Bella. I knew I was being a hypocrite, but I was a different person. I was just extremely lucky I didn't end up with an STD.

He talked about his arrest in Boston and how he got served divorce papers while he was in prison, which he signed because he couldn't stand the thought that his wife, who had only ever been with him, had become such a whore. He said that when he was released, he discovered that his landlord had put all his shit on the street and whatever wasn't stolen was thrown in the dumpster. His parents disowned him and cut him off; refusing to even let him explain why his life was turning to shit.

Finally he gave up and called the only person who had visited him in prison. Tanya. He moved to Tacoma because she offered him a place to stay free of charge, pussy whenever he wanted it, and other benefits that he refused to divulge. It was fairly obvious that the guy was hooked on something though.

The entire time he was talking, he was becoming more agitated.

Laurent seemed to notice too. His eyes were narrowed, examining James' behavior.

"He wasn't even on my radar anymore," James growled. "Not really. I mean, I occasionally thought about him; every time I thought about how fucked up my life had become because of him. It wasn't until that little slut Jessica came over screaming about the fact that he was back in Washington that I really put much thought into him."

"Jessica?"

James shook his head. "I don't know what the fuck her last name is. She was a friend of T's in high school. She was yapping about some whore that Edward tapped and knocked up." James started laughing. "Imagine that, T and Jessica calling someone else a whore. Do you know how long it took me to get in between that girl's legs? Less than ten minutes." He licked his lips and looked as if he was remembering something enjoyable.

"Ewph," I grimaced, not wanting to even think of what was going through his sick and twisted mind.

I watched as Laurent took a deep breath. He was getting impatient.

"So you became aware of Isabella Swan at that point?"

"Yeah, I guess. T was constantly ranting. At first it wasn't anything, but then she came home one day and exploded; begging me to take her out; the kid too."

My body went rigid. Was he really saying what I thought he was saying?

"She wanted you to kill them? Isabella and her son?"

"She just said take them out. She didn't care how; she wanted them out of the way."

"That was your plan? And you were okay with 'taking out' a mother and child who were completely innocent?"

"Uh, . . ." he hesitated. He seemed to be thinking about his answer.

"What were you going to do with them?"

He shifted uncomfortably and put his hand to his mouth, chewing on his thumbnail.

"You only ended up taking Isabella. What changed?" Laurent was just trying to get him talking again. It worked.

"Tanya changed her mind. Don't know why. Told me leave the kid alone. I left him alone. Told me to get the car seat. I got the car seat."

"The car seat? Where'd you get the car seat?"

"Douchebag's car," he snorted. And then it was as if he realized what the fuck he'd just admitted to. "Shit," he swore.

"From Edward Cullen's car?"

James didn't answer.

"And what about the break-in to the Swan/Cullen apartment, Mr. Hunter? We already know you were there. Why don't you tell us about that."

James tensed up and seemed hesitant to answer. He was looking everywhere, but at Detective Laurent.

"Mr. Hunter? The break-in?"

"Tanya got all pissy when she found out they moved in together," he said after a couple of minutes. "She dragged me with her, said she wanted to scare Bella. I didn't know she was gonna fuck up her shit that bad. I figured we'd steal a few things, break shit. But she wouldn't let me take the fucking television or anything. She was worried that they could trace it back to us. We waited until the house was empty, fucked up their bedroom and took some shit from the kid's room. Then we left."

"It was just yourself and Tanya?"

"Yeah," he answered agitatedly.

"And you didn't have sex while you were there?"

James scoffed. "No. I'm telling you, that fucking cow was trying to set me up." He took a long slug of his water. "I'm done." he said, slamming his water onto the table after taking a drink. "I'm not saying one more word until I get a lawyer.

Detective Laurent stood up. "We're done for now anyway, Mr. Hunter."

"Do I get go home now?" James shouted as Laurent opened the door.

He turned back around and shook his head. "Mr. Hunter, you're not going home for a long time." And then he stepped out of the interrogation room.

"Come with me," he said without actually looking at me. Emmett and I followed him into the other room. "Sit down."

Ten minutes later Detective Laurent was standing in front of me again.

"You still have no idea what he's talking about?" he eyed me.

"He's fucking lying," I said angrily. "I have no idea who his wife is."

"Her name is Irina Hunter," he set a picture down in front of me. It was a picture of James, a few years younger. He was wearing a tuxedo and standing next to a tiny blond girl in a strapless white dress and veil. I did in fact know exactly who she was. I knew her face very well.

"Irina?" I asked shocked. "Irina's his wife?"

"You know her?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "She was in one of my classes."

He sighed heavily.

"I never slept with her," I assured.

He furrowed his brow. "Then why. . . ?"

"I don't know," I interrupted. "I knew she was married. She was nice and funny, but. . . I didn't touch her; not sexually. We had lunch together a few times, but I didn't even hit on her. "

"Are you sure?"

I glared at him. "I'm positive! Look, from what I remember she got married really young, seventeen or something." I scratched the back of my neck trying to remember some of the conversations we'd had. I had spent all of sophomore year sitting next to her in class. At first she was so shy and quiet, but eventually she got comfortable with me enough to chat.

"She'd been with the guy a long time, but she didn't really talk about him. She talked about wanting to travel. She was pre-med, like me, and wasn't sure if she wanted to go into medical school right away or do something else."

"Are you absolutely sure that you had no sexual relationship with this woman?"

"Yes, I'm sure," I insisted, getting increasingly agitated by the fact that he kept questioning me.

"Why would she have told her husband that you did?"

"I have no fucking clue!" I snapped. "Can't you ask her?"

"We have to find her first," he mumbled.

"Why does it even matter?" I bit. "It shouldn't matter why. All that fucking matters is that he did what he did. Put the fucker away."

"Because we need motive, Edward. If his attorney suspects that there is any sort of a loop hole in all of this, he's going to run with it. He'll get less time."

"Over my dead fucking body, he will. He went after my fucking family because of something I didn't even do? And even if I had, there's no justification for this," I bellowed.

"He's going to jail, Edward. Let it go."

I gaped at him.

_Let it go? Did he just ask me to let it go?_

"Bella is lying in a hospital bed right now all messed up and completely unconscious because he decided that I fucked his wife and deserved to pay for it? How. . . explain to me how I'm supposed to just let this go?"

I was yelling at the top of my lungs. The entire station was looking at me.

That moment, the one I knew was coming, was finally here. I was losing my shit. I had never, in my life, been as grotesquely pissed off as I was right then. The pain, the fear and anguish at the thought of losing my family, my life, was at its boiling point. I picked up a phone off a desk and hurled it across the room. It smacked against the wall and shattered into pieces.

"I'm gonna kill that motherfucker!" I snarled as I tried to take off towards the interrogation room.

Maybe I shouldn't have warned them. I barely had time to blink before I found myself on the ground, three guys, including my brother, holding me down. There were hands on my legs, a knee digging into my back, my arms were wrenched backwards and my face pressed against the cold tile.

"Edward?" I heard Detective Laurent growl. "You either need to settle down right now or I'm going to lock your ass up."

I tried to struggle, but it was completely useless; and it hurt. Everything hurt.

Maybe it would have been better if they had just locked me up. I took a few deep breaths, but since I had so much weight on me it was pretty painful.

"Let me up," I said, much calmer.

"You gonna stay put?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah," I grunted.

Instantly there was relief as I was let go. Not entirely let go though. Emmett kept a grip on my arm and helped me up off the ground.

"Look, it's late," Detective Laurent said firmly. "You need to go. Go see your fiancée, go see your son. Go somewhere else. There's no reason for you to sit here. We're done for the night."

"What about Tanya?"

"She's lawyered up," he sighed.

"Is she going to get out?"

"Because of Charlie's testimony, we have enough to book her on suspicion of kidnapping. They don't take those types of charges lightly so she'll have to stay locked up until Monday."

"And on Monday?" I asked, my eyes wide.

"We're executing the search warrants on her homes and her vehicle. Hopefully on Monday we'll have something to back up James' claims."

My mind tried to wrap around what he was telling me. "Are you saying that there's a chance she might get off?"

"I'm not saying anything right now because I don't know. I am not an attorney, I'm a detective. We are gathering as much evidence as we can. The DA will look at the case first thing on Monday morning and decide if there's a case against her."

I clenched my fists together and felt my brother's grip tighten.

"That woman has been planning for months to take my family away from me. You heard what James said, she was willing to take not only Bella out, but my child. MY THREE YEAR OLD SON! The only reason that he's not dead right now is because she had some fucked up fantasy that if she brought him back to me that I'd love her. I'm telling you right now, that if you let her go. . ."

"Edward!" Emmett said, jumping in front of me and putting his hand roughly over my mouth. "Do not say it," he growled under his breath. He leaned in so that he could whisper in my ear. "You are standing in a police station and you have already said waaaay too much. Don't be stupid!"

I pushed him away lightly and ran my hand through my hair.

Detective Laurent was frowning at me. "We will do everything we can to get the evidence we need to put her away, but she was smart, Edward. We cannot connect her to the destruction of your car or the break-in at your apartment yet."

He approached me and put his hand on my shoulder. "I understand your frustration and your anger. But James is going to go away for a long time. We have him on kidnapping, aggravated assault, and multiple drug charges as well as vandalism and burglary."

"And what will that get reduced to?" I asked petulantly.

"Like I said, I'm not an attorney," he sighed. "You need to go to your family. Give them hugs and kisses and be thankful they are alive and safe. Let us do our jobs."

I thought about what he was saying to me. He was right. I had spent so much time trying to get "answers" that I had completely neglected what really mattered; Charlie and Bella.

I turned to face Emmett. "I'm going to stop by the hospital to check on Bella for a few hours and then I'm going to go home. I'll take you back to your car.

He nodded. "Yeah, I should get back to Rose and make sure she's okay."

I looked at Laurent. "You won't release them without calling me?"

"Neither one of them is getting out before Monday. I'll call," he assured.

Emmett and I got into my car and I drove us back towards the hospital.

He kept looking over at me every twenty seconds.

"What?" I finally snapped.

"Was it worth it?"

"Was what worth it?" I was in no mood for his shit.

"Dipping your wick in every available pussy you came across?"

"I didn't sleep with his wife," I protested.

"No, but you can see how he would think you did."

"I wasn't that bad."

"No?"

"No."

"Uh, if we're going by the way you were in high school...I got news for you, man; you really were _that_ bad."

I sighed and pursed my mouth together in a thin line. Did I really want to get into this with him?

"Look, Em, I'm not gonna attempt to justify myself to you or anybody else for that matter. Especially regarding things I can't change. The only person that I have to be accountable to is Bella. I'll tell you this though, there will only ever be one that matters and she will be the only one for the rest of my life.

"So, just how many were there?" he asked, clearing his throat.

"Enough," I grumbled. "And no, it wasn't worth it."

"Does Bella know how many you've been with?"

"No. She knows about the ones in high school, but that's it. And unless she asks me flat out, she won't. It's not something I'm proud of. All it does is remind me of how much we gave up because we were both too chickenshit to talk to each other after that party."

"How bout after you knocked her up? How many were there?" he pushed.

"You really are a nosy bastard," I laughed. "I'm not telling you. Drop it."

"Fine," he huffed. "But you really regret every single one of them?"

I nodded. "I would have easily given up every last one of them if I had known."

"I don't even know what to say to that."

"You don't have to say anything. It's my dick that got me into trouble."

"This wasn't your fault, E," he sighed as I pulled up to the hospital.

"It is. . . and it's not. It wasn't me, but. . . it was my reputation."

"Fuck that, little brother. Just because you were a slut doesn't mean you deserved this. And Bella and Little C certainly didn't. It fucking blows that they were targeted in all of this."

I scoffed. "Thanks a lot."

"You know what I mean."

I nodded. "Yeah, I get it. Thanks, Em."

I bumped fists with my brother before we got out of the car.

"Tell Bella that we love her when she wakes up."

"I will."

I made my way into the hospital and up to the ICU, but stopped dead in my tracks when I got to the waiting room.

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

I couldn't help myself. I knew I was being a dick, but it had been a long fucking day and this was the last thing I wanted to deal with at that moment.

"I'm not trying to start trouble, Edward," Riley said, holding his hands up palms out.

"Then you shouldn't have come."

He blew out a puff of air in frustration. "I got a phone call today from my mother telling me to turn on my television to the news."

I knew exactly where he was going.

"I didn't deserve to find out like that," he said quietly. "I know you don't like me. I wouldn't expect any less after what I said and how I reacted to everything. I know that neither of you wants me around, but I needed to know that everything was okay."

"Everything's fine," I assured.

"Charlie?"

"He's okay. He's at home with my parents."

"What happened?"

"You couldn't have called?"

"I did call."

I looked at him confused.

"I called Jake; several times. I told him I was coming over, but he said that Chief Swan didn't want me to."

_Ah, the call that the chief had taken at the station._

I wondered if the chief knew he was here. He said he'd handle him. I couldn't imagine he did know if Riley was still here.

"So you showed up anyway?"

"Put yourself in my shoes, Edward. I just needed to make sure."

I was too exhausted to fight with him. It was nearly midnight and all I wanted to do was get in to see my girl.

"Fine, Riley. Now you know."

He sighed heavily. "What happened? Did they catch who did this to her?"

I nodded. "Yeah. He's going to jail."

"Why did he do it?"

"I can't do this right now, man. I need to be in there with her. She's okay. Charlie is okay. The people responsible are in jail."

"Christ, Edward. Give me a fucking break here."

I heard a throat clearing and saw two nurses giving us dirty looks from the nurses' station.

"Riley?"

We both turned towards the soft voice. A girl stood nervously off to the side, obviously worried about the rise in our voices. She was cute, maybe about five seven, exceptionally curvy, with long stick straight blond hair and freckles across her nose and cheeks.

"Hey," his voice said as he reached out for her. I watched as she stepped forward, allowing his hand to rest on her hip.

"Lizzy, this is Edward. He's Bella's boyfriend. Charlie's father."

"Oh. Oooh!" she gasped. "Uh, hi." She reached out and I shook her hand kind of limply.

"This is Lizzie," Riley said quietly.

The way he was holding her told me that they were much more than just friends. Riley had moved on.

"Hi," I said, smiling politely at her.

"Is Bella okay?" she asked timidly.

"Do you know her?"

She grinned. "Yeah. I'm Ginger's best friend."

"Ginger?"

Riley cleared his throat. "My little sister. She's a sophomore at UW."

"Oh."

What else was I supposed to say?

"Riley, we need to go," Lizzie said, looking up at him. I tilted my head and watched as she leaned in. This girl absolutely adored him.

And he brought her down here to see Bella? My irritation spiked suddenly, until I saw him look down at her. Whatever it was that he felt for her was genuine. He actually cared about her.

He turned back to me.

"I'll have someone call you when we have some news. Obviously Jake has your number?" I said, looking away towards Bella's room.

"Yeah. Unless he's deleted it," he said, humor evident in his voice.

Riley and Lizzie left the hospital without any additional words. I entered Bella's room quietly.

She was still unconscious; Chief Swan was sitting in a chair in the corner watching Sportscenter on mute.

"Has she woken up at all?"

"He glanced over at me and then down at Bella."

"Not yet. What did you find out?"

I didn't say anything at first, causing him to look back up at me.

"Edward?"

"James Hunter was under the impression I slept with his wife. He was looking for revenge. "

The chief froze, his eyes narrowing. "Did you?"

Of course. I was expecting his question.

"No. I knew her, but I never. . . "

He sighed heavily. "Maybe we should have this discussion some other time when I haven't been awake for over twenty-four hours."

"Maybe," I agreed. "I need to go home and see Charlie. Bella will be pissed when she finds out that I haven't been with him the whole time."

Chief Swan nodded. "Yup."

"But I want to stay with her for a bit."

He waved his hand towards a chair in the corner of the room and I pulled it up next to Bella's bed. I reached for her hand, which was slightly cold, and rubbed my thumb over her skin.

We sat in silence for a couple of hours until I started to drift off, my head resting on the bed with my hand still intertwined with hers.

"Edward?"

"Huh," I grunted.

"It's after two," Chief Swan said quietly. "Do you want to stay here or do you want to head home for when Charlie wakes up?"

I lifted my head and rubbed my eyes.

"I should probably go. You'll call me if she wakes up?"

He nodded, his head slightly wobbling. He had to be exhausted.

"Are you going to go home at any point?" I asked.

"Yeah, I'll go when you get back."

The hospital was eerily quiet. There were a few nurses at the station chatting, eating, dozing, reading. They smiled at me as I passed. My returning smile was weak. I must have looked really pathetic.

The drive home was one of those that I couldn't really remember. My mind was all over the place trying to figure out what would happen to James and Tanya. James was guaranteed prison time, but was Tanya? She had to be. There had to be some evidence against her.

When I got back to the house, I noticed that there was a light on in the apartment so I moved in that direction. I unlocked the door and went in. I could see that my mom was obviously there. Her purse was sitting on the entryway table and her shoes and coat were there as well.

I stood in place, staring at Charlie's little sneakers, which were placed neatly next to my mother's. When I was finally able to move, I made my way to his bedroom, stopping only to check the guest room. I tapped on the door lightly and then opened it. Mom looked like she was sleeping peacefully, but she turned her head.

"Is Bella okay?" she whispered.

"She's still unconscious. Emmett called?" I asked realizing that I hadn't been the one to tell them that Bella had been found.

"Yes, he did," she said softly.

"Sorry, Ma."

"It's okay, sweetheart, I understand. We can talk in the morning."

"Okay. I came home to see Charlie, but I'm going back."

"He was quiet all night. I didn't know what to tell him. He was asleep before we'd heard anything."

"I'll tell him when he wakes up."

"Goodnight, honey."

"Goodnight, Mom, I love you."

"I love you too."

I didn't want to go into my bedroom. I didn't want to look at our empty bed and know that Bella was not there because she was in the hospital, in pain. I felt a wave of guilt pass over me and had to force myself to push it back.

Instead, I went to the hall bathroom, used my finger and some of Charlie's toothpaste and went straight into his room. I would clean myself up before heading back to the hospital.

He was lying in his bed, breathing heavily. I ran my hand over his cheek and through his hair.

"I don't know what I would have done without you, buddy," I whispered sadly. "Now all we have to do is get your mommy home."

Kissing him softly, I sat down in the rocking chair and leaned my head back, closing my eyes. I really wanted a fucking drink, but I knew that I couldn't. Not now. When Bella got home, maybe, but not now.

XXXXXXX

I woke feeling a slight tickle across my face. I knew that I had drifted off at some point, but it really only felt like I'd been asleep for a few minutes. As I became aware, I realized what the tickle was. Tiny little fingers were dancing across my face. I smiled widely before I opened my eyes.

"Good morning, Charlie," I said, looking at my son who was standing off to the side of me looking sheepish.

"Hi, Daddy. Why you sweeping in my chair?"

I chuckled. "Good question."

I lifted my body, feeling the ache of a very uncomfortable sleeping position. "Ohhh," I groaned.

Charlie's eyes widened. I tweaked his nose and pulled him up onto my lap, hugging him tightly.

I heard him squeak and loosened my grip. I expected him to wiggle out of my grasp, but he didn't. He settled down firmly against me and fiddled with the collar of my shirt.

"Daddy?" he finally said. There was a cautiousness to his voice that I didn't understand.

"What, Charlie?"

"Is Mommy wost wike Nemo's mommy?" I watched as his lower lip began to tremble.

_Oh shit. Charlie didn't know we had found Bella._

Before I could answer, he exploded into tears. My eyes widened. I was completely taken aback.

"Charlie. Charlie, buddy, what's the matter?"

He just sobbed and sobbed. And I was completely helpless. Again. I started to rock him back and forth.

"What happened?" Mom asked as she came into the room.

"I don't know," I shrugged. "He asked if Bella was lost like Nemo's mommy and. . ." I waved my hand over my hysterical child.

"Oh. Oh, Edward. Oh, oh."

"What?"

"He wanted to watch Finding Nemo last night, so we let him. Nemo's mommy is. . . K. I. L. L. E. D. in the beginning of the movie."

_Oh, Goddamn._

I hugged Charlie to me tightly, wrapping one arm around his back and the other snaking up into his hair. "No, Charlie," I soothed. "Mommy's not lost. Oh, buddy, Mommy's just fine."

He looked up at me, eyes all red and wet, tears and snot covering his face. I didn't care. I put my hands on either side of his face, wiping his nose with my thumb. "Mommy's not lost anymore, Charlie. She's just fine."

"Where is she?"

"She doesn't feel good so she's at the hospital, but she's okay. I promise."

"Can I see her?"

I looked at my mom, who looked like someone had just ripped out her heart.

"Maybe, buddy. I'll ask the doctor, okay?"

"Kay," he sniffed.

I hugged him to me again and just held him. I didn't want to let him go, but I needed to get back to the hospital.

"I'm gonna go see Mommy right now, okay, bud?"

"An ask da doctor?"

"Yes, and I'll ask the doctor," I assured.

After a few more minutes I stood up, setting Charlie on the ground and leading him into the kitchen. My mom offered to get him his breakfast while I cleaned myself up.

A shower had never felt so fucking good. I felt gross. I had to keep my eyes closed for most of it because our bathroom was full of Bella's face scrub and body wash. There was a big purple poofy thing hanging from a suction cup. Even her fucking hair, which was draped in strands across the shower wall from where she. . . and occasionally I, had pulled it out while running our hands through it.

I cleaned myself quickly and dressed. I had pulled my clothes from the dresser before heading into the shower so that I didn't have to spend any extra time in the bedroom.

"Here," my mom smiled as she handed me a travel mug full of hot coffee. "I put two extra shots in it."

I chuckled. "Thanks, Ma."

I kissed Charlie's head. "I'm gonna go see Mommy. You be good for Gramma, okay,"

"Kay, Daddy. You ask da doctor?" He asked one last time.

"I'll ask the doctor." I winked at him before grabbing my shit and heading out the door.

When I got to the hospital a little after ten, I parked the car and took the stairs two at a time instead of waiting for the elevator.

I sprinted down the hallway, much to the chagrin of the nurses, and pushed open the door to her room. Jake was sitting in the chair next to her bed.

"Hey, man," he said with a slight smile.

"Hey, Jake." I nodded. "She hasn't woken up?"

"No. She's made a few noises, but she hasn't opened her eyes yet."

Although I wanted Bella to wake up, I was really happy that she hadn't done it while I was gone.

"You looked really tired, Edward," he commented, standing up. "Have you slept at all?"

I shook my head. "Not really. I don't know where to be," I sighed. "I want to be here, with Bella, but. . . but Charlie's at home and I can't just leave him. He's been through a lot too."

"Have you thought about bringing him to see her?"

I looked down at my girl. She was still pale and had deep bluish purple rings beneath her eyes. There was a scratch across her cheek, but there wasn't any more blood.

"I don't think he should see her like this," I said quietly.

"Well, that's up to you. Maybe when she wakes up?"

I shrugged and changed the subject.

"Where's the chief?"

"When I got here, he looked like shit. Almost as bad as you," he smirked. "I told him to go home, take a shower, get a little sleep. I said I'd stay until you got here."

"Cool. Claire?"

"She came in with me at about seven, but went back home. They aren't particularly thrilled with all the people coming and going."

"Whatever," I mumbled. "They can deal. You gonna stick around?" I asked as I went to stand over the bed. I brushed the back of my fingers over Bella's cheek and gently cupped her jaw.

"Nah, I'll let you spend some time alone with her. She's gonna wake up soon. I think she's been trying for a while, but. . ." he shrugged. "Maybe she was waiting for you."

I looked up at him and he was smirking at me.

"Thanks, man."

"No problem. Give me a call later?"

"Will do. Hey," I stopped him as he was walking out the door. "Riley? Dude showed up here last night."

"Oh, shit!" he groaned. "Sorry, man. I meant to tell you." He grimaced.

"It's fine, Jake. I appreciate you dealing with him. Next time just give me a heads up."

He nodded and left.

I sat down in the chair and waited. Have I mentioned how much I hated fucking waiting?

XXXXXXXXX

BPOV

I became aware of the beeping before anything else. Annoying, constant beeping. Everything was dark.

_God, my head hurts. And my shoulder. Shit, my shoulder hurts._

I didn't want to know where I was, where he'd taken me this time. My mind was fuzzy and I couldn't focus on anything. It didn't feel like I was still in the car. I wasn't comfortable by any means, but I wasn't exactly uncomfortable either.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep_

I licked my lips and tried to open my eyes. They felt heavy and crusty and the light coming into whatever room I was in made my head hurt even more.

I moaned painfully and let them fall shut again. There was no point. Whatever he had given me was still in my system. It must have been, because I heard a voice that couldn't possibly be there.

"Bella?"

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Edward," I sighed. My mouth was so dry, my throat scratchy, but just saying his name made me feel better. I didn't care if James heard me or if it pissed him off.

"Yeah, baby, I'm right here. Can you open your eyes?"

I let my head rock back and forth. I didn't want Edward to go away.

"Please, love, open your eyes."

"No," I whimpered.

I felt a warm hand encapsulate mine and squeeze. It felt so real, so right.

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Please?"

I couldn't even resist dream Edward. I blinked my eyes open and then squinted.

"It hurts," I whined.

"I know it does, baby. Open your eyes and look at me and I'll get the nurse."

_The nurse? What nurse?_

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

"Come back to me, Bella."

There was a ringing in my ears as I opened my eyes fully and they began to focus on the face in front of me. I really wasn't prepared for what I was looking at.

"There you are," he smiled.

Without taking my eyes away from his beautiful face, I scanned my surroundings. I was obviously in the hospital; the beeping sound was coming from a machine beside me. Everything was cold and sterile.

But I was alive. I was here, with Edward, not with James.

And then one very clear thought pierced through the haze.

_Charlie._

Suddenly I couldn't breathe. I heard the beeps getting louder and faster. I was gasping.

If I was here, where was my baby?

Edward was speaking again. I tried to hear him, but the panic was overwhelming everything else.

He gripped my face in his strong, sure hands and stared into my eyes.

"Bella, baby, you gotta calm down," he said slowly.

I shook my head. How was I supposed to calm down?

"Yes, baby, please, they'll come in here and sedate you." This time he was begging.

I tried to speak, I tried to ask, but the words weren't coming out. But he understood anyway.

"Bella, Charlie's fine. He's with my mom."

"You found him?" I sobbed.

He was going to hate me for losing him. I was a terrible mother. How could I lose my child? I never should have taken my eyes off of him.

"He's fine," Edward soothed. "Please, baby, just calm down."

It was all too much. I had no idea how I got to where I was. The last thing I knew, James was holding that horrible rag over my mouth, telling me it was time to sleep. He didn't trust me not to make any noise. Probably smart of him.

~o~

_I had been talking to Edward on the phone. We were trying to find Charlie. That must have been when he took me._

_When I came to, I was face down in a musty old couch. My eyes were heavy and everything was blurry. I blinked a few times and groaned. My shoulder was throbbing and my hands were tied behind my back with something that was digging into my skin. It appeared that I was in some sort of a room, or a shed. It was hard to tell, because it was pretty dark. The room was smoky and it smelled like pot._

_I coughed a few times and waited for my eyes to begin focusing. When they did I wanted to close them again._

_James Hunter was sitting across from me. Staring._

_I gasped and then coughed again as the residual smoke filled my lungs._

_I watched as a smile crossed his face. He stood up and walked towards me. He had a glass pipe in his hand. When he bent down in front of me I tried to recoil. I watched as his hand came up and he lit the bowl, taking in a deep breath and holding. He lowered the pipe and tilted his head before blowing the smoke directly into my face._

_I was taken off guard and inhaled deeply, before coughing again._

_"You like that?" he grinned._

_I didn't answer him. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction._

_"I suppose you'd have to be high, spending your time with the likes of Edward Cullen, wouldn't you?"_

_I closed my eyes. I didn't want to look at him anymore._

_"Open your eyes and look at me, Bella," he said softly._

_I refused._

_"I would recommend that you start listening, little girl. Your fate's in my hands and I'm sick of bitches not listening." His voice was low and menacing._

_I reluctantly opened my eyes again._

_"Do you love him?"_

_"Absolutely," I said, gritting my teeth together._

_"Why?"_

_"What do you mean why?"_

_"How could you love such a self-centered, arrogant, fuck-wad like him? That's what I mean."_

_"I. . . that's a stupid question."_

_"Humor me," he said flatly._

_"I've always loved him; since we were kids."_

_"You loved him so much you didn't tell him you were pregnant with his baby?"_

_"I didn't know that he loved me back," I whispered._

_"Cause he wasn't with you." It wasn't a question._

_"No," I answered._

_"He was enjoying the fruits of Tanya's pussy," he said, rolling his eyes. "But he loved you?"_

_I nodded._

_"He loved you so much he was not only dating someone else, but he was banging every piece of tail within a fifty mile radius."_

_"How is this any of your fucking business?" I spit._

_He ignored my question._

_"You don't actually think he's staying faithful to you, do you? Shit, I've been following him for months. Do you know how many women I've seen him with?"_

_I didn't believe him. I wouldn't._

_"You don't have to believe me; I really don't give a shit. But I hope you're protecting yourself. I don't think I've ever seen a fucker get around the way that one does. Must be nice for him, having complete strangers willing to spread their legs; never knowing that he has a girl and a kid at home. Or maybe they do know and just don't care." He shrugged._

_I closed my eyes._

_"I'm trying to do you a favor, Bella. He doesn't deserve you. You seem like a good girl. I would hate to see you commit to him only to find out that his dick's been visiting all sorts of pussy the entire time he's been sweeping you off your feet."_

_"Fuck you," I finally spit._

_"Now now, princess," he sneered. "If you want me to, you're going to have to ask nicer than that."_

_He reached over and brushed back a piece of hair that had fallen in my eyes. I winced. I didn't want his dirty hands anywhere near me._

_"You really are beautiful," he said quietly. "How does he do it?"_

_His blue eyes were looking at me with such intensity. It was almost as if he were actually looking through me._

_"That wasn't a rhetorical question, Bella. I really want to know. How does a guy with no soul make the most beautiful women fall in love with him? How does he steal them away?"_

_His question took me off guard. There was such resentment and pain in his question._

_"You were with someone else when he came back, weren't you? Someone who loved you? Someone who would have killed for you? For your son? How did Edward lure you in?"_

_"It wasn't like that," I said quietly._

_"It never is," he sneered, pulling his hand away from me._

_His mention of Charlie had me panicking. My heart thumping once again in my chest._

_"Where's my son?" I growled._

_He laughed. "I don't have him."_

_"What?"_

_If he didn't have Charlie, who did?_

_"That was the original plan, for me to take you both, but. . . plans change." Irritation flashed in his eyes, but then disappeared._

_"What are you going to do with me?" I asked._

_"I don't know yet."_

_"Are you going to rape me?" I blurted out. If I could have covered my mouth with my hand, I would have. I didn't want the fucker getting any ideas._

_James snorted. "No, Bella. Don't worry, I'm not going to force myself on you. I could, but where's the fun in that? If I take you, it will be because you're begging me to."_

_"Ha," I laughed humorlessly."That'll never fucking happen."_

_"We'll see about that," he hummed. "I'm a ghost; I've got all the time in the world. No one knows where I am, which means no one knows where you are. Tanya's given me enough money to last us for a while. You'll be amazed at what you're willing to do when you really have no other choice."_

_He lifted his pipe again and repeated his previous actions. My plan was to not breathe in, but he pinched my nose shut as he held the smoke in his lungs. He out held me. When my lungs burned from lack of oxygen, I had to take a breath and right as I did he blew out._

_"Why are you doing that?" I choked._

_"It'll relax you. Take the fight out. I don't want to hurt you Bella, but I will if I have to."_

_He helped me sit up. I could feel the high taking over. I tried to fight it, but it was very difficult. I let my head lull backwards onto the sofa._

_"That's right, baby. You feel it now, don't you?"_

_"What time is it?" I asked, my words slurring together._

_"It's just after six, why?"_

_I was trying to do the math in my head, but I couldn't remember what time I had lost Charlie._

_Charlie. My baby. God, please let him be okay._

_I shook my head._

_"Why does my shoulder hurt?" I asked tiredly._

_He shrugged. "I must of yanked you too hard. I don't know how to pop it back in."_

_I looked over and saw that my shoulder looked like it was about two inches further away than where it normally was._

_"Uhh," I groaned. "It hurts."_

_"Stop fucking complaining," he growled._

_That is how the next several hours went. Every so often one of us would ask a question, but we primarily spent the time in silence. Eventually my high wore off and I began to get anxious again._

_James looked at me and smirked, then he looked at his watch._

_He laid out two lines and then looked up at me, grinning. "You want one?"_

_I blinked slowly and rolled my eyes, looking away._

_"Suit yourself, but you're missing out on one hell of a party."_

_He inhaled one of the lines, threw his head back, and shook it back and forth. "Ahhh," he sighed, sniffing and wiping his nose._

_When he went back down for the second line, I realized that my foot was definitely within range to connect. Without really thinking of the consequences, I pulled back my knee and shot it forward as hard as I could, the heel of my shoe smashing into the side of his eyes._

_He fell backwards without taking the line._

_"Fuck!" He screamed as he touched his face. When he pulled his hand back down and there was blood on it, his eyes darted to mine and I knew I was in trouble. I had nowhere to go. He practically jumped up off the floor, lifted his arm and backhanded me. Hard. I felt the ring on his hand connect and tear into the skin of my cheek. The jarring motion of our scuffle caused a sharp pain to rip through my shoulder and I clenched my teeth together, forcing the tears to stay away._

_"That is a warning, Bella," he said angrily. "If you ever fucking try that again, make no mistake, I will not hold back. I'm not afraid to hit a woman and I'm certainly not opposed to hitting one of Edward's whores."_

_I glared at him._

_"Yeah, that's right, baby. Just because he shares your bed on the regular, doesn't make you any less of a whore to him. It just makes you stupider than the rest."_

_He grabbed me roughly by my uninjured arm and yanked me to him. He smelled horribly of pot and stale beer. I almost wretched at the foul odor._

_He licked his lips. He was too close. He was making me sick. Luckily he pulled back._

_"Now, I'm gonna finish what I started here and then we're gonna blow this popsicle stand. Washington's getting a little bit dreary and depressing."_

_Fuck. He was planning on taking me out of state._

_He shoved me across the room and I tripped. Without my hands, I couldn't brace myself and I fell on my already hurt shoulder._

_I cried out in pain and then bit my lip. I didn't want him to know how much it hurt. I heard him inhale and then he was standing over me._

_"Let's go," he said lifting me to my feet._

_He grabbed his things and dragged me towards the door._

_I needed to try one more time. It was stupid, but first of all, he was about to put me in a car and drive after doing two hits of coke, drinking several beers and smoking pot. Second of all, I had no idea if he was planning on letting me live to begin with. I mean, how could he? I knew who he was and what he looked like. If he ever let me go. . . he wasn't ever going to let me go._

_The second we were outside, I screamed as loud as I could. It was dark so I couldn't see if there were any other houses around us, but someone had to hear me, right? James tried to cover my mouth, but I bit him._

_"You stupid little bitch, you never learn, do you?" he barked. He pulled me back inside and threw me towards the couch. "Sit the fuck down."_

_"No," I yelled._

_"Alright, you know what? You're not leaving me any other choice."_

_I watched as he grabbed what looked like a pill packet and bottle of something from his backpack._

_He also pulled out a bottle of water and opened it, sitting it on the floor next to us._

_"Come here," he snapped, grabbing my wrist and pulling me down to the floor. I was lying on my back and he was straddling my waist._

_"Open your mouth."_

_"I thought you said. . ."_

_"I'm not. Now, Open. Your. Mouth."_

_I shook my head. I wasn't going to do anything the fucker asked me to._

_"You are fucking impossible."_

_He grabbed my cheeks and squeezed them tightly, forcing my mouth open. He shoved a pill into my mouth and then picked up the bottle of water and poured it in after._

_I was trying to spit it out, but he covered my mouth and plugged my nose. I had no other choice._

_"What the fuck was that?" I asked when he took his hand off my mouth._

_"I'm taking extra precautions. You woke up too early the last time and I don't trust you. You're too noisy." He smirked. "Gorgeous, feisty, loud. No wonder Cullen's kept you around. I bet your a killer fuck."_

_I spit at him, hitting him in the face. "Why are you doing this to me?" I asked._

_He wiped his face and glared at me. "Because your boyfriend took something that didn't belong to him."_

_"What are you talking about?"_

_He grabbed the brown bottle off the table and a rag from his back pocket. He poured the liquid into the rag and then put it over my mouth. I couldn't really struggle; I knew it was pointless, so I didn't._

_"It's time to sleep now, princess," he smirked._

_Once again I felt my body getting heavy._

_"And because you asked so nicely. . . your Edward . . . stole my wife."_

~o~

I lifted my eyes towards Edward, tears slipping down my cheeks as I remembered.

Edward caught them with his thumb.

"He's really okay?" I sniffed.

"He is, baby. He's fine."

"I never should have let go of his hand," I hiccoughed.

"I'm not sure it would have mattered," he said quietly.

I frowned, not understanding his comment.

"Where was he? What happened to him?"

Edward grimaced a little.

"What?" I asked, my panic rising.

"I was hoping to have a little more time."

"Time for what, Edward? What the hell happened to my baby?" I was on the verge of completely freaking out.

"Nothing, Bella. I told you, he's fine."

"Then why do you look like that?" I asked, starting to cry again.

He took a deep breath. "It was Tanya."

"What was Tanya?" I asked, not understanding what he was saying.

He swallowed and grabbed my hand. "Tanya took him."

It took my mind a few minutes to process what he meant.

_Tanya took him? Tanya took him. Tanya. . ._

"What?" I screeched, ignoring the pain in my head and body as I sat up quickly.

Edward leaned over me and put his hands on my shoulders. Then he looked up at the heart monitor, which was beeping wildly, showing my heart rate was now spiking at one hundred and seventy beats per minute.

"Jesus, baby," Edward gasped, holding onto me.

The curtain covering the door opened and a nurse came in. "What is going on in here?" she asked looking at Edward suspiciously. He was hovering over me and to someone who didn't know any better, it looked like we were getting a little bit affectionate.

"Oh, you're awake," she smiled. And then she frowned. "You know you can't do that in here," she scolded. "You, missy, are in absolutely no condition."

Edward opened his mouth to protest, but I stopped him. "Sorry," I breathed offering her a forced smile. "We're, uh, just happy to see each other."

"Mmmmhmmm," she said, pursing her lips.

Edward looked at me, confused. The truth was, I didn't want to the nurse to sedate me. If she thought I was getting upset, she would have. But if she thought we were just getting worked up, she wouldn't.

She checked my vitals and my fluid levels and left again with a stern warning to keep our distance.

"I'm going to call the doctor and let him know you're awake," she said as she slipped back out the curtain.

The second she was gone I turned towards Edward.

"What the hell do you mean Tanya took him?"

"Baby, this is a long fucking story," he groaned.

"I don't think I'm going anywhere anytime soon," I snarked.

So we sat there. And he told me about James and Tanya and how they were connected. I knew he was leaving out some things, but I didn't push him. As much as I wanted to know, I was too tired to fight with him.

"James is going to jail," he sighed. "But they don't know if they have enough evidence against Tanya yet."

If she didn't go to jail, I was going to kill her with my bare hands. Twice. They were going to have to pry her dead body from my grip as I rang her fucking neck.

I was lying back on my cold and hard hospital bed, with my eyes closed. One thing was missing from his recount. One thing that I thought I already knew, but wasn't quite sure.

"Why, Edward?" I asked flatly.

"Why?"

I nodded. "Why did they do this?"

"I don't know why Tanya did it. Because she's crazy?"

"And James?"

He hesitated. I watched his eyes darken in anger. "He thinks I slept with his wife."

"He thinks?"

"His wife was in one of my classes a few years ago. She told him that we'd had an affair. She left him."

I narrowed my eyes. The way he was saying it sounded like it hadn't happened.

"Did you?"

His head snapped up. "No, Bella, I didn't. I don't know why she told him that, but I didn't. I swear to fucking God that I never touched that woman."

I lowered my eyes and bit my lip.

"Baby?" his voice was trembling slightly.

"I. . .I don't know what to say."

James' cruel words echoed around in my head. Deep down I knew that what he said was complete bullshit, but at the same time, it was hard to just ignore them.

"Say you believe me," he begged.

"Edward, I'm tired."

"Bella, please."

He lifted my chin and gazed at me. His emerald eyes were red rimmed and so tired. I watched the light in them start to fade.

"What did he say to you, baby?" he whispered.

"He said a lot of things, Edward."

"And you believed him?"

I could practically hear his heart breaking.

I shook my head. "No," I admitted. "He's vile and disgusting. I know he was lying, but that didn't make his words any easier to hear." I swallowed painfully. "You have no reason to lie to me now. Not with everything we've been through."

He smiled sadly at me and then his lips were pressed against mine. They were gentle and cautious. He was afraid of hurting me.

I opened my mouth and let his tongue caress mine reverently. It felt so good.

"I thought I'd lost you," he whispered, pressing his forehead against mine. A tear slipped from the corner of his eye.

"Never, baby," I smiled, rubbing my fingertips over the scruff on his jaw.

He kissed my mouth one more time and then he proceeded to kiss every square inch of my body that was exposed, including my toes that were peaking out at the bottom of the bed.

When he was done, he buried his face into my belly. I ran my fingers through his hair until I was too tired to move.

I knew that there was still a lot more to go through, but at that moment, I was simply happy to be alive and in his arms.

"Edward?" I whispered sleepily.

"Hmmm?" he hummed.

"I really need my baby."

I felt him turn his head and I opened my eyes to meet his gaze.

He smiled at me in such a way that it made my heart skip. Even the monitor registered the jump.

"Anything you want, love."

**XXXXXX**

**AN: I sat in my livingroom watching three episodes of Law and Order in a row trying to figure out the interrogation. It's not as easy as one may think. I certainly didn't expect for it to cause such frustration. **

**Next chapter will be wrapping up the drama. I know that many of you are ready for that. So am I. **

**I will try to get the chapter out on time next Thursday, but just be aware that it might not happen. This week's chapter was particularly rough for me. I try very hard to make sure that I keep the quality of my writing and provide good, long, thourough chapters, but sometimes my confidence isn't as high. I want to make sure I don't disappoint as the story comes to a close. I hope that makes sense to everyone. **

**There is, however, another outtake coming out next week. It's an Esme POV that runs up until the weekend of Bella's birthday. **


	37. Repercussions

**AN: Well, I know that you all got the teaser late and some of you not at all. I took an entire 4 days off from writing and it set me back the rest of the week. :o/ You all are amazing with your support and encouragement. I could not do this without you. **

**Quick thank yous so that I can get this baby posted. **

**Thank you sooo much to my FAB-ulous beta, Mollie who balances me and keeps me sane. LOL**

**Thank you to Melee03 and Lexie2516 for pre-reading and comforting. **

**Thank you for all the pimpage. I have gotten so many new followers. I'm completely amazed. :oD **

**Disclaimer as usual. **

**XXXXXX**

Chapter 35: Repercussions

BPOV

I must have dozed off because the next thing I knew, I heard Edward's voice and felt his fingertips passing lightly over my forehead.

"Baby, the doctor's here."

I lifted my eyes, trying to open them, but they were still so heavy and the room was too bright.

"Can you shut the blinds, please?" Edward asked. I didn't know who he was talking to, but whoever it was, did as he asked and the room was suddenly much darker.

I blinked a few times and finally opened my eyes. Edward was standing over me, smiling.

I smiled back weakly and scratched my nose where the oxygen tube was itching horribly.

"I'm thirsty," I rasped.

"We'll get you some water in just a few minutes. I want to check you out first, okay?" I heard someone else say.

I let my head wobble a little in a pathetic nod before a man stepped into my line of sight.

"Hi, Bella. I'm Dr. Boyd."

"Hi," I said weakly.

He got closer to me and waited for me to focus on him.

"I'm going to pull down your gown and take a look, okay?" he asked, waiting for my approval before he actually even touched me. "My hands are a little cold, I'm sorry."

He placed his hands on my shoulder and I winced, sucking in a huge breath of air through my teeth.

"Does that hurt?" he asked glancing at my face.

I stared at him for a moment with a 'duh' look on my face and I heard Edward snicker.

"On a scale of one to ten?" Dr. Boyd asked, shaking his head, but smiling.

"When I'm lying here doing nothing, about a five," I said quietly.

"And when I do this?" He lifted my arm up, rotating my shoulder.

"TEN, TEN, TEN, Ahhh," I yelped.

I could see that Edward was trying to hold himself back from pulling Dr. Boyd away from me. His protective instincts seemed to be going into overdrive. The look on his face told me he wasn't happy about me being in pain and would stop the good doctor if he needed to.

"Hmmmm," he hummed, pressing his fingers in to feel around my shoulder. "It's going to take a couple of weeks to heal," Dr. Boyd sighed. "You'll need to wear a sling to keep it immobile. It will be a little bit longer until you have full range of motion."

"Just because of a dislocated shoulder?" I whimpered.

"Because of the time that it remained dislocated, yes. And it appears as though there's been additional trauma to it as well?"

I nodded slightly before looking towards Edward. His jaw was tight. I wondered how much he knew. I hadn't yet had a chance to tell him what exactly had happened.

"You'll need to stay at least one more night, possibly two. I'd like to make sure that you aren't having any lingering effects from the overdose. You've tested positive for THC, Oxycodone and Chloroform. You were in respiratory failure when EMS got to you so you were given Naloxone in the field."

I looked at him in confusion.

"The Naloxone counters the effects of opiates; the Oxycodone."

"What the fuck?" Edward gasped. "He could have killed her!"

Dr. Boyd nodded gravely. "Luckily he didn't. The first twenty-four hours are the most important."

"What exactly is THC?" I asked.

"Marijuana," Dr. Boyd explained.

I nodded in understanding.

"He got you high?" Edward gaped.

I suddenly felt the need to explain.

"He blew it in my face," I said, lowering my eyes. "I tried not to inhale." My voice was not as strong as I wanted it to be. I sounded weak and I hated it.

"Hey!" Edward said, grabbing my chin to lift my face. "I'm not blaming you. I'm just surprised."

"If you can remember, it will help me to know the timeline," Dr. Boyd said.

"Uh. . . I don't exactly know. He um, he. . ." I swallowed. "I couldn't find Charlie. . . I. . ."

I could feel the pressure building behind my eyes and my head started to throb again. My hands were shaking. All I wanted to do was close my eyes and go back to sleep.

"Can we do this later?" Edward said abruptly. It was not a request. He knew me too well and I was not ready to go over what happened.

"Of course," Dr. Boyd said kindly. "We're still going to have to do some liver function tests just to make sure though, but your pulse ox is normal and your blood pressure is increasing. I'm going to go ahead and approve the transfer upstairs for the rest of your stay, okay? I'll come back and check on you to make sure you're comfortable once you're all settled." He patted my leg and started to leave the room.

"Dr. Boyd?" Edward called, never taking his eyes off me.

"Yes?"

"When she's upstairs, is it okay to bring our son in to see her? He's kinda chompin at the bit to see his mommy."

I heard Dr. Boyd chuckle. "Of course. Just make sure he washes his hands or uses the hand sanitizer when he comes in."

After that, we were left alone.

Edward pulled up the chair next to the bed and picked up my hand in his. "How are you feeling? Really."

"Tired, sore, uncomfortable and a little bit grumpy," I mumbled.

He frowned and tilted his head.

"That's not what I meant, baby," he said, using his free hand to brush a strand of hair behind my ear. "Do you feel like talking about it?"

"No," I sighed. "Not right now."

I felt his thumb rubbing back and forth over my hand.

"Do you?" I asked, suddenly realizing just how much he must have gone through not knowing where Charlie was; not knowing where I was.

Just then a nurse came into the room.

"We're going to start getting you all ready to go," she chirped, not realizing that she had just interrupted us.

Edward smiled softly at me. "Maybe a little later then."

I yawned involuntarily and nodded.

"Sleep, baby," Edward soothed. "I'm not going anywhere."

It took them two hours to move me upstairs. I wasn't actually able to go back to sleep. There was too much going on and the nurse kept coming in and talking to me. After she removed the catheter, I gave up. That shit hurt.

Instead, I guzzled down a whole bunch of water, trying to get rid of the cottonmouth, and tried to eat lunch. True to his word, Edward never left my side.

"I thought you were going to go get Charlie," I asked once I was completely settled in my new room.

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" Edward asked. I knew he was trying to tease, but the amusement didn't reflect in his eyes. I knew he was still thinking of my earlier hesitation. We were going to have to talk about it; about what James had said to me; about what had happened. But I wasn't quite ready.

"I just want to see him," I sighed. I could feel the sleepiness starting to creep up on me again and I blinked heavily. Hopefully, now that I was in a less critical part of the hospital, I wouldn't be poked and prodded by the nurses as much.

"I know you do, love. Your dad's bringing him up. He's gonna text me when they get here."

I snorted lightly. "He's going to text you?"

"Yup. That's what he said."

"Hmmmm."

"Why don't you take a nap, Bella? I'll wake you when they get here."

"I'm not tired," I protested.

Edward lifted his eyebrow at me and smiled crookedly.

"What?" I slurred.

He shook his head. "Nothing. Rest your eyes then."

"Okay," I agreed, letting my eyes shut.

XXXXX

When I opened them again, my room was empty. The television was on, but muted. There were a whole bunch of little soda cans on the tray at the end of my bed and a few apple juice bottles as well. I was so thirsty I could have probably guzzled all of them, but for the moment, I'd be satisfied with one.

I lifted my body trying to get into a sitting position and groaned. My muscles were stiff and achy.

_I want coffee._

I tried to hear if Edward was maybe in the bathroom, but the only sound was coming from the hallway.

I tugged at the oxygen tube. I hated it, but the nurse had already scolded me more than once for pulling it off.

"See, buddy, I told you she'd be awake when we got back."

My head shot up causing a sharp piercing pain to attack my brain, but I ignored it.

Edward was standing in the doorway with Charlie, who was holding a bouquet of red and white carnations; his face so perfect. Like my own personal angel.

I had never in my life seen a more wonderful sight. All the fear and anxiety I had felt since the second I looked down and he was gone hit me like a freight train.

Forgetting about the drinks, I started scrambling to disentangle myself from the bed sheets using my one good arm. I needed to get out. I needed to hold my child and never let him go.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Edward said, jumping forward and trying to stop my movements. "Relax, baby. He's right here."

I took a deep breath and let Edward help me get situated. Charlie was bouncing on his toes behind him, his lip drawn in between his teeth and his eyes wide.

The moment Edward stepped back Charlie pounced, trying to climb the side of the bed. He realized that the flowers in his hand were hindering him and set them down on the bed.

"Charlie," Edward scolded. "You have to be careful with Mommy, remember?"

He nodded sheepishly, but continued scaling. Edward laughed and helped him. Charlie crawled up my uninjured side and nestled in.

I wrapped my arm around his little body as tightly as I could and buried my nose into the top of his head. He smelled like his shampoo.

"I missed you so much," I whispered.

"Me too, Mama. I got wost."

"I know you got lost. I shouldn't have let go of you though, I'm so sorry, baby."

I was torn between holding him close and inspecting every inch of his body for any damage. My eyes went wide with the realization that something could have happened to him. I was so relieved by the fact that he had been found, my brain must have refused to even consider that he had still been hurt.

"Edward?" I asked in a panicked tone. "He's okay?"

Edward nodded affirmatively. "He's fine. He was seen by a doctor and a child therapist."

_A child therapist?_

"How long was he. . .?"

"Two hours. He's okay, Bella. Especially now that he's here. All he needed was his mama."

"What happen to your arm, Mommy?" Charlie asked rubbing his hand gently over the blue sling.

"I hurt it."

"How?"

I hadn't really thought about how I would explain all of this to Charlie. My brain was in too much of a fog. Luckily Edward saved me.

"Charlie, don't you have something for Mommy?"

"Oh, yeah," he smiled, sitting up and reaching for the flowers.

"Are these for me?"

He nodded enthusiastically. "Da red ones is from Daddy. Da white ones is from me."

"Thank you, baby," I grinned, leaning forward and kissing his nose.

When I pulled back I was caught in my son's piercing gaze. He tilted his head and furrowed his brow. His fingers reached up and ghosted over my cheek where James' ring had cut into me and the subsequent bruise that his hand had made.

He didn't say anything, but his eyes kept darting between mine and the cut, a frown fully situated on his face.

"Where's Grampa?" I asked, trying to distract him.

He shrugged.

I turned to face Edward.

"He was here for a few minutes, but he went into the PA station," he said quietly. "They're sending someone over to talk to you in a little bit."

I wasn't looking forward to any line of questioning. I just wanted to forget it all, but I knew that I had to. James and Tanya needed to pay for what they had done.

Charlie continued to sit with me for the afternoon, all but refusing to move. He asked me about the oxygen tube, about the IV, about the pulse oximeter and about the heart monitor. He discovered the bed controls, but I had to put a stop to that when he put me into a sitting position that hurt.

We turned the television onto Nickelodeon and watched four straight episodes of SpongeBob SquarePants. I dozed off and on, startling awake anytime Charlie shifted and almost flying into a blind panic when Edward lifted him from the bed to take him to the bathroom.

Around three-thirty, there was a light knock on the door. We all turned just in time to see Alice and Jasper coming in.

"Hello? Can we come in?" Alice chimed.

Edward glanced at me for my approval before speaking "Yeah, Allie, come on in."

Edward stood up and I watch as Alice wrapped her arms around him, drawing him in and speaking quietly into his ear. He smiled and nodded.

In the meantime, Jasper stepped around them, his tall, lean stature capturing my attention.

"How ya doin, sugar?" he asked raising his eyebrows as he came in to kiss my cheek.

"Well, I suppose I've been better, but it could have been worse," I answered with a shrug, gasping as I realized that it really fucking hurt.

"Hmmm," he hummed lightly, passing his thumb over the bruise on my cheek.

"How bout you, knucklehead?" He ruffled Charlie's hair.

"Good," Charlie answered with a grin. "Mommy's bed moves."

Jasper got a cheeky smile on his face. "So I've heard," he said waggling his eyebrows at me.

I laughed. "Shut it, Jasper."

"Oh, Bella," Alice sighed after letting go of Edward. She pushed Jasper out of the way and bent down to wrap her arms around me, careful not to jostle my shoulder. "I want to ask what happened, but not with Charlie here," she whispered in my ear.

"Do you know anything?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Nothing. Emmett said he didn't know what he was allowed to tell so he wouldn't say anything at all."

"I honestly don't know a whole lot, Alice," I said, pulling my lip in between my teeth and glancing at my son.

"Don't worry about it, sweetie. It doesn't matter right now. All that matters is that you're okay. Both of you." She leaned in and kissed Charlie, who promptly wiped his cheek with the back of his hand.

"Jazz and I are going to get some coffee, are you going to be okay?" Edward asked. He must have seen the look of longing on my face. "Yes, I'll get you one," he laughed. "A good one." He winked and was out the door.

Alice took my mind off of the fact that I was in hospital by telling me all about the plans for her wedding. You'd think I'd been gone for a month. I was happy for the distraction though and by the time Edward and Jasper returned, Charlie was snoring, his face smooshed up against my breast.

Edward started to hand me my coffee, but pulled back teasingly. "For a kiss?"

I puckered my lips, making him chuckle.

"That's attractive." He leaned in and I straightened out my mouth for him so that I could feel his soft lips against my still slightly chapped ones. I let out a sigh at the sweetness of him.

"Oh my God, this is heaven," I moaned as I took my first sip of the caramel macchiato that he had brought me.

There was another knock at the door and the nurse entered.

"There's a detective out here who'd like to talk with you, Bella," she said softly.

I swallowed a hot gulp of coffee, feeling the burn against my throat.

"O. . Okay," I stuttered.

"We'll take Charlie back home," Alice said. She tried to smile, but it came out more like a grimace.

I didn't want to let him go, but I knew that he couldn't stay when I was being questioned. It wouldn't have been fair; even if he was asleep. I didn't know what kind of reaction I was going to have to retelling what James had put me through and I didn't want Charlie to accidentally wake up.

There was another knock at the door and Detective Laurent stepped in. I was beginning to think that Edward and I were single handedly keeping him employed the last couple of months.

"Charlie," I whispered.

He stirred, but didn't wake. It wasn't until Jasper went to pick him up that his eyes shot open. It was like he went into an epileptic fit. The screams and cries coming from him were desperate and absolutely terrified.

"Hey, hey, hey," Jasper tried to calm him. "Charlie, hey, bud, calm down."

"No, no , no," Charlie screeched. "Moooooomy!"

I stared helplessly at my son. Jasper's expression only betrayed him slightly as he struggled not to drop Charlie in the middle of his fit. I watched his arm muscles tense as he held my son to him tightly and whispered in his ear.

Edward leaned in to minimize the flailing limbs. I could see his lips moving as well, but I couldn't hear what he was saying.

Finally, after a couple of agonizing minutes, Charlie began to calm. His breath became nothing but shuddering sobs and his body went limp.

I didn't realize that I was crying until I went to tug at the oxygen tube again and felt the wetness all over my face.

"I. . .(sniffle). . .don't. . . (sniffle). . .wanna. . .(sniffle) go," he sobbed. "I. . (sniffle). . want. . . (sniffle) . . my mommy (sniffle sniffle)."

I reached out for him and Jasper handed him back to me. "Baby, I'm not going anywhere. Uncle Jasper and Auntie Alice are going to take you out while Mommy and Daddy talk to the police officer, okay. Then you can come back."

"Powice Offcer?" he sniffled again.

"Uh huh," I said, pointing to Detective Laurent. "That man right there is a police officer."

Charlie stared at him for second and then looked back at me. "Wike Grampa?"

"Just like Grampa," I assured.

He looked at me and then back at Laurent and then at me again. "Okay," he whimpered.

I let out a puff of air as Jasper took him back.

"We'll get him some dinner while we're out too, Bella," Alice said as she rubbed his back.

I plastered a smile on my face and waved as they left the room. I felt slightly nauseous at the thought of letting him go. I knew that he'd be safe with Jasper and Alice, but it still wasn't easy.

"I thought you said he was okay," I said looking at Edward's worn out face.

I wasn't angry, but my heart was broken that my child seemed more traumatized than anyone thought; or more than anyone was telling me.

"It's not unusual in children who have been taken from their parents," Laurent told us. "He wasn't physically injured, but he will need time and reassurance. Just like you will," he added.

Edward moved to the chair on the opposite side of my bed, offering Detective Laurent the one closest to the door.

I tried to mentally prepare myself for what was coming, but I just couldn't.

"Bella, I know it's hard to talk about, but we need to know what happened," Detective Laurent said warmly. "Can you start at the beginning?"

"Um, when. . . do you mean like when he took me?"

"We know that you took Charlie to go to the bathroom. Did you notice anything suspicious or out of place then?"

I shook my head. "No. Everything was fine. I never would have. . . I wouldn't have ever let go of him if I thought that anything was wrong," I stuttered.

"Okay, Bella, it's okay. So you went to the bathroom and then what happened?"

I told him about stopping by the tent and the moment that I noticed that Charlie was gone. I told him about searching for him, calling Edward and then having the hand and dirty rag put over my mouth.

"And you were unconscious the whole time? Do you remember where he took you?"

"I was completely out. I don't remember anything until I woke up in the cabin."

"Can you describe the cabin?"

I did my best to tell them everything I could remember, but my memory was fuzzy from the drugs.

"Bella, I know this is going to be hard, but we need to know exactly what he did to you in that cabin. We need to know everything he said."

Edward's hand squeezed mine tightly, concern written all over his face.

"He didn't rape me," I said quickly, figuring that's what they really wanted to know.

"We know," Detective Laurent confirmed.

"How. . .?"

"The doctor performed a sexual assault exam when you were first brought in. But it's good to have confirmation," he nodded.

I frowned.

"There's a window for evidence collection," Detective Laurent explained. "If he _had_ assaulted you, we needed to get that as quickly as possible. Because you were unconscious, informed consent was presumed."

I wasn't sure how to feel about that. I didn't like the fact that they had done it while I was unconscious, but would it have been worse to be awake for it? Probably.

"Did he touch you in any other way?"

"Um, not sexually. He made some comments about how beautiful I was and that I must be a really good. . ." I stopped and grimaced. "That I must be good in bed," I finished quietly.

Edward coughed and cleared his throat. He looked extremely agitated. I guess I couldn't blame him. It was probably just as hard for him to hear as it was for me to say.

I started from the moment I woke up on the musty old couch, carefully recalling each and every word he said to me as clearly as I could remember it.

When I was recalling what James had told me about Edward's. . . extracurricular activities, I felt his grip tighten. I could see his body go rigid out of the corner of my eye and when I turned slightly to glance at him, his face was red, his eyes black.

"Bella, you don't. . . you don't believe him, do you?" Edward asked, his voice breaking.

I opened my mouth, not quite sure what was going to come out, when Laurent interrupted.

"Sorry, but we need to get through this. He said he's been following Edward?"

"Yes," I nodded, not looking away from the sad eyes of the man I loved. I didn't believe James, at all. I knew that he was trying to get to me, trying to make me doubt Edward.

I lifted our entwined hands and kissed his knuckles trying to tell him silently that we were good. From the look on his face, I'm not sure he believed me though.

"He said that the original plan was to take Charlie too," I continued.

The low throaty growl emanating from Edward's chest alerted me that he knew more about that story.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing," Edward said, looking away from me.

"No, I wanna know."

Edward looked over at Laurent.

"Bella, we can talk about it later," Edward insisted.

"Bella, I apologize, but we really do just need to get through your statement," Laurent added.

"I'm not answering any more of your questions until you answer one of mine."

Edward groaned and threw his head backwards.

"Bella," Detective Laurent sighed. "I want to make sure we get an accurate account of what happened. I promise you that we will answer your questions once I've completed my line of questioning."

After a few minutes of trying to maintain my position, I gave in. Providing information that could put James and Tanya behind bars was far more important than my need for information.

I sighed deeply. "He asked me how Edward managed to lure women away from their partners; how he lured me away from Riley."

"I. . ." Edward started and then stopped when Laurent shot him a stern look.

"I asked him what he was going to do to me; if he was going to rape me, but he said no. He said he didn't need to because Tanya had given him enough money to stay hidden for a while and I'd eventually let him have me because I had no other choice."

I didn't look at Edward, but I could feel the vibrations of his anger through his fingertips.

"He said Tanya gave him money?" Laurent asked.

"Yeah."

I continued on, telling him about the pot and the cocaine and about me kicking James in the face.

"You did that?" Edward asked, letting his anger slip a little and surprised amusement take over for a moment.

"Yeah, but then he hit me back," I responded, touching my cut and bruised cheek gingerly.

And then the amusement was gone and the anger was back.

"When he took me outside to leave, I started screaming. So he pulled me back in and forced a pill down my throat before dousing the rag with something in a little brown bottle and covering my mouth. That's it. I don't remember anything else, other than him telling me that Edward had stolen his wife."

"I didn't fucking steal his wife," Edward huffed.

"That's everything?" Laurent asked, ignoring Edward.

I nodded. "Did it help?"

He smiled at me. "Yes, Bella. It actually helped quite a bit."

"Now," I said narrowing my eyes and glancing between the two men in the room. "I know you're hiding something from me."

Edward's hand was in his hair. "James said the original plan was to 'take out' both you and Charlie."

It was like somebody had suddenly sucked all the air out of the room. Whatever breath was left in my body left me violently. My blood ran cold.

There were no words. No words to express how I felt in that moment.

"They were gonna kill my baby?"

Sensing my imminent breakdown, Edward was suddenly on my bed, his knees straddling my thighs as he tried to help me focus. His hands were on my face and he was talking to me. He was trying to ground me.

"Bella, we've got them. They're in jail. They can't hurt Charlie, they can't hurt you."

I was almost numb. Like my brain couldn't quite process what emotion it wanted to feel. Should I feel angry? Sad? Guilty? Horrified? Maybe my body had finally reached its emotional threshold.

Detective Laurent excused himself quietly telling us he'd be in touch.

Edward slid me over and then moved so that he was underneath me on my good side. He held me to him.

I don't know how long I just lay there, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. I couldn't sleep anymore, but I wasn't quite awake either.

"I'm sorry," Edward sighed suddenly.

"For what?" I murmured against his chest.

"For all of this."

I lifted my head. His eyes were closed, but he opened them slightly, gazing down at me through his lashes.

"Stop apologizing," I frowned.

I felt his hand running down my hair and he shook his head. "I just feel guilty," he murmured.

"Well stop!" I said, my voice rising angrily.

I knew that I was letting my emotions get the better of me. I wasn't actually angry with Edward, but I was at the same time. I was tired of the self deprecation. I got that he thought that this was his fault, but at the end of the day, James and Tanya had to be responsible for their own actions. Revenge was no excuse to do what they did.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and then rubbed his bloodshot eyes.

"Edward," I sighed. "I want you to promise me something."

"Anything, baby," he said, a hint of sadness still in his voice.

"Apologize to me when you use all the hot water. Apologize to me when you load the dishwasher the wrong way, but please, just stop apologizing for things that happened long before we were together; for things you simply cannot change."

I laid my head back down with a huff and waited for his response.

"Sorry," he said cheekily. I didn't even need to look at him to know that there was a smirk on his face.

I growled and felt his chest vibrate in silent laughter.

"Do you know how much I love you? How much I adore every last square inch of you?"

"Every last one?" I asked in disbelief.

Edward pretended to think for a minute. "Maybe not this freckle," he said. "It's kind of a funny shape."

I slapped at his chest before tilting my head up for a kiss.

"I need to take a shower. I feel fucking gross," I whined.

"Do you need help?" Edward asked.

"You'd like that wouldn't you?"

He chuckled. "I actually meant that I'd _help_ you."

"Uh huh."

"Seriously, Bella. Let me just tell them so that they don't come walking in on us."

He slipped out of the bed and disappeared out the door. When he came back in, he was smiling and holding about four more of those little soda cans.

"What's so funny?" I asked.

Edward shut the door with a click. "The nurse said no funny business or I'm going to lose my privileges."

"What privileges?"

He smiled crookedly at me. "The seemingly never-ending supply of apple juices and ginger ales I keep bringing in here," he laughed holding up the cans.

"Ah, I see. Well no funny business then, cause I don't know how I'd ever live without four ounce cans of ginger ale and juice," I teased.

Edward swept his arms under my knees and around my back and lifted me from the bed with just the slightest of squeals coming from me.

"My legs work just fine, you know?" I protested.

"Yes, I do know, but I want to carry you?"

"I'm still attached," I said motioning towards my IV.

There was a knock at the door and it opened as Edward and I turned our heads.

"That's what I'm here for," the nurse said cheerily. Then she pursed her lips. "You do know there's nothing wrong with her legs, right?" she said, raising an eyebrow. "I'm sure simply helping her walk would suffice."

Edward and I laughed.

"I'm giving you guys half an hour before I come in. Do you have anything to change into or do you want me to get you a fresh hospital gown?"

"My sister brought some pajamas in for her," Edward answered for me, pointing to a small duffel next to the bed.

"When you're ready to get dressed, just come get me and I'll help, okay?"

When we got to the bathroom, Edward set me down on the toilet and turned on the shower. He pulled off his shirt, exposing his gorgeous six pack. I watched him as he discarded the fabric onto the floor and began pulling off his shoes and socks.

He continued to undress, unbuttoning his jeans and letting them drop so that he was only standing in a pair of black boxer briefs. That's about the time he caught me staring. He smirked and hooked his fingers in his underwear before they joined the rest of his clothes.

He wasn't hard. . . yet. I bet I could get him that way pretty quick though. I licked my lips.

"No funny business," he glared playfully.

"I'm not laughing."

He held out his hand for me and I grabbed it using my good arm, allowing him to pull me up. I was already naked under the hospital gown so with two simple tie pulls, the gown fell to the floor.

"Uh, wait here," he said, opening the bathroom door and peaking out before disappearing buck naked. When he came back he had the duffel in his hands.

"Alice brought your stuff," he grinned, reaching in and pulling out two bottles. He set them down and then pulled out my body wash and my purple poofy.

Edward stepped into the shower first and then helped me in. I held my injured arm close to my body, trying not to move it.

The hot water felt amazing. I closed my eyes and let it just fall onto my face. It was almost as though I were washing any traces of James from myself. The feel of his arms wrapping around me when he took me away. His breath on my face, his voice in my ear. I wanted it all to go away.

Edward was behind me. I felt his hands glide over my shoulders and down my arms, being exceptionally careful around my injured shoulder. His lips placed a gentle, wet kiss on the large purple bruise before he leaned down to pick up the bottle of shampoo.

His hands ran through my hair, lifting it off my neck and up onto the top of my head while he lathered and cleaned.

I moaned as he massaged his fingers against my scalp and felt him harden against my back.

I leaned back into him trying to give him a little friction.

"Bella, baby, please stop," he begged, pulling his hips away.

"Why?"

"Because I'm trying to take care of you," he explained. "And the nurse said no," he added almost under his breath.

"You asked the nurse if you could have sex with me?" I giggled, turning around so that I could see his face.

"No, not really," he said looking sheepish. "But when I asked if I could get in the shower with you to help, she warned me not to even think about it."

"For how long?"

"A week, maybe two; once the sling comes off."

I gaped at him. "Really?"

"Yeah, really. So. . if you could turn your little tail around so I can finish your hair, that'd be great."

I looked down at his impressive erection. "But you're so hard."

"I can take care of it myself, turn around."

"Can I watch?"

"No," he snorted. "Not right now."

He gripped my hips gently and turned me back around before squirting the conditioner onto my head and working that through as well. After that, he put some of the body wash on the poofy. Starting at my feet, he carefully covered me in suds. I jumped and whimpered when he dragged it between my legs, the texture rubbing against my clit. I heard him snicker and looked back to scowl at him.

"It's much more fun when we're both frustrated and can't do anything about it."

"Yeah, but you can take care of your problem yourself," I snipped.

"I promise, baby, when we get the okay, I will take care of every single one of your problems, again and again, and again." He punctuated each 'again' with a kiss to my neck.

"I gotta get out of this fucking shower before I jump you and we get ourselves in trouble."

"Agreed," he said, placing one more kiss to the side of my head and then stepping out.

The hospital towels were not soft or comfortable. They were scratchy and too small. And they smelled like bleach. But they served their purpose. Edward dressed quickly and then helped me into some underwear and yoga pants.

He wrapped a towel around my shoulders and I sat on the bed, waiting while he got the nurse to help me put on a shirt. It was a simple cotton button up pajama shirt, but it still kinda hurt getting into it. Edward buttoned it up.

I saw the nurse smile when he kissed my nose and then my lips.

"Do you want me to have them bring up some dinner?" she asked as she reattached my IV to the fluid bag.

As if on cue, my stomach growled.

"I'll take that as a yes then. Look through the menu and come find me when you know what you want."

We were just able to finish our meals when Charlie came bounding back in, followed by Alice and Jasper.

Alice had an innocent look on her face, but Jasper looked like he was about to completely lose himself.

I narrowed my eyes as Charlie clamored back up onto my bed. Alice just smiled sweetly at me. Edward noticed something was off too.

"What's up?" he asked suspiciously.

"Nothing," Jasper responded, letting out a little chuckle.

"Bullshit!"

"Bullshit!" Charlie shouted.

My mouth gaped open, Edward's head whipped around, Alice gasped, and Jasper snorted.

"That's a grown-up word, Charlie," I scolded.

Charlie wrinkled up his nose and pouted up his lips.

I decided not to give it anymore attention, but I had to disguise my laugh as a cough as I saw the rest of the family trying not to encourage him.

"So. . ." Edward said, clearing his throat. "What's going on?"

"Your mom and dad are downstairs," Jasper smiled, his eyes bright.

"Okay," Edward said, looking confused. "Are they coming up?"

"Gramma has an owie," Charlie piped up. I could see him trying to slyly pick up the bed remote and I moved it out of his reach.

"What happened to Mom?" Edward asked Alice.

Alice rolled her eyes. "I'm gonna let her tell you."

We sat and chatted for about another twenty minutes before I heard Carlisle and Esme's voices coming from outside of the room. When they entered, I could see that Esme had a soft cast on her right wrist that covered her whole hand.

"Esme! What happened?" I gasped.

She waved me off and came up to the bed.

"First of all. . ." she wrapped her arms around me, hugging me tightly and planting kisses on my head. "I am so happy that you are okay," she whispered. "Are you feeling okay?" She leaned back and frowned at the sling and then at the bruise on my face.

"I'm okay," I smiled softly. "I was lucky."

Her eyes darkened for a minute, something I had never seen in Esme before. She stepped back to let Carlisle in. He, of course, did the doctor thing. After kissing my forehead he grabbed my chin, looked me in the eyes, scanned me, checked all the monitors that I was hooked up to.

"Satisfied?" I laughed.

"Hmmmm," he hummed, his lips twitching. "I think I can break you out of here tomorrow if I promise to keep an eye on you." He winked as I nodded. I was ready to go home.

"Now, what exactly happened?" I heard Edward ask as he held up his mother's arm.

Carlisle sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"She deserved it," Esme growled.

"Who deserved what?" I asked for clarification.

Esme looked down. "She shouldn't have messed with my family," she mumbled.

I stared at her.

_She didn't. Did she?_

Jasper started snickering.

"Oh, Mom," Edward groaned. "Tell me you didn't."

Esme looked sheepish.

"We went to the station to talk to Chief Swan. That's where he said he was when we called. When we got there, she was there. She saw us and started screaming about how much she loved us and how we were always such a caring family. When I told her that she meant nothing to us; that she was a horrible, selfish, delusional. . . B.I.T.C.H, she spit on me." Esme went to cover Charlie's ears. "So I punched her," she stage whispered.

"In the face," Carlisle added, his lips pursed.

Esme let go of Charlie's ears and smiled affectionately down at him.

"Oh my God!" I sort of groan laughed.

"Is your hand okay?" Edward asked.

"I sprained my wrist and fractured a knuckle. I'll be fine," she shrugged. "I've never done that before and I'll probably never do it again, but that woman has been on my last nerve for a very long time."

I wondered if I would get a chance to confront Tanya or James. As much as I wanted to, it's not like I could deck them, my shoulder wouldn't allow for that.

"Are you going to get into trouble?" Edward said drawing his mother into a hug.

"No. She assaulted me first. In any case, they must have found something on her, because she was in handcuffs."

I looked up at Edward. Detective Laurent had not said anything about whether or not Tanya was going to be charged with anything.

"Your dad said he'd be over as soon as he was finished, Bella," Carlisle told me. "We just wanted to come by and see you; make sure everything was okay and talk to the doctor about taking you home tomorrow. In fact, let me go see what I can do."

A short while later, everyone left to head back to their respective homes. Carlisle had actually convinced Dr. Boyd to let me go home after assuming his morning check-in went well.

"I'm going to take Charlie home, but I'll be back after he goes to sleep, okay?" Edward said kissing me gently. "Your dad's going to be here soon, but are you okay to be on your own?"

"Yes, Edward, I am. I'm probably just going to go to sleep. If you want to just come back in the morning, you can."

He shook his head. "I don't want to leave you."

"So you're going to sleep in that uncomfortable hospital chair and wake up grumpy?"

He looked at me sadly. "I can't sleep in the apartment without you," he admitted. "I don't want to. I'd wake up uncomfortable and grumpy no matter what."

He glanced at Charlie, who was driving a car along the chair rail on the wall, and then back at me.

"Are we okay?" he asked quietly.

I nodded and crooked my finger. When he bent down I cupped his jaw. "We will be."

"I love you," he whispered, ghosting his lips over mine.

"So much," I whispered back.

XXXXX

My dad appeared about an hour later, but I was just too tired to ask him what had been going on. I didn't wake up when Edward returned; I didn't wake up when my father left. I didn't wake up until about four in the morning when a nightmare ripped through me.

Edward tried to calm me while two nurses came running in. Once they were satisfied that my problem was not medically related, they left me alone.

I couldn't actually even remember the nightmare, but it was one of those where you wake up and your heart is pounding wildly and you feel so light headed that you think you're going to pass out. Unfortunately, I couldn't go back to sleep either. Instead, Edward went to retrieve me a cup of coffee and I proceeded to watch two episodes of Angel followed by an episode of Charmed.

A few hours and one doctor's signature later I was allowed to leave. Much to my dismay, I was forced to ride in a wheelchair down to the entrance where Edward helped me into the beamer.

Apparently my dad was going to come over a little later and fill us in on what was happening.

The welcome home was quiet. Esme and Carlisle greeted us as did Emmett. Rose was apparently home with the stomach flu, but she sent her love. Edward had decided to keep Charlie home from school and the three of us spent a quiet afternoon huddled together on the sofa watching movies and reading books.

Just before dinner, my dad showed up and we called Esme to come grab Charlie so that he could help her make dinner, since I was completely useless.

"Has Edward told you what he knows?" My dad asked.

Edward nodded.

"Well, first of all let me tell you what happened yesterday. The detectives located Irina Hunter's parents. They weren't a whole lot of help other than to tell them that she's living in Miami under the name Irina Mozarov. Apparently that was her mother's maiden name. They were able to send the police to her home and they picked her up."

We listened to my father carefully. Edward had an intense look in his eyes. He didn't appear nervous, but he didn't appear completely calm either.

"The stations in Miami and Port Angeles used Skype to conduct an interview with her. She confirmed that she never had an affair with Edward."

I held back the sigh of relief that was itching to be released. I hadn't doubted Edward when he told me that he hadn't slept with Irina, but it was good to hear anyway.

"I told them I didn't," Edward said smugly. "So why the hell did she say I did?"

"She was trying to get out of an unhappy marriage. She said James was obsessive and possessive. He was bordering on abusive. He had seen you two walking together and started accusing her of sleeping around. She said she finally got fed up and in the middle of a fight told him that you had been having an affair and that she was leaving him for you."

I put my hand over my face. The poor girl had no idea what she was setting in motion.

"Did you tell her what was going on here?" I sighed.

"Yes. I think she just about had a nervous breakdown. It took nearly twenty minutes to get her to stop sobbing long enough to ask her a few more questions. She claims that she didn't realize that he would go after Edward, much less his family. She wanted to call and apologize."

"I. . . I don't need to talk to her," Edward said gritting his teeth. "I get that she wanted out, but Bella and I, and Charlie too, are paying enough for my own mistakes, why the fuck should we have to pay for hers?"

"I know, son. I figured you wouldn't want to, but I told her I'd pass it on."

"I just want to get past all of this. I want James and Tanya to go to hell. I want to marrrrrr...pheph," Edward stopped his sentence, his fist was over his mouth and his eyes were closed. "I just want to move on," he said after a second of calming himself.

My dad was looking at Edward, his mustache twitching slightly and then he looked at me. I had no idea what had just happened.

"How are you feeling, Bells?"

"I'm okay, Dad. What else?" I asked impatiently.

He took a deep breath. "They arraigned both James and Tanya today, separately. James is going to make a plea bargain in exchange for a lesser sentence."

"A lesser sentence?" Edward growled. "What kind of lesser sentence?"

"They're dismissing all of the lesser charges. He's pleading guilty to kidnapping and conspiracy to commit murder and he's agreed to testify against Tanya."

"Why are they dismissing all of those charges?" I asked.

"The possible jail term for those charges adds up to more than the conspiracy charge. His attorney is trying to get him the best deal possible."

"Fuck that!" Edward snapped. "What kind of jail terms?"

I was absolutely petrified that the man would end up getting something like five years for what he had done.

"The kidnapping charge carries a term of fifteen to twenty-five years and the conspiracy charge twelve to twenty-four years.

"When would he be eligible for parole?" Edward frowned.

"I don't know," Dad shrugged. "That's up to the judge."

He nodded.

"What about Tanya?"

"She's also going to be charged with conspiracy to commit murder as well as kidnapping of a minor child. She plead not guilty though. The DA argued that she's a flight risk and because she's being charged with a crime involving a child, she's being held without bail. If she's found guilty, she could go to prison for life."

"How likely is that?"

He shook his head. "I don't know. She doesn't have any priors and they're going to make her look like a victim up there. James isn't the most reliable witness. He's an addict and Tanya went out of her way to set him up. It's all up to the evidence."

"Have they found any?"

"Yes, but they haven't told me what it is. They've searched her car, home, her parents' home and James provided the location of the cabin so I believe they are sweeping that as well."

"She's not going to get off is she, Daddy?" I practically begged.

He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed. "I hope not, Bells. But. . ."

"But what?"

My dad cleared his throat, obviously not comfortable with what he was about to say. That made me nervous.

"They may need Charlie to testify."

I yanked myself out of his arms.

"No!" I snapped. "Absolutely not."

"Bella?"

"I said no. He's a baby. How can you even ask me to allow that?"

"He won't have to testify in court. He can testify in front of the judge and the feed will be seen in the courtroom."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't care."

"It will be like he's just having a conversation. We've gotten special permission for Leslie Ripley to talk to him. He won't even realize what's going on. The judge wouldn't allow either the prosecution or the defense to talk to him at all."

"Who's Leslie Ripley?"

"She's the therapist who talked to him right after Tanya showed up with him," Edward said quietly.

There was something in his voice that made me nervous.

"What do you think about this?" I asked. I tried to catch him so that he had to look me in the eyes, but he wouldn't look up at me.

"I want Tanya to go to jail," he murmured. "I don't want Charlie to be traumatized any more by this, but if she gets out, I will never feel comfortable. I will never be able to let him out of my sight. He deserves to live a life without having to worry about some psychotic obsessed woman stealing him away again."

I breathed out loudly and shook my head. I understood what Edward was saying and I agreed, but I wanted it to happen without Charlie having to go through that.

"It's not a decision that needs to be made today," Dad interjected. "The preliminary hearing is set for Friday. They expect all the evidence to be back by then and they'll make the call. If they can avoid putting him up there, they will, but the more evidence there is, the more likely it is that she'll be found guilty."

Edward put his hand on my back and started rubbing circles.

"Just think about it, Bella?" My dad said.

"Fine, dad. I'll think about it."

XXXXXXX

EPOV

I stayed home from the clinic all week to make sure that Bella had what she needed. She couldn't drive so when Charlie needed to go to school, I took him. I double checked to see if he was okay to go and although he was a little clingier than usual, he eventually let go of me.

He had started sleeping in our bed again, but instead of coming in sometime during the night, he just begged and pleaded to start out there in the first place. How could we say no?

I talked to Leslie, the therapist about it and she agreed that allowing him to feel comfortable was not necessarily a bad thing, but we would need to start encouraging him to sleep in his own bed again fairly soon. We also had to start using pull-ups at night. We learned that after the first night when Bella and I woke up to a whimpering child and a wet bed.

Two hours. Two hours in Tanya's 'care' and our child was reduced to panic attacks and bed-wetting. I wanted to kill her. He didn't talk about her. He didn't talk about anything she said, but I knew that it was her fault.

Our family had been incredibly supportive. Not once did a single one of them criticize or blame, not even Chief Swan. From the moment Bella was released from the hospital, they surrounded the three of us; doing anything and everything they could to help.

On Friday afternoon, Bella and I sat in Starbucks after dropping Charlie off at school. We drank our coffee and ate muffins in silence, holding hands across the table. We were waiting for a call from Chief Swan to tell us if they had enough evidence to prosecute Tanya. He was being allowed to witness the preliminary hearing.

It seemed like it was taking fucking forever, but every time I looked at my watch only a few minutes had passed.

Bella's shoulder was healing faster than they expected, which was pretty impressive considering she wouldn't stop fucking using it. I had caught her scrubbing dishes and helping Charlie change his clothes. When I caught her getting into the shower by herself, I drew the line.  
It had nothing to do with the fact that I enjoyed showering with her. Even if there still wasn't any funny business, I liked covering her naked body in soap suds. And she enjoyed watching me get myself off all over her so that I had to wash her again.

The bruise on her face as well as the others on her body had turned yellowish-green and the cut was scabbed over. I can only imagine what people must have thought whenever we went into public. Those in Forks knew, of course. It hadn't taken twenty-four hours for the whole town to know exactly what had happened. People were constantly staring and whispering whenever we went anywhere, but we ignored them.

Angela had come over a few times to visit with Bella so that she wasn't completely consumed by me. I tried not to be hurt when she asked to have some 'girl time'. It was around that time that I realized that I hadn't really bothered to reconnect with any friends since coming back. I had been so absorbed in Bella, Charlie, my family and the clinic that I just hadn't even thought about it. The only people I really still kept in touch with were Brian and Chelsea.

They were absolutely horrified to hear what had happened to Bella and Charlie. Chelsea kept up with the 'I told you she belonged in the mental hospital' until I threatened to hang up on her. Then she pleaded with me to bring my family back.

Her pleading brought up another topic. Medical school. Bella and I needed to make a decision. And I fully intended on proposing to her before we left Forks, wherever we were headed. I had begun to think of it more and more. About the right time and place. I needed to let all of this die down though. I didn't want any of it tainted by Tanya and James. My mind was working overtime. I wanted it to be perfect and I was going to need my family's help.

Finally, at just after ten, my phone rang.

"Hello?"

_"Hey, Edward."_

"What's the news?" I asked eagerly.

_"James was easy. He'll be sentenced next week." _

"Did they ever tell him that Irina lied to him? That I never slept with his wife?"

I could hear the chief let out a large breath of air.

_"Yeah, they did." _

"What did he say?" I asked curiously. After everything he'd done; all the accusations and justifications he made, I couldn't imagine James taking that news well.

_"I'm not sure if he said anything, but he tore up his cell and then got into a fight with another prisoner. He's pretty banged up. He was in the infirmary for almost two days. Now they have him on suicide watch." _

I tried not to, but I couldn't help but get a little comfort out of knowing that he too was feeling Karma's wrath.

"And Tanya?"

_"They have a lot of evidence against her. They found the car seat that was stolen from your car with her fingerprints all over it as well as the toys from your apartment. They also found some of Charlie's clothes in the apartment she shared with James in Tacoma. James didn't trust her, that's obvious. He had a whole stash of things that Tanya had supposedly told him to get rid of. They also connected the money transfer to her. There's a lot."_

I could hear the 'but' in his voice.

"They still want Charlie to testify." It wasn't a question, I knew the answer.

_"Yes, they do. They're calling James and Jessica Stanley, but Charlie will be the final nail in her coffin."_

"Jessica?"

Bella tilted her head at me and narrowed her eyes.

_"Apparently Tanya's girl talk consisted of threatening Bella and Charlie. Jessica claims that she thought it was just her venting, but she's willing to testify that the threats were made."_

"Fucking bitch," I growled, not really knowing which one I was talking about. "Bella and I will talk about it and get a hold of Detective Laurent," I said sourly.

_"Her trial is set for April fourth. In the meantime, she's going to be held at Mission Creek in Belfair and James is being shipped to Monroe."_

"Thanks, Chief."

_"No problem, son. I'll see you guys this weekend." _

I hit disconnect and took a long drag of coffee before filling Bella in on what her father had told me.

"As long as he doesn't know what's going on and he doesn't have to see her in person," Bella practically whimpered.

"Are you sure?" I asked hesitantly.

"Yeah. She needs to be locked up and if Charlie can help, then we can get him through it, right?"

I laced my fingers with hers and brought them up to my mouth. "Absolutely, baby."

She flashed me a sweet smile and I winked at her.

"I love you," she whispered.

"So much," I said, stealing her line.

XXXXXXX

**AN: Alright, I did as much research as humanly possible in just a few days to make sure I was accurate on the drugs and the medical and legal stuff, but if I screwed something up, just pretend, okay? ;oD**

**Next week: Sentences are given and decisions are made. :oD **

**The Esme POV has been posted under Unplanned Perfection Outtakes. **

**I will also be posting the first chapter of The Demons in My Dreams on Tuesday 4/26. Summary: 27 y.o. social worker Bella Swan has seen her fair share of troubled souls, but nothing like Edward Cullen, part owner & manager of The Cullen House Group Home. Will he allow her into his life? And can she survive the demons that haunt him? OOC, Lemons . There will be no posting schedule as of yet. I still have to finish UP.**

**For those of you looking for my other pieces, don't worry, I'm working on those as well. **

**Rec: That's right I'm doing a rec this week. And it's a first for me to rec a story by an author that I've already rec'd, but I love it (and her)so much. **

**No Holds Barred by jayhawkbb: This is my summary b/c I'm too lazy to go get hers. LOL. Bella is a dancer. When she finally decides to open up her own studio, she does so next to a bar owned by none other than Edward Cullen. They try to avoid each other, but that's not so easy when they share a parking lot. Go check it out. **


	38. Trials and Tribulations

**AN: I tried. I tried really hard, but it was not happening yesterday. I apologize. I underestimated the amount of. . . everything that had to go into this chapter. **

**Mollie burned the midnight oil with me and then spent all day with me today to beta this beast and make it so much better, as she usually does. :oD**

**Mel and Lexie, thank you so much for being on stand-by for all that time to pre-read. Mwah!**

**I've been getting a shitload of new readers. I don't know from where, but thank you to everyone pimping me and this story. And thank you to everyone who is giving me a chance and for all the reviews and PM's and tweets. I sincerely appreciate it. **

**Again, I tried to do a lot of research for this chapter, but please allow a little creative freedom because some of the information is hard to find. The legal system is confusing and the laws are different in every single jurisdiction. **

**So here it is:**

**XXXXXXX**

Chapter 36: Trials and Tribulations

EPOV

I held onto Bella's hand as we ascended the stairs to the courthouse. We were both silent. Tanya's attorney requested that the case be moved to Seattle, arguing that she couldn't receive a fair trial in such a small county. He was right, she wouldn't, but that wasn't something I particularly cared about. At least not until our own attorney explained that if she wasn't given a fair trial the first time around, the verdict could get overturned.

The downside of having the trial in Seattle...The fucking press. They were all over the place, taking our picture and asking us questions, like what we thought the verdict would be and how Charlie was doing. It was hard to be gracious at a time like this. I got that they wanted their story, but they needed to understand that we weren't there for them. We didn't care if they sold more newspapers or got higher ratings. We just wanted justice.

Even with the police escort, people were getting too close. Bella was uncomfortable and agitated. I was just happy that Charlie was at home. I could only imagine how the media circus would have affected him.

I squeezed her hand to provide her whatever comfort I could give, but I knew that nothing could calm the nerves.

She turned to look at me, a tiny, anxious smile gracing her lips before the doors were opened and we entered the building.

As they closed heavily behind us, the noise of the crowd was suddenly cut off, replaced by the echoing sound of the large marble foyer. The click of women's heels and the hushed whispers of attorney's, clerks, and other people who were going about their daily business.

XXXXX

It had been a long fucking journey. Over two months of waiting for the defense to get their shit together. Carlisle's attorney, Cameron, had told us that the fact that we were having the trial so quickly was amazing. Sometimes people waited months and even years for their cases to go to trial. Apparently, at the preliminary hearing, Tanya's attorney had requested due consideration for a speedy trial in accordance to her rights. Cameron explained that it could mean a lot of things, but it was most likely due to the defense worrying that the more time the prosecution had to collect evidence, the worse off their case would be.

XXXXX

James' sentencing had been scheduled for the Friday after his preliminary hearing. I wanted to go and look the motherfucker in the eye as he found out what everything he'd done based on a fucking lie was going to get him. Of course, my girl wanted the same thing.

The Wednesday before, we fought. Badly. I loved her. I loved her so fucking much that if she asked me to find a way to end him, I would have. But I didn't want her anywhere near _him_ ever again. I knew he couldn't hurt her there, and maybe I was just being an asshole, but I put my foot down. Or at least, I tried to. That was probably my first big mistake.

"Stop trying to dictate what I do, Edward! It's my right to be there," she snapped.

"Absolutely not, Bella. Don't fucking do this."

"Do what? The man took me off the street. He drugged me and hit me and I'm pretty sure that regardless of what he said, if he managed to get me out of the state, he would have eventually raped me and probably killed me. I DESERVE to be there when he's put away."

I winced and grabbed at my hair. She was hitting me where it hurt and she knew it.

We were both wound up. We hadn't had a moment's peace after the preliminary hearings. The press had caught on to what was apparently a huge newsworthy story. There were a lot of the small local newspapers, but there were also some from Seattle and Tacoma as well as some television stations. There were even a few that had come from Boston.

They camped out at the end of our property and followed us everywhere we went. They were fucking relentless. This only added to Charlie's anxiety and I almost decked one guy who got too close when we tried to have lunch at the diner one afternoon. He actually tried to ask Charlie a fucking question. If my son hadn't been standing right there, the guy's face would have been introduced to my fist.

Bella and I hadn't had a chance to spend any time alone either. Every other time we were stressed, sex was our preferred method of dealing. We could quickly fuck out our anger, fear, frustration and pain and then make love for as long as we needed to; feeling and connecting. Replacing all the bad with all the good. But our focus had shifted. First of all, Bella still had a lingering pain in her shoulder and I was afraid that I would re-injure it if I lost my control or concentration at all; which I often did when she was naked.

Second, Charlie was refusing to sleep on his own, clinging to us whenever possible. I was having trouble figuring out how to balance my need for physical closeness with Bella and my need to make my sure our son felt safe and secure in his own home.

The tension had been building for days by the time we both just completely lost it, neither of us monitoring our language or our voices at all.

It started when Jake and Claire came to visit on Sunday afternoon. While Charlie was showing Claire his bedroom, Jake sat with us to talk.

"I'm glad that you're feeling better, Bells," he said, taking a swig of beer. "I've been keeping Riley up to date. He's nothing if he ain't persistent," he chuckled.

"What?" Bella said, scrunching up her face in confusion.

I sucked in air through my teeth. I hadn't told her about Riley. . . or his new girlfriend. I was about to get into trouble.

"You didn't tell her?" Jake grimaced.

"Tell me what? Edward?"

I sighed. "I forgot. I've had other things on my mind."

"Tell me what?"

I sighed. "Riley came by the hospital last weekend. He heard about what happened and he wanted to check in. You weren't awake yet and you were still in ICU. Only your dad and I were allowed in."

Jake cleared his throat uncomfortably. Bella looked at him and then back to me expectantly. She knew there was something that I was leaving out.

"He has a girlfriend. She said she was his sister's best friend."

"Lizzie?" Bella squeaked, her eyebrows nearly hitting her hairline.

"Uh, yeah, I think so."

"Holy shit," she breathed. "She's had a crush on him for ages, but she was only fifteen. I can't believe she's even old enough."

I wasn't sure what to make of her reaction. Her hand was on her neck and she was frowning. So of course, in typically Edward Cullen fashion, I over-reacted.

"Jesus Christ, Bella. He's allowed to have a fucking girlfriend."

Bella looked at me incredulously. Jake's mouth was hanging open.

"Uh, I'm gonna go see what Charlie and Claire are up to," he said, quickly excusing himself.

Bella still hadn't responded to me.

"Fuck, you swore to me that you didn't have those kinds of feelings for him."

"I don't," she snapped.

"Obviously you do or you wouldn't be reacting like this. Stop holding onto the man and let him move on with his life."

I saw Bella's jaw clench and her head tilt like she was trying to gain her composure.

"I. . . was not upset by it, Edward," she grit out. "I'm surprised, yes, but I'm happy for Riley. And I'm happy for Lizzie."

"Then what's with the fucking frown?"

"I was thinking about Ginger," she spit. "She's never liked the fact that Lizzie had a crush on Riley."

_Shit._

I took a moment to calm myself down, rubbing my hand over my face.

"I thought. . ."

"I get it," she said shortly. "Just. . .let's forget about it, okay?"

The next few days were the same. We tip-toed around each other, but little things were agitating. And when she refused to listen to why I didn't want her to go to James' hearing, I got pissed and started yelling, forgetting that we weren't the only people in the apartment.

It was Bella who caught him. Her eyes widened and her face crumpled as she stared beyond me. I turned to see Charlie, apparently awakened from sleeping in our bed by our yelling. His eyes were glassy, his face unsure. One hand hung limply by his side, holding onto his blankie, while the other clutched Ruffy to his chest.

I looked over at the baby monitor and then back to Charlie. It had been on and probably would have alerted us to the fact that he was awake if we hadn't been so completely carried away with our argument.

Bella's eyes met mine only briefly before she pushed passed me. "Charlie, you're supposed to be in bed, honey," she cooed at him.

I rubbed my eyes roughly and approached them.

"I couldn't sweep," Charlie whimpered, his eyes darting between me and Bella.

Neither of us had to ask why. We knew. I felt horrible. It's not like he'd never heard us fight before, but nothing like this.

"I'm sorry, baby," Bella said lifting him into her arms. He laid his head down on her shoulder, burying his face in the crook of her neck. His eyes closed and I saw a tear trickle from the corner and slide down his nose.

_Fuck._

I watched from the doorway as Bella set him back down in our bed.

"Was you and Daddy fighting?" he asked as she ran her hand through his hair.

"Daddy and Mommy were having a really loud talk, baby. I'm sorry we woke you up."

"Is Daddy mad?"

"Daddy's okay," she whispered.

"Are you mad?"

"I'm okay too," she smiled, leaning down to kiss him.

Charlie bit his lip, looking at her and then at me. I smiled warmly at him, letting him know that I, indeed, was okay. I understood why Bella didn't really answer his question. We had both been mad, but there was no reason for him to know that.

I walked up behind Bella and kissed her temple softly.

"We'll be in to cuddle in a little bit, buddy," I assured as I walked backwards out into the hallway.

"Nigh night, Daddy," he called as he turned over and buried his face in the pillow.

I watched as Bella said her goodnight and came out of the room. She shut the door and was immediately in my arms. Her face rested against my chest and her arms snaked around my waist, grasping the fabric of my shirt.

I could tell her shoulder was still bothering her by the way she favored it; gripping me much tighter with her left arm. I held her to me, kissing the top of her head.

"I'm sorry," she said, her voice thick with emotion.

"Me too," I sighed heavily.

She slowly let go of me and I followed her back out into the living room. We sat on the sofa facing each other. Bella held my hand, tracing the lines in them delicately.

"I haven't heard you play the piano in a long time," she said softly.

"I play all the time. I play every time I give Charlie a lesson."

"No, I don't mean that kind of playing. I mean the kind of playing where I can feel your soul."

"Oh." I nodded, because she was right. It had been awhile since I'd actually sat down and played out my emotions.

We sat, silently for several minutes. Bella continued her ministrations, while I watched her.

"I want to go," she said, finally breaking from the trance she had been in and, in turn, breaking me from mine.

"I know you do," I answered.

"You'll be there to protect me from him."

"Yes, I will."

And that was the end of the discussion. I pulled her hand towards my face and kissed the inside of her wrist. Her hand slid down my jaw and cupped my face. I hated fighting with her.

I leaned forward, encouraging her to lie back on the sofa, and crawled over her, cradling her head in my hands.

"Are you feeling okay?" I whispered.

She nodded and licked her lips. The sight of her tongue darting out made my dick twitch. I had gone back to work part-time and although I had been home since early afternoon, I was still in my scrubs. Needless to say, Bella felt my growing predicament.

I stared into her eyes, silently asking her if she was ready. She smiled up at me and lifted her head to meet my lips. Part of me was still slightly hesitant, but we both needed to feel the connection; the one we'd spent so much time building in the first place.

I was resting between her legs, my erection pressed firmly against her in all the right spots. I rocked forward a few times, loving the tiny whimpers and moans she expressed.

It wasn't time for dirty talk. Although I certainly loved it when she said things she knew would get me going, this time we didn't need words. I disentangled my tongue from hers just long enough to pull my shirt over my head. Bella left her tank top on, just in case we were interrupted, but I was easily able to manipulate it to lavish some affection on her gorgeous nipples. I worked my mouth over her chin and down her throat, loving how her skin was turning a slight shade of pink from my scruff.

As I rolled my tongue over her left nipple she arched her back slightly. At first I thought it was simply in response to what I was doing, but then I felt her legs wrap around my back. Her toes dug into the waistband of my pants and boxers, trying to push them down.

She got them just far enough to let my aching dick spring free before she gave up with a huff, returning her legs to the position they had been in before.

I chuckled a little bit and then leaned back, quickly removing them the rest of the way, before slipping off her sleep shorts, leaving her bare as well.

When I was back over her, my cock in place and ready to go, I waited. She blinked slowly and bit her lip, before nodding her head.

I pushed my hips forward, finally entering her slick warmth. Her breath hitched and her mouth fell open as I slid all the way into her. She felt so good; so warm. I didn't want to move. Well, I did, but I knew that the moment I started, I wouldn't be able to stop and then it would be over. And it felt too fucking good to ever be over.

After about a minute of me not moving, I felt Bella pressing herself up towards me.

"Edward?" she called out quietly. There was concern in her voice that shook me from my daze.

I swallowed thickly and let out a breath.

I was resting myself on my forearms and I shifted my weight onto my left arm so that I could thread my fingers with her before settling back down. I didn't want to put her injured shoulder in an uncomfortable position so I left it where she had it, pressed against her side.

I slid myself out and then back; slowly, almost painfully. Usually, when I was in this position, I felt the urge to go fast; to fuck her; to claim her. But, not now. That's not what this was about. This was about reminding us who we were and what we meant to each other; and how all the hurt and anger had absolutely nothing on the love we shared or our commitment to each other.

I could see and feel Bella about to come undone. Her eyes started to roll backwards and she gripped my hand as though it were her lifeline. I crashed my mouth down onto hers just as she lost it, her body trembling beneath me as I sped up just enough to join her.

I was suddenly aware of how fucking tired I was. As if the last bit of energy I possessed that evening had just emptied itself from my body along with my orgasm. I couldn't just collapse on her as I had so many times before, so instead I just stayed where I was, transferring most of my weight to my knees.

Bella was breathing deeply, her eyes closed. I briefly wondered if she had fallen asleep with me still semi-hard inside of her, but then her lips twitched and she smiled.

"Thank you," she whispered sweetly.

"You're welcome," I smiled, kissing her chastely on her soft, pink lips.

I helped Bella get her shorts back on and then slipped back into mine long enough to escort her to our bedroom. I didn't want to sleep in my scrubs, because that was just gross considering the things I had to deal with at the clinic. While Bella cleaned herself up, I changed into some flannel sleep pants and then we both climbed into bed with Charlie.

"Do you think he's ever going to feel comfortable to sleep in his own bed again?" I whispered over him, stroking his face gently and watching his eyelashes flutter.

"Yes. I think he will. I think we should have him talk to that therapist though."

"But child psychology is what you want to do. Aren't there things we can do at home to help him?"

She snorted. "All my knowledge is basic, Edward. Plus, it all goes down the toilet the minute you're talking about your own child. I'm too emotionally invested. It's kind of like how they don't let doctors treat their own family members in cases of emergency."

I nodded. That was certainly something I could understand. She was good at putting things into perspective for me.

"So you want to call her tomorrow, then?" I asked.

"Yeah." Bella yawned. "First thing."

She reached over and grabbed my hand, letting them rest gently on Charlie's hip before I fell into a somewhat more relaxed sleep.

XXXXX

James' sentencing was much faster than either Bella or I expected. It was set for two o'clock on Friday afternoon, so we had Mom drop us off before picking Charlie up from school and taking him home.

We met up with Cameron and went inside. It was easier having him there to explain things in terms that we could understand. He also acted as a bodyguard of sorts against the press when it came to questions regarding the case.

We sat down in the courtroom and waited. James was brought in, the shackles linking his ankles rattling loudly. They uncuffed his wrists and he sat down without looking at anyone. There was no one on his side anyway and I doubt he wanted to see us.

Chief Swan was right. Even a week later, he was pretty messed up. If I had to guess, his beat down after his reaction to finding out about Irina had not been his last. There was yellowish green bruising around his chin and his eye, but he also had a relatively fresh cut lip and a split forehead that looked like it was stitched. It also looked like the drug withdrawals had taken a toll on his body. I was well aware of the fact that the prison system was rife with drugs, but my guess was that James hadn't earned his access to them yet. Plus, he was being monitored much more carefully since he was still on suicide watch.

I tried not to be happy at the fact that he was getting his in prison, but I couldn't help it. In my eyes, there would never be punishment enough for what he tried to do to my family.

About ten minutes later, we stood as the judge entered the room and then told us to sit.

There were a few formalities and procedures done and then the judge asked James if there was anything that he wanted to say before he rendered his decision. He shook his head and kept his eyes trained on the desk in front of him.

Bella sat stiffly at my side, biting frantically at her fingernail, her knee bouncing up and down.

The judge cleared his throat and James' attorney whispered something in his ear. James looked up towards the bench.

"James Steven Hunter. It is my understanding that you have accepted a plea bargain in return for your testimony against Tanya Lee Denali, is that correct?"

"Yes, your honor," James said clearly, but quietly.

"And do you understand that your sentencing is contingent upon that testimony?"

"Yes, your honor," he repeated.

"Okay. Mr. Hunter, you have pled guilty to the charge of kidnapping in the first degree. For that charge, you will serve no less than thirty years at the Monroe Correctional Complex."

There was no emotion on James' face to indicate that this was a surprise to him.

The judge continued.

"You have also pled guilty to the charge of conspiracy to commit murder. For that charge, you are sentenced to twenty-five years at the Monroe Correctional Complex serving no less than eight years. Your sentences will be served consecutively. Should there be a change in the terms of the plea bargain, this court will reconvene to assess the appropriateness of the sentence."

The judge glanced at both the DA and the defense attorney. "Is there anything further to be discussed in this case?"

"No your honor," they said in unison.

"So be it. This court is dismissed."

Everyone stood up, including me, but Bella stayed frozen. I reached for her only to realize that she was staring directly at James, who was now facing us, his arms being cuffed behind his back. He appeared to be staring right back, but his eyes were dull, lifeless; like he had completely checked out and was just going through the motions.

"Baby, let's go," I said, slipping my fingers around her upper arm and tugging upwards a little.

She waited until James was being led out to stand up.

"Are you okay?" I asked wiping away the wet stains under her eyes and down her cheeks.

"Yeah, I'm glad this part is over," she nodded, leaning into me for a hug. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"Me too, baby," I smiled. "One down, one to go."

"Your brother is waiting out the side door so that you can avoid the press," Cameron said with his hand on my back. "I'll field the questions for you. You guys just head out."

"Thanks, Cam." I shook his hand and led Bella to where Emmett was waiting in my car. He had taken the day off of work to help us out.

"How'd it go?" he asked as I opened the passenger door. I motioned for Bella to get in and then climbed into the back.

"Fifty-five years. He'll be eligible for parole in thirty-eight," I supplied.

Emmett pulled away from the courthouse. "Hmmm, I have no idea if that's a good sentence or not," he said, shaking his head.

"He got leniency for pleading guilty and agreeing to testify against Tanya," I explained. "I think it's the best sentence we could have expected. Cam seemed pleased with it."

"Does Cam think Tanya will get something similar?"

I shrugged, noticing that Bella was resting her head against the window. She had sunglasses on, but since I was sitting behind Emmett, I could see that her eyes were closed.

"If she's found guilty, he thinks she should get more time, but who knows. The legal system can be completely screwed up."

The car was quiet for a few minutes, save for whatever Em had playing on his iPod, which was some weird meditation music.

"Emmett, what the hell are we listening to?" I finally asked.

"Oh, it's _Soothing Sounds for Your Growing Baby_," he grinned at me in the rear view mirror. "Rose bought it. She says that it's supposed to help the baby's brain development and also make it relax and be a good sleeper. I thought that maybe it would make you guys feel better too."

I heard Bella snort and start laughing. I smiled. She was genuinely amused.

"What?" Emmett asked. "It's working, you were practically asleep."

Bella lifted her head and laughed even harder. "Thanks, Em. I appreciate it," she said, wiping her eyes under her sunglasses.

The rest of the trip was fairly peaceful. We didn't talk about James or the sentence.

When we got back home around four, Mom and Rose were in the kitchen with Charlie. Rose had a half day of work and Emmett had dropped her off at the house before coming to pick us up. We were having a big family dinner that night. No one was calling it a celebratory dinner, but that's exactly what it was.

My mom was kneading dough and Rose was letting Charlie lick peanut butter from a spoon when we walked in.

"Hey," Mom smiled tentatively.

"Hi," Bella and I said in unison.

Mom wiped her hands on a kitchen towel and curled her fingers at us, asking us to follow her.

"I'll go," I said to Bella, leaving her in the kitchen with Charlie.

"Well? How did it go?" Mom asked once we were out of earshot.

"Thirty years without parole on kidnapping, twenty-five on the conspiracy charges, but he'll be eligible for parole eight years into that sentence," I sniffed.

"Well, that's good, right? I mean, he's going to testify against Tanya so that has to mean that she'll get longer than him."

I just kind of nodded and pursed my lips.

Mom got the idea. She stood in front of me and straightened the collar of my dress shirt.

"I'm proud of you, honey," she smiled softly.

"Why?" I asked raising my eyebrow.

"Because you're doing so well holding together your family; being there for them."

"I'm not so sure about that. Bella and I got into a huge fight the other night. Charlie heard us." I turned my head, embarrassed that I was admitting this to my mom. "He's already having so many other issues and then he has to overhear us screaming at each other."

My mom sighed and placed her hands flat against my chest.

"Sweetheart, kids all around the world hear their parents argue and fight every once in a while. The important part is that you show him that you still love each other and that you love him no matter what. Did you talk to the therapist?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Yes. We're going to take Charlie into her office after school on Monday. She said she was contacted by the judge and wants to talk to us about something."

Mom furrowed her brow. "Do you know what?"

"No," I answered. "I have no idea."

"Well, whatever it is, I think it will be good for him to see her. He hasn't really talked about anything, has he?"

"No. I honestly don't know what to think. According to Detective Laurent, Tanya's insisting that she didn't do anything other than try to assure him that she would find me. But he's refusing to sleep by himself and he's afraid to go anywhere by himself. She's full of so much shit about everything, Mom, but for Charlie's sake, I kind of want to believe her."

"Is he still wetting the bed?" She asked sadly.

"No, not really. He wakes up dry most mornings. We haven't talked to him about getting rid of the pull-ups again though. Bella says she thinks it's too soon. She thinks he'll tell us when he's ready to give them up again. She wants it to be something that is his choice."

"I think that's probably a good idea," Mom agreed. "At his age, there are very few things that he has control over. By letting him decide when he's ready, you're actually helping him work through this whole experience."

I stared at my mother.

"Dr. Phil," she laughed. "He had this whole episode on behavioral issues of toddlers."

"Oh."

_Of course. Dr. Phil; knower of all things._

My mom hugged me tightly and we made our way back into the kitchen. Bella and I helped Mom finish up with dinner while Rose and Emmett took Charlie outside to play. The evening was dry, but chilly, so they bundled him up and let him loose on the play set.

The entire family, including Chief Swan and surprisingly, Mrs. Jane, joined us a couple hours later.

"Sweet boy," she cooed, holding my face in her worn, wrinkled hands and looking up at me. "I'm sorry you and your family are going through such a time."

I didn't really respond. I didn't need to. I'm sure she could read the emotion in my expression.

"Have you asked her to marry you yet?" she whispered, her eyes dancing around like she was on some undercover mission.

I laughed. "Not yet, Mrs. Jane."

"Well, why not?" she frowned.

"I want this all to be over with first," I sighed. "Plus, I have a plan and it's going to take some time."

"How much time?"

"A few months," I snorted. "Why are you so eager?"

"Because I want more of those," she said pointing at Charlie who was watching television across the room. "I want to see more beautiful, Edward and Isabella Cullen babies."

"Well we obviously don't have to be married for that," I teased, knowing that she was going to glare at me, which she did.

"You do right by that girl, Edward," she scolded and then winked.

"I might need your help," I smirked.

"Really?"

I nodded.

"Anything, my boy. You ask and I shall make it happen."

"That's what I'm counting on," I grinned.

By the time dinner was served, Bella and I were tipsy enough to be groping each other under the table. Alice, who was sitting across from me, cleared her throat and widened her eyes at me more than once, but I completely ignored her. We weren't doing anything inappropriate; not really. I just wanted to see how high up under her skirt I could get my hand before she slapped it away or clenched her legs together. I continued to engage in conversation the entire time and I'm pretty sure no one noticed, other than Alice and maybe Jasper, considering he couldn't stop laughing.

When I actually cupped her over her underwear during dessert, she'd apparently had enough. She reached over and gave my dick an unexpected squeeze making me jump and hit my knees against the table.

"Uh. . . Alice kicked me," I stuttered, clearing my throat.

"I did not," Alice scoffed before giving me a wicked smirk and then nailing me right in the knee. I jumped again and winced. The woman had those pointy toed boots on and that kick fucking hurt.

"Alice, stop kicking your brother," Carlisle said, pretending to be completely serious.

"Hey, maybe you should tell them to stop...OUCH!"

I smiled innocently at her.

"Enough you two," Mom scowled, sending me a very pointed look.

_Whoops, maybe I wasn't as discrete as I thought._

"Do you want us to keep Charlie tonight?" My mom asks as we're cleaning up the dishes.

I looked over and saw my son cuddling up into Bella's lap on the sofa. His eyes kept doing that trying to close thing, but popping back open when he realized what was happening.

"I don't know, Mom. I don't think he's ready."

"I'll sleep with him. He'll be okay. I think that you and Bella need a little grown up time."

I wrinkled my nose at her. My mom was actually encouraging me to go and ravish my girlfriend.

"I'm not naive, sweetheart. Trust me, I've been there."

"Gross," I laughed.

She pushed me sideways. "Take it or leave it," she sang.

I looked back over at Bella. Her face was slightly flushed from the wine she had been drinking. Her hair was cascading over her shoulders and she was laughing at something Emmett was saying.

"I'll take it," I said quickly. "But if he wakes up. . ."

"I'll call you if we have any problems. You live over the garage, Edward." She snorted and then ducked her head and covered her mouth, embarrassed at the sound.

We said goodnight to everyone, and I quietly assured Mrs. Jane that I would call her to fill her in on what I was up to. I think the chief was trying not to think about why his daughter and I were leaving so early and so anxiously without our child in tow. I nodded to him politely as I ushered Bella out the door.

God damn was I happy that I took my mom up on that offer. Bella was wild and mischievous. We played with each other's bodies for an entire hour; teasing and tasting, before she fell into my arms, letting me consume her entirely. The alcohol we had had earlier was enough to allow us to forget about all the shit that was going on and just let loose a little.

We couldn't get enough of each other.

At three in the morning, when I woke to my blissfully naked girl with her back tucked up against my chest, I had to have her again. I rolled her over and took her slowly, passionately. Showing her just how much I had missed her.

We didn't wake on Saturday morning until almost ten. I was fast asleep when Bella startled and shot out of bed like she'd been electrocuted.

"Shit, baby, what's the matter?" I asked, running my hand through my hair.

"Charlie?" she whimpered.

"He's fine. He's with my parents. Were you really drunk last night?" I asked, suddenly feeling guilty. I hadn't thought that she was, but if she couldn't remember things. . .

"No," she said, blowing out a puff of air. "I wasn't. I just forgot. I woke up and he wasn't there and he's always there. I just got freaked out. Sorry."

"Come back to bed," I groaned.

"Have you not had enough?" she teased.

"I'll never have enough. But right now, I just want to hold you."

_God, I sound like a girl._

It's not that I didn't want to have sex again. My morning wood was enough to tell me that I did, but she had jumped out of bed so fast, I didn't even get a boob grope in.

"Good, cause my girly bits are a little raw this morning," she giggled.

_So much for wake-up sex._

She climbed back into bed with me and I wrapped my arms around her, just feeling her silky skin and soft body against mine. I let my fingers caress the skin below her belly button, feeling the faint scars from her pregnancy with Charlie.

"When were you going to tell me?" she said suddenly.

"When was I going to tell you what?" I asked, kissing her neck.

"I've been waiting all week."

"Baby," I sighed. "You just need to come out and ask me cause I have no idea what you're talking about."

"I saw the rest of your acceptance letters," she said quietly. "You left them on the counter and then just put them away."

"Oh. We've had a lot on our minds this week. I didn't want to add any stress," I said weakly.

It was honestly the truth, but I knew that she wouldn't be happy about it.

"You got accepted to all of them?"

"Yeah," I nodded against her back.

"So where are we going?"

"I don't want to talk about this while we're naked in bed, Bella," I grumbled. "Let's lie here for a while and then get up and have coffee and breakfast. Then, we can sit down and figure it out, okay?"

"Okay," she agreed flipping herself over and kissing my chest.

We stayed there for another half hour before we finally got up. Bella called over to my parents' house to check in. Charlie had apparently done fairly well. He actually slept between my parents in their bed and only woke once with a slight panic attack, but they were able to soothe him back to sleep and he didn't wake again until seven. And he was dry.

My mom readily agreed to hold onto him for the next couple of hours while Bella and I made lists. Four schools; four lists. Pros and cons of each one. Since I had never accepted an invitation to interview at Johns Hopkins, that one was off the table.

I honestly wished I had applied to some west coast schools other than UW. I wasn't completely opposed to UW. It had several things going for it. Number one being that our family was so close.

How could we leave them after all the support they'd given us?

"They'll support us wherever we go," Bella reasoned.

"You don't want to leave," I stated.

"I didn't, no."

"What's changed?"

She stared at me. "Haven't you ever just wanted to get away from it all? Make a fresh start somewhere where people don't know you?"

That was exactly how I had felt the day I left Forks. Of course, I obviously didn't do a very good job with the fresh start part, but not because I didn't want to, more because I didn't know how. And by keeping Tanya in my life, I never really had a chance anyway.

"I know that Seattle is a big place, Edward. But it's familiar to me. Everywhere I go there are memories. I don't want to be surrounded by those right now. I want to make new memories with you and Charlie."

"See, this is why I didn't want to talk about this right now," I breathed. "How can we make a rational decision when we're dealing with this James and Tanya thing?"

"This isn't about that," she protested.

I raised my eyebrow at her.

"Okay, it's not entirely about that," she acquiesced. "Edward, this is not an emotion based decision. I've been thinking about it since you told me you wanted to go. Why are you changing your mind?"

"I'm not. I just. . . I don't know. What will we do without my mom to babysit Charlie so we can have loud raunchy sex all over the apartment?"

Bella laughed. I smiled, but I was serious.

"It's not like that's a weekly occurrence, Edward. Your parents will visit. We'll come back all the time. Hell, we can come back for every single summer and live in this apartment until it's time to go back for school. We can come home for Christmas. And when we're done with school, we can come back for good."

"What if we want to go out?"

"We'll figure it out, Edward. Millions of parents all over the world have the same dilemma and they seem to make it work."

I looked down at the lists in front of me. They were all pretty evenly matched, but one in particular stood out. I let my finger drop to the page.

"This one?"

Bella looked down and grinned. "That one."

"Okay."

She jumped into my lap, straddling me and peppering my face with kisses.

"Baby, if you keep doing that, we're gonna have to call my mom and tell her that we'll be another few hours," I joked.

She hummed, but slowed her attack until she finally placed one last kiss on my mouth.

"When do you want to tell them?" she asked as we pulled on our shoes and coats.

"I think it's just best to get it out of the way; give them time to adjust," I answered. "But should we talk to Charlie about it?"

"I don't think he'll understand. I don't want to make him any more anxious right now than he already is. We'll work our way up to that. He'll be okay. We'll make it an adventure for him."

XXXXX

We didn't tell our family for another week. For several reasons. One, we wanted to make sure that we were firm on our decision. Two, we got a little distracted by our discussion with Leslie Ripley.

On Monday afternoon, we met with her at her office, which was actually really cool. She had an entire room filled with toys. Behind a two-way mirror was an observation room, kind of like there was at the police station. It took us about twenty minutes to extract Charlie from Bella's leg, but eventually he agreed to enter the room with Leslie's assistant.

We watched from the observation room.

"So, I wanted to talk to you both, because I got a call from the judge last week regarding Charlie's testimony in the Denali case."

Bella nodded, not taking her eyes of Charlie.

"He asked me the best way to go about questioning Charlie about what happened without causing any emotional trauma."

I was waiting for what exactly she needed to discuss with us.

"I expressed to him my concern that Charlie wouldn't be able to accurately recall what happened to him two months from now. To make a long story short, it's been approved by the court system to use my recorded therapy sessions with Charlie in place of physical testimony."

Bella's head snapped towards Leslie. "Really? So he wouldn't have to testify at all?"

Leslie shook her head. "No. The court will be able to watch my sessions with him."

"What happens if he doesn't say anything?" I asked.

"If he doesn't reveal anything to me, there's no way that he's going to reveal anything to the court during the trial. The DA can decide whether to use the testimony or not."

"So what do you need from us?" Bella asked, her spirits slightly higher.

"Technically nothing," Leslie wrinkled her nose. "The courts have requested it so we have to do it, but I just wanted to run it by you. There are several benefits to it though. It'll be less traumatic for him, he'll get the therapy that he needs to process it and because it's being requested by the court, they'll pay for it."

Bella and I agreed readily. Anything to keep Charlie from having to be anywhere near the courthouse or Tanya.

The last reason that we waited to tell our families was actually really unexpected. A slight drama occurred when Bella's mom, Renee, called the chief and royally bitched him out for not telling her that her daughter and grandson had been abducted by some psychopath.

Apparently, a friend of hers in Spokane had seen the story on the news and e-mailed her to check in.

His reaction was to call her out on the fact that not only had she pretty much ignored Bella for ten years, but she hadn't even bothered to meet her grandson. He said that if she cared so much about them, she wouldn't have had to rely on a friend to find out the information. He proceeded to tell her that if Bella decided that she wanted her in our lives, she'd call. And then he hung up on her.

Bella wasn't interested. Her mother had never shown any sign that she wanted a relationship with either her or Charlie, so she was cutting her losses.

It made me sad. To think that I had such a wonderful mother in my life and I shut her out for so long; took advantage of how much she loved me, when Bella's mother seemed to have completely washed her hands of motherhood altogether.

Bella told me not to worry about it. She wasn't.

It was Valentine's Day when we finally broke the news to them. I had formally accepted the offer of admission to the school that we had chosen and declined the other offers.

Mom cried.

"Esme, we're going to be back all the time, you know that. And you can come visit whenever you want," Bella said, trying to comfort her.

"Oh, I know that," she sniffed, wiping her eyes with a napkin. "They're happy tears, I promise."

I looked at her skeptically.

"Don't look at me like that, Edward Anthony. Of course, I'm sad that you'll be leaving and taking my grand. . . grandbaby away, but I'm happy for you too," she hiccoughed.

Carlisle's arms were wrapped around her and he kissed her neck, before smiling up at us.

"I think it will be good for you," he said quietly.

Chief Swan's reaction was mixed. He was supportive in front of Bella, telling her that he was proud of her for making a decision that would be good for her career path. When she walked away, he grabbed my arm.

"Was this your decision?" he asked suspiciously.

"Not really," I answered honestly. "Before all this crap happened, I told her I wanted to go, but she wasn't sure. But when we talked about it this last time, it was the other way around. In the end, we weighed the pros and cons of each school and made the decision together."

He narrowed his eyes. "Really?" he asked, genuinely surprised.

"Really," I chuckled lightly.

"I thought you were going to ask her to marry you."

"I am, chief," I assured. "I'm in the planning stage. I'll eventually need your help, but until I can get it all figured out, I'm keeping that plan to myself. . . and Alice."

"You need Alice to help you ask my daughter to marry you?" He was looking at me like I was an idiot.

"Just. . .give me a couple of months, okay?"

"Months?"

"Yes, months."

He shook his head and handed me a beer. "Here's to a few months," he said, his mustache twitching.

Over the next week we told the rest of our family as well as Jake, Mrs. Jane, and a couple of other people, that we were heading east.

The reaction was, of course, mixed. But it wasn't anything that we weren't expecting.

Over the next two months, our lives slowly went back to normal. Bella and I started taking Charlie to therapy sessions with Leslie on Monday's and Friday's.

He was hesitant to talk about anything at first, but Leslie was good at what she did. The first week was spent gaining his trust; playing with him and discussing his likes and dislikes, his family, his school. The second week was when she really started getting answers. She started out on Monday talking about his favorite movies. She transitioned into Finding Nemo and then slyly brought up the issue of getting lost.

"Have you ever gotten lost, Charlie?" she asked.

Charlie nodded.

"What can you tell me about that?"

He shrugged and I was worried that this would be the same as at the hospital when Leslie first talked to him.

"Dat wady took me," he said softly.

"Someone took you?" Leslie repeated. "Can we talk about that?"

He nodded.

"Did you get lost and she found you?"

"No. I was waiting for Mommy."

"What was Mommy doing?"

"She was wooking at a box."

"Oh, and you were waiting for her to look at the box?"

"Uh huh."

"Did Mommy walk away from you?"

I heard Bella scoff defensively at that question.

"No. Da wady picked me up and walked away."

"Did you know the lady that picked you up?"

Charlie nodded and then shook his head.

"Did you try to tell your mommy that the lady was taking you away?"

"She put her hand wike dis," Charlie said, covering his mouth with his hand.

How the fuck did no one notice a woman silencing a child like that? It wasn't suspicious? At all?

"That must have been scary. Had you seen the lady before?"

"Uh huh."

"Where did you see her?"

"She said mommy was my nanny at da store."

"Can you draw me a picture of the lady?"

Charlie spent the next few minutes drawing a very crude picture of a woman with blond hair. I had to wonder how in the hell that was going to help, but then Leslie brought a poster board with the pictures of six women on it. All of them were blond, but not the same shade. Their faces were different shapes. Tanya's picture was in the middle on the bottom, but there was also a picture of the mother of one of his classmates on there.

I was confused.

"Do you see the lady that picked you up and took you away from your mommy on this board, Charlie?"

Charlie's eyes scanned over the pictures. You could see the moment he recognized Tanya's face. He nodded and pointed at her.

"This is the lady that took you away from your mommy at the music festival?" Leslie repeated, pointing at the picture of Tanya.

Charlie nodded and then looked down at his picture. He picked up a dark crayon and scribbled over his drawing.

"Does that lady make you mad?" Leslie asked, setting the board down.

He nodded and continued scribbling.

"Why does she make you mad, Charlie?"

"She said my Mommy was wost and she'd not come back," he said quietly.

"Oh, so you thought your mommy wasn't going to come back?" Leslie glanced up at the window that we were standing behind but then returned her focus to Charlie.

Over the next fifteen minutes Leslie and Charlie talked more about his time with Tanya, including where she took him. She had apparently put him in the backseat and made him sit on the floor with the toys. She didn't talk to him much, but yelled at him to "shut-up or I won't take you back to your Daddy" when he started crying. Most of everything else was exactly what I had heard at the hospital, but Bella hadn't heard any of it.

She was visibly shaking by the time they were finished.

I wrapped her up in my arms as we watched Leslie take Charlie back to a safe place. Instead they talked about his new love. Spiderman.

When they were done, she came back in to what she called "process with us".

"I had him draw the picture of the woman who took him first so that he was already thinking about what she looked like in his mind. Kids' memories are actually much better than we think when it comes to photographic recall, but they get confused easily and they lack the cognitive skills to communicate the details. So by the time I brought out the photo board, he already had her picture in his head."

"Why was there a picture of his school friend's mom?" I asked. "She's not a criminal is she?"

Leslie laughed. "No. She's actually a friend of mine. I put that in there because she matches the physical description and she is someone that he sees and is familiar with, but doesn't really know. I wanted to eliminate the defense's argument that he could simply be pointing out the one person that he recognized."

"Is this everything then?" Bella asked. "Did you get everything you needed?"

"I'd like to continue seeing him for maybe another three or four sessions just to make sure. I'll continue to record the sessions and then I'll hand them over to the defense. I'm going to be called as an expert witness so I'll give my opinion."

She hesitated for a moment and then continued. "Are you two seeing someone?"

Bella shook her head.

"May I make a recommendation? I think it would be good for you to go through your experience as well. I have the name of a wonderful woman who does individual and couples therapy."

Bella accepted the card and we thanked Leslie before taking Charlie home. She was on the phone to the therapist Leslie recommended within hours.

In the weeks leading up to the trial, Bella and I began seeing Sarah. Bella met with her once a week individually and once a week with me.

I don't know what she talked about in her own sessions, but in our joint sessions we talked more about our history.

Sarah was actually quite impressed that we'd worked through a lot of our issues and had built a solid base for our relationship. There were still a few things, but it had to do with our own guilt.

Bella, in particular, was having issues with Rose's pregnancy. Not with the pregnancy itself, she was extremely happy for them; however, whenever they discussed the baby, she was reminded that she had left me out of experiencing her pregnancy with Charlie.

I can't say that it never bothered me, because it did. Emmett, in his excitement, had called me up and told me all about feeling the baby move for the first time. I congratulated him and laughed at his comparison to the Alien movie and then spent the next two days being a moody bastard.

Sarah told us that we had to accept the emotions that would come along with those things; to let them come and then move past them. Holding them in would only prevent us from healing. It was like a wound. If we acknowledged and accepted that it was there and just made sure that we took care of it in a healthy manner, it would heal. There might be scars, but given time, those scars would become a symbol of what we had overcome.

Sarah was a very smart woman.

April eleventh came quickly. Bella and I were staying at a hotel in Seattle for the week. Luckily, Charlie was no longer having separation anxiety issues. He had been sleeping in his own bed almost every night for about three weeks, so we felt comfortable leaving him with my parents.

Tanya's trial started and I was sequestered because I was testifying. Chief Swan sat with Bella during the opening statements and the first day of testimony, before heading back home to Forks. Cameron sat with her during my testimony. Luckily I was scheduled to testify first thing on Tuesday morning, before James, so once I was finished I would be able to sit with her.

Tanya looked horrible. She looked tired and too thin. She was wearing virtually no make-up. Her hair was limp and she was dressed in this ugly flowery dress.

My testimony was pretty basic. The Seattle DA, Roger Howard, had prepared me and I was more than ready.

I explained that Tanya and I had always had a very turbulent relationship and about my suspicion that she and James had been having an affair. I also told them about the incidents of vandalism to Alice's and my apartment in Boston as well as the condom hole punching.

Of course, the defense ripped me apart. Digging into my many, many affairs. Including the incident with Bella. I don't know how he found out some of that information, but he made it sound like I was a perpetually violent person. Then Mr. Howard requested a redirect examination and asked me to describe my current relationship with Bella and with Charlie.

I made eye contact with Bella when I was talking. She smiled and bit her lip, which made me smile. I could see the jury looking back and forth between us out of the corner of my eye. If my love for Bella and our son wasn't evident in what they saw, they were hopeless.

Jessica testified next, followed by James. James' testimony was the most damning if they were taking into consideration just what he was saying, but the fact that he had accepted a plea deal tainted him. At least, in my eyes it did. I didn't know about the jury.

"Mr. Hunter, you admitted to breaking into Edward Cullen's car and taking his son's car seat. What was the purpose of you having that car seat?"

"When Tanya first talked about it, she asked me to get rid of both Bella and her kid. But I was supposed to take them out of the state first so that it would be harder to find them. She said I needed a car seat so that I didn't get stopped by the cops before I could get lost."

"But then the plan changed?"

"Yeah, she decided that the kid could help her get back in with the family; that if she could take the place of his mom, then Edward would have to fall in love with her again."

There were a few hushed whispers and clearing throats in the courtroom, including Bella, who appeared as though she was going to be sick. She was slightly bent over, her hands over her mouth. I wanted to pull her into my lap, but I settled for rubbing her back as comfortingly as I could.

The defense tried to discredit him. Tried to make it look like it was all his idea, but James held his own. He admitted his role in the scheme but insisted that Tanya was the mastermind. If I didn't hate the guy so much for what he did to Bella, I would have been cheering him on.

It was Charlie's recorded sessions with Leslie that hit the mark. They were shown while Leslie was testifying and she was able to explain what she was doing and why she asked certain questions at certain times. By the end of the testimony, half of the jurors were crying and the other half looked just plain pissed.

I kept looking over at Tanya and her attorney during the viewing. The attorney was whispering in her ear and she kept shaking her head furiously. He huffed loudly and looked frustrated.

Her parents were sitting behind her, their heads slightly bowed. I couldn't help but feel bad for them. People had not been kind. The Forks rumor mill was saying that they had to disconnect their home phone because they were getting nasty phone calls and even death threats. I didn't blame them. They weren't the perfect parents, but they couldn't have anticipated that their daughter would do something like this.

By Wednesday evening, the prosecution was able to rest their case.

The defense took the stand beginning on Thursday. They had a couple of character witnesses who stated that Tanya was too loving of a person to be behind anything so heartless.

_Bullshit._

If I didn't think I'd get kicked out of the courtroom I would have shouted it out loud. Bella gritted her teeth and I'm pretty sure she was thinking the same thing.

By that afternoon, Tanya took the stand herself. She talked about how we fell in love as teenagers and how I was her whole world. How she wanted nothing but for us to get married and have babies.

She told the jury, complete with fake tears in her eyes all about her heartbreak when she found out that I had cheated on her, but that she was willing to forgive me. That is until she found out that I had fathered a child during a one night stand.

I think that if I hadn't been holding Bella into place, she would have jumped up and clawed Tanya's eyes out. She made our relationship sound like it was nothing but a drunken mistake and that the only reason I was with Bella was because I thought my son deserved two active parents in his life and Bella was unwilling to accept anything less than full commitment from me.

I snorted and shook my head, garnering attention from the jury as well as a stern warning from the judge.

She said that James had been her study partner in school and that when I kicked her out, she went to him as a friend seeking comfort and he took advantage of her. She said that she cared for him and when he called her for help after getting out of prison, she offered to help him get back on his feet. She claimed she never knew of James' ruined marriage; that he never talked about it and she certainly didn't realize that he was using her as a means of revenge.

She stated that James started spending more and more time away, but she never really knew where he went until she caught him with this woman, Cammy with whom he was apparently having an affair. She flat out denied any involvement in the burglary of my car and our home, saying that James must have planted the stolen items in her car and home.

When asked about how her fingerprints got on the car seat, she claimed that she had nearly tripped over it in her garage and she had picked it up to question James about it.

I had to admit, she made James sound like a criminal mastermind.

She testified that the day of the music festival, she was there with James, but that he disappeared on her so she wandered around looking for him. When she came upon Charlie, lost and scared, she recognized him and figured that Bella must have lost him so she decided to try and find me to bring him back. After an hour and a half of searching, she put him in her car and drove him to the police station where she was accused of abducting him.

Then it was time for cross examination.

Mr. Howard stayed away from the details of our relationship. The jury could already see that she and I had very different ideas about what those years were like.

It wasn't until they started questioning her about the statements she made at the police station when bringing Charlie back that her facade started to crumble.

"Ms. Denali, did you or did you not make this statement at the police station. And I quote. "_I didn't have to bring your little bastard back to you_."

"Objection your honor, leading the witness."

The judge furrowed her brow in confusion. "Overruled," she said.

Tanya looked startled for a moment. "I did, but that's not what I meant."

"What about this one, Ms. Denali."

"_It's obvious his mother either lost him or abandoned him_."

"Well it was!" she screeched. "How else would a little boy like that be walking by himself?"

"He says you took him."

"He's wrong. He's a baby. He doesn't know what he's talking about."

"How did you know that he was with his mother when he disappeared? Couldn't he have been with his father? Or his aunt? Or his grandparents?"

"Of course he was with her. He was always with her."

Mr. Howard tilted his head. "Always, Ms. Denali? How often did you see Isabella Swan and her child?"

"I. . . she. . ."

"I have one last statement question for you, Ms. Denali. What did you mean by this statement. Also said at and recorded by the Port Angeles Police Department.

"_This was to show you how much I love you and make you realize how much you need and love me. I am the one who brought your son back to you. She abandoned him. She let herself get taken by that sick fuck! I hope you never get her back_."

There was an audible gasp coming from all over the courtroom. Bella's mouth dropped and she started shaking.

"Easy, baby," I tried to soothe. I started rubbing my fingertips up and down her arm and I pressed my lips against her head just behind her ear.

"I didn't. . . that's not what I said," Tanya protested.

"Oh, really? Because this was the statement written down by at least three separate officers who were standing in that room with you."

Tanya looked at her attorney and back to Mr. Howard and then at the jury. Her eyes were wide and panicked.

"No further questions your honor."

The defense re-directed, asking her if she felt like she was under duress at the time that she made those statements. She, of course, said yes, but I think even he knew at that point that she was fucked.

The defense rested their case and the jury was sent for deliberations.

Bella and I went back to the hotel and waited. It wasn't until Friday, just before lunch, that we got the phone call that the jury had a verdict. We were to be back in court at three.

XXXXXX

Bella and I sat quietly together with Cameron. I watched my fingers turning white from Bella's grip.

The jury was seated, Tanya was brought in and then the judge entered. We stood and then were told to be seated.

"Madam Forewoman," she called out. "In the case of Tanya Lee Denali, has the jury reached a verdict?"

"We have your honor."

The forewoman handed the bailiff a piece of paper and he handed it to the judge. She read it, her face completely devoid of any emotion.

"On the count of conspiracy to commit murder, how do you find?"

"We find the defendant guilty, your honor."

"On the count of kidnapping in the first degree, how do you find?"

"We find the defendant guilty, your honor."

"On the count of burglary in the second degree, how do you find?"

"We find the defendant not guilty, your honor."

I heard a loud wail and looked over to see Tanya collapse to the ground. She sobbed hysterically as her attorney tried to pick her up. He finally turned around and said something to her father who was sitting behind her just watching what was happening completely expressionless; emotionless.

Finally he got up and helped pick his daughter off the ground before returning to his wife who was crying silently into a handkerchief.

Tanya continued her sobbing as the judge looked at her and shook her head. She had no sympathy. No one had any sympathy.

The judge thanked the jury for their service.

"Sentencing will be scheduled for July 12, 2011. Court dismissed."

And that was it. It was over. James was in jail and Tanya was heading there. Of course, there would be sentencing and appeals, but for the most part, we were done with the whole fucking nightmare.

"I loved you, Edward," Tanya screeched, fighting against the guard who was trying to cuff her. "Everything I ever did was to make you love me back. That's all I wanted. She'll never be what you need. I should have fucking taken care of her when I found out about that little brat."

I could see her attorney hissing at her, but I couldn't hear what he was saying. Probably telling her to shut the hell up. How do you appeal a case when your defendant is essentially admitting guilt in the middle of a courtroom?

I was so tempted to respond; to yell; to sneer; to taunt. But I didn't. She didn't deserve my attention. I didn't even spare a second glance at her as I wrapped my arm around Bella's waist and walked out the door.

Bella was quiet; too quiet. I looked down at her, but she was wearing a mask. I knew it was a mask, because I had a similar one in place, trying to hide the hurricane of emotions that was bound to hit me the moment we were alone.

I squeezed her tighter into my side as we approached the DA.

He looked at me and then down at Bella and nodded in understanding. He'd obviously been through this reaction before.

"Thank you, Mr. Howard," I said, reaching my free hand out to shake his.

"I can honestly say that this was my pleasure. She's going away for a really long time."

"How long?" Bella asked quietly.

"She's up for fifteen to life on the kidnapping charge and twenty-five to life on the conspiracy charge, we'll just have to wait and see."

"How was she found not guilty on the burglary charges?" I asked, slightly agitated.

"The jury obviously didn't feel that there was enough evidence to convict her of that charge. She did a good job covering her tracks."

"Mr. Howard?" Bella said quietly.

"Yes, Bella?" he answered, looking over at her.

"Can she appeal using an insanity plea?"

I guess I hadn't ever thought about that. Tanya was crazy, there was no doubt, but could that keep her from going to prison?

He smiled warmly at her. "Well I have no doubt that her attorney will file for an appeal, but insanity pleas are rare and hard to prove. Even if a psychiatrist were to find that she does have some sort of mental health issues, she's already shown that she wasn't impaired. This was a well thought out plan on her part. She was savvy enough to try and cover her tracks. She knew what she was doing was wrong."

Bella looked relieved. I'm sure I did too.

We exited the courthouse to a barrage of reporters and photographers.

_"Are you disappointed in the not-guilty verdict? Are you satisfied with the guilty verdict. What will you do now?"_

Was I satisfied with the results? Sort of. I really wouldn't know until the sentencing came through, but in the mean time, I was ready to go home. We had Charlie's birthday party to prepare for and I had a proposal to finish planning.

Alice was already on board as was the rest of the family and Mrs. Jane was ecstatic. She readily offered up her home. Chief Swan was. . . amused.

"_Son, you are something else," he had laughed. "You better hope that after all this planning she says yes."_

"We've got the hotel for another night," Bella said as we climbed into the car. "Are we staying or are we going home?"

I looked over at her and saw the cheeky grin she was sporting.

"Tonight. . . we celebrate."

XXXXX

BPOV

Walking out of the courtroom, I was still kind of in a daze. It didn't seem real. Was it really over? It wasn't until we were in the car that it finally hit me, and I was almost giddy.

If we hadn't been in the car trying to maneuver through downtown Seattle, I probably would have tried to climb into Edward's lap and kiss him senseless.

When we finally pulled into the underground parking lot of our hotel, I did just that, hitching up my skirt and tugging at his tie.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Bella, baby, there are security cameras all over this joint."

"I don't care," I panted, grinding against him and feeling him stir beneath me.

My mouth was all over him; cheeks, lips, jaw, neck. Lips, lips, lips.  
His verbal protest didn't mean a damn thing while he was thrusting his hips upwards.

"I care," he breathed, blowing hot air into my ear. "I want you naked and I don't want anyone else to see your tits. They're mine."

I giggled.

"And you never know," he said, holding my hips steady and pulling away. "We've had photographers following us for months. The last thing we need right now is a hotel garage sex tape showing up on youtube. Your dad would fucking kill me."

"Ah, yes, logic. There you are," I groaned.

Edward opened his door and I climbed out, straightening my skirt. He handed me my purse and we made our way into the hotel.

When we were in the elevator I stood with my back against his chest. There were other people in there so I couldn't jump him, but I felt one of his fingers slide up the outside of my thigh. He hooked it into the waistband of my panties and tugged slightly before releasing and sliding his hand back down. I grinned, knowing he could see my reflection in the shiny surface of the wall.

When the elevator stopped at our floor his hand rested politely on the small of my back as he led me out. He maintained his composure until the lock on the door clicked shut and I suddenly found myself pressed against the wall, his mouth on mine, his tongue dominating and demanding.

I gripped at his shoulders and when he lifted me up off the ground, one of my hands threaded itself into his hair at the back of his head. I held him to me, squeezing my thighs and wrapping my feet around his legs.

My shoes fell to the floor and I felt Edward kick them to the side.

"God, I love you," he grunted as he attacked my neck.

He had shaved that morning and his skin was baby smooth, his aftershave completely intoxicating. My mind went numb, my body completely captivated by the feel of him pressed up against me.

"Bed?" I whimpered.

"Yes," he replied, grabbing my ass a little firmer and carrying me into the room.

I didn't let go as he pulled the bedspread down to reveal whiter than white sheets. He laid me down sideways across the bed, wasting no time lifting my dress and pulling my panties down. Before I could even react, his face was buried between my thighs, licking, sucking, making me writhe and moan like some wanton hussy.

_Who am I kidding? Right now I am some wanton hussy._

I felt his tongue swirl around right before he pushed two fingers inside of me.

"Oh, God," I cried out.

He hummed, sending vibrations through my entire body. His fingers curled up and he flicked his tongue across my clit rapidly. When he sucked it into his mouth, I was done. I grabbed at the sheets and tried to hold my hips still, but he kept going, making it last until I clamped my legs around his head tightly.

He started laughing as he slipped his fingers from my body, prying my knees apart to free his head.

"My Lord, what are you trying to do to me?" I threw my head back against the bed. I heard the buckle on his belt and the sound of rustling fabric, right before I felt his incredibly hard, naked body pressing down on me.

"Trying? Was I not doing a very good job?" he asked teasingly as his warm lips pressed against my throat.

"You did an excellent job, baby, thank you."

"You do realize I'm not done though, right?" He said wiggling his hips so that his erection pressed right up against me.

_Oh, he's making this too easy._

"But I'm so tired. It's been such a long day." I was trying to be convincing, but the snicker I let out gave me away.

Edward growled and I yelped when he pushed into me, filling me completely.

"You still too tired?" he asked in a low voice, as he pumped into me a few times.

"Ugh, no," I moaned. "I think I'm waking up."

"Mmmhmm," he hummed. "It's good to know that I can keep your attention."

I loved the feeling of him inside of me. I hoped that we would always be like this, craving each other all the time; finding peace when we were connected intimately. There was nothing better.

Edward rested his forehead against mine. He snaked his hands up the side of my body, wrapping them under my arms, and clamping down on my shoulders to anchor me to him as he pushed himself into me over and over again.

My shoulder was completely healed, but occasionally I'd have phantom pains when I was doing something strenuous. But at the moment, all I could feel was the erotic way Edward was swiveling his hips, hitting all my internal and external spots at the same time.

"Ready?" he asked, as he arched his back a little so that I could watch him gliding in and out of me.

"Yeah," I whispered.

He sped his movements, pushing downwards on my upper body and he thrust himself into me. Faster and faster until I could no longer hold onto any semblance of myself. Just as I hit that wall of complete and utter pleasure I felt him pulsating inside of me. I was pretty sure that between my wailing and his swearing, anyone passing by our room would have no doubt about what was happening, but I didn't care. Let them know. This was our celebration. We deserved it.

We spent another couple of hours just talking and holding onto each other. We ordered room service and made love again before finally falling asleep. It was the first really peaceful sleep I'd had in a long, long while.

We returned home the following day to an extremely happy family. They never mentioned the trial verbally, but you could see it written all over their faces. We were all ready for the nightmare to be over. And we had something much bigger to get ready for.

Charlie was turning four and it was his first real birthday party. Not only would he have his friends there, but his aunts, uncles and all of his grandparents. And most importantly, his daddy.

I honestly didn't think he could remember the time when Edward wasn't his daddy. When he called him "Eward" and made faces at him when he called him little.

That was okay with me. I knew that someday I'd have to answer questions about why Edward and the rest of the Cullen's weren't in any of his baby pictures, but hopefully my son would forgive me just as his father had. Only time would tell.

XXXXX

We were holding Charlie's party at the bouncy castle place. I smiled when we entered remembering the first time I'd taken Edward there, the day that he'd told me he wanted to be a part of Charlie's life.

I'd found myself doing that a lot; reminiscing about how much things had changed. I didn't really know why it was on my mind so much. Maybe it was the drama of the last few months, maybe it was the impending move. But thanks to Sarah, I was able to look at things without automatically feeling guilty. She had helped me through so much, not just the incident with James, but also the knowledge that I would never be able to make up for lost time. It wasn't something that I dwelled on anymore. It was something that I had accepted and moved forward from; with my family.

There were twenty three pre-schoolers running around our feet. The boys were wrestling, the girls were screeching. Rose looked like she was about to lose her lunch.

"Tell me that my kid won't scream like that," she begged, holding her hand over her significantly sized bump.

I laughed. "I can pretty much guarantee that at some point in your kid's life, he or she will scream _just_ like that."

"Well shit, I'm not letting this baby out then. He or she can stay in there forever."

"Really?"

"No, I want this baby out now," she whined. "My back aches, I've got heartburn eighty percent of the day. . . . and night. I can't even figure out how to keep myself bare."

"Uh, what?" I choked on my water.

"I can't get waxed, because my skin is too sensitive right now, but I can't fucking shave because I can't see my twat. And there's no way I'm letting Emmett anywhere near my sweet spot with a razor."

Alice and I looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"Oh, shut up," Rose growled. "What did you do?"

"Uh, nobody was looking at mine so I just let it grow."

"Would you let Edward shave you?"

"Shave her where?" Edward asked, wrapping his arms around my waist from behind.

"Ha!" I snorted. "She's asking if I'd let you shave my nether regions if I wasn't able to."

"Why wouldn't you be able to?"

I reached out and slid my hand over Rose's belly.

"Ooooooh," Edward said, understanding just exactly what we were talking about. "Yeah, I think that'd be hot. Lather you all up and get real close."

I tilted my head to look at him. His eyes were bright and happy. The end of the trial and Tanya's guilty verdict had released such a weight off of our shoulders. He hadn't even complained when Riley sent Charlie a birthday present. The card was signed from Riley _and_ Lizzie. It made me smile.

"Ewww," Alice grimaced. "You're my brother. I don't. . . just ewwww."

Edward laughed and kissed my cheek. "I'm gonna go find the birthday boy."

We let our conversation turn to more kid friendly topics.

Esme joined us after setting up the amazing two-tiered Spiderman cake that she had made for Charlie. It was covered in red icing, black spider webs and blue and black trim. Little plastic Spiderman bad guys adored the sides while a slightly larger Spiderman scaled a brick building on the top.

"So. . ." I heard Jake say as he put his arm around my shoulders. I looked up at him and saw his toothy grin. "New York City, huh?"

"Yeah," I nodded.

"Are you excited?"

"Excited, nervous, scared out of my fucking mind."

"You'll be okay, Bells," he soothed.

"I know we will."

I heard an excited squeal and scanned the room, looking for the source. There were lots of other children, but there was no mistaking that the noise had come from mine.

When I finally found him I tilted my head and let my lips curve up into a smile.

Edward was swinging him around in circles. Charlie's eyes were closed tight, his expression a mix of immense joy and absolute terror. Edward laughed and stopped twirling, pulling Charlie in close and wrapping his arms around his back. My son's eyes opened and he giggled.

I watched as Edward leaned his forehead against Charlie's and his lips started moving, speaking to him so quietly that only the two of them could hear. Charlie's little hands came up to rest on Edward's cheeks and he grinned and nodded.

There was so much love and so much warmth in the way they looked at one another. Their bond had become closer than I had ever imagined possible; they had become each other's world. And I wouldn't have had it any other way.

**XXXXXXX**

**AN: Phew. Like I said, a beast.**

**From past reviews I know that many of you are torn on the going away for school issue. This was not an easy decision for our couple (or for me for that matter) but this is always how I had it planned. Trust me, I did consider changing things, but I just couldn't. I had this ending planned from pretty much the beginning and I gotta stay true to where I wanted it to go.**

**There will be one more regular chapter and then an epi. I know you are all eager for one particular thing. LOL.**

**Okay, one last shameless plug for myself. My new story has posted, you can find it on my profile.**

**REC: Firefly in Summer by primarycolors**

******Edward finds himself back in the little beach town of his childhood when he inherits the local bar from his uncle. The elusive, pretty girl next door has killer legs, a sketchbook and secrets that are slowly eating her alive.**

******Gah. This just recently updated and it's been killing me not to be able to read it. Now that I've posted...I'm running to read.**


	39. Running on Sunshine

**AN: I cannot believe that this is the final regular chapter. I don't quite know how to feel about that. **

**Mollie did amazing things with this chapter. You just wouldn't believe. :oD**

**Mel and Lexie, thank you for always giving me that last little tweak I need to go forward.**

**FFnet was giving me trouble with replying to review the last couple of days so there are a few of you who didn't get a response. I'm sorry. I'll try and figure out what's going on. **

**This chapter toggles between POVs a lot. You'll see why. It's important. **

**There is a cheese factor to this chapter, but remember who we're dealing with. And a mush factor. You might need tissues. **

**Disclaimer as usual. **

**XXXXXX**

Chapter: Running on Sunshine

BPOV

The day of our going away party came up faster than I was prepared for. Everything that we would need in New York was packed away in boxes already on its way across the country. We were essentially living out of suitcases.

I woke to Edward's warm arm draped heavily over my waist. I shifted, trying to stretch without waking him. He grunted and I smiled as his hand snaked under my tank top and cupped my breast. He kneaded it unconsciously for a couple of minutes, flicking his thumb over my nipple.

It always amazed me how well he could feel me up, even when he was asleep.

I knew when he was actually awake. His movements became much more purposeful, his fingers pinching and pulling gently. His lips brushed against my shoulder and he hummed.

I tilted my head as he moved his way up the side of my neck and along my jaw. His hand moved downwards, gliding over my stomach and under the waistband of my underwear.

I felt his hips press against my backside gyrating. I laughed. He did the same thing almost every single morning. I think it was an instinctive action.

"What are you laughing at?" he asked, his voice thick with sleep.

"You."

"What about me?"

I pushed my butt backwards and he sucked in a little bit of air.

"Is that an invitation?" he purred, sucking my earlobe into his mouth. "You know, this is the last time we're going to be able to make love in this apartment for awhile."

"That's what you said last night," I giggled.

His mouth curved into a grin against my skin. "Yes, well, I couldn't have possibly predicted that you'd be this worked up this morning."

I whimpered when his fingers entered me.

"Me?"

"Uh huh. You. This is all you, baby. I like you this way, though."

He slid my panties down to my thighs and let me kick them off the rest of the way before hitching my leg backwards over his.

"I'm sure you do."

He used his hand to open me before slipping himself inside. We moved together quietly; just feeling.

His breath was heavy against my back, one hand on my hip, the other holding himself up slightly so he could control his movements.

It didn't take us long. I let out a soft cry of complete ecstasy seconds before his body tensed and I felt him empty inside of me. We didn't move from that position. He simply held me in his arms until our alarm went off at seven.

The day was going to be long, I had no doubt. We had a shitload of things to do. I wanted to get one last load of laundry done, including the sheets. I needed to do another sweep of the apartment to make sure that we weren't leaving anything essential and then we had to get ready for the party.

Alice said that originally they were just going to have it at Esme and Carlisle's house, but Esme ran into Mrs. Jane at the hospital and she offered up her home. I thought it was a fantastic idea since that was one of Edward's favorite places to be. We had spent quite a bit of time there over the last several months. We had been trying to take Charlie to visit more often, knowing that we were going away. He would work in the conservatory with Mrs. Jane while Edward played for me. I'd sit on the sofa pretending to read while he worked on what he called his "new masterpiece." At times, he'd also play our song; the one he had played for me the first time. He'd be plucking away at the keys and all of the sudden morph into the introduction. I'd smile and glance up at him to find him watching me. Sometimes he'd smirk, sometimes he'd wink and sometimes he'd just throw me that damned crooked smile. I wondered if there would ever be a day that it wouldn't affect me. I hoped not.

Our plan was to head out after the party and stay overnight in Seattle. Yes, we were driving across the country. . . with a four year old. What the hell were we thinking? Oh, yes. Carlisle suggested that we do it; take our time and stop by some of the national landmarks. Make it educational for Charlie. He was so excited about it that he even bought him a camera. It was just one of those point and shoot ones, but Charlie thought it was the best thing in the whole world. How do you say no when your child is so excited about it? We couldn't. Luckily we didn't have a set amount of time to do this journey so if we needed to spend a few days out of the car, we could do that too. The moving company had said that it would take about two weeks for our things to arrive, but depending on the weather and the road construction, it could take a little bit longer.

XXXXX

Edward and I had travelled to Columbia in May to try and find an apartment and possible schooling options for Charlie. We stumbled on a really great apartment for rent in the Morningside Heights area that surrounded Columbia. It had 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms in a secure apartment building. There was a farmer's market practically right outside and all sorts of cultural experiences within walking distance. The apartment itself wasn't very big, but it had been recently renovated and I fell in love almost immediately; until the real estate agent told us that it was three grand a month. I nearly swallowed my tongue. Edward said it was fine and that we'd take it, but I protested, especially upon finding out that not only would we have to pay for the first and last month's rent immediately, we'd also have to pay an additional month's rent to secure it because it was available immediately and we wouldn't be moving until July. Essentially Edward would be writing a check for nine thousand dollars just to secure the apartment.

"That's too much money, Edward."

He frowned. I knew what he was thinking. _The money conversation again?_

He let out a frustrated breath and ran his hand through his hair. "I could probably buy us an apartment on Park Avenue, Bella. Three grand is nothing."

I knew that he had money, but it just seemed like such a waste. I thought he was exaggerating about the ability to buy a multi-million dollar home until he pulled out his iPhone and showed me the balance of an account that I had never seen before.

"Holy fuck!" I practically shouted.

"Yeah," he said, rolling his eyes. "I haven't touched the money from my biological father's estate. It's been sitting there for nearly twenty years accumulating interest. I guarantee it is more than enough to cover this place."

My brain was reeling over the numbers he was showing me.

"You touched it when we opened up the household account," I pointed out when I was finally able to speak again.

He shook his head. "No, I didn't. That was the college fund that Carlisle and Mom set up."

"Really?" I asked, completely confused. "Why'd they set you up with it if you already had your father's trust?"

Edward swallowed. "There's a bad taste associated with my father, Bella. He wasn't a very nice guy. It hasn't been easy for any of us to accept that money."

"So why now?" I asked cautiously.

He shrugged. "Because if we can use it to make sure we're comfortable and Charlie's in a good place while we're both in school, it's worth it."

I took a deep breath.

"Baby, I know this is hard for you," he said, rubbing my back. "But you took care of Charlie all on your own for years. Let me take care of you both now."

We signed the lease twenty minutes later. We also applied to have Charlie at the Children's Learning Center, a Columbia University affiliated pre-school and daycare, which was only a couple of blocks from the apartment. We enrolled him for four days a week. It was going to cost us another thirteen thousand dollars per year. I gritted my teeth as Edward wrote out yet another deposit check. It wasn't that I was trying to be stubborn. I wasn't, but it was hard to let go of something so ingrained. My parents were not wealthy, I was raised to be frugal and regardless of how much money Edward had, I probably always would be. But this wasn't about me. This was about Charlie's education and for that, I would bite my tongue and accept that this is what it would cost to go to a good pre-school in New York City.

Edward also took me over to the Teachers College which was associated with Columbia University and had an _amazing_ program called a Master of Education in Psychological Counseling. After watching Leslie Ripley work with Charlie and Sarah work with Edward and I, I had decided that private practice was definitely something that I wanted to do. It was this option at Columbia that had been the deciding factor for us. Of course the other schools had similar programs either there or nearby, but Columbia was the best option for us.

XXXXX

I disentangled myself from Edward and crawled out of bed. Edward rolled onto his back and put his hands behind his head. He looked. . . awkward. Like he was trying to be relaxed and wasn't quite able to convince himself.

"What's the matter?" I asked, frowning.

His eyes widened a bit. "Nothing, why?"

"You look weird."

"Thanks," he scoffed with a laugh.

"That's not what I meant," I said, shaking my head. "Are you thinking about the move?"

"No, I'm thinking about the fact that there's going to be a karaoke machine and copious amounts of alcohol at this party this afternoon," he teased. "I know for a fact I'm going to be asked to put on a show at least once."

I rolled my eyes. Why Emmett had insisted on a karaoke machine for this thing was beyond me.

"Hey, you knew what you were getting yourself into when you told him to go for it, baby."

"Yes, yes I did," he sighed with a smile.

By the time I went to the bathroom, cleaned myself up a little, and brushed my teeth, Edward was in the kitchen with Charlie. They were making pancakes and Edward was letting Charlie stir the batter.

"Good morning, Mommy," Charlie said very articulately, nodding his head with each word.

Edward chuckled.

"Good morning, Charlie," I imitated him. "What are you making?"

"Chokwit chip pancakes." He frowned. "ChockLit."

Charlie had been working on his L's in school. The day he no longer replaced them all with W's would be a very sad day indeed, but I knew that it would happen eventually.

We sat together at the dining room table. I shot a glare at Edward as he over-indulged Charlie's pancakes with syrup. . . again. He pretended not to notice.

After everything was said and done I went to take a shower while Edward got Charlie dressed for the party. I was standing in my bra and panties when there was a knock on my bedroom door.

"Hello, hello," Alice grinned as she opened the door to peak in.

"Hey! Come on in," I smiled. "You look nice."

She was wearing a medium grey dress that came down in a V at her neckline and flared out at the bottom.

"Why thank you," she said doing a little twirl.

She obviously read the look on my face.

"Don't worry, sweetie. I brought you a bunch of dresses for you to try on. I figured that most of your good clothes would be packed away."

Truth was, I didn't really have any good dresses. The ones that I did have had been destroyed and I never had a reason to buy anything new. I did have a couple of skirts and sweater dresses that I wore to the trials and to Tanya's sentencing hearing, but I didn't want to wear those to the party in the middle of July.

Tanya had been sentenced four days earlier. It wasn't as crazy as it had been during the trial. People had moved on to the next big story. The press was still there, but they were fairly subdued. No one shoved a camera in our faces. Edward was giving a victim impact statement, otherwise, we probably wouldn't have gone. I never wanted to see her face again.

XXXXX

_Once again, we sat with Cameron while Tanya was led to her seat. This time, there was no tacky dress. She wore a simple orange jumpsuit; her hair pulled back into a ponytail. Her ankles were shackled together, as were her wrists. She looked dead. Her face was pale and her eyes hollow. She didn't even look up to see if anyone was there to witness. Her parents were there and they briefly acknowledged us before sitting down behind Tanya. She didn't look at them either._

_Edward was called to the stand._

_"Mr. Cullen." The judge nodded at him. "You may proceed with your statement."_

_Edward pursed his lips and took a deep breath._

_"I have spent the last couple months trying to figure out exactly what I wanted to say here today. I have run the gamut of emotions, most of them some form of anger, but also sadness. And. . . I cannot help, but feel some form of guilt."_

_I watched as Tanya lifted her head slightly, her eyes flickering towards Edward. There was a slight murmur that flittered through the crowd, but it died down when he began to speak again._

_"We were kids. We were kids who made mistakes and stupid decisions. Relationships were supposed to come and go. We were supposed to move on and grow up. **This**. . ." he said motioning towards Tanya. "Was not supposed to happen. I understand that Tanya Denali was angry with me, but that is no justification for what she has done."_

_I could see Edward swallow, his jaw set._

_"I don't understand what happened. I will not ever understand. All I know is that she tried to manipulate her way back into my life and into my heart and when that didn't work, she decided that the way to get what she wanted was to take revenge out on the people that I love the most."_

_Tanya breathed in deeply and I could see her shaking._

_"Isabella Swan did not deserve to be brought into this. She did not ask to be loved by me. She did not do **anything** that would make her deserving of having someone plot to end her life. Our son was ripped right out from underneath her. She was taken, drugged, beat up and almost killed by a man Tanya hired to get rid of her. Simply because I loved her."_

_"But the most unforgiving thing for both Bella and I, is what that woman did to our son. I cannot tell you the emotion that went through me when I found out that my three-year-old son was originally supposed to be murdered right next to his mother. There are no words to express. . ." Edward stopped talking. I could see his eyes, shining with tears, but so filled with fury. He grit his teeth together and continued._

_"He thought his mother was dead. I held him in my arms and tried to comfort him as he sobbed because he was told that his mother would not be coming back for him. Two hours with that woman and our son was afraid to let go of either of us. He couldn't sleep by himself; he started wetting the bed again after being toilet trained for almost a year and he needed to see a therapist just to help him feel safe again. There is no sentence in this world that can make up for what she did to him; to us."_

_I heard quiet sobbing and looked around. But I couldn't pinpoint who it was coming from because they were all wiping their eyes. I let my tears fall freely. Cameron squeezed my hand comfortingly._

_Edward looked at the judge. "Your honor, I've been told what the possible sentences are for Tanya Denali. I honestly do not believe that we will ever feel safe if she is released from prison. She has already shown us the lengths that she will go to in order to get what she wants. On behalf of Isabella Swan and myself, along with our son, I ask that you sentence her to the maximum amount of time that the law will allow."_

_Edward was excused and came back down to sit next to me. He slid his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to him._

_"Will the defendant please rise?" The judge said after a few minutes._

_Tanya and her attorney both stood up. Her head was still down, but when her attorney nudged her, she lifted it to face the judge._

_"If there were only one thing that could be held as unforgivable in the eyes of the law, it would be destroying the innocence of a child to serve your own needs. That is exactly what you have done, Ms. Denali. You took a child, a toddler, from his mother and made him afraid that he would never see her again. And if you had been successful, he never would have. That is something that this court cannot excuse."_

_She looked down and then back up at Tanya. "Tanya Lee Denali. For the kidnapping of the minor child Charles Anthony Swan Cullen and for conspiring to kidnap and murder Isabella Marie Swan, you are hereby sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole. You will serve out your time at the Mission Creek Corrections Center for Women. This court is dismissed."_

_I half expected for Tanya to put on another show of wailing or fainting, but she didn't. There was nothing. No sound, no words, no glances towards anyone. Her attorney whispered to her, but she didn't look up at him. She didn't move to say goodbye to her parents. She simply let herself be led out of the room._

XXXXXX

"Okay, so, this is what I have," Alice piped up as she started pulling dresses from a garment bag. "Let's try them on and we'll pick one."

"Alice, I can dress myself," I laughed.

"I know you can, but you're leaving, Bella," she said sadly. "I feel like I just got you back and your moving away already."

"You make it sound like we're never coming back."

"I know you'll be back for Christmas and every other time you can get away, but it won't be the same."

I pulled her to me and hugged her tightly. "I'm gonna miss you," I sniffed.

"I'm gonna miss you too. You have no idea what it's meant to me to have you back in my life. And Charlie too. I love him so much."

"I know you do, Alice. We love you too."

I let her go and picked up one of the dresses from the bed.

I tried on a total of six dresses. All of them were summer dresses and of varying colors. They all looked wonderful so I left it up to Alice.

"This one." She grinned at me, holding up a strapless little white dress with a bright red tie that went around the middle and ended in a bow at my side.

I quickly put on a little bit of make-up and let Alice pin my hair up before we joined the rest of our family who were loading up the cars to head to Mrs. Jane's.

"Oh, look at my handsome boy!" I squealed. Charlie was dressed in a pair of light grey pinstriped slacks and a white top.

"You look absolutely gorgeous." Edward said as his lips pressed against my ear.

"Why thank you," I smiled sweetly and batted my eyelashes at him playfully.

Edward looked amazing himself. I laughed when I realized that both of my guys were dressed exactly alike.

"Hmm, wait, I'll be right back," he winked and ran back into his parents' house. When he came back down, he was wearing a red tie that matched the one around my waist perfectly.

"I thought that maybe Carlisle had one that color," he grinned.

I shook my head in amusement and climbed into the front seat of the car.

When we got to Mrs. Jane's, there were cars parked all over the place, but Edward was able to park right up front. He pulled Charlie out of his car seat as I stepped out and closed the car door.

The front door to the manor was open and Rose was standing just inside, holding her little bundle in her arms. Avery Elizabeth Cullen was born on May sixteenth, four weeks ahead of schedule. She weighed in at a mere five pounds one ounce.

_"How is it even possible that Emmett is like four inches taller and fifty pounds heavier than Edward and you have this petite little person?" I pouted as I held her for the first time at the hospital._

_Rose laughed. "She's an entire month early, Bella. Charlie was two weeks late, wasn't he?"_

_I ignored Rose's logic and sat down in the rocking chair next to her bed. Avery was fast asleep all swaddled up in the standard hospital baby blanket and a little pink hat knitted by the volunteers._

_I heard a clearing throat and looked up to find Emmett and Edward standing in the doorway. Emmett had a sleeping Charlie in his arms and a giant grin on his face. Edward was looking at me in a way that I'd never seen before and I had absolutely no way of describing it._

_I tilted my head and narrowed my eyes._

_"You want to come see your niece?" I asked._

_Edward didn't answer._

_"Ed, man, your girl's talking to you," Emmett laughed, elbowing his brother in the ribs._

_"Ow! What?"_

_"Do you want to come see your niece?" I repeated._

_Edward smiled. "Of course I do."_

_I stood up and handed him the baby. He looked a little awkward and nervous. I was almost afraid to let go of her._

_"I've never held a baby before," he said quietly._

_I looked at him sadly. Our eyes met and he told me, without words, that it was okay._

_I let go of Avery, positioning Edward's arms around her so that he was a little more comfortable._

_"She's beautiful," he said reverently. "Rose, you did good." He winked at his sister-in-law._

_Rose looked tired. Her hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail and she wasn't wearing any make-up, but she still was beautiful; and so happy._

_"What about me?" Emmett whined. "I did good too."_

_Rose snorted. "You practically fucking fainted, Em."_

_Emmett scowled. "Okay, you didn't see what I saw. She was all bloody and. . . gross."_

_He shifted Charlie on his shoulder, waking him._

_He lifted his head and looked around trying to gauge his surroundings._

_"Is dat da baby?" he asked, when his eyes landed on Avery._

_"Yes, sweetie," Rose said. "If you wash your hands, maybe your Daddy will help you hold her."_

_Watching as Edward and Charlie fawned over the tiny little girl made my ovaries explode. Someday we'd have another baby. Of that I was sure._

I handed Edward my purse and practically ran to Rose.

"Oh, I see how it is," he chuckled.

"Well hello, gorgeous girl," I cooed as I pulled Avery into my arms.

"She's been fussy all morning," Rose yawned.

"Still not sleeping through the night?"

"She's getting better. I'm getting about three to four uninterrupted hours at a time. Emmett sleeps right through the crying so he's absolutely no help."

"Oh, is your daddy a big old putz?" I asked the little girl with the big blue eyes staring at me.

"I heard that!" Emmett yelled from somewhere inside.

Rose and I laughed.

The party was in full swing. There were decorations and music and food. People were talking and drinking. The whole place was filled with laughter. After a few minutes, I handed Avery to Esme, who had been following me around just waiting to get her hands on her granddaughter. I found and joined Edward in a group that included Angela, her boyfriend Ben, Tyler Crowley and his girlfriend, who was visiting from Oregon.

My dad and Carlisle were bonding over. . . something or other. My dad had apparently traded up for this party and the two were sitting at a table drinking whiskey on the rocks.

Sure enough there was a damned karaoke machine. Emmett and Jasper were currently singing their own rendition of AC/DC's You Shook Me All Night Long. Charlie was dancing around with a couple of other kids completely oblivious to the words of the song.

Edward was leaned back in his chair, one arm around my shoulders, drinking a beer and laughing.

"God, we need a video camera," he laughed. "This is YouTube gold right here."

A little while later Alice grabbed my hand.

"Come on, sweetie, we have a song to sing."

"Oh ho ho, no," I snorted. "I'm not getting up there."

"Yes you are. This is your party, you have to."

"What are you going to make me sing?" I questioned.

"You can pick if you want to," she agreed.

Alice and I poured over the book, finally choosing a song that we both completely lost it over. My dad was gonna shit, but that was the fun part.

When Fever, by Peggy Lee started playing, all eyes were on us. Alice and I played it up, slinking ourselves up to Edward and Jasper and rubbing all over them.

I'm not sure how amused Carlisle and Dad were. Luckily, I think the alcohol must have loosened them up because when I sang the part about Pocahontas asking her daddy not to kill John Smith, my dad just busted out laughing.

I flopped myself down in Edward's lap and kissed his lips softly.

"That was beautiful, baby," he grinned.

"Just for you," I said nipping at his lower lip.

"Your turn, man," Jasper said to Edward handing him the microphone.

Edward's eyes widened. "I'm not sure I'm ready yet," he chuckled.

"Oh, I think you're ready," Jasper nodded.

Edward sighed. I stood and let him up. Instead of sitting back down I went to stand next to Alice.

"This should be good," I laughed.

"Oh, yeah, I do believe it will be," she agreed.

Edward and Jasper stood over the book. Edward looked nervous. Jasper clapped him on the back just as the music started.

All the sudden it was like Edward was in a whole different mode. I recognized the song immediately. It was Jesus Jackson's Running on Sunshine.

He winked at me and started singing. . . and dancing.

_Girl you got me trippin' on sunshine_

_God knows you just made my day_

_Since you came around, oh, I just can't slow down, no_

_I wanna see you walkin' my way._

"Oh. . . my God," I laughed, putting my hand over my face. "What is he doing?"

Alice giggled and shook her head.

Edward slid up right in front of me and waggled his eyebrows. The man was totally insane. He had to have been drunk.

_Girl you got me thinkin' bout diamonds_

_And gettin' down on one knee, maybe two, ooh lord_

He got down on one knee and crawled up to me, before standing up.

_People may stop and stare, but I don't even care, no_

_Just as long as I am with you._

_~o~_

_You got me running on sunshine_

_Ain't no clouds getting in my way_

_I must be running on sunshine_

_Ain't no rain getting in my way,_

He made his way around the back of me and pressed himself against me. I jumped a little, shocked and a little embarrassed.

_Girl you got me actin' real crazy_

_Chasin tail like some old dog_

_Ooh, I got this rocket, in my front left pocket_

_Ready to explode like a bomb_

My jaw fucking dropped as he slapped my ass and turned me to face him again. I glanced over at my father who had a very conflicted look on his face. I'm sure it only got worse as Edward's hands roamed my hips and he started dancing with me in a very provocative manner. Of course I went with it.

_Something tells me your name is Lucy_

_Cause everything keeps shaking around_

_We can cop a room, make these walls go boom_

_We can do this right here and now, now, now._

He let the music go to the chorus and grabbed my hand to dance. He swung me around to the whistles and shouts of everyone in the room.

_Girl you got me trippin' on sunshine_

_God knows you just made my day_

_Since you came around, oh, I just can't slow down, no_

_I wanna see you walkin' my way._

_~o~_

_Girl you got me thinkin' bout diamonds_

_And gettin' down on one knee, maybe two, ooh lord_

_People may stop and stare, but I don't even care, no_

_Just as long as I am with you._

_~o~_

_You got me running on sunshine_

_Ain't no clouds getting in my way_

_I must be running on sunshine_

_Ain't no rain getting in my way._

_~o~_

_You got me running on sunshine_

_Ain't no rain getting in my way_

_I must be running on sunshine_

_Ain't no rain getting in my way._

Edward finished up his song on his knees in front of me again. Everyone had been watching him so I expected them all to break out into applause, but the room was completely silent. It was creeping me out.

"Was that just for me?" I laughed.

"Just for you," he repeated my words with a smile. I saw him look over at Charlie and tilt his head a few times towards me.

Charlie ran up and shoved a black velvet box in my hand.

"What's this?" I asked him.

"It's from Daddy," he whispered.

I narrowed my eyes at Edward, but he just grinned back at me. Opening the box, l gasped. Inside was the most gorgeous ring I had ever seen in my entire life.

I stared at it with my mouth open for what felt like an eternity. I was having one of those moments when all the puzzle pieces were falling into place and I still couldn't see the picture. I heard Edward clear his throat.

EPOV

I cleared my throat and nudged Charlie with my elbow. He looked at me, his lower lip tucked up in between his teeth, and then jumped a little.

"Oh yeah," he chirped, obviously remembering what he was supposed to say next. "Mommy, Daddy wants to marry us."

I heard Emmett snort from somewhere, but I didn't look around to see where. I knew it was Emmett because I heard Rose hiss at him to be quiet.

Bella was just standing there, looking at the ring. What I wouldn't have done to read her thoughts. I knew she wasn't expecting this. I had gone to great lengths to make sure she wasn't suspicious of my plans.

I rose from my knees slowly, wrapping my arms instinctively around her waist and drawing her into me. Leaning in I breathed out over her ear.

"Isabella Swan," I whispered just for her. "I have loved you from the very first moment I laid eyes on you. I knew even back then that you were made for me, but I was just so scared to tell you how I felt. Scared that you could never love me back. " I put my hand on her neck and rubbed my thumb over her cheek.

"I completely fucked up," I smiled sadly. "And yet you have given me everything I never knew I needed or wanted. Love," I kissed her lips lightly. "Life," I looked down to Charlie who was standing at our legs, running my hands through his hair. He looked up at me and grinned. He was bouncing on his toes and I wondered if he was as anxious as I was to hear his mommy's answer. "I cannot spend another moment without you as my wife. Please. . . please, say you'll marry me."

I pulled away, but didn't let go. I wanted to see her beautiful face. I needed to see the look in her eyes at that very moment. She needed to know the depth of my love.

She looked like she was about to pass out. I needed to make sure she didn't. I was only holding myself together because I had a plan. Bella fainting wasn't part of the plan.

"Breathe, baby," I begged.

She let out three short puffs of air and then put her hands on my face. Tears slipped unceremoniously from the corners of her eyes and down her cheeks.

"Yes," she whispered softly, just before she grabbed the back of my neck and pulled my mouth to hers. Her lips were soft and warm and everything I needed.

"Yes?" I asked against them. Making double sure I heard her right.

"Yes," she nodded.

"She said yes," Emmett yelled, much to the amusement of everyone around him. Whistles and shouts and applause broke out, but I barely heard it.

She said yes.

I pulled the ring from its box and tried to put in on Bella's finger, but it was slightly more difficult than I had anticipated, because both of our hands were shaking.

"Do it today," Charlie yelled jumping up and down and clapping his little hands. "Today, today, today."

_And here we go._

Bella laughed, unsuspectingly. "I don't know about today, baby."

She turned back to look at me, but I wasn't laughing.

I was looking at her expectantly; waiting for her answer. This is where I would find out if all of my planning would work out the way that I'd hoped.

"Wait. Today? Like, right now?" Her eyes were wide in disbelief.

I nodded silently.

"Are you serious?" She had a look on her face like she was waiting for me to tell her I was just kidding. But I wasn't.

"Absolutely," I smirked.

"But. . . we don't have. . . there's nothing."

"What more do we need, Bella?" I asked. "We've got our family. We've got our friends. You're wearing a white dress."

Bella looked down and her mouth dropped. She turned her head to look at my sister.

"You knew about this?" she screeched.

Alice giggled and nodded. Jasper winked and tipped his head in affirmation. I watched as every single family member confirmed that they did, indeed, know about my surprise. The crowd around them was also nodding and smiling. When Bella turned to her father, his mustache twitched and he coughed a little, putting his hand to his mouth to hide his amusement.

"You too?"

Chief Swan chuckled.

Bella looked back at me and narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

"And what if I say no?"

My heart jumped into my throat and I could feel the color drain from my face.

_She wouldn't say no, would she? She already said yes. I think._

"To marrying me?"

Realization hit her as to what she had said and her face softened.

"No. God, no, baby. I mean to doing it right now?"

Was she testing me to see how serious I was?

I looked at her thoughtfully. I could see it in her eyes; there was no way that she was saying no.

"Then we'll have one hell of an engagement party," I grinned. "I'm ready whenever you are, love."

I knew that everyone around us was watching, waiting for an answer. Was there going to be a wedding or just a party? When I first started thinking about it, I planned on just proposing. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I didn't want to do things the traditional way. Nothing else about our relationship was traditional. And the minute she said yes, assuming she did, I didn't want to wait another day, much less a few months, to make her my wife. I just hoped that she felt the same way.

Charlie was bouncing up and down on his toes. The fact that he was still standing next to us and hadn't taken off to play yet told me that he was almost as anxious about his mommy's answer as I was.

"Okay?" she squeaked.

"Is that a question?" I asked, laughing.

"No!" she yelped. "Yes, that's a yes. I'll marry you today. Right now."

_Thank fucking God. I was about to having a fucking heart attack._

I could no longer resist her. I dove in, picking her up and smashing my mouth against hers.

"Thank you," I sighed. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

Before I could even finish kissing her, everything turning into a complete fucking whirlwind. I have no idea what happened. People were pulling us in different directions; words of congratulations were shouted, whispered and cheered. I held Charlie perched on one arm while keeping a firm grip on Bella's waist with the other.

I had delegated Alice and Mom to do a lot of the organization primarily so that Bella wouldn't know what I was up to, but also because they really, really wanted to and I had no fucking clue on how to plan a surprise wedding. I was pretty sure they didn't happen that often.

Suddenly Mrs. Jane was in front of us. "Come on with me, my lovelies," she smiled affectionately, gripping Bella's hand and dragging her forward.

When she got to the doors to the conservatory, she opened them slowly. I had yet to see how it had turned out and I was not disappointed. In fact, I was completely floored. Everything had been arranged so that the center of the room was completely open, but filling the space were dozens of white chairs. They were separated into two sides, making an aisle down the center. At the front stood an archway decorated with greenery and all sorts of flowers.

"How long have you been planning this?" Bella asked tilting her head towards me.

"A while," I smiled crookedly.

"He asked me in January," Chief Swan stage whispered from behind us.

"January?" Bella yelped.

I flashed a scowl at my soon to be father-in-law, but he just chuckled.

"You all have known about this since January and no one spilled the secret?"

"No, they've all known since April," I explained. "Alice since March."

Bella's head twisted around looking for Alice, but she was looking everywhere but at Bella, whistling a little tune.

"Some best friend you are!"

"I figured I owed it to my brother to keep my mouth shut for once," she smiled lightly.

I nodded. "That you did."

Bella started to walk forward, but her dad grabbed her arm. "Um, nope, kid. You stay here, they go there." He pulled her to the side and let people by. I stepped with them and bent down, setting Charlie on his feet.

"I'll see you at the altar," I purred, lifting her knuckles to my lips and kissing her ring. I winked at her and backed away before turning and making my way down the aisle.

BPOV

I stood in the hallway until everyone had filed past. I was still trying to wrap my head around what the hell was happening. Alice was talking beside me, but I had no idea what until she put her hand on my arm.

"Okay, the dress is new, the ring is old."

I looked down at the ring in confusion. I suppose it did look antique. I gazed at it.

Gorgeous.

"He didn't tell you, did he?" Alice asked.

"Tell me what?"

"That ring belonged to our grandmother, Elizabeth Masen."

"Really?" I asked, surprised.

She nodded. "She and Grampa Masen were so in love. They were soul mates. Edward knew immediately that it was the ring for you."

I bit my lip, my mind flashing to how long he had been planning this. I couldn't help but wonder how long before that had he been thinking about it?

"Wait, Elizabeth Masen. . .the keepsake box?"

"That's the one," Alice chimed with a smirk. "Okay, so something old, something new," she continued.

"And I've got the something borrowed and blue," Esme said, handing me a small flat box. Inside was a baby blue lace garter. And a piece of worn paper.

"That has been worn by every single Cullen woman on their wedding day for five generations. I wore it on mine, Rose wore it on hers, Alice will wear it in December, but I would love for you to wear it today," she smiled.

"What's this?" I asked, pulling out the piece of paper. I unfolded it to find about a dozen signatures, followed by the dates. Rose's was the most recent.

"Oh," I squeaked. "Esme, it's beautiful, thank you. I would love to wear it."

My father excused himself while Alice helped me put it on.

"Let's not forget about the bouquet. Here are your flowers, my dear," Mrs. Jane said handing me a bouquet of deep red carnations. "Edward said that this was the first flower he ever gave to you." She winked at me. "The flower of desire and devotion. You bring out the passion in him."

I could feel my face heat up at the tone of her voice. Like she knew just how much passion there was between us.

I lowered my head just as Alice was trying to slather me with some foundation.

"Don't do that," she scolded. "You've got tear tracks all the way down your face. I need to fix them."

I let her reapply my foundation and she dashed a bit of blush and mascara on me along with some tinted lip gloss. She didn't try to overdo me, which I very much appreciated.

"I'm going to need that," she said, pointing to my left hand.

I didn't want to take it off. I covered it with my opposite hand and shook my head.

"Why do I have to take it off?" I whimpered.

"He's going to put it right back on your finger in about fifteen minutes, Bella," she laughed.

Reluctantly, I slipped it off and handed it to her. She put it back in the little velvet box and held onto it. Even though it had only been on my finger for about twenty minutes, it suddenly felt naked and empty. I wanted it back. Now.

Once everyone appeared to be seated, my dad led me to the end of the aisle.

"You ready for this?" He asked, holding onto my arm.

"Are you?" I teased.

"He's a good man, Bella," he smiled. "I have no doubts."

I heard music start playing and watched as Alice whispered to Charlie and handed him the velvet box. My eyes widened. I was just praying that he wouldn't start throwing it into the air.

He started out slowly down the aisle. He was watching his feet and taking very purposeful steps. People were snickering and giggling. Charlie looked up and turned back to look at me, his face tinged pink. Alice urged him forward. He looked up towards Edward and Jasper standing beside him. Edward curled his fingers, beckoning Charlie to come forward. He waited about two seconds and then started running. Everyone laughed.

He threw himself at Edward's leg and held on tight until Jasper pried him off and pulled him to stand off to the side.

Alice started down the aisle and when she got to the front, she turned around.

Just before I started walking, a new tune began. I tilted my head. It was Edward playing his song; his "new masterpiece". But he was standing in front of me, at the other end of the aisle, smiling almost shyly.

My father urged me on and we began walking. I couldn't tell you who was sitting where because I could not tear my eyes from the man waiting for me. His green eyes blazed brightly and his lips were pursed together happily. He was sort of bouncing. When we got to the front, my father kissed me on the cheek and grabbed my hand gently before placing it into Edward's.

The two shared a look of mutual respect and then my father stepped backwards, leaving me to the man who had become my life.

EPOV

Bella's soft hand slid into mine and she stepped up to my side.

"Is this what you were writing that song for?" she whispered.

I grinned at her. "You said you wanted to feel my soul again. I figured what better time and place to give it to you than at our wedding."

I stared at my bride. She looked almost angelic. Her face was lit up by the sun shining through the conservatory; her eyes glowed brightly and her cheeks were tinted pink.

"Do you like it?" I asked quietly.

"I love it," she sighed. "I love you."

"Are we ready?" The minister asked, reminding us both that he was standing there waiting for us.

I peered around the side of Bella to see Charlie pulling at the clip on the black skinny tie I had put on him.

"Charlie!" I called out.

His head popped up, his expression sheepish.

"Are we ready?"

He nodded frantically.

Our little interaction earned us some laughter from our guest and family.

I turned back to the minister. "We're ready."

The ceremony was not very long. Truth be told, I couldn't remember much. I was too focused on getting to the kissing the bride part. And the Mrs. Cullen part. I really couldn't wait for that.

We repeated the words that the minister spoke, vowing to love, honor, and cherish each other for the rest of our lives. That would be easy.

I could not take my eyes off of Bella. Jasper handed me the ring. I still could not take my eyes off Bella. Not even when I slid my Grandmother's ring onto Bella's finger could I look away from her face. I wanted to see every little expression, every emotion that played out.

When it came time for Bella to put the ring on my finger though, she froze. She looked almost panicked and I wondered why. Until I realized that she had no idea that I was also taking a family heirloom. I laughed and motioned at Alice to give Bella the ring.

Bella opened her fist and looked at the simple platinum men's wedding band; the symbol that I belonged to her forever.

She squeaked when her shaking hands almost dropped it, but recovered quickly and slid it onto my third finger. It felt heavy and foreign. . . but so amazing and so right.

"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the. . . ."

I don't know who moved first, but it didn't matter. My hands were on the side of her head, my lips against her soft, slightly sticky ones. The tips of our tongues touched gently and that was all it took. I wrapped one arm around her waist and dipped her, devouring her as cat calls and whistles rang out.

"Dat's yucky," I heard Charlie's little voice say, before scampering away.

Bella clutched at my shoulders and started laughing.

I pulled her back up and waggled my eyebrows at her playfully.

"Did we just get married?" she asked, pulling at her dress to make sure she wasn't exposed.

"I believe we did," I chuckled.

"Holy shit."

She grimaced, realizing that the minister was still standing within ear shot. "Whoops," she shrugged.

"Ladies and gentleman," he said loudly. "I'd like to introduce you to Mr. and Mrs. Edward Cullen."

BPOV

There weren't any real formal pictures. One of Jasper's friends, George, was taking them during the ceremony. It was then that I realized that we had never used the gift certificate that Jasper had given me for formal photographs.

"It's okay," George laughed. "You've got the credit for however long you want it."

We managed to get one of the entire family and then, we were good.

Everyone was filing out the back of the observatory. In all the times we had been there, not once had I ever gone out to the garden. In fact, I really didn't know that there was one. When I walked outside, I was once again taken aback. There was a large tent set up with about ten tables.

Edward had gone all out. There were flowers everywhere. In one corner of the tent was a table with a simple three tiered white cake that was covered in red carnations.

"They're edible," Edward whispered as I stared at them.

"What?"

"The flowers. They're made of sugar."

I looked closely. "No way!"

He laughed. "They are." He looked around and then snagged one of them from the backside of the cake and held it up to my mouth. "Taste."

"Edward!"

"Just taste."

I stuck out my tongue hesitantly. It tasted like. . . .sugar.

"See?" he laughed.

I was about to answer when I heard a familiar female voice. I turned around, squealing as I spotted Chelsea and Brian coming towards me.

"Oh my God! Have you guys been here the whole time?"

"No," Chelsea laughed. "We snuck in just before the ceremony."

"When did he. . ."

"He called a couple of months ago and told us what he was planning. We wouldn't have missed it for the world," she answered.

I turned my head to see Edward and Brian laughing and bumping their fists.

"I heard about everything that happened," Chelsea said, biting her nail.

I knew what she was doing. She was giving me an opening to talk if I needed to.

"Yeah," I said quietly. "It was a nightmare, but it's over."

She nodded and left it alone.

"So you guys are going to be close. I'm so excited. Seriously, it's only like four hours to the city, we can come down any time. Maybe even babysit?" She looked at me hopefully.

I hadn't thought about that. I would completely trust Chelsea and Brian with Charlie.

We chatted for a few more minutes before I was called away.

"Bella?" Edward called.

"Hey, baby," I grinned.

He kissed me softly and darted his eyes upwards. I followed his gaze to see what he was looking at and my heart stumbled. Standing at one of the tables was Riley with Lizzie right next to him. They were chatting with Alice, smiles on their faces. In his arms was Charlie.

"Did you do that?" I asked stupidly.

Of course he did. He planned this whole thing.

"You deserved to have all your loved ones here today, Bella. I can suck up my pride for one day. And he wanted to be here for you."

I lifted myself up on my toes and grabbed his chin. He pressed his forehead against mine. "You are something else, Edward Cullen."

"Something good?"

"Something very good," I said reverently. "You have no idea how much this means to me."

I could feel the burn in my chest, the pressure of emotion that I was trying to hold back. I never had any doubt that he loved me, but for him to extend any sort of olive branch to Riley, cemented the confirmation of just how much.

We chatted and laughed, ate and drank. There were no speeches or typical wedding formalities. We didn't need them. Our first dance was done with Charlie in between us; giggling as Edward tickled his ribs and blew raspberries against his cheek.

"Are you a Cuwen now too, Mommy?" He asked. "I mean, a CuLLen."

"Yes, baby, I'm a Cullen now too, baby. Isn't that cool?"

"Uh huh."

"Weeeeell," Edward sucked in a breath. "Legally, we still have to file the paperwork, but in every other sense, you're mine."

"I've always been yours," I said, kissing his mouth.

Charlie wrinkled his nose, causing both Edward and I to plant wet kisses on either side of his face.

I danced with my father and with Carlisle, with Jake and with Emmett and Jasper. Edward danced with Esme, Mrs. Jane, Alice and even Rose. Then we found our way back to each other. I nuzzled in close and stayed there for two songs until I felt Edward tense minutely as a throat cleared.

"May I?"

I looked up to see Riley standing next to me with his arm around Lizzie's waist.

Edward glanced at me and then back at Riley, nodding. "If I may as well."

Riley glanced at a blushing Lizzie and laughed. Edward held out his hand and she took it.

"You look beautiful," Riley whispered as we began to dance.

"Thank you."

"I don't think I've ever seen you this happy."

"I'm not sure I have ever been this happy before," I admitted. "I mean, the day Charlie was born was the best day of my life, but there was so much I was missing. Now, I have everything."

We danced silently for a while, but curiosity got the better of me.

"Are you happy?"

Riley pulled back a little and looked me straight in the eyes.

"Yeah. . . I am. More than I thought I would be. She's amazing." He looked over to where Edward was twirling Lizzie around. They were laughing. Riley smiled.

"Good," I sighed. "That's all I wanted for you."

He pulled me to him and hugged me tightly.

"I do love you, Bella. I always will. It's different now, but. . . it's better. And I have to admit. . . he's not too bad. As much as I've tried to hate him, I just can't."

I squeezed him back and we pulled away as the song ended. "I love you too, Ri."

Riley went to claim Lizzie from Edward and they nodded at each other politely before Edward returned to me.

I cupped his jaw with my hands and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. "Thank you for that."

"Anything for you, baby," he murmured, his hand sliding over my butt and squeezing. I jumped and slapped his hand away with a giggle.

We decided to cut the cake when we caught Charlie dipping his fingers in the icing for the third time.

After a few more dances, we realized how late it was getting. It was time to start preparing ourselves to leave.

Our guests began heading out; wishing us all the happiness in the world and so on and so forth.

Riley and Lizzie left quietly, simply waving, followed by Jake and Claire, who had been married in a small courthouse ceremony in early May.

Soon, it was only the family left. Our car was loaded with everything that we would need for our road trip and since Edward had requested no gifts for the wedding, we didn't have to worry about those.

Everyone gathered outside to see us off.

Charlie hugged everyone, even baby Avery, before making his way to the grandparents.

My dad picked Charlie up. "I'm gonna miss you, big man," he said gruffly.

"I miss you too, Grampa," Charlie said, tugging at Dad's mustache.

"You're going to be good for your mommy, right?"

Charlie nodded.

"And your daddy too?"

Charlie nodded again.

My dad wrapped his arms around my son and held him close. He closed his eyes and I heard him sniff, but when he opened them again, he smiled.

He handed Charlie over to Carlisle. "You've got the camera I gave you?" Carlisle asked.

"It's in my backpack, Papa" Charlie told him.

"You're going to take lots and lots of pictures of your trip?"

"Uh huh."

Carlisle tapped his cheek and Charlie puckered up, giving him a big fat kiss.

Esme was already sobbing.

"Are you sad, Gramma?" Charlie asked, furrowing his brow.

"I am, sweetheart," she answered with a smile.

"How come?"

"Because I'm going to miss you so very much."

Charlie put his hand on her cheek. "I'm coming back."

Esme hiccoughed and nodded. "I know, baby boy. I know."

I could no longer hold myself together. I let out a shuddering sob. It wasn't loud, but Edward heard it. He wrapped his arm around me and kissed the side of my head.

"Hang in there, baby," he murmured.

"I'll see you soon, okay, sweetheart?" Esme whimpered.

"Okay, Gramma," he grinned, hugging her tightly.

She set him down and he ran over to me, hugging my leg.

"You ready to go?"

I shook my head no as he let me go to pick Charlie up and put him in the car.

I made my rounds. Hugging everyone myself, kissing baby Avery, and getting swallowed in Emmett's arms. Jasper kissed my hand and drew me into a comfortable embrace. Alice clung to me with everything she had, crying loudly and begging me to call her every day.

Carlisle wrapped me up in his arms and kissed my forehead. "You call if you need anything, okay?"

I nodded, too afraid to talk.

Esme pulled me into her arms. "You are my daughter," she whispered. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," I squeaked.

"You take care of my boys," she made me promise.

"I will," I sniffle-laughed.

When Esme let me go I almost lost it. I could barely look at my father.

I could feel my lips trembling. He held out his arms for me and I collapsed into him.

"Daddy," I whimpered.

"My baby girl." He held me so tight I could barely breathe, but I didn't care. "What am I going to do without you?"

I sobbed, and sniffled. "You need to find yourself a good woman," I laughed.

"I'll work on that," he chuckled.

I continued to hold onto him.

"I am so proud of you, sweetheart. Please be careful."

"I will, Daddy."

I felt Edward behind me. He put his hand on my shoulder and I was finally able to let go of my dad.

Edward reached out his hand. "Chief."

My dad smiled. "Son."

They held their stance for a moment before my dad pulled him into one of those man hugs. "Take care of my kids," he mumbled.

"You know I will," Edward grinned.

I backed up towards the car and watched as Edward said goodbye to the rest of his family. He was doing well, but I could see the emotion in his eyes when he joined me, holding the door open and then climbing in himself.

As we drove away, I didn't turn around, but not because I didn't want to. I just figured, right now, it was better to look forward than to look back.

EPOV

We drove in silence until we hit the ferry. Charlie had fallen asleep so we stayed in the car. I pushed my seat back a little and Bella crawled onto my lap and snuggled down.

"Did we really just get married?" she asked.

"How many times are you going to ask me that?" I chuckled.

"As many times as it takes to sink in."

I worried for a minute that she had only done it because I had set it all up.

"Bella?" I asked, without really asking.

She lifted her head and pressed her lips securely against mine, pecking a few times.

"I wanted it so much, baby," she whispered. "There is nothing that makes me happier than becoming Mrs. Edward Cullen."

I let out a breath in relief. I loved hearing that. After all those times I let it slip that she was my wife. She finally was.

"How are we going to have a wedding night?" She asked, looking back at Charlie.

"I got us a suite," I smirked. "Two bedrooms. And once we're all settled in New York, my parents are coming out to look after Charlie for two weeks while we go on our honeymoon."

Her head whipped up so fast I had to pull away or risk getting hit in the nose.

"Honeymoon?" She sounded excited.

"Yeah, isn't that part of getting married," I joked.

"Where?"

"Hmmm, I was thinking about letting it be a surprise."

She scowled at me. "I think I've had enough surprises, Mr. Cullen."

"Even if they're good ones?"

"Even if they're good ones."

"We're going to Greece. Athens, Santorini, and Mykonos to be exact."

Bella stared at me. "Are you fucking kidding me?" she swore.

"Uh. . . no?"

Bella looked into the back seat and then straddled my lap. I grunted. "Bella?"

"Chill out, I'm not gonna do anything," she giggled. "I can wait another hour or so. I just wanna make out with my sweet, sexy husband for a little while."

"Oh, I like the sound of that. I. . . I can handle that," I moaned as she kissed my jaw. "Fuck. I think."

We continued to maul each other until the ferry pulled in to the Seattle port. Bella jumped back into her seat leaving me with the Godfather of all hard-ons. There was absolutely no way to adjust myself into a more comfortable position. We drove off the ferry and onto the dock, making our way to the hotel.

We woke Charlie up when we got there. We wanted him to know exactly where he was going to sleep and where we were if he needed us. It meant that we had to lay with him for about an hour, reading to him and talking about our trip and where we were going, but it was worth it to know that he was comfortable. We plugged the baby monitor in as well. . . just in case.

I led Bella back to the master bedroom. We had both changed out of our dress clothes when we first got to our suite, before putting Charlie back to bed. She was wearing sleep shorts and a tank and I was wearing flannel pants and a t-shirt, but it took mere seconds for us both to be naked.

She stood in front of me; the picture of perfection; the mother of my child and hopefully several more. My wife. I raked my eyes over her body. I knew every freckle, every scar, every stretch mark on her body and yet it was like I was looking at her for the first time.

I towered over her, watching her eyes flutter closed as I pushed her hair behind her back and kissed her shoulder.

She moaned as I trailed my fingers over her breasts, drawing circles around her hardening nipples. I peppered her neck and her face with lazy kisses before kneeling in front of her. My hands slid down her spine and over her backside resting just beneath the curve of her ass. I rested my cheek against her navel, while her hands wove through my hair.

After a few more moments of me doing nothing but holding her, worshipping her, she put her hands on my shoulders urging me upwards.

"I need you," she murmured. "I want you."

"You have me," I responded capturing her lips in a searing kiss. Our tongues collided fervently and I started to walk us backwards.

When we got to the bed, I bent down, yanking the comforter to the end of the bed, exposing the silky sheets. I helped her lie back and crawled on top of her.

"My beautiful wife."

"My beautiful husband," she smiled.

My throbbing erection was pressed against her stomach. I needed to be inside of her.

I slid down a little, positioning myself at her opening and then looking up into her eyes. She was waiting for me. She lifted herself up onto her forearms and we watched together as I pushed into her slowly.

"Oh shit, baby. You feel so fucking amazing." I moaned. "God, I never. . .you. It's always been you." I couldn't get my thoughts together enough to tell her what I was trying to say. But the fire in her eyes told me she understood. Apparently she couldn't talk properly either.

"Ugh," Bella mewled. "Ah. . . oh."

She let herself fall back onto the bed, her arms above her head. I moved inside of her purposefully, trying to hit all those spots I knew of and maybe a few that I had yet to discover. I reached up and held both of her wrists in one hand so I could keep her from flailing. The other I used to wrap one of her legs around my back.

Her hips rose to meet mine as we sped up, faster and faster until I was exploding and she was shattering and we were a mess of sweat soaked skin and tangled limbs.

I collapsed on top of her, my face pressed into her hair; lavender and vanilla.

If I hadn't been worried that I was going to crush her, I would have stayed that way all night. Instead, I rolled over and pulled her on top of me so that she was resting in the crook of my arm.

I closed my eyes, feeling her lips pressed against my chest.

"I love you, Isabella Cullen," I murmured against her neck.

"So much," she sighed.

It had been almost exactly a year since the day that my life changed irrevocably. The day that I found out that the love of my life had given me the most precious gift that any woman could ever give a man. A gift I was foolish and naive enough to think I wanted no part of. We had been to hell and back, but we were stronger for it. And as we took the next step towards our future, I knew that there was nothing that could ever tear us apart. We were a family. . . as we were always meant to be.

XXXXXX

**AN: I have no idea if I was supposed to say "the end" yet. There will be an epilogue coming as well as at least one more outtake (Vail...Tequila...you see what I'm getting at, right?) **

**If there's something else you want to see, let me know now or after the epilogue, either way. I like writing the outtakes so if there's a lot of interest, I'll definitley see what I can do.**

**Props to *mcamastow, who called it that Edward was planning a wedding. LOL. I'm sure there were others too, and there were several who I think suspected. **

**The song Running on Sunshine is by Jesus Jackson. I fell in love with it after watching the Grey's Anatomy musical episode. Thought it was perfect for these two. Cheesy...Absolutely. But fun. **

**There's all sorts of links on my profile page for the rings, Bella's dress and the music video from the GA episode.**

**I'm gonna save the sap for the epi. **


	40. Epilogue part 1:

**AN: So, so sorry. I wrote it and it sucked, so I sort of re-wrote it. Gah. Just sorry.**

**I haven't responded to reviews not b/c I don't appreciate them, but b/c the url is down and I couldn't PM everyone. I WILL answer every single review for the epi, but if you don't have your Personal Message function turned on, I won't be able to respond. **

**Quick thanx to Mollie, Mel, and Lexie for beta'ing and pre-reading more than once. :oD **

**PLEASE READ: This chapter ended up too big to post all at once. I will be posting it in two sections. I'm still working on a small bit of the second section so it will be up probably later today. Please don't hate on me. LOL.**

**Just like the rest of the story, this is a a rollercoaster. **

**XXXXXXX**

Epilogue: Part 1:

EPOV

"Charles Anthony Cullen!"

"Whaaaaat?"

"What do you mean, what?"

_Uh oh. She sounds frustrated._

I left my open suitcase on the bed and walked out into the hallway to see my wife standing with her hands on her hips outside of our son's bedroom.

He was walking slowly down the hallway, not even looking at where he was going. Instead, his eyes were focused on his Nintendo DS. His fingers moving wildly over the controls and his face contorting in all sorts of interesting ways.

"Charlie?" Bella said calmly. She was giving him a chance to stay out of trouble.

He didn't answer. She looked at me incredulously. I pursed my lips together, determined to stay out of the pending argument.

"Charlie!"

His head snapped up. "What?"

Bella's hand waved towards his bedroom. "What is this?"

He looked in to his room and then back at Bella. "It's my room?" He said with a 'well duh' expression on his face.

I coughed into my hand to hide my snicker, but she heard me anyway. Oops.

_Yes, darling. Our son is a smartass. And yes, he got it from me._

"And you don't see anything wrong with this picture?"

His eyes told her that he didn't. And then they flickered back down to his DS.

Bella snatched it from his hands, closing the lid. "No more DS until that room is clean."

"But. . ."

_Too late, son._

"Charlie, we have the movers coming tomorrow morning. There is no way they are going to be able to navigate through your room looking like that."

Charlie's mouth was open. He was about to protest, but he caught my eye and I shook my head, warning him.

His room really was a shithole. Clothes strewn about, his legos and tech decks were all over. His keyboard and the surrounding floor were covered in paper. He had been trying to compose a song and it was obvious he was a perfectionist. Again, just like me. It frustrated him to no end that his songs didn't sound like mine. I reminded him that I'd been playing for nearly twenty-five years and that most eight year olds didn't have half the ability that he did, but he wasn't appeased by that at all.

"Daaaad," he whined almost silently as Bella walked away.

"Dude, your mom is tired and cranky and she's been telling you for three days to clean your room before the movers get here. No sympathy." I shrugged.

I heard him huffing as he stomped loudly into his room, trying to make it very clear that he wasn't happy.

I followed my wife to the kitchen. She was standing at the kitchen sink looking out the front window.

"Hey," I whispered in her ear, sliding my arms around her.

"What are we doing?" she sighed with a slight whimper.

"I don't know, what are we doing?"

I knew what she was asking, but obviously she needed to talk about it.

She turned in my arms and I stepped back a little. She looked tired. The last couple of weeks had been really hard on her.

I sighed and pulled her back into my arms, pressing my lips to her forehead.

"Do you want to stay? Is that what you're trying to tell me? The movers haven't come yet. I can still change my placement."

She shook her head. "No. I don't want to stay. I mean, a part of me does, but I'm ready to go home."

We'd been in New York City for almost four years. Four very long and very complicated years. So much had changed for us.

Despite being told what to expect from my father and hearing at orientation how difficult the process would be, I went into my first year of medical school like the cocky bastard I was thinking I would survive. I almost didn't; we almost didn't.

I had always relied on book smarts to get me through high school and undergrad. Testing was easy because there was usually just one right answer. And when it came down to simple memorization in things like anatomy and molecular mechanism, I was fine. But when we started talking about practical application, I got nervous. I was afraid of being wrong, even though we weren't working with actual patients yet. The feeling was new to me and it sucked.

Bella was amazingly patient with me, even when I was pulling out my hair and yelling at her because "she couldn't possibly understand". But somehow she didn't need to. She always managed to bring me back down one way or another. She was my rock and as sappy as it sounds, at the end of the day there was no place I'd rather be than curled up in her arms.

After taking her GRE and applying for the masters program at Teacher's College, Bella decided to get a part-time job at a substance abuse clinic in Brooklyn. Her job consisted of helping their clients find jobs and community resources. It was pretty basic, but she loved it and every day when I got home from school, she greeted me with a happy smile and an enthusiastic kiss. I certainly couldn't complain about that welcome home.

But the further into the semester I got, the more intense my studies became and the more time I started spending away from home. I tried really hard, but there were days that I didn't see Bella and Charlie at all. I would have to be up and out by six a.m. and not get home until well after midnight. I hated those days. I missed my happy smiles and enthusiastic kisses. I think Bella did too.

We weren't the only ones feeling the stress. On the weekends, Charlie started throwing temper tantrums anytime I tried to go anywhere without him; even to the bathroom. Of course I realized that there was an issue, but there wasn't anything I could do about it. He had gotten so used to me being around all of the time that the abrupt schedule change was bound to have an effect.

One morning when I'd actually been able to join them for breakfast, I realized just how bad it had gotten.

Bella handed me my coffee in a travel mug as I shoved a bagel into my mouth. I stood up after only five minutes of "family time" and grabbed my coat.

_After kissing my tired looking wife, I made my way over to Charlie. He wrapped his little arms around my neck, but when I pulled back, he didn't let go._

_"Daddy, don't go," he pleaded, his voice small and sad._

_I winced and gritted my teeth together in frustration. What I wouldn't have given just to be able to say okay._

_Instead, I sighed. "I have to go, buddy. I'm sorry."_

_I turned to see Bella, but she wasn't looking at me. She was looking down at her own mug. It was Friday, Charlie didn't have school and Bella didn't work. It was the day that she had designated to take him to different parts of the city. It was the day I had gross anatomy lab that I absolutely could not miss._

_"Bella?" I called, trying unsuccessfully to set my son back on the floor._

_Without a word she put down her coffee and pried Charlie's arms and legs from around me._

_It wasn't the first time he had done that, but it was the first time he had given up the fight so quickly and without tears. He simply transferred his grip to Bella. I noticed immediately and it hurt. It hurt a lot, but I pushed it back._

_"I'm sorry," I mouthed morosely, as I headed towards the door._

_Bella gave me a small smile and waved me off. I felt like shit. It took everything I had to put one foot in front of the other and not turn back, but I did it, because I had to._

_I was actually able to get home earlier that night. A few of my classmates had invited me out for drinks, but I turned them down. As much as I wanted to go out and have a drink and just relax for a little bit, I needed to get home to my family._

_I thought that maybe, since it was Friday, Charlie would still be up when I walked through the door at eight, but much to my disappointment, he was already asleep._

_"Hey, baby," I mumbled, setting my things down on the kitchen counter top._

_Bella was curled up underneath a blanket on the sofa reading a book. She glanced up and set her book down on the coffee table._

_"You're home early," she sighed._

_"Not early enough," I shrugged dejectedly._

_She motioned for me to join her and I did, falling over so that my head was in her lap._

_"He had a busy day. He tried to stay up, but I finally made him go to bed when he couldn't keep his eyes open anymore."_

_"Well, if I didn't feel like a horrible dad before, I certainly do now," I grumbled._

_"You're not a horrible dad, Edward," she soothed._

_"Tell me this will all be okay," I begged._

_"It'll all be okay," she whispered, running her hands through my hair._

_"Do you believe that?"_

_She took a deep breath before answering._

_"Yes, I do."_

_I could hear in her voice that she was forcing it, but I was afraid that if I asked her again, she'd change her answer. I needed everything to be okay. I needed to believe that it would all be worth it in the end._

_"This isn't fair to him," I murmured._

_"We knew this was not going to be easy. He'll be okay. Let's just make it to Christmas and then we'll have two full weeks together._

_"Two weeks isn't very long."_

_"But it's all we've got right now, so let's look forward to it and make sure we take advantage."_

She was right, of course. There wasn't a whole lot we could do. This was the path we had chosen and I was pretty sure that it was the right choice. We were strong and had been through worse. I knew that the spring semester was going to be just as hard if not harder on us, but I tried not to think about it. Instead I was determined to focus all of my energy on the two people I loved the most.

Fall Semester ended a few days before Christmas. We flew back to Washington to spend the holiday with our family and you would have thought that we'd been gone for years.

When we first got home, Bella and my mom spent a good ten minutes in a tight hug. Alice squealed so loud I was pretty sure my eardrum had burst. Rose brought Avery over practically every day to 'play' with Charlie. He was entertained for about twenty minutes by trying to make her laugh and chasing after her as she crawled around, but then he got bored and decided to do 'big boy' things.

Chief Swan spent all his free time at my parent's house either playing with Charlie or shooting the shit with my dad and I. I could tell that he missed Bella and Charlie more than he was willing to admit by the way his eyes would get sad when he looked at them. It was usually only a flash, but I saw it. It was a feeling I knew all too well. . . and they were with me.

Jasper and Alice were married December 29th. It was the antithesis of our wedding. Big and lavish. Emmett and I sat back laughing and drinking beer at the reception as we analyzed all of the hats that Jasper's female relatives were wearing. I'd forgotten how much I missed my brother and his laid back attitude. And motherhood seemed to have tamed Rose as well. She was still snarky and quick witted, but in a much more playful way.

I spent every waking moment that I could with Charlie and Bella. It was just like old times. Luckily, my parents didn't go overboard with the gifts, because there would have been no way that we could have carried a whole bunch of shit back with us.

I tried to set aside any and all thoughts of medical school and classes. It wasn't easy, but my family deserved to have me with them. I loved it, but it made me realize just how much I had been neglecting them.

Before we knew it, it was time to head back east. We avoided the big goodbye scene by saying goodnight and then leaving very early in the morning. I didn't think any of us could survive doing that again. Still, Bella and her dad held onto each other a little longer and a little tighter than a normal goodnight; and my mother cried.

As I suspected, things didn't get any better during spring semester. If anything, they got worse, but Bella held me together. I worried what would happen when she started her studies. She had received her acceptance letter from Teacher's College and would be going full time starting in the fall.

As it was, we already didn't get much time for just the two of us. Brian and Chelsea tried to come down about once a month and stayed the night with Charlie so we could have a date night. Sometimes we simply went out for dinner and a movie before returning home to hang out with our friends, but we usually ended up staying in a hotel for the night. It was such a novelty being able to just fall asleep naked after having sex instead of putting on our pajamas just in case we had a little visitor. I loved the feel of Bella's skin against mine all night.

The summer break was much better. We got a full nine weeks off and we spent eight of them back home in Washington.

Avery was a year old and was a little spitfire. She looked a lot like Rose with her light blond hair and blue eyes, but she had Emmett's dimples. They were going to be in so much trouble when she got older. I made sure to remind my brother of that every chance I got. She had just started walking and looked like a little baby Frankenstein. I was completely enamored, as was Charlie.

_"Is Avery my sister?" he asked one night after we had spent the entire day with them._

_"No, Charlie, Avery is your cousin," I told him._

_"Can Avery be my sister?"_

_Bella laughed._

_"No, sweetie. Avery will always be your cousin. She's Uncle Emmie and Auntie Rose's baby."_

_"Can we get a baby?" he asked with all the innocence of a five year old._

_"Good question," I said under my breath. I'd like to say that it wasn't my intention for Bella to hear me, but it was. Seeing my brother interact with his baby girl made me think about how much I wanted that._

_We hadn't talked about having another baby yet. Not really. I'd brought it up a few times randomly, but Bella usually rolled her eyes. She didn't even have to remind me that I barely had time enough for them as it was. And she was about to start grad school. Much to my chagrin, it wasn't happening anytime soon._

_"Maybe someday, Charlie," Bella said while staring at me. I smiled sheepishly and turned my focus back to my son._

I couldn't have asked for more out of that summer vacation. It was filled with park trips and barbecues. Chief Swan and Carlisle took Charlie and me on an overnight fishing trip too. After a year spent in New York City, the sounds the wild life and bugs made at night freaked Charlie out. He refused to be in our tent by himself and instead fell asleep in Chief Swan's arms while we sat drinking beer and talking by the fire; bonding as men do or some shit like that.

The highlight, however, had to be when my parents bought Charlie a bike and I taught him how to ride it without training wheels. I'd never forget the look on his face when he realized I wasn't holding onto him anymore or the tears that followed when he fell off and busted open his knee on the gravel. I was torn between comforting him and encouraging him to get right back up and do it again. So I cleaned and bandaged his wound, gave it a kiss, and watched as he climbed back onto his bike proud as a motherfucking peacock.

The monster play set was still a huge hit and the three of us spent a lot of mornings running circles around each other. My favorite part was hearing Bella and Charlie laugh. I'd do anything they asked just to hear that sound. The summer was full of it.

It's amazing how you tend to lose sight of the little things when your focus is on the bigger picture.

Returning to New York held a mixture of feelings. The night before we were to begin classes, Bella and I spent wrapped up in each other. I don't know how many times we made love. It seemed like I spent the entire night inside of her and yet it wasn't enough. There was so much anxiety and nervous anticipation about what was going to happen to us as a couple and as a family. Neither one of us knew what to expect and we were afraid to let go.

In the beginning, my second year of medical school didn't feel as intense. The fall semester curriculum was similar to what I had been doing and I seemed to have overcome my fear of being wrong. No one ever laughed at my answers or made me feel inadequate. We were all in the same boat and sometimes being wrong was the best way to learn.

I was usually home for dinner, even if I had to go back out again and I was always there for breakfast in the morning.

We had put Charlie into Kindergarten at a private school that was within walking distance of the apartment. He was thriving in his new environment and picked up reading faster than most of his classmates. We also made sure to put him in piano lessons because his tinkering was no longer sufficient and I just didn't have the time to work with him. When Bella first brought it up, I got angry.

The piano was the one thing that had bonded us from the beginning. The one thing that I could give him that no one else could. But I couldn't. Not the way he needed me to. It really fucking hurt.

I didn't want anyone else to teach him, but I didn't want him to suffer or get set back because of me. Reluctantly, I agreed, but not before interviewing over twenty prospective teachers. We ended up choosing an older gentleman who had taught at Juilliard for thirty years and had since retired. He cost a fucking arm and a leg, but if I couldn't teach my son, I was going to make damn sure that only the best did.

Bella was a natural when it came to school. She studied all the time, but it paid off. There were a few times when we both needed to be out for study groups or projects and we fought quite a bit over it.

_"Why is it that your education always comes first, Edward?" she yelled._

_"It doesn't. But I can't miss this session."_

_"Well I can't miss mine either."_

_"Can't you move it here?" I asked widening my arms to indicate the apartment._

_"You know what? Forget it. I'll just take my chances. You go and do what you need to do," she huffed. "You always do anyway so why should it matter what I need?"_

_I rolled my eyes which only pissed her off more. There was no point in talking to her when she was like that. I walked out of the apartment, slamming the door behind me._

_When I got home a little after midnight, she was waiting for me at the table. I sat down next to her and picked up her hand, kissing her knuckles._

_"I shouldn't have just left," I admitted. "You're education is just as important as mine and I know it's not easy. Did you miss your session entirely?"_

_"I Skyped with them, so no, but we need to hire a babysitter," she said softly. "I don't want to fight about this anymore."_

_"Okay," I agreed. "Whatever we need to do."_

Hiring a babysitter was a lot fucking harder than either one of us expected it to be. After having our child snatched from us, trusting people didn't come easy. Charlie didn't seem to remember the incident at all, but we did.

We found one girl, Hailey, an undergrad at Columbia who seemed to be a perfect fit. She was intelligent, ambitious, and had glowing recommendations. She was studying English and comparative literature, and had a job at the on-campus library, but was looking for some extra spending money. She seemed shy and didn't really talk much, but Charlie loved her.

Bella was usually the one to deal with her since she usually got home before I did, but the one time I was home first I got the surprise of my life. When I opened the door I could hear her crying. My first instinct was to immediately ask about Charlie, but when she assured me he was fine, my attention turned to her.

_"Are you okay? What happened?"_

_She was staring down at her phone._

_"I. . . uh. . I just got some bad news," she whimpered._

_I waited to see if she was going to elaborate, but she didn't._

_"Oh," I said awkwardly. "I'm sorry. Is there anything that. . .uh. . . that you need?_

_She looked up at me and then stood. "Yeah, there is."_

_She took a step towards me. I was beginning to get nervous. I should have heeded the warning. The next thing I knew she was in front of me, her hands on my waist._

_I had no fucking clue what to do. I pushed her away gently._

_"Look, Hailey. I. . .I know you're upset, but this is not okay. . .I'm married and I love my wife. . . a lot. I think you should go home; maybe call a friend."_

_I tried not to touch her at all because I was worried how it could be misconstrued, but she stepped forward again and reached out for me. I was in a near state of panic when Bella cleared her throat from the doorway._

_She was standing with her hand on her hip, her head tilted and her face expressionless. It was her eyes that told me just how pissed off she was. They were slightly narrowed and her icy stare made me actually want to shrink into myself. I had no idea how long she had been standing there, but I could only hope to God she didn't think I had actually encouraged it._

_Hailey's hand was on my chest, but she whipped it back when she realized she had been caught. I say 'she' had been caught, because I wasn't doing anything._

_"Bella, baby, this isn't what it looks like," I pleaded, backing away from Hailey and moving towards my wife._

_She flashed her eyes to me for the briefest of moments before they focused back on the petrified girl on the other side of the room._

_"Do you need a ride home or can you manage on your own?" Bella said coldly._

_Hailey swallowed and moved towards the front door, giving Bella a wide berth. I didn't blame her. Bella was barely controlling her fury and it was obvious._

_"I. . .uh. . . I . . can find my way home, Mrs. Cullen. I'm really sorry."_

_"I'm sure you are," Bella sneered. "Now get the fuck out of my house."_

_Hailey lowered her eyes and then bolted milliseconds before Bella slammed the door on her._

_"Bella. . ." I said cautiously._

_"I've been standing here long enough to know what happened, Edward."_

_"I'm sorry. I didn't realize. . ."_

_"It's fine. I'll start looking for another babysitter in the morning," she sighed heavily. "An older one."_

_I let out a long, heavy breath in relief. Bella grabbed the front of my shirt and pulled me down towards her, smashing her lips into mine in a rough, possessive kiss. I was surprised at first, it was usually me that needed the reassurance. After a very brief moment I responded and we crashed backwards into the cabinets. She left me panting and breathless._

_"You are mine," she growled. "Remember that." She turned and started to make her way back to our bedroom. I couldn't follow her fast enough._

Our next babysitter was Mrs. Driver, a woman who lived down the hallway. She had grandchildren who were just a few years older than Charlie and she was thrilled to have the extra income. Charlie loved her because she made him cookies. I think she reminded him of my mom, even though she was quite a bit older. It was comforting for all of us to have her care for him.

Again we tried to make the most of our Christmas break. I was getting ready to start my major clinical year and no matter how hard I tried to relax, I was freaked the fuck out. My whole family could feel the tension rolling off of me and subsequently Bella. I spent most nights sitting in Carlisle's office with him as he tried to calm my nerves.

Life went on. We woke up, we studied, we ate, we studied, we went to sleep, we studied. We had sex, although not nearly as often as I would have liked, and we studied some more.

In the spring, Alice and Jasper showed up on our doorstep with a very specific purpose. Alice was pregnant and they wanted us to be the first people they told. Not only that, they wanted us to be the Godparents. It was a really nice surprise and their unexpected visit slowed things down for the five short days they were there.

Bella and I were both absolutely thrilled for them. Jasper was pretty excited, not that I could blame him. We celebrated with a strong whiskey and a couple of cigars. I had to admit, I was a little jealous, but I never let them know that.

Alice had to buy two extra suitcases after shopping in all the baby boutiques and she also ordered a custom made mahogany crib to be shipped home to them. Bella made me swear that when we had another baby that I would not spend five grand on a fucking crib. I would have promised her anything, I was just so fucking happy that she had even brought up the idea of having another baby someday.

Towards the end of the semester, my mother came out to help Bella while she studied for her finals and finished up some papers. Mrs. Driver just couldn't keep up with the kind of hours we needed. It was then that I took the chance to discuss with Bella something that I had known since the beginning of the year.

_"I've only got three weeks between my Primary Care and OB rotation this summer, Bella," I said as we were grabbing a coffee on our own one morning._

_"Okay," she said, confused as to where I was going._

_"I was thinking maybe we should stay in the city this summer."_

_Bella raised her eyebrows at me and I could tell immediately she didn't like the idea._

_"Okay," I sighed. "Well what would your solution be?"_

_She sipped her coffee and picked at her muffin for a few minutes before finally answering._

_"Why don't. . . .we all go home for the few weeks that you have off and then Charlie and I can stay for a few extra when you have to come back?"_

_I didn't like the idea. The thought of coming home to an empty apartment made me uneasy. But she was right. I wouldn't be around much and it wasn't fair to make them miss out on their summer vacation._

_I put my arm around her and buried my nose in her hair. I loved to breathe her in. It was always so comforting._

I reluctantly agreed. I hated being there without them. I hated knowing that they were three thousand miles away from me even if it was just for a few weeks. But in the end, I'm glad that we did it that way. OB was unpredictable and I was sometimes up and out in the middle of the night. I was rarely home and when I was, it was only to sleep.

A few weeks after they returned, Bella began her concentration year of grad school. She was not only taking classes, but also doing an internship at a mental health center.

That year, everything that we'd build nearly came tumbling down. We had been bickering and fighting constantly. On top of my clinicals, I was taking board prep review classes.

It wasn't entirely my fault. Bella was always gone as well. We didn't go out, we didn't have sex. Nothing. We just couldn't find the time or energy to put effort into our relationship anymore. I guess I didn't realize how bad it had gotten, but apparently Bella had, and she had had enough.

It was November. I went almost an entire week without seeing my family at all. I came home, but it was either to an empty house or to a sleeping family and I didn't want to disturb them. I thought I was being considerate. . . or maybe I just couldn't handle the looks on their faces anymore.

I loved Bella more than life itself, but I didn't know how to put us back together and I questioned whether or not she actually wanted me to. When we were together, she seemed so detached. It reminded me of how she was when I first found out about Charlie, except without the anger. It was actually the lack of emotion from her that scared me the most. I didn't want to face what was really going on, because it scared the shit out of me to think that we wouldn't be able to get back to who we were, so I continued to bury myself into my studies.

The final straw was when I missed Thanksgiving dinner. It wasn't intentional. Emmett, Rose and Avery were visiting. Rose was six months pregnant with their second baby, a boy. I hated to go in that morning, but I had to. My attending had said that assuming that everything was calm, I could go home just after our noon conference. But we had a really interesting case come in and I was asked if I wanted to be a part of the consultation. I thought I had time.

I heard my phone ring, but silenced it with the intention of checking it as soon as the consultation was over. Before I knew it, it was four o'clock and I had missed dinner.

When one of the nurses asked what I was still doing there I panicked. Part of me wanted to rush home while the other part of me wanted to hide in the break room for the rest of the night and just hope that by the time I got home, she wouldn't be angry.

_Bella was sitting on the sofa when I got there._

_"Bella," I whispered as I got in. I knew I was in trouble when she wouldn't look at me._

_"Emmett and Rose took the kids to Central Park. I think it would probably be best if you weren't here when they got back," she said flatly._

_"What?"_

_"Unless you want me and Charlie to leave."_

_"What. . . what are you talking about?" I asked, confused._

_She couldn't really mean that._

_"I can't do this anymore, Edward. I know that we've been busy and that I haven't exactly been attentive to you, but I just can't handle being completely disregarded."_

_"I'm not disregarding you," I protested._

_"Yes, you are. You have been for weeks, months even. Even when you're here, you're not. Mentally, you're at the hospital. I don't know if it's with the patients, the doctors or. . . the fucking nurses, but it's certainly not here with Charlie and me."_

_Aaaand there it was. She didn't even have to come right out and say it._

_"You think I'm having an affair?" I scoffed. "Really? After all these years and all the times I've proved to you that I love you and only you? That's fucking ridiculous, Bella and you know it."_

_She shook her head, tears starting to slip from the corners of her eyes._

_I sat down next to her and grabbed her chin. I needed to see her eyes and she needed to see mine. She had to believe that I was telling the truth._

_"Baby, please. You cannot believe that," I whispered. "You. . ." I let out a pained sort of chuckle to cover the fact that I had no more words and my breath hitched unexpectedly._

_I watched as her eyes softened a little, before she looked away from me._

_"Emmett and Rose came all the way out here to spend Thanksgiving with us. It was very awkward."_

_"You should have called me," I said hoarsely._

_"I did. I called you and left a voicemail at one-thirty. You didn't respond and dinner was ready to be put on the table."_

_The phone call I silenced. Shit._

_"I got asked to be a part of a really big consultation. I got distracted."_

_"Yeah," she sighed. "I understand. There's always some reason. Always some excuse for why you miss Charlie's school activities or piano recitals. That used to be something you loved and you've missed two already this year. Have you even heard him play? He's amazing. And you're missing it. It feels like we now come second to your. . . distractions."_

_I saw her lip tremble a little until she pulled it in between her teeth. I used to love it when she did that, but at that moment I hated it. I reached over and tugged, forcing her to release it._

_"Charlie and I expect things of you. I can't. . . count on you anymore and I need to be able to make other arrangements. I just think it would be best for us to get some space from each other. . ."_

_"You can count on me, Bella!" I interrupted loudly._

_She stood up and started walking away from me but I followed. She turned abruptly and I almost ran into her._

_"No I can't. We can't. Today was just one more example of how you're putting everything else before your family. I don't want to fight about this. We fight all the fucking time and I'm just tired of it. There is just too much," she cried._

_"I was called into Charlie's school last week. They asked me if there was something going on at home that would explain why his behavior had changed and his grades are slipping. I didn't know what to say."_

_"You didn't tell me."_

_"Yes, I did. You obviously weren't paying attention. As usual."_

_Ouch._

_"Something's gotta give. I cannot do it all. I need my husband. Charlie needs his father. I am trying to be a good mother. I am trying to be a good student."_

_"Can you take a break?" I interrupted again._

_"From what?" she snapped. "From parenthood? No. It doesn't work that way."_

_"From school? Just. . . until I'm done?"_

_She stared at me, her mouth agape, her eyes blinking incredulously. "You want me to drop out of school when I have one semester left?"_

_"I know it wouldn't solve all of our problems, but. . ."_

_"It wouldn't solve any of our problems," she said, her voice rising. "You've got another year and a half of medical school and then your internship and residency. How long, Edward? How long would I have to wait to finish up my last six months of school?"_

_She took a deep breath and I ran my hand through my hair agitatedly._

_"I can't fix this marriage by myself. I work while you're doing your clinicals and Charlie is at school. I'm home almost every night. Where are you?" she snapped. "You don't pick up your phone and you don't bother to check your messages when we leave one. Why can't you take a semester off?"_

_"I can't, Bella. I'm training with the best of the best. I can't just take a vacation. I'm trying to make our lives better!" I shouted._

_"Well you're doing a shitty job," she growled._

_"Thanks," I snapped. "Like you're doing such a fantastic job yourself."_

_The silence and tension that filled the room was so thick you could have cut it with a knife. I was afraid to say anything. Afraid that she'd already given up on me._

_"Just. . . I said I didn't want to fight, Edward."_

_My hands flew to my head and I gripped my hair as I realized exactly what was happening._

_"Please tell me we're not over, Bella." I could feel my heart aching at the thought. I couldn't lose her. She and Charlie were everything to me. How the fuck could I have let this happen?_

_I rubbed my hand over my chest and swallowed harshly as I watched her eyes._

_"I don't want us to be," she murmured through her tears. "I don't know, Edward. We just need a break. Time to figure things out; to figure us out."_

_She slipped her arms around my waist, pressing her face into my chest. I drew her to me, holding on for dear life._

_"Don't leave me," I whispered. "I can't live without you."_

_We stood there holding each other until Bella's cell phone rang. The kids were getting cold and were ready to come home. Rose wanted to make sure it was okay._

_"Can I stay?" I asked hopefully._

_Bella nodded. "Yeah. Until Charlie's in bed. I know he wanted to see you. He was worried when you didn't come home."_

_"Shit. I really fucked up, didn't I?"_

_Bella didn't answer my question._

_"There's leftovers in the fridge. Do you want me to heat them up for you?"_

_She went to move away from me, but I pulled her back. "Will you sit with me."_

_"Sure," she smiled lightly._

_We sat in silence, Bella drinking tea while I ate. It had probably been an amazing Thanksgiving dinner, but it was hard for me to taste anything. Our marriage was in pieces not because we didn't love each other, but because somewhere, somehow, we had just lost our way._

_When everyone else got back to the apartment, Charlie's face lit up as if he were surprised to see me. He jumped into my arms happily and instantly started chattering away about his day. I felt like a complete asshole._

_I half expected Rose to make a snide comment, but she didn't. She almost looked like she felt sorry for me. Emmett pretended that he had no idea that anything was wrong, even though it was obvious that there was._

_After Rose and Em left with Avery for the night, I made my way to Charlie's room. I was dreading telling him that I was leaving. He was too smart for his own good._

_"Hey, buddy," I said, sitting down on the edge of his bed._

_"Hi, Daddy."_

_"I've got something I need to talk to you about."_

_Charlie's eyes narrowed slightly. "Are you leaving?" he asked suddenly._

_I looked at him, startled that he had come to that conclusion already._

_"Sort of," I said. "I'm going to be staying somewhere else for a while, but I'll still be here." I cleared my throat trying not to let my son see me lose it._

_"Are you going to be living somewhere else forever?"_

_"No, Charlie! No."_

_"Cause Casey's dad said he was going to live somewhere else for a little while and he never came back."_

_Charlie started crying and I pulled him into my lap. I didn't care how big he was getting, he was still my little boy and at that moment he needed to know that I wasn't going to leave him. Ever._

_"Well, I'm not Casey's dad," I told him. "I'm coming back. I promise."_

_I really fucking hoped that I could keep that promise._

_After saying goodnight, I packed a bag. It took me longer than it should have. I kept hoping that Bella would come in and tell me stop. But she didn't. I was suddenly beginning to realize just how serious the situation had become. When I left, she was in the kitchen cleaning up._

_"I. . . do you want me to call and let you know where I am?"_

_She turned to face me, her eyes sad. "Yes, please. When you get a chance, that would be good."_

I checked into a hotel that night and had no idea how long to tell them I'd be there. The front desk clerk must have dealt with it before though cause he didn't question me, he simply booked me in and gave me my room key. I texted Bella instead of calling. It was late and I didn't know if she was sleeping. I also wasn't sure I could talk to her. I was too upset and I had no idea if that would manifest into tears or anger. I didn't want to take the chance.

I hated every square inch of that fucking place. Even though I hadn't actually been there much for the nightly routine and Bella and I hadn't curled up together in weeks, coming home to a cold and empty hotel room only emphasized what I was missing. I missed my wife. I missed my son. I missed who we were before we had let all the bullshit get in between us.

I met up with Rose and Emmett a couple days later for lunch before they made their way home. None of us acknowledged the elephant in the room. My wife had kicked me out and I was living out a suitcase in a hotel.

I spent almost an entire week attempting to figure out what to do. I did call home to talk to Charlie every day. Bella would answer the phone and we'd awkwardly make small talk before she put him on the line. I don't think either one of us was ready to delve into the issue, especially not over the phone or when Charlie was around.

I tried to focus on my work and studies, but Bella and Charlie invaded my every thought. I needed to put my family back together; immediately.

I checked out of the hotel, preparing to get down on my knees and beg Bella to let me come home, but when I got there, just before dinner, I never got the chance.

**XXXXX**

**AN: Obviously we're not done. Give me a few hours and the next section will be ready to go. I've always promised you an HEA, hang in there. **


	41. Epilogue part 2:

**AN: I'll get all mushy at the end. Nobody wants to read my AN note right now anyway. :oD**

**Might need tissues. Maybe. I don't know. :o/**

**XXXXX**

Epilogue part 2:

"Daaaaaaddy!" Charlie squealed, running towards me. I was able to drop my bag just before he jumped into my arms and nearly knocked me over. "Are you home? Forever?"

I looked up at Bella, who was setting the table for dinner. She smiled softly and pulled another plate out of the cabinet.

"I hope so, buddy."

He wiggled out of my grasp and ran towards his bedroom. "I got something to show you."

I swallowed and walked towards my wife. I stopped a few feet from her, waiting. She silently turned, grabbing the waistband of my jeans and pulling me to her. Her cheek pressed firmly against my chest and I could hear and feel the tremble in her breaths. She felt so good in my arms, I didn't want to release her, but we only had a moment's embrace before Charlie was back, chattering and waving a piece of paper. When I tried to let her go, she held on, her hands gripping my shirt tightly. I met her eyes and kissed her nose, smiling before I bent down to Charlie's level.

"What do you have there?" I asked.

"I made this for you, Daddy."

It was a card made of construction paper. It had three figures on it. One had a triangle dress on and long hair, one was bigger and was wearing pants and a shirt and in the middle holding the hands of the two bigger figures was a little one. It said:

**I LOVE YOU DADDY**

Even our six year old knew that we were not meant to be apart.

"I think this might be the best card I've ever gotten," I grinned, hugging him to me and taking a deep breath.

After dinner, we settled into the living room and Charlie spent the rest of the evening in my lap, telling me about his day at school and his friends. We played pirates while he took a bath and then he read to me from one of his reading books from school. I was really impressed at how good he actually was. I was thrilled when he asked me read to him and it didn't take long at all for my voice to lull him into sleep. I sat on the edge of his bed, just watching him breathe and trying to figure out what I was going to say to his mother.

When I left his room I noticed that Bella was no longer in the living room or kitchen. I wandered back to our bedroom. She was there, sitting on the end of the bed waiting for me. She looked up eyes hesitant, but still yearning.

"You're back," she breathed. It was meant as a statement, but the inflection of her voice indicated that she was unsure.

"If you'll have me," I responded, taking a step forward.

She took in a ragged breath.

"Things need to change."

"I know."

Another step.

She tilted her head.

"We need to figure out a balance."

"We will."

Another step.

I was standing in front of her, fighting the pull until she gave me the okay. After a moment of just staring at each other, I felt her bare foot touch the top of my calf and slide downwards.

Leaning forwards, I pressed my lips against hers, first gently and then more firmly. I took it as slow as I could, simply letting her know just how much I adored her. I let my fingertips trail up and down her arm, loving the goose bumps that rose as a result.

She sighed against my mouth and I suddenly needed more. Apparently she did too. I felt her body moving away from me as she backed up. I didn't want to disconnect from her at all so I followed, lying down beside her, pressing my chest against hers.

It felt like we stayed like that forever, simply touching, caressing, loving, but ever so slowly, our clothes were peeled off and then we were naked. We were bare in every way possible; physically, emotionally.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry," she cried over and over, tears rolling down her gorgeous face, until I covered her mouth with mine again, forcing her to stop. "I shouldn't have. . ."

"Shhh," I hushed her. "I'm right here."

I rolled on top of her, resting in between her legs. I held her head in between my hands and pressed gentle kisses all over her face before landing, once more, on her lips.

Our tongues danced and our bodies writhed. I slid into her and lost my breath. It had been too long. She was incredibly tight and warm and wet. So right. Perfect. Mine.

"I've missed you so much," she whispered. I knew that she wasn't talking about just the past week. She was talking about everything that had been slowly tearing us apart. The near disintegration of our communication, the withdrawal from our physical connection. It all played a part in what had happened.

"Never again," I swore, gritting my teeth at all the physical and emotional sensations that were overwhelming me at that moment.

"I promise," she murmured.

I watched her fall apart for me; only for me, and then joined her.

I don't think I'd ever held her as tight to me as I did that night. And in the morning, as we all got ready to go about our day, I hugged her a little harder, kissed her a little longer and knew that everything would be okay.

That Christmas we decided to spend in New York, just the three of us. Jasper and Alice had just welcomed their daughter Skyler and it was hard to make the decision to stay away, but we needed to refocus our attention on each other.

Everyone at home understood. Even Chief Swan. He said something about spending the holiday down on the reservation and when Bella asked my mom, she said that the Chief may or may not have found some female company. I laughed as Bella tried to come to terms with her warring emotions. She was completely thrilled that her dad wasn't alone anymore and totally icked out at the thought of him having "relations".

We spent a frigid Friday night picking out a tree at the local lot and decorated it with the tackiest ornaments we could find. We went shopping on Fifth Avenue, played in Central Park, and then hibernated in our apartment, reminding ourselves exactly what it was that we had spent so many years fighting for. It rivaled the very first Christmas we spent together as a family.

Bella graduated the following spring. Almost the whole family came out for it. Chief Swan, of course, Jasper and Alice brought Skyler. Rose and Emmett couldn't make it. Their new little guy Brayden had been born with a hole in his heart and was in the NICU. He was scheduled to undergo surgery a few weeks later. They were just waiting until the doctors felt like he was strong enough. Mom and Carlisle were initially hesitant to come out, but Rose encouraged them. They were doing nothing but waiting. So instead, they brought Avery out with them so that my brother and Rose could focus on the baby.

We couldn't spend much time in Washington that summer. Bella had been offered a therapist's position at the mental health center where she did her internship. It was only a temporary position created by a grant, but she was excited and I couldn't help but be excited for her.

After finishing up my board prep in February, I entered the Differentiation and Integration part of medical school. Essentially it was my final year. We were required to take six one month long classes on top of working on a scholarly project and continuing our rotations. We just didn't really have the time to take an extended vacation.

Despite all that, it was like I could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. Bella and I worked hard to make sure that even though we were both busy, we kept to a schedule as much as possible. No, I didn't always make it home for dinner and sometimes not even for bed, but I always made sure to call and sometimes even Skype from my phone to say goodnight. Bella and I never went a week without connecting. We made sure to go out together at least once a month and as a family every other week. I would never again let my family fall apart.

Almost a year after our week long separation, we were happy, secure, strong. Stronger than we'd ever been.

With graduation nearing, I tried to fight the urge. The urge I'd had for years and simply pushed back because it wasn't the right time. But I couldn't fight it anymore and Bella needed to know.

We were lying in bed, sated. . . for the moment; at least physically.

_"Bella?" I whispered against her naked back._

_"Hmmm?" she hummed lazily._

_"Let's make a baby."_

_She was quiet for a few minutes and I was worried that maybe she hadn't heard me. And even more worried that she had and just wasn't answering me._

_"Bella?"_

_"Right now?"_

_I smiled. She didn't say no._

_"I meant soon, but now would work too."_

_She rolled over onto her back so that she could look me in the eyes. Presumably to see if I was serious. I was dead fucking serious. I was ready._

_"Charlie's already seven. Even if we get pregnant right away, he'll be eight. That's a big gap."_

_I watched her bite down on her lip and lower her eyes._

_"I want to see your belly grow with my child," I said, running my hand across her navel. "I want to hear the heartbeat and I want to feel my baby kick."_

_I brushed my lips over her belly button. "I want to be there when we welcome our child into the world. I want to be there for all of it."_

_God did I want that. No. . . I needed it. She had no idea and I didn't know how to tell her without bringing up missing out on it all with Charlie._

_"What about the sleepless nights and the diapers?" Bella asked quietly._

_"I already don't get much sleep and if I can handle some of the shit that comes into the hospital, I can certainly handle my own child's shit."_

_She laughed and I knew I had her._

_"We still have your internship."_

_"I'll do anything, Bella. Whatever you need to make it easier, I'll do." And I would. The wheels were already turning in my head._

_"You really want a baby that bad?"_

_"No," I said, moving my lips up her body. "I want **you** to have my baby that bad. I've wanted it for years, you know that."_

_I kissed around her nipples, making her giggle and squirm, before I rolled over on top of her._

_"When do you want to start trying?"_

_I grinned down at her, trying to hide the excitement that was shooting like a lightening bolt through my body._

_"How bout right now," I growled, nipping at her neck._

_"Ahh. . . It's going to require more planning than that. I'll have to make an appointment to get the IUD out."_

_"Okay," I breathed, rubbing my extremely hard dick against her thigh. "Maybe we can have a warm up."_

_"Another one?" she asked, amused and apparently extremely turned on. She lifted her hips a little and mewled._

_I understood. The more I thought about making a baby with her, the harder I got. I could feel the wetness seeping out of my cock._

_"Are you sure about this?" she whimpered as I pushed inside of her._

_"Absolutely sure," I grunted. "Are you?"_

_"Oh. . . yes!" She gasped._

_I smirked as I sped up my movements. "Was that an 'oh yes' to the baby or an 'oh yes' to what my cock is doing to you?"_

_"Both," Bella nearly yelled as I touched her clit with my thumb._

_"That's what I like to hear," I said, hitching her leg over my hip._

I might have felt a little guilty that I was using my powers of persuasion to encourage my wife to have another baby, but I knew very well that if she didn't want to, she wouldn't.

Luckily, Bella's period was the following week. That was the best time to have the IUD removed and her GYN fit her in right away. Two weeks later we were going at it like rabbits.

I'd never had an actual purpose when having sex, other than to just get off. . . or get her off. I found myself trying to hold off on my orgasms so I could make it count; get as many swimmers inside of her as I could.

Bella thought it was hysterical. There's nothing quite like having your wife laughing at you as you're cumming.

A few weeks later I was sitting on the sofa reading over the final draft of my research paper. Bella was putting Charlie to bed.

_"Edward?" she called, from behind me._

_"Yeah, baby? What's up?" I said, distractedly._

_She didn't say anything and I looked up and turned to face her. She was working her bottom lip like nothing else._

_"What's the matter?" I asked._

_"Um. . .I . . .I'm late," she whispered._

_It took me a minute to figure out what she was saying, but when I did my heart started beating so fast I thought it was going to explode._

_"Fuck. . .really?" I jumped up and grabbed her face in my hands. "Really?"_

_She nodded._

_"Are you. . . do you think you are?"_

_She nodded again. "I think so."_

_"Did you take a test?"_

_"No, not yet. I thought that maybe you'd want to be a part of that."_

_I grinned. "I absolutely want to be a part of that, thank you. Do you have one?"_

_Yes, I was eager._

_"I picked up one earlier today," she said quietly._

_I grabbed her hand and pulled her back to our bathroom._

_"Are you going to stand there and watch me pee?" Bella laughed._

_"Yes."_

_"Why?"_

_"Why not?"_

_"Jesus, Edward."_

_"You got performance anxiety?" I waggled my eyes at her._

_Bella shook her head and rolled her eyes. "You're a dork."_

_I literally watched her every single motion, from the tearing open of the little test stick to the peeing, to the recapping._

_"Three minutes," she announced setting it on the counter top in the bathroom._

_She started to walk out, but I didn't budge._

_"You can't watch it," she protested._

_"Yes I can."_

_"No you can't. It's an unwritten rule; you can't watch a pregnancy test."_

_I looked up at Bella and then back at the test, then at my watch. We had about a minute and a half. I could walk away for a minute and a half._

_I let Bella pull me from the room and back to the kitchen. She grabbed a beer from the fridge, popped the top, and handed it to me._

_I looked at my watch again._

_"Go," she snorted._

_I didn't run back down the hallway, but close enough. Sue me, I was fucking excited._

_But when I got there, I stood outside until Bella reached me._

_"Do you want to look at it?" she grinned._

_"I don't know how to read it."_

_"One line is not pregnant, two lines is pregnant."_

_"What if there's one and a half lines?"_

_I was stalling. Now that the moment was here, I was petrified._

_"Just look at the fucking test, Edward."_

_I picked it up and closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. When I opened them again. . ._

_"Fuck!"_

_"Is that a good fuck or a bad fuck?" Bella asked timidly._

_I turned the stick towards her._

_Two lines. Two lines. Two. Lines._

_Bella's mouth curved up into a radiant smile._

_"We're having a baby."_

_I swooped her up into my arms and crashed my lips against hers. "We're having a baby," I murmured against her mouth._

There was nothing in this world like watching my wife's belly swell with a life that we'd created.

The first three months were pure torture; I felt like Charlie when his class planted seeds for the school spring festival. He sat there day after day waiting for some sign of life. Some sign that he hadn't done it wrong.

My only assurance was the day that we had her first appointment. Bella was eight weeks pregnant. I had a momentary panic when they couldn't find the heartbeat with the Doppler. I'd spent enough time in OB to know that she was early and that it was common, but that's not really reassuring when it's your own child. The doctor pulled out the ultrasound machine and. . . wow. Just fucking wow.

I had no other words. It looked like a kidney bean; with a heartbeat. A strong, healthy heartbeat. I gazed at the screen.

_"That's our baby," I said, holding Bella's hand tightly._

_"Yes, it is," she smiled at me._

_"I didn't do it wrong," I choked._

_Both Bella and the doctor looked at me in confusion, but neither said a word, which was good because I probably wouldn't have been able to talk. I actually got mad when she removed the wand and I couldn't watch our baby. . . just be there anymore._

Slowly, ever so slowly, Bella's body began to change. I noticed her tits first. They were suddenly fuller and rounder. I was drawn to them. But she wouldn't let me touch the motherfuckers.

They hurt, she said. I offered to massage them, but she laughed and pushed me away like I was joking. I wasn't. Her body had always turned me on, but there was something about it during pregnancy that made her fucking irresistible. Maybe it was just the knowledge of what it was doing. I wanted her all the time.

Bella's morning sickness was mild; mostly nausea. She told me that it had been much worse with Charlie. She wasn't throwing up, but she had a hard time eating and hadn't put on more than a pound or two.

We had decided to keep it to ourselves for a little while. Bella wasn't showing, so none of our friends noticed. Once she entered her second trimester, we decided it was time to tell Charlie and then we'd let him tell the rest of the family. We sat him down at the kitchen table and explained that he was going to be a big brother.

At first, he was excited, chattering about his friend Harrison who had a little brother Russell and how they wrestled and played soccer together all the time. Bella explained that it would be a while before the baby would be able to do those things and that it might be a girl like Avery and Skyler.

That seemed to dampen his spirits a little, but he was still excited to tell his grandparents. He was just about to go get the phone when he turned abruptly.

_"Where'd it come from?" he asked, his eyes narrowed and darting between Bella and I._

_"The baby's growing in my belly," Bella explained._

_"I know that," he said, rolling his eyes. "I meeeean. How did it get there?"_

_My eyes widened._

_Shit, I hadn't thought he'd be asking that question so soon._

_"Uh. . ." Bella turned to face me._

_"You're the doctor."_

_"Not yet."_

_"Okay, you're the almost-doctor," she quipped._

_"You want me to get technical with him?"_

_"Hmmmm. Charlie, I will explain it to you another time, okay?"_

_Charlie looked at us like we were crazy and then turned back around and got the phone._

Our families couldn't be happier. My mom was adamant about coming out for the birth. I didn't tell her that I was hoping that she wouldn't have to. I hadn't told Bella yet, but I had applied to three different internship programs in Washington and one in Portland. I told her I'd do anything to make having our baby easier for her and I meant it.

Finally, around week fourteen, I began seeing the roundness I craved. I spent at least an hour every night lavishing attention on her stomach. Sometimes she was awake and she'd run her hands through my hair as I spoke or sang to our baby. Usually she was asleep though and we could have a private conversation.

Occasionally we'd have to have a serious discussion.

_"Baby," I whispered one night._

_"Yes," Bella answered._

_I looked up at her. "Hmmm, you hold on a minute, I was talking to this one." I said pointing to her abdomen._

_"Ooookay."_

_I returned my focus to her belly._

_"I need you to take a nap, little one, cause I'm about to do some very naughty things to your mommy and I'll feel a little awkward knowing you're awake."_

_Bella giggled and I felt her hands in my hair._

_"Now," I said, sliding myself further down the bed and grabbing the waistband of her pajama pants. "I need you to be very quiet. I don't want to wake the baby."_

Life was busy. Bella was working, Charlie was in second grade, I was in my last year of medical school. But I made every single one of her appointments.

The best one by far was the ultrasound.

Bella laid out on this chair in a darkened room. She pulled up her shirt and tucked it into her bra while the ultrasound tech pulled down her pants to just below her hips. Her now extremely round belly was fully on display.

Charlie was with us, standing at my side and holding my hand. He watched as the tech set everything up and then sat down next to Bella.

_"You ready?" she smiled at Bella and then at Charlie and me._

_We all nodded. The ultrasound tech didn't know our history; didn't know that this was my first time and I was nearly bursting at the seams to see, to make sure everything was okay._

_She squirted the transmission gel all over Bella's belly and began poking around._

_"There's our little person," she cooed, looking at the screen._

_And there it was, the baby. All head and spine and fingers._

_Charlie tilted his head and looked at the fuzzy black and white screen._

_"What is that?"_

_"That's the baby, honey," the tech laughed._

_"It doesn't look like a baby."_

_"Sure it does, look." The tech adjusted the wand. "See, that's the face; the forehead, the nose, there's the eyes, and the lips. Do you see it now?"_

_I stared at the screen in complete awe. I'd seen a lot of ultrasounds on my OB-GYN rotation, but nothing could have prepared me for what I was looking at. It was suddenly very, very real. There was a living, breathing, tiny person inside my wife. I grabbed Bella's hand and kissed her knuckles. The emotion of the moment bubbled up into my throat, but I swallowed it back down._

_"I see it," Charlie yelped._

_I let out a whoosh of air, unable to verbalize exactly what I was feeling._

_"Do you want to know the sex?"_

_Charlie looked confused._

_"She's asking if we want to know if it's a boy or a girl," I explained._

_"Oh."_

_Bella shook her head. "Do you?" she asked, looking up at me._

_I did, but. . . I didn't. I'd been in the delivery room when parents knew and I'd been there when they didn't. Both were exciting, but something told me that I wanted to wait._

_"I do!" Charlie piped up._

_"I think we're going to wait, bud," I said rubbing his shoulder._

_He wasn't happy, but the "big brother" gift we picked up from FAO Schwarz later that day made him feel much better._

_It was that night, as we were lying in bed, that I told Bella about the internships._

_"Really?" she squealed._

_"Yeah. I'm thinking either Swedish or Harborview in Seattle or Legacy Good Samaritan in Portland."_

_"Is that where you want to go?" she asked cautiously._

_"Bella," I said smoothly, cupping her chin. "You uprooted everything so that I could go to medical school where I really wanted to go. Remember that whole conversation about it all evening out?"_

_She nodded._

_"I promised you that we would go back. And when we decided to have this baby I promised you that I would do whatever I had to in order to make growing our family easier on you. This is me finally fulfilling that promise."_

_"But. . ."_

_"And I want to," I said before planting a gentle kiss on her soft lips. "It's time."_

I was horribly over-protective of Bella. I wouldn't let her carry groceries, I wouldn't let her lift Charlie in any way, shape or form and I got on her case when she spent too long in the bathtub. I drove her fucking crazy. I tried to convince her to go to a birth prep class, but we couldn't make our schedules work so I settled for buying one we could watch at home. Charlie thought I was crazy. I guess I was.

Bella was fucking horny as hell too. She wanted it every single day and by God, I was gonna give it to her. We hadn't had that much sex since we first started dating. The bigger she got, the more creative we had to be and I nearly had a heart attack the first time she got a cramp while she was cumming. I refused to let her keep going until I finished. The next time it happened I just slowed down and the cramp went away as soon as her orgasm had stopped.

Two things happened the week I graduated from medical school. First, of course, I graduated. It was amazing and so fulfilling to have years and years of work come together and I was one of the top students in my class. My entire family was there and we celebrated in style at the Peter Luger Steakhouse in Brooklyn.

The women fawned over Bella's belly, which had all of the sudden just kind of popped. They tried to guess the sex from the ultrasound pictures and they took her shopping for maternity clothes and gender neutral baby items.

My brother's teased me about "finally getting the job done." I wasn't sure if they were talking about medical school or Bella's pregnancy and neither one would clear that up for me. I preferred to think they were talking about school since I had gotten the job done long before either one of them did when it came to producing children.

Second, I finally felt the baby kick. I was lying down next to Bella. She had been feeling movement for weeks, but every time I tried. . . nothing. It was extremely frustrating. I placed my head against her belly like I always did before bed and I felt a thump against my cheek.

_"What the hell was that?" I asked._

_Bella sat up. "Did you feel that?"_

_"Yeah, but what was it?" I asked stupidly. I knew what I thought it was; I just wanted her to confirm._

_She sighed happily. "That was your child waking up."_

_I stared at her stomach and watched as the skin distorted briefly with another kick._

_"That's really fucking cool!"_

_I spent the next hour trying to make the baby do it again, but he. . .or she, wouldn't. Bella said that there was definitely movement, but I couldn't feel it._

It took another couple of weeks before Charlie's timing allowed him to feel the baby. He reacted much like I did, except without the foul language. He spent hours lying against Bella's stomach waiting for it to happen again.

Finally, it was time to pack up the apartment, bringing us to Charlie's room and the complete chaos that was within.

"I don't want you to stress about this move, Bella. I'll take care of everything, okay?" I kissed her jaw and then her neck. She tilted her head to give me better access.

"I'm done," Charlie mumbled, coming into the kitchen. He stopped when he saw the position that Bella and I were in. He wrinkled his nose, but didn't leave. "Can I have my DS back now?"

"That was like fifteen minutes, Charlie," Bella said in disbelief.

"It's clean," he protested.

Of course it wasn't. It was an eight year old boy's version of clean, which meant that the floor was picked up, but everything was shoved into little boxes and cubbies or set up on the dresser. I didn't want Bella to have to deal with it. She had been trying to wrap up all of her cases at the mental health center before she officially resigned and it had taken its toll on her. That, along with trying to arrange the movers while being twenty-eight weeks pregnant. . . she was just exhausted. So I helped Charlie clean. It took about an hour and a shitload of bitching and moaning from him, but we finally got it all set.

The move itself was fairly easy. The moving company took two days to pack everything up and once they did, we turned in our keys and hopped a cab to the airport. The car was being shipped. Bella usually had to pee every two hours and there was no way we were doing another road trip. It would take us a month.

Bella's car had never left Forks. It was still sitting in my parent's garage. We were planning on staying in the garage apartment until we could find a place in Seattle. This time we were buying. Our things would be in storage until we knew where to have them delivered.

Bella and I spent two weeks house hunting in and around the Seattle area. It was kind of shocking to see how expensive homes really were. Not nearly as expensive as they were in some parts of New York, but still pricey. We ended up shelling out just under two million for a five bedroom three and a half bathroom home. Well, we actually put down fifty percent from my trust and mortgaged the rest. The family accountant recommended a mortgage for tax purposes. I didn't get it, but Carlisle seemed to agree so we went with it.

We closed on the house and got everything moved in just in time for my internship to start.

July first, I was standing nervously with five other interns in front of three residents and an attending.

The first couple of days we were just expected to shadow and become acquainted with how things worked. After that, we were propelled forward. We were doctors now and it was time for us to act like it.

It wasn't easy. The shifts were long, but they made sure we got breaks. I tried not to worry about Bella and Charlie too much. I spent every waking moment I had with them. After all the years I'm not sure it would ever feel like enough, but Bella reassured me that they were okay. That _we_ were okay.

They had made friends with the Thornton's; the family next door. The Thornton's had a little girl named Daisy who was about six months younger than Charlie. The two had been inseparable since we had moved in. He was thrilled because she could ride a bike and climb trees better than most of the boys he knew back in New York.

Amanda Thornton proved to be a good friend for Bella. Sometimes when I'd come home from night shift, the women would be sitting on the back patio drinking coffee or tea and watching the kids chase each other around. It was nice to know that my wife had a friend so close.

As Bella's due date approached, I started to get more and more antsy about going to work. I talked my mom into coming up to stay with us so that I wouldn't worry so much. She had a few projects taking place in Seattle so it was easy for her. I still worried.

I didn't want there to be any chance of Bella being alone when she went into labor. I kept thinking about what she must have gone through when Charlie was born and how scared she must have been. I knew that this time would be different, because come hell or high water, I would be in that delivery room with her, but it still made me nervous.

One morning in August, I kissed my wife and child goodbye and made my way to work for a thirty-six hour shift. The entire day was non-stop. I called Bella twice to see how she was doing, but of course she was fine. She and my mom had taken Charlie and Daisy to the zoo. She was determined to "walk the baby out". I couldn't really blame her. Carrying an additional forty-five pounds on her tiny frame couldn't have been easy.

Around five in the morning, I got the okay from my attending to take a break. Exhausted, I made my way to one of the lesser used break rooms and fell onto the cot. I set the alarm on my phone for nine-thirty and turned off my pager. It seemed like that fucker was going off every five minutes and I needed sleep. I didn't even remember drifting off, but I awoke some time later to someone shaking me.

"Edward, man, wake up."

"What?" I mumble, trying to open my eyes. I could tell it was Paul, but hadn't actually looked at him yet.

"Wake up. They've been calling you for the last hour."

"I've been on a thirty-six hour shift," I groaned.

How did they expect me to be able to do anything if I couldn't keep my eyes open.

"What the hell? Did you turn off your pager?"

"Yeah, I'm not due back on until ten."

"Your cell phone?"

I looked around patting my pockets. I finally spotted my cell phone on the table.

"It's over there. Why? What's the matter?"

I finally looked up at him and saw the concern in his eyes. I was suddenly on edge.

"Your wife."

That woke me right the fuck up.

"What's the matter with Bella?"

"She was brought in about an hour and a half ago. She's in full labor, Ed."

"What?" I yelled standing up.

"No one knew where you were. They've been calling you over the loud speaker. Just. . . go. I think she's ready to pop."

"Fuck!" I growled, grabbing my phone and running out the door.

It took me five minutes to get to L&D.

"Hello, Dr. Cullen," the nurse at the station smiled.

"Hey, Renata. My wife?"

"Room 310."

"Thanks," I said quickly.

"Baby, I'm so sorry," I pleaded as I burst into the room. I expected to find the whole labor and delivery team ready for the birth of my child, but all I found was Bella, lying in the hospital bed, completely calm. My mother was sitting next to her in a chair and they were both looking at me with amused expressions.

"Are you okay?" Bella asked cautiously.

"Paul said you were in active labor, ready to pop."

"I'm not ready to pop yet," she laughed. "They checked me about ten minutes ago. I'm dilated six centimeters, eighty percent effaced."

"Why are you so calm?" I frowned. I could feel my heart beating frantically in my chest at just the idea of it all happening. And yet Bella was cool as a fucking cucumber.

"They also gave me the epidural," she grinned. "I feel okay."

Her face winced a little and I finally took the time to look at the monitors. On the first monitor, was Bella's heart rate and blood pressure and underneath it was the baby's. It read a steady 155 beats per minute. Next to that was the one that measured her contractions. She had just had one.

I breathed out and made my way to the bed, pressing my lips against hers and running my hand over her head.

"Did your water break?" I asked

"No. They broke it when I got here," she said looking like she was reliving a very unpleasant memory. Which, she probably was. Just the thought of the hook they inserted in there to snag the bag made me shudder.

"So we're having this baby today." It wasn't a question. I knew very well that once the water was broken, that baby was coming.

"I guess so."

"Hello, mom. Thanks so much for bringing my beautiful pregnant wife in. Why hello, sweetheart. My pleasure. Anything for my nearest and dearest," my mom teased.

I glanced at her and snorted. "Hey, Mom. Thank you for bringing my beautiful pregnant wife in."

She laughed. "Are you working?"

"No, I was sleeping. I'm supposed to be back on at ten."

Bella looked up at the clock. It was eight. "Uh. . . are you going back?" she asked, her face the picture of disappointment.

I scoffed. "After everything we've been through, you really think I'm going to leave you now? I told you I wasn't going to miss a moment and I won't."

She smiled and bit her lip, just as another contraction hit.

"I'm going to go get some coffee and call the troops," my mom said, leaving Bella and I alone.

I pulled a chair up next to the bed and grabbed her hand. "Are you really okay?"

I hated seeing her uncomfortable, even knowing that at the end of it all we'd have a perfect little person in our arm.

"I'm fine, Edward," she said, running a hand through my hair.

"Where's Charlie?" I asked.

"He's with the Thornton's. I called Amanda when the contractions were about ten minutes apart and she came over to stay with him until he woke up. I told her you'd call as soon as the baby got here."

I sat with Bella for the next two hours while her contractions got stronger and stronger. My mother was in and out of the room, fielding phone calls and relaying information. The nurses checked her regularly and at ten fifteen Bella was ready to go.

"Ten centimeters, Bella. I'll call Doctor Stewart."

Bella laughed.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Is Dr. Stewart on call?" she asked the nurse.

"Yes, why?"

"He delivered Charlie."

"He did?" I was surprised that I hadn't known that. I'd worked with Dr. Stewart before when he came down to the ER for an OB-GYN consultation.

The nurse looked over at me. I could see the questions in her eyes, but she never voiced them.

Dr. Stewart entered the room and looked up at me. "Dr. Cullen, I didn't realize. . ." he looked at the chart. "Isabella Cullen. Ah, I didn't even make the connection. is this your wife?"

"Yes, sir."

"I haven't seen you before have I, Isabella?" he started flipping through the papers.

"Actually. . ." Bella tried, but she had to grit her teeth as her belly hardened.

"Oh!" he said, his eyebrows jumping up into his receding hairline. "I delivered a baby for you eight years ago. A boy. A big one." He laughed.

"Yes, you did," I smiled. "Charlie."

"Is this going to be your second then?"

"Yeeeeees," Bella choked as another contraction hit. They had turned down her epidural so that she knew when to push. Apparently, it was time.

"Do we know what we're expecting here?" Dr. Stewart asked as he scrubbed his hands in the sink and donned gloves.

"No. We figured it would be a nice surprise," I said, looking at Bella who was beginning to sweat.

Her hair was in a ponytail, but a few strands had escaped and were now plastered to her forehead. My mom handed me a wet towel and I swiped it along Bella's face.

"You ready to do this?"

"Do I have a choice?" Bella winced.

Dr. Steward chuckled. "No, this baby is coming with or without your permission."

"Then I guess I'm ready."

My knee was bouncing up and down like a fucking jackrabbit. Bella was ready. The baby was ready. I was. . . not quite sure I was ready.

"Okay, next contraction I want you to push, okay?"

Bella nodded. Her feet were in the stirrups, her knees pulled up almost to her chest. If I hadn't been a part of my share of births, I probably would have taken issue with this man's face so close to my wife's goods.

I looked over at the monitors to see that the baby's heartbeat was still strong just as Dr. Stewart urged Bella to push. My mom was on one side of Bella holding her hand while I was on the other. I counted to ten while she bore down.

She gasped for breath when Dr. Stewart told her to stop pushing and looked over at me.

"Edward, if this baby is over nine pounds I'm never doing this again."

I heard the nurses and my mom giggle.

"Whatever you say, baby," I chuckled.

"Don't patronize me while I'm giving birth to your child," she said, trying to sound angry. But she couldn't quite pull it off. "I'm seeeerious," she whimper-laughed. "Ahhhhh!"

"Push, Bella. Let's get that baby out of there."

Thirty minutes of pushing and several dozen profanities later and the baby had crowned. I had to see. I looked down and saw a full head of dark hair.

"One more push, Bella," Dr. Stewart urged.

"Come on, baby, almost there," I encouraged.

Bella grunted and gripped my hand so hard I thought it was going to snap in half.

There was a rush of commotion. Bella gasped loudly and I was momentarily distracted by the look of relief on her face.

"It's a boy!" Dr. Stewart announced as he suctioned out the baby's mouth.

A boy.

I watched in complete and total awe as he held our son up to show Bella. My heart stopped; everything slowed down. I could no longer hear the beeps of the monitors or the sounds of the people. It was like someone had put their hands over my ears. All I could focus on was the baby.

My boy.

I honestly did not know how long I stayed there gaping. It felt like forever, but it couldn't have been more than a minute. And then the most beautiful sound shattered through the fog my brain was shrouded in and I shook my head. He was crying. My son was crying.

My son.

"Daddy, do you want to cut the cord?"

I looked over at the nurse and nodded. Of course I wanted to cut the motherfucking cord. I squeezed Bella's hand and then let go as I was handed the scissors. My mom snapped a picture just as I snipped through the tough white rope that connected mother and child.

The nurse smiled and took him from Dr. Stewart.

"Good job, honey. I'm going to clean him up now, okay?" she announced.

My mom held up her camera. "Do you want me to go or do you want to go with him?"

I looked at Bella. "Go," she whispered. I worried for a moment about leaving her. She looked kind of pale. But then she smiled. "I've still got stuff to do. Go."

"She'll be okay, sweetheart," Mom soothed.

I bent down and kissed Bella reverently, closing my eyes as I brought her upper lip in between mine. When I released her, she reached her hand up and brushed my cheek. It was only then that I realized that I was actually crying.

"You did so good, baby," I whispered. "Thank you. Oh, God, Bella, thank you."

She nudged my nose with hers. "Go be with him and then bring him back to me."

"As you wish, my love," I smiled. I went to kiss her once more and one of my tears fell onto her face. "I love you."

"So much," she mouthed.

I stood up and handed my mom the cool washcloth that I had a death grip on before going to join the nurse who was cleaning up the baby and taking his vitals. I snapped about a hundred pictures in thirty seconds.

"He's nice and pink," the nurse smiled.

"He's perfect," I murmured.

"Of course he is. Ten little fingers, ten little toes. He kind of looks like his mama."

I tilted my head and looked at him. It was hard to tell.

"Do you have a name?" she asked him sweetly.

"Yes, but we're going to wait until the rest of the family gets here to announce it," I answered.

"Fair enough," she said lifting him up and setting him on the scale. She turned and grinned broadly at me as the numbers came up.

"Oh my God," I snorted.

She quickly wrapped him up and suddenly I found myself with a blinking newborn in my arms.

I stared at him. He stared at me. At least, it looked like he was staring at me, but even if he could have focused, all that goop on his eyes would have made it impossible for him to actually see anything.

It felt like my heart was expanding in my chest. At one point, not that long ago I had actually questioned whether or not I could be a father; whether I wanted to be a father. And here I was, completely and utterly smitten with not one, but two sons.

"Hi, little guy," I cooed. "You wanna go see your mommy?"

Dr. Stewart was just standing up when I brought the baby back to Bella.

"She's good as new," he said, standing up and peeling his gloves off. He leaned over and looked at the baby. "Beautiful. You guys did good work."

"Thank you," I said softly.

Dr. Stewart excused himself as did the pediatric nurse.

The L & D nurse was now helping Bella re-situate herself in a seated position as my mom tried very hard to control her excitement. I knew she wanted to hold the baby, but was holding back.

Once Bella was ready, I handed the baby to her and started snapping pictures again.

"So, what's the verdict on the weight?" Mom asked. I could see by the twinkle in her eye that she had been looking when he was weighed.

Bella's eyes flickered up to mine with a bit of hesitation.

I cleared my throat. "Eight pounds fifteen point five ounces."

"Are you kidding me?" Bella yelped.

"No," I laughed. "You said over nine pounds. This baby is not over nine pounds."

She opened her mouth to protest, but then stopped. She looked back down at the baby and her face broke out into a huge smile.

"Can you call Amanda?" she asked my mother. "I'd like for Charlie to see the baby first."

"Sure, honey," Mom agreed, placing a kiss on Bella's forehead.

"Are you planning to breast feed?" the nurse asked.

"Mmmhmm," Bella hummed.

"Would you like some help getting him latched on?"

This was the part of the process I'd never been privy to.

"Can you just stay and make sure I do it right?" Bella asked.

"Sure, sweetie."

The nurse helped Bella pull down one side of her gown and situate the baby with his mouth at her breast.

It was like he knew exactly what to do. I wondered if that was a boy thing or if all babies knew how to put their mouths on breasts.

He latched his little lips around her nipple and started sucking. It was fucking fascinating.

The nurse poked her finger around his mouth and then pulled back.

"Perfect," she said with a nod. "Let me know if you need anything else."

Finally, Bella and I were left alone with our new little bundle.

"Are you happy?" she asked as I stared at our son.

I looked up at her. I couldn't fight the tears in my eyes. "Beyond happy," I sniffed. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For everything. For this, for him. For not giving up on us when you had every reason to."

She rubbed her free hand against my jaw. "I never would have given up on us, Edward. I knew we'd find our way back eventually."

I wiped my hand over my eyes.

"Were you hoping for a girl?" Bella asked tentatively.

"I wanted a healthy baby."

"That's what everyone says," she laughed.

"Well, what did you want?"

She bit her lip. "I wanted a healthy baby."

"See."

I stroked her hand with my thumb. "Are you tired?"

"Um, yes. And no. I'm tired, but I'm wide awake. If that makes sense."

I knew exactly what she meant.

"Makes perfect sense."

I was mesmerized by the sight of our son suckling.

"I suppose those are off limits to me now," I said, sticking my lower lip out in a slight pout.

"Until this one here is done, yes."

I sighed dramatically.

By the time my mom returned, Bella had stopped nursing. Mom had Charlie with her. He was holding a little blue bear.

"We stopped by the gift shop," Mom explained.

Charlie took a few tentative steps forward. "It's a boy?" he asked quietly.

"You have a brother," Bella smiled. "Would you like to hold him?"

Charlie nodded. He washed his hands and then sat down in the big cushy chair in the corner. I took the baby from Bella and situated him in Charlie's arms.

"He's so little," he whispered. "What's his name?"

XXXXXX

"Oh, Bells, I missed it all again," Chief Swan sighed, kissing Bella's cheek and looking down at the new little bundle.

"It's okay, Dad. I don't think you would have wanted to actually be in here anyway," Bella giggled.

The room was filled to capacity. Every single member of our family was there including the four older children.

There was chatter, laughter, crying and whining. Bella's eyes were starting to droop. It was time to introduce our son and then get them the hell out. As much as I appreciated their love and support, my wife needed to sleep.

Carlisle could see the same thing.

"Okay, son, tell us his name so we can all say hello and then let you guys get some sleep."

"Sorry," Bella yawned.

"Nonsense," Mom shushed, while rocking back and forth with her newest grandchild in her arms.

"Charlie?"

"Henry Masen Cullen," he announced proudly.

"Named after Grampa Masen." Alice grinned.

"Yes, and also Henry Jane," I added. "Mrs. Jane's late husband."

"Does Althea know?" Carlisle asked.

"I called her a little bit ago. She cried."

"I can imagine," he chuckled.

After everyone got a good look at Henry, they said their goodbyes. Mom and Carlisle were going to serve dinner for everyone at our house and then look after Charlie overnight so that I could stay with Bella.

I'd gotten a temporary leave from my rounds for two weeks to spend time with my family. A sort of paternity leave. Henry was only born two days early so my attending was expecting it and had planned for it.

Henry was an amazing baby. Everything he did made my heart ache in a good way. As the weeks passed, he began to look more and more like Bella, which made me happy. Not that I didn't want him to look like me, but there was something special about the fact that Charlie was my mirror. Like it was meant to be. Like nature or God knew exactly what needed to be done to bring us together.

Bella and I stood in the doorway of the nursery. It was a rainy Sunday afternoon and Charlie had been supervising Henry's tummy time. Apparently they had worn themselves out, because he was curled up on the floor fast asleep, with his baby brother tucked into his side.

My arm was draped lazily over Bella's shoulders and she leaned into me, rubbing her cheek against my chest.

"There is nothing better than seeing them like this," Bella sighed. "I hope that they're close."

"I think they will be," I said, kissing her head.

"Maybe we should have had a baby earlier. I mean, Charlie's so much older."

"We weren't ready to have a baby before this, Bella. As much as I may have wanted one, it would have been a whole lot more difficult. You know that."

"Yeah, I do. I just worry that by the time Henry needs a playmate, Charlie's going to want to be out and about chasing girls."

"Then I guess we'll just have to have more kids," I teased.

"More kids?" Bella asked, looking up at me.

"Baby, I want a whole house full."

BPOV

A house full of children. That's exactly what we got. Two years after Henry was born, I gave birth to Spencer Jacob and two and a half years later, Wyatt Alexander joined us. I swore I was done. I had four boys, one of them a teenager. A teenager who could not hide the fact that he was completely in love with his best friend.

Charlie was so much like his father in some ways and so different in others. He was outgoing and popular, talented and smart. But when it came to girls, he was shy. Edward and I watched as he and Daisy danced around each other. We didn't interfere. If it was meant to be, it would be regardless of what we said or did.

The year I turned thirty-five, I gave birth to my fifth and final child. Sophie Jane Cullen. She was born six weeks early weighing four pounds three ounces; less than half the weight of her four older brothers. Every single male in my household was completely enamored with her, as was my dad and his wife of ten years, Sue. We got so much pink shit it was like a bottle of pepto exploded in our house. But my boys didn't care. They happily played with pink teddy bears if it meant seeing that little girl smile.

I continued to work in mental health, opening up a private practice counseling children and families. After years of watching Rose and Emmett struggle with Brayden's heart issues, Edward became a pediatric cardiologist. A damn good one. We were busy, but we made time for ourselves, each other and our children.

You see, Edward and I made a vow; that even if it was only for a night, we'd find the time to be a couple. Not mommy and daddy, but Edward and Bella. And occasionally we'd even get a couple of days away, especially as the kids got older. Family holidays were insane. With our kids joining Emmett and Rose's three, and Jasper and Alice's two, there was never, ever a quiet moment in Esme and Carlisle's house. If I had thought that first Christmas with Charlie was bad. . .ten grandchildren made for very little floor space.

And birthday parties were even worse. Jake and Claire added their three to the brood and Riley and Lizzie, who never did get married, happily welcomed two little boys of their own. I wouldn't ever call Edward and Riley friends, but they were amicable. Lizzie and I, however, met up frequently for playdates with the boys.

Time passed, as time does; sometimes way too fast, and before I knew it, my baby, my first one, was all grown up.

The day that Charlie and Daisy left to go to college together at Dartmouth was one of the saddest and proudest days of my life. I watched, tears pouring from my eyes, my heart breaking as my baby boy finished loading his car. I couldn't even bear to say goodbye. He hugged me tightly, begging me not to cry and telling me he'd be back in a few months. As they drove away, I melted into Edward. My rock.

Bits and pieces of Charlie's life flashed before me backwards, until I reached the day he was born. I remembered the words I had spoken to my father that day. He was unplanned perfection. He was our gift, our life. Without him, Edward and I may never have known the kind of love that we now shared.

I could never have anticipated the journey that life would take me on. But sometimes, that's what makes it worth living.

XXXXXX

**AN: I promised you an HEA. Sorry about separating it, but it had to be done. **

**So, this is the hard part, as least for me. **

**I started writing this story a little over a year ago with no intention of ever posting it. I was writing it for myself, a way to deal with my emotions. When I finally decided to post it, with a little encouragement, I had no idea that it would become what it has. I have never let ANYONE read anything I've written. I was afraid of criticism. I still kind of am, but I'm getting better. LOL. **

**I don't know if you all can understand what you have given me through this experience. I honestly am not quite sure I can put it into words. Not my words anyway. LOL. I have kept every single review, good and bad. Each one has affected me in some way.**

**Make sure you have me on author alert. I still have at least one Outtake on UP. And I have several other stories in progress right now. **

**If I thanked everyone who has helped me personally like I really want to, this document would be 100,000 words.**

**So to everyone who reviewed, pimped, rec'd, blogged. I hate that I cannot list you individually. :o( I'll probably think of more once this is all posted. **

**Paige encouraged me to post this in the first place. **

**Twimom76 took me under her wing very early and pimped my booty out there hard core. **

**Beegurl13- well I don't know if I'm allowed to say what you did for me, but you know. LOL. **

**My PLF girls. You make me laugh, you support me when I'm having issues in RL or fic life. And you bring out my inner perv, which is always a good thing ;oD **

**Lexie2516 was my very first review AND started the thread for me. She has also become such a wonderful pre-reader and I flove her. **

**Melee03-Sigh, always there to listen to me vent and provide comfort. Even if it's 3 am where you are. You make me wonderful banners and that shithot blinkie. You have become an amazing friend. :oD**

**Mollie-My wifey, my FF soulmmate. Always balancing me, challenging me, pushing me, supporting me. I DO NOT know what I would do without you. You have put so much of yourself into this story and I can never thank you enough for everything you do. **


	42. Author's Note:

**Hey everyone. This is obviously not a chapter. Sorry. I just figured this was the easiest way to get out the notification that I have posted the third outtake: Bella and Edward's tequila night in Vail, under Unplanned Perfection Outtakes on my proile. **

**If you're interested, it's there. If not, just know that I'm still working on epi review replies. I'm up to June 21st and hope to be all caught up in the next couple of days! Thank you. **

**Much love, **

**~Lc~**


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